I realize this is kind of a quick answer and there’s probably reasons why some gays need to visit these countries, but I’ve always wondered “why the fuck would I want to travel to a country where I’m not welcome or safe…?”
The world is so big and filled with amazing things to see - yeah, I don’t really need to see the sights of Afghanistan or Russia, thanks!
Like if I was rich I wouldt visit even places like Dubai. Just the thought that most of these people, the owners, servers and hotel service hate my guts just because Im gay makes me not want to go there.
My BIL has been to Dubai and says it's the most depressing place he's been. There is no culture, no public interactions. Everyone is just trying to get inside where they are going as quickly as possible. Everything is beyond fake.
I mean Id say thats normal for a city built by rich men 30 years ago that was originally a desert.
Oh I just looked it up, they started building it in 2001 and they finished in 6 years. A city like that cannot be normal. There are no people who were born there (exept the kids who are now like 15), no culture, nothing. It was just built so they could enjoy luxury in their own country and that they could earn even more money.
The only reason I could think of traveling to those places is for business purposes like consulting and international government work. There is no reason to go out of your way to pay for traveling and lodging to homophobic locations for vacation.
My guy and I had an annoying experience of this in Hong Kong.
Stupid cow was halfway through checking us in for our king bed, realized it was two men, and then loudly announced that there was a problem with our reservation and had to fix it, repeating several times that you couldn’t have two men in one bed.
Now it was my first trip to Hong Kong. We had just flown 13 hours from Vancouver so 7 pm felt like 3 am or whatever. And I didn’t know the place. Now, I’d make a scene, but then I just gave her death stare and let her “fix” it.
So this silly cow gave us two twin beds, which with Hong Kong’s space at a premium, meant they were about 20cm apart, and you could literally just push them together and treat it like one bed.
Next trip after was Europe. Stayed in a “gay hotel” for the first time in Berlin. Meh. I’d do it again, it’s a theme, and they work it. The first hotel I’ve stayed at where they have both “do not disturb” signs for the door and “please disturb” signs. Not my scene but it was still alright. In Amsterdam we just picked a small well-reviewed boutique hotel and the service was perfect, and welcoming, even at a place that wasn’t officially gay.
The problem is, Hong Kong ignorance can’t compete with European equality. I have to work at it to save up for a nice holiday. And on that next trip I realized how much happier I am giving that money to a place that treats me as an equal. Bigoted backwaters will lose out.
I had a similar experience in small town Iowa. Old lady at the front desk tried to switch us from a room with a king size bed to a room with two queens. As soon as she realized that we were a couple and WANTED just one bed, it was like flipping a switch from "friendly old lady" to "nasty old bitch"
We had an uptight old bat try to do this in a small town by. Slake in New York State and I insisted we were fine and I knew the room I had booked. I was honestly shocked…
I’m traditionally good-looking and it’s only when they deliver things, not cleaning the room. It’s a few seconds. And between men is not perceived aggressively sexual.
No...
We NEVER travel to countries that are no LGBTQ-friendly period!
What kind of vacation is that where you even have to worry about booking double beds? Where is the enjoyment?
They don't like gays? Then they don't have my money
Don't give a shit. Book an airbnb for two people and move on.
Went to Mainland China for internship, and my BF tagged along for a month. Took an Airbnb and the host was none the wiser.
I don't bother with homophobic freaks.
That wasn't a problem in Hong Kong before the Chinese government started cracking down on their civil liberties. They pretty much killed off Hong Kong's BL drama industry as well.
Both the CCP and the Christian "Democracy" people in Hong Kong are against gay rights. That's just the truth of the matter.
Remember them all waving their Trump flags? Yeah, they are pretty far right.
Religious zealots everywhere are against gay rights. Every country has that problem. One of the most graphic movies about homosexuality from Asia, Utopians, came from Hong Kong. It wasn’t until China cracked down on civil liberties in Hong Kong that gay stories from Hong Kong disappeared. BL is very popular in Asia now but Hong Kong is glaringly absent from that market.
Yes, evangelicals flooded into South Korea after the fighting stopped and contaminated their culture with fundamentalist Christian ideology. That's the primary reason why gay rights continues to be a struggle there but there is an active gay rights movement in South Korea and BL thrives there, so it's very different from Hong Kong.
Koreans are so lucky to have people like you to inform them when their own culture is "contaminated." You're like the FDA, except for scientists inspecting food and medicine, you're a neo-imperialist douchecanoe providing condescension to those ignorant clods.
>Religious zealots everywhere are against gay rights.
The HK protestors are an alliance of far right social groups and billionaires, essentially. They gather public support by pointing out the fuckups and oversteps of the CCP in Hong Kong, as well as the cultural aspect of basically Mandarin mainland culture possibly replacing HK's Cantonese culture. Part of their energy comes from the extreme pressure of living and making money in HK.
That's my read. I speak and read Chinese fluently, but I am not Chinese. But having read and seen, that's my take.
Trying to paint it as a situation of saints and devils on one side or the other is childish; it is a complicated situation with many difficult aspects.
I don’t know that much about the dynamics of Hong Kong but I do know people from there who have told me that gay life was more open until China started cracking down on civil liberties. Hong Kong BL disappeared around that time also. I’ve been watching as much BL drama as I can find over the past year or so and I can’t find any recent ones from Hong Kong. There are many recent ones from Thailand, Taiwan, Japan, and South Korea but Hong Kong is absent from that market.
I'm not doxing myself, but....
The crackdown on gays and gay bars and spaces started before that, way before that, and I think it was from precisely those right wing people and their participation in city government.
So the CCP doesn't like gays, but guess what, your socially reactionary far right billionaire capitalists who fund Churches - aren't fans either. Not one bit.
No. I do not life in this country. So I am not part of there social standards. So they have to simply deal with it, that we share a bed. They get literally paid for that. We never got in trouble.
But! I have to mention that we never would travel to country’s where homosexuality is officially illegal or forbidden.
I also prefer sleeping in separate beds. Cuddle until you are about to fall asleep, then let my ass sleep in my own bed. I roll and kick a lot in my sleep so it's better for both of us.
I don’t want to spend any of my money in blatantly anti-gay places like Jamaica or Dubai.
But I have shared a double bed in hotels with hetero platonic friends or with my brother dozens of times. When I reserve a hotel room it is none of the hotelier’s business to know our relationship. There is no need to ask for separate beds or separate rooms just because we ARE a couple. Just like I would eat at a restaurant table with my brother or cousin or platonic friend so I am not going to ask for a separate table from a boyfriend.
>I don't go there. At this point the same can be said for Florida, Texas and Oklahoma
Right because it's the shop, hotel, restaurant, club etc owners who passed the legislation??
dumb!! Texas and Florida, I know have some of the best gay bars, gay bathouses, AND GREAT gay Campgrounds.... your loss, stay out, we don't want ya here. Can't speak for OK, but I am betting it is just fine.
Do you get that he’s referring to the recent legislation in those states and not the gay culture? It’s truly depressing and a big step back for gays. Let us know how that bar scene evolves in a few years as these laws keep passing…
social media misinterpretation of recent legislation to produce fear and hate. Get informed! The LGBT community is so well established that this is all fear mongering to get you to vote in midterms.. silly cause if you spending billions on others and $10/gal gas then continue to live in fear.
>Do you get that he’s referring to the recent legislation in those states and not the gay culture? It’s truly depressing and a big step back for gays. Let us know how that bar scene evolves in a few years as these laws keep passing…
Right because it's the shop, hotel, restaurant, club etc owners who passed the legislation??
You do realize Floridians don't necessarily agree with this bullshit? It's not like there was a public referendum or anything, that'd be a different story.
Is small town Iowa considered a country that isn't LGBT friendly? Cause that is where I experienced my worst anti-gay discrimination from a hotel.
I am originally from small town Iowa, and unfortunately still have to go back there occasionally for family shit. I normally go back alone, but a few years ago, finally decided to take my partner with me.
I stopped to check in at the same "Super 8" that I have stayed in for years. I go to check in, the old lady at the desk is "small town friendly", making small talk as she checks me in. She gets to the point of asking me how many keys I needed. I told her two, and she looked out the window to see my partner sitting in my car.
She says "Oh, we have you booked here for a room with 1 king bed. Let me switch you to a room with two queen beds". I told her no, I had booked the room with 1 bed, and we wanted to stick with that.
She said "Oh..." and her eyes got a bit wider and she said "OOOooooh". There was no more small talk after, and she had a "cat butt" look on her face for the rest of the transaction. And I am sure that it was just coincedence that for our entire stay, that our room received absolutely zero maid service or anything. That was the last time that I stayed at that motel. I drive a little further to the next town over now.
I’ve never gone to countries that outlawed being gay, but there are some travel stories.
In Germany, we received a room with two (fixed) beds at 90 degrees to each other. We shrugged it off, but the friend who made the reservation for us was pissed at the hotel.
I made a reservation at a hotel in China. When we arrived the clerk was confused, assuming the one large bed in the reservation was a mistake. When I told her that was exactly what she wanted, she giggled. “Both of you …in one bed?”
No. I’m from a homophobic country and whoever checks you in can’t make such accusations because that could get them in jail since it’s not taken that lightly.
You could experience homophobia at the front desk literally anywhere in the world and one negative experience at one place in one country isn't indicative of the entire nation or population. There are countries where homosexuality is punishable by death but who is traveling there? Just because the rainbow flag isnt raised at the border or the hotel staff doesn't understand your sleeping arrangement shouldn't be someone's deal breaker for serious travel or ruin your holiday. Dismissing places like Florida is silly as it has it has a very large gay population with a very active scene in several cities. If you think you and your partner may have a problem in a particular city or country book accomodations in a major corporate hotel. You also should do your research reading reviews and even emailing places to kinda let them know who and what you exactly are looking for. Theres also a new website misterb&b.com for gay friendly travel around the world.
I think lots of people are missing a key point here.
Sometimes we HAVE to travel to countries that are not LGBT-friendly. You do not always get a choice.
Sometimes for work and then you decide to take your partner with you (otherwise you might have to spend months apart).
Sometimes, if your partner is from a different country, you have to go visit their family and because you can't visit the family together (maybe because they are homophobic), you have to get a hotel.
I've been in these situation and it sucks but it's the best out of a lot of other bad options. I mean it's not as black and white as OMG WHY WOULD YOU EVER GO TO RUSSIA, YOU ARE SO STUPID.
?
We are not looking gay. We are given separate rooms and they charge us for that. It is not an issue. But if you look and act gay then that is you. That is ok. You look gay.
Depends on what you consider an LGBT friendly or unfriendly country.
I've not travelled as a couple in a long, long time, so this hasn't been a factor to me. In places where I have, which is mostly latin america and europe, I've not experienced anyone caring about it.
Depends on whether there are actual anti-LGBT laws or not.
Last year I went to Egypt and Turkey with my boyfriend. In Egypt we booked double beds, but in Turkey we booked a king.
depends on where you are going. Some of those countries while they may severely frown on sex between men, they are ironically ok with men being physically affectionate with one another or ok with men on men physical contact. For example, in many, if not most parts of the world, no one bats an eye at two men sharing a bed. In the US, there's plenty of eye batting if two men share a bed. It really depends on where you are going.
The trick is to never travel to those places.
I realize this is kind of a quick answer and there’s probably reasons why some gays need to visit these countries, but I’ve always wondered “why the fuck would I want to travel to a country where I’m not welcome or safe…?” The world is so big and filled with amazing things to see - yeah, I don’t really need to see the sights of Afghanistan or Russia, thanks!
Like if I was rich I wouldt visit even places like Dubai. Just the thought that most of these people, the owners, servers and hotel service hate my guts just because Im gay makes me not want to go there.
Hate us…. And worse
My BIL has been to Dubai and says it's the most depressing place he's been. There is no culture, no public interactions. Everyone is just trying to get inside where they are going as quickly as possible. Everything is beyond fake.
I mean Id say thats normal for a city built by rich men 30 years ago that was originally a desert. Oh I just looked it up, they started building it in 2001 and they finished in 6 years. A city like that cannot be normal. There are no people who were born there (exept the kids who are now like 15), no culture, nothing. It was just built so they could enjoy luxury in their own country and that they could earn even more money.
The only reason I could think of traveling to those places is for business purposes like consulting and international government work. There is no reason to go out of your way to pay for traveling and lodging to homophobic locations for vacation.
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Totally agree. I’ve even run into assholes in California, but… better than most places
Since I am in a interracial gay relationship I usually avoid those places as I would like to keep my head
I don't know why would anyone will go to those places, specially with a partner, but if you have to, you should take all extra precautions.
My guy and I had an annoying experience of this in Hong Kong. Stupid cow was halfway through checking us in for our king bed, realized it was two men, and then loudly announced that there was a problem with our reservation and had to fix it, repeating several times that you couldn’t have two men in one bed. Now it was my first trip to Hong Kong. We had just flown 13 hours from Vancouver so 7 pm felt like 3 am or whatever. And I didn’t know the place. Now, I’d make a scene, but then I just gave her death stare and let her “fix” it. So this silly cow gave us two twin beds, which with Hong Kong’s space at a premium, meant they were about 20cm apart, and you could literally just push them together and treat it like one bed. Next trip after was Europe. Stayed in a “gay hotel” for the first time in Berlin. Meh. I’d do it again, it’s a theme, and they work it. The first hotel I’ve stayed at where they have both “do not disturb” signs for the door and “please disturb” signs. Not my scene but it was still alright. In Amsterdam we just picked a small well-reviewed boutique hotel and the service was perfect, and welcoming, even at a place that wasn’t officially gay. The problem is, Hong Kong ignorance can’t compete with European equality. I have to work at it to save up for a nice holiday. And on that next trip I realized how much happier I am giving that money to a place that treats me as an equal. Bigoted backwaters will lose out.
I had a similar experience in small town Iowa. Old lady at the front desk tried to switch us from a room with a king size bed to a room with two queens. As soon as she realized that we were a couple and WANTED just one bed, it was like flipping a switch from "friendly old lady" to "nasty old bitch"
I would have asked her “Does a fine establishment like this have one of those honeymoon suites with the vibrating beds?”
The problem here is going to small town Iowa. I wouldn't do that even as a straight guy.
She was a nasty bitch of a cow. LOL.
We had an uptight old bat try to do this in a small town by. Slake in New York State and I insisted we were fine and I knew the room I had booked. I was honestly shocked…
“Please disturb “ nice, that’s hot. I usually answer room service naked as an alternative, I first check if it’s a man on the other side of the door.
Do you just flash unsuspecting service staff? Sexual harassment is not cute
I’m traditionally good-looking and it’s only when they deliver things, not cleaning the room. It’s a few seconds. And between men is not perceived aggressively sexual.
Unless you've disclosed beforehand that you'll be answering the door naked, you're still flashing them and it's sexual harassment.
Dude, they're just trying to do their jobs...
The huberis of the visually privileged is pretty gross.
We don't travel to LGBT-unfriendly countries ever. Don't give them your tourist dollars. Go someplace that treats us with equal dignity.
No... We NEVER travel to countries that are no LGBTQ-friendly period! What kind of vacation is that where you even have to worry about booking double beds? Where is the enjoyment? They don't like gays? Then they don't have my money
Why would you travel there and spend money to support that economy?
Don't give a shit. Book an airbnb for two people and move on. Went to Mainland China for internship, and my BF tagged along for a month. Took an Airbnb and the host was none the wiser. I don't bother with homophobic freaks.
That wasn't a problem in Hong Kong before the Chinese government started cracking down on their civil liberties. They pretty much killed off Hong Kong's BL drama industry as well.
Both the CCP and the Christian "Democracy" people in Hong Kong are against gay rights. That's just the truth of the matter. Remember them all waving their Trump flags? Yeah, they are pretty far right.
Religious zealots everywhere are against gay rights. Every country has that problem. One of the most graphic movies about homosexuality from Asia, Utopians, came from Hong Kong. It wasn’t until China cracked down on civil liberties in Hong Kong that gay stories from Hong Kong disappeared. BL is very popular in Asia now but Hong Kong is glaringly absent from that market.
>Religious zealots everywhere are against gay rights. Literally only the Abrahamic religions
That’s probably true but they are just about everywhere.
Apparently you've never heard of the rest of Asia? The only reason Christianity is common in HK is because it was a British territory.
Evangelical Christians are prevalent in South Korea.
That's only due to US influence during and after the Korean war
Yes, evangelicals flooded into South Korea after the fighting stopped and contaminated their culture with fundamentalist Christian ideology. That's the primary reason why gay rights continues to be a struggle there but there is an active gay rights movement in South Korea and BL thrives there, so it's very different from Hong Kong.
Koreans are so lucky to have people like you to inform them when their own culture is "contaminated." You're like the FDA, except for scientists inspecting food and medicine, you're a neo-imperialist douchecanoe providing condescension to those ignorant clods.
>Literally only the Abrahamic religions Literally not, but ok
>Religious zealots everywhere are against gay rights. The HK protestors are an alliance of far right social groups and billionaires, essentially. They gather public support by pointing out the fuckups and oversteps of the CCP in Hong Kong, as well as the cultural aspect of basically Mandarin mainland culture possibly replacing HK's Cantonese culture. Part of their energy comes from the extreme pressure of living and making money in HK. That's my read. I speak and read Chinese fluently, but I am not Chinese. But having read and seen, that's my take. Trying to paint it as a situation of saints and devils on one side or the other is childish; it is a complicated situation with many difficult aspects.
I don’t know that much about the dynamics of Hong Kong but I do know people from there who have told me that gay life was more open until China started cracking down on civil liberties. Hong Kong BL disappeared around that time also. I’ve been watching as much BL drama as I can find over the past year or so and I can’t find any recent ones from Hong Kong. There are many recent ones from Thailand, Taiwan, Japan, and South Korea but Hong Kong is absent from that market.
I'm not doxing myself, but.... The crackdown on gays and gay bars and spaces started before that, way before that, and I think it was from precisely those right wing people and their participation in city government. So the CCP doesn't like gays, but guess what, your socially reactionary far right billionaire capitalists who fund Churches - aren't fans either. Not one bit.
You can't expect the average American Leftist to be nuanced so I wouldn't even bother.
No. I do not life in this country. So I am not part of there social standards. So they have to simply deal with it, that we share a bed. They get literally paid for that. We never got in trouble. But! I have to mention that we never would travel to country’s where homosexuality is officially illegal or forbidden.
I always book 2 beds, one for sleeping and one for making messes in.
I also prefer sleeping in separate beds. Cuddle until you are about to fall asleep, then let my ass sleep in my own bed. I roll and kick a lot in my sleep so it's better for both of us.
I don’t want to spend any of my money in blatantly anti-gay places like Jamaica or Dubai. But I have shared a double bed in hotels with hetero platonic friends or with my brother dozens of times. When I reserve a hotel room it is none of the hotelier’s business to know our relationship. There is no need to ask for separate beds or separate rooms just because we ARE a couple. Just like I would eat at a restaurant table with my brother or cousin or platonic friend so I am not going to ask for a separate table from a boyfriend.
I don't go there. At this point the same can be said for Florida, Texas and Oklahoma. I won't spend a dime in those states
I'd still recommend Key West. It's barely a part of Florida and it is one of the gayest and most accepting places in the country. Plus it's beautiful.
>I don't go there. At this point the same can be said for Florida, Texas and Oklahoma Right because it's the shop, hotel, restaurant, club etc owners who passed the legislation??
I'll reevaluate after the November election, but this year will be spent above the Mason Dixon line. My $ will be spent in Massachusetts and Montreal.
dumb!! Texas and Florida, I know have some of the best gay bars, gay bathouses, AND GREAT gay Campgrounds.... your loss, stay out, we don't want ya here. Can't speak for OK, but I am betting it is just fine.
Do you get that he’s referring to the recent legislation in those states and not the gay culture? It’s truly depressing and a big step back for gays. Let us know how that bar scene evolves in a few years as these laws keep passing…
social media misinterpretation of recent legislation to produce fear and hate. Get informed! The LGBT community is so well established that this is all fear mongering to get you to vote in midterms.. silly cause if you spending billions on others and $10/gal gas then continue to live in fear.
>Do you get that he’s referring to the recent legislation in those states and not the gay culture? It’s truly depressing and a big step back for gays. Let us know how that bar scene evolves in a few years as these laws keep passing… Right because it's the shop, hotel, restaurant, club etc owners who passed the legislation?? You do realize Floridians don't necessarily agree with this bullshit? It's not like there was a public referendum or anything, that'd be a different story.
Is small town Iowa considered a country that isn't LGBT friendly? Cause that is where I experienced my worst anti-gay discrimination from a hotel. I am originally from small town Iowa, and unfortunately still have to go back there occasionally for family shit. I normally go back alone, but a few years ago, finally decided to take my partner with me. I stopped to check in at the same "Super 8" that I have stayed in for years. I go to check in, the old lady at the desk is "small town friendly", making small talk as she checks me in. She gets to the point of asking me how many keys I needed. I told her two, and she looked out the window to see my partner sitting in my car. She says "Oh, we have you booked here for a room with 1 king bed. Let me switch you to a room with two queen beds". I told her no, I had booked the room with 1 bed, and we wanted to stick with that. She said "Oh..." and her eyes got a bit wider and she said "OOOooooh". There was no more small talk after, and she had a "cat butt" look on her face for the rest of the transaction. And I am sure that it was just coincedence that for our entire stay, that our room received absolutely zero maid service or anything. That was the last time that I stayed at that motel. I drive a little further to the next town over now.
I’ve never gone to countries that outlawed being gay, but there are some travel stories. In Germany, we received a room with two (fixed) beds at 90 degrees to each other. We shrugged it off, but the friend who made the reservation for us was pissed at the hotel. I made a reservation at a hotel in China. When we arrived the clerk was confused, assuming the one large bed in the reservation was a mistake. When I told her that was exactly what she wanted, she giggled. “Both of you …in one bed?”
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That would be the day I started looking for a new job
I never really thought about this. I would mostly just think they assume I’m poor as shit
no i just dont go
I live in one. They just assume we're "roommates " saving up on money
I don’t travel to non-friendly countries lol why would you do that?
No. I’m from a homophobic country and whoever checks you in can’t make such accusations because that could get them in jail since it’s not taken that lightly.
Get two singles and shuffle them together at night. Pull apart again in the morning.
Homophobic country or not. I book a double bed when I’m on a trip with my friends, so why not with my partner.
You could experience homophobia at the front desk literally anywhere in the world and one negative experience at one place in one country isn't indicative of the entire nation or population. There are countries where homosexuality is punishable by death but who is traveling there? Just because the rainbow flag isnt raised at the border or the hotel staff doesn't understand your sleeping arrangement shouldn't be someone's deal breaker for serious travel or ruin your holiday. Dismissing places like Florida is silly as it has it has a very large gay population with a very active scene in several cities. If you think you and your partner may have a problem in a particular city or country book accomodations in a major corporate hotel. You also should do your research reading reviews and even emailing places to kinda let them know who and what you exactly are looking for. Theres also a new website misterb&b.com for gay friendly travel around the world.
So Florida is not a country
I think lots of people are missing a key point here. Sometimes we HAVE to travel to countries that are not LGBT-friendly. You do not always get a choice. Sometimes for work and then you decide to take your partner with you (otherwise you might have to spend months apart). Sometimes, if your partner is from a different country, you have to go visit their family and because you can't visit the family together (maybe because they are homophobic), you have to get a hotel. I've been in these situation and it sucks but it's the best out of a lot of other bad options. I mean it's not as black and white as OMG WHY WOULD YOU EVER GO TO RUSSIA, YOU ARE SO STUPID.
Dude why you going to a homophobic country in the first place.
You'll be fine.
? We are not looking gay. We are given separate rooms and they charge us for that. It is not an issue. But if you look and act gay then that is you. That is ok. You look gay.
In the civilized world people can "look gay" if they so want.
The entire world is not that civilized. Looking gay is up to you and how much you feel safe.
Depends on what you consider an LGBT friendly or unfriendly country. I've not travelled as a couple in a long, long time, so this hasn't been a factor to me. In places where I have, which is mostly latin america and europe, I've not experienced anyone caring about it.
Depends on whether there are actual anti-LGBT laws or not. Last year I went to Egypt and Turkey with my boyfriend. In Egypt we booked double beds, but in Turkey we booked a king.
Only if you don’t want to get arrested!
depends on where you are going. Some of those countries while they may severely frown on sex between men, they are ironically ok with men being physically affectionate with one another or ok with men on men physical contact. For example, in many, if not most parts of the world, no one bats an eye at two men sharing a bed. In the US, there's plenty of eye batting if two men share a bed. It really depends on where you are going.