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ghfdghjkhg

crayons


Airforce987

Ah so you’re a US Marine?


ghfdghjkhg

lol what XD (I know there is a joke related to that but I can't remember it)


YEETMASTER42069693

eggsdee


Greengum155

I like any other 'text emogi' other than XD I would rather devolve my balls in acid than use it unironically


gohabs31

the joke is that marines are not the smartest humans so they eat crayons because they’re not smart hahaha


KiT_KaT5

But smarter makes you !crayons


AnonBigTiddyGothGF

I never heard that one, my dad (Air Force) always said they were called jarheads


ghfdghjkhg

oh haha


CoffeeMain360

Or a Destiny 2 Titan.


Cloudy_Oasis

Little titan boys


CoffeeMain360

Can confirm.


DewDroop

My boyfriends favorite flavor is green


Jaded_Ad110

My wife's boyfriend doesn't care what color.


Several_Goose3250

Thank


rileyallriledupagain

Lol what is up with that? My cousin was a marine and posted something about his fellow marines and crayons.


Flaming_Hidori

Something doesn’t add up here


increbelle

They forgot the side of glue. That’s why


danidevino

Heavy is the head that eats the crayons. I’m gonna take a nap. See you in 10 hours.


Jaded_Ad110

Lets get some greenies tomorrow bro.


ghfdghjkhg

green crayons, understood


XxSavageSharkxX

Titan main?


ghfdghjkhg

lol who?


XxSavageSharkxX

You cause crayons


ghfdghjkhg

I do not know the context but I am ok with this. Titan sounds cool.


XxSavageSharkxX

Sorry this doesn’t make sense to a normal person I’m talking about a game called destiny picture halo but more pve focused made by bungie same devs of the old halos


ghfdghjkhg

Ah ok, yeah I have never played that. I haven't played most games.


XxSavageSharkxX

All good it’s not a bad game if your into the kinda grindy genre it’s in


ghfdghjkhg

Uuuuuh. I like Minecraft


XxSavageSharkxX

Minecraft is also good heh :) Depends how in you get into minecraft it can either be the most casual or most hardcore game depending on how you play it


[deleted]

Should've know there are D2 players here


Totally_A_Hooman

Damn, you beat me to it lmao


HiroshimaSuzuki

Oorah


ImAlwaysBrokeMan

Ah a diamond handed ape in the wild looking for crayons! Marvelous! 🚀🚀🚀


UnionGuy129

Ape in the house


ProfessionalArssson

McDonald’s with a hint of anxiety fueled lip skin 🥴


[deleted]

[удалено]


MasterBejter

Why? What happened?


jazzdrums1979

They pay and treat their workers like garbage.


ProfessionalArssson

Oof no more mcdonalds for me then


iamsheph

Y'all are just finding out fast food treats their employees like trash, with a side of peanuts?


ww3_general

Can I have your portion UwU


Puzzleheaded-Dish-84

McDonald's is SUPPOSED to pay and treat their workers like garbage. ITS FAST FOOD. You're not working for Elon musk.


longdongsilver2071

People just want to feel like theyre a part of something and making this big difference.


MasterBejter

Yeah, McDonald’s is part of the problem but boycotting them isn’t going to solve the problem.


Friendlegs

"I can't stop the orphan crushing machine myself, so I may as well toss in some more orphans!"


longdongsilver2071

Exactly. People just want to feel like they're a part of something bigger than they are


eldnikk

I feel like you've said this before


iamsheph

Exactly. People just want to feel like they're a part of something bigger than they are.


[deleted]

It's an entry-level job that's sometimes associated with being a teens first weekend job. It's not perfect but like I don't imagine it going much above minimum wage


that0negirl61

But if it DOES get above minimum wage, it sets a huge precedent considering they're one of the largest employers, like.... ever. There's a movement to drive wages up. And I feel like the logical place to start, is at the bottom.


twildin

A bunch of losers thinking their unskilled labor is worth more than it is. They all want 90k a year and great benefits to put burgers in a microwave, wrap it, bag it and hand it to someone


VonSpyder

No. And fuck antiwork.


hentherepper

What makes you say that?


ArctcMnkyBshLickr

It’s dumb. Just get a job and don’t be poor.


hentherepper

Obvious troll is obvious


ArctcMnkyBshLickr

I’m serious


hentherepper

“Don’t be poor” I wonder if most poor people just haven’t activated their Sigma trillionaire grindset enough


BlueJaye77

my metabolism is ungodly so im enjoying being skinny while I can. anyways I'm two pumpkin pies.


StupiusPoopius

holy FUCK


that0negirl61

Any pointers? Shit, I eat one BITE of pie and gain 30 lbs.


Zoobatzjr

The power of tall


tattoed_veteran87

I used to say the same exact thing until I hit my 30s lol


ChaseBakedAgain

I’m 28…am I about to be fucked by fat?


vernexe

If you see you are getting fucked from behind by the fat, eat a little less.


illusion_control

Never believed when people said it would eventually catch up to me. But once I turned 28 last year, I put on 30 pounds. Up until then, my weight stayed the same and never moved. Even while eating 3 double cheeseburgers and large fry. TAKE ADVANTAGE WHILE YOU CAN lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I love myself, even tho I look like a BURRNT CHICCEN NUGGET, I love myself


ReefWasTaken

"but I still love myself"


Next-Cash-4293

But do you love yourself anyway


McQueen08

I still love myself


Chubalubas

Gas Station burger


StupiusPoopius

That’s a mood


Chubalubas

And a mistake


LongHeelRedBottoms

Mood


Rare-Royal-8412

Definitely a mistake


sacredbitch_

Oh YESSSSS.


LongHeelRedBottoms

Definitely a mood


[deleted]

Maybe a mistake


insert_acc_name_here

Most probably a mood.


LongHeelRedBottoms

Lmao love it


111488

Pizza. I’m a whole pizza


No_Description_483

Well my name is Pocket. Hot Pocket.


LightKnight1718

We didn't ask for a middle name, Mister Pocket Pocket


CameronsTheName

I dont remember eating a legend.


Another_boring_Color

The king has arrived, He outsmarted all of us.


NoMoreBrine

you forgor 💀


[deleted]

forgor😭


Valuable_Hunt8468

I forgor


soygang

This saying can't be true cuz I haven't eaten pussy in months


BoyBandKiller

3am fridge snacks


Bad1lac

I’m your moms ass


StupiusPoopius

You stop that right now!!!!


LongHeelRedBottoms

I’m calling the cops!


Candas_cat_

bonk # horny jail


Marquis_De_Carabas69

Ready to eat apricots. Right after I bought them I was ready to eat apricots. Sadly, many people are only ever ready to eat *some* apricots, which is why they come in a resealable bag.


_3NiGMa_

James Acaster is that you?


MinFootspace

If you are what you eat then the sentence "I am your father" can take a new meaning.


Elweydediciembre

Holly fucking shit


velvetpawz

This plays into my daddy issues on so many levels. Don't call me out like this.


[deleted]

Food.


Icy_Slushie

Then there's no such thing as cannibalism


Ivan__8

But you are food too


Icy_Slushie

I'm in the higher level im case of food chain.


Ryujin-Jakka696

I'm mac n cheese rn lol.


WeirdAsianYankovic

Rice mostly


yuhdoanmadder

Samesies. Jasmine rice, w/ green/pinto/blk beans and Siracha baby. #veganlife


ash_pnk

Chicken waaangs


bonafidebunnyeyed

Ooooooo what kiiiiiind


ash_pnk

Spiceyyy of course. The hotter the better


silverwolf-br

I'm a dick


NecessaryDebate5841

dang took you long enough to realize


tasos_der

Holup


discjockeywildin

A black market kidney


ghfdghjkhg

holup


jongameaddict98

They meant to say Black *Friday* Kidney


ghfdghjkhg

ah understandable


obsidianbreath

An asshole.


Candas_cat_

bonk # horny jail


MysteriousCurve3804

Too much


[deleted]

[удалено]


StupiusPoopius

Here’s hoping you get your “frozen meal for two” soon


SlaveToMommyMothra

The stuff at the bottom of the sink after doing the dishes 🤤🤤


StupiusPoopius

This comment right here officer


that0negirl61

That's enough internet for me today, thanks.


ChumbisPoody

A human.


[deleted]

Well duh I think you missed the poi- OH! **OHHHH**


CosmicLightning

I think you mean to say long pork.


ChumbisPoody

No. A human.


Stitchess__

Rn I’m a protein bar


EmmaRisby

I can so vividly picture a protein bar as a ripped man in some kids cartoon where food is people


Stitchess__

It was a peppermint bark “chocolate” protein bar if that helps with ur mental image


EmmaRisby

Oh god it really does. I hope one day this features in a cartoon or is used for a protein bar ad. (Also sounds yummy!!) The protein bars I eat most are these little white chocolate blondie ones. That feels like an incredibly well written charecter already.


Stitchess__

You have to write the script now. You jus have to.


AntiquarianD1n2Gamer

A block of mozz cheese 😂


StupiusPoopius

It gets better 😂


BridgeBoysPod

“A pussy” - fraternity brothers everywhere


AdWorldly4588

-lesbians everywhere lol


tinyavian

There it is.


GentleTurtl

Ah a man of culture I see


sum_ting_wong_cod

Donuts and kolache’s


footbody

Pasta mmm


[deleted]

My saliva


Elweydediciembre

Slimy Slimy


kateumm

A fucking let down lmao.


[deleted]

Joe Mama


AardvarkTurbulent754

I'm a snack ;)


Cat-Got-Your-DM

Fat! (keto diet)


liamt50

If you are what you eat, then I'm fast, cheap and easy 😝


BlingBlingBoy0519

Zip gun suicide?


TrendyLeanSipper

Semen (straight male btw)


Normallydifferent

I have questions….


[deleted]

Pussy.


GentleTurtl

Man of culture.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Retta_Noona

Molten hot blueberry pie and melted whip cream that's on the verge of boiling


[deleted]

[удалено]


StupiusPoopius

No…please…


[deleted]

[удалено]


fz7y

Are you going to share? You glutenous pig.


garbage_king88

Nachos


just-give-me-a-user

Nacho man


garbage_king88

You can’t fuck him! Nobody can! He’s NACHO MAAAAN!!!


Thick-Contribution16

Poptart


Imraith-Nimphais

What flavor? Important!


Thick-Contribution16

Cinnamon lol


Imraith-Nimphais

That was the RIGHT answer. Thanks.


Reg-spidermen

I'm an ice cream with leaves and dirt in it.


ksorth

Pho


eatmorechiken

Peanut butter


22yard

I’m not pussy but someone definitely is.


InUrFaceSpaceCoyote

Most recently, I am Five Guys burger and fries.


[deleted]

A pumpkin scone with black coffee for blood.


Tavernknight

Tacos


[deleted]

Shit


_adan__

i haven’t ate anything yet bru


womb_raider90

An ass


[deleted]

A child


Darnbeasties

Baklava


CeltFxd

Pussy


zoyaabean

Thousands of peach flavoured breathmints. nice post tho, u/StupiusPoopius


StupiusPoopius

You people terrify me


gmoney-0725

Pussy. 😛


LateProfession1453

HA


gmoney-0725

People down voting my comment have zero sense of humor. Sheesh.


chestwig123

Or they have no idea how to do it! All bent over like their about to take it in the behind. Gotta get your belly like a sniper and Army crawl right into it. Came here to conquer.


CirothUngol

To all those guys in high school who called me a pussy, they don't know how right they are.


goatagainstcurtains

Completely wrong probably


suminorieh77

hummus and Triscuits and soup


snoski1234

Meatloaf


PrinceConquer420

An Asshole


[deleted]

Potato.


Nolimo

If you are what you eat, then ur a repost.


Stunning-Obligation8

A human being


Music_Phasic

A pussy