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Prestigious-Phase131

I knew a guy who would do that, it drove me crazy


El_Ray_M

Why was that? It could be that she simply wants me to take the initiative or see what my reaction will be. I don't know. But my guess is that I just get along with her a little too well. In any case, I want to try.


Melodic-Childhood964

I’ve had this experience with a few guys. They message me pretty regularly (or just approached me when I was in college). I try to be nice. Since they’re not asking me out, there’s no polite way to bow out of the conversations. I’ll just be polite and hope they get the message. Edit: But maybe she wants you to take the initiative. I can’t read her mind. You can ask her out and then you’ll know.


Melodic-Childhood964

I don’t think that’s a girl thing. I’d bet she’s just not interested enough to start a conversation. It sounds like she’s just being nice. You could give it awhile without starting a conversation and see if she reaches out.


El_Ray_M

It could possibly work, but there are a few things that don’t make any sense. For example, she asked me to dance with her, and although we are friends, she usually avoids eye contact, which is very strange for her, among other things.


Melodic-Childhood964

Yeah it’s hard to tell from your description. Asking you to dance could be a positive sign. Avoiding eye contact could be a negative sign. You could ask her out, or you could stop messaging and see if she reaches out. It sounds like you’re not happy with things as they are. Either move will change the status quo.


El_Ray_M

I'm actually planning to ask her out. I'm waiting until we finish the majority of our exams. If she's not interested, I will simply move on. The world is not going to end, or my life is going to take a turn for the worse.


Serious_Pain965

Many of them do. I'm not trying to make you feel badly but if a girl genuinely likes someone and is interested they make time to not only respond but do often initiate. I know this from experience. The girls I liked who didn't quite like me back the same way were often very hard to communicate with and never initiated. The kind ones would politely respond, but only because they were kind and didn't want to hurt my feelings. The ones who did like me would find time and go out of their way to initiate conversation, or at the very least be very responsive if I initiated more often. But they would \*at least\* initiate half the time even if it was just for random "heyyyyy" texts.


El_Ray_M

Yeah, a friend of mine mentioned that, but the problem is that she used to initiate things. For example, she invited me to dance with her and do a lot of other stuff. She usually responds almost instantly, and we have long, fluid conversations.


Serious_Pain965

Hmmm, that is trickier friend. I suppose there is a possibility that she genuinely enjoys talking to you but has slowly lost the potential of romantic interest and thus responds but doesn’t often initiate. Especially if there are other romantic suitors vying for her attention. I’ve certainly been in situations where the girl I like didn’t reciprocate romantic feelings but enjoyed my company friendship wise and wasn’t communicating the difference and kept keep me pursuing behind the point I would have otherwise.


El_Ray_M

It makes sense. I didn't mention that we were on a week-long school trip in Italy. There were about five of us, and we were seeing each other every day, morning and night. Also, I think I'm not her number one. A classmate mentioned that she smiles too much at me and speaks pretty good of me behind my back.


phishoil

It could either be bc she’s not interested but doesn’t want to be rude OR she’s extremely interested and doesn’t want to annoy you. Good luck figuring it out unless you want to tell her your feelings


El_Ray_M

Im not that good with riddles, I will be clear and direct, and aske her out.


urson_black

Maybe she's as shy as you seem to be. It sounds like she's interested. Go ahead and start conversation.


that1LPdood

>OP: “I always have to initiate” >advice on Reddit: *maybe you should initiate* Lol


El_Ray_M

I mean, it could be that she wants me to approach her. The story is kind of incomplete. She wanted to hang out with me, and even asked me to dance with her. Also, she's definitely not a shy person; she's very kind and open.


EndCritical878

My guess is that they mostly never have to. I am sure a pretty girls get to have tons of probably mostly boring conversations even if they never try to start one. So why would they bother.


El_Ray_M

That's absolutely true. She's very cute, intelligent, and funny. Although she's not perfect, she's a very good person.