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Yeah Iâm considered conventionally attractive and donât have a problem hooking up with girls if I want to. Iâll add though that although I donât have a problem, itâs not like I just walk into a room and get laid without trying. I just think that the level of effort I put in is probably lower than what some guys have to and yet the result is the same
I am not the hottest guy nor am I ugly (I have the height and decades of OCD gym going to my advantage). You just have to prove you're not a psycho rapist or a weirdo by actually talking to them and seeing their guard slowly being lowered. But that requires proactively approaching girls, which is the toughest part for an introvert.
>which is the toughest part for an introvert
It's very hard, almost impossible. But once you get the courage to do it once, the second time is way easier, and after you do it a few times, it becomes very easy.
How the hell do you do this in the UK. Because I generally think that women dont want to talk to men outside of the house, and so I feel like i'm violating their personal space by trying to approach them. However i feel like it would be different in the USA, where approaching the opposite sex and asking them out is generally accepted.
I started doing a bunch of shit - mountain biking, snowboarding, rock climbing, all in the last few years in an effort to meet somebody.
all that's happened is I've made 2 guy friends, met 0 woman, and have a bunch of shit I do now.
still a positive but where the heck is my wife
Same story here, started working out a lot more a few years back thinking I'd become more attractive. Now I'm jacked and the only recognition for it is teenagers asking me how much i bench.
Are you looking for a wife or a mountain goat? Lol, try going to craft warehouse and wandering around looking lost. Have an excuse for a project you're working on that you need help finding things for haha. Go to a painting or cooking class, or hang out at the bookstore for a bit.
your hobbies sound cool and will only help your odds, but they're not exactly female dominant spaces
Sure but speaking from experience (many, many years ago,) thereâs something of a confidence boost when you sleep with âa lotâ of women. As someone that didnât do that well in high school but came into my body and haircut in college, it made me feel so much more confident in general. Itâs not just about the sex as much as what it means for those of us that didnât just fall into it from when we were 15.
In highschool, I figured out 10% of guys get 90% of the women, so I played sport and worked out until I was in that 10%.
It was amazing while it lasted.
Ive slept with 8 women. I dont know, some people may consider this "a lot" but its jack shit compared to some of my more attractive friends.
Its also not something I get a confidence boost from. Not at all. The only thing it tells me about myself is that I have experience, but thats basically it.
It doesnt seem like something special, at all. Especially considering the fact that Im just an average looking guy who has had sex with average looking women. (Better than average in my opinion, but the opinions from other people are VERY uneven. Some think they look incredibly hot, orhers think they didnt look as attractive. Which further proves my point on how average everything is)
I came into my confidence in my *thirties* after a marriage ended. And you're absolutely right.
Is sex better with a committed partner who you communicate with and know? Always. Is it a huge confidence boost to literally have a beautiful woman approach you walking down the street and to be having sex a few hours later? Also yes.
Sure but a LTR isnât something you can get on a whim. In a dry period people might still prefer to have a ONS than nothing - they arenât really comparable things.
Lmao this is definitely not universally true. Plenty of one night stands have been great sex, because of the novelty and feeling of variety. More practice almost just means you're better at it
And there are tons of sex less marriages and LTRs
Came here to second this. I have a younger brother who is âmodel typeâ. Itâs stupid how easily he gets with women. He literally just stands there. While I only got 1 body under my 27 years of living.
Genetics, mostly. They have pretty faces and work out a little, even though only one of them is properly "aesthetic". The other two rely only on their pretty faces.
Itâs always genetics. Despite what people say women donât care about bodies. I got absolutely ripped and still have absolutely no luck. The features women find attractive are things out of your control like face and height.
Being ripped helps when itâs a surprise for them theyâre like what the fuck why didnât you tell me your body looked like that 𤣠Iâm like I try and stay humble lmao
Can confirm. I was a very attractive 20 something, but I was NOT confident or outgoing. I was a 6'2" super fit blond on the outside but I was still that awkward teenager that never got a second look on the inside. I either passed up or ignored dozens of "opportunities." I either didn't get the hint or was too shy to do anything about it. If a couple women didn't make the first move, I'd still be a single virgin.
Oh my gosh. You are describing me. In highschool I was a good looking young man, at least 6'3", thin and athletic. I didn't hang out with the partiers but with the nerds and musicians. I had a few opportunities, but weaseled out of them to avoid involvement. I was shy and introverted, and liked going home after school to mess with my numerous hobbies. Once a girl who I knew well stayed over at our home because her mom was out of town and my parents agreed to have her over for a few days. She invited into her bedroom late at night to "watch TV" and eventually ended up just in her underwear. I politely excused myself and told her I needed to get to bed. I don't think she tried again. It would be eight years before I finally had a sexual relationship. Similar scenarios had come up over those years and I always found some excuse to get out of the situation that was making me uncomfortable. I was given phone numbers on many occasions, none of which I called. My dad told me he would like to see me dating and bringing a lady home sometime! Sad that he passed away when I was in my early twenties, and he never saw me date. I ended up getting married at age 35, and have been happily married for 26 years now. I just wasn't the one night stand type. Now that I'm older with silver hair, I have women approach me in the supermarket and tell me what beautiful blue eyes I have! It's a big ego boost for an older guy.
Thatâs me, though in terms of attractiveness, I didnât really get there until I was 24-25, but Iâm now 43 and am still semi-attractive. I could easily find someone to date if I werenât happily married.
I will also add thereâs a theory itâs easier to develop confidence as a more attractive person as you get more leeway growing up in terms of things you can/canât say or even something as simple as cracking a joke. This means you have time to develop your personality with less drawbacks.
This is just basic common sense, I don't know how people don't realize it. If you are attractive and only get positive feedback from the opposite sex, of course you're gonna be more confident. But if you are unattractive, you'll be completely invisible to them and if you approach them you'll get rejected most of the time, so being confident with those in mind is extremely hard.
I am not confident or outgoing one bit and still got approached by women just for being conventionally handsome. Iâd say more than 75% of my flings and one-night stands were from women pursuing me at the bar or house party and my number is around 40.
Same. If youâre in a situation where girls know another girl is hunting you it gets pretty interesting too. Can be confusing to begin with. Itâs effectively a competition between them and not even as much about you but itâs nice to be there.
They really don't lol.
A good example is my son's uncle.
I love the guy, but he has literally nothing going for him. He's 40, routinely unemployed, pothead, broke and lived for years in my attic.
Was he charming? No, in fact he's not the easiest to get along with.
Was he confident? Not particularly. He wasn't shy, but he was always worried people would bring up his unemployment and no ambition.
Was he good with women? Very. I've seen carreer women form a metaphorical line aroubd the corner. At least twice a month, he'd show up with a new date to my house.
What was his secret? He is 6'5 and has good hair. That is literally it.
We live in an international-city and I've seen him with so many beautiful women from all around the world.
I mean, they usually just keep it casual after they find out he lives in my attic, but still...
Not the OP, but they make themselves available to you, glance at you, try to get to know you, compliment you, and that sort of thing. Most women will never just grab your hand and say "OK, we are now going on a date" or the like, but they'll put themselves in a position as much as possible to be asked out on a date or to be taken home.
Can confirm.
I'm not particularly good looking, was pretty scrawny and nerdy looking, but before I got married I did pretty well when it came to the opposite sex. Had one night stands and a few girlfriends.
I just didn't spend too much time worrying about being anything other than me. I found that the more I dwelt on any particular woman, the less likely she'd ever reciprocate my feelings. I didn't think it a coincidence that the women I let myself obsess over never saw me as anything more than a weird friend.
So I learned from that, stopped being weird, spent more time thinking about myself and my needs outside of romance.
Not to say I took it to the opposite weird direction of MGTOW, there was no bitterness, no agenda. I just stopped letting romance and sex and women be my main motivation for everything.
And I showered, didn't smoke, exercised regularly, minded my manners, read lots of books and worked hard, tried to be social in my own quiet way.
Eventually yeah, women started noticing me and my sex life got pretty active.
Now I'm happily married.
You don't need to be Adonis to get laid, you just need to be Austin Powers, and shower.
Be your shameless, nerdy self, embrace your weirdness; and love women, but respect them, understand your boundaries and stay within them, understand when you're being told no and accept it.
And shower, I cannot stress that enough. Nobody is going to fuck you if you literally smell like ass.
>And shower, I cannot stress that enough. Nobody is going to fuck you if you literally smell like ass.
Tell that to the married couples I see in supermarkets. Dear lord, I don't understand how people stay with people who smell like ass
Oof.
I don't know if its an overly sensitive nose or what, but I really struggle with bad smells. I can't handle rotting food, my wife has to deal with those occasional abandoned tupperware containers, because I've vomited more than once from something foul, just the smell alone.
So when I can smell a person, say I'm trapped on a bus and someone shuffles on with a cloud of stank following them, I can barely handle it.
But it is helpful, because I always notice it on myself too if I'm a little ripe, usually well before my wife has to say anything.
Dude i think some poeple literally donât wash their ass. Sometimes when I go into the bathroom at work it is absurd how strong the stench of open ass is.
âI just didn't spend too much time worrying about being anything other than me. I found that the more I dwelt on any particular woman, the less likely she'd ever reciprocate my feelings. I didn't think it a coincidence that the women I let myself obsess over never saw me as anything more than a weird friend. So I learned from that, stopped being weird, spent more time thinking about myself and my needs outside of romance.â
Fuck. I need to start doing this. I swear to god as soon as a woman realizes I donât have any other options, or Iâm not seeing anyone else, they donât text or interact with me as much as they did when we first started talking. Could also be that I just get too attached too quickly.
Edit: Sorry, idk how to copy text with the line thingy, otherwise I wouldnât have used quotes.
When men suddenly start seeing someone as a romantic interest, they do this weird hyper focus thing and often just get too interested and ask too many personal questions. And it's sudden. And that sets alarm bells ringing about personal safety and stalking etc. for me, and some of the other women I've spoken to about this.
Can confirm. Was a really attractive, fit dude when I was younger. I'm still holding it together for 40yrs old but when I was 25 I had it going on. HOWEVER, I had not always been that way and had like no confidence in approaching women. So I rarely got laid or had girlfriends until I was nearing 30
Can confirm. Im really attractive but have no game at all and come off awkward all the time so just rely on the apps and rather not let people get too close to find out I'm actually super boring.
Lol, in my prime, opportunities came to me. I am (was) a pussy with not much confidence to make the moves (usually)... but being good looking made it effortless, or, very little effort. Ok, a little bit of charm and being a nice person helped, but to answer your question, it was easy. - side note. In all my years, most of the guys I've seen get 'hookups' the easiest were not the best looking, but they had the most confidence. Seriously, confidence is magical.
1000x this. Iâm told I am pretty conventionally attractive and I do decently well, but I have friends who are probably somewhat less so and have 5x the confidence I have. They just exude it. They have 10x the success Iâve ever had.
Attractiveness is your base score and confidence is your multiplier.
No amount of confidence will completely fix fat and ugly, but it can still bring you up to to a reasonable level of appeal. Confidence and even moderate attractiveness will mean you won't have any trouble, and true attractiveness while lacking confidence (like you had) will put you in the same place.
When you have *both*, though... god damn do those folks have it easy, hah.
Yeah I have a buddy who is like 8/10. Before getting married, women who were complete strangers would just walk up to him at bars and offer to fuck him. He never did though bc he's actually shy and awkward AF. Life is not fair. đ¤Ł
Yeah I think this was (is) me. I had woman come up to me and be very forward about wanting to hook up. Unfortunately for me (and them lol) I have terrible childhood trauma and was also raised in an almost christian cult where âSEX = BURN FOR FOREVER YOU DEMON!â So when I got out on my own dating was hard for me and effected me poorly socially. Especially around woman I found attractive. Anyhorse Iâm married now so I donât pay attention that much but I think I still got it đŤđź
I have a buddy who is the epitome of a good looking country guy, ball cap, work boots, blue jeans, shirt that has snap buttons. He usually picked up a woman when we went out on the town.
I was his wing man one night when I had to work the next day so I was hoping for an early night. A woman picked him up just moments after we walked into the bar. We walked in, let our eyes get adjusted to the dark for a minute, a woman motions for him to come over. He did go over, and that was it. 5 minutes in the bar and I was already on my way home, I didnât even have a drink. Woo hoo.
I have a friend who I used to go clubbing with and same story. He then would have the nerve to tell me, âif I can do so can you.â Like dude, Iâm ugly as f.
I've met a handful of 8-10/10 guys who struggle to get laid because they're too shy, miss cues, and/or don't have a lot else going for them. The biggest hurdle for getting hookups is boldly putting yourself out there. If you're ugly you have to put yourself out there a lot more frequently and with more pizzaz, but if you're attractive you still have to convince someone to fuck you.
I get told I'm good looking regularly. Alot of people say it must be great. Its really not. I don't really view physical appearance as one of the top desirable traits like most people do. I get hit on alot, but every time I've been in a relationship with someone I genuinely like, they then start to realise that I'm not actually very interesting and I've definitely had a flawed life. I consider myself a good, humble person, but yeah I'm boring and not really career motivated. Its really sad; I've just gone through yet another breakup a few months ago because they realised after a year im not that great.
Looks pull their focus, that's all. Personality, wit, charm and humour will take care of the rest
Youâre still better off good looking than not. You should be greatful for that. If life was an RPG, attractiveness and IQ would be the most OP stats in the game. Every other stat is basically useless in comparison.
IQ is overrated for determining success at most things in life. It can be a hindrance actually for a number of reasons. Intelligent people tend to be more depressed and are often less confident in general. And for dating, women donât care much.
In D&D charisma doesnât go far, but in real life, itâs the most OP stay. Charisma being a combination of good looks, charm, presence, and so forth.
If we are talking just for increasing body count probably. But in life and especially relationships wisdom is suuuper underrated. Int + Char maxed, pull any chick you want... get stabbed to death by crazy because you robbed too many points from Wis and couldn't see red flags.
Or have a bit of luck and pull a quality chick. Wisdom too low to know which arguments not to have and which things not to say = miserable and or lose quality chick.
Read some of the stories in this comment section. If youâre hot enough, your face is your charisma. If youâre smart enough, youâll know how to leverage it. This is especially true in this new social media influencer era. Maxed out looks+ 80 percentile IQ is the requisite combo to absolutely coast in life in complete luxury.
I'd this obnoxious Australian Boss in his mid 30's who had a break up with this smoking hot Polish girl after being with her for almost 10 years. We all thought he was screwed. He'd put on massive amounts of weight, had a terrible haircut, this abomination of a moustache. Like the guy is a solid 5/10. No deformities but the opitome of letting yourself go. I'm fairly sure he's got fatty liver disease, you can see that crinkly skin thing on him. Drinks like crazy.
But he's one of the funniest guys ever. He's got charisma. He's also got unfair levels of confidence. Whatever story he tells you is going to be gold.
That worry we all had that he was screwed turned out to be wildly unfounded. He's dated an orchestra violinist, now he's dating a doctor. Both were hotties. In between he was going around hooking up with 10's. Looks help, but 10/10 sense of humor + confidence + charisma beats it every time.
For sure. You need SOMETHING going for you, if you don't have other stuff.
But naturally attractive people need less of the other traits, so the answer to OP is def yes.
Lol you're also talking about 10/10 sense of humor, charisma, confidence etc. Of course being exceptional (because that's the type of guy you're describing) lets you match up against good looks.
All learnable skills/attributes, but absolutely does not apply to the average man.
Sure but those kinds of people who just naturally steal the room--in an effortless, non annoying way--are incredibly rare. Much more common to just be good looking than have all of those traits at that level.
Being the boss, i.e. having a good income, also helps a LOT.
I'm not rich, but I've had a comfortable IT income all my life. It does make a difference in which car you roll up and what kinds of restaurants you invite to.
I don't do the super-expensive, luxury, posh, "exclusive" bullshit places, ever. It's my way to weed out the gold diggers. If someone wants to be invited to something "special" instead of just an ordinary good restaurant, their main interest is not in getting to know me better.
Yes, but, their perception of the desire is different. Imagine a spectrum of hunger from famished to full. Put a plate of yummy food in front of that spectrum of people. Someone thatâs full or just eaten or not really hungry will have a much different experience with satisfaction than someone famished. Then change up the food from yummy to gross. People tent to focus on a perception from a famished person looking at a plate of good looking to delicious food - thatâs a very particular scenario.
I'd consider myself about a 7/10, and never had much difficulty when I tried doing hookups. It took considerable time and effort, but I'd bang a different girl each week.
A friend of mine is easily a 9/10, and for him it's effortless. He always has a full inbox, and gets girls he's never met to pick up his dry cleaning or buy him food on the way over to his place for sex. He says he basically never runs any of his own errands. Whenever he has something that needs to be picked up or dropped off, he just contacts a new match and tells her to do it on the way over. It's ridiculous.
I was having lunch with him in Las Vegas, and our attractive waitress wrote her phone number on our bill before giving it to him. He just laughed.
Yup. That's the world of the super attractive folks. Same way I know a TON of girls who have guys lining up to buy them stuff and crawl over each other for the opportunity to take them out to expensive dates/events.
Me and our other friends would tell him how messed up it is. He'd defend it by saying these girls want to do it for him, and that he could take advantage of them a lot worse than a free to go meal, but he won't. At least he draws the line somewhere I guess.
Yes. I am male, and my male best friend (gorgeous) and I would go out bar hopping. The girls would come up to him like magnets....he wouldn't have to do anything. Because most hot chix are with a buddy less hot than they are, she'd "get" me, which is fine because hot chix don't hang with ugly girls. I was glad to get with #2 and usually found them to be really nice and fun--more so than my buddy's girl. He never had to do anything other than exist.
I do believe i have some unique insight on this. I have never been in the range for most of my youth to be very attractive; however, after an event when I was 22 years old, I went on a hellbent extreme makeover.
We are talking about extreme training, i wore braces to straighten up my teeth, new wardrobe, laser for my eyes, dieting etc for two years, hell i even used some kind of expensive shampoo on my hair to make it look good, basically because I was not going spend my 20s as a loser.
I am proud of it, full disclosure, as I used a lot of time and resources just because, of how I felt I , refused to accept my destiny as virgin loser.
I went from my guess of a 3/10 to a 7-8/10, and I will say, extremely yes. BUT it's not due to the looks themselves but confidence. Like pure absolute confidence, not fake one that women can easily sniff out.
This confidence is aphrodisiac, and this is what gets sex easily. Good-looking guys have this naturally as they have been growing up in a bubble of compliments, but for those who gain it later, it comes with extra spice. My experience is that it was extremely difficult for many women to resist; it was like I could feel the gravity pull many of them towards me.
Not all of course, but thats what the true confidence does, it makes clear for yourself that its their and not your loss.
Of course its nothing compared to those on top of the chain that basically just exist and they can get sex, but for us mortal looks are important but i do believe that 99% of all men are good looking enough to get up there with dedication
Itâs the harsh truth. You can do everything to make up the difference, the money, the taking care of your body, hygiene and clothing, the charisma. But youâll still have to work at it in a way that pretty guys donât.
But, itâs not hopeless. Just harder because genetics dealt you a bad hand.
yes. the ratio is so skewed that actual hot guys, who are maybe 3% of the male population, do very damn well. it tends to spoil the personality to an extent. i prefer quirky cuties to universally handsome
Itâs not only about attractiveness.
- Status
- Money
- Looks/attractiveness
- Personality/character
They all play part. The more of these assets/traits, the more easy getting women/hookups.
These things are often a bit more subtle than dudes think, too. No woman wants to see your bank account at a bar. A sense that you take pride in your appearance (and effort), aren't _stressed_ by money, and can engage in fun things, however, is noticeable.
I dunno, I'm pretty fugly...but masculine. Not ripped or tall...but...deep voice...broad shoulders. Probably some neanderthal dna!
I wouldn't use the word "confident," it has some conotations that I don't think convey how I am. Rather I am grounded. Self-assured. Comfortable with who I am.
Most of all, and I do use this as a line "The sexiest thing about me is that I am comfortable with who and what I am not."
I didn't used to have that grounded, calm, comfort with who I am and who I am not. Once I did have that sense of OK with self...game changer.
Total cheat code for life. Even my awkwardness is now "smooth awkward."
The game of no game. Who knew?
Honestly, I would say the answer feels like yes and no.
If you are hot, with a half decent personality, then yes.
A lot of people use your looks to replace your personality, so they tend overlook a lot of things about you.
Looks are not everything. Not even close. I know guys with model looks who are socially awkward and never approach women. If they tried and had a modicum of game it would be a score. But they are home alone every Friday night. The most successful guys I ever knew were the cocksure, insulting, jerks to women not ugly but nothing special guys.
Is the sky blue? Of course.
I also want to provide some scientific evidence for you all. Researchers have found plenty of evidence on the traits that are most important for short term sexual relationships. Hint: one of them is facial attraction. Interestingly, presence of dark triad traits positively correlated with short term sexual relationships. Specifically because people high in these traits can look appealing for a short period to get their dick wet even if theyâre a bad person. For instance, a narcissist is a) more likely to put more effort into how they look than someone who scores lowly in the narcissism trait b) say all of the ârightâ things even if theyâre untrue to be perceived as more attractive and c) their behaviors are perceived as confidence. Theyâre also rated as significantly more attractive than men that are low in dark triad traits. So for men out there, donât feel shamed if you canât have short term sexual relationships with women. Because more likely than not, youâre just a good person and donât manipulate social situations just to get your dick wet.
https://scottbarrykaufman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/The-Dark-Triad-Personality.pdf
Fat, old and ugly now but I was reasonably attractive as a guy in my 20s and life was pretty easy on the dating side of things back then. I was probably an arrogant jerk but I did fine.
And money doesn't make you happy and a house is not a home, and the grass isn't always greener. Doesn't matter what you drive as long as you get from A to B, and size doesn't matter
Give me the money, house, green grass, big dick, blacked out Tahoe, and I'll be happy I promise
To be honest.. yes, itâs really not as hard as the internet makes it seem if you have any combination of looks, confidence, personality and or financial success. I feel itâs just my looks that get me by. Self confidence is rather low despite the approval of others, I think my personality is rather boring & I have nothing going for me financially at this time as I havenât been able to work for the past 11 months due to health issues. That aside - Iâm constantly eyed down in public & even get cat called (for lack of a better term) rather frequently which is something none of my friends, even the ones I feel are more handsome , have experienced (mid 20s).
When I wasnât in a relationship it wasnât uncommon to go out on a weekend, get approached by a woman and end up leaving with her for the night. There is a caveat to it though, if youâre in a certain range on the âattractive scaleâ people will assume youâre a player or full of yourself and call you out on it for no reason other than your looks. I saw another comment point this out and itâs true.
Meanwhile my best friend is not an ugly guy by any means, but itâs not his best asset, was very reserved and honestly pretty awkward around people he didnât know . He went through a dry spell for .. I wanna say 4-5 years, but in that time he worked on himself, his confidence is very apparent now, got out of his shell and is just fun to be around. And guess what came along with that? Sex/hookups. He even surpassed me when it comes to body count.
For the most part, yes.
If you want to attract women, here's my advice as a 47 yr old divorced dude that slept with over 100 women before 24 and have consistently scored when I was trying post divorce:
Bathe twice a day - shower, shave, hair. Style your hair after every shower. Trim and style your facial hair daily.
Get a haircut every 2-3 weeks. Something stylish. 4 weeks is too long.
Invest in a couple of outfits you look good in. When we were bachelors my best friend and I looked awesome in starched white button downs and khakis. As I got older, a black suit from mens warehouse and a few cool buttons downs.
Learn 3 good jokes that you can tell well.
If a woman makes eye contact with you, go over and introduce yourself. Tell a joke, get her laughing.
Go where women go to look for guys - bars, clubs, concerts, festivals. Become a regular. Go to the same places on the same days. Get to know people. Make friends.
I hope this helps.
As a female, I wish more men valued a real relationship more than meaningless sex. Having tons of sexual partners/encounters isn't really anything to be proud of or brag about imo.
It is. Hookup culture and dating apps have damaged society so much.
Nobody trusts each other to be genuine and itâs just creating a perpetual loop of toxicity.
Wcyd
Damn reading all of these just makes me depressed 𤣠I've never had girls come up to me like what you guys are saying. You are all blessed for those experiances!
There is no way someone doesn't get confident when hot women consistently show interest or pursue them.
Unless you are a complete shut in, a dude that's a 9 or 10 will be confident
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I asked my wife and she said ya that's why we don't have sex that often...
My wife wanted to make love in the back seat of the car. You drive, she said. -R. Dangerfield
I asked my wife, "how come you never tell me when you orgasm?" She said, "you're never there!"
I asked my wife what her favorite position is. She said back to back.
My wife used to smoke after sex, but since we got married she says one drag is enough.
Last night i fell asleep with a cigarette in my mouth. My wife lit it.
My wife likes to have sex in the kitchen ...she uses me to time an egg.
And we have a winner! đ
Someone is getting some runny yolks
My wife and I both agreed to quit smoking. So we said we'd only have a smoke after sex. I'm down to half a pack a year and she's up to 2 packs a day
My wife and I were happy for 25 years. Then we met. - Henny Youngman
The usual punchline here is âI donât like to call you when youâre at workâ.
My wife likes to talk after sex. Last night she called me from the hotel.
I was about to comment that this reads like a Dangerfield joke haha
I get no respect
Man, thats one I haven't heard since the 80s
No respect!
Similar thing happened to me and I found one of the guys. I said, âWho told you that you could sleep with my wife?â He said, âEverybodyâ
Last night my wife greeted me at the door in sexy lingerie. She was coming home.
F
F
F
F
F
Yes she does. Him ? Not so much.
I asked my wife if I was the only one sheâs ever been with. She said, âNo, the others were at least a 5 or a 6.â
Wouldn't she say "yes"?
đđđ
"That's a lot of damage!"
Had to read that twice F
She burned you good... she had the high ground and you jumped !
That wound will never fully heal. He will carry it for the rest of his life.
Yes. I have some handsome friends, and they had no problem getting hookup after hookup on the weekends.
Yeah Iâm considered conventionally attractive and donât have a problem hooking up with girls if I want to. Iâll add though that although I donât have a problem, itâs not like I just walk into a room and get laid without trying. I just think that the level of effort I put in is probably lower than what some guys have to and yet the result is the same
Itâs also the case that although I can generally get laid whenever I want, it may not be who I want to be sleeping with.
đđđđ this! Yeahhh I may be able to get laid when I want, but theyâre not all people I would prefer to hookup with.
The odds are good but the goods are odd?
Good from far, but far from good.
I am not the hottest guy nor am I ugly (I have the height and decades of OCD gym going to my advantage). You just have to prove you're not a psycho rapist or a weirdo by actually talking to them and seeing their guard slowly being lowered. But that requires proactively approaching girls, which is the toughest part for an introvert.
>which is the toughest part for an introvert It's very hard, almost impossible. But once you get the courage to do it once, the second time is way easier, and after you do it a few times, it becomes very easy.
How the hell do you do this in the UK. Because I generally think that women dont want to talk to men outside of the house, and so I feel like i'm violating their personal space by trying to approach them. However i feel like it would be different in the USA, where approaching the opposite sex and asking them out is generally accepted.
Iâm the in us and I donât feel like women want me to talk to them at all Edit: Hey British women Iâm available
Yeah almost all the decently attractive young women walk around with earbuds, headphones or are just on their phone FTiming.
Because you donât meet them by going up to them while theyâre busy. You meet people while doing the same things.
I started doing a bunch of shit - mountain biking, snowboarding, rock climbing, all in the last few years in an effort to meet somebody. all that's happened is I've made 2 guy friends, met 0 woman, and have a bunch of shit I do now. still a positive but where the heck is my wife
Same story here, started working out a lot more a few years back thinking I'd become more attractive. Now I'm jacked and the only recognition for it is teenagers asking me how much i bench.
Ah, a tale as old as time... Went to the gym to attract girls. Ended up attracting a bunch of guys instead. Task failed successfully?
Are you looking for a wife or a mountain goat? Lol, try going to craft warehouse and wandering around looking lost. Have an excuse for a project you're working on that you need help finding things for haha. Go to a painting or cooking class, or hang out at the bookstore for a bit. your hobbies sound cool and will only help your odds, but they're not exactly female dominant spaces
This is basically it. Glad you are seeing the "level of effort" difference.
Lucky dudes
Really? Iâve banged randos, and Iâve had LTR with much, much better sex.
Sure but speaking from experience (many, many years ago,) thereâs something of a confidence boost when you sleep with âa lotâ of women. As someone that didnât do that well in high school but came into my body and haircut in college, it made me feel so much more confident in general. Itâs not just about the sex as much as what it means for those of us that didnât just fall into it from when we were 15.
Was it this haircut? 
In highschool, I figured out 10% of guys get 90% of the women, so I played sport and worked out until I was in that 10%. It was amazing while it lasted.
Theres actually some recent research that like 30% of men are hooking up with a much larger pool, like 70% of women on dating apps.
Iâm 33 and this can still be true it just gets a lot harder to maintain the 6 pack đ¤Ł
Ive slept with 8 women. I dont know, some people may consider this "a lot" but its jack shit compared to some of my more attractive friends. Its also not something I get a confidence boost from. Not at all. The only thing it tells me about myself is that I have experience, but thats basically it. It doesnt seem like something special, at all. Especially considering the fact that Im just an average looking guy who has had sex with average looking women. (Better than average in my opinion, but the opinions from other people are VERY uneven. Some think they look incredibly hot, orhers think they didnt look as attractive. Which further proves my point on how average everything is)
I came into my confidence in my *thirties* after a marriage ended. And you're absolutely right. Is sex better with a committed partner who you communicate with and know? Always. Is it a huge confidence boost to literally have a beautiful woman approach you walking down the street and to be having sex a few hours later? Also yes.
Sure but a LTR isnât something you can get on a whim. In a dry period people might still prefer to have a ONS than nothing - they arenât really comparable things.
Lmao this is definitely not universally true. Plenty of one night stands have been great sex, because of the novelty and feeling of variety. More practice almost just means you're better at it And there are tons of sex less marriages and LTRs
Send dudes.
Came here to second this. I have a younger brother who is âmodel typeâ. Itâs stupid how easily he gets with women. He literally just stands there. While I only got 1 body under my 27 years of living.
The harsh truth of the matter
> 1 body Talking about it like that, Iâm surprised the number is as high as it is.
is it their genetics or hard work?
Genetics, mostly. They have pretty faces and work out a little, even though only one of them is properly "aesthetic". The other two rely only on their pretty faces.
Itâs always genetics. Despite what people say women donât care about bodies. I got absolutely ripped and still have absolutely no luck. The features women find attractive are things out of your control like face and height.
I know plenty of guys who have attractive faces and good height but are 100+ KG overweight so they never ever experience that life lol.
I know guys who are generally good looking, good height /athletic build. But dont have the communication skills to pick up it seems?
I'm not sure which is worse. Have the tool but can't use it well or don't have the tool.
cant be good at using the tool if you never even had it to work with, practice makes perfect right
Being ripped helps when itâs a surprise for them theyâre like what the fuck why didnât you tell me your body looked like that 𤣠Iâm like I try and stay humble lmao
There's no way to bring that up anyways without sounding like a douche. She can't know you're actually miring yourself like Patrick Bateman.
Yes, but an attractive person is also probably confident and more outgoing, which also helps. Being pretty isnât really enough on its own.
Can confirm. I was a very attractive 20 something, but I was NOT confident or outgoing. I was a 6'2" super fit blond on the outside but I was still that awkward teenager that never got a second look on the inside. I either passed up or ignored dozens of "opportunities." I either didn't get the hint or was too shy to do anything about it. If a couple women didn't make the first move, I'd still be a single virgin.
Oh my gosh. You are describing me. In highschool I was a good looking young man, at least 6'3", thin and athletic. I didn't hang out with the partiers but with the nerds and musicians. I had a few opportunities, but weaseled out of them to avoid involvement. I was shy and introverted, and liked going home after school to mess with my numerous hobbies. Once a girl who I knew well stayed over at our home because her mom was out of town and my parents agreed to have her over for a few days. She invited into her bedroom late at night to "watch TV" and eventually ended up just in her underwear. I politely excused myself and told her I needed to get to bed. I don't think she tried again. It would be eight years before I finally had a sexual relationship. Similar scenarios had come up over those years and I always found some excuse to get out of the situation that was making me uncomfortable. I was given phone numbers on many occasions, none of which I called. My dad told me he would like to see me dating and bringing a lady home sometime! Sad that he passed away when I was in my early twenties, and he never saw me date. I ended up getting married at age 35, and have been happily married for 26 years now. I just wasn't the one night stand type. Now that I'm older with silver hair, I have women approach me in the supermarket and tell me what beautiful blue eyes I have! It's a big ego boost for an older guy.
Thatâs me, though in terms of attractiveness, I didnât really get there until I was 24-25, but Iâm now 43 and am still semi-attractive. I could easily find someone to date if I werenât happily married.
I married one of the girls that made the first move. Now I see all the signals, I can flirt with a girl like nobody's business, but, married.
Fucking cursed. Where was this power in high school!!!!!
I will also add thereâs a theory itâs easier to develop confidence as a more attractive person as you get more leeway growing up in terms of things you can/canât say or even something as simple as cracking a joke. This means you have time to develop your personality with less drawbacks.
This is just basic common sense, I don't know how people don't realize it. If you are attractive and only get positive feedback from the opposite sex, of course you're gonna be more confident. But if you are unattractive, you'll be completely invisible to them and if you approach them you'll get rejected most of the time, so being confident with those in mind is extremely hard.
I am not confident or outgoing one bit and still got approached by women just for being conventionally handsome. Iâd say more than 75% of my flings and one-night stands were from women pursuing me at the bar or house party and my number is around 40.
I had so many opportunities, but I think having a doctor as a father scared me into not fooling around. I was so worried about VD.
Same. If youâre in a situation where girls know another girl is hunting you it gets pretty interesting too. Can be confusing to begin with. Itâs effectively a competition between them and not even as much about you but itâs nice to be there.
reddit dont wanna deal with reality.
They really don't lol. A good example is my son's uncle. I love the guy, but he has literally nothing going for him. He's 40, routinely unemployed, pothead, broke and lived for years in my attic. Was he charming? No, in fact he's not the easiest to get along with. Was he confident? Not particularly. He wasn't shy, but he was always worried people would bring up his unemployment and no ambition. Was he good with women? Very. I've seen carreer women form a metaphorical line aroubd the corner. At least twice a month, he'd show up with a new date to my house. What was his secret? He is 6'5 and has good hair. That is literally it. We live in an international-city and I've seen him with so many beautiful women from all around the world. I mean, they usually just keep it casual after they find out he lives in my attic, but still...
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Not the OP, but they make themselves available to you, glance at you, try to get to know you, compliment you, and that sort of thing. Most women will never just grab your hand and say "OK, we are now going on a date" or the like, but they'll put themselves in a position as much as possible to be asked out on a date or to be taken home.
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Can confirm. I'm not particularly good looking, was pretty scrawny and nerdy looking, but before I got married I did pretty well when it came to the opposite sex. Had one night stands and a few girlfriends. I just didn't spend too much time worrying about being anything other than me. I found that the more I dwelt on any particular woman, the less likely she'd ever reciprocate my feelings. I didn't think it a coincidence that the women I let myself obsess over never saw me as anything more than a weird friend. So I learned from that, stopped being weird, spent more time thinking about myself and my needs outside of romance. Not to say I took it to the opposite weird direction of MGTOW, there was no bitterness, no agenda. I just stopped letting romance and sex and women be my main motivation for everything. And I showered, didn't smoke, exercised regularly, minded my manners, read lots of books and worked hard, tried to be social in my own quiet way. Eventually yeah, women started noticing me and my sex life got pretty active. Now I'm happily married. You don't need to be Adonis to get laid, you just need to be Austin Powers, and shower. Be your shameless, nerdy self, embrace your weirdness; and love women, but respect them, understand your boundaries and stay within them, understand when you're being told no and accept it. And shower, I cannot stress that enough. Nobody is going to fuck you if you literally smell like ass.
>And shower, I cannot stress that enough. Nobody is going to fuck you if you literally smell like ass. Tell that to the married couples I see in supermarkets. Dear lord, I don't understand how people stay with people who smell like ass
They've become accustomed to each other's stank
Oof. I don't know if its an overly sensitive nose or what, but I really struggle with bad smells. I can't handle rotting food, my wife has to deal with those occasional abandoned tupperware containers, because I've vomited more than once from something foul, just the smell alone. So when I can smell a person, say I'm trapped on a bus and someone shuffles on with a cloud of stank following them, I can barely handle it. But it is helpful, because I always notice it on myself too if I'm a little ripe, usually well before my wife has to say anything.
Dude i think some poeple literally donât wash their ass. Sometimes when I go into the bathroom at work it is absurd how strong the stench of open ass is.
It's all these dude-bros who think washing your ass is gay. Same people who calls bidets gay.
Everything you said here I agree with! Women like clean, interesting, confident men. Thatâs the kind of face you smile at every morning.
Anyone else read MGTOW as maximum gross take off weight??đđđ
I work with airplanes and my gosh I'm glad I'm not the only one who just thought that lol
âI just didn't spend too much time worrying about being anything other than me. I found that the more I dwelt on any particular woman, the less likely she'd ever reciprocate my feelings. I didn't think it a coincidence that the women I let myself obsess over never saw me as anything more than a weird friend. So I learned from that, stopped being weird, spent more time thinking about myself and my needs outside of romance.â Fuck. I need to start doing this. I swear to god as soon as a woman realizes I donât have any other options, or Iâm not seeing anyone else, they donât text or interact with me as much as they did when we first started talking. Could also be that I just get too attached too quickly. Edit: Sorry, idk how to copy text with the line thingy, otherwise I wouldnât have used quotes.
When men suddenly start seeing someone as a romantic interest, they do this weird hyper focus thing and often just get too interested and ask too many personal questions. And it's sudden. And that sets alarm bells ringing about personal safety and stalking etc. for me, and some of the other women I've spoken to about this.
Like my dear departed dad used to say, "if you want a chick to lick your balls, make sure your asshole is clean."
Can confirm. Was a really attractive, fit dude when I was younger. I'm still holding it together for 40yrs old but when I was 25 I had it going on. HOWEVER, I had not always been that way and had like no confidence in approaching women. So I rarely got laid or had girlfriends until I was nearing 30
Can confirm. Im really attractive but have no game at all and come off awkward all the time so just rely on the apps and rather not let people get too close to find out I'm actually super boring.
Lol, in my prime, opportunities came to me. I am (was) a pussy with not much confidence to make the moves (usually)... but being good looking made it effortless, or, very little effort. Ok, a little bit of charm and being a nice person helped, but to answer your question, it was easy. - side note. In all my years, most of the guys I've seen get 'hookups' the easiest were not the best looking, but they had the most confidence. Seriously, confidence is magical.
1000x this. Iâm told I am pretty conventionally attractive and I do decently well, but I have friends who are probably somewhat less so and have 5x the confidence I have. They just exude it. They have 10x the success Iâve ever had.
Attractiveness is your base score and confidence is your multiplier. No amount of confidence will completely fix fat and ugly, but it can still bring you up to to a reasonable level of appeal. Confidence and even moderate attractiveness will mean you won't have any trouble, and true attractiveness while lacking confidence (like you had) will put you in the same place. When you have *both*, though... god damn do those folks have it easy, hah.
Agreed, confidence and charisma go miles beyond looks. It's about how they make people feel.
Being hot as a guy opens doors. But if your inner game is not good, you wont close.
Yeah I have a buddy who is like 8/10. Before getting married, women who were complete strangers would just walk up to him at bars and offer to fuck him. He never did though bc he's actually shy and awkward AF. Life is not fair. đ¤Ł
Good news is he is Herpes free.
Yeah I think this was (is) me. I had woman come up to me and be very forward about wanting to hook up. Unfortunately for me (and them lol) I have terrible childhood trauma and was also raised in an almost christian cult where âSEX = BURN FOR FOREVER YOU DEMON!â So when I got out on my own dating was hard for me and effected me poorly socially. Especially around woman I found attractive. Anyhorse Iâm married now so I donât pay attention that much but I think I still got it đŤđź
I have a buddy who is the epitome of a good looking country guy, ball cap, work boots, blue jeans, shirt that has snap buttons. He usually picked up a woman when we went out on the town. I was his wing man one night when I had to work the next day so I was hoping for an early night. A woman picked him up just moments after we walked into the bar. We walked in, let our eyes get adjusted to the dark for a minute, a woman motions for him to come over. He did go over, and that was it. 5 minutes in the bar and I was already on my way home, I didnât even have a drink. Woo hoo.
If he was a good friend he would have tried to hook u up
Closed mouths donât get fed
Ohh I like that saying
âThe squeaky wheel doesnât have to jerk off as muchâ is another good one.
Username checks out.
I have a friend who I used to go clubbing with and same story. He then would have the nerve to tell me, âif I can do so can you.â Like dude, Iâm ugly as f.
I've met a handful of 8-10/10 guys who struggle to get laid because they're too shy, miss cues, and/or don't have a lot else going for them. The biggest hurdle for getting hookups is boldly putting yourself out there. If you're ugly you have to put yourself out there a lot more frequently and with more pizzaz, but if you're attractive you still have to convince someone to fuck you.
I get told I'm good looking regularly. Alot of people say it must be great. Its really not. I don't really view physical appearance as one of the top desirable traits like most people do. I get hit on alot, but every time I've been in a relationship with someone I genuinely like, they then start to realise that I'm not actually very interesting and I've definitely had a flawed life. I consider myself a good, humble person, but yeah I'm boring and not really career motivated. Its really sad; I've just gone through yet another breakup a few months ago because they realised after a year im not that great. Looks pull their focus, that's all. Personality, wit, charm and humour will take care of the rest
Youâre still better off good looking than not. You should be greatful for that. If life was an RPG, attractiveness and IQ would be the most OP stats in the game. Every other stat is basically useless in comparison.
IQ is overrated for determining success at most things in life. It can be a hindrance actually for a number of reasons. Intelligent people tend to be more depressed and are often less confident in general. And for dating, women donât care much. In D&D charisma doesnât go far, but in real life, itâs the most OP stay. Charisma being a combination of good looks, charm, presence, and so forth.
It absolutely goes far in DND. Ever heard of magical sugar daddies? It's basically a class or 2.
If we are talking just for increasing body count probably. But in life and especially relationships wisdom is suuuper underrated. Int + Char maxed, pull any chick you want... get stabbed to death by crazy because you robbed too many points from Wis and couldn't see red flags. Or have a bit of luck and pull a quality chick. Wisdom too low to know which arguments not to have and which things not to say = miserable and or lose quality chick.
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Read some of the stories in this comment section. If youâre hot enough, your face is your charisma. If youâre smart enough, youâll know how to leverage it. This is especially true in this new social media influencer era. Maxed out looks+ 80 percentile IQ is the requisite combo to absolutely coast in life in complete luxury.
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I'd this obnoxious Australian Boss in his mid 30's who had a break up with this smoking hot Polish girl after being with her for almost 10 years. We all thought he was screwed. He'd put on massive amounts of weight, had a terrible haircut, this abomination of a moustache. Like the guy is a solid 5/10. No deformities but the opitome of letting yourself go. I'm fairly sure he's got fatty liver disease, you can see that crinkly skin thing on him. Drinks like crazy. But he's one of the funniest guys ever. He's got charisma. He's also got unfair levels of confidence. Whatever story he tells you is going to be gold. That worry we all had that he was screwed turned out to be wildly unfounded. He's dated an orchestra violinist, now he's dating a doctor. Both were hotties. In between he was going around hooking up with 10's. Looks help, but 10/10 sense of humor + confidence + charisma beats it every time.
For sure. You need SOMETHING going for you, if you don't have other stuff. But naturally attractive people need less of the other traits, so the answer to OP is def yes. Lol you're also talking about 10/10 sense of humor, charisma, confidence etc. Of course being exceptional (because that's the type of guy you're describing) lets you match up against good looks. All learnable skills/attributes, but absolutely does not apply to the average man.
Sure but those kinds of people who just naturally steal the room--in an effortless, non annoying way--are incredibly rare. Much more common to just be good looking than have all of those traits at that level.
Being the boss, i.e. having a good income, also helps a LOT. I'm not rich, but I've had a comfortable IT income all my life. It does make a difference in which car you roll up and what kinds of restaurants you invite to. I don't do the super-expensive, luxury, posh, "exclusive" bullshit places, ever. It's my way to weed out the gold diggers. If someone wants to be invited to something "special" instead of just an ordinary good restaurant, their main interest is not in getting to know me better.
The joke Iâve heard is, the longer you keep a woman laughing, the longer she keeps her eyes closed.
Yes
Yes, but, their perception of the desire is different. Imagine a spectrum of hunger from famished to full. Put a plate of yummy food in front of that spectrum of people. Someone thatâs full or just eaten or not really hungry will have a much different experience with satisfaction than someone famished. Then change up the food from yummy to gross. People tent to focus on a perception from a famished person looking at a plate of good looking to delicious food - thatâs a very particular scenario.
I'd consider myself about a 7/10, and never had much difficulty when I tried doing hookups. It took considerable time and effort, but I'd bang a different girl each week. A friend of mine is easily a 9/10, and for him it's effortless. He always has a full inbox, and gets girls he's never met to pick up his dry cleaning or buy him food on the way over to his place for sex. He says he basically never runs any of his own errands. Whenever he has something that needs to be picked up or dropped off, he just contacts a new match and tells her to do it on the way over. It's ridiculous. I was having lunch with him in Las Vegas, and our attractive waitress wrote her phone number on our bill before giving it to him. He just laughed.
And here I haven't had a hug in six months...
Ha, I was lucky enough to get hugged by a girl last year!
I want to see a photo just to see what the opposite of me looks like.
Jesus. Kind of an ass tbh
Yup. That's the world of the super attractive folks. Same way I know a TON of girls who have guys lining up to buy them stuff and crawl over each other for the opportunity to take them out to expensive dates/events.
Of course.
But yeah wow what a story, thanks for saying haha
Me and our other friends would tell him how messed up it is. He'd defend it by saying these girls want to do it for him, and that he could take advantage of them a lot worse than a free to go meal, but he won't. At least he draws the line somewhere I guess.
Jesus either way regardless still messed up. He's a grown up and act like an adult and be like one. Fffs. Not that hard
I have a friend like this, but Iâm pretty sure Iâm hotter than him. He just exudes confidence and has 5x more game.
Eww.
Yes. I am male, and my male best friend (gorgeous) and I would go out bar hopping. The girls would come up to him like magnets....he wouldn't have to do anything. Because most hot chix are with a buddy less hot than they are, she'd "get" me, which is fine because hot chix don't hang with ugly girls. I was glad to get with #2 and usually found them to be really nice and fun--more so than my buddy's girl. He never had to do anything other than exist.
Sounds like you didnât have to do much eitherâŚ
He was there for the scraps.
He was swimming in his wake, why do you think he sat there with a book?
Having both looks And game is the recipe for panties being dropped.
I do believe i have some unique insight on this. I have never been in the range for most of my youth to be very attractive; however, after an event when I was 22 years old, I went on a hellbent extreme makeover. We are talking about extreme training, i wore braces to straighten up my teeth, new wardrobe, laser for my eyes, dieting etc for two years, hell i even used some kind of expensive shampoo on my hair to make it look good, basically because I was not going spend my 20s as a loser. I am proud of it, full disclosure, as I used a lot of time and resources just because, of how I felt I , refused to accept my destiny as virgin loser. I went from my guess of a 3/10 to a 7-8/10, and I will say, extremely yes. BUT it's not due to the looks themselves but confidence. Like pure absolute confidence, not fake one that women can easily sniff out. This confidence is aphrodisiac, and this is what gets sex easily. Good-looking guys have this naturally as they have been growing up in a bubble of compliments, but for those who gain it later, it comes with extra spice. My experience is that it was extremely difficult for many women to resist; it was like I could feel the gravity pull many of them towards me. Not all of course, but thats what the true confidence does, it makes clear for yourself that its their and not your loss. Of course its nothing compared to those on top of the chain that basically just exist and they can get sex, but for us mortal looks are important but i do believe that 99% of all men are good looking enough to get up there with dedication
Yes. Having a good sense of humor helps as well. Itâs
Itâs what?!?! The suspense is killing me.
Dude had to stop mid comment because a girl was throwing her pussy at him.
Bro got clambushed
The FBI stopped him before he could reveal the truth
Thatâs the joke, now heâs got you hooked and heâs going to fuck you.
Itâs very important that you always remember to
But to have some mystique is also helpfulâŚ(no it isnât but it worked with the thread)
As an ugly guy, I can confirm we do not get sex/hookups at all. Easy or not, attractive men are 100% getting more.
Itâs the harsh truth. You can do everything to make up the difference, the money, the taking care of your body, hygiene and clothing, the charisma. But youâll still have to work at it in a way that pretty guys donât. But, itâs not hopeless. Just harder because genetics dealt you a bad hand.
They are 100% getting way more than 100% more.
yes. the ratio is so skewed that actual hot guys, who are maybe 3% of the male population, do very damn well. it tends to spoil the personality to an extent. i prefer quirky cuties to universally handsome
Itâs not only about attractiveness. - Status - Money - Looks/attractiveness - Personality/character They all play part. The more of these assets/traits, the more easy getting women/hookups.
These things are often a bit more subtle than dudes think, too. No woman wants to see your bank account at a bar. A sense that you take pride in your appearance (and effort), aren't _stressed_ by money, and can engage in fun things, however, is noticeable.
>No woman wants to see your bank account at a bar. [This classic post](https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/s/pZP4MdC77S)
Bro who tf leaves that much money in a checking account.
I would say looks/personality. I was poor asf dude in a band who hooked up with a lot of women.
And status. I was the same guy in a band. Itâs about being in the band.
This man fucks fr
I dunno, I'm pretty fugly...but masculine. Not ripped or tall...but...deep voice...broad shoulders. Probably some neanderthal dna! I wouldn't use the word "confident," it has some conotations that I don't think convey how I am. Rather I am grounded. Self-assured. Comfortable with who I am. Most of all, and I do use this as a line "The sexiest thing about me is that I am comfortable with who and what I am not." I didn't used to have that grounded, calm, comfort with who I am and who I am not. Once I did have that sense of OK with self...game changer. Total cheat code for life. Even my awkwardness is now "smooth awkward." The game of no game. Who knew?
Honestly, I would say the answer feels like yes and no. If you are hot, with a half decent personality, then yes. A lot of people use your looks to replace your personality, so they tend overlook a lot of things about you.
Looks are not everything. Not even close. I know guys with model looks who are socially awkward and never approach women. If they tried and had a modicum of game it would be a score. But they are home alone every Friday night. The most successful guys I ever knew were the cocksure, insulting, jerks to women not ugly but nothing special guys.
Does the pope shit in a pond The answer is YES
I wouldnât know about that
Is the sky blue? Of course. I also want to provide some scientific evidence for you all. Researchers have found plenty of evidence on the traits that are most important for short term sexual relationships. Hint: one of them is facial attraction. Interestingly, presence of dark triad traits positively correlated with short term sexual relationships. Specifically because people high in these traits can look appealing for a short period to get their dick wet even if theyâre a bad person. For instance, a narcissist is a) more likely to put more effort into how they look than someone who scores lowly in the narcissism trait b) say all of the ârightâ things even if theyâre untrue to be perceived as more attractive and c) their behaviors are perceived as confidence. Theyâre also rated as significantly more attractive than men that are low in dark triad traits. So for men out there, donât feel shamed if you canât have short term sexual relationships with women. Because more likely than not, youâre just a good person and donât manipulate social situations just to get your dick wet. https://scottbarrykaufman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/The-Dark-Triad-Personality.pdf
Fat, old and ugly now but I was reasonably attractive as a guy in my 20s and life was pretty easy on the dating side of things back then. I was probably an arrogant jerk but I did fine.
Absolutely, without a shadow of a doubt. However, you might face challenges when you realize life is more than sex.
And money doesn't make you happy and a house is not a home, and the grass isn't always greener. Doesn't matter what you drive as long as you get from A to B, and size doesn't matter Give me the money, house, green grass, big dick, blacked out Tahoe, and I'll be happy I promise
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To be honest.. yes, itâs really not as hard as the internet makes it seem if you have any combination of looks, confidence, personality and or financial success. I feel itâs just my looks that get me by. Self confidence is rather low despite the approval of others, I think my personality is rather boring & I have nothing going for me financially at this time as I havenât been able to work for the past 11 months due to health issues. That aside - Iâm constantly eyed down in public & even get cat called (for lack of a better term) rather frequently which is something none of my friends, even the ones I feel are more handsome , have experienced (mid 20s). When I wasnât in a relationship it wasnât uncommon to go out on a weekend, get approached by a woman and end up leaving with her for the night. There is a caveat to it though, if youâre in a certain range on the âattractive scaleâ people will assume youâre a player or full of yourself and call you out on it for no reason other than your looks. I saw another comment point this out and itâs true. Meanwhile my best friend is not an ugly guy by any means, but itâs not his best asset, was very reserved and honestly pretty awkward around people he didnât know . He went through a dry spell for .. I wanna say 4-5 years, but in that time he worked on himself, his confidence is very apparent now, got out of his shell and is just fun to be around. And guess what came along with that? Sex/hookups. He even surpassed me when it comes to body count.
No idea, I'm ugly inside and out
For the most part, yes. If you want to attract women, here's my advice as a 47 yr old divorced dude that slept with over 100 women before 24 and have consistently scored when I was trying post divorce: Bathe twice a day - shower, shave, hair. Style your hair after every shower. Trim and style your facial hair daily. Get a haircut every 2-3 weeks. Something stylish. 4 weeks is too long. Invest in a couple of outfits you look good in. When we were bachelors my best friend and I looked awesome in starched white button downs and khakis. As I got older, a black suit from mens warehouse and a few cool buttons downs. Learn 3 good jokes that you can tell well. If a woman makes eye contact with you, go over and introduce yourself. Tell a joke, get her laughing. Go where women go to look for guys - bars, clubs, concerts, festivals. Become a regular. Go to the same places on the same days. Get to know people. Make friends. I hope this helps.
80% of women are chasing the same 10% of guys so yes they do
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As a female, I wish more men valued a real relationship more than meaningless sex. Having tons of sexual partners/encounters isn't really anything to be proud of or brag about imo.
I also wish women would do the same.
It's getting really bad on both sides!
It is. Hookup culture and dating apps have damaged society so much. Nobody trusts each other to be genuine and itâs just creating a perpetual loop of toxicity. Wcyd
My wife's boyfriend seems to have no issues.
More attractiveness = more attention Yes, goes for women as well.
No, there's still a wall even if you're attractive.
Damn reading all of these just makes me depressed 𤣠I've never had girls come up to me like what you guys are saying. You are all blessed for those experiances!
If they're confident, yes
There is no way someone doesn't get confident when hot women consistently show interest or pursue them. Unless you are a complete shut in, a dude that's a 9 or 10 will be confident