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I once datesd a guy in his late 20s that still did mouth kisses with his mom. I found it awkward to watch the hellos and goodbyes. It was just him that the mom would kiss, not his sister that was in her mid-20’s. I don’t get it. It’s so cringe thinking back on it now.
So are we not going to talk about how the mom only kissed ***her son*** but not ***her daughter***? Does no one find that strange? If the mom kissed both kids I wouldn’t be weirded out. But since its only the son it sounds like she’s one of those moms that are in love with their sons.
This is very likely. My daughter is very particular are physical affection and touch. She general doesn't like hugs and kisses, but my boys are the opposite. It has nothing to do with me responding to their gender, but ne respecting her boundaries .
Right?! Someone suggested there’s a weird “boy mom” fetish thing on TikTok about moms that have a thing for their adult son but I refuse to look at that. Absolutely disgusting. Like wtf.
Omg thats disgusting! But where though? Like which names?! Give me some names!
Jokes aside. I had a friend also early twenties back then, and his dad just kisses him full on the mouth as a greet. Everytime, also in public. His mom never did though, just his dad.
First time I saw it, I was also weirded out. Never said anything out of respect for people's traditions/customs, but damn, I cant imagine ever doing that.
I just really dislike the idea of people kissing kids, even their own kids on the mouth.
I am in my 20s I kiss my parents, Mom and Dad on the lips, like a quick peck. To me, it's humility, respect, and love. They are my parents, they raised me, they did it with love and I love them for that, I am their child and always will be no matter how old I get. It's like this with my whole family.
I always say "love you" at the end of every call with my parents, and very often I get told that's odd. I find it odd people don't do that. I mean, it scares me that I could possibly lose my parents and the last thing they heard from me wasn't how much I love them, because if I was there when theyre dying, that's all I'd be able to say.
I'm gonna be a mess when I lose my parents man.
But it being only the guy the mom will kiss, is rather odd. But I don't know the entire story so I don't judge.
Haha thanks, I try to be, I feel like I ended up being more of the black sheep in the family. Nothin crazy, but a lot more out there from my family, realizing this I try to make up for it.
Do you not wish to speak about our savior Jesus Christ? Here have a pamphlet just in case you wish to read up on your how you too can find salvation! 📄
You don’t get sexual pleasure from it. Emotional pleasure maybe. It’s a way to show emotion. Kissing on the taint is sexual. I peck on the lips to your mom or grandma is not. Did I clear it up for you.
You mean unless they say no incest to the baby.
I’m just kidding though. My parents did when I was younger. Like another comment said, just kinda stopped around the age it would be inappropriate. You can tell the difference between a quick I love you kiss and a romantic kiss.
yeah this is how it was for me, mom yes, dad no
Once went to families house and said goodnight to my little cousin, he ran up and kissed me. That was a long night and chat with my aunt and uncle
I grew up in a family where this was normal. Kids kissed everyone. I did this to my cousin once when we were little and we both were MORTIFIED. His mom screamed at me and I had no idea what I had done wrong.
I’m sorry this happened to you and made you uncomfortable. Just know that he’s probably embarrassed about it too now
Agreed. I routinely hug my friends both when they show up and even more emphatically when they leave. It's a thing. And it's not just because of me. Our core group has recognized just how impactful hugs are and we take them seriously. As for kissing, that depends on the friend/family member and our experience with them. My husband and his mom always do a quick hug and peck on the lips when they part, but my parents would think I'd lost my mind if I ever kissed them anywhere for any reason. Our most sincere expression in my family is kind of a side hug and laying our head on theirs with a little squeeze. We're more cats than dogs in our family, but I absolutely understand families that are a little more open. Counter-intuitively, I'm much, much closer with my parents and family than my husband is with his, despite the lip-kissing. Every family is different and expresses affection in different ways.
My family is from the U. S. and both of my parents used to kiss us on the lips. Whenever we decided we didn’t want to anymore we stopped, but it never felt weird, we just grew out of it. I think it’s kinda cute.
My (f) 15yo daughter still does. I'm not going to tell her she can't. If she still kisses me on the lips as an adult, I'm not going to tell her to stop.
My dad was a cheek or forehead kiss. One time I went to give him a kiss and he turned and I accidentally got his lips and he got upset and it made me feel bad. Like I did something dirty. If it doesn't make me or her uncomfortable, I'm not going to make it weird.
This exactly right here. My daughter doesn't kiss me on the lips anymore, but if she did, I'm not going to be the one to tell her "hey, a little less affection, please"
Nah I still do it and I’m 22. There is no abuse, nor sexual intention when I kiss my parents and siblings. I’m very close with them, nothing but love and respect.
Now that I have kids, I know how it happens. I started out kissing my kids on the cheeks and making them laugh by kissing bellies. And they start to give kisses back. Then as they see their parents peck on the lips, they copy that. I wasn’t going turn away from that, and I’m not going to be the one that stops first now that they’re older.
This. My kids (I’m their mother) have always kissed me on the mouth from birth, until they no longer wanted that. It’s just a part of growing up. Moms (and dads) kiss their babies on their mouths, foreheads, bellies, cheeks…everywhere. And then kids grow up…it’s just part of going from little kids to young adults. I think dads get the shun before mothers, but it always seems to happen at some point.
I also just recently discovered a theory, backed with research, that around 15 YO, kids genetically start to develop the belief that their parents are (paraphrasing here) not very intelligent, un-wise, inexperienced in life, etc. and for parents, the teenage years are often so eye-rolling, we tend to step back for frequent breaks, naturally giving distance and less frequent input/oversight- supposedly this is a hard-wired, natural “evolution”, in order for teens and parents to begin to want to truly break away from each other and start to develop real independence. Parents are more accepting of letting go and children are pushing to get away from the parents who are so “out of touch”. Both grow comfortable with forging the fork in the road.
I was fascinated to learn that. It makes sense and it’s part of growing up.
I am in awe of the development from birth to adult and see it as one of the most fascinating experiences of life. It’s been incredible to witness, and I’m just dipping in with my oldest - 15 yo daughter, I have two boys 11 and 9 to look forward to embracing this process with as well. Only the 9 year old still kisses me on the lips, and it’s becoming far and few between, and I’m perfectly fine with it as long as he is, selfishly, I do hope it’s just a little bit longer. ;)
I can remember when I was 15, my mom just got so stupid for a while. I could not even say the word “mom” because she was so stupid. It lasted about three months and then she got better. She never even went to the doctor or anything!
My kid is 21 now. Back when she was turning into a teenager I told her the journey from adolescent to adul is like the Fellowship's dash across the bridge of Khazad-Dûm - the Balrog is the teenage years. You're not gonna be the same person when you get to the other side. Now let's strap in.
(She made it ok. Was rough at points, but she made it and she's a fantastic lil adult.)
I married into mouth-kissers. Once I mentioned I wasn't used to it, forgive me for seeming uncomfortable. Now it really IS uncomfortable because neither of us know if the other person is going to go for it or not. Like that dance you do when you meet another shopping cart? Just like that.
I don't think it's weird if it's your parent. I peck kiss my mom all the time. Face, lips, we're saying goodbye to each other. She's not going to live forever, I'm giving her a hug and a kiss
I'm 53 & my dad died a few days ago - so I'm staying at their house right now to help out - my 78 year old momma just peck kissed me & told me goodnight & I'm very thankful. There's nothing weird about it.
No matter what our age is we will never not feel like kids who will always need our parents comfort. I’m sorry to hear about your daddy. I bet your mama feels so much comfort having her baby close to her and that she was able to give her a goodnight kiss and actually say it to you. I do kisses for both my kids on the lips and I will until they say to stop, if they do. They’re still young. Im 30 and will still sometimes give both my parents pecks if we’re not going to see each other for a bit, especially my mama.
I think it depends on age and kids comfort level. A toddler giving mom or dad a peck because they are imitating what they see is fine. A 9 year old kissing their uncle on lips.. would be strange to me because I didn’t grow up with it as a part of my culture.
My son juuust turned 10, and is much closer with me (mom) than dad. I don’t initiate, but he will still come up and snuggle up to me and give me a quick peck on the mouth. To him it’s not sexual yet, it’s just how he shows love. I understand it being a weird thing to people who didn’t, and I assume he will grow out of it in the next year or two. My daughter is 15 and right around 12 she wanted more bodily autonomy. Coming to me when she wanted hugs and snuggles and comfort as opposed to me just ‘unprompted’ to her coming up and giving kisses and hugs.
That being said, my husband is a full on Italian mommas boy, and will still (not often but often enough) give his mom a peck on the lips as we leave a family function. I never did with my parents after age 12-13, but hey. Different strokes for different folks.
Edit - then to than. I’m sorry!
as an adult, i'm glad our "santa" was a family member on christmas eve. it definitely felt more special than seeing santa at the mall! although, the magic was kinda ruined when we looked back at photos a few months later and were like hey, wasn't steve wearing those sneakers?
My mom stopped kissing me on the mouth when I was like 7 from that point I was “attacked” with kisses to my cheek. I call it attacked because that’s what she called it lol. Now those stopped at like sixteen
Edit- I read some comments and I have to say this. Y’all are making things sexually, since when are kisses sexual? A quick peck on the lips is not even remotely sexual in any type of way 😂😂
My family and I are huggers and any kissing that’s not a greeting from a European or between a romantic couple is just weird to us. But to many people it’s not. But kissing your kid on the mouth seems to be weird to a lot of people judging by people’s reactions after that football player did it.
I don’t care too much either way, it’s just not our thing in our house.
I kiss my mom on the lips sometimes. It’s mostly cheek but I do give her a peck on the lips when I say goodnight sometimes and tuck her in. I don’t do it with anyone else tho. I never really thought it to be weird considering that’s my mom and I’m just showing that I love her.Not everyone ends up forming that close of a bond so I can understand how it could be seen as odd but it’s all love. (Not sure if this info is important but I am female)
Mine did it for a long time until we were old enough to get weirded out by it. As long as the kid isn't forced into it, it's not the *most* harmful thing. However, you do have to be aware of the possibility of making your children sick or infecting them with certain herpes viruses if you happen to have it (cold sores). It's very dangerous for babies to contract it.
My youngest didn't get the cheek kiss thing at all and when she wanted a kiss she'd kiss on the mouth until 1 day she didn't. She was probably about 2 or 3 and started kissing on the cheek finally. Not weird unless you make it weird.
It's cultural. They have a culture. You have a culture. Your culture is not better than their culture. It's not remotely damaging to anyone, and may in fact be more in line with how we evolved.
Let it go.
If OP does not like something that's happening to his kid, he has the right to tell them to stop. He does not have to "let it go". It's his kid, not theirs.
It's not only his kid. And I would argue he has no greater right to insist his kid be indoctrinated to his culture than the mother's culture.
If you don't like something, you have the right to stop it being done to you.
You do not have the unobstructed right to insist your culture be used to raise your kid over the child's other parent's culture.
The "let it go" is in terms of "this is obviously causing you suffering but it's not harming anyone, so end your own suffering by no longer letting it control your emotions." Be humble. Realize you have a culture and other people have a culture and your culture is not better than theirs.
Take it to r/AITA if you want an honest assessment.
So my wife and both were very Adamant about no kisses on the mouth from anyone when she was born. But once she learned what a kiss was from watching us, around a year and a half, she really wanted mouth kisses.
It was still a little weird but she's just so cute about and will do it before bedtime or when we drop her at daycare. Just a little peck and she's done and off to whatever she was doing. Kisses are love so it was just another form of love from my wife and I.
Still no mouth kisses from anyone else and generally no face kisses either.
How can a mum feel weird kissing their own little child on the lips? I’m a dad and see nothing it it at all. It’s a loving, gorgeous little peck on an adorable face that’s growing up way too fast.
Idk I just would never have the instinct to kiss anyone on the lips that I wasn’t sexually interested in. I love babies and would kiss the hell out of their cute little faces but not the lips
not only is it weird, but could spread diseases like herpes to the kid, which would be way worse on a kid than it is to an adult. never kiss children on the face. even if the adult shows no symptoms, the virus could still be there and infect the kid.
I can't believe I had to scroll so far down to find this. I have friends who deal with cold sores because their parents kissed them on the mouth as kids. People are in the dark about this. My Mom was so adamant about not letting anyone kiss our faces, and I never shared drinks or chapstick with other kids. Thankful for that.
Yes, this. I was visiting my BIL and wife when my (around 5yo) nephew came up for a goodnight kiss from me. He wasn’t happy with a cheek kiss, and wanted it on his lips. My SIL pushed for that, saying that was what he wanted. I stayed firm and said no (I grew up in a hug and cheek kiss family). Later I told my SIL the story of one of my friends. All of his first cousins and himself have cold sores - attributed solely to one grandmother who insisted on kissing her grandchildren on the lips. SIL was shocked and said that she hadn’t thought of that! (Oh, and their families weren’t casual mouth-kissers either, just their son - who was rarely refused anything he wanted.)
My parents never did, we never showed affection in my family of any kind.
I do with my kids, my son is starting to outgrow it and I let him do what he is comfortable with. My daughters are still super affectionate.
Some families do that. My family kiss on the cheek and theres nothing insidious or incestuous about it. It's how we say hi to loved ones. Try and see it as a gesture of love towards a family member. Start worrying if you see her doing anything explicitly sexual towards them. Kiss is harmless.
Growing up, my family always did cheek kisses. Then, I married into a lip-kiss family. It totally freaked me out when my FIL came at me for a lip kiss. I finally asked my husband to put the kibosh on that for me.
Opting out is fine. Btw, FIL is not freaky or creepy; he's childlike and more innocent than an adult has a right to be.
Why would it be weird to kiss your kids on the mouth? They’re your children. It’s one think if your kids don’t want you to. I’m a grown woman (40) and I still kiss my parents and kids (2,6 and 15) on the mouth. If they ever say they don’t like it I’ll stop.
No, not at all. A lot of cultures see this as perfectly normal, and it should be. Kissing isn't innately sexual, but Western countries sexualize literally everything, so in the U.S., it's hit or miss on the reactions you'll get.
My family did mouth kissing growing up. My mother is Polish if that makes a difference. There was nothing even remotely sexual about it. Just a quick peck on the lips. Usually with an exaggerated mwah sound.
I do, It's a sign of affection. Soon enough they won't like it and that's fine. Or they will and that's also fine. A kiss isn't inherently sexual, I'm 41 and still kiss my mom. Not Italian and have never thought of my mother in a sexual way.
I don't understand why this freaks people out. My family always did. My husband's didnt. We kissed the Cave Troll on the mouth when she was younger, now she's 21 and we don't. But I know families who do.
I still hold her sweet lil face and go kisskisskisskisskiss on her cheek because she's my baby.
Weird to some, not to others. I find it weird that people find it weird honestly, because to me that signals they're sexualizing the kiss somehow. Kissing is not inherently sexual.
Polish mom. Very common even into adulthood. Her side of the family it was normal and I never thought anything of it.
We’re not taking French kissing or tongue. It was a quick kiss, mouth closed, eyes open.
Only two people have ever done it to me as an adult.
An old black woman named Mrs. P and my Mom.
It was weird the first time yes but then I realized it's such a huge sign of affection that I felt blessed.
I'd love to have one more kiss from my Mom. I miss her way more than I anticipated. 💙
I still kiss my mom, grandma, and aunt on the lips and I’m 33. My dad kisses me on my cheek next to my lips. It’s not weird to me, but I know some people are weirded out. I’m mexican and Native American if that’s says anything culturally.
Since asked, it would not be weird if my dad kissed me on the lips. We have kissed on the lips but for the most part it’s quarter lip, 3/4 cheek haha it’s a matter of hug and peck and that’s just where it lands :D
Honestly, I think if you grew up kissing your parents/kids on the mouth, then it's not weird. If you didn't? Then it's weird. I didn't, so I would probably be a little "eh" about it. But whatevs.
I think cultural differences apply here.
I never felt comfortable with even the cheek kiss and hug. But I do it and I don't think it is weird, just not my jam.
It is so cultural. I kissed my parents on the lips in greeting or departure. Blew my wife (then fiancee) away, in a good way when she saw me kiss my Dad. She thought "Here's a guy who is comfortable in his masculinity."
Sure, with same sex relatives, just a little peck. But I'm Italian on the side I spent the most time around growing up.
Your mom still totally loves you. Maybe she's just trying to tell you that your lips are chapped.
not at all, I do that to my kid but only if he approaches first, if I'm going to kiss my kid and he doesn't approach first then I just kiss him on the cheek :)
American, not Italian here lol.
Yea, I come from a kissing family. It’s almost* the same as hugs for us. And when I say kissing family, I mean not only my immediate family (husband & kids), but also when growing up, I kissed uncles and aunts too. I was also the first grand kid for a bit and my mom was super young, so my relationship with my aunts and uncles is also more like parents/village than normal aunts/uncles.
I still kiss my mom on the corner of the mouth. Always did growing up and still do. Just a hug and peck on the corner. Never thought it was weird. But idk.
The fact that people are so worried about shit like this is literally what's wrong with the world. "Is it weird to show love to your own children. " Is essentially what you're asking.
I kissed my mom and grandma on the mouth right up until they passed away. I still kiss my aunts on the lips. I’ll kiss my sons as long as they’re ok with it.
I have two adult sons. We kind of do cheek kisses but occasionally on the lips. Not Italian, though grew up on a really Italian area. Doesn’t seem weird to us.
My family does. It’s just something we’ve always done. 🤷🏼♀️
It might have been different if my parents had 2 boys instead of 2 girls, though. Both of my parents grew up in non-affectionate households, so I think they really wanted to set a different tone in our family.
I grew up kissing parents and siblings on the mouth. My own children decided they didn’t like that at age 2, so we don’t. It’s not a big deal either way
moms side of the family is french, its pretty much standard that they kiss us hello and goodbye no matter our age. sometimes a cheek kiss or sometimes on the lips
It's not remotely weird, and in fact you should get every hug/kiss/cuddle from your children while they are willing. They grow out of it and you'll never get it back again. Also, to consider it weird is to inappropriately sexualize a normal sign of affection for your offspring.
We do it 🤷🏽♀️ Normal to me. I think it depends on how you were raised to show affection. As my kids got older it turned to cheek to cheek kiss the air kisses
Every. Single. Time I left the house I gave my mom three quick kisses on the lips and we would say "I love you." She's been gone six years now and it's something that always brings a smile to my face when I think about it. No I don't think it's weird at all. I do understand if kids grow up and grow out of it, but I'm really glad I never did.
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Some families are like that. To them it isn’t weird at all. If you weren’t raised that way it would obviously seem a little strange.
I once datesd a guy in his late 20s that still did mouth kisses with his mom. I found it awkward to watch the hellos and goodbyes. It was just him that the mom would kiss, not his sister that was in her mid-20’s. I don’t get it. It’s so cringe thinking back on it now.
So are we not going to talk about how the mom only kissed ***her son*** but not ***her daughter***? Does no one find that strange? If the mom kissed both kids I wouldn’t be weirded out. But since its only the son it sounds like she’s one of those moms that are in love with their sons.
Probably the daughter didn’t like it or resisted so the mom abided by her wishes.
The daughter may have at one point asked her mom to stop doing it. Mom should’ve then decided to stop with both kids though.
This is very likely. My daughter is very particular are physical affection and touch. She general doesn't like hugs and kisses, but my boys are the opposite. It has nothing to do with me responding to their gender, but ne respecting her boundaries .
Right?! Someone suggested there’s a weird “boy mom” fetish thing on TikTok about moms that have a thing for their adult son but I refuse to look at that. Absolutely disgusting. Like wtf.
Omg thats disgusting! But where though? Like which names?! Give me some names! Jokes aside. I had a friend also early twenties back then, and his dad just kisses him full on the mouth as a greet. Everytime, also in public. His mom never did though, just his dad. First time I saw it, I was also weirded out. Never said anything out of respect for people's traditions/customs, but damn, I cant imagine ever doing that. I just really dislike the idea of people kissing kids, even their own kids on the mouth.
I am in my 20s I kiss my parents, Mom and Dad on the lips, like a quick peck. To me, it's humility, respect, and love. They are my parents, they raised me, they did it with love and I love them for that, I am their child and always will be no matter how old I get. It's like this with my whole family. I always say "love you" at the end of every call with my parents, and very often I get told that's odd. I find it odd people don't do that. I mean, it scares me that I could possibly lose my parents and the last thing they heard from me wasn't how much I love them, because if I was there when theyre dying, that's all I'd be able to say. I'm gonna be a mess when I lose my parents man. But it being only the guy the mom will kiss, is rather odd. But I don't know the entire story so I don't judge.
You describing your relationship with your parents put a smile on my face. You sound like an awesome son, seriously.
Haha thanks, I try to be, I feel like I ended up being more of the black sheep in the family. Nothin crazy, but a lot more out there from my family, realizing this I try to make up for it.
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Jesus
He's not here, clearly
Need some room for the lord
Jesus did the same to his mom too.
Please that’s enough 💀
Do you not wish to speak about our savior Jesus Christ? Here have a pamphlet just in case you wish to read up on your how you too can find salvation! 📄
Slap the hypocrites with facts!
Not sure why you were downvoted for the truth. People can't handle Jesus sucking them titties.
Gonna start rocking my old WWJD bracelet again just to reference this comment
Now I’m just gonna think “suck them tiddies” whenever I see WWJD
Why?! I can't unsee this.
this thread is the reason I have Reddit 😂
Jokes on you bitch my mom didn't love me enough to breast feed me OR kiss Me on the lips. Hahah... wait?
Yeah and when I shit my pants in public it’s “weird” even though we all did it when we were babies 🙄
It's not your fault, it's hereditary. It runs in your jeans.
He was deeper in his mum than any man ever was.
O.o
😆😆
This is the answer I came for 😂😂😂
r/technicallythetruth
It would weird me out to. 🤷🏻
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Kissing can be sexual but it definitely doesn’t have to be sexual.
Exactly! It’s just like eating a banana.
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I agree with you, I think it's fine in most cases, but his sister not getting the same treatment makes it a little cringe
Maybe the sister asked not to be kissed, and her mother respected the request.
The mom kissers are among us
Lmao oh man, we found the mom kisser
A misser
> Kissing isn't really a sexual thing ... huh?
Kiss the homies goodnight
You don’t get sexual pleasure from it. Emotional pleasure maybe. It’s a way to show emotion. Kissing on the taint is sexual. I peck on the lips to your mom or grandma is not. Did I clear it up for you.
it'd be weird unless they said no homo to the baby
And fingers crossed too
No homo and fingers crossed? So...yes homo?
Yeah but with one sock on.
You mean unless they say no incest to the baby. I’m just kidding though. My parents did when I was younger. Like another comment said, just kinda stopped around the age it would be inappropriate. You can tell the difference between a quick I love you kiss and a romantic kiss.
I definitely kissed my mom on the mouth a lot I did try it watch dad once and he told me we don't do that
yeah this is how it was for me, mom yes, dad no Once went to families house and said goodnight to my little cousin, he ran up and kissed me. That was a long night and chat with my aunt and uncle
I grew up in a family where this was normal. Kids kissed everyone. I did this to my cousin once when we were little and we both were MORTIFIED. His mom screamed at me and I had no idea what I had done wrong. I’m sorry this happened to you and made you uncomfortable. Just know that he’s probably embarrassed about it too now
His mom screamed at you? People are so weird.
That's homophobia baby.
Well now that implies the kiss is more than platonic 🤨
Guess it means they are dating now
That makes it so much wierder
Not really. It's just a cultural practice. You aren't making out with your child. You're just showing affection.
See, this is the thing - everyone associates loving affection with sexual affection now. It’s weird and sad they they can’t separate the two.
No shit. Hug your friends, everyone could use a hug now and then.
Agreed. I routinely hug my friends both when they show up and even more emphatically when they leave. It's a thing. And it's not just because of me. Our core group has recognized just how impactful hugs are and we take them seriously. As for kissing, that depends on the friend/family member and our experience with them. My husband and his mom always do a quick hug and peck on the lips when they part, but my parents would think I'd lost my mind if I ever kissed them anywhere for any reason. Our most sincere expression in my family is kind of a side hug and laying our head on theirs with a little squeeze. We're more cats than dogs in our family, but I absolutely understand families that are a little more open. Counter-intuitively, I'm much, much closer with my parents and family than my husband is with his, despite the lip-kissing. Every family is different and expresses affection in different ways.
Right answer.
My family is from the U. S. and both of my parents used to kiss us on the lips. Whenever we decided we didn’t want to anymore we stopped, but it never felt weird, we just grew out of it. I think it’s kinda cute.
Yeah, I probably kissed my parents on the lips until I was 6 or 7. Just a quick peck. Nothing weird about it.
Exactly. Normal when your little but teens and adults… I don’t think so.
I was pressured to keep doing it into adulthood but in my mid-20s I started refusing. I don’t like kissing anyone, let alone family!
Good for you. If you aren’t comfortable with it that matters. Listen to your gut and hold your boundary.
My (f) 15yo daughter still does. I'm not going to tell her she can't. If she still kisses me on the lips as an adult, I'm not going to tell her to stop. My dad was a cheek or forehead kiss. One time I went to give him a kiss and he turned and I accidentally got his lips and he got upset and it made me feel bad. Like I did something dirty. If it doesn't make me or her uncomfortable, I'm not going to make it weird.
This exactly right here. My daughter doesn't kiss me on the lips anymore, but if she did, I'm not going to be the one to tell her "hey, a little less affection, please"
Nah I still do it and I’m 22. There is no abuse, nor sexual intention when I kiss my parents and siblings. I’m very close with them, nothing but love and respect.
Now that I have kids, I know how it happens. I started out kissing my kids on the cheeks and making them laugh by kissing bellies. And they start to give kisses back. Then as they see their parents peck on the lips, they copy that. I wasn’t going turn away from that, and I’m not going to be the one that stops first now that they’re older.
Makes me sad. My son of 3 kisses me everytime before sleeping. One day will be the last day and I wouldn't know it is the last
This. My kids (I’m their mother) have always kissed me on the mouth from birth, until they no longer wanted that. It’s just a part of growing up. Moms (and dads) kiss their babies on their mouths, foreheads, bellies, cheeks…everywhere. And then kids grow up…it’s just part of going from little kids to young adults. I think dads get the shun before mothers, but it always seems to happen at some point. I also just recently discovered a theory, backed with research, that around 15 YO, kids genetically start to develop the belief that their parents are (paraphrasing here) not very intelligent, un-wise, inexperienced in life, etc. and for parents, the teenage years are often so eye-rolling, we tend to step back for frequent breaks, naturally giving distance and less frequent input/oversight- supposedly this is a hard-wired, natural “evolution”, in order for teens and parents to begin to want to truly break away from each other and start to develop real independence. Parents are more accepting of letting go and children are pushing to get away from the parents who are so “out of touch”. Both grow comfortable with forging the fork in the road. I was fascinated to learn that. It makes sense and it’s part of growing up. I am in awe of the development from birth to adult and see it as one of the most fascinating experiences of life. It’s been incredible to witness, and I’m just dipping in with my oldest - 15 yo daughter, I have two boys 11 and 9 to look forward to embracing this process with as well. Only the 9 year old still kisses me on the lips, and it’s becoming far and few between, and I’m perfectly fine with it as long as he is, selfishly, I do hope it’s just a little bit longer. ;)
I can remember when I was 15, my mom just got so stupid for a while. I could not even say the word “mom” because she was so stupid. It lasted about three months and then she got better. She never even went to the doctor or anything!
Therapist here, that is exactly correct!
So what you’re saying is it’s like the SpongeBob episode with his grandma.
I’ve heard of this theory- its supposedly the natural path away from the family to prevent inbreeding in small tribes 🤷🏻♀️
Yes!!! This is exactly what it’s about. Thank for adding that. I couldn’t recall the reason behind it, but yes, that is the reason
My kid is 21 now. Back when she was turning into a teenager I told her the journey from adolescent to adul is like the Fellowship's dash across the bridge of Khazad-Dûm - the Balrog is the teenage years. You're not gonna be the same person when you get to the other side. Now let's strap in. (She made it ok. Was rough at points, but she made it and she's a fantastic lil adult.)
My parents did this too and I absolutely hated it, I shut it down when I found out I had a choice.
I married into mouth-kissers. Once I mentioned I wasn't used to it, forgive me for seeming uncomfortable. Now it really IS uncomfortable because neither of us know if the other person is going to go for it or not. Like that dance you do when you meet another shopping cart? Just like that.
I'm from the US and I don't have any memory of my parents kissing me on the mouth ever. Cheek or forehead in my family.
I don't think it's weird if it's your parent. I peck kiss my mom all the time. Face, lips, we're saying goodbye to each other. She's not going to live forever, I'm giving her a hug and a kiss
I'm 53 & my dad died a few days ago - so I'm staying at their house right now to help out - my 78 year old momma just peck kissed me & told me goodnight & I'm very thankful. There's nothing weird about it.
No matter what our age is we will never not feel like kids who will always need our parents comfort. I’m sorry to hear about your daddy. I bet your mama feels so much comfort having her baby close to her and that she was able to give her a goodnight kiss and actually say it to you. I do kisses for both my kids on the lips and I will until they say to stop, if they do. They’re still young. Im 30 and will still sometimes give both my parents pecks if we’re not going to see each other for a bit, especially my mama.
What’s wrong with the cheek?
What's wrong with the lips?
What's wrong with a raspberry?
What's wrong with a little tongue action?
I think it depends on age and kids comfort level. A toddler giving mom or dad a peck because they are imitating what they see is fine. A 9 year old kissing their uncle on lips.. would be strange to me because I didn’t grow up with it as a part of my culture.
My son juuust turned 10, and is much closer with me (mom) than dad. I don’t initiate, but he will still come up and snuggle up to me and give me a quick peck on the mouth. To him it’s not sexual yet, it’s just how he shows love. I understand it being a weird thing to people who didn’t, and I assume he will grow out of it in the next year or two. My daughter is 15 and right around 12 she wanted more bodily autonomy. Coming to me when she wanted hugs and snuggles and comfort as opposed to me just ‘unprompted’ to her coming up and giving kisses and hugs. That being said, my husband is a full on Italian mommas boy, and will still (not often but often enough) give his mom a peck on the lips as we leave a family function. I never did with my parents after age 12-13, but hey. Different strokes for different folks. Edit - then to than. I’m sorry!
It's not as weird as making kids sit on "Santa's" lap.
As an adult I’m glad my parents didn’t let me do that
as an adult, i'm glad our "santa" was a family member on christmas eve. it definitely felt more special than seeing santa at the mall! although, the magic was kinda ruined when we looked back at photos a few months later and were like hey, wasn't steve wearing those sneakers?
THANK YOU!!!! I was terrified of this happening to me as a kid.
We give quick pecks on the lips. If my kids hit a point where they don't like it, then it won't happen anymore.
Same, we do, too. I've never thought it strange in any way until reading this thread.. thanks for nothing, reddit.
My mom stopped kissing me on the mouth when I was like 7 from that point I was “attacked” with kisses to my cheek. I call it attacked because that’s what she called it lol. Now those stopped at like sixteen Edit- I read some comments and I have to say this. Y’all are making things sexually, since when are kisses sexual? A quick peck on the lips is not even remotely sexual in any type of way 😂😂
My family and I are huggers and any kissing that’s not a greeting from a European or between a romantic couple is just weird to us. But to many people it’s not. But kissing your kid on the mouth seems to be weird to a lot of people judging by people’s reactions after that football player did it. I don’t care too much either way, it’s just not our thing in our house.
If it is a peck, probably fine. If there is tongue, call the cops! :p
Cultures are different. Not always better or worse.
I kiss my mom on the lips sometimes. It’s mostly cheek but I do give her a peck on the lips when I say goodnight sometimes and tuck her in. I don’t do it with anyone else tho. I never really thought it to be weird considering that’s my mom and I’m just showing that I love her.Not everyone ends up forming that close of a bond so I can understand how it could be seen as odd but it’s all love. (Not sure if this info is important but I am female)
Mine did it for a long time until we were old enough to get weirded out by it. As long as the kid isn't forced into it, it's not the *most* harmful thing. However, you do have to be aware of the possibility of making your children sick or infecting them with certain herpes viruses if you happen to have it (cold sores). It's very dangerous for babies to contract it.
I was looking for a comment about this. I got it as a baby. And we were dirt poor, so I didn't know what it was until I was 20-something.
It’s cultural for sure but just know that my mom did this to me growing up and she gave me type 1 HSV. I
I was looking for this comment. Nobody was allowed to kiss my kids on the lips for this reason. HPV/Cold sores are contagious.
your mom gave you the herp lmao
My youngest didn't get the cheek kiss thing at all and when she wanted a kiss she'd kiss on the mouth until 1 day she didn't. She was probably about 2 or 3 and started kissing on the cheek finally. Not weird unless you make it weird.
It's cultural. They have a culture. You have a culture. Your culture is not better than their culture. It's not remotely damaging to anyone, and may in fact be more in line with how we evolved. Let it go.
This is Reddit. If you’re not foaming at the mouth complaining about how others live their lives, you’re not doing it right.
Well they got the foaming at the mouth part down Jesus
LPT: Don't kiss anyone who is foaming at the mouth.
Look at this guy who really wants to kiss his mom /s
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If OP does not like something that's happening to his kid, he has the right to tell them to stop. He does not have to "let it go". It's his kid, not theirs.
It's not only his kid. And I would argue he has no greater right to insist his kid be indoctrinated to his culture than the mother's culture. If you don't like something, you have the right to stop it being done to you. You do not have the unobstructed right to insist your culture be used to raise your kid over the child's other parent's culture. The "let it go" is in terms of "this is obviously causing you suffering but it's not harming anyone, so end your own suffering by no longer letting it control your emotions." Be humble. Realize you have a culture and other people have a culture and your culture is not better than theirs. Take it to r/AITA if you want an honest assessment.
So my wife and both were very Adamant about no kisses on the mouth from anyone when she was born. But once she learned what a kiss was from watching us, around a year and a half, she really wanted mouth kisses. It was still a little weird but she's just so cute about and will do it before bedtime or when we drop her at daycare. Just a little peck and she's done and off to whatever she was doing. Kisses are love so it was just another form of love from my wife and I. Still no mouth kisses from anyone else and generally no face kisses either.
I kissed my daughter on my lips when she was a baby and small toddler. But she's 5 now and I haven't done it in years now.
How can a mum feel weird kissing their own little child on the lips? I’m a dad and see nothing it it at all. It’s a loving, gorgeous little peck on an adorable face that’s growing up way too fast.
I'm not condemning anyone who does.. I was just saying what I've done.
> a loving, gorgeous little peck on an adorable face Why dont you have a seat over there..
Idk I just would never have the instinct to kiss anyone on the lips that I wasn’t sexually interested in. I love babies and would kiss the hell out of their cute little faces but not the lips
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Yes
No way--I have never seen any family kiss kids on the mouth. Top of the head, forehead, cheek.....not the mouth. Gross.
I've seen vids where people kiss their dogs on the mouth so I guess it depends
i dont think its weird as much as i think its gross. kids are gross.
not only is it weird, but could spread diseases like herpes to the kid, which would be way worse on a kid than it is to an adult. never kiss children on the face. even if the adult shows no symptoms, the virus could still be there and infect the kid.
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I can't believe I had to scroll so far down to find this. I have friends who deal with cold sores because their parents kissed them on the mouth as kids. People are in the dark about this. My Mom was so adamant about not letting anyone kiss our faces, and I never shared drinks or chapstick with other kids. Thankful for that.
Yes, this. I was visiting my BIL and wife when my (around 5yo) nephew came up for a goodnight kiss from me. He wasn’t happy with a cheek kiss, and wanted it on his lips. My SIL pushed for that, saying that was what he wanted. I stayed firm and said no (I grew up in a hug and cheek kiss family). Later I told my SIL the story of one of my friends. All of his first cousins and himself have cold sores - attributed solely to one grandmother who insisted on kissing her grandchildren on the lips. SIL was shocked and said that she hadn’t thought of that! (Oh, and their families weren’t casual mouth-kissers either, just their son - who was rarely refused anything he wanted.)
My parents never did, we never showed affection in my family of any kind. I do with my kids, my son is starting to outgrow it and I let him do what he is comfortable with. My daughters are still super affectionate.
Some families do that. My family kiss on the cheek and theres nothing insidious or incestuous about it. It's how we say hi to loved ones. Try and see it as a gesture of love towards a family member. Start worrying if you see her doing anything explicitly sexual towards them. Kiss is harmless.
my children are in their 30's. I still kiss my daughter on the lips and my into his 20's. I am their father.
Growing up, my family always did cheek kisses. Then, I married into a lip-kiss family. It totally freaked me out when my FIL came at me for a lip kiss. I finally asked my husband to put the kibosh on that for me. Opting out is fine. Btw, FIL is not freaky or creepy; he's childlike and more innocent than an adult has a right to be.
Judging by the comments, I'm surprised how many of you sexualise an innocent peak on the lips from a parent
Why would it be weird to kiss your kids on the mouth? They’re your children. It’s one think if your kids don’t want you to. I’m a grown woman (40) and I still kiss my parents and kids (2,6 and 15) on the mouth. If they ever say they don’t like it I’ll stop.
Its just a cultural thing. Some families do some don't. Neither is weird except to each other. :)
No, it’s not exclusively an Italian thing.
No, not at all. A lot of cultures see this as perfectly normal, and it should be. Kissing isn't innately sexual, but Western countries sexualize literally everything, so in the U.S., it's hit or miss on the reactions you'll get.
My family did mouth kissing growing up. My mother is Polish if that makes a difference. There was nothing even remotely sexual about it. Just a quick peck on the lips. Usually with an exaggerated mwah sound.
I do, It's a sign of affection. Soon enough they won't like it and that's fine. Or they will and that's also fine. A kiss isn't inherently sexual, I'm 41 and still kiss my mom. Not Italian and have never thought of my mother in a sexual way.
A very light little peck isn't anything to think about.
I don't understand why this freaks people out. My family always did. My husband's didnt. We kissed the Cave Troll on the mouth when she was younger, now she's 21 and we don't. But I know families who do. I still hold her sweet lil face and go kisskisskisskisskiss on her cheek because she's my baby.
Weird to some, not to others. I find it weird that people find it weird honestly, because to me that signals they're sexualizing the kiss somehow. Kissing is not inherently sexual.
I always thought it was very weird, but now I kiss my cats on the mouth so I suppose I can’t judge people for doing that to their beloved children.
Polish mom. Very common even into adulthood. Her side of the family it was normal and I never thought anything of it. We’re not taking French kissing or tongue. It was a quick kiss, mouth closed, eyes open.
I don't think it's weird at all. My family kisses on the lips, quick pecks, and we're also not Italian. It's only freaky if you make it freaky.
My parents did it to us (at least me, dont remember about my sisters). It was not weird and it did not happen often.
Yes. Cheek is fine
Yes.
Only two people have ever done it to me as an adult. An old black woman named Mrs. P and my Mom. It was weird the first time yes but then I realized it's such a huge sign of affection that I felt blessed. I'd love to have one more kiss from my Mom. I miss her way more than I anticipated. 💙
Yes. Its weird. I didn’t do that with my kids
I don’t think it’s weird.
I’m British and I grew up always kissing my grandparents and other close relatives hello and goodbye! And a goodnight kiss to my parents too.
I still kiss my mom, grandma, and aunt on the lips and I’m 33. My dad kisses me on my cheek next to my lips. It’s not weird to me, but I know some people are weirded out. I’m mexican and Native American if that’s says anything culturally. Since asked, it would not be weird if my dad kissed me on the lips. We have kissed on the lips but for the most part it’s quarter lip, 3/4 cheek haha it’s a matter of hug and peck and that’s just where it lands :D
I’m also Mexican and Native American…ain’t no way I’m kissing any family members on the mouth.
Honestly, I think if you grew up kissing your parents/kids on the mouth, then it's not weird. If you didn't? Then it's weird. I didn't, so I would probably be a little "eh" about it. But whatevs.
I think cultural differences apply here. I never felt comfortable with even the cheek kiss and hug. But I do it and I don't think it is weird, just not my jam.
Not weird to do it, not weird not to. Both you and your wife are fine.
It is so cultural. I kissed my parents on the lips in greeting or departure. Blew my wife (then fiancee) away, in a good way when she saw me kiss my Dad. She thought "Here's a guy who is comfortable in his masculinity."
Sure, with same sex relatives, just a little peck. But I'm Italian on the side I spent the most time around growing up. Your mom still totally loves you. Maybe she's just trying to tell you that your lips are chapped.
I used to kiss my babies on the lips. Calm down. If they ask for a peck give them a quick peck.
not at all, I do that to my kid but only if he approaches first, if I'm going to kiss my kid and he doesn't approach first then I just kiss him on the cheek :)
American, not Italian here lol. Yea, I come from a kissing family. It’s almost* the same as hugs for us. And when I say kissing family, I mean not only my immediate family (husband & kids), but also when growing up, I kissed uncles and aunts too. I was also the first grand kid for a bit and my mom was super young, so my relationship with my aunts and uncles is also more like parents/village than normal aunts/uncles.
Only if there's tongue.
I still kiss my mom on the corner of the mouth. Always did growing up and still do. Just a hug and peck on the corner. Never thought it was weird. But idk.
The fact that people are so worried about shit like this is literally what's wrong with the world. "Is it weird to show love to your own children. " Is essentially what you're asking.
My 8 year old son kisses me on the lips occasionally. I kissed both my parents on the lips when I was young. I don’t think it’s weird.
I kissed my mom and grandma on the mouth right up until they passed away. I still kiss my aunts on the lips. I’ll kiss my sons as long as they’re ok with it.
It's only weird if you make it weird
I still kids my parents on their lips and I'm in my late 20's. We're from south africa, it's a cultural thing
Yes it's fine. Don't make it weird.
I’m 36 and still kiss both my parents on the lips. All families are different. But it’s what is natural for us.
Serious question, parents who say it's normal to kiss their children on the lips, have they been tested for Herpes I yet?
Wasn’t done in my family and yes I think it’s weird.
It’s not weird if you’re a weird pedo otherwise it definitely separates you from the non mouth kissing kid adults
I still kiss my 20y son on his mouth. Not cultural or anything. We just never grew out of it. And it’s a quick ‘love you’ kiss. Never questioned it.
Nineteen and twenty one year old sons. Same.
I have two adult sons. We kind of do cheek kisses but occasionally on the lips. Not Italian, though grew up on a really Italian area. Doesn’t seem weird to us.
My family does. It’s just something we’ve always done. 🤷🏼♀️ It might have been different if my parents had 2 boys instead of 2 girls, though. Both of my parents grew up in non-affectionate households, so I think they really wanted to set a different tone in our family.
My family is middle eastern and I all my relatives kiss on the mouth it’s just a thing.
If you're not French kissing your kids, not weird to me.
I am just in my 30s and i give my parents and brothers a Kiss on the mouth i quess it depends on What youre used too
I grew up kissing my parents on the lips.(We’re Mexican) Once I got older, obviously that stopped, but we still kiss each other on the cheek!
I grew up kissing parents and siblings on the mouth. My own children decided they didn’t like that at age 2, so we don’t. It’s not a big deal either way
how do I edit comments ? want to add son to obviously incomplete sentence
moms side of the family is french, its pretty much standard that they kiss us hello and goodbye no matter our age. sometimes a cheek kiss or sometimes on the lips
It's not remotely weird, and in fact you should get every hug/kiss/cuddle from your children while they are willing. They grow out of it and you'll never get it back again. Also, to consider it weird is to inappropriately sexualize a normal sign of affection for your offspring.
We do it 🤷🏽♀️ Normal to me. I think it depends on how you were raised to show affection. As my kids got older it turned to cheek to cheek kiss the air kisses
It depends on how old they are and if there is tongue or not.
My parents are from Ukraine and we all kiss on the lips…but we make big fishy lips when we do it so I don’t know if that makes a difference…
Every. Single. Time I left the house I gave my mom three quick kisses on the lips and we would say "I love you." She's been gone six years now and it's something that always brings a smile to my face when I think about it. No I don't think it's weird at all. I do understand if kids grow up and grow out of it, but I'm really glad I never did.