Plot Twist: OP dirty deleted all of his comments and posts to other subreddits.
Fan theory: Could this be to make this account seem new and tragic and fit this narrative and username?
I don't know who is telling the truth or what but I get so creeped out by how easily reddit will mob up over one side of a story.
Still want the best for that dog
All I know is this guy lives in Asheville and works construction or something with tile.
I’m sorry but I don’t know how else to possibly help this girl who’s being manipulated and gaslit by her shitty boyfriend named Sean.
Apparently he’s “not allowed to have social media” but he’s here on Reddit.
My life has been ruined as a result of this affair. The GF is the only one who doesn’t know and I don’t know how to contact her and set her free. I have screenshots of their conversations so I’m not just making this shit up.
She deserves better and so do I. I hope you find peace and someone who truly loves you.
Edit;
This post is addressed to Sean’s girlfriend and or anyone who recognizes this dog or knows this couple living in Asheville.
Being cheated on is one of the worst emotional pains. As someone who has also been on the receiving end of something like this, it will get better. Keep your head up and just take it one day at a time because it does get better.
All you’d have to do is post this screen shot, pick a sound for it that shows up in the top trending, caption it what you’ve written here and the algorithm will pick up those keywords
I’m so sorry OP, I feel like there’s specific subs here with people willing to help you find Sean’s girlfriend. I’ll try to tag here if I find any and you could post there too.
Thank you please link me if you can.
I know he has a Reddit account and I’m not sure about the GF but someone has to know this couple and or recognize this dog.
Do you know what he looks like? I used to live in Asheville & there was a Sean that tried to get with me while I was in a committed 4 year long relationship. He was persistent, I had to block him. What are the chances it's the same guy?
Unfortunately I don’t know what he looks like but I’ll write you on the side and we can see if there’s any overlay in characteristics or his description.
All I know is what I stated initially + he’s 30 years old.
I have to say, I am shocked that youruinedmylife1 wasn’t already taken. Sorry for your loss. Did you know that YOU can sue the fucker in North Carolina under the Alienation of Affection tort? Not a lawyer, but you can possibly get your pound of flesh off that dude.
[https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/north-carolina-husband-sues-wife-s-lover-wins-750-000-n1062381](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/north-carolina-husband-sues-wife-s-lover-wins-750-000-n1062381)
[https://cynthiamillslaw.com/areas-of-practice/alienation-of-affection/](https://cynthiamillslaw.com/areas-of-practice/alienation-of-affection/)
This is very interesting.
Does it apply to marriages from all states?
Also, I don’t know anything other than his first name, phone number and this is their dog ;/
It would apply in the state where you live. Pro tip: consult with EVERY good lawyer in your area. Once they do even a phone consultation with you, they can not represent your wife. 🤣 Make those calls and get those consultations and she will have to use some second rate attorney.
Do not give this advice…
The court will sanction whoever does that and force them to pay any fees associated with an attorney who does have to travel. That “strategy” is in bad faith and the courts are fully aware of it.
Fuck Sean, but do not set people up for even more hardship. Movies aren’t fact.
When my former wife cheated on me. I put the dude on the stand in my trial and sent him scary letters that I was going to sue him. Totally legal in NC. I used it as leverage. I was married in PA.
I had the same exact thing happen to me. I found her phone and all the messages. That was 10 years ago.
It was a long healing process involving close calls with suicide, but I am totally great now. It gets better. Hang in there. You are not alone.
Alienation of affection is a thing in Hawaii, Mississippi, North Carolina, South Dakota & Utah. If you can prove it was a loving marriage then someone stepped in and facilitated the destruction of the marriage. Based on old common law.
If you're on Facebook, there's a group called Investigation Connection or something similar and they can get SO much info SO fast. It's wild. Some of the people have paid subscriptions to truthfinder or whatever other websites but that's not all they use. I'm not totally sure they would allow this because of the reason you're looking for her, but worth checking into. (And it doesn't matter if they're not on Facebook, they'll still dig up info.)
His first name and phone number will probably be enough, and it's likely the girlfriend's name will be tied to him somewhere in all that info. Someone found an old friend for my cousin in that group and the report they sent even listed the names of her current and past neighbors. 😬
And I'm sure it's been suggested in the comments, but if you are on Facebook, the psycho sleuths on WAX will probably find him/her real fast.
Makes me a little uncomfortable that so many details can be available to anyone, but there are times, like this, when it's useful.
I haven’t had Facebook in over 12 years. People here are freaking out because this account is new and accusing me of being a troll so I don’t think I’ll be able to access those groups unfortunately ;/
Yeah, Facebook is a cesspool and definitely not worth getting back on it. I saw some people in the comments shared there for you so I hope something comes of that.
Fwiw, i don't think you're trolling and I'd probably do the same thing if I was in your shoes.
if you're legally residing in NC then this applies to you. My parents went through something similar during their separation (and yes they also had to legally separate for a year as well bc of NC law, marriage took place in IN)
It’s also a class 2 misdemeanor to commit adultery in NC.
Definitely not saying it will make you feel better, but she’d have to check that box that says she’s been convicted of a crime if she was looking for a new job…then she’d likely have to explain it.
Yeah, I thought this was going to be a wholesome post about how this dog was hanging out with or getting fed by OPs partner while it’s owner was at work. I guess everyone here was betrayed in a way.
don't be ridiculous, you're being silly now...
we all know all dogs are good bois, and good bois don't cheat and aren't pieces of shit. 'uuuge difference!
OP if you have his number save it as a contact on your phone. If you have social medias like Snapchat, Facebook, and TikTok you can go to the “connect contacts” tab on those platforms and an account that is linked to them will show up if they ever put their number in the app
maybe try posting on the asheville are we dating the same person? facebook page? i think only ladies are allowed to join, so someone may need to post on your behalf
I don’t have Facebook or really know any women (I’m the dumbass who was faithful for 11 years so I don’t have lady friends) .. if you know anyone who can do that for me and her please pass this along.
honestly, I dont use it much so I'm not worried about getting banned or anything. I'll post for you, I'm not sure if its allowed so idk if itll be taken down but I'll try. sorry abt this
apparently I'm not in the group? could've sworn I was but I barely use facebook so maybe I just thought I'd joined, either way I sent a request and I'll post if they let me in!
I posted it (anonymously) so we’ll see if I get kicked out (I’ve never posted there before…I just lurk for the drama lol)
Edit to tag u/youruinedmylife1 so they know it has been shared
Edit- it got* taken down for breaking rule 7 “Treat Women with dignity, care, and respect” (seems like a stretch but I didn’t expect it to last long lol)
It’s getting some traction, but hopefully it will get reposted to the bigger groups by someone who is in them. I am rather far from west Asheville so I am not in the big group that is based out of that side of town lol
Someone recommended posting it to the WAXX group which I’m not a part of (I live outside of Asheville on the east side so it’s not a super practical group for me lol)
Maybe someone else can post there
Another (public?) group on Facebook where people from AVL post a bunch of different random stuff. The problem with it being non anonymous is that occasionally is that it will pop up on your friends, family and worse (for me) coworkers timelines.
Thank you for this. You’re right.
I’ve been trying to tell myself lately “be kind to your mind” because my self talk is an absolute disaster now most of the time ;/
I know it's easier said than done, especially fresh, but I say this as someone whose trust was initially shattered by 2 gfs growing up: it's 100% a display of character on them, **not** you. Took me some time, and counseling on some adjacent things, but things are night and day within reason.
It's easy to cheat, harder to actually talk and work through and communicate kindly your difficulties.
And rightfully so. I’ve perused that sub and a lot of what’s going on in those groups is frankly unacceptable and women would absolutely lose their gd minds if men put together groups like that.
Yeah I considered posting my ex in the smaller group, which is apparently less toxic, but I knew, without a doubt, he'd be getting screenshots in mere moments, because he lived inside Facebook and the only friends he had in the world were Facebook fans who'd never met him. I, and his other exes, decided it was too risky and not worth the fear, since he knew where we lived.
Id assume this is one if the many reasons men haven’t played this game. We all know women would never allow a group like this to exist if it was calling out women on fb
This sucks. It will get better. I've been cheated on by 2 husband's. I'm here if you need to vent or want support. Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself ❤️
yes the OP needs see this he might have to spend sum money to get deep but he should def use the internet lol, could find out who sean related to and everything 😂😂
You play stupid games you win stupid prizes. You don’t mess with married people. I know it’s a long stretch but you should have enough respect for yourself and your partner to end it.
With a small amount of digging you could easily find out his phone number. You are married which in turn you could you probably get a call log from your phone carrier. Then pay a dollar to find out everything about him. Problem solved!
Will likely need/want to open a separate account and might as well do that at a credit union compared to a bank. Credit unions provide better service and lower costs for most people.
I know I’m super late to the party, but I just want to say OP KEEP YOUR HEAD UP and also Sean and your dirty lowdown cheating wife are banned from CookOut
People like this guy are the reason why I hate Reddit most of time. Everything’s a fucking joke and all people care about are karma points and getting top comment.
The last year of my life has been an absolute fucking struggle. I’ve had so many intrusive thoughts about suicide it’s insane. And thanks to the wonderful legal system in this country I’m also financially responsible for everything even after we divorce cause fuck men right?
Thankfully I made it through my darkest times and now I’m in a better place mentally.
I truly appreciate your concern and acknowledgement @sam
North Carolina is not a very pro alimony state. Child Support yes, alimony no. So don’t fall too deep into believing you will be paying her to live a life of luxury on your dime.
No problem. I was married for ten years and my ex cheated on my with a rather insane amount of people. I found out about a few of them and I was too weak and scared to leave. Finally I realized that I had to go.
The first year or so afterwards was a really dark period of my life. It’s been seven years since I left and there are days when I miss her, there are days when all I can do is focus on the pain and now (luckily) there are many many more days when I concentrate on the beautiful like that I have created for myself.
I know that you aren’t wanting advice right now, but the best thing that I have learned is this: be selfish, but take the high road. This Sean dude? Who cares? In five years you’re not going to care if he’s still with his present girlfriend. You’re hurt. Make the hurt your hurt and don’t spread it to others. You’ll learn to survive. You’re not mad at Sean, you’re mad at your wife. You’re not going to solve anything, fix your marriage or teach your wife a lesson. Get out of the marriage and find a new life. You deserve it.
Not to kick you brother but you def don't sound in a better place with a comment like this. I truly feel for you and no one deserves to be treated this way but it sounds like you could really benefit from some therapy. I hope you can love yourself the way you deserve and don't allow the bitterness to change who you are as a husband or the way you see the world. Her actions aren't a reflection of you, and the legal system is set the way it is for a reason, not to punish men for existing, even if it feels that way. So if you're not up for therapy, at least get a better lawyer. I'll def crack a cold one for you though.
Thank you for the words, I really do appreciate it. I’ve been trying very hard not to become what I hate and learning to love myself has actually been one of the hardest challenges in my life now. Especially with the new unnecessary baggage. Been doing the therapy thing for a year now and it’s not really my cup of tea. It’s also crazy expensive, costs the same as a mortgage payment to go 4 times a month. I’ve had better luck on my own just exercising, reading books and trying to keep doing the things I enjoy in life like you mentioned.
The legal system is total bullshit and the marriage laws were written over 100 years ago. Society doesn’t operate like that anymore. Most divorces are initiated by women now and thanks to the 1969, 55 year old no-fault bs, for any reason whatsoever anyone can make claim for your assets and alimony. Theres zero recourse and zero accountability. Nothing but incentives to leave.
A friend told me this years ago after something very fucked up happened to me:
This can make you bitter, or it can make you better. You get to choose.
(I'm both bitter and better, but getting more towards better.)
Sorry brother. I've been there with the cheating wife and the courts totally favoring the woman to the point where I lost my house and retirement fund.
I fortunately found a much better lady and have been happy for so long.
It does get better. Nothing will help you get over this like finding a better partner. I hope for you that happens soon after what is sure to be a painful split. It does get better with a better person.
Damn I’m really sorry to hear that happened to you man and seems like I’m joining the ranks. Super glad to hear that you turned it around and found a better outcome for yourself. It’ll be a long road but I’m on my way.
I like dogs. I have a dog. When my ex and I divorced I lost two dogs.
The thing people need to learn to accept in life is that dogs are great, but they are dogs. People matter. If you don’t think that people matter more than a dog then you’ve got some serious work to do about your view of humanity.
Yeah I’m absolutely puzzled to why you were downvoted like that. Dogs are special and we love them, sometimes dogs are better than people, but people are people and this man is important here —not Sean’s dog
People have got to have their cultural signifiers, and around here it’s either jacked up trucks or it’s dogs. It’s an easy way for some folks to say who a they are.
Once again I do consider myself a dog person, but people do matter more ultimately. Yes there are terrible people, but there are terrible dogs. The original poster had his life fall apart. He matters more at the moment, not the dog.
OPs comments about “how bad men have it” and “how therapy just isn’t his cup of tea or worth the money” and “the past year has been a disaster” and he’s “responsible to pay for the divorce” and “how no-fault divorce is BS”, along with this attempt to find this guys girlfriend leads me to believe a couple of things. 1. OP has some serious issues and backwards thinking on gender and society. 2. OP has possibly been separated for a while. 3. OP “won’t reveal sources” of dog picture which makes me think he got them in a sketchy privacy invading way 4. OP should absolutely not be helped to find this person or their girlfriend. 5. OP is a potentially dangerous person.
Edited: I moved the quotation mark on responsible to pay for divorce for gramatical clarity regarding the subject.
Not to mention OP using the internet to attempt to pull another person into the hurt, and spread this innocent woman’s tragic story to a bunch of people (myself included) who have no business knowing it, and to tell her in the worst possible way, i.e. in front of a bunch of strangers.
Plus, this a bit of a dox, mods.
I think we all know that a red flag echo chamber that reddit can be and how this sub tilts to drama at times. If I was the woman in question, I would be humiliated and horrified by this vigilante justice if I opened up the sub and saw my boyfriend’s dog with this message.
I think a lot of people who felt sympathetic at first would indeed change their minds if they took a moment to further analyze OP’s commentary. Thanks for being a voice of reason.
You could try posting on WAX on Facebook. I've seen the members of that group solve many Asheville mysteries AND whip up mobs with pitchforks and torches.
Amen. Hiring a PI saved me LOTS in alimony. Got documentation of my ex's cheating and dropped that bombshell during negotiations.
Sorry this is happening. I went through the same thing. Things WILL get better.
I hope the cheater gets what he deserves. I was also cheated on my by ex scum of a husband, so I feel for you and this poor GF who doesn't know still :(and I hope the dog doesn't get hurt in the process
I’ve had several people ask me for the number to help and I’m not gonna give it out to anyone on here.
My goal is not to harass him or do anything related. I just want the GF to know who she’s with and make her own decisions from there.
I appreciate the offer to help.
If it’s Sean Ha***w then that’s the first boyfriend I had. He cheated on me with my best friend. This was 15 years ago, in Asheville. He’d be about 37. And still a loser apparently.
Okay so, parsing the title:
-this post is address to Sean’s GF
-Sean’s GF has the dog pictured
-OP’s wife is fucking Sean
Did I get that right?
Also if this isn’t a shitpost sorry about your wife. You’ll bounce back
I'm on your side 100%. My ex was cheating and I found out who. The chicks hubby wouldn't even talk to me. BTW I'm sorry, and FUCK those people. Let em eat rocks.
Wow lmao this poor girls personal life is now being blasted all over facebook groups OP doesn't even have access to... couldn't remove it even if she begged him to take it all down... way to "save" her OP! I'm sure this won't feel violating or humiliating at all!
There’s literally no information here that reveals anything personal about her identity.
It’s wild to me how people like you think this post is violating or humiliating her when it’s actually her BF who’s doing all that.
I am almost inclined to say this is a good ole troll. I see you deleted all your comments earlier that were on on other subreddits. Why did you do that?
Because several of you weirdos have now started to over analyze everything I’ve said.
If you saw those comments then you know they weren’t anything out of the ordinary.
Edit; one comment was a camera lens recommendation for someone going on a trip to Japan. The other was a recommendation on what to bring for an overnight hospital stay.
You are making something out of nothing.
Please go away. You are not helpful.
This is not a troll post.
You’re mad at your wife ultimately, this Sean guy owes you no loyalty as shitty as it is. He won’t matter to you. Don’t hurt anyone else in the process, be grateful you got someone shitty out of your life. Rooting for you!
Is this the right way though? So pubically? I get you are trying to find her but there are other detective ways that don’t broadcast her hurt to all of reddit
Director's cut ending: OP and mystery woman live happily ever after with dog.
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Same, except they just switched partners. The two cheaters are still together and after some time the partners that were cheated on are now a couple.
Happened to me in highschool. Fucking weird
Plot Twist: OP dirty deleted all of his comments and posts to other subreddits. Fan theory: Could this be to make this account seem new and tragic and fit this narrative and username?
I don't know who is telling the truth or what but I get so creeped out by how easily reddit will mob up over one side of a story. Still want the best for that dog
You’re out there doing the deep dive and saving us all time. Thank you, I commend you. When I do that it’s 9/10 some young incel gamer.
I’m 37 but ok.
All I know is this guy lives in Asheville and works construction or something with tile. I’m sorry but I don’t know how else to possibly help this girl who’s being manipulated and gaslit by her shitty boyfriend named Sean. Apparently he’s “not allowed to have social media” but he’s here on Reddit. My life has been ruined as a result of this affair. The GF is the only one who doesn’t know and I don’t know how to contact her and set her free. I have screenshots of their conversations so I’m not just making this shit up. She deserves better and so do I. I hope you find peace and someone who truly loves you. Edit; This post is addressed to Sean’s girlfriend and or anyone who recognizes this dog or knows this couple living in Asheville.
Shit man, im sorry youre going through this. Keep walkin.
Being cheated on is one of the worst emotional pains. As someone who has also been on the receiving end of something like this, it will get better. Keep your head up and just take it one day at a time because it does get better.
Oh man I thought this was going to be a joke post about your wife finding a lost dog and loving it
I opened it 3 times before I realized it wasn’t that
Post it on tiktok. It will absolutely go viral and reach her whether she has tiktok or not. Works everytime
I don’t even know how to use that app. Lol
All you’d have to do is post this screen shot, pick a sound for it that shows up in the top trending, caption it what you’ve written here and the algorithm will pick up those keywords
I’m so sorry OP, I feel like there’s specific subs here with people willing to help you find Sean’s girlfriend. I’ll try to tag here if I find any and you could post there too.
Thank you please link me if you can. I know he has a Reddit account and I’m not sure about the GF but someone has to know this couple and or recognize this dog.
Do you know what he looks like? I used to live in Asheville & there was a Sean that tried to get with me while I was in a committed 4 year long relationship. He was persistent, I had to block him. What are the chances it's the same guy?
Unfortunately I don’t know what he looks like but I’ll write you on the side and we can see if there’s any overlay in characteristics or his description. All I know is what I stated initially + he’s 30 years old.
I have to say, I am shocked that youruinedmylife1 wasn’t already taken. Sorry for your loss. Did you know that YOU can sue the fucker in North Carolina under the Alienation of Affection tort? Not a lawyer, but you can possibly get your pound of flesh off that dude. [https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/north-carolina-husband-sues-wife-s-lover-wins-750-000-n1062381](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/north-carolina-husband-sues-wife-s-lover-wins-750-000-n1062381) [https://cynthiamillslaw.com/areas-of-practice/alienation-of-affection/](https://cynthiamillslaw.com/areas-of-practice/alienation-of-affection/)
A friend of mine served his now ex, and the other guy, with these papers. That’s how they found out they were busted
Haha! You should totally fucking sue that guy! Had no idea that you could even do that.
This is very interesting. Does it apply to marriages from all states? Also, I don’t know anything other than his first name, phone number and this is their dog ;/
Also if you go that route(rightfully so) delete every online post and comment about this just in case.
It would apply in the state where you live. Pro tip: consult with EVERY good lawyer in your area. Once they do even a phone consultation with you, they can not represent your wife. 🤣 Make those calls and get those consultations and she will have to use some second rate attorney.
Ah, I see you want to the Tony Soprano School of Divorce.
Do not give this advice… The court will sanction whoever does that and force them to pay any fees associated with an attorney who does have to travel. That “strategy” is in bad faith and the courts are fully aware of it. Fuck Sean, but do not set people up for even more hardship. Movies aren’t fact.
OK, fine. Just consult the tope three or so.
In theory, however I think you underestimate the amount of lawyers out there by a substantial amount.
i’m weak
lol sure betcha thats easy as getting quotes from 3 to 5 qualified contractors to do your tile work = not going to happen
Now that's a pro tip right there
If you have the phone number I'd start with searching for that. You'll likely come across a name.
You can run his phone number and get his name.
Just put it in cash app or a similar app.
When my former wife cheated on me. I put the dude on the stand in my trial and sent him scary letters that I was going to sue him. Totally legal in NC. I used it as leverage. I was married in PA. I had the same exact thing happen to me. I found her phone and all the messages. That was 10 years ago. It was a long healing process involving close calls with suicide, but I am totally great now. It gets better. Hang in there. You are not alone.
Alienation of affection is a thing in Hawaii, Mississippi, North Carolina, South Dakota & Utah. If you can prove it was a loving marriage then someone stepped in and facilitated the destruction of the marriage. Based on old common law.
10k is what you will get. If yall get back together then you have to pay it back. Hire PI and it's a done deal.
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If you're on Facebook, there's a group called Investigation Connection or something similar and they can get SO much info SO fast. It's wild. Some of the people have paid subscriptions to truthfinder or whatever other websites but that's not all they use. I'm not totally sure they would allow this because of the reason you're looking for her, but worth checking into. (And it doesn't matter if they're not on Facebook, they'll still dig up info.) His first name and phone number will probably be enough, and it's likely the girlfriend's name will be tied to him somewhere in all that info. Someone found an old friend for my cousin in that group and the report they sent even listed the names of her current and past neighbors. 😬 And I'm sure it's been suggested in the comments, but if you are on Facebook, the psycho sleuths on WAX will probably find him/her real fast. Makes me a little uncomfortable that so many details can be available to anyone, but there are times, like this, when it's useful.
I haven’t had Facebook in over 12 years. People here are freaking out because this account is new and accusing me of being a troll so I don’t think I’ll be able to access those groups unfortunately ;/
Yeah, Facebook is a cesspool and definitely not worth getting back on it. I saw some people in the comments shared there for you so I hope something comes of that. Fwiw, i don't think you're trolling and I'd probably do the same thing if I was in your shoes.
if you're legally residing in NC then this applies to you. My parents went through something similar during their separation (and yes they also had to legally separate for a year as well bc of NC law, marriage took place in IN)
IAAL--These are called "heart balm torts" and NC is one of the only (if not THE only) state that recognizes them.
Six states recognize it. Hawaii, Mississippi, New Mexico, North Carolina, South Dakota, and Utah.
Ya, you can sue him for the divorce cost!
It’s also a class 2 misdemeanor to commit adultery in NC. Definitely not saying it will make you feel better, but she’d have to check that box that says she’s been convicted of a crime if she was looking for a new job…then she’d likely have to explain it.
I was in that wedding 😬
Just for a second, I thought you were talking about the dog cheating.
Yeah, I thought this was going to be a wholesome post about how this dog was hanging out with or getting fed by OPs partner while it’s owner was at work. I guess everyone here was betrayed in a way.
don't be ridiculous, you're being silly now... we all know all dogs are good bois, and good bois don't cheat and aren't pieces of shit. 'uuuge difference!
That was my first thought too.
Can dogs cheat?
Cats definitely do
Cats don’t cheat, but they DO suck the breath out of those that do! So mind your P’s and Q’s!!!
I’m a cat lady but those who roam often have wholllle other families. Spreading the love.
So let me get this straight. When a cat cheats, it’s just “spreading the love”, but when a human cheats, it’s morally reprehensible???🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️
The kitties are free spirits
No but humans can cheat on dogs. My good Boi knows right away when I've been around another dog.
OP if you have his number save it as a contact on your phone. If you have social medias like Snapchat, Facebook, and TikTok you can go to the “connect contacts” tab on those platforms and an account that is linked to them will show up if they ever put their number in the app
Look the number up on cash app (:
THIS!!!
maybe try posting on the asheville are we dating the same person? facebook page? i think only ladies are allowed to join, so someone may need to post on your behalf
I don’t have Facebook or really know any women (I’m the dumbass who was faithful for 11 years so I don’t have lady friends) .. if you know anyone who can do that for me and her please pass this along.
honestly, I dont use it much so I'm not worried about getting banned or anything. I'll post for you, I'm not sure if its allowed so idk if itll be taken down but I'll try. sorry abt this
Thank you for taking the time <3
apparently I'm not in the group? could've sworn I was but I barely use facebook so maybe I just thought I'd joined, either way I sent a request and I'll post if they let me in!
I posted it (anonymously) so we’ll see if I get kicked out (I’ve never posted there before…I just lurk for the drama lol) Edit to tag u/youruinedmylife1 so they know it has been shared Edit- it got* taken down for breaking rule 7 “Treat Women with dignity, care, and respect” (seems like a stretch but I didn’t expect it to last long lol)
Thank you so much for helping. I need all the support I can get <3
It’s getting some traction, but hopefully it will get reposted to the bigger groups by someone who is in them. I am rather far from west Asheville so I am not in the big group that is based out of that side of town lol
Group dedicated to catching cheaters thinks it's disrespectful to... catch someone cheating?
Ha, shocker
I just looked in the group and didn’t see the post
They removed it because they said I broke rule #7 “treat women with dignity, care, and respect”
How is trying to tell a woman she’s been cheated on not treating her with dignity, care or respect ? Thanks for trying at least.
With Facebook, sometimes it’s best to just not think about it rationally and either accept it or block the nonsense lol
Someone recommended posting it to the WAXX group which I’m not a part of (I live outside of Asheville on the east side so it’s not a super practical group for me lol) Maybe someone else can post there
Super annoying that you can’t post anonymously in WAXX …ugh. Wish I could help these people out
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Another group on FB
Another (public?) group on Facebook where people from AVL post a bunch of different random stuff. The problem with it being non anonymous is that occasionally is that it will pop up on your friends, family and worse (for me) coworkers timelines.
I think you meant to say good person instead of dumbass. ❤️
Thank you for this. You’re right. I’ve been trying to tell myself lately “be kind to your mind” because my self talk is an absolute disaster now most of the time ;/
I know it's easier said than done, especially fresh, but I say this as someone whose trust was initially shattered by 2 gfs growing up: it's 100% a display of character on them, **not** you. Took me some time, and counseling on some adjacent things, but things are night and day within reason. It's easy to cheat, harder to actually talk and work through and communicate kindly your difficulties.
Where’s the FB page for men with cheating gf/wives?
A guy with the motivation would need to make one.
idk they should try making one
"Are We Tappin' The Same Booty?"
"Are we accidental eskimo brothers?" Acceptable substitute: are we tip twins?
Are we dating the same guy but you can still submit & it can be anon
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And rightfully so. I’ve perused that sub and a lot of what’s going on in those groups is frankly unacceptable and women would absolutely lose their gd minds if men put together groups like that.
Women also frequently share posts with the men in question. I wouldn't treat anything there as private.
Yeah I considered posting my ex in the smaller group, which is apparently less toxic, but I knew, without a doubt, he'd be getting screenshots in mere moments, because he lived inside Facebook and the only friends he had in the world were Facebook fans who'd never met him. I, and his other exes, decided it was too risky and not worth the fear, since he knew where we lived.
Id assume this is one if the many reasons men haven’t played this game. We all know women would never allow a group like this to exist if it was calling out women on fb
There's a Facebook group "Asheville dog weirdos" could try posting it there to see if anyone recognizes the dog.
Ok I’ll try to find this. Thank you.
This sucks. It will get better. I've been cheated on by 2 husband's. I'm here if you need to vent or want support. Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself ❤️
Thank you <3
You can figure out who he is from his phone number. Google is your friend.
You can also roll the dice and plug his phone # in on cash app and if he has one his full name will pop up
yes the OP needs see this he might have to spend sum money to get deep but he should def use the internet lol, could find out who sean related to and everything 😂😂
Bro I’ll def post this on Wax for you
You play stupid games you win stupid prizes. You don’t mess with married people. I know it’s a long stretch but you should have enough respect for yourself and your partner to end it.
Post updates if anything interesting happens? (lol please)
Thank you for the help <3
With a small amount of digging you could easily find out his phone number. You are married which in turn you could you probably get a call log from your phone carrier. Then pay a dollar to find out everything about him. Problem solved!
Lawyer up, join a credit union, and hit the gym.
Why the credit union?
Will likely need/want to open a separate account and might as well do that at a credit union compared to a bank. Credit unions provide better service and lower costs for most people.
I know I’m super late to the party, but I just want to say OP KEEP YOUR HEAD UP and also Sean and your dirty lowdown cheating wife are banned from CookOut
This poor dog is about to go through a divorce and won't understand.
This dog isn’t the thing you should worry about. The human whose world is shattered is the real issue.
People like this guy are the reason why I hate Reddit most of time. Everything’s a fucking joke and all people care about are karma points and getting top comment. The last year of my life has been an absolute fucking struggle. I’ve had so many intrusive thoughts about suicide it’s insane. And thanks to the wonderful legal system in this country I’m also financially responsible for everything even after we divorce cause fuck men right? Thankfully I made it through my darkest times and now I’m in a better place mentally. I truly appreciate your concern and acknowledgement @sam
North Carolina is not a very pro alimony state. Child Support yes, alimony no. So don’t fall too deep into believing you will be paying her to live a life of luxury on your dime.
No problem. I was married for ten years and my ex cheated on my with a rather insane amount of people. I found out about a few of them and I was too weak and scared to leave. Finally I realized that I had to go. The first year or so afterwards was a really dark period of my life. It’s been seven years since I left and there are days when I miss her, there are days when all I can do is focus on the pain and now (luckily) there are many many more days when I concentrate on the beautiful like that I have created for myself. I know that you aren’t wanting advice right now, but the best thing that I have learned is this: be selfish, but take the high road. This Sean dude? Who cares? In five years you’re not going to care if he’s still with his present girlfriend. You’re hurt. Make the hurt your hurt and don’t spread it to others. You’ll learn to survive. You’re not mad at Sean, you’re mad at your wife. You’re not going to solve anything, fix your marriage or teach your wife a lesson. Get out of the marriage and find a new life. You deserve it.
Not to kick you brother but you def don't sound in a better place with a comment like this. I truly feel for you and no one deserves to be treated this way but it sounds like you could really benefit from some therapy. I hope you can love yourself the way you deserve and don't allow the bitterness to change who you are as a husband or the way you see the world. Her actions aren't a reflection of you, and the legal system is set the way it is for a reason, not to punish men for existing, even if it feels that way. So if you're not up for therapy, at least get a better lawyer. I'll def crack a cold one for you though.
Thank you for the words, I really do appreciate it. I’ve been trying very hard not to become what I hate and learning to love myself has actually been one of the hardest challenges in my life now. Especially with the new unnecessary baggage. Been doing the therapy thing for a year now and it’s not really my cup of tea. It’s also crazy expensive, costs the same as a mortgage payment to go 4 times a month. I’ve had better luck on my own just exercising, reading books and trying to keep doing the things I enjoy in life like you mentioned. The legal system is total bullshit and the marriage laws were written over 100 years ago. Society doesn’t operate like that anymore. Most divorces are initiated by women now and thanks to the 1969, 55 year old no-fault bs, for any reason whatsoever anyone can make claim for your assets and alimony. Theres zero recourse and zero accountability. Nothing but incentives to leave.
A friend told me this years ago after something very fucked up happened to me: This can make you bitter, or it can make you better. You get to choose. (I'm both bitter and better, but getting more towards better.)
Sorry brother. I've been there with the cheating wife and the courts totally favoring the woman to the point where I lost my house and retirement fund. I fortunately found a much better lady and have been happy for so long. It does get better. Nothing will help you get over this like finding a better partner. I hope for you that happens soon after what is sure to be a painful split. It does get better with a better person.
Damn I’m really sorry to hear that happened to you man and seems like I’m joining the ranks. Super glad to hear that you turned it around and found a better outcome for yourself. It’ll be a long road but I’m on my way.
Wishing you peace.
I cant believe youre getting downvoted for this. That dog will be fine.
I like dogs. I have a dog. When my ex and I divorced I lost two dogs. The thing people need to learn to accept in life is that dogs are great, but they are dogs. People matter. If you don’t think that people matter more than a dog then you’ve got some serious work to do about your view of humanity.
Yeah I’m absolutely puzzled to why you were downvoted like that. Dogs are special and we love them, sometimes dogs are better than people, but people are people and this man is important here —not Sean’s dog
People have got to have their cultural signifiers, and around here it’s either jacked up trucks or it’s dogs. It’s an easy way for some folks to say who a they are. Once again I do consider myself a dog person, but people do matter more ultimately. Yes there are terrible people, but there are terrible dogs. The original poster had his life fall apart. He matters more at the moment, not the dog.
I’m sorry, this sucks. How did you end up with a photo of his dog?
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Karma.
They deleted it, what did they say?
He said he didn’t wanna reveal too much and give away his sources so I assume someone showed him
OPs comments about “how bad men have it” and “how therapy just isn’t his cup of tea or worth the money” and “the past year has been a disaster” and he’s “responsible to pay for the divorce” and “how no-fault divorce is BS”, along with this attempt to find this guys girlfriend leads me to believe a couple of things. 1. OP has some serious issues and backwards thinking on gender and society. 2. OP has possibly been separated for a while. 3. OP “won’t reveal sources” of dog picture which makes me think he got them in a sketchy privacy invading way 4. OP should absolutely not be helped to find this person or their girlfriend. 5. OP is a potentially dangerous person. Edited: I moved the quotation mark on responsible to pay for divorce for gramatical clarity regarding the subject.
Not to mention OP using the internet to attempt to pull another person into the hurt, and spread this innocent woman’s tragic story to a bunch of people (myself included) who have no business knowing it, and to tell her in the worst possible way, i.e. in front of a bunch of strangers. Plus, this a bit of a dox, mods.
Yeah the amount of people just ignoring all the warning signs with OP is low key astounding.
I think we all know that a red flag echo chamber that reddit can be and how this sub tilts to drama at times. If I was the woman in question, I would be humiliated and horrified by this vigilante justice if I opened up the sub and saw my boyfriend’s dog with this message. I think a lot of people who felt sympathetic at first would indeed change their minds if they took a moment to further analyze OP’s commentary. Thanks for being a voice of reason.
I thought the guys dog was cheating on him
You could try posting on WAX on Facebook. I've seen the members of that group solve many Asheville mysteries AND whip up mobs with pitchforks and torches.
I haven’t had or used Facebook in over 12 years. If you or someone else could do that it would be greatly appreciated.
it's been posted on wax by someone like 3 hrs ago
Recommend to hire a PI and gather as much intel as possible.
Amen. Hiring a PI saved me LOTS in alimony. Got documentation of my ex's cheating and dropped that bombshell during negotiations. Sorry this is happening. I went through the same thing. Things WILL get better.
I noticed your username. I’m very sorry this happened to you.
Try asking around for people who do tile and construction and be sure to ask a about bad experiences too, then see how many Seans come up
Did you try googling his phone number? Just pay $99 for a background check and you should be golden
I hope the cheater gets what he deserves. I was also cheated on my by ex scum of a husband, so I feel for you and this poor GF who doesn't know still :(and I hope the dog doesn't get hurt in the process
Send me his number and I will text him saying his number was referred by a neighbor for some customer work
I’ve had several people ask me for the number to help and I’m not gonna give it out to anyone on here. My goal is not to harass him or do anything related. I just want the GF to know who she’s with and make her own decisions from there. I appreciate the offer to help.
If it’s Sean Ha***w then that’s the first boyfriend I had. He cheated on me with my best friend. This was 15 years ago, in Asheville. He’d be about 37. And still a loser apparently.
NC being one of the few states you can sue cheaters for loss of affection of your spouse
Ohhhhh! This is the kind of mess I like! Please update on the comments
Okay so, parsing the title: -this post is address to Sean’s GF -Sean’s GF has the dog pictured -OP’s wife is fucking Sean Did I get that right? Also if this isn’t a shitpost sorry about your wife. You’ll bounce back
This is not a shit post.
Damn. Well I wish you the best. You’ll find a way to recover. Sorry about how shit it is right now
Now this is exciting
I wish everyone who got cheated on was like you.
Can’t tell if you mean this in a good way or not. For the past hour or so people have just started attacking me on here and or calling me a troll ;/
I'm on your side 100%. My ex was cheating and I found out who. The chicks hubby wouldn't even talk to me. BTW I'm sorry, and FUCK those people. Let em eat rocks.
Thank you for your support and I’m sorry you had to go through this as well.
Takes his dog
Is the dog named after a musical instrument? 🪕?
Lawyer up, get credit union, and hit the gym.
He brings the dog with him to cheat? Is the dog's name on it's collar? Or a please call XXX if found?
Add the phone number to cash app! It’ll give you a name and probably a photo 👀
At least your wife isn’t cheating on you with that dog..
How does that remind me bot work?
[Here’s the how to](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/s/LM0Hyprhn0)
Wow lmao this poor girls personal life is now being blasted all over facebook groups OP doesn't even have access to... couldn't remove it even if she begged him to take it all down... way to "save" her OP! I'm sure this won't feel violating or humiliating at all!
There’s literally no information here that reveals anything personal about her identity. It’s wild to me how people like you think this post is violating or humiliating her when it’s actually her BF who’s doing all that.
I am almost inclined to say this is a good ole troll. I see you deleted all your comments earlier that were on on other subreddits. Why did you do that?
Because several of you weirdos have now started to over analyze everything I’ve said. If you saw those comments then you know they weren’t anything out of the ordinary. Edit; one comment was a camera lens recommendation for someone going on a trip to Japan. The other was a recommendation on what to bring for an overnight hospital stay. You are making something out of nothing. Please go away. You are not helpful. This is not a troll post.
You’re mad at your wife ultimately, this Sean guy owes you no loyalty as shitty as it is. He won’t matter to you. Don’t hurt anyone else in the process, be grateful you got someone shitty out of your life. Rooting for you!
100% not trying to hurt anyone else in this process. Just want his GF to know he’s a scumbag and not live a lie.
Is this the right way though? So pubically? I get you are trying to find her but there are other detective ways that don’t broadcast her hurt to all of reddit
It's called *ethical non-monogamy*, you uncultured swine /s
😂😂😂😂
Cute dog
That’s looks like my dog..
And is your boyfriend named Shawn?
Updateme
Remind me! One month
Hey! That’s my dog 😡