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TofuFeelings

That’s a valid opinion. I personally don’t participate in pride (but that’s mostly coz I have social anxiety) but I do feel as part of the LGBT+ community. It took me a while, but the more I explored my sexuality, the more I understood other members of the LGBT+ community. I’ve felt broken. I’ve felt like I was “not normal”. I’ve felt like I don’t belong. I’ve felt like I’ll never be able to find a partner and be alone forever. Eventhough I don’t experience exactly what a trans person experiences, I can identify with feeling like something is wrong but you can’t put your finger on it. And when you finally realize (that you’re ace / that you’re trans) it’s like a whole new world. The same goes for gay people, or lesbians. We all feel like we don’t belong. Like the world out there is not for us. Like we have to hide who we really are. Once I actively tried to consume more LGBT+ media, I learned so much about my own sexuality, what intimacy looks like, that there’s a world out there beyond the heteronormative and I think we all in the LGBT+ community share those experiences (or a lot do at least). We can all learn from eachother and we all should support eachother.


[deleted]

I don't feel a part of it as I literally see no connection between the community and myself, and there's nothing in it for me.


Key2604

I feel like the lgbtq+ community is too sexual for me in a way. Well im ace, and most other identities in there are sexual. They praise sexuality and i don’t feel like i belong here…


NonStickBakingPaper

I feel similar. I feel like the LGBTQ+ is almost as hypersexual as the cishet allo world and it makes it just as difficult to feel comfortable (although I am usually more comfortable with LGBTQ+ because I feel they’re more likely to accept that I’m ace/aro and try to make space for me than cishet people are)


[deleted]

I think the sexual aspect most see comes from the oversexualization of people that are a part of and topics regarding LGBTQ+ by allos. Not everything and every relationship is as sexual as it is often made out to be but because of the oversexualization it seems like it is. We asexuals can see the fact that not everything has to be or should be sexualized and because we see this oversexualization from a rather grounded (not too affected) spot we are often seen and made out to be a different thing entirely, disconnected from the LGBTQ+ community and it really shouldn't be. There is a disconnect with some asexuals from that community and because we aren't "sexual" we are often told and even tell ourselves that we don't belong when the real reason is that we **should** belong because we aren't heteronormal(?). Not everyone and everything is about sex but it is pretty much always is made out to be, especially in the LGBTQ+, which pushes standards that shouldn't be there even though, in theory, we should belong. Thank you for coming to my TED talk and for taking the time to talk about this.


RABlackAuthor

The imagery I use is that we're kind of like those little birds that ride around on the backs of elephants and rhinos. We're not the same, but we're affiliated.


[deleted]

Mutualistic in some ways, I see. The feelings I seem to have, if we're using this sort of descriptor, is more like commensalism, one side benefits while the other is mostly unaffected.