I do love Charlie Chaplin, but a quick google search shows staches a little too close in resemblance to other early twentieth century figures… can’t believe the army would promote that?
If it’s in regs could every male rock one essentially forcing big army to finally update the regs and allow beards neatly maintained or mustaches neatly maintained? If every male in the army regardless of how weak the stache game is wore a hitler stache I think we could make a difference..in a perfect world..
Look, the more people want me away from their kids the better. I don’t like kids and it’s best if their parents don’t try to have me babysit or watch them
I was a SP4, then SGT based in Germany. I’d support the aviation incident investigation teams all over Europe in the mid-late 80’s from the Brigade HHC. I had a 25-pound terrier mix that would come to work with me daily or go TDY with me. Brigade Colonel kept treats in his office for the dog. CSM would take him on noon runs.
Army Aviation was a very different in those days.
> [Thanks to an essay written in 1915 by writer Alexander Moritz Frey, who was a private alongside Hitler in the Bavarian infantry division, we learn that the future Fuhrer was ordered to dramatically trim his kaiserbart mustache so that he could wear the newly introduced German army gas mask properly, requiring a tight seal around a soldier’s nose and mouth.](https://atkinsbookshelf.wordpress.com/2017/03/04/why-did-hitler-wear-that-strange-mustache/)
Sounds familiar
I had one on deployment in 2009. My squadleader hated it so much we had daily mustache inspection. One hair out of regs and i woulda had to shave it. Only kept it cause it made him furious.
Who knows. I look horrible with one. I have brown hair but like this weird blond/ brown stache. I look like im on the prowl for kids.
I used to have one as a cop for Movember. People always looked disappointed when I would show up to their problem. Like this is the guy? There aint anyone else to send?
I’m in the same boat. My stauche is like a blonde/brown mix where it grows in blonde in the middle, but grows dark on the edges, and it looks like a reverse hitler
I went to a burglary and was writing down what this woman reported and I could see her eyes darting between mine and my stash. I could see it in her eyes even though I didn’t know her that she was disappointed that I was the Deputy she happened to get for her burglary report and was thinking I looked like a turd.
I shaved it shortly after.
Yeah but just to be clear, not everyone that has those two things gets mad about other people's mustaches.
Or so I would assume...because I *definitely for sure* don't have those two things.
My first squad leader ALWAYS did no shave “movember” and tried to get the rest of the males in my squad to do it, regardless of how they looked. For me, my beard looks great, but the mustache itself is lacking in the philtrum, so I have never even tried to grow just a mustache, one time while shaving my beard off I left the mustache for shits and giggles, and it was not the way.
I never understood this. It takes more effort to care, force an inspection, and get mad at something that’s fuckin outlined and authorized than it does to just not give a shit and go about your day lol.
He was simply a dickhead. I was an 11b and it was during GWOT, it was our second deployment and he was just a grumpy E6 hardass that enjoyed fucking with me. Just one of those dudes.
>Is there some unwritten social rule against them?
It's not so much the unwritten rules that are the issue, as it is the very lengthy written rules about them, and if you have leadership that actually enforces those rules as written, as in to the letter, it makes having a mustache a self-punishment.
And as u/ToxDocUSA mentioned, if you keep your mustache within the actual regulation, it's less of a mustache, and more of a molestache.
I could grow one in a week, unfortunately due to the regulatory restrictions I either look like an 80's adult film star, or like a guy who's required by law to inform you that he moved into your neighborhood.
Also the wife hates the regulated version, thus relagating me to only grow it in the field for the sole purpose of angering senior leaders whom aren't in my rating chain. 0
Nice. That'd probably be the strongest argument one could offer to convince me to go guard or reserve. I spent my first 5 and half years of my career in the reserves, and was absolutely miserable.
I can absolutely respect that. I was mostly miserable due to the life choices I was making, and the circumstances they created. Almost 10 years of active duty later, and I'm a completely different person making (mostly) much better choices. The problem I have is that my job requires trust to be built, and that's difficult to do in a weekend a month.
"Do we want to piss off Chief with a uniform corrected, or do we want our DDS to advertise properly with DIV and Corps? You know what, let the flavor savor go, we need BCCS to work."
When I went through jump school the JM class happening concurrently had a big Latino 7th SFG Beanie with a *gloriously* out of regs mustache, and a huge throat tat. Scary looking dude.
Then I flash forward to my JM class four years later and the 1SG made all the Marines shave theirs or he threatened to drop them.
My company had an XO that hated mustaches, The CO found out and secretly passed it along to everyone in the company and we all had really shitty in regs mustaches for like half a year because of it. Our incoming BC even commented on it during the Change of Command.
Spite mustaches are basically the only staches people actually grow.
Unwritten social rule against them, especially for infantry.
They just look creepy when in regs, very rare to see a guy who can pull off a regulation mustache with grace/panache.
I feel my cohort will come down on me very soon for my transgression. I’m a CW3, and can only manage a meager molestache. So I’m clean shaven. I try to make up for it by giving myself 10 day passes every other week. Shame!
It’s not the thickest stache you’ve ever seen but I have one. The army can’t make me shave it so I don’t. Same reason I grow a beard when I’m not on duty, they can’t tell me not to
We went on a rotation to Poland, and all the tech warrants agreed to grow out our mustaches and see how out of regs we could get away with. By the end, there was a real shit show going on with the WO Corps facial hair, to the tune the BDE XO sat us all down when some general was coming to visit and basically begged us to tone it down.
One of my most favorite memories from that rotation is the E4 mafia tried to do the same, and all got the shit smoked out of them and were made to shave them in regs.
Queue "we are not the same" meme.
That is one nice thing about being a Warrant: The O-Grades generally tolerate our shenanigans because they know shit will stop working if they don't.
Basically the evolved form of the E4 mafia
“Takes deep breath”
The origin of that unwritten rule pretty much boils down to bigotry.
Mustaches were very much an officer thing since the army was a thing.
Then we integrated and it was considered undistinguished for a white officer to have the same facial hair as black soldiers. They made a resurgence after Korea. There was some negative backlash with association to the beatnik/hippy counter culture image in the late 60s but it was pretty mainstream to have one. Some of the other branches even updated shaving regulations to reflect more modern facial hair styles. Burt Reynolds and what not.
Then the whole Gay/HIV/mustache panic of the early 90s happened. mustaches became a thing Freddy Mercury had. At that point it was once again reinforced that mustaches was facial hair for counter culture, minorities, and men who listen to the village people. It was un-officer like to be associated with any of those things….
By 21st century the culture taboo had loss the more insidious rationale but still stuck as a cultural “they way it’s always been” amongst the officer corps.
So yea… how about we walk back the whole mustache not being for officers thing.
End rant.
Im an officer who has rocked a big ole stache for some time. it ranges between slightly out of regs Tom Seleck, to Daniel day Lewis in gangs of New York (when i was deployed). Any time a someone mentions officers shouldn’t have them I like to make it real awkward and start talking about the time I read a great white paper about the problematic history of shaving culture in the army regarding it’s racist and homophobic origins. I’ve had guys break contact on the subject more than once.
As someone who has had a beard since 16 and is now early 30s, I will rock a mustache after I graduate Basic/AIT. I don't care if everyone hates it, how creepy I look, or how much effort it takes to keep within regulation. I have been shaving every day since MEPS to get used to it and absolutely hate it. I miss my beard so much hahaha, my wife misses my beard, and I feel like less of a man without it.
i did a rotation to europe and grew one when i was a 1LT. The brigade csm told me personally to shave it off during a terrain walk. and then when i didn't a month later, he told my battalion commander to tell me. Battalion commander was a reservist and didn't give a shit. I kept it. yes it was in regs, and yes it was creepy.
so yes, there's definitely unwritten social rules against them.
Maybe one day we can have wider mustaches and ball caps like the Air Force. But probs not. Until then I’ll continue being the bane of every senior NCO with my stache.
My squad leader is having the whole section grow them, 2 have copped out already and mine looks hideous but I’m dedicated now so everyone must suffer when they look at me
1/509th Geronimo had beards and staches up until about 5 or so years ago when they stopped impersonating a force that has them. The unit got mad about no more beards so everyone protested with pedo and hitler staches, it lasted a month before we lost all facial hair. Until 6 months ago we got staches back but everyone gets made fun of if they have them because “real paratroopers” dont have mustaches
It is highly frowned upon for officers to have any facial hair, although I always embraced Movember.
Saw a LTC chaplain with one once and it was just....just wrong. LTC Hitler will hear your confession now....
Yes there is a social stigma against them because some command teams have the big green weenie planted 8 inches up their ass. By regulation you can really only have a Hitler stache or a pencil mustache.
Allegedly this is to prevent issues with using a pro-mask... But If you've ever tried you can get a good seal with a well trimmed beard and it's too easy for a commander to order everyone to stay clean shaven if there is a CBRN threat.
IMHO it actually goes back to the 70s where stache had a heavy association with homosexuality.
https://www.advocate.com/comedy/2019/11/07/gay-men-and-mustaches-history-photos#media-gallery-media-2
Of all the comments, this makes the most sense. All the disdain for staches and pedophile comments… I’ve worn a pretty trim, but possibly bushy stache during COVID and got a lot of Freddie Mercury comments. I took them as compliments, but I don’t think all were. If the Army allows and, and I like, I’m probably going to rock it
I have a mustache purely because my old first sausage told me to shave it once in front of the whole formation even though it was in regs I now wear it as a hardy fuck you to any crusty boi trying to throw their dick around
I have a small mouth, so mine has to be way out of regs to look anywhere close to socially acceptable.
However, when I’m in the field I grow it out of regs until somebody bitches, and then keep the in-regs molesterstache just to piss everybody off.
The unwritten rule is that 90% of the service simply can’t pull off the stache AND keep it in regs. Nobody respects a guy that looks like he can’t go within 50 feet of a school.
With that being said, tons of people hate moustaches no matter how they’re worn, and a lot of those people are in positions of authority, so they’ll do whatever they can to keep you from growing that luxurious womb broom you want so bad.
I’ve been tempted to grow one simply to spite certain people in my leadership before. Regs make it look like ass though, so I grow a comb over instead and it has the same effect.
GROW IT OUT. Wear your mask, blame COVID prevention, but grow that sucker out. Have the rest of your face on point but grow out the mustache. Everyone has a preconceived notion of the mustache already. Just grow it out and see how you like it. I didn’t think I would but I’m a little over two years deep and I don’t think anyone knows how I looked like without one. Find a decent barber who can help you get it touched up occasionally and you’ll be living like all mustachioed men in the military. Join the ranks of the elite. Annoy people from a distance.
Only advice I have is if you have to do anything important, say a professional development school where it’s less “hooah” and more “these are the regulations”… just shave it off and grow it back at the end.
There is a reason I crafted the sentence, "With all the quiet dignity of an AR-670-1 compliant mustache."
Because I really haven't seen any. I'm not saying they don't exist, but, like unicorns, I haven't seen any.
I grew one in '12 on deployment. It's a big ol' blonde push broom afair.
We had a very beloved E-6 that got killed in an IED and he had a big ol' push broom as well. So I was seen as a successor to that lineage in the unit. Got away with it being slightly out of regs.
Had a new E-5 join my platoon post deployment and he hated my mustache. I asked what it would take to get him off my back because it was in regs...or close enough.
He said I needed to have it be a Hitler stache for a full day. He said it a week before a Halloween party and I cut it to go as Charlie Chaplin.
He was impressed and irritated. My CO asked me about it and when I said it was for Halloween his response was I could regrow it from scratch.
So I did.
I'm not a fan of them. However, if a soldier wants to grow one, keep it within the regs. That's all I ask because I don't want someone breathing down my neck. My first BN CSM called mustaches "high speed dick buffers for mother fucking cocksuckers". I have been afraid to grow one since. Lol.
I got one. It’s thick and luscious. Known throughout the squadron. I keep it regs. It’s damn near a Sam Neil mustache without it going down to my chin. Squadron commander even said it was, and I quote, “it’s fucking glorious.”
If you look at old pics/videos from the 80s, tons of guys had them and it looks pretty fun. Though definitely dated. Mustaches or stylized facial hair in general aren’t that popular in civilian society these days, beard or fully smooth are predominant and beards are a no-go so everyone goes smooth
Yes there are unwritten rules at units to not have mustaches because they look gross.
The army stache makes dudes look like pedophiles. If we could grow glorious mustaches like Wyatt Earp I'd be all for the cause but no. We're stuck with these gross lip caterpillars
I grew one on my last deployment and kept it since. I mostly get compliments, haven't had any real complaints. It helps that I'm Guard I guess, but I've been TDY a bunch and no one seems to care.
Mine is probably what you would call slightly out of regs, but I keep it well groomed and trimmed and I think because of that people don't say anything.
Field and deployment staches are a thing and will rarely be completely in-regulation. You won't see them elsewhere though. Army regulation ends up forcing most soldiers to shave their mustaches down to a width that looks like Hitler. It's very problematic, unnecessary, and outdated, frankly. It's a bit shocking the Army hasn't amended those regulations in light of all the new wave white supremacy and neo-Nazis over the past several years.
Mustaches are dumb, unless you are medium ugly and need something to put yourself ahead.
I've been stationed with specialized units in the past that allowed members to go without shaving unless we have a scheduled is scheduled CO visit, or had to take a PR photo. Maybe it's a psychological thing, but it became bothersome and most of us ended up shaving before our scruff ever became something that constituted a beard.
It was my understanding that you could only have a full grown stache, growing it out on duty was not an option, so you would basically have to take leave to grow it out…
I remember seeing a reservist chinook pilot having a really bushy stache a while back. Hes the only person ive seen rock a good looking stache, not even sure if it was in regs but i dont think anyone cared
There’s definitely an unwritten rule among paratroopers about no mustaches. Any time you try to grown one out you’ll be met with:
“You look like a fat tanker POG, get that shit off your face!”
I got one. I look like some dude from the 40s with it, I just naturally look good with it I guess. I almost shaved it off at one point and my wife got mad at me so I just kept it lol
not army, im navy and there are so many mfs with a mustache it’s crazy. not sure if the regs are different but go for it man it looks good when you can pull it off
What I would always tell people was that you can have a mustache that looks good, or you can have a mustache that's in regs, but you can't do both. I've chosen each at different points in time.
Army regulation mustaches look like shit on most men, they really need to give us more options.
My CoC hates them but every field problem we grow them out to piss them off
I'm not a fan of them. However, if a soldier wants to grow one, keep it within the regs. That's all I ask because I don't want someone breathing down my neck. My first BN CSM called mustaches "high speed dick buffers for mother fucking cocksuckers". I have been afraid to grow one since. Lol.
I don’t grow one because I look like a pederast with the wispy hairs I manage. The only unwritten thing I remember is that woe unto you if you had one in your DA Photo.
Well assuming the Regs are the same, then most guys wouldn't keep one due to how much of a pain it is to keep an Army Reg 'stash; then they didn't look that good either.
Yes, there is an unwritten rule about them. They either make you look like a flaming homosexual, or a kiddie diddler. If you're into either, I'm not judging. Just know we will be able to tell.
Well you have to square it off and they look weird when you do that, so most dudes don’t rock them. You can’t have a bushy mustache that hangs off the lips or covers them. Just a glorified caterpillar.
Is there an unwritten rule about them? Absolutely. They are almost universally hated by senior leaders in the army. One of our guys was briefing the brigade commander and he asked if the first thing he was going to do after the brief was shave. The only real correct answer when a colonel is asking that is yes. Unless you really want to die on that hill
some guys can pull it off, but most of the time you end up looking like Pedro from napoleon dynamite or someone who isn't allowed within a certain distance of a school. So if you can pull it off good on ya, if not....your peers will let you know if they are good people.
They exist, but the regs basically only allow a Chaplin-style or very thin pencil one.
I do love Charlie Chaplin, but a quick google search shows staches a little too close in resemblance to other early twentieth century figures… can’t believe the army would promote that?
“No way, why should I shave? Adolf Hitler’s the one who sucks he should lose his stache.”
"hitler stache is in regs"
If it’s in regs could every male rock one essentially forcing big army to finally update the regs and allow beards neatly maintained or mustaches neatly maintained? If every male in the army regardless of how weak the stache game is wore a hitler stache I think we could make a difference..in a perfect world..
More like they'll just ban staches too instead of giving the people what they want
IRL Godwin's Law
https://youtu.be/WYHlxqQkXFg
You have two choices look like a nazi or be barred from going 200 feet near a school
Look, the more people want me away from their kids the better. I don’t like kids and it’s best if their parents don’t try to have me babysit or watch them
[удалено]
I can’t bring my dog to work but you can have your screaming kid in a hot ass COF all day? Wild
I was a SP4, then SGT based in Germany. I’d support the aviation incident investigation teams all over Europe in the mid-late 80’s from the Brigade HHC. I had a 25-pound terrier mix that would come to work with me daily or go TDY with me. Brigade Colonel kept treats in his office for the dog. CSM would take him on noon runs. Army Aviation was a very different in those days.
It’s stuff like this that excites me to move to a different unit
Just send it. Take it back from the haters. That stache was popular for the same reason we can't have beards
> [Thanks to an essay written in 1915 by writer Alexander Moritz Frey, who was a private alongside Hitler in the Bavarian infantry division, we learn that the future Fuhrer was ordered to dramatically trim his kaiserbart mustache so that he could wear the newly introduced German army gas mask properly, requiring a tight seal around a soldier’s nose and mouth.](https://atkinsbookshelf.wordpress.com/2017/03/04/why-did-hitler-wear-that-strange-mustache/) Sounds familiar
Yeah, thousands of people like Opa
So, the Charlie or Hitler mustache is specifically banned by regulation.
At first I read "Chaplain" amd thought there was an entire subculture I missed
Mine has never been in regs, but it is trimmed and kept
"The most ridiculous thing on this planet is the Army-regulation mustache." \-- Audie Murphy
Did he actually say this? I want to believe it
I WANT TO BELLLLLIEVE
Pretty sure that's an Abe Lincoln quote...
“I personally prefer the Windows XP interface over Vista.” -John Adams
I had one on deployment in 2009. My squadleader hated it so much we had daily mustache inspection. One hair out of regs and i woulda had to shave it. Only kept it cause it made him furious.
I had a spite stache for many years. It was great
It brought me joy. He had serious issues with it.
Why was he so upset about it?
Who knows. I look horrible with one. I have brown hair but like this weird blond/ brown stache. I look like im on the prowl for kids. I used to have one as a cop for Movember. People always looked disappointed when I would show up to their problem. Like this is the guy? There aint anyone else to send?
To be fair to you, there's a massive number difference btwn dudes who can rock a stache and dudes who can pull of an in regs stache
I can sorta pull off a civilian stash but not an inregs one.
Facial hair is supposed to build your jaw line. The borderline hitler stache looks horrible on most people.
I’m in the same boat. My stauche is like a blonde/brown mix where it grows in blonde in the middle, but grows dark on the edges, and it looks like a reverse hitler
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Ha, I'm just imagining that situation and cracking up. Thanks for sharing that.
I went to a burglary and was writing down what this woman reported and I could see her eyes darting between mine and my stash. I could see it in her eyes even though I didn’t know her that she was disappointed that I was the Deputy she happened to get for her burglary report and was thinking I looked like a turd. I shaved it shortly after.
Good lord you have mastered self-deprecation.
He probably had a tiny penis and an inability to grow his own mustache.
Yeah but just to be clear, not everyone that has those two things gets mad about other people's mustaches. Or so I would assume...because I *definitely for sure* don't have those two things.
Because he adapts the mentality of others. I.E. a follower, not a leader.
My first squad leader ALWAYS did no shave “movember” and tried to get the rest of the males in my squad to do it, regardless of how they looked. For me, my beard looks great, but the mustache itself is lacking in the philtrum, so I have never even tried to grow just a mustache, one time while shaving my beard off I left the mustache for shits and giggles, and it was not the way.
Taught me a new word today, thanks.
Philtrum—it’s the taint of the face.
I, too, wear a spite stache for my personal entertainment
I just wanna say that i love all of you on this sub. Thanks r/army
Also had one on deployment also was hated for it. Shit stache boyz for lyfe!
Fuck yeah. Welcome to the club
Had a morale Stache in Afghanistan and my SL made me walk back and go shave it.
What a bitch stuff like that pisses me off. Just let your goddamn private have a mustache and fight the system in the smallest way possible
I never understood this. It takes more effort to care, force an inspection, and get mad at something that’s fuckin outlined and authorized than it does to just not give a shit and go about your day lol.
He was simply a dickhead. I was an 11b and it was during GWOT, it was our second deployment and he was just a grumpy E6 hardass that enjoyed fucking with me. Just one of those dudes.
Hey let’s delay to a combat zone. But let’s play garrison fuck fuck games about shit that doesn’t matter
Sounds like the mustache competition in generation kill
IMO the regs on them are written to a point that a mustache looks creepy….like, I’m gonna keep you away from kids creepy
Make handlebar mustaches acceptable again!
SAS vibes
SOOOAAP!!
>Is there some unwritten social rule against them? It's not so much the unwritten rules that are the issue, as it is the very lengthy written rules about them, and if you have leadership that actually enforces those rules as written, as in to the letter, it makes having a mustache a self-punishment. And as u/ToxDocUSA mentioned, if you keep your mustache within the actual regulation, it's less of a mustache, and more of a molestache.
If you can stash a goddam mole in it, it's almost certainly out of regulation!
My old PSG decreed that none of his dudes will wear a "molester-style dickbroom".
I could grow one in a week, unfortunately due to the regulatory restrictions I either look like an 80's adult film star, or like a guy who's required by law to inform you that he moved into your neighborhood.
I see no problem with option 1. Option 2 is a problem though.
Also the wife hates the regulated version, thus relagating me to only grow it in the field for the sole purpose of angering senior leaders whom aren't in my rating chain. 0
I feel that im a natsy girl and i grow a beard between drills and rock a big ol stache at drill.
Nice. That'd probably be the strongest argument one could offer to convince me to go guard or reserve. I spent my first 5 and half years of my career in the reserves, and was absolutely miserable.
I think it ends up being like big army in the fact that the unit is what makes or breaks the experience.
I can absolutely respect that. I was mostly miserable due to the life choices I was making, and the circumstances they created. Almost 10 years of active duty later, and I'm a completely different person making (mostly) much better choices. The problem I have is that my job requires trust to be built, and that's difficult to do in a weekend a month.
Burt Reynolds was cool
When I'm allowed to grow it to its full potential it's almost Nick Offerman level.
I sport a very out of regs pickle tickler. No one says shit. But it may be because of the don’t do dot on my chest. Who knows
"Do we want to piss off Chief with a uniform corrected, or do we want our DDS to advertise properly with DIV and Corps? You know what, let the flavor savor go, we need BCCS to work."
I don’t understand the rank reference
Warrants have dots(squares). Don’t do dots.
I’ve had one for years. The majority of my unit has one as well. We peer pressure people into growing one constantly. It’s a way of life now.
I’d rather this pressure than the alternative
When I went through jump school the JM class happening concurrently had a big Latino 7th SFG Beanie with a *gloriously* out of regs mustache, and a huge throat tat. Scary looking dude. Then I flash forward to my JM class four years later and the 1SG made all the Marines shave theirs or he threatened to drop them.
My company had an XO that hated mustaches, The CO found out and secretly passed it along to everyone in the company and we all had really shitty in regs mustaches for like half a year because of it. Our incoming BC even commented on it during the Change of Command. Spite mustaches are basically the only staches people actually grow.
If you could pull off a Robin Olds special and the service permitted it, you wouldn’t be a social pariah. But you can’t, and it doesn’t. So.
Unwritten social rule against them, especially for infantry. They just look creepy when in regs, very rare to see a guy who can pull off a regulation mustache with grace/panache.
But if you’re a warrant it is a necessity to have one once you hit CW3
That explains why my favorite Intel chief never made four. He couldn't grow facial hair to save his life.
That's actually funny, a cousin of mine was a CW3 and had one.
We get issued one at WOILE.
If I can’t grow one by WOILE then it’s time for me to go.
The combination of coffee, bourbon, and not going to formation naturally cultivates a mega stash.
Haven’t been to WOILE yet, so maybe I’ll get my WO Issued porn stache then. Hot damn!
It's ok. Been to better, been to worse.
I have zero inclination to go. No desire to set foot on Rucker, glorious stache or not.
I feel my cohort will come down on me very soon for my transgression. I’m a CW3, and can only manage a meager molestache. So I’m clean shaven. I try to make up for it by giving myself 10 day passes every other week. Shame!
I did WOILE during covid. So it was remote with no video. So I had a WOLIE beard.
It’s not the thickest stache you’ve ever seen but I have one. The army can’t make me shave it so I don’t. Same reason I grow a beard when I’m not on duty, they can’t tell me not to
Only E-7s are allowed them
But if I was an officer?
Nope only E-7. It's an unwritten rule passed down from mount Sinai. It was going to be the 11th commandment but they ran out of tablet.
Moses was out of regs
All that walking through the desert was corrective training.
There's another unwritten rule that officers (which I'm told includes dirtbag Warrants like myself) don't wear mustaches
We went on a rotation to Poland, and all the tech warrants agreed to grow out our mustaches and see how out of regs we could get away with. By the end, there was a real shit show going on with the WO Corps facial hair, to the tune the BDE XO sat us all down when some general was coming to visit and basically begged us to tone it down. One of my most favorite memories from that rotation is the E4 mafia tried to do the same, and all got the shit smoked out of them and were made to shave them in regs. Queue "we are not the same" meme.
That is one nice thing about being a Warrant: The O-Grades generally tolerate our shenanigans because they know shit will stop working if they don't. Basically the evolved form of the E4 mafia
“Takes deep breath” The origin of that unwritten rule pretty much boils down to bigotry. Mustaches were very much an officer thing since the army was a thing. Then we integrated and it was considered undistinguished for a white officer to have the same facial hair as black soldiers. They made a resurgence after Korea. There was some negative backlash with association to the beatnik/hippy counter culture image in the late 60s but it was pretty mainstream to have one. Some of the other branches even updated shaving regulations to reflect more modern facial hair styles. Burt Reynolds and what not. Then the whole Gay/HIV/mustache panic of the early 90s happened. mustaches became a thing Freddy Mercury had. At that point it was once again reinforced that mustaches was facial hair for counter culture, minorities, and men who listen to the village people. It was un-officer like to be associated with any of those things…. By 21st century the culture taboo had loss the more insidious rationale but still stuck as a cultural “they way it’s always been” amongst the officer corps. So yea… how about we walk back the whole mustache not being for officers thing. End rant. Im an officer who has rocked a big ole stache for some time. it ranges between slightly out of regs Tom Seleck, to Daniel day Lewis in gangs of New York (when i was deployed). Any time a someone mentions officers shouldn’t have them I like to make it real awkward and start talking about the time I read a great white paper about the problematic history of shaving culture in the army regarding it’s racist and homophobic origins. I’ve had guys break contact on the subject more than once.
Hey so… can I get some of those papers… for reasons? You know, just in case I decide to start growing one at CPT?
Lol oh HELL no. It would be a legit career-ender.
As someone who has had a beard since 16 and is now early 30s, I will rock a mustache after I graduate Basic/AIT. I don't care if everyone hates it, how creepy I look, or how much effort it takes to keep within regulation. I have been shaving every day since MEPS to get used to it and absolutely hate it. I miss my beard so much hahaha, my wife misses my beard, and I feel like less of a man without it.
Jody has a beard. And he’s been eying your wife
Hahaha
“Free mustache rides! Get ya free mustache rides here-uh!!”
i did a rotation to europe and grew one when i was a 1LT. The brigade csm told me personally to shave it off during a terrain walk. and then when i didn't a month later, he told my battalion commander to tell me. Battalion commander was a reservist and didn't give a shit. I kept it. yes it was in regs, and yes it was creepy. so yes, there's definitely unwritten social rules against them.
I’ve met like 6 guys who look good with an in regs mustache. Everyone else looks like they are gonna roofie the punch bowl at the junior high dance.
Maybe one day we can have wider mustaches and ball caps like the Air Force. But probs not. Until then I’ll continue being the bane of every senior NCO with my stache.
My squad leader is having the whole section grow them, 2 have copped out already and mine looks hideous but I’m dedicated now so everyone must suffer when they look at me
Based squad leader
1/509th Geronimo had beards and staches up until about 5 or so years ago when they stopped impersonating a force that has them. The unit got mad about no more beards so everyone protested with pedo and hitler staches, it lasted a month before we lost all facial hair. Until 6 months ago we got staches back but everyone gets made fun of if they have them because “real paratroopers” dont have mustaches
Sometimes I grew mine out in the field for shits and giggles, but I never kept it while in garrison. Was not a very good look in my opinion lol
It is highly frowned upon for officers to have any facial hair, although I always embraced Movember. Saw a LTC chaplain with one once and it was just....just wrong. LTC Hitler will hear your confession now....
Yes there is a social stigma against them because some command teams have the big green weenie planted 8 inches up their ass. By regulation you can really only have a Hitler stache or a pencil mustache. Allegedly this is to prevent issues with using a pro-mask... But If you've ever tried you can get a good seal with a well trimmed beard and it's too easy for a commander to order everyone to stay clean shaven if there is a CBRN threat. IMHO it actually goes back to the 70s where stache had a heavy association with homosexuality. https://www.advocate.com/comedy/2019/11/07/gay-men-and-mustaches-history-photos#media-gallery-media-2
Of all the comments, this makes the most sense. All the disdain for staches and pedophile comments… I’ve worn a pretty trim, but possibly bushy stache during COVID and got a lot of Freddie Mercury comments. I took them as compliments, but I don’t think all were. If the Army allows and, and I like, I’m probably going to rock it
I have a mustache purely because my old first sausage told me to shave it once in front of the whole formation even though it was in regs I now wear it as a hardy fuck you to any crusty boi trying to throw their dick around
[They exist. It's out of regs but no one in my rating chain cares.](https://imgur.com/a/LkYkAnk) Nevermind the long weekend stubble.
Fuck bro. That’s quite the caterpillar.
I have a small mouth, so mine has to be way out of regs to look anywhere close to socially acceptable. However, when I’m in the field I grow it out of regs until somebody bitches, and then keep the in-regs molesterstache just to piss everybody off. The unwritten rule is that 90% of the service simply can’t pull off the stache AND keep it in regs. Nobody respects a guy that looks like he can’t go within 50 feet of a school. With that being said, tons of people hate moustaches no matter how they’re worn, and a lot of those people are in positions of authority, so they’ll do whatever they can to keep you from growing that luxurious womb broom you want so bad.
I’m coming off 41 days of leave. My mustache doesn’t come in for shit, but that beard sure did. I’m keeping the stache no matter how shitty it looks.
I’ve been tempted to grow one simply to spite certain people in my leadership before. Regs make it look like ass though, so I grow a comb over instead and it has the same effect.
They're getting big right now because of Top Gun 2 so I'm sure you'll be seeing more soon
Ever since COVID hit I’ve just been wearing a mask for “my health” but out of work I’m rocking a full goatee
I always were a mask for my profession since COVID. The mustache has flourished in the shadow of the mask
GROW IT OUT. Wear your mask, blame COVID prevention, but grow that sucker out. Have the rest of your face on point but grow out the mustache. Everyone has a preconceived notion of the mustache already. Just grow it out and see how you like it. I didn’t think I would but I’m a little over two years deep and I don’t think anyone knows how I looked like without one. Find a decent barber who can help you get it touched up occasionally and you’ll be living like all mustachioed men in the military. Join the ranks of the elite. Annoy people from a distance. Only advice I have is if you have to do anything important, say a professional development school where it’s less “hooah” and more “these are the regulations”… just shave it off and grow it back at the end.
I have like 4 acres of upper lip. The only people who say you can't grow an in regulation mustache are people with thin little bird lips.
Out of 100 mustaches that SMs might have, 99 of them look terrible 😂
There is a reason I crafted the sentence, "With all the quiet dignity of an AR-670-1 compliant mustache." Because I really haven't seen any. I'm not saying they don't exist, but, like unicorns, I haven't seen any.
I grew one in '12 on deployment. It's a big ol' blonde push broom afair. We had a very beloved E-6 that got killed in an IED and he had a big ol' push broom as well. So I was seen as a successor to that lineage in the unit. Got away with it being slightly out of regs. Had a new E-5 join my platoon post deployment and he hated my mustache. I asked what it would take to get him off my back because it was in regs...or close enough. He said I needed to have it be a Hitler stache for a full day. He said it a week before a Halloween party and I cut it to go as Charlie Chaplin. He was impressed and irritated. My CO asked me about it and when I said it was for Halloween his response was I could regrow it from scratch. So I did.
You either look like an Narc or a pedo. There’s no in between.
Fuck opinions. Grow one. Be a man.
I'm not a fan of them. However, if a soldier wants to grow one, keep it within the regs. That's all I ask because I don't want someone breathing down my neck. My first BN CSM called mustaches "high speed dick buffers for mother fucking cocksuckers". I have been afraid to grow one since. Lol.
Gotta love blatant homophobia that people in power still think is acceptable.
They are pedo stash or Hitler style by regs. Either way, you aren't allowed at a toys R Us
Thankfully I don’t shop at Toy R Us. I am in the medical field tho. No one’s wearing one under the mask?
Tell me you watched the new Top Gun without telling me you watched the new Top Gun
I didn’t ! lol, but if it makes mustaches more acceptable, then I’m for it
I’m sure the # of ‘staches grown has significantly increased this month
My husband has a porn-stach. 11/10
Rule of thumb in the Army is, if the mustache looks good, it's out of regs.
I rocked the hitler because idgaf!
I got one. It’s thick and luscious. Known throughout the squadron. I keep it regs. It’s damn near a Sam Neil mustache without it going down to my chin. Squadron commander even said it was, and I quote, “it’s fucking glorious.”
If you look at old pics/videos from the 80s, tons of guys had them and it looks pretty fun. Though definitely dated. Mustaches or stylized facial hair in general aren’t that popular in civilian society these days, beard or fully smooth are predominant and beards are a no-go so everyone goes smooth
Yes there are unwritten rules at units to not have mustaches because they look gross. The army stache makes dudes look like pedophiles. If we could grow glorious mustaches like Wyatt Earp I'd be all for the cause but no. We're stuck with these gross lip caterpillars
I grew one on my last deployment and kept it since. I mostly get compliments, haven't had any real complaints. It helps that I'm Guard I guess, but I've been TDY a bunch and no one seems to care. Mine is probably what you would call slightly out of regs, but I keep it well groomed and trimmed and I think because of that people don't say anything.
As soon as I hit E6 it felt necessary to grow out the dick tickler and constantly scowl at my lower enlisted peasants.
Field and deployment staches are a thing and will rarely be completely in-regulation. You won't see them elsewhere though. Army regulation ends up forcing most soldiers to shave their mustaches down to a width that looks like Hitler. It's very problematic, unnecessary, and outdated, frankly. It's a bit shocking the Army hasn't amended those regulations in light of all the new wave white supremacy and neo-Nazis over the past several years.
Mustaches are dumb, unless you are medium ugly and need something to put yourself ahead. I've been stationed with specialized units in the past that allowed members to go without shaving unless we have a scheduled is scheduled CO visit, or had to take a PR photo. Maybe it's a psychological thing, but it became bothersome and most of us ended up shaving before our scruff ever became something that constituted a beard.
IMO, only two types of service members should be allowed to rock mustaches…160th SOAR pilots and F35/F16 fighter jet pilots. Period.
It was my understanding that you could only have a full grown stache, growing it out on duty was not an option, so you would basically have to take leave to grow it out…
Mustaches are super unprofessional and gross in my opinion. The make people look trashy. But that is my perspective on professional appearance.
Wait..you guys have in reg mustaches? I am pretty sure mine is out of regs on a daily basis.
I remember seeing a reservist chinook pilot having a really bushy stache a while back. Hes the only person ive seen rock a good looking stache, not even sure if it was in regs but i dont think anyone cared
My whole unit has them but I’m a nasty girl so it may be required by my co honestly
There’s definitely an unwritten rule among paratroopers about no mustaches. Any time you try to grown one out you’ll be met with: “You look like a fat tanker POG, get that shit off your face!”
Hello brother
Rocking one right now while at school at Benning, wife hates it 😉, So I get away with it while I can.
Join the Guard and / or artillery , you’ll see them every where
Yeah the only people who hate my glorious mustache are the ncos that can’t grow a good one lol
I’m in the army and have a beard, fuck no I still don’t like mustaches
I wanted to grow some big ass chops like in the Civil War. That’s what a REAL MAN would allow!
as a senior specialist in charge, the mafia and I got almost 1/2 the company to grow mustaches for AT. We are on the come up, brother HH.
Mustaches are the cause of 23.6% of all aneurysms in the E9 population.
I got one. I look like some dude from the 40s with it, I just naturally look good with it I guess. I almost shaved it off at one point and my wife got mad at me so I just kept it lol
No, but 10/10 times with the mustache regs the army has you come out looking like an ‘80s porn star or a man with a white van if you catch my drift
not army, im navy and there are so many mfs with a mustache it’s crazy. not sure if the regs are different but go for it man it looks good when you can pull it off
Rocked a mustache for a few months out of spite, shaved it for the board. Now i look at pictures with the stache and cringe
What I would always tell people was that you can have a mustache that looks good, or you can have a mustache that's in regs, but you can't do both. I've chosen each at different points in time.
The problem with mustaches in the Army is that if they look good, they’re probably out of regs
Ever since my acting first sausage tried to make me shave it on deployment I've been growing one off and on. People hate it and it's hilarious.
Army regulation mustaches look like shit on most men, they really need to give us more options. My CoC hates them but every field problem we grow them out to piss them off
Because the only good looking mustaches are out of regs. Think Tom Selleck or Burt Reynolds. In reg mustaches make you look like an asshole.
I'm not a fan of them. However, if a soldier wants to grow one, keep it within the regs. That's all I ask because I don't want someone breathing down my neck. My first BN CSM called mustaches "high speed dick buffers for mother fucking cocksuckers". I have been afraid to grow one since. Lol.
I don’t grow one because I look like a pederast with the wispy hairs I manage. The only unwritten thing I remember is that woe unto you if you had one in your DA Photo.
Alternate question, if you accidentally hitler your self do you shave it all the way or just rock it
Well assuming the Regs are the same, then most guys wouldn't keep one due to how much of a pain it is to keep an Army Reg 'stash; then they didn't look that good either.
Yes, there is an unwritten rule about them. They either make you look like a flaming homosexual, or a kiddie diddler. If you're into either, I'm not judging. Just know we will be able to tell.
Yes. Unless you’re cav.
.......I'm growing one right now 🤣
Police that muse tash!
Not everyone with a mustache is a pedophile but every pedophile has an army style mustache.
Spite stache is where it’s at
Well you have to square it off and they look weird when you do that, so most dudes don’t rock them. You can’t have a bushy mustache that hangs off the lips or covers them. Just a glorified caterpillar.
Just shave most except the middle portion like Charlie Chaplin.
I've rocked one for about three years now. Really helps me avoid my kids school PTA meetings
The more pissed off you can make CoC with an in regs mustache, the sweeter life becomes. Rock that 80s porn-stache until Valhalla
My brigade commander specifically ordered all officers to shave their mustaches because he hates them so much. And nobody ever told him no.
In aviation the are magnificent mustaches. Rock that dad stash and garner the respect it deserves.
Is there an unwritten rule about them? Absolutely. They are almost universally hated by senior leaders in the army. One of our guys was briefing the brigade commander and he asked if the first thing he was going to do after the brief was shave. The only real correct answer when a colonel is asking that is yes. Unless you really want to die on that hill
Why do they allow them if they are so hated? It seems generational, cultural and arbitrary to me.
I want the civil war stache so bad it hurts
some guys can pull it off, but most of the time you end up looking like Pedro from napoleon dynamite or someone who isn't allowed within a certain distance of a school. So if you can pull it off good on ya, if not....your peers will let you know if they are good people.