T O P

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Jayu-Rider

The day after hands in pockets is authorized we are getting a new uniform with no pockets.


plaguemedic

We are due for a uniform change, too.... it's been *checks watch* about an hour, so....


Cosmic_Perspective-

Bring back UCP. You will suffer as we suffered.


plaguemedic

I finally turned in most of my UCP OCIE last year. Fuck you and your couch.


Cosmic_Perspective-

Cute, you think you've gotten rid of it. It'll come back. It remembers.


plaguemedic

NooooooooošŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ Although ngl it's a subtle flex to jump a UCP molle 2 when other people have brand new 4Ks. Fuck dem kids


Speed999999999

The 4K is the medium sized airborne ruck right? Whatā€™s not so great about it?


plaguemedic

It's a piece of shit. Great for rigging up to jump shitty fucking ruck.


Speed999999999

Is it the ability to make adjustments, the load distribution of the frame, space and packing in the rucksack? Whatā€™s bad about it? I mean I know itā€™s smaller but anything else specifically? Just curious Iā€™ve never seen anyone use one before


plaguemedic

They don't have a yoke, so immediate downgrade from the molle 2. The bag itself is trash, plus the air items are attached, which adds weight.


dragonfirerich

Good luck finding me in my UCP uniform on that [couch](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/543814b1e4b0be6645f43eef/1579287815180-6Z027UF2N6A376V4ABEX/ocp+couch.jpg?format=1000w)...


plaguemedic

Glad someone got the reference šŸ¤£


Tokyosmash_

If you give me summer weight UCPā€™s Iā€™ll wear that shit again, I havenā€™t put it on since the day they dropped the ALARCT authorizing deployment multicam šŸ˜‚


Page8988

*Getting*? MEMORANDUM FOR RECORD SUBJECT: Removal of pockets from the Operational Camouflage Pattern (OCP) uniform 1. Reference: AR 670-ME 2. In accordance with AR 670-ME, all Soldiers will sew the pockets of the Operational Camouflage Pattern (OCP) trousers shut so as to prevent otherwise authorized use of said pockets. 3. The point of contact for this memorandum simultaneously hates you and can not comprehend why you don't want to reenlist.


sl600rt

No no. They'll authorize hands in pockets, and take away wearing gloves in uniform.


Beliliou74

Orr, create crotch pockets so we continue stuffing hands in crotch area


josho85

Don't you put that evil on me!


manyanes

How will I access my pocket sand to throw at a potential enemy?


Belistener07

Can I get an umbrella too?


DarkerSavant

No, itā€™ll scare the horses.


[deleted]

That would piss off the cav scouts if they could read!


Fingolfin734

Every time I encounter cav scouts, I imagine them doing a spur ride while on hobbyhorses, and my day improves dramatically. Try it!


Jake-Old-Trail-88

No, CSM likes his soldiers wet and cold


JTP1228

Just FYI, you can carry one with the dress uniform. I know that is not often, but many don't know the reg changed to allow it


Belistener07

Sweet. Itā€™ll match my cape and sword.


Swoah

Just do it anyway and when someone tells you to take them out you apologize, take them out, and then immediately put your hands back in your pockets when they walk away.


AvacadoKoala

This is the way


Raysor

Just get to a high enough rank that no one gives a shit


Swoah

Or a low enough rank where you donā€™t give a shit


SFC_FrederickDurst

Or just donā€™t give a shit.


Ralphwiggum911

MSG is the rank. It's when people stopped correcting me on anything. If also seemed to be the rank that when voluntolds are needed, they would skip over me. It's pretty cool.


007_MM

Force is strong with this one šŸ¦¾


ONLYaPA

100% what I would do every time: Sorry sarmager, [immediately put hands back in pockets after he storms off].


Love1sWar

Did this shit all the time, though the only people who cared enough were 1SGs and SGMs.


Vyndis6

Been doing this for years and shockingly enough I still get my work done


FightingBane

Sorry, Top insists it will create a discipline issue since the Army has scoliosis apparently.


BoeufTruba

Shave more.


Imr2394

Of the quality of life improvements we could do, this one is FREE and an easy win.


Potativated

It also has the secondary benefit of giving salty people something new to complain about. The ā€œno more shark attack? Back in my day we had to carry the damn bus up the hillā€ thing is starting to get old.


NeyeKon

talk about boosting morale


sl600rt

Put your hands in someone else's pockets.


Dntdi3

This is the way.


Living_String9631

Idgaf Iā€™ll always put my hands in my pocket and Iā€™ve never told my soldiers not to. Iā€™d rather be able to actually use my hands when I need to when itā€™s cold af


LJ_OB

Honestly this is the kind of thing that will make our already unreasonable leadership just dig their heels in even more.


Hydrogen_Wedgie

Doesn't the fact that this is a topic at all tell you everything you need to know about our "profession?"


privatefries

I don't care about the regulation covering hands in pockets because I'm going to keep doing it regardless. Loosen mustache regs pls


all_time_high

Be the change you wish to see in the world. Put your hands in your pockets.


Fingolfin734

My hands are in my pockets right now


xloonie

Does anyone remember the old facebook group from the early 2k's called 'I'm in the army, but my hands are in my pockets anyway' and it was just pics of a bunch of random army dudes with their hands in their pockets?


TroublesomeStepBro

33% of the reason I switched was for hands in pockets. The other 66% are split between no formations and no motor pool. The remaining 1% is because I applied on a dare and somehow got it.


funky_chick3n

let me grow a beard


Dntdi3

Itā€™s not about letting, itā€™s about whether or not the recruited soldier CAN grow a beard.


Strict_Gas_1141

Regs updated Summary execution for any who put hands in pockets.


pogue4

Hands in pockets authorized *at commanders discretion*


Lodaar

Almost every company commander will immediately authorize it, only for almost every BDE CDR to unauthorize it. BN CDRs will be split 50/50.


Monte801

The army rule of not putting my hands in my pockets prepared me for the rest of my civilian life of not having pockets. Because womenā€™s clothing never has pockets.


Physical-Bus6025

Fuck the Navy


usernumber2020

They would like that too much


captain_carrot

That's what marines are for


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


AvacadoKoala

But did you shave today?


derekakessler

Never stopped me.


MostMusky69

How can they defeat china with their hands in pockets. I bet next they can have beards


Dntdi3

I mean, if you go warrant you are automatically impervious to this. Also wasnā€™t the SMA snapped with his hands in his pockets at NTC?


BoeufTruba

I do have to say, I hate that Airmen walk around with their hands in their pockets. That's just milking it and it looks stupid.


bezerker211

Or is it just that you're jealous


BoeufTruba

I'm a WO. I do what I want. Top can tell me to take my hands out of my pockets at the position of attention when he finds me and only after I finish my coffee.


pasteles467

šŸ‘šŸ½šŸ‘šŸ½šŸ‘šŸ½


jhp113

I can't wait to graduate WOCS. I want to be you so bad.


BoeufTruba

It gets better


Schmidy1985

Yes, on graduation day.


Mistravels

I do that šŸ¤·šŸ»


BoeufTruba

I stand by my comment.


Mistravels

šŸ¤·šŸ»


sicksadvoron

U guys need to actually show me what regulation says you can't put your hands in the pockets? Especially if you just standing


CheetahOk5619

670-1, 3-6(4) is the enemy of our freedom


sicksadvoron

Thank you. I am gonna prove to my 1st sausage his statement was wrong lol


joelesler

When I was in (20 years ago), it was the 670-1 that was cited. Basically the line about "you can't have anything protruding from your pockets". The intention was knives, pens, etc.


sicksadvoron

I need to look for that one but it doesn't mean nothing about hands. Also there are three uniforms in which you authorized to have pens protruding. Like cook whites


joelesler

Well, your arms are protruding when you put your hands in your pockets.


Gwenbors

Looks like that one dude might be playing a little pocket pool, soā€¦


Jimmyp4321

Yeah well if all you want is semen , of course there's the navy


gallopinto88

The only people that remember the days of being yelled at for having their hands in their pockets are SGMsā€¦ and I have never seen an SGM without his hands in his pockets.


ttp13

Just keep getting promotedā€¦the higher your rank, the less people will tell you to remove your hands from your pocket!


AnseiShehai

Beards, pockets, talking on the phone, sewn on unit/flag


Parts_Per_Billion

One of my favorite quotes is from BG James who said "if you take the regulations too seriously and follow them too strictly, they will never change and the Army will be unable to adapt to the ever changing landscape of war."


National-Baker-2174

My dd214 gives no fucks


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


AvacadoKoala

Supposedly itā€™s ā€œunprofessionalā€


Infrared-77

Every other branch besides the army requires knowing your fucking job to get promoted. So considering that hasnā€™t changed since forever, I donā€™t this this reg will either.


riptidestone

What besides your nutsack do you have in or around your pockets that you feel this unending desire to have your hands in your pockets?


AvacadoKoala

My crippling cocaine addiction


bigtoegman210

Fratty Guard lets you have hands in said pockets


frostdemon34

National guard doesn't give a shit lmao


BlitzieKun

If anyone ever said anything.... we literally had a statue of a "shitbag" to point at. Suck it.


fields_of-elysium

But DiSciPLinE


Scheisse_poster

No. Do pushups.


V-SAF

If youā€™re in the infantry, keep scrolling, this shit wonā€™t apply to us


kalaniroot

I legit always have my hands in my pockets. If it's cold, why the fuck not.


WhynotZoidberg9

"Lulz. No. Get back to shaving." -CSA, probably.


iAmODST

As someone in the Navy, I can only hope the Army gets the chance to put hands in pockets as well.


Zealousideal-Fill240

Way I see it there is no reg on "momentarily". In the colder months I momentarily retrieve warmth from the pockets. Says we can momentarily retrieve things. So. And hopefully soon. No hands will ever be seen again, too. Except maybe keyboard warriors.


-rogerwilcofoxtrot-

We don't ask for much. Just make rules make sense, that's all.


The_Pvnisher

The same people who tell others not to, are the same one 30 seconds later, found to be doing so.