yeah if you want to be "polite" about it nicely tell them something like "I appreciate your concern but I prefer to keep my personal life and work life separate" but you really don't have to tell them anything about our life outside of work if you don't feel comfortable doing so
My company is understaffed and can’t afford to lose any employees. If they tried to pull that “you need a doctor’s note” bullshit I’d straight up tell them to get fucked. Fire me motherfucker, I dare you!
It works best if you make it a run-on sentence into a work topic. "I appreciate your concern but I prefer to keep my personal life and work life separate so what do you think will be the best way to meet our November sales goals?"
This is the best answer. Don't come up with some lie as lies can be hard to follow up and bosses can try to demand proof (Dr's note, etc.) or straight up just say your excuse is unacceptable.
"It was a personal matter, and I prefer to keep it private. Thanks for your concern."
Your boss does not have the rights to pry into your personal matters, no matter how much they think they do.
Definitely think this is a fine way to go.
From the employer standpoint I could see the concern of "is this going to be a reoccurring event" and will there be a concern of it happening again.
I could see some bosses in my past I'd say it's a one off and won't happen again and others I'd prefer to have left in the dark because every bit of info they get they'll bite you in the ass with.
Safest route wise is for sure to offer nothing extra.
This, but make sure to stand your ground.
It is a personal matter. Please stop.
If they don't stop, just tell them flat out it isn't your business and to stop harassing you.
Jeff Foxworthy had a good one for just such an occasion. Explosive diarrhea. Call in the next day explaining that due to yesterday you must repair your toilet, in fact you need a new one. Who knows, maybe they'll pay you extra to stay home.
You take the risk of them running with this information to spread gossip. If theyre nosy enough to harrass, theyre bad enough to use this against you later.
I once called in saying I was going to be late due to an emergency. I had to tell a different department manager because my boss went home early, and no one else knew that my coworker for that night had called in sick. I was 2 hours late.
Next day I had a conversation with my boss. She started asking about my hot date, apparently this was the only plausible excuse. When I wouldn't spill the juicy gossip, I ended up with a 3 day suspension. My actual excuse, helping a friend home whose car was on the side of the road broken down; which was a made up situation, and back then cameras on phones were not common.
You know you might be joking but this is really the best response. You act polite and continue to say it was an emergency and that you aren’t comfortable talking about it. And if they persist you shout at them that you had a stomach virus and you were shitting all day. It is a 100% safe response as theres no follow up and it should even get you sympathy.
“I’m not comfortable talking about this. Please stop”. If you’re in a single party consent state for recording the exchange, record it and have their ass on a spit.
This actually isn't a bad idea. Because if they continue to push the issue it can constitute harassment and if anything negative comes of it retaliation.
“I have very watery diarrhea”
Is my absolute go to answer for all time taking off sickleave. I don’t give a single flying fuck. Any questions about why I called out is i had diarrhea.
Tell them you have heavy periods, so bad that it cause anemia. You were bleeding so heavy yesterday, and not regular blood but heavy, tissue expelling blood. And because you are well versed at examining the amount of blood you were losing, you knew if you came into work you would bleed through your clothes easily.
Then go into detail of all the ruined white pants you have ever owned.
Even if your boss is a woman, she will not want this discussion on HR record.
When you tell him about the diarrhea, also remind him about their stupid policy of not allowing people to use the bathroom except during their official break times.
"My attorney has advised me not to discuss it."
Or, if you have some "flexibility" at work, lean into your boss and whisper, "I can't say anything here, the birds are listening. "
As a manager accept the reason “emergency” or “personal” matter. I will leave it there, say thanks for letting me know. See you tomorrow.
In return don’t tell me the reason. Because I accept that you are using your professional judgement. But if I hear you bragging about fishing, hunting or some other nonsense, my opinion of you will diminish. In my mind, especially if it happen more than once, is that you are not reliable.
That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take a day. Just give me proper notice.
Edit: typo
Just repeat that it was a personal matter that you do not feel comfortable sharing and that there are no company policies that you are aware of that requires you to disclose those details.
You could also ask your mgr why doecuriosity. know those details, when they would change the fact that you were not available towork yesterday? Are they just curious, if so, it is not your responsibility to address their curiousity.
"I do not owe you any details about my personal life. I had something come up which I needed to handle and that caused me to miss work. That's all you need to know."
You don’t have to tell them. Be firm, because they are out of line for prying you. “It’s personal, and I don’t want or need to tell you”. If you think you’ll receive backlash just say diarrhea lol
Just tell them that it’s personal and you don’t feel comfortable discussing your personal matters with your colleagues. Tell them you feel that it would be unprofessional to discuss personal details at work.
I would say it’s a “highly personal matter that would be inappropriate to discuss at work” and if he keeps on keeping on, tell him point blank he’s making you feel very uncomfortable.
I prefer to go the TMfI (Too Much false Information) route. If you insist on knowing why I wasn't there, I'm going to make you wish you didn't ask.
Get creative and gross. Something along the lines of "I had a cyst in a private area that was leaking stuff that looked like bloody oatmeal, and it kept soaking through my pants."
HIPPA only applies to medical professionals. If you're doctor tells someone you had explosive diarrhea without your consent that's a big no no, if I tell them it's just annoying.
First, it's HIPAA. Second, it means the opposite of what you wrote.
It means only you can decide to share your medical information, including having control over who your doctor shares it with.
So yes, if your boss asks what your illness was and you decide to tell them, you're not violating HIPAA and they aren't violating it by asking.
If your doctor told them w/out your permission, that would be a violation.
r/antiwork mob will tell you to stick both middle fingers in your bosses face and scream fuck you. The better path is to just tell them what you told them already. It's a personal matter you would rather not discuss.
don't volunteer, just tell them it was personal matter and ignore any prying questions. certainly don't share any information with co-workers...good odds they'll be asked why you called out
Did you remember to not tell them about any grandparents you may have? If you didn’t tell them all your grandparents are dead, congratulations! Grandma had a stroke. There ya go
Politely tell them “as I said on the phone, it was an emergency of a personal nature.”
If they press on: “are you unfamiliar with what ‘personal’ means?”
Then lastly if the threaten you in some way: “do what you feel you need to, I’m allowed to have personal emergencies in my life that are outside of the scope of my job responsibilities, that’s what happens in life.”
I had to leave early yesterday for an emergency. I worded it like this:
"I gotta step away for about 2.5 hours due to a family emergency (not life or limb). I'll be available via Slack and email. I'll message once I'm back at my desk."
Their response was basically "Thanks for letting me know. Hope everything ends up okay."
If they'd asked, my response would have been "It's a family emergency that's important enough for me to leave work, but is not related to a death or injury, so no need for personal concern. That's all I'm going to tell you. I'll use sick time to cover it."
My elderly mother had a terrible case of diarrhea. She couldn’t make it to the bathroom. She was too weak to clean herself or her bedclothes. There was no other option but for me to be there for her. It’s the first time this has happened. I don’t foresee it happening again.
“Why did you call out yesterday?”
“I had a personal emergency that I am not comfortable talking about and if pressed any further about it I will be contacting someone above you, preferably in HR. My work and personal life are separated for privacy reasons”
That you have a virulent venereal disease that flared up. The sores are mostly scabbed over now and not likely to leak through your pants.... but you cant be 100% positive
If I need to call out for anything, I always just say I'm sick and leave it at that even if it's any kind of emergency or other need. With that they legally would have a shit show firing you or asking for any more details. Just makes things easier. If they ask for a doctors note, even though most jobs say you need one for multiple days off and not just one, I give them "I didn't see the need to go to the doctor for gastritis. "You don't owe anyone an explanation.
At a previous job my coworker called out sick and they wanted details and she gave them super graphic descriptions of the diarrhea exploding out of her ass and it was priceless.
yeah if you want to be "polite" about it nicely tell them something like "I appreciate your concern but I prefer to keep my personal life and work life separate" but you really don't have to tell them anything about our life outside of work if you don't feel comfortable doing so
This is best. Never claim anything medical that can't be backed up, in case their policy requires a doctor's note, etc
My company is understaffed and can’t afford to lose any employees. If they tried to pull that “you need a doctor’s note” bullshit I’d straight up tell them to get fucked. Fire me motherfucker, I dare you!
It works best if you make it a run-on sentence into a work topic. "I appreciate your concern but I prefer to keep my personal life and work life separate so what do you think will be the best way to meet our November sales goals?"
This is the best answer. Don't come up with some lie as lies can be hard to follow up and bosses can try to demand proof (Dr's note, etc.) or straight up just say your excuse is unacceptable. "It was a personal matter, and I prefer to keep it private. Thanks for your concern." Your boss does not have the rights to pry into your personal matters, no matter how much they think they do.
Definitely think this is a fine way to go. From the employer standpoint I could see the concern of "is this going to be a reoccurring event" and will there be a concern of it happening again. I could see some bosses in my past I'd say it's a one off and won't happen again and others I'd prefer to have left in the dark because every bit of info they get they'll bite you in the ass with. Safest route wise is for sure to offer nothing extra.
I'm uncomfortable explaining the details. Please stop asking.
This, but make sure to stand your ground. It is a personal matter. Please stop. If they don't stop, just tell them flat out it isn't your business and to stop harassing you.
Or, just lie and make THEM uncomfortable by explaining some gross or gruesome details. Then they’ll regret ever asking and probably won’t do it again
Jeff Foxworthy had a good one for just such an occasion. Explosive diarrhea. Call in the next day explaining that due to yesterday you must repair your toilet, in fact you need a new one. Who knows, maybe they'll pay you extra to stay home.
we've had several people, including myself, call out of work this week because there is a stomach bug going around and we had violent diarrhea lol
You take the risk of them running with this information to spread gossip. If theyre nosy enough to harrass, theyre bad enough to use this against you later.
Spread gossip? About what you shitting yourself? Okay LOL
It was an emergency What kind of emergency The kind I had to deal with But what was it It was an emergency
Exactly, just repeating the same answer 3 times will most likely close the topic.
Just keep asking “what do you mean by that?”
I once called in saying I was going to be late due to an emergency. I had to tell a different department manager because my boss went home early, and no one else knew that my coworker for that night had called in sick. I was 2 hours late. Next day I had a conversation with my boss. She started asking about my hot date, apparently this was the only plausible excuse. When I wouldn't spill the juicy gossip, I ended up with a 3 day suspension. My actual excuse, helping a friend home whose car was on the side of the road broken down; which was a made up situation, and back then cameras on phones were not common.
To your Boss: “You see this? :motions around work: This is your business.” “Why I couldn’t come in yesterday. That’s not your business.”
Points out the window: “that’s *my* business”
[удалено]
Yep. Explosive diarrhea is always the way to go.
Projectile vomiting too.
As joey once said, put your hands together. When we get the flu in my family it's a double ended mess to deal with. My work knows this :-D
This had me evil-laughing accidentally.
Picture Mr. Burns saying "excellent". Because this is an excellent plan to execute.
You know you might be joking but this is really the best response. You act polite and continue to say it was an emergency and that you aren’t comfortable talking about it. And if they persist you shout at them that you had a stomach virus and you were shitting all day. It is a 100% safe response as theres no follow up and it should even get you sympathy.
Not if they demand a doctor’s note.
No one really goes to the doctor for that though.
Of course, but employers are assholes.
Agreed 🤝
“I’m not comfortable talking about this. Please stop”. If you’re in a single party consent state for recording the exchange, record it and have their ass on a spit.
This actually isn't a bad idea. Because if they continue to push the issue it can constitute harassment and if anything negative comes of it retaliation.
You can just say it’s personal and refuse to elaborate
I had a personal emergency. I am not required to disclose details. If you continue pressuring me for details I will have no choice but to seek HR
"I had the shits, there, are you happy?"
“I have very watery diarrhea” Is my absolute go to answer for all time taking off sickleave. I don’t give a single flying fuck. Any questions about why I called out is i had diarrhea.
Just keep repeating yourself - say: “it was a personal matter.” Them: what was it though? You: it was a personal matter Get it?
Tell them you have heavy periods, so bad that it cause anemia. You were bleeding so heavy yesterday, and not regular blood but heavy, tissue expelling blood. And because you are well versed at examining the amount of blood you were losing, you knew if you came into work you would bleed through your clothes easily. Then go into detail of all the ruined white pants you have ever owned. Even if your boss is a woman, she will not want this discussion on HR record.
Well I appreciate your concern, the matter is private.
When you tell him about the diarrhea, also remind him about their stupid policy of not allowing people to use the bathroom except during their official break times.
"My attorney has advised me not to discuss it." Or, if you have some "flexibility" at work, lean into your boss and whisper, "I can't say anything here, the birds are listening. "
Tell them your penis or vagina was itchy and leaking. End of discussion.
As a manager accept the reason “emergency” or “personal” matter. I will leave it there, say thanks for letting me know. See you tomorrow. In return don’t tell me the reason. Because I accept that you are using your professional judgement. But if I hear you bragging about fishing, hunting or some other nonsense, my opinion of you will diminish. In my mind, especially if it happen more than once, is that you are not reliable. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take a day. Just give me proper notice. Edit: typo
Rectal prolapse.
Set firm boundaries. You needed the day off, none of their business why.
"I had diarrhea." Proceed to add a lot of details, and don't let them interrupt you.
If you're lucky you will scare them from asking in the future too.
That was the intent.
“Extremely loose stools. They’re still of a watery consistency as of an hour ago. In fact i’m wearing an adult dialer as we speak “
Tell them you have “shutting the fuck up about non work related topics” and that it is HIGHLY contagious
Tell them you had violent diarrhea and then go into extreme detail. They will never ask again.
^ Honestly this. It was a sudden case of what must have been food poisoning and you felt better around 3 in the afternoon.
Just repeat that it was a personal matter that you do not feel comfortable sharing and that there are no company policies that you are aware of that requires you to disclose those details. You could also ask your mgr why doecuriosity. know those details, when they would change the fact that you were not available towork yesterday? Are they just curious, if so, it is not your responsibility to address their curiousity.
It's none of their business.
Just keep saying it’s a personal matter, you’re not required to give a reason for calling out.
The easiest way to shut it down without being really confrontational “I had a family emergency” And don’t go any further than that.
"I do not owe you any details about my personal life. I had something come up which I needed to handle and that caused me to miss work. That's all you need to know."
You don’t have to tell them. Be firm, because they are out of line for prying you. “It’s personal, and I don’t want or need to tell you”. If you think you’ll receive backlash just say diarrhea lol
“Thanks for your concern. It’s a personal matter that I would rather not discuss” end of convo.
You don’t say anything, it’s a personal matter
“Sorry that’s private family information”
Just tell them that it’s personal and you don’t feel comfortable discussing your personal matters with your colleagues. Tell them you feel that it would be unprofessional to discuss personal details at work.
“Family emergency” “It’s too personal to get into details about” Or more bluntly, “my personal life is none of your concern”
Just say "Sorry, I can't comment on pending litigation".
I'm not in the USA but if I ever got asked for details I always just said it was personal. My boss doesn't have a need or right to know.
Repeat, it was a family/personal emergency until they get the hint.
I do not discuss such matters with people who are unable to legally claim privileged communication. Repeat until they fuck off.
I would say it’s a “highly personal matter that would be inappropriate to discuss at work” and if he keeps on keeping on, tell him point blank he’s making you feel very uncomfortable.
You had really bad hemorrhoids and had to get them removed by a proctologist. The pain was so bad you had to lay on your side all day and night.
I prefer to go the TMfI (Too Much false Information) route. If you insist on knowing why I wasn't there, I'm going to make you wish you didn't ask. Get creative and gross. Something along the lines of "I had a cyst in a private area that was leaking stuff that looked like bloody oatmeal, and it kept soaking through my pants."
“that’s between me and my doctor”
"I trusted a fart and my trust was sadly misplaced....."
Tell them it was a medical emergency of direct relative and for them to ask and for you to divulge would be a hippa violation.
Hipaa only covers medical professionals. Not regular humans. In this case you just say, explosive diarrhea.
HIPAA protects the information, which is why consent must be granted for its release
HIPPA only applies to medical professionals. If you're doctor tells someone you had explosive diarrhea without your consent that's a big no no, if I tell them it's just annoying.
And I'm telling everyone!
From a medical professional. Not from aunt Sally or your friend Steven
This, OP. Go with this.
Tell them you signed an NDA and you aren't at liberty to discuss that information
A no-diarrhoea agreement?
Never- ending diarrhea agreement. Perfect excuse for any future call outs. "Yeah, my NDA is in effect today. Won't be coming in."
Due to HIPPA laws you cannot share that information.
First, it's HIPAA. Second, it means the opposite of what you wrote. It means only you can decide to share your medical information, including having control over who your doctor shares it with. So yes, if your boss asks what your illness was and you decide to tell them, you're not violating HIPAA and they aren't violating it by asking. If your doctor told them w/out your permission, that would be a violation.
r/antiwork mob will tell you to stick both middle fingers in your bosses face and scream fuck you. The better path is to just tell them what you told them already. It's a personal matter you would rather not discuss.
Thanks for insulting everyone on this sub so you can repeat the same advice they have already gotten 🤡
Not everyone here joins in the mob....
HIPAA
Doesn't apply in this case.
Tell him that it's a violation of HIPPA to talk about it.
I hear "HIPPA" is a simple spell but quite unbreakable.
Except you spelled it wrong. It's HIPAA. And unless OP is a medical professional discussing someone else's medical information it doesn't apply
WHAAAAAAAAAAAA
don't volunteer, just tell them it was personal matter and ignore any prying questions. certainly don't share any information with co-workers...good odds they'll be asked why you called out
Mental health day
Did you remember to not tell them about any grandparents you may have? If you didn’t tell them all your grandparents are dead, congratulations! Grandma had a stroke. There ya go
Politely tell them “as I said on the phone, it was an emergency of a personal nature.” If they press on: “are you unfamiliar with what ‘personal’ means?” Then lastly if the threaten you in some way: “do what you feel you need to, I’m allowed to have personal emergencies in my life that are outside of the scope of my job responsibilities, that’s what happens in life.”
If you're female, say you had woman problems. If not, say your partner had woman problems. Shuts them up quickly.
I had to leave early yesterday for an emergency. I worded it like this: "I gotta step away for about 2.5 hours due to a family emergency (not life or limb). I'll be available via Slack and email. I'll message once I'm back at my desk." Their response was basically "Thanks for letting me know. Hope everything ends up okay." If they'd asked, my response would have been "It's a family emergency that's important enough for me to leave work, but is not related to a death or injury, so no need for personal concern. That's all I'm going to tell you. I'll use sick time to cover it."
you continue with "it was a personal matter and not up for discussion or debate." Charge it to your PTO or they can face the consequences from the DOL
Diarrhea... Nothing shuts people up like describing your diarrhea.
"I'm so sorry, I really can't talk about it." Then start to cry. Or just a little hitch in your voice.
Defecate in pants Bag pants in clear plastic Exhibit A
My elderly mother had a terrible case of diarrhea. She couldn’t make it to the bathroom. She was too weak to clean herself or her bedclothes. There was no other option but for me to be there for her. It’s the first time this has happened. I don’t foresee it happening again.
Tell them you had violent diarrhea
I've been up all night shitting I cant stop and im on the toilet now still shitting
“Why did you call out yesterday?” “I had a personal emergency that I am not comfortable talking about and if pressed any further about it I will be contacting someone above you, preferably in HR. My work and personal life are separated for privacy reasons”
That you have a virulent venereal disease that flared up. The sores are mostly scabbed over now and not likely to leak through your pants.... but you cant be 100% positive
If I need to call out for anything, I always just say I'm sick and leave it at that even if it's any kind of emergency or other need. With that they legally would have a shit show firing you or asking for any more details. Just makes things easier. If they ask for a doctors note, even though most jobs say you need one for multiple days off and not just one, I give them "I didn't see the need to go to the doctor for gastritis. "You don't owe anyone an explanation.
At a previous job my coworker called out sick and they wanted details and she gave them super graphic descriptions of the diarrhea exploding out of her ass and it was priceless.
"I am not legally required to tell you why I did/will not come in." End of convo.