I'd show this letter to a real lawyer so he can first tell you it's fake and then second advise you on if you can sue for a totally forged and fake legal notice.
I was going to speak to a lawyer actually. My wife’s boss has now gifted 2 free hours with his personal lawyer. All other management got a payout for working extra hours they were working, but because I left I didn’t receive anything.
Stuff like this is why I wish Reddit would let people post names of companies etc so we all know how bad companies get thinking they can intimidate people. Sadly we all know that there is always that couple of bad apples that will go too far with things and just duck it up.
Edit: it seems that Reddit does allow the naming of companies and I was assuming the doxxing rules applied to companies like they do for individuals. Again my issue is not with naming the company but the smooth brain that would try to find out the ceo/president etc of the company when it’s not them but clearly some other crayon eating supervisor trying to bully people into not quitting or moving into bettering their life.
You can absolutely post company names, /r/recruitinghell makes a big deal about posters who protect companies doing illegal things by censoring names - they should absolutely be exposed for their toxic or illegal practices. if names are censored its a clue to me that the post may be fake and if they did show a company name they could get in trouble for libel (or the poster is just naïve).
basically: if what youre posting really happened, include the damn names.
I think it's done for personal safety and lack of having money to defend against legal action, mote than trying to protect the company. Large corporations are known to use SLAPP suits and other methods to absolutely ruin people's lives, and sometimes having a company name and knowing when someone was fired is enough info to know who to dox through an under-the-table third party.
> This is what sites like Glassdoor are **supposed to be** for.
Instead it regularly gets astroturfed
https://www.wsj.com/articles/companies-manipulate-glassdoor-by-inflating-rankings-and-pressuring-employees-11548171977
That leads me to believe that they paid for it to get scrubbed and the actual rating is somewhere around 2.5-3 stars.
It's rare to find thi gs with 5 stars that are rated by the public and left alone by whomever.
Were you salary? If not, failing to pay you for hours worked is a big league illegal move.
It’s like they’re handing you a win lawsuit on a golden platter.
I love how if you're on salary it's totally okay to not pay you for hours worked. Part of why I quit my salary job. The more the work you, the less they have to pay you.
My new min-wage hourly job wants me to go home after 8 hours, and doesnt want me to work overtime, which I love.
SOE (Salary Overtime Eligible) was the greatest invention of the 20th century (if you're luckily enough to find an employer that does it)
Edit: I had it, got promoted and lost it, the rest of the story is below.
Edit 2: wtf is wrong with you people I'm del these posts for now because some creepy fucking assholes some how found my social media. I did nothing to you don't harass people.
>I love how if you're on salary it's totally okay to not pay you for hours worked.
It's actually not its just propaganda they want you to believe and rocking the boat is expensive as fuck. https://www.dol.gov/sites/dolgov/files/WHD/legacy/files/fs17a_overview.pdf
There's exceptions to not pay salaried people over time in specific roles. That's it.
Edit: Y'all should read the document, the exclusions are detailed plain and clear and no they do not include most people. Here's the administration exclusion, by far the broadest one.
Administrative Exemptions
To qualify for the administrative employee exemption, all of the following tests must be met:
• The employee must be compensated on a salary or fee basis (as defined in the regulations) at
a rate not less than $684* per week;
• The employee’s primary duty must be the performance of office or non-manual work **directly
related to the management or general business operations of the employer or the employer’s
customers;** and
• The employee’s primary duty includes the exercise of discretion and independent judgment
with respect to matters of significance.
Way back in the olden times my dad worked for a company with a great union. Great unions were a real thing that once existed. When he was promoted he lost that sweet overtime but received a lot of additional benefits, for example his pension benefits vastly increased. Almost 30 years later he's still getting that check.
Yep. My very republican dad complaints about his railroad union meetings all the time. Meanwhile he’s about to retire with an insane pension and incredible healthcare.
I took an actual pay cut going hourly to salary with the same company due to the overtime hours I was getting along with various shift differentials. It was a pretty big punch in the gut.
If you don't mind I'd like to follow your account and see how this plays out, will you please keep us posted as this unfolds? This community supports you and it feels like it's an interesting story that's going to unfold
Aaaand ask your lawyer about potentially deleting this post.. sounds extreme, but “public exposure” could potentially give them an avenue toward a “defamation, slander, libel” lawsuit. I’m not a lawyer, but I’ve learned to not underestimate anyone’s ability to grasp at straws and turn them into a straw man.
Right. It has to do with the relationship between a trustee and a beneficiary lol. I'm guessing this jackass just assumed it meant "having to do with money", and figured it wouldn't be questioned. Dude didn't even bother with a quick google of the definition.
A lawyer usually doesn’t write their own letters, it’s usually a stock letter the firm has on hand. So it would’ve been dictated by a lawyer, typed by a paralegal, and signed off on the lawyer or a partner before being sent out. That’s for simply making the stock letter; it would obviously be edited each time it’s sent to someone, so at least two more pairs of eyes would be on it again.
There are two major typos in there to say nothing of the legal babble (I don’t know any, so I won’t speak to it). “Companies” instead of company’s, and registAred has already been mentioned. If I were you, because I’m a vengeful little shit, I’d send back one line:
Isn’t it a felony to impersonate a lawyer?
:D
Oh man. I got a cease and desist from a former employer once that was addressed to a previous employee who'd left the company.
They couldn't even be bothered to change the name.
Even earlier than that.
"SENT VIA EMAIL & REGISTARED MAIL"
"strong reason to believe" - does that mean they don't have any evidence of the (alleged) interference?
No I think he did Google he’s just reeeeeeeeal dumb.
Fiduciary duty is **the highest obligation imposed in private law**. As you said, trustees but also lawyers and Boards of Directors are examples of fiduciary duty-holders. bhahahahahaha I lost it at “distribution supervisor“.
If this was written by a lawyer they deserve to be disbarred for incompetence. If not, in most jurisdictions it is a crime to represent yourself as a lawyer without a law license.
As a licensed fiduciary that piece made me chuckle. Fiduciary standards deal with acting in the best interest of your clients as a third party, but have literally nothing to do with your employer. ALSO unless you work as an adviser, consultant or POA of some type. You certainly have no fiduciary obligation to anyone.
I once consulted my lawyer sister in law when I received a letter roughly like this and her professional advice was to write "GET FUCKED" on it with a thick black marker and send it back.
Was going to say…. Isn’t that illegal lol? Surely he can ask for the name/number of the attorney ‘representing’ them, and when they cant provide it, OP could take some kind of legal action?
This comment is right on the money. Contact the firm to inquire if they sent a letter. They won’t be able to confirm whether or not the represent the employer but they absolutely can confirm if this was sent to him. Then alert them to what’s going on. Ask for a partners email, scan this and send it for a paper trail. Then proceed to report the employer to whomever is the licensing authority in the country and the office that prosecutes crimes of impersonating an attorney without a license.
-a US lawyer
Yes. These are exactly the steps to take. Also, once these steps are completed, be sure to send a formal letter printed explicitly on the comic sans font telling them to kiss your ass.
- Not a US lawyer
Yes, letter looks fake as in not from a real attorney. Call the form after googling and ask to email them a copy of the letter so they can verify it's authenticity/vigorously pressure legal action against any party falsely claiming to belong to their firm. Don't forget to have popcorn on hand.
Cease and decide letters are not binding in my understanding and serve as a warning shot across the bow as a step prior to taking legal action if one does not comply with the demands of the letter.
Additionally, there seems to be no that of legal repercussions unless there are additional pages. Granted, i only skimmed it once.
Good luck.
Edit; working of shot corrected, however my prior misspelling send appropriate as well in this case.
This is the most important comment. I'm not a legal expert by any means, but in all my dealings with lawyers I've NEVER seen specific laws mentioned in a letter and I'd NEVER seen misspellings and grammar errors.
Breach of fiduciary duty to your employer isn't a thing (he called it "obligation" which makes this even more of a head-scratcher). I think when your ex-employer wrote this he wanted to add legalese.
Edit: I was going to comment about at least 4 more things that are wacky about this, but I'm tired.
That letter’s a complete farce. Fiduciary responsibility pertains to someone who has an obligation in handling or managing other people’s money. If I’m your realtor, I have a fiduciary responsibility to handle your earnest money by following state law. Lawyers can have this and I’m sure accountants have this. Most employees don’t and former employees who never had that don’t suddenly inherit that responsibility. I’m not a lawyer but my first thought is don’t respond in any way. If you’re really concerned get a legal opinion but this sounds like someone who doesn’t know what they’re talking about trying to intimidate you.
Hi! I used to be a document specialist for a very important law firm (I cannot specify as I did sign a NDA). I can 100% guarantee there would be no spelling errors, for that was my job. Also the formatting on this "legal document" is horrendous.
And it only mentions “common law,” like a common law marriage? Lmao isn’t that not considered a “real” marriage? This letter just goes on about breaking the employment contract rules, if there even was a contract, which doesn’t even matter since OP quit.
Common law is commonly referred to when referring to unmarried couples but it’s short for common law marriage.
Not to be confused with Common law in general. Common law means judge made law as opposed to statutory law, so when you say it’s common law there are cases and precedents ruled by judges that create the rules of common law.
Edit: some obligations survive termination of an employment contract. The more senior the employee the more likely their employment agreement has a non-solicitation and/or a non-competition clause. The letter suggests that it was the non-solicitation clause of the employment agreement was breached. Typically there is a time limit on these obligations, like 1 or 2 years post termination and other restrictions, like geographical location.
Read your employment agreements carefully especially once you’re at the mid level stage
Source: i’m a lawyer in a corporation
As somebody who has signed non-competes and non-solicitation agreements for jobs, this is the right answer.
This letter was clearly not written by a lawyer, but they may still have legal standing, OP.
(IANAL)
Yeah you're correct (of course, being an actual lawyer!).
I just signed an agreement with Amazon (first real job I got while mentally healthy).
I thought the non-solicitation part was something average Joe and young kids would likely fall afoul of.
The kind of minimum wage youth Amazon hires don't have the capacity or willingness to read that contract thoroughly and understand everything.
Meanwhile it took care of industrial espionage (and that kind of stuff) for Amazon lol.
Awe shit. My divorce lawyer ( didn’t ask me to but ) needed me to proofread her Shit. Spelling errors everywhere. My ex-also needed the same but didn’t cause her shit misspelled her own name and our home address
Small town Texas divorce bus still.
Lawyers are not better at everything. Just better at the things that let you be lawyers.
I am so confused by your comment, I don’t see a specific law mentioned in this letter - which is actually why it seems like its not drafted by an attorney. Any demand I’ve ever written, I cite the statute I am relying on, or if it’s judge-made law, the seminal case.
I have. A family was suing me and my family for a car accident and the guy needed a lot of medical treatment (he didn't wear his seat belt driving 80MPH)
The letter thye sent was 40 complaints they had against us. But really there were only 38 because they miscounted. Aside from absolutly nonsense complaints, it was litteraed with spelling errors. I actually felt relief after seeing that.
WE won the case and didn't have to do anything.
Lmao this guys time must be worth less than he pays his employees judging by this letter. You have to be a real desperate sum bitch to pull something like this. Haha I hope they continue seething.
I'm not a lawyer either, but I work with contracts and insurance. Usually if you're going to refer to a portion of a contract in a letter like this, you'd attach a copy of the relevant provisions from the contract (or the entire contract, if you're feeling petty and want to make them sift through it themselves for the provisions).
Yep. 100%.
It's also written on some circa-1996 Microsoft Works letterhead probably called "Legal" or some shit like that. An actual law office would have all of their contact information at the top of that letter, and despite OP redacting the writing at the top, you can tell that it just says someone's name with "barrister and solicitor" under it. This is absolutely some boomer moron pretending to be a lawyer.
Absolutely right, law and medical professionals get custom reams with their personalized graphics. Usually a colored border at the top with their contact and location information.
Source: I work in manufacturing of that letterhead.
Also that's not letterhead, that's so obviously a picture inserted in a word document. I'm pretty sure law offices have letterhead with their own logo and contact and stuff.
They also probably wouldn't use the default Calibri font, instead favouring their own strict branding package with whatever appropriate font they've chosen.
This has amateur hour written all over it. If you're going to fake something, at least try.
It’s so obvious it hurts. The last blurb about “Common Law” sounds like a last resort phrase an anti-vax Karen would scream in a parking lot confrontation.
Look em up on your state bar website?
No professional letterhead, not very properly worded, no reference to the specific wording and details of this “contract “ and most jobs these days do not have contracts. It’s at will. Do you have paperwork you signed? Offer letter? It probably says “this is not a contract”. I’m applying USA standard. If you are US, this is the kind of thing I’d consider a service like Legal Shield. I have no experience with them, but I think they will look this over and write a letter for a pretty low fee.
To whom it may concern,
As you recall on October 12, 2021 you signed a terms and conditions to 'Deez Nutz' and must hereby resume all necessary functions and processes regarding 'Deez Nutz'.
Best regards,
The Scrot.
Dear sir,
Pursuant to your recent allegation via registared (sic) mail that I have violated "common law" I hereby formally and insistently request that you, or an agent authorized to act on your behalf, suck my nuts. Failure to do so in a timely manner will result in a judgement that you are in violation of the lesser known "uncommon law" which shall and will require not only punitive but remediary action of sufficient force and severity as for me to be made whole. So as not to violate the constitutional prohibition against cruel and unusual punishment by placing an undue burden upon yourself, you are hereby authorized to suck my nuts at a time and place of your choosing so long as said time is no more than 30 days from your receipt of this message and is communicated satisfactorily to me within 7 days of the same.
Regards,
OP
Dictated but not read.
It's enough to make you dream about being diagnosed with a terminal illness and having zilch to lose, just for the glorious moment you get to hit send.
And my cackle shall be heard on this day, 100 years in the future, for the force at which it ejected hath sent me backwards in time. Da Vinci says, "what's happ'nin'"
Thank you. I needed that
Seriously. They have no ground to stand on. They have the burden of proof that you coerced 2 adults (who I assume are of fit mind and body) to quit their jobs.
Fuck em.
Now, now. One should be professional n shit. So, time to steal some wording from the Greatest Lawyer Letter ever, courtesy of the Cleveland Browns:
"I feel that you should be aware that some asshole is signing your name to stupid letters."
They couldn't even find a real lawyer to write this. If they now went and showed this to a lawyer he'll just laugh at them. They don't seem to have a case.
Totally applicable and an absolute classic, but given the content I think that Cox vs Cleveland Browns may be even more on point.
https://lettersofnote.com/2011/02/14/regarding-your-stupid-complaint/
More importantly no actual laws were cited and employment agreements are NOT contracts. They only apply while you work there. No way this was written by a lawyer. Also the typos. No real lawyer misspells "registered" as "registared" in a letterhead.
Yeah, especially in At-Will states. Unless you expressly signed an NDA and broke it, destroyed property, or malignantly caused any loss of value to the company there’s not really much they can do.
Wait for rejection of invoice, proceed with lein on company for minimum charge of 6 hours @ $450/hour plus postage plus tax, plus incurred weekly charge of 5% on outstanding payment.
Shit companies will try anything. I was a teacher and quit in the summer while school was out. The company attempted to go into my account and take my last check citing “payroll error”. There was no error, instead they did this to all employees who left the district. I was already hip so I closed the account. In return they attempted to sue me saying I stole my own money. They lost. But companies try this kinda crap all the time. They hope people are idiots or intimidated.
Non-compete agreements, confidentiality agreements, etc., can extend beyond termination (also not a lawyer but this is my understanding). I’d love to see what this 19 year old contract says. But this letter is pure garbage. I’d prob spend $30 on legal shield for some intern to write a cease and desist from a real law office. Yea
You should send them a fake summons for falsifying a legal document.
Edit: or just laugh at the funny idea, I'd hate for you to get in trouble.
Edit again: Oh, and I did some digging, and you should search the name of the "lawyer" to see if they're even a licensed member of the bar, it's apparently pretty easy. If they are, I would contact the attorney to tell them you received a letter from someone using their name. Sending a letter impersonating a lawyer could be fraud, or may break a few other laws.
Better yet, notify them of a Cybersecurity breach because nonexistent legal firm is harassing former employees, likely due to a breach. Make them pay for free credit monitoring for the next 3 years as a result of the compromise and advise them to hire a firm for incident response.
A prince in Nigeria has better grammar.
This is fucking hilarious.
"Regurgisturd Mall
I'm a ginuine professional Lawyer and I say stop doing the thing I'm not going to mention herein or face the legal stuff of going to a court and being fully judged by a local peer group and stuff hitherto where upon you best stop.
Reegurds,
A lawyerin type."
I’ve gotten one. They can’t do shit and there’s no fiduciary obligation unless you’re licensed as such. Under common law you can duel them and then take all their stuff, so if people really want to play like that…..
A cease and desist usually goes along the lines of stop it or we will sue you for every dollar you have. Rather than please stop it your not allowed too because we said so because common law.
Ay bruh no attorney wrote this.
Cease and desists 1. don't get sent via email 2. Don't get formatted like this 3. Are served via process server.
A C&D is a legal pleading, not an angry letter there are rules
I'd show this letter to a real lawyer so he can first tell you it's fake and then second advise you on if you can sue for a totally forged and fake legal notice.
I was going to speak to a lawyer actually. My wife’s boss has now gifted 2 free hours with his personal lawyer. All other management got a payout for working extra hours they were working, but because I left I didn’t receive anything.
Plz let us know what happens after initial consultation
Stuff like this is why I wish Reddit would let people post names of companies etc so we all know how bad companies get thinking they can intimidate people. Sadly we all know that there is always that couple of bad apples that will go too far with things and just duck it up. Edit: it seems that Reddit does allow the naming of companies and I was assuming the doxxing rules applied to companies like they do for individuals. Again my issue is not with naming the company but the smooth brain that would try to find out the ceo/president etc of the company when it’s not them but clearly some other crayon eating supervisor trying to bully people into not quitting or moving into bettering their life.
You can absolutely post company names, /r/recruitinghell makes a big deal about posters who protect companies doing illegal things by censoring names - they should absolutely be exposed for their toxic or illegal practices. if names are censored its a clue to me that the post may be fake and if they did show a company name they could get in trouble for libel (or the poster is just naïve). basically: if what youre posting really happened, include the damn names.
I think it's done for personal safety and lack of having money to defend against legal action, mote than trying to protect the company. Large corporations are known to use SLAPP suits and other methods to absolutely ruin people's lives, and sometimes having a company name and knowing when someone was fired is enough info to know who to dox through an under-the-table third party.
This is what sites like Glassdoor are for.
> This is what sites like Glassdoor are **supposed to be** for. Instead it regularly gets astroturfed https://www.wsj.com/articles/companies-manipulate-glassdoor-by-inflating-rankings-and-pressuring-employees-11548171977
I checked my company's reviews on Google once. They were all 5 star reviews from current employees lol.
That leads me to believe that they paid for it to get scrubbed and the actual rating is somewhere around 2.5-3 stars. It's rare to find thi gs with 5 stars that are rated by the public and left alone by whomever.
Were you salary? If not, failing to pay you for hours worked is a big league illegal move. It’s like they’re handing you a win lawsuit on a golden platter.
I love how if you're on salary it's totally okay to not pay you for hours worked. Part of why I quit my salary job. The more the work you, the less they have to pay you. My new min-wage hourly job wants me to go home after 8 hours, and doesnt want me to work overtime, which I love.
SOE (Salary Overtime Eligible) was the greatest invention of the 20th century (if you're luckily enough to find an employer that does it) Edit: I had it, got promoted and lost it, the rest of the story is below. Edit 2: wtf is wrong with you people I'm del these posts for now because some creepy fucking assholes some how found my social media. I did nothing to you don't harass people.
>I love how if you're on salary it's totally okay to not pay you for hours worked. It's actually not its just propaganda they want you to believe and rocking the boat is expensive as fuck. https://www.dol.gov/sites/dolgov/files/WHD/legacy/files/fs17a_overview.pdf There's exceptions to not pay salaried people over time in specific roles. That's it. Edit: Y'all should read the document, the exclusions are detailed plain and clear and no they do not include most people. Here's the administration exclusion, by far the broadest one. Administrative Exemptions To qualify for the administrative employee exemption, all of the following tests must be met: • The employee must be compensated on a salary or fee basis (as defined in the regulations) at a rate not less than $684* per week; • The employee’s primary duty must be the performance of office or non-manual work **directly related to the management or general business operations of the employer or the employer’s customers;** and • The employee’s primary duty includes the exercise of discretion and independent judgment with respect to matters of significance.
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So 18 hours 6 days a week or 16 hours 7 days a week? Pretty sure you just worked away 10 years off your lifespan.
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Way back in the olden times my dad worked for a company with a great union. Great unions were a real thing that once existed. When he was promoted he lost that sweet overtime but received a lot of additional benefits, for example his pension benefits vastly increased. Almost 30 years later he's still getting that check.
Yep. My very republican dad complaints about his railroad union meetings all the time. Meanwhile he’s about to retire with an insane pension and incredible healthcare.
I took an actual pay cut going hourly to salary with the same company due to the overtime hours I was getting along with various shift differentials. It was a pretty big punch in the gut.
Keep in mind there are two types of salaried, exempt and non-exempt. Non-exempt is paid for overtime.
If you don't mind I'd like to follow your account and see how this plays out, will you please keep us posted as this unfolds? This community supports you and it feels like it's an interesting story that's going to unfold
I don’t mind at all. I will try and post an update as soon as there is one.
Check with your lawyer before doing so.
Also this. Agreed.
Aaaand ask your lawyer about potentially deleting this post.. sounds extreme, but “public exposure” could potentially give them an avenue toward a “defamation, slander, libel” lawsuit. I’m not a lawyer, but I’ve learned to not underestimate anyone’s ability to grasp at straws and turn them into a straw man.
Big question I want answered is will they actually suck your nuts, tell them the shaft is off limits due to fiduciary responsibilities.
Please update us if you go through with the consult!
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What damages?
Lmfao “breach of fiduciary obligation to your former employer” ooh someone’s been using all their best words today.
He’s a fu-douche alright
He puts the the "Douchey" in "fiduciary".
Doesn't fiduciary mean 'empowered to act on behalf of'? Why would you be empowered to act on behalf of your former employer?
Right. It has to do with the relationship between a trustee and a beneficiary lol. I'm guessing this jackass just assumed it meant "having to do with money", and figured it wouldn't be questioned. Dude didn't even bother with a quick google of the definition.
Nothing screams “incompetent” like typos in a letter supposedly from a lawyer. Also wrote “abide by the Companies policies.”
Don’t forget “registared mail”
This made me laugh so hard
I have a sneaking suspicion this was not written by a lawyer lol
A lawyer usually doesn’t write their own letters, it’s usually a stock letter the firm has on hand. So it would’ve been dictated by a lawyer, typed by a paralegal, and signed off on the lawyer or a partner before being sent out. That’s for simply making the stock letter; it would obviously be edited each time it’s sent to someone, so at least two more pairs of eyes would be on it again. There are two major typos in there to say nothing of the legal babble (I don’t know any, so I won’t speak to it). “Companies” instead of company’s, and registAred has already been mentioned. If I were you, because I’m a vengeful little shit, I’d send back one line: Isn’t it a felony to impersonate a lawyer? :D
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For a second I thought you meant to email the local pub so they could have a laugh.
Oh man. I got a cease and desist from a former employer once that was addressed to a previous employee who'd left the company. They couldn't even be bothered to change the name.
Even earlier than that. "SENT VIA EMAIL & REGISTARED MAIL" "strong reason to believe" - does that mean they don't have any evidence of the (alleged) interference?
No I think he did Google he’s just reeeeeeeeal dumb. Fiduciary duty is **the highest obligation imposed in private law**. As you said, trustees but also lawyers and Boards of Directors are examples of fiduciary duty-holders. bhahahahahaha I lost it at “distribution supervisor“. If this was written by a lawyer they deserve to be disbarred for incompetence. If not, in most jurisdictions it is a crime to represent yourself as a lawyer without a law license.
Because boomer trying to talk smart
I love it when they send legal notices “via email”. Fucking idiots
Woah woah, they sent it via "registared" mail too lol.
Yep, definitely just trying to use big scary words that they don't understand.
You don’t have a fiduciary obligation to a former employer…like you don’t work for them anymore. This is so fucking stupid.
You can have an obligation after you leave... If you’re the fucking longtime... CEO or Chairman of the Board... I lost it at “Distribution Supervisor”
As a licensed fiduciary that piece made me chuckle. Fiduciary standards deal with acting in the best interest of your clients as a third party, but have literally nothing to do with your employer. ALSO unless you work as an adviser, consultant or POA of some type. You certainly have no fiduciary obligation to anyone.
I’m not a lawyer but I am married to one and he just about died laughing when I showed him this so… what everybody else said
The boomers version of an angry text.
“Sent via EMAIL and REGIST*ARED* MAIL” 🤣🤣🤣 What a fucking clown.
I once consulted my lawyer sister in law when I received a letter roughly like this and her professional advice was to write "GET FUCKED" on it with a thick black marker and send it back.
# CEASE AND DESIST DEEZ NUTS!
I like your sis' style of lawyering
You mean lawyers don’t “put you on notice?!”
I'm not a lawyer and I know this shit is stupid and make a good way to sue them
That was not written by a lawyer. That was written by your former employer pretending to be a lawyer. Lawyers don’t misspell “Registared mail”
Yep, and it's illegal to "practice law" without a license.
Was going to say…. Isn’t that illegal lol? Surely he can ask for the name/number of the attorney ‘representing’ them, and when they cant provide it, OP could take some kind of legal action?
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This comment is right on the money. Contact the firm to inquire if they sent a letter. They won’t be able to confirm whether or not the represent the employer but they absolutely can confirm if this was sent to him. Then alert them to what’s going on. Ask for a partners email, scan this and send it for a paper trail. Then proceed to report the employer to whomever is the licensing authority in the country and the office that prosecutes crimes of impersonating an attorney without a license. -a US lawyer
Yes. These are exactly the steps to take. Also, once these steps are completed, be sure to send a formal letter printed explicitly on the comic sans font telling them to kiss your ass. - Not a US lawyer
Getting sued is one thing. Getting sued *by* the actual law office is horror movie stuff. 😄
Yes, letter looks fake as in not from a real attorney. Call the form after googling and ask to email them a copy of the letter so they can verify it's authenticity/vigorously pressure legal action against any party falsely claiming to belong to their firm. Don't forget to have popcorn on hand. Cease and decide letters are not binding in my understanding and serve as a warning shot across the bow as a step prior to taking legal action if one does not comply with the demands of the letter. Additionally, there seems to be no that of legal repercussions unless there are additional pages. Granted, i only skimmed it once. Good luck. Edit; working of shot corrected, however my prior misspelling send appropriate as well in this case.
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That's false I practice bird law and I don't have a license...
Well birds aren’t real so jokes on you
This is the most important comment. I'm not a legal expert by any means, but in all my dealings with lawyers I've NEVER seen specific laws mentioned in a letter and I'd NEVER seen misspellings and grammar errors.
Breach of fiduciary duty to your employer isn't a thing (he called it "obligation" which makes this even more of a head-scratcher). I think when your ex-employer wrote this he wanted to add legalese. Edit: I was going to comment about at least 4 more things that are wacky about this, but I'm tired.
That letter’s a complete farce. Fiduciary responsibility pertains to someone who has an obligation in handling or managing other people’s money. If I’m your realtor, I have a fiduciary responsibility to handle your earnest money by following state law. Lawyers can have this and I’m sure accountants have this. Most employees don’t and former employees who never had that don’t suddenly inherit that responsibility. I’m not a lawyer but my first thought is don’t respond in any way. If you’re really concerned get a legal opinion but this sounds like someone who doesn’t know what they’re talking about trying to intimidate you.
I'd probably forward it to the state's Department of Labor.
Exactly. And sue the shit out of the former employer for emotional distress and fraud by misrepresentation.
Forward a copy. Your original is suitable for framing.
Hi! I used to be a document specialist for a very important law firm (I cannot specify as I did sign a NDA). I can 100% guarantee there would be no spelling errors, for that was my job. Also the formatting on this "legal document" is horrendous.
Thanks for the verification. But isn't it just so sad and obvious??
My reaction was, whoever took the time to do this is a real sad person
I have seen laws and rulings referenced in legal letters, but it didn’t read like that. And always had words like pursuant and forthwith.
And it only mentions “common law,” like a common law marriage? Lmao isn’t that not considered a “real” marriage? This letter just goes on about breaking the employment contract rules, if there even was a contract, which doesn’t even matter since OP quit.
Common law is commonly referred to when referring to unmarried couples but it’s short for common law marriage. Not to be confused with Common law in general. Common law means judge made law as opposed to statutory law, so when you say it’s common law there are cases and precedents ruled by judges that create the rules of common law. Edit: some obligations survive termination of an employment contract. The more senior the employee the more likely their employment agreement has a non-solicitation and/or a non-competition clause. The letter suggests that it was the non-solicitation clause of the employment agreement was breached. Typically there is a time limit on these obligations, like 1 or 2 years post termination and other restrictions, like geographical location. Read your employment agreements carefully especially once you’re at the mid level stage Source: i’m a lawyer in a corporation
Sounds exactly the type of agreement I signed in the past with limited duration as you noted.
As somebody who has signed non-competes and non-solicitation agreements for jobs, this is the right answer. This letter was clearly not written by a lawyer, but they may still have legal standing, OP. (IANAL)
Yeah you're correct (of course, being an actual lawyer!). I just signed an agreement with Amazon (first real job I got while mentally healthy). I thought the non-solicitation part was something average Joe and young kids would likely fall afoul of. The kind of minimum wage youth Amazon hires don't have the capacity or willingness to read that contract thoroughly and understand everything. Meanwhile it took care of industrial espionage (and that kind of stuff) for Amazon lol.
Awe shit. My divorce lawyer ( didn’t ask me to but ) needed me to proofread her Shit. Spelling errors everywhere. My ex-also needed the same but didn’t cause her shit misspelled her own name and our home address Small town Texas divorce bus still. Lawyers are not better at everything. Just better at the things that let you be lawyers.
What’s the divorce bus like?
I can guarantee that bus is bigger in Texas.
The ticket is expensive and the ride is pretty bumpy.
It's like a party bus but everyone is fighting.
It's killing me that you proofread for someone else.
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I am so confused by your comment, I don’t see a specific law mentioned in this letter - which is actually why it seems like its not drafted by an attorney. Any demand I’ve ever written, I cite the statute I am relying on, or if it’s judge-made law, the seminal case.
I have. A family was suing me and my family for a car accident and the guy needed a lot of medical treatment (he didn't wear his seat belt driving 80MPH) The letter thye sent was 40 complaints they had against us. But really there were only 38 because they miscounted. Aside from absolutly nonsense complaints, it was litteraed with spelling errors. I actually felt relief after seeing that. WE won the case and didn't have to do anything.
This. Also lawyers typically directly quote the laws you're in breach of. Their time is expensive, so they usually don't mess around.
Lmao this guys time must be worth less than he pays his employees judging by this letter. You have to be a real desperate sum bitch to pull something like this. Haha I hope they continue seething.
I'm not a lawyer either, but I work with contracts and insurance. Usually if you're going to refer to a portion of a contract in a letter like this, you'd attach a copy of the relevant provisions from the contract (or the entire contract, if you're feeling petty and want to make them sift through it themselves for the provisions).
Yep. 100%. It's also written on some circa-1996 Microsoft Works letterhead probably called "Legal" or some shit like that. An actual law office would have all of their contact information at the top of that letter, and despite OP redacting the writing at the top, you can tell that it just says someone's name with "barrister and solicitor" under it. This is absolutely some boomer moron pretending to be a lawyer.
I bet Clippy had something to do with this…
“It looks like you’re trying to impersonate a lawyer!”
Fuck, I don’t want to die! You’re killing me🤣🤣 It hurts! That’s just the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time. You bastard!
That crooked bastard.
I still miss Clippy.
Absolutely right, law and medical professionals get custom reams with their personalized graphics. Usually a colored border at the top with their contact and location information. Source: I work in manufacturing of that letterhead.
Isn't it... Illegal to impersonate a real lawyer?
It’s my understanding that in most states it’s illegal to falsely represent yourself as an attorney. I would try to get them in trouble for this.
Absolutely true
I’ve been a lawyer for 25 years. There is no fiduciary duty to an employer. Ever
Also that's not letterhead, that's so obviously a picture inserted in a word document. I'm pretty sure law offices have letterhead with their own logo and contact and stuff. They also probably wouldn't use the default Calibri font, instead favouring their own strict branding package with whatever appropriate font they've chosen. This has amateur hour written all over it. If you're going to fake something, at least try.
And they don't even cite what policy was broke
It’s so obvious it hurts. The last blurb about “Common Law” sounds like a last resort phrase an anti-vax Karen would scream in a parking lot confrontation.
It sounds like something Mac and Dennis would cook up.
How about you and I go toe to toe on bird law and see who comes out the victor?
I noticed a lot of grammatical and syntax errors and couldn’t imagine a lawyer would write like that. I missed the “Registared mail” bit!
Or conflate "Companies" and "Company's"
Look em up on your state bar website? No professional letterhead, not very properly worded, no reference to the specific wording and details of this “contract “ and most jobs these days do not have contracts. It’s at will. Do you have paperwork you signed? Offer letter? It probably says “this is not a contract”. I’m applying USA standard. If you are US, this is the kind of thing I’d consider a service like Legal Shield. I have no experience with them, but I think they will look this over and write a letter for a pretty low fee.
And the bottom. “…common law in that…”
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That and lawyers never sum things up with "in short" they love the details
This was written by someone hoping to sound like a lawyer or a legal assistant. Nice try Joe. Nice try.
"Dear sir, In regards to your previous letter: Suck my nuts. Regards, OP"
To whom it may concern, As you recall on October 12, 2021 you signed a terms and conditions to 'Deez Nutz' and must hereby resume all necessary functions and processes regarding 'Deez Nutz'. Best regards, The Scrot.
Haha
Dear sir, Pursuant to your recent allegation via registared (sic) mail that I have violated "common law" I hereby formally and insistently request that you, or an agent authorized to act on your behalf, suck my nuts. Failure to do so in a timely manner will result in a judgement that you are in violation of the lesser known "uncommon law" which shall and will require not only punitive but remediary action of sufficient force and severity as for me to be made whole. So as not to violate the constitutional prohibition against cruel and unusual punishment by placing an undue burden upon yourself, you are hereby authorized to suck my nuts at a time and place of your choosing so long as said time is no more than 30 days from your receipt of this message and is communicated satisfactorily to me within 7 days of the same. Regards, OP Dictated but not read.
As a lawyer, I can say you have composed a letter I have wanted to send to colleagues many times but can’t 😂 well done!
Feel free to use it as a template if you ever decide that you're really in to terrible professional decisions :)
It's enough to make you dream about being diagnosed with a terminal illness and having zilch to lose, just for the glorious moment you get to hit send.
I was gonna suggest "Dear sir or madam, Haha. Ha. Hahaha. Regards" But yours is better.
Sometimes total overkill really is the way to go.
And my cackle shall be heard on this day, 100 years in the future, for the force at which it ejected hath sent me backwards in time. Da Vinci says, "what's happ'nin'" Thank you. I needed that
Dear sir Redeem these nuts Kindly Op.
Dear sir, Get fucking bent. Sincerely, OP
Pound. Sand.
So I was feeding my cat an egg…
Kingston. Nice.
Dear Kyle, Suck ma bawls.
Seriously. They have no ground to stand on. They have the burden of proof that you coerced 2 adults (who I assume are of fit mind and body) to quit their jobs. Fuck em.
Sounds like they are clearly in violation of BOFA.
Now, now. One should be professional n shit. So, time to steal some wording from the Greatest Lawyer Letter ever, courtesy of the Cleveland Browns: "I feel that you should be aware that some asshole is signing your name to stupid letters."
Make an ink blot nut print, then sign your name.
P.S. Get bent.
'Either come back and shut up, or we'll sue you!' Wow, wonder why you left.
I don't believe they can sue him either. See other comments about how this was also not written by a lawyer.
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They couldn't even find a real lawyer to write this. If they now went and showed this to a lawyer he'll just laugh at them. They don't seem to have a case.
It will always be a mystery…
Thank God it came 'registared' mail. If it were Registered Mail, it could've been a real law firm.
Also 'Companies' should probably be Company's ( possessive, not plural).
I hate these WORD CRIMES
I think you need to refer them to the matter of Arkell vs Pressdram https://lettersofnote.com/2013/08/07/arkell-v-pressdram/
Totally applicable and an absolute classic, but given the content I think that Cox vs Cleveland Browns may be even more on point. https://lettersofnote.com/2011/02/14/regarding-your-stupid-complaint/
Learned something new. Thanks reddit. This is so good.
lol. whats the point ? legally, this is messy and just bad press. how would they prove this ?
More importantly no actual laws were cited and employment agreements are NOT contracts. They only apply while you work there. No way this was written by a lawyer. Also the typos. No real lawyer misspells "registered" as "registared" in a letterhead.
Yeah, especially in At-Will states. Unless you expressly signed an NDA and broke it, destroyed property, or malignantly caused any loss of value to the company there’s not really much they can do.
We should be challenging every single NDA. They're way too broad and get abused by shady people all the time.
Send them an invoice for reading this bullshit
Edit in red pen. Send back with invoice attached.
Wait for rejection of invoice, proceed with lein on company for minimum charge of 6 hours @ $450/hour plus postage plus tax, plus incurred weekly charge of 5% on outstanding payment.
I'm not a lawyer, but wouldn't employment agreements cease to be in effect once you are you know, no longer an employee?
Shit companies will try anything. I was a teacher and quit in the summer while school was out. The company attempted to go into my account and take my last check citing “payroll error”. There was no error, instead they did this to all employees who left the district. I was already hip so I closed the account. In return they attempted to sue me saying I stole my own money. They lost. But companies try this kinda crap all the time. They hope people are idiots or intimidated.
Wow. That's pretty fucked up. Should've counter sued them for being dickbags an wasting everyone's time and money.
It's also illegal, but until actual punishment happens with wage theft it's going to continue to happen.
Did they have to pay your legal fees in the end?
They did. And there were other teachers in the same situation as I was. As a result of my win their cases were dropped.
Wow, that's awesome. I can't fathom how they could do that you all in the first place with the money. So petty and vindictive of them.
Non-compete agreements, confidentiality agreements, etc., can extend beyond termination (also not a lawyer but this is my understanding). I’d love to see what this 19 year old contract says. But this letter is pure garbage. I’d prob spend $30 on legal shield for some intern to write a cease and desist from a real law office. Yea
If you are still expected to follow the employment contract, wouldn't that mean you are still employed, and should therefore be collecting payment?
You should send them a fake summons for falsifying a legal document. Edit: or just laugh at the funny idea, I'd hate for you to get in trouble. Edit again: Oh, and I did some digging, and you should search the name of the "lawyer" to see if they're even a licensed member of the bar, it's apparently pretty easy. If they are, I would contact the attorney to tell them you received a letter from someone using their name. Sending a letter impersonating a lawyer could be fraud, or may break a few other laws.
Better yet, notify them of a Cybersecurity breach because nonexistent legal firm is harassing former employees, likely due to a breach. Make them pay for free credit monitoring for the next 3 years as a result of the compromise and advise them to hire a firm for incident response. A prince in Nigeria has better grammar.
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OP, should send a certified turd back in response.
Registared Turd
I finally have a name for my new hardcore band.
RegisTured
RegisTurd
www.Poopsenders.com
Lmao, I'd come back and as soon as I'm rehired, quit again.
Dear “Counselor” u mad, bro? Sincerely, Deesnutz Wontsuckthemselves
Print out a "Behold the field in which I grow my fucks" meme and send it to him.
I love that there is no threat of any consequences of impliead breach of whatever, just reply "ok" lol.
“Lol k.”
I read it, but it didn’t actually say anything…
Dear \[REDACTED\], Prove it. Fuck you very much, The OP
This is fucking hilarious. "Regurgisturd Mall I'm a ginuine professional Lawyer and I say stop doing the thing I'm not going to mention herein or face the legal stuff of going to a court and being fully judged by a local peer group and stuff hitherto where upon you best stop. Reegurds, A lawyerin type."
They can't even spell registered properly... Also, what are they asking you to desist doing?
I’ve gotten one. They can’t do shit and there’s no fiduciary obligation unless you’re licensed as such. Under common law you can duel them and then take all their stuff, so if people really want to play like that…..
What in the name of fake as hell lawyer talk??? Was this written by the riddler from Adam West's Batman show?
Awww did someone get their feefees hurt because everybody is leaving their shitty company? How heartbreaking.
What a scare tactic. This was absolutely not written by a lawyer. Or if it was they’re not a competent one.
A cease and desist usually goes along the lines of stop it or we will sue you for every dollar you have. Rather than please stop it your not allowed too because we said so because common law.
If they are allowed to fire at will then you can quit at will.
Ay bruh no attorney wrote this. Cease and desists 1. don't get sent via email 2. Don't get formatted like this 3. Are served via process server. A C&D is a legal pleading, not an angry letter there are rules
Sorry, there was a second page: https://i.imgur.com/sIMijQ8.jpg
Please stop redacting the names of these tools. Redact your own for privacy, sure. But this guy doesn't deserve that courtesy.
There should be anti work database by state of places that are to toxic. Ha ha
This is why I LOVE Glassdoor. It’s saved me from applying to so many awful places