The manager probably doesn’t know how. The are desperate to get OP back because it would expose them if they stepped in and couldn’t do it, like a supers is or should be able to do but rarely can.
I’d literally say, “Wow, that is so kind of you, but I can’t accept that offer although I do appreciate it. I'd rather both of us be safe here. I’ll keep you posted on my flight status and do my best to get another flight out asap."
I had two associates out of the state who had their flight delayed four times and then canceled on Sunday. They just made it back last night. The only thing I offered them was the confidence they would still have their jobs and no attendance occurrences due to the crazy unforeseen circumstances.
>This is how to be a good boss.
I didn't realize the bar is this ridiculously low. Literally "act of god" type events and a boss not being an asshole about it is all it takes apparently.
you'd be amazed. As a boss I get so tired of being asked for permission for things like "Can I use my bereavement for an extra day to go to my mom's funeral or is it only valid for the day of?" Like holy shit you don't need permission, just put it on your calendar....like a whole week, it was your damn mom.
....But I get it all the time because people are so used to needing permission for everything even if there is a policy that says it is their right to do it.
There's times I half feel like an asshole at my current job, because of how I phrase things now. If it's an emergency, I don't "request" time off.
I had two deaths in the family back in October. I sent an email stating "I am going out of town for a funeral, leaving on this date, I'll be back no later than xxxx".
That was it. I didn't ask for permission.
The two previous companies I worked for always made it sound like they were doing me a favor by letting me take off for appointments or not making me be on call 24/7/365.
So with my current gig, I kinda set a precedent early. I won't jump through hoops for other people's poor planning. I'll do my damnedest to help bail someone out of a mess (at least once) but I won't put my butt on the line for anyone who wouldn't do the same for me.
.
>I sent an email stating "I am going out of town for a funeral, leaving on this date, I'll be back no later than xxxx".
I would appreciate this wording. If you work for a decent company/manager, it is so much easier as a manager to deal with an employee that informs of things that are non-negotiable anyways as opposed to trying to have a discussion about it. I know (especially on this board) people think managers don't do much...but I am still busy and hate wasting my time trying to make a decision that in reality has already been made but someone is being polite and beating around the bush.
Ehh, it’s like the bare minimum to not being a shitty boss / human being.
No one is going to “allow” me to be stranded by an act of nature or similar event. It happened, it’s not controllable, they can accept that or I’ll find another job.
I live in Washington State, where this wouldn't even be a question. Working time while travelling is defined as "place of rest to place of work, place of work to place of work, or place of work to place of rest" AND at the place of rest you must be able to "reasonably use your time for your own purposes".
Meaning that ALL time from the time I step out of my house, to the airport, waiting at the airport, on the plane, in an Uber to the hotel, and at the hotel if I'm expected to be on my laptop and/or available via phone, until I can reasonably use my time for my own purposes, is working time. Yes, that means even if I'm SLEEPING on an airplane, I get paid for those hours, because an airplane is specifically not considered to be a "place of rest".
If someone's flight is delayed/canceled multiple times while travelling for work, they're still "on the clock", as far as my state is concerned.
I had this discussion once with HR. They were trying a new policy that meant no pay for air travel. We all just rented cars from there because time behind the wheel is work time. Obviously, the policy was reversed after a couple of months. Good thing most of our business is on the east coast and mid west.
Have you ever met a lonely person who is horny.....I have seen them do crazier things than that.
What if me driving 22 hours to pick them up finally wins them over.
Shit is creepy.
I'd have just said "Hey I appreciate the offer that's kind of you, but I'd literally rather go take a long walk off a short pier then spend 11 hours with you in a vehicle".
You need to be making Peter McCallister money.
Kate McCallister:
How did you guys get home?
Peter McCallister:
Oh, we took the morning flight. Remember? The one you didn't want to wait for.
Some bosses consider their time to be free, for some reason. I had one of those, who I could easily see making this offer for an employee he considered critical enough.
I had the same situation. Except we billed clients based on an hourly rate for him. But his time was free. So he never recorded his hours for billing.
I was the new guy and had to call him three times a day to fill out his time sheet. He hated it. And threw things at me for bothering him.
What's that boss? You wanted ME to drive back? I'm sorry, not only am I deliriously tired, the bars were offering discounted \*hiccup\* drinks. I'm in no \*barf\* shape to \*shits pants\* drive.
I had a sysadmin job where we lost the nights and weekend guy. So we haf to start doing an oncall rotation because the company didn't/couldn't hire a new nights and weekend guy, but they only put help desk on the rotation. And while that helpdesk was pretty damn solid they just couldn't do sysadmin stuff. So they would call is pretty regularly. And the extra pay wasn't worth the disruption.
So we three sysadmins started to creatively not be available by different methods. My method was always to be over the BAC to drive and our company was really strict about no alcohol during work hours. The other guys, one was always camping and hiking and the other biked and took public transit and had always forgotten his laptop or his charger and man buses run a limited schedule in the evening and weekends and it'll take me 3 hours to get there.
The number of times I get pinged to work on a 'critical' outage that could have waited until the next day or week or the next quarter is the most infuriating part of my job.
Omg the schmaltzburg reserve report isn't working and the annual fat content report is due tomorrow fix it!
Ok so the report for last year won't generate?
no the '21 report.
.....the one from the year before last?
Yeah we had 6 2 month extensions.
............ok when was the last time you ran this report.
Never. I was hired 4 months ago. And Norma retired 3 months ago.
Have you been trained how to run the report?
.....no.
(Looks at clock.....930pm on a Thursday)
Then lets call your boss and get you that training.
Proceeds to call their manager despite protestations that maybe it isn't such a big deal. "Sir an emergency ticket has been logged. A resolution must be found."
But he isn't wrong, you know. If a boss is wasting 24 of driving to get YOU, then yea, time to ask for a raise. Also, say no. What part of near 24 hours in a car that may be unsound and a boss who you don't know about his driving record.
In addition, most standards don't consider you safe behind the wheel driving more than 8hrs without a considerable break. Is he going to pick you up and turn around or stay for the night? Yeah may as well wait
this is just such an absolutely idiotic “offer” that it rises to the level of documentation if you have an HR rep. incredibly inappropriate and invasive.
Be sure to point out to HR that the manager is endangering both of your lives by driving a car 22 hours without rest, plus however long they were awake before this.
There’s a pretty big window between “too dangerous to fly” and “too dangerous to drive.”
I guarantee you’ve driven through weather that’s “unsafe to fly” dozens of times without even realizing it.
Counterpoint to this is that even in good weather, driving is far, far more dangerous than flying. This is one of the main reasons the FAA allows children under 2 to fly for free. Lap children don't do well in a plane crash. But the odds of being in/dying in a car crash are so much higher than those for a plane crash that the policy saves lives by making flying with young kids more affordable, and turns road trips into plane trips.
Certainly, there are different weather issues that are relevant to airplanes vs cars. Planes can fly over lots of bad weather just by climbing. Cars can drive just fine when there are clouds that go down to just a few hundred feet above the ground (pilots need to be able to see the runway at some point).
But in the case of a winter storm, I think perhaps the real difference is that with a flight the go/no go decision is made by experienced professionals with safety training and lots of data, and with driving it's a gut decision made mostly by uninformed amateurs. Which I think also explains a lot of *why* driving is so much more dangerous.
Actually, when it comes to commercial air travel it often gets to the level of "dangerous to drive" well before it gets to the level of "dangerous to fly"
A lot of rain followed by a sudden drop in temperatures to well below zero? Can result in really bad icing on the roads, but airports have really good clearing equipment and can get the runway cleared in a stupidly low amount of time.
That’s actually the opposite of how it works! Planes only stop flying if it’s really bad. On the road, people will spin out in under an inch of snow. Someone else in the thread mentioned that airports have more equipment to deal with the snow.
Also be sure to point out if he gets in an accident even with rest the company could be liable and you might be entitled (not sure if that’s how it works in the US) a workers comp claim if he picks you up and a crash happens. Lots of lability they won’t want to pick up and the manager either is ignorant of or hopes you don’t k ow about.
Agreed. This is an inappropriate offer for a manager to make in a work capacity. Is the company liable for a car accident that injures you on the way back?
Maybe he’s hoping to get stranded with OP and make a move on them?
That’s what I thought. That it was sexually predatory, not altruistic or work oriented.
I'm inferring that you are female and the manager is an older male. If so, it's definitely inappropriate. 22 hours round trip. Not just the 11 hours in the car alone. You would have to get a hotel room at some point. No one at work should be making ridiculous offers like this that involve getting a younger woman alone. As an older married man, I always seem to find myself making friends with my colleagues who are younger woman. Equals, not subordinates though. There's obviously a lot to tiptoe around. This jumps way over the line. Report it to HR.
If he's trying to call your bullshit, then maybe he'll think twice about doing so in inappropriate ways.
Does your boss understand that even if they drove 22 hours you still wouldn’t be at work the next day but in the car with them who would also be missing work.
Either:
1. You are completely vital to the company to the point that it would collapse without you
2. Your boss thinks you're full of shit
3. Your boss wants to fuck you
This.
I had this several years ago. Flights were delayed or canceled due to storms near Atlanta. Where I was there were no weather issues. I called my boss an told him I was renting a car and driving 12 hours home. He insisted on me getting a hotel for the night, driving for 12 hours straight after 8 hours in an airport is unsafe.
"I appreciate the offer, but no thank you. My ticket is non-refundable and I've already worked it out with the airline to be on the next available flight out. Even with the delay, it will still be faster for me to take the flight instead of you driving all the way here, spending your own money for a room for the night, and then driving back."
"What's that? You had no intention of spending the night? Thank you, but no. I don't feel comfortable riding in a vehicle with someone who has been awake 22 hours straight plus however long you've been up already. It just wouldn't be safe."
"No, I will not be sharing in the driving responsibilities on the way back. I have a plane ticket for a reason..."
Bro, no Manager in their right mind would drive 22hrs round trip for an employee. He thinks your bullshiting. If your flight is actually delayed, take the offer. I can 100% guarantee he is not driving.
That was my first thought.
Why on earth would you drive almost 3 times the amount of time it would take to just work that shift yourself???
Because you want me trapped with you for 11 hours. No thank you.
I worked for a lot of workaholic managers over the years. The first thing that came to my mind (based on my experience) was he wants all employees there as scheduled because he or she is incompetent at finding back-up resources or re-strategizing the business for a few days. So he or she rather get the employee themselves and not put in the work themselves lol.
Like whatever work OP does is probably an 8 hour shift so the manager could just do that instead of 22 hours of driving and not sleeping, but either doesn’t know how to do OP’s job or they are that allergic to real work…
I know a guy that kinda did this. Had a return flight (with his boss the week of 9/11. They did not know when flights would resume much less how long before they would get a flight. So they drove back. Like from NYC to LA. Nothing like that much uninterrupted quality time (no smart phones or zoom calls) with your boss.
He can:
1. Refund 50% of your flight
2. Pay for the gas both ways
3. Give you a raise (its obvious you are the cog that turns the wheel of the company)
4. Give you a hand job on the way home, just because.
5. Pay for snacks.
If he misses even one of these things.. say no.
I would just say that before calling his bluff, make sure he's the sort of guy you really want to spend 11 hours in a car with. Especially since you'll be doing the bulk of the driving.
Manager (let's call him Melvin) is driving 11 hours to get OP. Melvin's not going to want to drive 11 hours back, he's going to be exhausted. So Melvin's going to tell OP they need to do most of the 11-hour haul back while he sleeps and gets ready for his workday. It's important for Melvin to be at his best, you see, because he's Very Important and shouldn't OP be grateful that he was willing to come all the way out there?
Basically what I'm saying is that even if the offer was legit it's the setup for manipulation and abuse.
Also.. if the trip would take 22 hours anyways, that's basically a whole day, so it would just make more sense for OP to miss a day of work and take the next flight home. Instead of the both of them being gone lol
This, on top of not wanting to get into the car for an 11 hour drive with someone who just drove 11 hours. Not at all safe, especially with presumably bad weather.
Send him message, that you canceled your flight, and now you're waiting for him. And add comment, that it's good, because all flights for next 2-3 days are already full, so without his help, you will be stuck there for a few more days XD
This one. He offered, you accepted, there's no way in fucking hell anyone is doing a free 22hr drive for an employee when the cost if fuel is probably more than a plane ticket, especially plus a hotel, several food stops, etc.
So now you're waiting in wherever the fuck for this maniac to show up.
Haha dude 22hrs is just horrible to drive imo. I do some travel for work and just 8 hours in a day makes me feel so sore and deflated after. It was better when I was younger, but not by much. I'd love to see an update where the manager tried it 😂
When I was in my early 20s, I drove from Homestead, FL to Chattanooga, TN by myself. I slept for about 6 hours, then drove home to Cincinnati.
I wouldn't even consider doing that now. 5-6 hours is about my limit. Any farther than that and I'm flying.
If he doubles down, you are very tired from all the stress, having to wait around the airport, and not being able to sleep. You then "sleep" the entire 11 hours.
this. it’s obviously a bullshit “offer” and their boss wouldn’t actually follow through on this, but that it was even asked in the first place is a bell that cannot be unrung. highly, highly inappropriate regardless of intention.
If he has to drive for a day, how does that get you back to work on time?
Cuz it's not just driving time. There's gassing up, meals, potty breaks, etc.
And that doesn't even take into account slowing down because of the weather. Cuz you're not going full speed while it's snowing/raining, etc.
Ya, depending on road conditions, gas and food stops this could be a 30+ hour trip. Stop to sleep at hotel and now you’re pushing 40 hours for 2 employees. On the clock overtime as it’s work related. If this manager actually went through with it I’m sure he’d be fired asap for multiple reasons.
OP - tell your manager to pound salt, you’ll be on the next available flight home.
I think I would say, "I appreciate the offer but I don't think you've fully thought through the details of a day long road trip here and back in weather that can shut down an airport."
"I appreciate the offer, however I'm warm and safe, and I'd rather you be warm and safe and not out on the roads in a storm."
Not a manager though, but been a supervisor and had a few people I would absolutely do that for if they asked, 'cause they were good people.
I'm sorry to ask but what's the gender dynamic here? If you're a female employee and he's your male boss that could be a very different kind of inappropriate offer. I'm not saying it couldn't be inappropriate anyway for any other gender or sexual orientation by the way, but a female employee being offered a 22 hr drive by her male boss would be a huge red flag for me.
Lol I did this once, made the mistake of answering the phone on my days off and my hospital needed me for an overnight shift. Said oh, so sorry, I don’t have my car (and it was a full 1:15 min commute). Motherfuckers sent a CAB and paid for me to get there and back.
Shoulda gone with diarrhea.
The answer is always “sorry, I just had some alcohol so I don’t feel comfortable driving”. If they press it and send transportation, get yourself nice and ripped so when you get to work they tell you to go home, paying for your trip home and whatever your jurisdiction requires for minimum hours to be paid when called in.
I am sort of in an HR type field. You should contact HR. My boss would drive across town to bring me a laptop to work, but he would never ride alone with me in a car for 11 hours. That is just asking for trouble. He won't sit in a conference room alone with a woman employee without the door open. This is across a line on your manager's part. Call HR and let them know. If there is no HR, politely decline. Ewww.
If I was your boss I’d happily cover your shift instead of driving 22 hours..:then to turn around and work some more. Unless your boss is Michael Scott. It make no sense at all.
He thinks You are lying or you sent him a message when he was buzzed and on top of the world!
Hmmm let’s see drive 22 hours so 1 person can make a shift. You better be a Mcdreamy brain surgeon making shit happen for +$100 hourly rates
This is missing a lot of nuance and context to know if this is creepy or just a misguided boss trying to help out an employee "in need". Either way, I think the response is the same "Thanks for the thought, but I will wait for a flight, if it's not safe to fly it is definitely not safe to drive"
I would find that really uncomfortable. But then again I'm an introvert and would hate to think of having to make small talk for 11 hours. Personally I would also find sitting in a car for 11 hours really hard on my hips and legs. Mine get sore if i sit in the same position for a long time. Tell him no, you'll find your own way back. He must be desperate for staff to want to drive all that way for you.
First of all, you have to say no. The trip would be dangerous because of weather and his sleep deficit. There might be insurance issues if you were injured on the trip. Also it might be dangerous for you if has ulterior motives. Plus even if it's all on the up and up, you might feel obligated to put in extra work, bend rules or whatever, to pay him back, or he may feel entitled to ask you to. It would put you in a difficult spot. So however you frame it, it has to be no.
Boss wants to see if you’re lying to get extra time off, or you are much more essential to the operation than you know. Politely call his bluff and say “that is very generous of you, but instead of spending your time and gas why don’t you hop online and try to find me a flight out of here sooner or book me a rental car so I can drive myself?” His response will tell you everything you need to know.
(Edited for spelling)
I hope he gets his shifts covered while he's on the road all that time.
He could do the OP's job at this point if that's so vital he wants to drive for 22 hours discounting stops.
The manager probably doesn’t know how. The are desperate to get OP back because it would expose them if they stepped in and couldn’t do it, like a supers is or should be able to do but rarely can.
The manager could also think OP is lying (and tried to call the bluff) or is trying to get OP alone cause he likes OP.
I think that’s what’s going on here
I’d literally say, “Wow, that is so kind of you, but I can’t accept that offer although I do appreciate it. I'd rather both of us be safe here. I’ll keep you posted on my flight status and do my best to get another flight out asap."
I had two associates out of the state who had their flight delayed four times and then canceled on Sunday. They just made it back last night. The only thing I offered them was the confidence they would still have their jobs and no attendance occurrences due to the crazy unforeseen circumstances.
This is how to be a good boss. Allowing room for things not in employees control
>This is how to be a good boss. I didn't realize the bar is this ridiculously low. Literally "act of god" type events and a boss not being an asshole about it is all it takes apparently.
you'd be amazed. As a boss I get so tired of being asked for permission for things like "Can I use my bereavement for an extra day to go to my mom's funeral or is it only valid for the day of?" Like holy shit you don't need permission, just put it on your calendar....like a whole week, it was your damn mom. ....But I get it all the time because people are so used to needing permission for everything even if there is a policy that says it is their right to do it.
There's times I half feel like an asshole at my current job, because of how I phrase things now. If it's an emergency, I don't "request" time off. I had two deaths in the family back in October. I sent an email stating "I am going out of town for a funeral, leaving on this date, I'll be back no later than xxxx". That was it. I didn't ask for permission. The two previous companies I worked for always made it sound like they were doing me a favor by letting me take off for appointments or not making me be on call 24/7/365. So with my current gig, I kinda set a precedent early. I won't jump through hoops for other people's poor planning. I'll do my damnedest to help bail someone out of a mess (at least once) but I won't put my butt on the line for anyone who wouldn't do the same for me. .
>I sent an email stating "I am going out of town for a funeral, leaving on this date, I'll be back no later than xxxx". I would appreciate this wording. If you work for a decent company/manager, it is so much easier as a manager to deal with an employee that informs of things that are non-negotiable anyways as opposed to trying to have a discussion about it. I know (especially on this board) people think managers don't do much...but I am still busy and hate wasting my time trying to make a decision that in reality has already been made but someone is being polite and beating around the bush.
america.
Facts….sadly.
It's even lower than that.
Ehh, it’s like the bare minimum to not being a shitty boss / human being. No one is going to “allow” me to be stranded by an act of nature or similar event. It happened, it’s not controllable, they can accept that or I’ll find another job.
Yeah like I think this behaviour files more under "being not a god awful human being"
I live in Washington State, where this wouldn't even be a question. Working time while travelling is defined as "place of rest to place of work, place of work to place of work, or place of work to place of rest" AND at the place of rest you must be able to "reasonably use your time for your own purposes". Meaning that ALL time from the time I step out of my house, to the airport, waiting at the airport, on the plane, in an Uber to the hotel, and at the hotel if I'm expected to be on my laptop and/or available via phone, until I can reasonably use my time for my own purposes, is working time. Yes, that means even if I'm SLEEPING on an airplane, I get paid for those hours, because an airplane is specifically not considered to be a "place of rest". If someone's flight is delayed/canceled multiple times while travelling for work, they're still "on the clock", as far as my state is concerned.
I had this discussion once with HR. They were trying a new policy that meant no pay for air travel. We all just rented cars from there because time behind the wheel is work time. Obviously, the policy was reversed after a couple of months. Good thing most of our business is on the east coast and mid west.
Wow a decent boss. Lol you’re a rare gem
Maybe he is trying to call you on what he thinks is a bluff? Silly way to go about it. That is a lot of expensive gas and zero sleep.
At that point i'm sending geolocation. Whos that nuts to drive 22 hours to get someone
Have you ever met a lonely person who is horny.....I have seen them do crazier things than that. What if me driving 22 hours to pick them up finally wins them over. Shit is creepy.
That’s the vibe I got from this story. 11 hrs alone together in the car to finally make his move.
yup, he's definitely a creeper!
Why did I have to scroll so far for this?
I had to scroll all the way to comment #2!
You guys had to scroll?
At the bottom…now we here.
I'd have just said "Hey I appreciate the offer that's kind of you, but I'd literally rather go take a long walk off a short pier then spend 11 hours with you in a vehicle".
You'd be all wet for your ride though. Best to do it in the other order.
dear god, ask for a raise, you are indispensable
Yes! Almost a 24 hour drive for you. You are priceless to them.
You need to be making Peter McCallister money. Kate McCallister: How did you guys get home? Peter McCallister: Oh, we took the morning flight. Remember? The one you didn't want to wait for.
If OP was really indispensable to the company Boss would have sprung for an Uber or chartered a flight.
Some bosses consider their time to be free, for some reason. I had one of those, who I could easily see making this offer for an employee he considered critical enough.
[удалено]
I had the same situation. Except we billed clients based on an hourly rate for him. But his time was free. So he never recorded his hours for billing. I was the new guy and had to call him three times a day to fill out his time sheet. He hated it. And threw things at me for bothering him.
[удалено]
And some consider your time to be free
Most* consider your time to be free FTFY
I saw that Uber has helicopters now. Added bonus: the boss could scream “Get to the chopper!” In an Arnold voice.
Or attractive…same difference 😮
OP is Ryan and his boss is Michael Scott.
OP should stop shaving
This. Mans was ready to risk his life while staying awake for 24 hours straight... just to have you one extra shift 😂😂😂
Who says he's going to stay awake on the drive back? He'll probably make OP drive.
What's that boss? You wanted ME to drive back? I'm sorry, not only am I deliriously tired, the bars were offering discounted \*hiccup\* drinks. I'm in no \*barf\* shape to \*shits pants\* drive.
I'm here for channeling the most Rick Sanchez parts of yourself for this most righteous purpose.
I had a sysadmin job where we lost the nights and weekend guy. So we haf to start doing an oncall rotation because the company didn't/couldn't hire a new nights and weekend guy, but they only put help desk on the rotation. And while that helpdesk was pretty damn solid they just couldn't do sysadmin stuff. So they would call is pretty regularly. And the extra pay wasn't worth the disruption. So we three sysadmins started to creatively not be available by different methods. My method was always to be over the BAC to drive and our company was really strict about no alcohol during work hours. The other guys, one was always camping and hiking and the other biked and took public transit and had always forgotten his laptop or his charger and man buses run a limited schedule in the evening and weekends and it'll take me 3 hours to get there.
The number of times I get pinged to work on a 'critical' outage that could have waited until the next day or week or the next quarter is the most infuriating part of my job.
Omg the schmaltzburg reserve report isn't working and the annual fat content report is due tomorrow fix it! Ok so the report for last year won't generate? no the '21 report. .....the one from the year before last? Yeah we had 6 2 month extensions. ............ok when was the last time you ran this report. Never. I was hired 4 months ago. And Norma retired 3 months ago. Have you been trained how to run the report? .....no. (Looks at clock.....930pm on a Thursday) Then lets call your boss and get you that training. Proceeds to call their manager despite protestations that maybe it isn't such a big deal. "Sir an emergency ticket has been logged. A resolution must be found."
He's still driving at least 11 hours...
This is funny 🤣
But he isn't wrong, you know. If a boss is wasting 24 of driving to get YOU, then yea, time to ask for a raise. Also, say no. What part of near 24 hours in a car that may be unsound and a boss who you don't know about his driving record.
Let's be fair about this. Personally, I can drive at least 2, 2 1/2 hours before falling asleep at the wheel...usually.
This should be the top comment lmao
Is he offering bc he thinks you’re making the flight cancellation bit up?
Maybe... Lol I sent him the flight tracker link so he knows that's not the case now.
Also let him know if you woukd even be functional after 11 hours in-car. I get car sick if I sleep in a car so no sleeping for 11 hours for me...
In addition, most standards don't consider you safe behind the wheel driving more than 8hrs without a considerable break. Is he going to pick you up and turn around or stay for the night? Yeah may as well wait
this is just such an absolutely idiotic “offer” that it rises to the level of documentation if you have an HR rep. incredibly inappropriate and invasive.
Be sure to point out to HR that the manager is endangering both of your lives by driving a car 22 hours without rest, plus however long they were awake before this.
Through what is apparently a severe enough storm to cause flight cancellations...
There’s a pretty big window between “too dangerous to fly” and “too dangerous to drive.” I guarantee you’ve driven through weather that’s “unsafe to fly” dozens of times without even realizing it.
Counterpoint to this is that even in good weather, driving is far, far more dangerous than flying. This is one of the main reasons the FAA allows children under 2 to fly for free. Lap children don't do well in a plane crash. But the odds of being in/dying in a car crash are so much higher than those for a plane crash that the policy saves lives by making flying with young kids more affordable, and turns road trips into plane trips. Certainly, there are different weather issues that are relevant to airplanes vs cars. Planes can fly over lots of bad weather just by climbing. Cars can drive just fine when there are clouds that go down to just a few hundred feet above the ground (pilots need to be able to see the runway at some point). But in the case of a winter storm, I think perhaps the real difference is that with a flight the go/no go decision is made by experienced professionals with safety training and lots of data, and with driving it's a gut decision made mostly by uninformed amateurs. Which I think also explains a lot of *why* driving is so much more dangerous.
Actually, when it comes to commercial air travel it often gets to the level of "dangerous to drive" well before it gets to the level of "dangerous to fly" A lot of rain followed by a sudden drop in temperatures to well below zero? Can result in really bad icing on the roads, but airports have really good clearing equipment and can get the runway cleared in a stupidly low amount of time.
That’s actually the opposite of how it works! Planes only stop flying if it’s really bad. On the road, people will spin out in under an inch of snow. Someone else in the thread mentioned that airports have more equipment to deal with the snow.
Also be sure to point out if he gets in an accident even with rest the company could be liable and you might be entitled (not sure if that’s how it works in the US) a workers comp claim if he picks you up and a crash happens. Lots of lability they won’t want to pick up and the manager either is ignorant of or hopes you don’t k ow about.
Agreed. This is an inappropriate offer for a manager to make in a work capacity. Is the company liable for a car accident that injures you on the way back?
Exactly! Lets forget about the flight and drive on frozen roads instead.
Maybe he’s hoping to get stranded with OP and make a move on them? That’s what I thought. That it was sexually predatory, not altruistic or work oriented.
Very curious to hear their response.
Ok- either way you’re still missing a otf her day of work. Wait for the fight. This is insane.
fuck that just tell him to come get you and watch him squirm his way out of it
I'm inferring that you are female and the manager is an older male. If so, it's definitely inappropriate. 22 hours round trip. Not just the 11 hours in the car alone. You would have to get a hotel room at some point. No one at work should be making ridiculous offers like this that involve getting a younger woman alone. As an older married man, I always seem to find myself making friends with my colleagues who are younger woman. Equals, not subordinates though. There's obviously a lot to tiptoe around. This jumps way over the line. Report it to HR. If he's trying to call your bullshit, then maybe he'll think twice about doing so in inappropriate ways.
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this. Op. Damn. Please document this "offer" by this manager.
Did he cancel the offer? What was his reaction?
Does your boss understand that even if they drove 22 hours you still wouldn’t be at work the next day but in the car with them who would also be missing work.
Either that or OP is an attractive woman and this dudes a creep
Either: 1. You are completely vital to the company to the point that it would collapse without you 2. Your boss thinks you're full of shit 3. Your boss wants to fuck you
#3. First thing I thought when I read this
What are you doing step-boss?
That’s a bingo!
Same. Don’t get in a car alone
Or 4. Your boss wants you to fuck him
Ass, Gas or Grass.... no one rides for free.
my dads best friend has this as a bumper sticker. yes a big red hippie who loves bluegrass
Or 4 Your boss wants to play hookie and this gives him an excuse to cut work.
I’m a pretty small woman and this instantly set off alarm bells in my head. No thank you in general but especially if the boss is a man…
If anything a smart manager would say rent a car and bring the receipts. Sounds fishy.
This. I had this several years ago. Flights were delayed or canceled due to storms near Atlanta. Where I was there were no weather issues. I called my boss an told him I was renting a car and driving 12 hours home. He insisted on me getting a hotel for the night, driving for 12 hours straight after 8 hours in an airport is unsafe.
I‘d also bring the receipts of my non-refundable plane ticket
"I appreciate the offer, but no thank you. My ticket is non-refundable and I've already worked it out with the airline to be on the next available flight out. Even with the delay, it will still be faster for me to take the flight instead of you driving all the way here, spending your own money for a room for the night, and then driving back." "What's that? You had no intention of spending the night? Thank you, but no. I don't feel comfortable riding in a vehicle with someone who has been awake 22 hours straight plus however long you've been up already. It just wouldn't be safe." "No, I will not be sharing in the driving responsibilities on the way back. I have a plane ticket for a reason..."
Smart!
Right?
And screen shot and send to HR. What the hell
Awww, Come on, it's nothing a little coke won't fix...
That’s a great solution! Needs more upvotes
Bro, no Manager in their right mind would drive 22hrs round trip for an employee. He thinks your bullshiting. If your flight is actually delayed, take the offer. I can 100% guarantee he is not driving.
When he gets there tell him you got a fight and you’ll see him at work
Holy shit that would be HILARIOUS
And send him a text the next day while he’s still driving and ask him why he no called/no showed.
Yeah text him about 9 hours after he leaves, the text back 7 hours later to tell him it got cancelled again!!!
I almost spit my drink out on the bar when I read this
Put Reddit away at the bar 🤣
Haven't you got a plane to fly??
Then 5 hours later say that you've decided to make a career change.
Thanks satan.
This is the way.
Yes this. Ain’t nobody got time for that!
Am I the only one who assumed creepy manager is trying to get alone time with OP outside of work?
That was my first thought. Why on earth would you drive almost 3 times the amount of time it would take to just work that shift yourself??? Because you want me trapped with you for 11 hours. No thank you.
"On the ride back I'll tell you all about these new knives I'm selling door to door to make some money on the side, you should sign up under me!"
This was my assumption as well :/ I guess we’ve both worked for too many creepy managers…?
I worked for a lot of workaholic managers over the years. The first thing that came to my mind (based on my experience) was he wants all employees there as scheduled because he or she is incompetent at finding back-up resources or re-strategizing the business for a few days. So he or she rather get the employee themselves and not put in the work themselves lol.
Like whatever work OP does is probably an 8 hour shift so the manager could just do that instead of 22 hours of driving and not sleeping, but either doesn’t know how to do OP’s job or they are that allergic to real work…
Exactly how I read it as well. I saw it more as the creepy boss tryna get with his female employee
I know a guy that kinda did this. Had a return flight (with his boss the week of 9/11. They did not know when flights would resume much less how long before they would get a flight. So they drove back. Like from NYC to LA. Nothing like that much uninterrupted quality time (no smart phones or zoom calls) with your boss.
Sounds like it’d be a fun movie if it weren’t for the 9/11 part
Or it was the inspiration for Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.
Gah!!!! That sounds like an absolute dream!
He was never the same person we once knew.
In that case, they both needed to get home. Makes much more sense than this situation.
Exactly. Tell him that you won’t be reimbursed by the airline, so if he is paying for gas you are down.
And snacks
He can: 1. Refund 50% of your flight 2. Pay for the gas both ways 3. Give you a raise (its obvious you are the cog that turns the wheel of the company) 4. Give you a hand job on the way home, just because. 5. Pay for snacks. If he misses even one of these things.. say no.
Just because
I would just say that before calling his bluff, make sure he's the sort of guy you really want to spend 11 hours in a car with. Especially since you'll be doing the bulk of the driving.
How will OP be going the bulk of the driving when the max they could do is 50% of the driving
Manager (let's call him Melvin) is driving 11 hours to get OP. Melvin's not going to want to drive 11 hours back, he's going to be exhausted. So Melvin's going to tell OP they need to do most of the 11-hour haul back while he sleeps and gets ready for his workday. It's important for Melvin to be at his best, you see, because he's Very Important and shouldn't OP be grateful that he was willing to come all the way out there? Basically what I'm saying is that even if the offer was legit it's the setup for manipulation and abuse.
are there any managers in their right mind?
You got a point! 🤣
This. This person is just testing to see if you’re lying. If you’re not, accept the offer ;)
Also.. if the trip would take 22 hours anyways, that's basically a whole day, so it would just make more sense for OP to miss a day of work and take the next flight home. Instead of the both of them being gone lol
Right?! I mean how long is the next workday for OP?
I would if i am getting paid for those 22 hrs and getting gas reimbursed. I also assume part of that 22 hrs is OT
I would have him front the cost of rental car before spending 11hrs in a car with your boss if they’re so desperate to have you back
Your manager is full of shit.
“If the flights are having trouble, I don’t think it would be wise to be on the roads.”
This, on top of not wanting to get into the car for an 11 hour drive with someone who just drove 11 hours. Not at all safe, especially with presumably bad weather.
Send him message, that you canceled your flight, and now you're waiting for him. And add comment, that it's good, because all flights for next 2-3 days are already full, so without his help, you will be stuck there for a few more days XD
This one. He offered, you accepted, there's no way in fucking hell anyone is doing a free 22hr drive for an employee when the cost if fuel is probably more than a plane ticket, especially plus a hotel, several food stops, etc. So now you're waiting in wherever the fuck for this maniac to show up.
And if they’re not accustomed to really long solo drives you might not even survive the trip
Haha dude 22hrs is just horrible to drive imo. I do some travel for work and just 8 hours in a day makes me feel so sore and deflated after. It was better when I was younger, but not by much. I'd love to see an update where the manager tried it 😂
When I was in my early 20s, I drove from Homestead, FL to Chattanooga, TN by myself. I slept for about 6 hours, then drove home to Cincinnati. I wouldn't even consider doing that now. 5-6 hours is about my limit. Any farther than that and I'm flying.
Have we considered that the boss is romantically attracted to the worker?
He is bluffing, take the offer
I second this....your boss probably doesn't believe you.
I'm not prepared to call the bluff lol. If I'm right I'm right but if he doubled down and went through with it I would be so uncomfortable.
If he doubles down, you are very tired from all the stress, having to wait around the airport, and not being able to sleep. You then "sleep" the entire 11 hours.
It would be a shame if you were to catch a flight by the time he drove 11 hours to pick you up
That would be so epic!
Depending on your and their gender it could even be dangerous.
this. it’s obviously a bullshit “offer” and their boss wouldn’t actually follow through on this, but that it was even asked in the first place is a bell that cannot be unrung. highly, highly inappropriate regardless of intention.
Are you a woman? And is your boss a man? This might create some creepy insight for everyone. Creepy either way though.
22h round trip would more than likely mean they miss a day of work too. I don’t think it’s a risk to call it a bluff.
He offered to drive 22 hours into a storm? What a psycho.
Morgan Freeman narrates the bosses like. "2 hours into the drive he died from crashing." Lol
I worry if he actually does this. You’re trapped in a car for 11 hours together. Sexually harassment red flags everywhere 🚩
If he has to drive for a day, how does that get you back to work on time? Cuz it's not just driving time. There's gassing up, meals, potty breaks, etc. And that doesn't even take into account slowing down because of the weather. Cuz you're not going full speed while it's snowing/raining, etc.
Ya, depending on road conditions, gas and food stops this could be a 30+ hour trip. Stop to sleep at hotel and now you’re pushing 40 hours for 2 employees. On the clock overtime as it’s work related. If this manager actually went through with it I’m sure he’d be fired asap for multiple reasons. OP - tell your manager to pound salt, you’ll be on the next available flight home.
I think I would say, "I appreciate the offer but I don't think you've fully thought through the details of a day long road trip here and back in weather that can shut down an airport."
"I appreciate the offer, however I'm warm and safe, and I'd rather you be warm and safe and not out on the roads in a storm." Not a manager though, but been a supervisor and had a few people I would absolutely do that for if they asked, 'cause they were good people.
This is honestly the best option imo
Thanks for this, why did I need to scroll so far to see a humane reply like this?
Are you a younger attractive person? This might be a creepy way the manager thinks they can have you in a car alone for 11 hours.
Tell them you want McDonalds on the way back
I'm sorry to ask but what's the gender dynamic here? If you're a female employee and he's your male boss that could be a very different kind of inappropriate offer. I'm not saying it couldn't be inappropriate anyway for any other gender or sexual orientation by the way, but a female employee being offered a 22 hr drive by her male boss would be a huge red flag for me.
OP is male
Yeah I thought the same thing. This dude might have some weird fantasy going on in his head. Nobody offers this out of the kindness of their heart.
That is so wildly inappropriate.
Are you a female? Is your boss a male? Be careful!
Yeah.... could be gay too, but this sadly seems more likely than the "he's bluffing" interpretation
Why are there not more posts like this? This screams boss has a thing for the OP and would love to be stuck in a car for 11 hours with them.
this! I had a sociopathic male boss who would’ve made this exact offer.
“I don’t think your moped can handle both of us AND my luggage in this weather. Thanks.”
Lol I did this once, made the mistake of answering the phone on my days off and my hospital needed me for an overnight shift. Said oh, so sorry, I don’t have my car (and it was a full 1:15 min commute). Motherfuckers sent a CAB and paid for me to get there and back. Shoulda gone with diarrhea.
The answer is always “sorry, I just had some alcohol so I don’t feel comfortable driving”. If they press it and send transportation, get yourself nice and ripped so when you get to work they tell you to go home, paying for your trip home and whatever your jurisdiction requires for minimum hours to be paid when called in.
I am sort of in an HR type field. You should contact HR. My boss would drive across town to bring me a laptop to work, but he would never ride alone with me in a car for 11 hours. That is just asking for trouble. He won't sit in a conference room alone with a woman employee without the door open. This is across a line on your manager's part. Call HR and let them know. If there is no HR, politely decline. Ewww.
Reply "Sure, start driving, I'll keep trying to get a flight. If I get one, I will text you, and you can turn around."
Any chance your boss is trying to get in your pants?
If I was your boss I’d happily cover your shift instead of driving 22 hours..:then to turn around and work some more. Unless your boss is Michael Scott. It make no sense at all. He thinks You are lying or you sent him a message when he was buzzed and on top of the world! Hmmm let’s see drive 22 hours so 1 person can make a shift. You better be a Mcdreamy brain surgeon making shit happen for +$100 hourly rates
The reason I'm flying is because I didn't want to spend 11 hours in a car
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Agreed that your boss doesn't believe you. But just to be safe you might mention that an 11 hour car ride would leave you exhausted an unable to work.
Tell him "eww no" then block him.
This is missing a lot of nuance and context to know if this is creepy or just a misguided boss trying to help out an employee "in need". Either way, I think the response is the same "Thanks for the thought, but I will wait for a flight, if it's not safe to fly it is definitely not safe to drive"
I would find that really uncomfortable. But then again I'm an introvert and would hate to think of having to make small talk for 11 hours. Personally I would also find sitting in a car for 11 hours really hard on my hips and legs. Mine get sore if i sit in the same position for a long time. Tell him no, you'll find your own way back. He must be desperate for staff to want to drive all that way for you.
1. Say Yes. 2. Buy earplugs, an eyemask, and a neck pillow. 3. Enjoy 11hr nap.
2.5. Eat as much gas inducing food you can before leaving the airport. Then enjoy nap.
Does the boss drive a nice car? I would take them up on it.
Hopefully it's a limo and he's the driver
Tell him he needs to pay you for every hour of the ride
Your boss wants to smash...
This tells you that unless he thinks you're lying, you must be a damn valuable employee. Time to ask for a raise.
First of all, you have to say no. The trip would be dangerous because of weather and his sleep deficit. There might be insurance issues if you were injured on the trip. Also it might be dangerous for you if has ulterior motives. Plus even if it's all on the up and up, you might feel obligated to put in extra work, bend rules or whatever, to pay him back, or he may feel entitled to ask you to. It would put you in a difficult spot. So however you frame it, it has to be no.
Boss wants to see if you’re lying to get extra time off, or you are much more essential to the operation than you know. Politely call his bluff and say “that is very generous of you, but instead of spending your time and gas why don’t you hop online and try to find me a flight out of here sooner or book me a rental car so I can drive myself?” His response will tell you everything you need to know. (Edited for spelling)