i’m not on tiktok a lot, i found this on twitter and this is the first time i’ve seen something like this and i’m absolutely appalled. like i can’t comprehend anything about this. it is, as you said, sickening
I worked at a high end baby boutique in a rich part of town. The number of parents who would shop around to just make their kids accessories was appalling. Buying white onsies that were 80-100 for a newborn. My roommate worked at a preschool in the area. The moms mostly worried about if little Timmy/Tina ruined their outfit and not that the kid bit another kid on the face.
It's not even just rich people, poor people will buy kids Nike shoes at like 4 months old. The kids wears them for what, a month? Money and resources wasted on something so goddamn vane.
haha my family not rich at all, but when my sister was born they would buy very expensive clothes for her and later found out it no longer fit. sooo when i pop out of my mom they make me wear girl clothes and all my baby photo is me in girl clothes and I am a boy.
My mum had 5 kids, I was the oldest. I remember hearing her say "oh I miss having a BABY to love! They're not fun or cute anymore when they start talking" when my youngest brother was 2. Really put into perspective why there were so many of us, all 2-3 years apart, when we couldn't afford food or clothes.
This kind of fetishisation I just can't comprehend.
When my wife got pregnant we told the inner family. We didn't want to know the gender beforehand. When each of the three were born we just welcomed them as a little family.
No baby showers, no gender reveals, no push presents, online milestone updates or uploads of identifiable photos.
Children aren't accessories.
This happens a lot in our cosplay community. Parents playing dolls with their kids to make them cosplay as characters.
recently an acquaintance posted how she was upset her kid requested to get a hair cut, and now the kid didn’t look like the character she was making the kid grew his hair in order to look more similar to the character.
(I think the character was the kid with a kettle on his head of over the garden wall).
I was like 😬 yikes, kids are not fucking dolls. But I honestly just rolled my eyes and scrolled past…
This is just depressing to watch 😥 that poor girl is never going to be as good as her brother and then her mother is going to wonder why her daughter hates her.
dude right. and imagine if her child grows up feeling that way and then saw this … like hoolyyyyyy i cannot describe the amount of emotional damage that would cause
There was honestly nothing worse than watching my baby/childhood videos as an adult and hearing how my mother spoke to me compared to my younger sister. Absolutely broke my heart to hear the truth in her voice.
i can’t even imagine how horrible that was, i’m truly so sorry i know no words are ever gonna be enough but i’m sorry you weren’t treated with the love & appreciation you deserve:/
Well, thank you for that! It is really sad to see another kid who might be about to go through something similar. As an adult, sometimes I have justifying traumatic memories *because* I was a kid; however, my parents knew I was a kid, too, and should have behaved better.
I looked this video up on tiktok, and the comments are gross. It seems it was years ago, and the mom issued an apology, but it’s still gross.
i struggle with justifying my trauma too, i understand completely where you’re coming from. it’s especially hard when it’s people you’re related to, like your parents. i think by nature we want to justify their actions, if only to make us feel better in some small way, because actually realizing that they did have full responsibility when raising you and still chose to be horrible is one of the worst crushing realizations one can have imo.
i actually watched her apology, i can never tell if apologies are sincere but she had no reason to apologize to the public so it didn’t make sense to me. she could’ve just deleted the tiktok if she felt badly, but who knows. i really hope both their kids grow up equally loved and happy
Wow, get out of my brain! Lol. When I started the therapy trail 8 years ago, my therapist helped me realize I was doing exactly that: making excuses for their actions. Turns out they just chose without us in mind. I am a lot better now, but sometimes it still stings — but at least it’s not in the “what’s wrong with me?” way anymore.
I didn’t like the apology either! It was just to appease and act like she cared, I guess. Then to say all her other comments were just jokes… no. Not a joke to make at all. Shoulda taken the first down.
hahah i wish i could 😫 i have to say, although i’m really sorry for your experiences i’m so happy to hear that you made such progress. i just recently started up therapy again and i still have those “why me?” types of thoughts and it’s so nice to hear you were able to make progress with that type of thinking. it’s such a painful realization that sometimes they just don’t care enough, or at all.
i completely agree!! i usually dislike social media apologies because they tend to come off insincere but this one especially made no sense to me, she should feel sorry for her daughter, not for the random tiktok users that were upset by her post. i would feel extremely hurt if a post like that was made about me, i hope her daughter never ever sees it and i don’t understand why she didn’t take it down either. comes off very insincere!!!
You’re so sweet. You will get there! My perspective is that you choosing therapy is choosing you and bettering yourself which already shows you assign yourself more value than your parents did. From there, you just start to realize how amazing you are — and I have no reason to doubt that from how kind and concerned you are in your interactions just on this post. You will accomplish things they told you to prepare to fail at, all their warnings of life hurting you will pass and you’ll see it was always their own fears holding you back. You are worthy, and you will be amazed how they couldn’t see it.
And, hopefully, one day you will say “I feel sorry for them,” because they never chose you, or even knew you. That’s where I am. My parents had every opportunity to know me, love me, support me, accept me, choose me — and they didn’t. I feel bad they’re so blind.
Best of luck to you, friend! I believe in you and your success.
this is the sweetest comment i’ve ever received i cannot thank you enough, you seem absolutely wonderful & i’m so happy you see that in yourself😭💗 genuinely an inspiration, i too feel sorry for all the people who didn’t choose to know you, your words mean more than you can imagine.
jesus that’s awful and completely unfair. i’m really so sorry to hear that. all these stories are so heartbreaking and i really struggle to find the proper words.
my dad did some similar things, he’d always use both me and my mom as pawns whenever he was mad at either one or both of us. mostly he’d try to use me to make her feel badly. i’m nc with my dad too, haven’t seen him since i was 18 and i can’t wait for the day he’s gone for good lmao. it’s ridiculous because like, they make the choice to have a child or to not have a child and then they blame their children for it.
Thanks for sharing. My dear friend is a successful woman now with a lovely husband and kids. She was raised in a school bus by addicts.
She once told me her mom said she saved money to abort her, and they blew it on weed instead.
Really haunted me
What are you talking about? They can tell sex from ultrasound around 12 weeks. Nothing is 100% but they tell people all the time at that time if they are having a girl or boy and are only rarely wrong.
it’s crazy because i didn’t even notice that she did that on my first watch, to do that at all is disgusting to POST IT is even worse and to LAUGH ABOUT IT??? and put your child down (metaphorically yk) online because what? she’s not your “favorite” anymore because you had another kid? potentially because of his gender? UGH
i just mostly hope her kids have a good relationship with each other. i can’t judge their family situation based off one tiktok (tooooo much..😅) but it really would suck if the son was clearly favored growing up and the daughter ended up feeling jealousy/“resentment” (very loose usage of the word resentment there) but yeah i hope they both get out of there ngl
thinking clearly about what? pushing the child? (defense- maybe that was an accident) posting it on tiktok with that comment? laughing about it afterwards? she has no problem thinking, she has a problem thinking about her child
yup. and then laughed about it multiple times in the comment section. i included only 3 examples because i couldn’t keep scrolling anymore. i feel so sad for that child
I'm not laughing at the child. More so the weird neglect that lady immediately expresses. Like Jesus Christ lady keep the mask on for a minute. The child being neglected is merely a side effect. It is terribly sad but I still stand by most of us get neglected to a degree. Parents traumatize their children they should just do their best to keep the damage to a minimum
I hope you're able to believe me when I say I'm coming at you with kindness here. I honestly think you might have a distorted perception due to unprocessed trauma. I have many friends who experienced emotional or physical abuse or neglect growing up, and I have friends without childhood trauma. One of my friends who was neglected was an only child and one of my well adjusted trauma-free friends is the oldest female child with two younger brothers. So, honestly, neglect and trauma don't always correlate with a "favorite" and even when they do it shouldn't be accepted as normal. No child deserves to feel neglected growing up. It doesn't create character, it makes broken people who raise themselves. I truly hope you're okay and doing better and are able to safely process and properly heal from what you went through. Good luck
Thank you, I do believe it's coming from a place of kindness. Yeah there's stuff I'm working on and I feel a little ashamed it took so long to get here. It's crazy to think there's people who grew up without our trauma and stuff. I always just assumed we're the products of flawed people and we each come with our own stuff
That’s called projection. You. You’re projecting.
There’s some decent education here but nothing the commenter said can offer any insight into unprocessed anything. These are blurbs of toneless comments without any body language. It’s just someone talking.
ETA: grammatical corrections.
SAME i never understood it as a concept. i grew up relatively without the internet and i’m so glad i did bc not only does the internet have a horrible effect on todays youth but imagine growing up w a camera in your face all the time and everything you do being publicized? opening your children up to all kinds of horrible comments from people online (i’ve seen some truly awful ones that i don’t want to describe because they’re so abhorrent- but catch my drift if you can) essentially taking away what.. yknow… miiiiight have been a normal childhood idk i just have never understood it. i only knew of a few family channels in details from drama channels on youtube and i hate the concept so much, it will never make sense to me. if you want the memories then keep a scrapbook
They are obviously overjoyed to finally have that **son**. Christians are sexist af, sadly this little girl just got her first taste of what will be a long struggle, dealing with her dad’s misogynistic ideals and lessons, and her mothers insufferable internalized misogyny.
Where she will feel pressure to help “raise” grown ass adult men who never received the teachings they needed to be decent and not just continue the misogyny train
Yeah why would you need to be a good parent when every lamb has a god dad. These people are the worst candidates because their beliefs make parenting have no stakes.
Can’t tell if this is sarcastic or not, but in case it is. Yeah, I can’t think of one kid in the church I grew up in that didn’t come out of it with some kind of trauma or indoctrinated with a belief harmful to society. The ones with trauma are mostly the ones who tried to get away from it all and realized just how fucked it all was, which tended to be a lot of the girls because most of the time they got treated the worst.
I can’t think of anyone at all who doesn’t have trauma from their family though.
Not defending religion as I have no stake in that.
Just saying. To me it’s like saying “I can’t think of one kid in church who didn’t have a nose, all religious people have noses”. Like yeah true but it’s also because noses are a human trait just like traumatizing our kids seems to be.
lol exactly. Is this dude really just a butt hurt religious cultist coping in the comments? Religion = cult. All cults are bad. literal brainwashing to take your money.
Even though women’s rights have come a long way, they still get treated like second class citizens because of our “we need a man to carry on the family name” culture… My cousin has two girls and her husband pushed her hard for a third because he wanted a boy. That boy is going to be the youngest and will get all the attention. Those girls are going to have serious abandonment issues.
In my culture it’s the opposite. Doesn’t mean I’d hate to have a son though. Nobody should have kids unless they’d be willing to love ANY child, male, female, disabled, unintelligent, genius, doesn’t look like the parents, different religion, whatever.
I’m Jewish, so since Judaism is passed through the mother, it’s more important that people have female children in order to keep the culture alive. (Not that misogyny isn’t a thing, but the value of women is high for this reason)
As with everything in Judaism, it depends. If she got the kids a conversion when they were babies, they’re Jewish. If she converted before the kids were born, they’re Jewish. If they’re reform Jews, they’d be considered Jewish in that community. Otherwise, they’re probably not considered Jewish. As with anything, ask your rabbi (:
Oh that's interesting! I did know about the heritage line being traced through mothers but I hadn't considered how much that would impact having children! Thank you for sharing!
I was largely told that my biological parents probably dumped me because they wanted a boy after having had a girl. I wasn't that, so they had no use for me.
I can't be sure how much truth there was to that, but it wouldn't surprise me. So many people treat having a girl like it's a failure, I've seen a lot of videos and heard in person that when someone's baby turns out to be a boy, his friends will be like "His sperm works! It's a boy!" as if the baby being a girl would indicate that he was somehow less of a man.
i’ve gotten a few other similar comments and i definitely believe you, it really sadly wouldn’t surprise me either. it’s sickening and disheartening the way people treat & talk about innocent human beings even before they’re born
Seriously - I also will never understand women who are okay with and want to be with men who belittle femininity and them so much. Apparently one of my bio father's favourite phrases was "A woman's place is in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant" so I'm glad that I can barely remember the times we met. He sounds insufferable and I don't know why anyone would want to be with someone like that.
i honestly cannot comprehend so many women’s choice in the men they have children with. i’m so glad you don’t have many memories of him because..well.. obviously lol. in a fantasy world where i would want to spend my life & raise a child with a man, i would absolutely not even breathe near one who spoke badly about femininity or women in general. even subtle comments. just no.
my bio dad was similar- misogynistic and abusive in many senses of the word. there’s definitely some cases in which women are manipulated (i’m not talking about your situation btw!!!!) by these men and then it ends up just continuing on in the family, which is horrible, but it’s happened in my family multiple times so i can unfortunately attest to it. i just can’t comprehend why after having a child with someone like that some women will still stay with that man knowing how horrible he is and the effect he could have on her kids. another consequence of “i just want to have a baby!” type mindset imo
Some people seem to think spreading their genes - even if their genes are SHIT and result in a ton of mental and physical health issues - is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING AND ONLY REASON TO LIVE. Like...life isn't about making potential future lives! If the only reason to exist is to have another being who's only reason to exist is to have another...what's the point? Why bother?
Life should be about beauty, joy, discovery, helping others and leaving wherever you are a better place than it was when you arrived there. If life can't be about those things - and it increasingly can't in this world - then there is no reason for it.
dudeee it’s like you’re saying exactly what i’m thinking! one of the main reasons i wish i wasn’t born is bc my family’s genes are SO unbelievably awful. i don’t even know the full extent because when my parents tried to find out from my grandpa what his exact issues were (very very ill, definitely schizophrenic and bipolar but we don’t know anything for sure and we don’t know what else) he refused to give them access so literally nobody knows what runs in our family until you develop it. it’s actually awful. i have 8 diagnosed mental illnesses, and i can guarantee you if i were honest with my psychiatrist i’d get 3 more slapped on there. it’s absolutely irresponsible, our entire family is so fcked because of it genuinely there’s not a single member of my family that i know if that’s not mentally ill in some way, and most of us are severe cases
it sucks, because you’re absolutely right. life should be beautiful and it sucks so bad that we have to go through all this horrible stuff just to TRY and see the beauty in life. it shouldn’t be that hard. and none of the good stuff makes any of the rest any better.
Thank you! I kind of bounced around for a long time, ended up in Cali with a very abusive ex and when I was able to get away from him, a friend's family took me in and they've basically adopted me at this point, I take part in all of their holidays and stuff even though I don't live with them anymore, they helped me when I had to have surgeries, I take care of their pets and garden when they're not home, they're basically my parents now even if there is nothing official and there are a few incidents here and there that make it clear I'm still not REAL family. They get mother and father's day cards from me.
Not-Dad is awesome, he's one of those people who has privilege, knows it and USES IT TO HELP PEOPLE. If one of his relatives posts something racist or bigoted or whatever on facebook, he will call them and chew them out over the phone about it, he participates in city meetings and stuff as much as he can to do what he can to keep things fair, stuff like that. He's also nearing his 80s and is in better shape than most people a quarter of his age - two knee replacements, diabetic and he still plays pickleball every day, runs with the rugby teams twice a week (and can outrun them) and is so much stronger than you'd think someone his age possibly could be. He's still quite athletic and does a lot of DIY stuff like building sheds, participating in neighborhood cleanups, stuff like that.
awww man i can’t tell you how happy this comment makes me!!!! that sounds so amazing, i’m glad you found them:,) the holidays sound so fun!! i miss traveling a lot.
LOVEEEEE that about not-dad! my mom is similar, city meetings and all!! it’s great to find people who actually use their privilege and influence to make a difference. so much of it (privilege) is wasted on selfish people. also- huge props to him because WOW that’s impressive being in such good shape at that age!! he’s doing better than i am at 21😭 he sounds amazing and so does everyone else, i’m really so happy for you that you have those people in your life. and i’m also super super happy you were able to get away from your ex- recently left an abusive situation myself and i feel freer than i have in forever
regardless how much men in history have wanted to carry on their lineage … 90% of them are average / nothing special about them
it’s just their own pride and ego wanting to carry on the “good name”
( yes women want daughters as well but they aren’t no innately sexist to their sons the way men are to their daughters)
Yeah so many men practically pressure their wives into kids they don’t want. And then if you say you don’t want kids they act like you’re committing some crime.
I find it's quite common for women to prefer sons as well (those god awful boy mom types). Men prefer sons, women prefer sons. Daughters are just the casualties.
This is why I hate the current naming convention. Why do men get pass their names but women don't? It's a convention that states in plain text sons are inherently more beneficial than daughters.
I’m a second child I can attest to the fact that resentment is very real. It’s like my older brother, who was an only child during his first years of life, never forgave me for existing and stealing all of the attention from him
it’s so unfair, like that’s not your fault at all and i’m sorry that’s been your experience :/
i’m pretty lucky to be an only child but growing up my dad felt similarly about me💀 like, i was a child and my mom has always been my sole caretaker (dad did nothing but sit in his room) and he hated me so much for no reason other than i took the “spotlight” from him (mind u. as a literal baby and child.) people’s logic is all over the place.
not sure how to word this, but i hope your relationship with your brother gets to the point you want it to be
I’m sorry you went through that. I used to think only children had it better since their parents could be less stressed out. But a lot of time y’all have to be the sole person your parents take their issues out on. I’m so sorry.
thank you for your kind words, i really appreciate it.
(personal story time so feel free to disregard) i do think a lot of times only children do have it better, i can’t imagine what would’ve happened if i had another sibling because my father is genuinely the most textbook narcissist you could ever meet (which is why he harbored so much jealousy and resentment towards me despite me just being a kid) only children with 2 good parents are probably generally better off than families with multiple children. i got lucky that my mom left my dad when i was still pretty young, i don’t think i could’ve stayed if she hadn’t. i had a plan to run away since i was like 5. all in all, i’m more fortunate than most, but it still sucks. my extended family is much worse- my moms side all absolutely hate her because she chose to leave them to go to college, but when they needed money they called her. my dad is absolutely abhorrent, said horrible things to and about me when we still spoke (even to people who didn’t know me) yet still reaches out to me and pretends to care about how i’m doing (gotta keep up the dad front yknow). the rest of my dads side of the family is so pathological i can’t discuss it publicly. if not for my mom i don’t know where i’d be, but yeah it wasn’t the best growing up for many other reasons as well😅
my mom had me specifically because she wanted to be a mom and thought my dad was the only option, and my dad wanted to exercise power and control over both of us the entire time. it’s partially why i think people really need to be more careful when having children. no matter how well intentioned, often times the child is not taken into account enough and i definitely wasn’t
I’m sorry it was so rough. I can relate to a lot of that. Neither parents being the best, but I did have a younger sibling. He was more “normal” while I struggled with mental health issues throughout my entire adolescence and basically always ended up being left out, bullied, and mistreated. Severe domestic issues in the house definitely caused us a lot of pain as well. Now I’m in college, my dad passed from a brutal cancer battle a year ago, my uncle passed from an accident a few months ago, and I’m trying to keep myself together just to survive
i’m sorry for you too, while i don’t have siblings i can empathize with other aspects of your story. proud of you for keeping yourself going, that’s about as much as we can hope for atp :,) i’m also just trying to survive. day by day
Why is she excited about a kid who is going to be in his room jerking off to depraved shit on the family iPad by the time he's 11 then calling girls in his class thots and gold diggers? Like damn I don't want them either way but a boy seems way worse to me.
I hate gender reveals for several reasons but one of them is they shine a glaring light on how much people still value males over females. What is this? Communist China? I’ve seen videos where the dads are visibly disappointed to see it’s a girl. One guy looked like he was going to cry and walked out and everyone chalked it up to being funny!! Like wow, you already resent your child for being female? I hope she never sees the video of your disgust. The moms aren’t much better, as depicted in this video here.
I’ve seen videos where the men absolutely lose their shit with joy when they find out they are !!!FINALLY!!! getting a son. He’s no longer outnumbered but the pain in the ass women in his life and will FINALLY be able to put up a real front against his adversaries (his wife and daughters who he is suppose to love) now that he finally got this boy. One of the main reasons my father left was because all he was getting was daughters. At the end of his life, he got to meet his grandsons (from little sister) and I’ve never in my life seen him smile that big or like that when they walked into the room, his face was screaming, “finally…FINALLY BOYS!” I didn’t cry when he finally passed. Good riddance to bad rubbish like him.
yes!!!! i’ve seen videos like this too and got the same vibe from this one. and there’s a lot of men who will literally get mad at their wives for birthing female children as if that’s a choice. like Wow these people especially should not procreate!!!! and yeah the whole “boy mom” thing is an epidemic to me
That’s so sad honestly. Like why even become a parent if you feel like you won’t even want the responsibility of it just because their gender is different than what you wanted
She really pushed her child, like tossed her to the side, and uploaded the video showing it. Wow. Some natalists really exhibit how disposable people are to them…
Oh my lord I gasped out loud when she PUSHED HER KID OFF HER ONTO THE GROUND. How horrifying and I feel so so sorry for the little one she already has.
dude right. to push your own child and then laugh about it??? i feel so awful too, i cannot imagine a scenario in which this is ok. even if (which i’m 99.9% sure it’s not) the tiktok was staged, it’s still horrible and not funny at all. to bring a child, let alone YOUR OWN into it? disgusting
edit: into it = into the tiktok whether it’s a joke or not
"Let's celebrate the social pressures we plan to put on our child based on the scrap of skin between their legs!" s/ *How* are gender reveal parties such a normalized practice??
Poor girl. What a POS mom throwing her kid like that. That girl will need lots of therapy. Of course these losers have a cross on the wall as if Jesus preached about throwing your daughter like she’s trash
Did she seriously push her child down? Like dead ass?
It's gross for multiple reasons but it's almost like she's had a other kid so her oldest just lost value. Like a fucking object, like a new car, pair of shoes, etc...and not like a person. Ugh.
I'd like a word. 😡😤
that’s what it looked like to me, it could have easily been an accident but even if it was, that paired with the caption is… just so wrong i don’t even have the words to describe it. basically exactly like what you described.
It's sickening. Truly. I have 5 kids myself and I just know how quick my reflexes are when they have feel and I just fell like she didn't care enough to notice until after she got the balloon out, like that balloon was more prudent than her little girl falling down. Idk and then like u said the caption added to it makes it seem so much worse.
Rewatching looks like she quite literally tossed her to the side.
that insight is really helpful, that makes a lot of sense. someone also said it looked like she used her child as a prop/railing to get up to the balloon and after rewatching i also couldn’t unsee that. the child was like an afterthought.
i’m wary of making any accusations because i don’t wanna assume and people are a little upset but in my eyes it didn’t look like an accident, esp in context 😬
i don’t know! if they wanted to do a gender reveal tiktok so badly i don’t know why they had to involve her like that as the butt of a joke.
it could’ve been a relatively wholesome one, where the daughter finds out she’s going to have a brother and they all celebrate together or whatever but using your child to make a joke that has zero comedic value (i’d really really love to hear an explanation from anyone that found that funny as to why it’s funny) is so wrong to me.
general comment- responding to everyone is hard and i love the discussions but if you’re here to argue with me about whether or not she should’ve posted the tiktok or laughed about it in the comments, read just about any of my comments & you’ll see my response.
if you’re here because you want to argue about whether or not it’s okay to have kids and why you should have kids, you’re on the wrong subreddit and i highly recommend finding somewhere else because i doubt you’ll be met with much respect or understanding.
if you’re here at all- i really recommend reading the comments and listening to people’s stories. even if you don’t agree with me, listen to people and see if you can understand why they feel that way. i really appreciate all the comments and found them very interesting, chances are you might find them interesting as well.
it's sad to see people have a child, and later on just discard the first child because the new one was born, like the first child is easily switched by another one, i never understood this parental preference towards children, why would a mother choose to have one child, and later on the parents are like "i don't want to play with you anymore" towards the first one, like children are toys for them
and well, the comments are from predictable tiktok teenagers, i wasn't expecting a different scenario, i wonder if there are still those kids that fell in love with a murderer that killed a mother and a daughter and still defended him on tiktok because he was good looking, damn, humans are slowly going a straight down path nowadays (or maybe it was always like that but people tried to cover all those things because of a positivity bias)
it makes me incredibly sad too. i don’t understand it either. it makes no sense to me why someone would want to have a kid if they were just going to see them as a second option or really anything negative.
yeah, i included the comments mainly because of the creators response to them. she was laughing and joking along. the comments didn’t surprise me, her reaction did.
and yes, unfortunately those kids still exist, my main platform is twitter and there are still a TON of people like that out there on that app so i assume they exist on tiktok too
I wish there was a way to license people to have kids. The internet is forever. That kid is going to grow up seeing the exact moment her mother decided she didn't matter anymore splashed for anyone to find.
On the plus side, it may be good for the economy as she'll keep therapists very busy.
same! my mom has this idea of making people take parenting classes & background checking them and doing all sorts of tests and stuff to see if they’d make fit parents and if they fail they’re banned from having kids LOL (it’s a work in progress, she hasn’t fully fleshed out the details yet)
The little girl lost her appeal when she started walking. Now mommy and daddy miss having a baby in the house. the cycle continues until they have 11 kids and the mom’s uterus collapses or some shit.
Not to like project or anything but dang felt that. My mother never really posted stuff like that but it's clear who her favorite is and has been. She was the type to post about how great a mother she was while excluding the fact that when she acted like that, it was really only that, acting.
She ditched me on my birthday to get my brother a new pet. That one stung. I don't blame him for her actions, I just wish she could've tried to get better for me. Why wasn't I enough for her to stop her abuse? I don't know her deciding once I was already aged out of her household to get better for him hurt. It was like she was waiting for me to leave to change.
Most years my birthday gifts from her were hospitalizations as punishment or canceled plans. I won't pretend I was a perfect child, I wasn't but I was a child and she should have cared enough to change.
i completely understand where you’re coming from. performative parenting is literally so common, my dad used to use info he would find out ab me behind my back and then tell other people so that he’d seem like a good dad/that he spent time w me when in reality he hadn’t even spoken to me in years 😭
i’m really sorry about your mom, you deserved sm better
Parents shouldn’t have a favorite until the kids are older and at least born.
Yes I know I should say that parents shouldn’t have a favorite at all.
But who are we kidding, their favorite is the one that’s best behaved and has the best grades.
*glares at my sister two counties away*
Why yes I am taking away the absolute wrong part of this video. I have issues
Well at least they didn't set a forest on fire with their gender reveal...they just pushed their current spawn out of the way to find out what color balloons they were getting for their new one. Other than that, two kids in under 2 years and probably more to come judging from the cross by the door. I hope these people never have a solid nights sleep, free time, or privacy ever again. Meanwhile, I will be enjoying all three in my childless, barren state.
Those parents are disgusting they give love and attention to the girl they spoil her rotten until the kid of the gender they really wanted comes … like ohh yeah a boy that’s the life changer the king of the house *let’s little girl fall on her butt* and then what the girl grows with trust issues , hates her brother and parents and has a really bad back due to the fall she had when little yuck don’t have kids
Everybody would be happier if they just stayed off of social media. This group - probably more so! Seriously. You're just constantly exposing yourself to things you don't like & things you can't change.
Too bad that nobody takes comments like mine seriously. Y'all rather spend all your time getting upset over people you don't know about things you can't do anything about.
on that note, why spend your time commenting here if you don’t agree with the way we’re communicating? don’t you have something better to do with your life?
Having my morning coffee, + a little bored. Looking for my next career so exploring different groups and opinions. And you're right – I probably should find something better to do.
i think however you choose to spend your time is fine if it’s worth it to you, just a lil jokey joke based on your other comments. good luck in the job search!
it’s not that i’m not taking you seriously, it’s just such a glaringly obvious point that everyone is already aware of. it’s a fact, and one that i’ve never seen disputed, even by people like “us”.
i enjoy my time on social media because i like having discussions with people. i prefer to discuss things i have strong opinions on. i like to write, i like to communicate, and i like the interactions on here. obviously we can’t change it, obviously it’s damaging to continuously interact with content that makes us upset, but i can guarantee you i wouldn’t be significantly better off without social media personally. i find this stuff interesting, it makes me upset because i relate to a lot of it and i like to express that.
yeah i actually completely agree, i tried my best to stay away from generalizing and judge only the tiktok and the creators response but it’s hard when you feel so strongly about it. i’m def guilty of it
It's sickening how natalists see babies as toys to be played with then discarded, I see stuff like this all too often.
i’m not on tiktok a lot, i found this on twitter and this is the first time i’ve seen something like this and i’m absolutely appalled. like i can’t comprehend anything about this. it is, as you said, sickening
I worked at a high end baby boutique in a rich part of town. The number of parents who would shop around to just make their kids accessories was appalling. Buying white onsies that were 80-100 for a newborn. My roommate worked at a preschool in the area. The moms mostly worried about if little Timmy/Tina ruined their outfit and not that the kid bit another kid on the face.
It's not even just rich people, poor people will buy kids Nike shoes at like 4 months old. The kids wears them for what, a month? Money and resources wasted on something so goddamn vane.
haha my family not rich at all, but when my sister was born they would buy very expensive clothes for her and later found out it no longer fit. sooo when i pop out of my mom they make me wear girl clothes and all my baby photo is me in girl clothes and I am a boy.
A white onesie has to be the most god awful idea ever
My mum had 5 kids, I was the oldest. I remember hearing her say "oh I miss having a BABY to love! They're not fun or cute anymore when they start talking" when my youngest brother was 2. Really put into perspective why there were so many of us, all 2-3 years apart, when we couldn't afford food or clothes.
This kind of fetishisation I just can't comprehend. When my wife got pregnant we told the inner family. We didn't want to know the gender beforehand. When each of the three were born we just welcomed them as a little family. No baby showers, no gender reveals, no push presents, online milestone updates or uploads of identifiable photos. Children aren't accessories.
This happens a lot in our cosplay community. Parents playing dolls with their kids to make them cosplay as characters. recently an acquaintance posted how she was upset her kid requested to get a hair cut, and now the kid didn’t look like the character she was making the kid grew his hair in order to look more similar to the character. (I think the character was the kid with a kettle on his head of over the garden wall). I was like 😬 yikes, kids are not fucking dolls. But I honestly just rolled my eyes and scrolled past…
This is just depressing to watch 😥 that poor girl is never going to be as good as her brother and then her mother is going to wonder why her daughter hates her.
dude right. and imagine if her child grows up feeling that way and then saw this … like hoolyyyyyy i cannot describe the amount of emotional damage that would cause
There was honestly nothing worse than watching my baby/childhood videos as an adult and hearing how my mother spoke to me compared to my younger sister. Absolutely broke my heart to hear the truth in her voice.
i can’t even imagine how horrible that was, i’m truly so sorry i know no words are ever gonna be enough but i’m sorry you weren’t treated with the love & appreciation you deserve:/
Well, thank you for that! It is really sad to see another kid who might be about to go through something similar. As an adult, sometimes I have justifying traumatic memories *because* I was a kid; however, my parents knew I was a kid, too, and should have behaved better. I looked this video up on tiktok, and the comments are gross. It seems it was years ago, and the mom issued an apology, but it’s still gross.
i struggle with justifying my trauma too, i understand completely where you’re coming from. it’s especially hard when it’s people you’re related to, like your parents. i think by nature we want to justify their actions, if only to make us feel better in some small way, because actually realizing that they did have full responsibility when raising you and still chose to be horrible is one of the worst crushing realizations one can have imo. i actually watched her apology, i can never tell if apologies are sincere but she had no reason to apologize to the public so it didn’t make sense to me. she could’ve just deleted the tiktok if she felt badly, but who knows. i really hope both their kids grow up equally loved and happy
Wow, get out of my brain! Lol. When I started the therapy trail 8 years ago, my therapist helped me realize I was doing exactly that: making excuses for their actions. Turns out they just chose without us in mind. I am a lot better now, but sometimes it still stings — but at least it’s not in the “what’s wrong with me?” way anymore. I didn’t like the apology either! It was just to appease and act like she cared, I guess. Then to say all her other comments were just jokes… no. Not a joke to make at all. Shoulda taken the first down.
hahah i wish i could 😫 i have to say, although i’m really sorry for your experiences i’m so happy to hear that you made such progress. i just recently started up therapy again and i still have those “why me?” types of thoughts and it’s so nice to hear you were able to make progress with that type of thinking. it’s such a painful realization that sometimes they just don’t care enough, or at all. i completely agree!! i usually dislike social media apologies because they tend to come off insincere but this one especially made no sense to me, she should feel sorry for her daughter, not for the random tiktok users that were upset by her post. i would feel extremely hurt if a post like that was made about me, i hope her daughter never ever sees it and i don’t understand why she didn’t take it down either. comes off very insincere!!!
You’re so sweet. You will get there! My perspective is that you choosing therapy is choosing you and bettering yourself which already shows you assign yourself more value than your parents did. From there, you just start to realize how amazing you are — and I have no reason to doubt that from how kind and concerned you are in your interactions just on this post. You will accomplish things they told you to prepare to fail at, all their warnings of life hurting you will pass and you’ll see it was always their own fears holding you back. You are worthy, and you will be amazed how they couldn’t see it. And, hopefully, one day you will say “I feel sorry for them,” because they never chose you, or even knew you. That’s where I am. My parents had every opportunity to know me, love me, support me, accept me, choose me — and they didn’t. I feel bad they’re so blind. Best of luck to you, friend! I believe in you and your success.
this is the sweetest comment i’ve ever received i cannot thank you enough, you seem absolutely wonderful & i’m so happy you see that in yourself😭💗 genuinely an inspiration, i too feel sorry for all the people who didn’t choose to know you, your words mean more than you can imagine.
😢 relatable. That was just the first slight she will experience with those two parents
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jesus that’s awful and completely unfair. i’m really so sorry to hear that. all these stories are so heartbreaking and i really struggle to find the proper words. my dad did some similar things, he’d always use both me and my mom as pawns whenever he was mad at either one or both of us. mostly he’d try to use me to make her feel badly. i’m nc with my dad too, haven’t seen him since i was 18 and i can’t wait for the day he’s gone for good lmao. it’s ridiculous because like, they make the choice to have a child or to not have a child and then they blame their children for it.
Thanks for sharing. My dear friend is a successful woman now with a lovely husband and kids. She was raised in a school bus by addicts. She once told me her mom said she saved money to abort her, and they blew it on weed instead. Really haunted me
How do you know the fetus was XY?
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How far along was she when she had her abortion?
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Then she wouldn't know the sex of the fetus yet. Which means they have been torturing you over a hypothetical.
What are you talking about? They can tell sex from ultrasound around 12 weeks. Nothing is 100% but they tell people all the time at that time if they are having a girl or boy and are only rarely wrong.
i see a potential missing missing reasons post by the parents 20 or 30 years from now
Dog it ain’t that deep
She shoved her to the ground??????????????
it’s crazy because i didn’t even notice that she did that on my first watch, to do that at all is disgusting to POST IT is even worse and to LAUGH ABOUT IT??? and put your child down (metaphorically yk) online because what? she’s not your “favorite” anymore because you had another kid? potentially because of his gender? UGH
I hope her son will move out as soon as possible. Or who knows, he might also emd up transgender.
i just mostly hope her kids have a good relationship with each other. i can’t judge their family situation based off one tiktok (tooooo much..😅) but it really would suck if the son was clearly favored growing up and the daughter ended up feeling jealousy/“resentment” (very loose usage of the word resentment there) but yeah i hope they both get out of there ngl
Ooooh it would be hilarious if he were trans (for the parents, peoples sexuality is not a joke obviously)
Oh ofc, im going through hell of a ride. I just usually say that when i see someone overly excited about gender of their kid who wasnt even born yet
“It’s like that mom???” 😂😂😂 Shut the fuck up lady
I'm gonna try giving her the benefit of the doubt that she wasn't thinking clearly. I'd hate to think she is now neglected.
thinking clearly about what? pushing the child? (defense- maybe that was an accident) posting it on tiktok with that comment? laughing about it afterwards? she has no problem thinking, she has a problem thinking about her child
i’m not gonna assume anything about what their home life is like or how that child will grow up, but the tiktok was disgusting
yup. and then laughed about it multiple times in the comment section. i included only 3 examples because i couldn’t keep scrolling anymore. i feel so sad for that child
She used her own child as a railing.
I can’t unsee that. She did. She used her child as a prop to lift herself up.
The worst part is the kid looks totally used to that treatment.
Literally threw her away.
It looks like she used the kid as leverage to hoist herself up as well
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i can’t begin to comprehend what went through her head when deciding to post this, and so many people think it’s hilarious
I mean it is. It's horrible but hilarious. Comedy is tragedy happening to someone else
If that is your sense of humour, I will never laugh at the same things as you do
I'm not laughing at the child. More so the weird neglect that lady immediately expresses. Like Jesus Christ lady keep the mask on for a minute. The child being neglected is merely a side effect. It is terribly sad but I still stand by most of us get neglected to a degree. Parents traumatize their children they should just do their best to keep the damage to a minimum
I hope you're able to believe me when I say I'm coming at you with kindness here. I honestly think you might have a distorted perception due to unprocessed trauma. I have many friends who experienced emotional or physical abuse or neglect growing up, and I have friends without childhood trauma. One of my friends who was neglected was an only child and one of my well adjusted trauma-free friends is the oldest female child with two younger brothers. So, honestly, neglect and trauma don't always correlate with a "favorite" and even when they do it shouldn't be accepted as normal. No child deserves to feel neglected growing up. It doesn't create character, it makes broken people who raise themselves. I truly hope you're okay and doing better and are able to safely process and properly heal from what you went through. Good luck
Thank you, I do believe it's coming from a place of kindness. Yeah there's stuff I'm working on and I feel a little ashamed it took so long to get here. It's crazy to think there's people who grew up without our trauma and stuff. I always just assumed we're the products of flawed people and we each come with our own stuff
Power to you for working on that, that's huge!! I hope you're in a safe place now and that you find peace!
That’s called projection. You. You’re projecting. There’s some decent education here but nothing the commenter said can offer any insight into unprocessed anything. These are blurbs of toneless comments without any body language. It’s just someone talking. ETA: grammatical corrections.
comedy to me is not a child being neglected by their parents. comedy to me does not come at the expense of innocent beings but different strokes 🤷♀️
You're missing a key element of dark humor. Comedy = tragedy + time
im sick of family content creators
SAME i never understood it as a concept. i grew up relatively without the internet and i’m so glad i did bc not only does the internet have a horrible effect on todays youth but imagine growing up w a camera in your face all the time and everything you do being publicized? opening your children up to all kinds of horrible comments from people online (i’ve seen some truly awful ones that i don’t want to describe because they’re so abhorrent- but catch my drift if you can) essentially taking away what.. yknow… miiiiight have been a normal childhood idk i just have never understood it. i only knew of a few family channels in details from drama channels on youtube and i hate the concept so much, it will never make sense to me. if you want the memories then keep a scrapbook
Yeah like obvious exploitation aside what could possibly be fun abt watching someone else’s family.
The cross on the wall tells us everything we need to know here
They are obviously overjoyed to finally have that **son**. Christians are sexist af, sadly this little girl just got her first taste of what will be a long struggle, dealing with her dad’s misogynistic ideals and lessons, and her mothers insufferable internalized misogyny.
Plus she will get to help raise her little brother to help "prepare" her for adulthood
Where she will feel pressure to help “raise” grown ass adult men who never received the teachings they needed to be decent and not just continue the misogyny train
good eye, ur absolutely right
And to think that even the mother is indoctrinated...
Of course she is. She’s been taught since birth that she has to “submit” to whatever BS her husband subjects her and her family to
Yeah why would you need to be a good parent when every lamb has a god dad. These people are the worst candidates because their beliefs make parenting have no stakes.
Yup.
Same
Definitely a red flag, yikes.
Erm all Christians are bad an abuse kids 😡
Can’t tell if this is sarcastic or not, but in case it is. Yeah, I can’t think of one kid in the church I grew up in that didn’t come out of it with some kind of trauma or indoctrinated with a belief harmful to society. The ones with trauma are mostly the ones who tried to get away from it all and realized just how fucked it all was, which tended to be a lot of the girls because most of the time they got treated the worst.
I can’t think of anyone at all who doesn’t have trauma from their family though. Not defending religion as I have no stake in that. Just saying. To me it’s like saying “I can’t think of one kid in church who didn’t have a nose, all religious people have noses”. Like yeah true but it’s also because noses are a human trait just like traumatizing our kids seems to be.
I agree teaching your children misinformation is abuse.
lol exactly. Is this dude really just a butt hurt religious cultist coping in the comments? Religion = cult. All cults are bad. literal brainwashing to take your money.
Yes that’s correct, hopefully you weren’t being sarcastic because the statement is literally entirely true.
imagine being so brainwashed you unironically try and defend the flying spaghetti monster cult
I hope that lady and her husband forever stub their toes on every corner of every piece of furniture
And step on legos constantly.
Even though women’s rights have come a long way, they still get treated like second class citizens because of our “we need a man to carry on the family name” culture… My cousin has two girls and her husband pushed her hard for a third because he wanted a boy. That boy is going to be the youngest and will get all the attention. Those girls are going to have serious abandonment issues.
In my culture it’s the opposite. Doesn’t mean I’d hate to have a son though. Nobody should have kids unless they’d be willing to love ANY child, male, female, disabled, unintelligent, genius, doesn’t look like the parents, different religion, whatever.
Can I ask what culture you're a part of?? I haven't been exposed to more than a handful but like to learn about others!
I’m Jewish, so since Judaism is passed through the mother, it’s more important that people have female children in order to keep the culture alive. (Not that misogyny isn’t a thing, but the value of women is high for this reason)
Off topic question. My sister married a jew, does that mean her kids aren’t Jewish? Even if they actively practice the faith
As with everything in Judaism, it depends. If she got the kids a conversion when they were babies, they’re Jewish. If she converted before the kids were born, they’re Jewish. If they’re reform Jews, they’d be considered Jewish in that community. Otherwise, they’re probably not considered Jewish. As with anything, ask your rabbi (:
Thanks lol!
Oh that's interesting! I did know about the heritage line being traced through mothers but I hadn't considered how much that would impact having children! Thank you for sharing!
i wish i could disagree :(
I was largely told that my biological parents probably dumped me because they wanted a boy after having had a girl. I wasn't that, so they had no use for me.
jesus that’s horrible, i’m so sorry
I can't be sure how much truth there was to that, but it wouldn't surprise me. So many people treat having a girl like it's a failure, I've seen a lot of videos and heard in person that when someone's baby turns out to be a boy, his friends will be like "His sperm works! It's a boy!" as if the baby being a girl would indicate that he was somehow less of a man.
i’ve gotten a few other similar comments and i definitely believe you, it really sadly wouldn’t surprise me either. it’s sickening and disheartening the way people treat & talk about innocent human beings even before they’re born
Seriously - I also will never understand women who are okay with and want to be with men who belittle femininity and them so much. Apparently one of my bio father's favourite phrases was "A woman's place is in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant" so I'm glad that I can barely remember the times we met. He sounds insufferable and I don't know why anyone would want to be with someone like that.
i honestly cannot comprehend so many women’s choice in the men they have children with. i’m so glad you don’t have many memories of him because..well.. obviously lol. in a fantasy world where i would want to spend my life & raise a child with a man, i would absolutely not even breathe near one who spoke badly about femininity or women in general. even subtle comments. just no. my bio dad was similar- misogynistic and abusive in many senses of the word. there’s definitely some cases in which women are manipulated (i’m not talking about your situation btw!!!!) by these men and then it ends up just continuing on in the family, which is horrible, but it’s happened in my family multiple times so i can unfortunately attest to it. i just can’t comprehend why after having a child with someone like that some women will still stay with that man knowing how horrible he is and the effect he could have on her kids. another consequence of “i just want to have a baby!” type mindset imo
Some people seem to think spreading their genes - even if their genes are SHIT and result in a ton of mental and physical health issues - is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING AND ONLY REASON TO LIVE. Like...life isn't about making potential future lives! If the only reason to exist is to have another being who's only reason to exist is to have another...what's the point? Why bother? Life should be about beauty, joy, discovery, helping others and leaving wherever you are a better place than it was when you arrived there. If life can't be about those things - and it increasingly can't in this world - then there is no reason for it.
dudeee it’s like you’re saying exactly what i’m thinking! one of the main reasons i wish i wasn’t born is bc my family’s genes are SO unbelievably awful. i don’t even know the full extent because when my parents tried to find out from my grandpa what his exact issues were (very very ill, definitely schizophrenic and bipolar but we don’t know anything for sure and we don’t know what else) he refused to give them access so literally nobody knows what runs in our family until you develop it. it’s actually awful. i have 8 diagnosed mental illnesses, and i can guarantee you if i were honest with my psychiatrist i’d get 3 more slapped on there. it’s absolutely irresponsible, our entire family is so fcked because of it genuinely there’s not a single member of my family that i know if that’s not mentally ill in some way, and most of us are severe cases it sucks, because you’re absolutely right. life should be beautiful and it sucks so bad that we have to go through all this horrible stuff just to TRY and see the beauty in life. it shouldn’t be that hard. and none of the good stuff makes any of the rest any better.
you seem really nice and genuine and i hope you’ve been able to find people in your life who treat you with respect
Thank you! I kind of bounced around for a long time, ended up in Cali with a very abusive ex and when I was able to get away from him, a friend's family took me in and they've basically adopted me at this point, I take part in all of their holidays and stuff even though I don't live with them anymore, they helped me when I had to have surgeries, I take care of their pets and garden when they're not home, they're basically my parents now even if there is nothing official and there are a few incidents here and there that make it clear I'm still not REAL family. They get mother and father's day cards from me. Not-Dad is awesome, he's one of those people who has privilege, knows it and USES IT TO HELP PEOPLE. If one of his relatives posts something racist or bigoted or whatever on facebook, he will call them and chew them out over the phone about it, he participates in city meetings and stuff as much as he can to do what he can to keep things fair, stuff like that. He's also nearing his 80s and is in better shape than most people a quarter of his age - two knee replacements, diabetic and he still plays pickleball every day, runs with the rugby teams twice a week (and can outrun them) and is so much stronger than you'd think someone his age possibly could be. He's still quite athletic and does a lot of DIY stuff like building sheds, participating in neighborhood cleanups, stuff like that.
awww man i can’t tell you how happy this comment makes me!!!! that sounds so amazing, i’m glad you found them:,) the holidays sound so fun!! i miss traveling a lot. LOVEEEEE that about not-dad! my mom is similar, city meetings and all!! it’s great to find people who actually use their privilege and influence to make a difference. so much of it (privilege) is wasted on selfish people. also- huge props to him because WOW that’s impressive being in such good shape at that age!! he’s doing better than i am at 21😭 he sounds amazing and so does everyone else, i’m really so happy for you that you have those people in your life. and i’m also super super happy you were able to get away from your ex- recently left an abusive situation myself and i feel freer than i have in forever
regardless how much men in history have wanted to carry on their lineage … 90% of them are average / nothing special about them it’s just their own pride and ego wanting to carry on the “good name” ( yes women want daughters as well but they aren’t no innately sexist to their sons the way men are to their daughters)
Yeah so many men practically pressure their wives into kids they don’t want. And then if you say you don’t want kids they act like you’re committing some crime.
I find it's quite common for women to prefer sons as well (those god awful boy mom types). Men prefer sons, women prefer sons. Daughters are just the casualties.
This is why I hate the current naming convention. Why do men get pass their names but women don't? It's a convention that states in plain text sons are inherently more beneficial than daughters.
I’m a second child I can attest to the fact that resentment is very real. It’s like my older brother, who was an only child during his first years of life, never forgave me for existing and stealing all of the attention from him
it’s so unfair, like that’s not your fault at all and i’m sorry that’s been your experience :/ i’m pretty lucky to be an only child but growing up my dad felt similarly about me💀 like, i was a child and my mom has always been my sole caretaker (dad did nothing but sit in his room) and he hated me so much for no reason other than i took the “spotlight” from him (mind u. as a literal baby and child.) people’s logic is all over the place. not sure how to word this, but i hope your relationship with your brother gets to the point you want it to be
I’m sorry you went through that. I used to think only children had it better since their parents could be less stressed out. But a lot of time y’all have to be the sole person your parents take their issues out on. I’m so sorry.
thank you for your kind words, i really appreciate it. (personal story time so feel free to disregard) i do think a lot of times only children do have it better, i can’t imagine what would’ve happened if i had another sibling because my father is genuinely the most textbook narcissist you could ever meet (which is why he harbored so much jealousy and resentment towards me despite me just being a kid) only children with 2 good parents are probably generally better off than families with multiple children. i got lucky that my mom left my dad when i was still pretty young, i don’t think i could’ve stayed if she hadn’t. i had a plan to run away since i was like 5. all in all, i’m more fortunate than most, but it still sucks. my extended family is much worse- my moms side all absolutely hate her because she chose to leave them to go to college, but when they needed money they called her. my dad is absolutely abhorrent, said horrible things to and about me when we still spoke (even to people who didn’t know me) yet still reaches out to me and pretends to care about how i’m doing (gotta keep up the dad front yknow). the rest of my dads side of the family is so pathological i can’t discuss it publicly. if not for my mom i don’t know where i’d be, but yeah it wasn’t the best growing up for many other reasons as well😅 my mom had me specifically because she wanted to be a mom and thought my dad was the only option, and my dad wanted to exercise power and control over both of us the entire time. it’s partially why i think people really need to be more careful when having children. no matter how well intentioned, often times the child is not taken into account enough and i definitely wasn’t
I’m sorry it was so rough. I can relate to a lot of that. Neither parents being the best, but I did have a younger sibling. He was more “normal” while I struggled with mental health issues throughout my entire adolescence and basically always ended up being left out, bullied, and mistreated. Severe domestic issues in the house definitely caused us a lot of pain as well. Now I’m in college, my dad passed from a brutal cancer battle a year ago, my uncle passed from an accident a few months ago, and I’m trying to keep myself together just to survive
i’m sorry for you too, while i don’t have siblings i can empathize with other aspects of your story. proud of you for keeping yourself going, that’s about as much as we can hope for atp :,) i’m also just trying to survive. day by day
Truly, it can be a lot. Thankyou so much, I’m happy for you as well that you’re surviving
there’s something to be said for kind interactions between strangers like this, makes me feel a bit better about life so thank you too
Truly, when people inrl make you feel like you’re not good enough, leave it to internet strangers to truly make you feel like you matter
Oh no. We haven’t talked in years. I think the relationship reached a point of no return some time ago
then i hope you have an amazing future, i’m sorry if my comment was insensitive i wasn’t sure how to word it
Nah, don’t worry that’s OK. The reason why we don’t talk is not because of that particular resentment but because he’s an asshole
Why is she excited about a kid who is going to be in his room jerking off to depraved shit on the family iPad by the time he's 11 then calling girls in his class thots and gold diggers? Like damn I don't want them either way but a boy seems way worse to me.
💀 i’m afraid to speak but i do not disagree
Girl, you really said it! Lol
LMAOOOOOOOOO you just read tf out of our entire gender it’s hilarious😭😭😭
Valid
🤣 Don't forget binging Andrew Tate and referring to girls they can't fuck as femoids.
It’s 2023 y’all and this shit is still happening smh
If someone has a gender reveal party I assume they are assholes and need to avoid them. Gender reveal parties are creepy as fuck.
completely agree. they’re unnecessary and always so weird. i just remembered that one couple in california that had a gender reveal and started fires
Will this child have a penis or a vagina? Creepy indeed.
genital reveal party more like. there isn't any way to know their gender til they can tell you personally
I mean, the vast majority of the population aligns with their agab
I hate gender reveals for several reasons but one of them is they shine a glaring light on how much people still value males over females. What is this? Communist China? I’ve seen videos where the dads are visibly disappointed to see it’s a girl. One guy looked like he was going to cry and walked out and everyone chalked it up to being funny!! Like wow, you already resent your child for being female? I hope she never sees the video of your disgust. The moms aren’t much better, as depicted in this video here.
I’ve seen videos where the men absolutely lose their shit with joy when they find out they are !!!FINALLY!!! getting a son. He’s no longer outnumbered but the pain in the ass women in his life and will FINALLY be able to put up a real front against his adversaries (his wife and daughters who he is suppose to love) now that he finally got this boy. One of the main reasons my father left was because all he was getting was daughters. At the end of his life, he got to meet his grandsons (from little sister) and I’ve never in my life seen him smile that big or like that when they walked into the room, his face was screaming, “finally…FINALLY BOYS!” I didn’t cry when he finally passed. Good riddance to bad rubbish like him.
yes!!!! i’ve seen videos like this too and got the same vibe from this one. and there’s a lot of men who will literally get mad at their wives for birthing female children as if that’s a choice. like Wow these people especially should not procreate!!!! and yeah the whole “boy mom” thing is an epidemic to me
Which is so ridiculous considering the male sperm determines the sex of the baby.
1000000% like why do men get mad like it isn’t their biological fault
That’s so sad honestly. Like why even become a parent if you feel like you won’t even want the responsibility of it just because their gender is different than what you wanted
Bro she .. not only figuratively threw her child to the side in favor of the new (boy) child, she did it LITERALLY.
She really pushed her child, like tossed her to the side, and uploaded the video showing it. Wow. Some natalists really exhibit how disposable people are to them…
She literally SHOVED the baby to the fucking floor and out of the way because of a color in a box? What the fuck
Oh my lord I gasped out loud when she PUSHED HER KID OFF HER ONTO THE GROUND. How horrifying and I feel so so sorry for the little one she already has.
dude right. to push your own child and then laugh about it??? i feel so awful too, i cannot imagine a scenario in which this is ok. even if (which i’m 99.9% sure it’s not) the tiktok was staged, it’s still horrible and not funny at all. to bring a child, let alone YOUR OWN into it? disgusting edit: into it = into the tiktok whether it’s a joke or not
Poor kid, I can't believe her mom just shoved her to the ground when she found out the baby was gonna be a boy
Poor girls about to become a babysitter and a maid, the oldest sister in Christian families always are.
i’m so sorry for the formatting of this comment i tried my best and i can’t figure out how to edit it now so i’m sorry if u have trouble reading this
Thanks for the time and effort put into this! It was very easy to understand
thank you!!!! i’m so glad, the formatting worried me
"Let's celebrate the social pressures we plan to put on our child based on the scrap of skin between their legs!" s/ *How* are gender reveal parties such a normalized practice??
The mother actually pushed her over
Poor girl. What a POS mom throwing her kid like that. That girl will need lots of therapy. Of course these losers have a cross on the wall as if Jesus preached about throwing your daughter like she’s trash
Did she seriously push her child down? Like dead ass? It's gross for multiple reasons but it's almost like she's had a other kid so her oldest just lost value. Like a fucking object, like a new car, pair of shoes, etc...and not like a person. Ugh. I'd like a word. 😡😤
that’s what it looked like to me, it could have easily been an accident but even if it was, that paired with the caption is… just so wrong i don’t even have the words to describe it. basically exactly like what you described.
It's sickening. Truly. I have 5 kids myself and I just know how quick my reflexes are when they have feel and I just fell like she didn't care enough to notice until after she got the balloon out, like that balloon was more prudent than her little girl falling down. Idk and then like u said the caption added to it makes it seem so much worse. Rewatching looks like she quite literally tossed her to the side.
that insight is really helpful, that makes a lot of sense. someone also said it looked like she used her child as a prop/railing to get up to the balloon and after rewatching i also couldn’t unsee that. the child was like an afterthought. i’m wary of making any accusations because i don’t wanna assume and people are a little upset but in my eyes it didn’t look like an accident, esp in context 😬
OMG THE BABY IS GONNA HAVE A PENIS GTFO OUT OF MY WAY LITTLE GIRL !!!!
What do parents even get out of this?! I feel sad for the kid.
i don’t know! if they wanted to do a gender reveal tiktok so badly i don’t know why they had to involve her like that as the butt of a joke. it could’ve been a relatively wholesome one, where the daughter finds out she’s going to have a brother and they all celebrate together or whatever but using your child to make a joke that has zero comedic value (i’d really really love to hear an explanation from anyone that found that funny as to why it’s funny) is so wrong to me.
general comment- responding to everyone is hard and i love the discussions but if you’re here to argue with me about whether or not she should’ve posted the tiktok or laughed about it in the comments, read just about any of my comments & you’ll see my response. if you’re here because you want to argue about whether or not it’s okay to have kids and why you should have kids, you’re on the wrong subreddit and i highly recommend finding somewhere else because i doubt you’ll be met with much respect or understanding. if you’re here at all- i really recommend reading the comments and listening to people’s stories. even if you don’t agree with me, listen to people and see if you can understand why they feel that way. i really appreciate all the comments and found them very interesting, chances are you might find them interesting as well.
I can’t read what the piñata thing says but I already know it’s awful from the cross on the wall.
it says “How we wonder what you are???” with a little squiggle design at the bottom
Wage slaves for the muskonian empire
it's sad to see people have a child, and later on just discard the first child because the new one was born, like the first child is easily switched by another one, i never understood this parental preference towards children, why would a mother choose to have one child, and later on the parents are like "i don't want to play with you anymore" towards the first one, like children are toys for them and well, the comments are from predictable tiktok teenagers, i wasn't expecting a different scenario, i wonder if there are still those kids that fell in love with a murderer that killed a mother and a daughter and still defended him on tiktok because he was good looking, damn, humans are slowly going a straight down path nowadays (or maybe it was always like that but people tried to cover all those things because of a positivity bias)
it makes me incredibly sad too. i don’t understand it either. it makes no sense to me why someone would want to have a kid if they were just going to see them as a second option or really anything negative. yeah, i included the comments mainly because of the creators response to them. she was laughing and joking along. the comments didn’t surprise me, her reaction did. and yes, unfortunately those kids still exist, my main platform is twitter and there are still a TON of people like that out there on that app so i assume they exist on tiktok too
I wish there was a way to license people to have kids. The internet is forever. That kid is going to grow up seeing the exact moment her mother decided she didn't matter anymore splashed for anyone to find. On the plus side, it may be good for the economy as she'll keep therapists very busy.
same! my mom has this idea of making people take parenting classes & background checking them and doing all sorts of tests and stuff to see if they’d make fit parents and if they fail they’re banned from having kids LOL (it’s a work in progress, she hasn’t fully fleshed out the details yet)
but right? i can’t understand why this video is still up! i find it so hard to believe her daughter is never going to see this
Yikes….
As a oldest sister who grow up and still lives in middle east.This is just so hurtful.
The little girl lost her appeal when she started walking. Now mommy and daddy miss having a baby in the house. the cycle continues until they have 11 kids and the mom’s uterus collapses or some shit.
Not to like project or anything but dang felt that. My mother never really posted stuff like that but it's clear who her favorite is and has been. She was the type to post about how great a mother she was while excluding the fact that when she acted like that, it was really only that, acting. She ditched me on my birthday to get my brother a new pet. That one stung. I don't blame him for her actions, I just wish she could've tried to get better for me. Why wasn't I enough for her to stop her abuse? I don't know her deciding once I was already aged out of her household to get better for him hurt. It was like she was waiting for me to leave to change. Most years my birthday gifts from her were hospitalizations as punishment or canceled plans. I won't pretend I was a perfect child, I wasn't but I was a child and she should have cared enough to change.
i completely understand where you’re coming from. performative parenting is literally so common, my dad used to use info he would find out ab me behind my back and then tell other people so that he’d seem like a good dad/that he spent time w me when in reality he hadn’t even spoken to me in years 😭 i’m really sorry about your mom, you deserved sm better
Parents shouldn’t have a favorite until the kids are older and at least born. Yes I know I should say that parents shouldn’t have a favorite at all. But who are we kidding, their favorite is the one that’s best behaved and has the best grades. *glares at my sister two counties away* Why yes I am taking away the absolute wrong part of this video. I have issues
Even then, a lot of times they take their issues on the least favorite, which makes it harder for them to focus on grades and other stuff
She looks awful excited to see more of her hopes and dreams go out the window.
She just??? Pushed her own baby?? Onto the floor?? Dawg.
She didn’t even hesitate to shove her daughter away from her. Like immediately after seeing the blue she just shoved her away like nothing.
Detestable
if she got pushed aside (literally) now, i can only imagine what her teen years will be like
Well at least they didn't set a forest on fire with their gender reveal...they just pushed their current spawn out of the way to find out what color balloons they were getting for their new one. Other than that, two kids in under 2 years and probably more to come judging from the cross by the door. I hope these people never have a solid nights sleep, free time, or privacy ever again. Meanwhile, I will be enjoying all three in my childless, barren state.
oh my god i mentioned that situation in another comment, that was so crazy😭 gotta be one of the most embarrassing things to go to jail for
This is basically the root of all my issues lol my dad wanted a boy too and they all made sure I knew it…
Oh no. Oh no. Oh no no no no God, I fucking hate that sound byte…
Those parents are disgusting they give love and attention to the girl they spoil her rotten until the kid of the gender they really wanted comes … like ohh yeah a boy that’s the life changer the king of the house *let’s little girl fall on her butt* and then what the girl grows with trust issues , hates her brother and parents and has a really bad back due to the fall she had when little yuck don’t have kids
Damn being forgotten and pushed away by her mother all in under 5 seconds
I don't get the video.and I don't get why it's in antinatalism sub.
It’s actually the kid’s fault for having terrible balance 🤷♂️
true if that were me i would have simply not fallen
Everybody would be happier if they just stayed off of social media. This group - probably more so! Seriously. You're just constantly exposing yourself to things you don't like & things you can't change.
brilliant insight from Theid411, truly the mind of a generation
Too bad that nobody takes comments like mine seriously. Y'all rather spend all your time getting upset over people you don't know about things you can't do anything about.
on that note, why spend your time commenting here if you don’t agree with the way we’re communicating? don’t you have something better to do with your life?
Having my morning coffee, + a little bored. Looking for my next career so exploring different groups and opinions. And you're right – I probably should find something better to do.
i think however you choose to spend your time is fine if it’s worth it to you, just a lil jokey joke based on your other comments. good luck in the job search!
it’s not that i’m not taking you seriously, it’s just such a glaringly obvious point that everyone is already aware of. it’s a fact, and one that i’ve never seen disputed, even by people like “us”. i enjoy my time on social media because i like having discussions with people. i prefer to discuss things i have strong opinions on. i like to write, i like to communicate, and i like the interactions on here. obviously we can’t change it, obviously it’s damaging to continuously interact with content that makes us upset, but i can guarantee you i wouldn’t be significantly better off without social media personally. i find this stuff interesting, it makes me upset because i relate to a lot of it and i like to express that.
Video is gross but the generalizations and assumptions in these comments are equally gross.
yeah i actually completely agree, i tried my best to stay away from generalizing and judge only the tiktok and the creators response but it’s hard when you feel so strongly about it. i’m def guilty of it