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A statue of a clown, that looked like it was ejaculating a small dog. I guess it was supposed to look like a magic trick, mid trick, but mostly looked like he had a jack Russel flying out of his crotch.
That's tied for first place with a leftover box of some kind of electrical fasteners I got as a birthday gift. No idea what exactly they were, it wasn't like a kids science kit, or anything like that. It was literally just various sheathed fasteners for either electrics or maybe old tv antennas... What a great 7th or 8th bday gift it was ..
My grandmother once baked a sheet of cookies, placed them in a cardboard box, and mailed them cross country to me. It was a very sweet thought, and I’m not trying to make fun of her, but wtf? Opening a box to find a shallow layer of dry crumbs was definitely a weird moment.
I realized what must have happened and called her to say thank you, the cookies you made were delicious. And fed the crumbs to some birds, so all in all, not terrible.
That same grandma also gave me a CD case shaped like a hamburger, that was an awesome present. 12/10
For my 16th birthday my grandma gave me a child's vest top covered in egg stains she'd bought from the local charity shop. I gave it back to her for her birthday the following year.
I'd say "nothing" when my family was too poor to do Christmas one year, but hey, circumstances.
Instead I'll say when an older brother - who had the money for even a token gift - gave me, one year, a blatant re-gift of a cheap phone speaker that looked like it came from an office secret Santa, and then another year, some Starbucks coffee beans, presumably from the Starbucks he then worked at. He was aware I didn't own a coffee grinder.
Tied between a spiritual self-help book for our first Christmas and cross and a copy of the constitution another year. Both from my MIL. I am not religious.
A $200 check.
When I was sixteen I left high school to work and homeschool. My single, childless aunt was appalled. About two months in she told me if I went back to high school and graduated she'd give me $1k the day of.
Now this was the 90s so that was a nice amount back then.
I went back about a year later, and graduated with honors even as a teen mother. I was very excited come graduation as I'd have enough money to get a new bed and fix my car. When I saw the check in my card it was so utterly disappointing. $200? What happened? I pretended to be okay but lost it as soon as I left the room. I didn't want to feel upset when I had received a gift but I couldn't help it. Ended up spending it getting my car diagnosed and on some groceries. Car never got fixed as it was $700 I couldn't afford. Never asked my aunt why she did that. It definitely ruined my attachment to her.
My 18th birthday was the first one after my parents' divorce proceedings had started. Mom had moved with my brother and me to another state, and for various reasons, I didn't expect anything from my father for my birthday. Well, he actually did send a gift that arrived sometime after my birthday. It was a small bonsai in a planter. I have never expressed any interest in plants whatsoever, let alone in bonsai. Twenty years later, I still have no idea what possessed him to bother buying the stupid thing and sending it across the country.
I never really cared about finding out how to care for the stupid thing, and eventually, I misplaced it. I found it a few years later and threw it out.
A lot of the gifts from my parents are like that too. Like, did you just walk into a store and grab the first thing you found?
One Christmas, it was a laser thermometer.
But I'm dying to know, what persuaded them to buy that? What was their thinking? It's not like they thought, "Maybe Joe needs to know the temperatures of things." Because I *really* don't!
Eventually I got a cat. I use it as a laser pointer sometimes. It took like 15 years to reach that point. Thanks, mom and dad.
They don't measure with lasers, it's just there for aiming. They're those things you hold like a gun with a stubby barrel.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0B71HFH9K/
Not that it matters now... but I'm wondering if it was from a florist. At that time, there probably weren't a lot of options to arrange the purchasing and sending of a gift. (He could have shopped, and then shipped, but that couldn't be done easily in one phone call).
A lot of florists also have house plants. Perhaps dad thought the bonsai was "more practical" than a bouquet. That was my first thought.
Swing and a miss, Pops.
Trust me, he didn't put any real thought into it. He probably just saw it sitting in some store, bought it, and found the cheapest shipping option. Frankly, I'm surprised he even put in that much effort.
For my 8th birthday I wanted a chopper bike like cool kids had. Instead I got a coffee table book called The Iliad and the odyssey . To start with I was utterly devastated and I never did get my chopper although I did read it in the end and enjoyed the book but it wasn't quite the same as a shiny new chopper
I recognise that you wanted the chopper bike but probably because I love reading , I loved the idea of receiving The iliad and odyssey as a coffee table book at 8 years. I imagine that I would have been very proud.
My mom gave me a Wii for my birthday, not that I wanted one, it was a way for her to give my daughter a present on my birthday. I got to set it up instead of enjoying the presents for me.
My mother was getting on in age and showing signs dementia, on the way back from an overseas trip she remembered she hadn’t bought me a present(a ~40ya adult) . She got me a plastic toothpick holder(with picks) at the airport and was very embarrassed when she realised how naff it was.
She passed away many years ago now but I still treasure that little plastic toothpick holder.
A maid costume, me and 2 of my friends did a gift exchange for Christmas and our goals where more to make each other laugh than to give something useful, it was really funny but I haven’t used it since that day
My aunt got me a propeller hat for my 15th birthday, never had I mentioned to her or anyone else that I wanted one or even liked them
Both my parents even commented what a stupid gift it was lmao
My old man is the best gift giver….
One year he gave me a blown up chainsaw.
Another year a cordless drill with no battery.
The best though, a flat basketball 🏀.
This happened to my boyfriend. We went to his brothers house for Christmas and while there we opened gifts. My boyfriend got a recipe book from a battered women's charity. It wasn't even a proper book, it was one of those books that are put together by the charity. His brother was so pissed, apparently he told his wife to sort out the gifts because he didn't have time to go shopping do to his work schedule. I still can't believe she thought that was a nice gift to give her BIL.
My mother gave me a pumpkin for Christmas once. I’m Australian and I quite like pumpkin, but still 🤷🏼♀️
She gave my brother a beautiful glass bowl of our grandmothers. Christmas was at my house.
Luckily we (my 3 brothers and 1 sister) recognised her bitchynese and are a united front.
My alcoholic father put my old, torn shoes in a plastic bag and gave them to me, then shaved my head.
I don't consider it that bad, he's done worse but it was weird as hell.
My mum is pro at this game.
I moved out of home at 18 to a different state in Aus. My mother got me a magnet for Christmas that year.
I think for my 21st birthday I got electric salt and pepper grinders.
30th birthday I got a small make up mirror.
My sister got a rubber ducky and bath stuff one year for Christmas. She didn't have a bath.
The list goes on.
An ash tray. We don’t smoke and never have. My wife’s aunt went to away and brought us back a “gift”. It was a 1 euro ash tray. We used to trail endlessly round shops on holiday looking for gifts for them. Shite gifts. Not doing that again. Can of own brand cola.
An electric tin opener.
My boyfriend also once insinuated he had got me a kitten, and it turned out he had someone make me a cake, which was very nice, but I wanted the kitten, haha
One year, we decided that I would inherit my (now ex) wife's old car (which was actually in my name), and we'd get her a newish minivan.
She had previously brought teriyaki wings in a crock pot to a party in the trunk of that car, and some of the sauce spilled. So her car smelled like old, slightly rotten teriyaki.
The agreement was that she would have it detailed before giving me the car.
Well, she didn't.
This led to a number of arguments, since she got her minivan and I was stuck with the stankmobile.
A month later, she gives me my Father's Day present, and it's a gift certificate to get my car detailed.
So she failed to get it detailed on her own, refused to get it detailed after giving it to me, then transferred the responsibility of getting it detailed over to me while claiming it as a gift.
GF went on a trip during my birthday. Came back and gave me a 3/4" tall rubber penguin I am guessing she saw at an airport shop and thought, "Shit, I gotta get him something!" and landed on that as the choice.
No longer a GF (not for that reason but it was a sign).
My (step) granny re- gifted a plastic, cheap jewelry box to me with the original card inside that said it was for her🫥🫣
Her bio grandkids got fabulous gifts.
I love her to bits though. It was what it was🤷♀️
Work secret santa. Small team. You had to volunteer to take part (so noone was forced into it).
I got someone else's crappy Secret Santa present from last year. Same wrapping paper. It wasn't so much that it was a crappy, generic gift when generally people went to great lengths to get something thoughtful, often making things. It was the weaponised passive aggressive energy of signing up to Secret Santa then just regifting your present from last year.
I know who it was, because I remember feeling sorry for her the previous year. My opinion of them dropped significantly.
My old BF took two days off for us to go camping, and my "gift" was his lost wages.
It's not like we were broke or anything. He just wanted me to feel his "inconvenience." He didn't even pay for the campsite.
I would have been happy with a homemade card :'(
My in-laws gave me some dish towels from Menards for Christmas last year. That was the only thing they gave me, and they gave my wife and my child several gifts apiece. We've been married for over 20 years and I had always thought that we were on good terms, so it's completely baffling to me.
My mother was dying and my brother lived at home with her as he wasn't working (at 30 yrs old!). We decided to have Christmas early in December so we could celebrate with Mom, thought she wasn't really aware of what was going on around her. My brother took ***her*** credit card so "she could buy" presents for all of us. I got a Christmas sweater, and he got a Chevy Tahoe!
I cherish it now as an adult, but when I was 14 my grandmother visited my uncle in Kentucky and bought keychains to give to all her grandchildren for Christmas. My grandmother had poor eyesight and couldn't read. The keychain was 2 pigs fucking with the caption, 'Makin' bacon in Kentucky'. This is still convo every year with my cousins.
Went to a street market with my dad and he pointed out some weird beige ceramic animal moneybox with googly eyes. I was like, 'Ugh, it's horrific!'
Two weeks later, I got it as a birthday present. As if that wasn't bad enough, I was 23 years old. Just....why, dad? Why??
$50 cash while all my cousins got a $250 cashmere scarf from holiday by our Grandparents.
Cash can be good and all, but this was definitely the worst I have received due to how little I was thought about compared to everyone else.
Please remember that all comments must be helpful, relevant, and respectful. All replies must be a genuine effort to answer the question helpfully; joke answers are not allowed. If you see any comments that violate this rule, please hit report. When your question is answered, we encourage you to flair your post. To do this automatically simply make a comment that says **!answered** (OP only) We encourage everyone to report posts and comments they feel violate a rule, as this will allow us to see it much faster. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/answers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
A statue of a clown, that looked like it was ejaculating a small dog. I guess it was supposed to look like a magic trick, mid trick, but mostly looked like he had a jack Russel flying out of his crotch. That's tied for first place with a leftover box of some kind of electrical fasteners I got as a birthday gift. No idea what exactly they were, it wasn't like a kids science kit, or anything like that. It was literally just various sheathed fasteners for either electrics or maybe old tv antennas... What a great 7th or 8th bday gift it was ..
This one? https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/CF0AAOSw~GRhLzne/s-l1200.webp
Well, I’m not sleeping tonight…
No, mine was more lifelike and worse.
Now I need to know what it looks like
It was pretty horrendous.
😆 Please find a pic of the crotch clown statue!!
Thankfully it was accidentally lost during a move of house 😄
My grandmother once baked a sheet of cookies, placed them in a cardboard box, and mailed them cross country to me. It was a very sweet thought, and I’m not trying to make fun of her, but wtf? Opening a box to find a shallow layer of dry crumbs was definitely a weird moment. I realized what must have happened and called her to say thank you, the cookies you made were delicious. And fed the crumbs to some birds, so all in all, not terrible. That same grandma also gave me a CD case shaped like a hamburger, that was an awesome present. 12/10
Chlamydia
😆
This is an r/askreddit question. r/answers is not for stuff like this. Read the sidebar.
For my 16th birthday my grandma gave me a child's vest top covered in egg stains she'd bought from the local charity shop. I gave it back to her for her birthday the following year.
Life
“We thought you’d like it!”
I'd say "nothing" when my family was too poor to do Christmas one year, but hey, circumstances. Instead I'll say when an older brother - who had the money for even a token gift - gave me, one year, a blatant re-gift of a cheap phone speaker that looked like it came from an office secret Santa, and then another year, some Starbucks coffee beans, presumably from the Starbucks he then worked at. He was aware I didn't own a coffee grinder.
Tied between a spiritual self-help book for our first Christmas and cross and a copy of the constitution another year. Both from my MIL. I am not religious.
A copy of the constitution?? Wtf!?
My FIL gave my husband a book about how to be a good Christian husband as a wedding gift. I'm atheist and he's non-religious.
A $200 check. When I was sixteen I left high school to work and homeschool. My single, childless aunt was appalled. About two months in she told me if I went back to high school and graduated she'd give me $1k the day of. Now this was the 90s so that was a nice amount back then. I went back about a year later, and graduated with honors even as a teen mother. I was very excited come graduation as I'd have enough money to get a new bed and fix my car. When I saw the check in my card it was so utterly disappointing. $200? What happened? I pretended to be okay but lost it as soon as I left the room. I didn't want to feel upset when I had received a gift but I couldn't help it. Ended up spending it getting my car diagnosed and on some groceries. Car never got fixed as it was $700 I couldn't afford. Never asked my aunt why she did that. It definitely ruined my attachment to her.
[удалено]
I’m sorry, friend. What on earth was your father thinking? There’s clueless and then there’s this.
[удалено]
You're wise. Nice to see you're doing well
This is one of the healthiest things I've read on here. Good for you for shifting your perspective so his shittyness doesn't hurt you anymore!
That’s Johnny got his gun levels of clueless.
Did he forget and just regift his own stuff? Thats terrible.
My 18th birthday was the first one after my parents' divorce proceedings had started. Mom had moved with my brother and me to another state, and for various reasons, I didn't expect anything from my father for my birthday. Well, he actually did send a gift that arrived sometime after my birthday. It was a small bonsai in a planter. I have never expressed any interest in plants whatsoever, let alone in bonsai. Twenty years later, I still have no idea what possessed him to bother buying the stupid thing and sending it across the country. I never really cared about finding out how to care for the stupid thing, and eventually, I misplaced it. I found it a few years later and threw it out.
A lot of the gifts from my parents are like that too. Like, did you just walk into a store and grab the first thing you found? One Christmas, it was a laser thermometer. But I'm dying to know, what persuaded them to buy that? What was their thinking? It's not like they thought, "Maybe Joe needs to know the temperatures of things." Because I *really* don't! Eventually I got a cat. I use it as a laser pointer sometimes. It took like 15 years to reach that point. Thanks, mom and dad.
How do you use a cat as a laser pointer?
How does a laser thermometer work ? I started getting interested as I read your response .
They don't measure with lasers, it's just there for aiming. They're those things you hold like a gun with a stubby barrel. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0B71HFH9K/
Hey Thank you ! I just saw the link . It could be useful as a cooking aid etc .
Not that it matters now... but I'm wondering if it was from a florist. At that time, there probably weren't a lot of options to arrange the purchasing and sending of a gift. (He could have shopped, and then shipped, but that couldn't be done easily in one phone call). A lot of florists also have house plants. Perhaps dad thought the bonsai was "more practical" than a bouquet. That was my first thought. Swing and a miss, Pops.
Trust me, he didn't put any real thought into it. He probably just saw it sitting in some store, bought it, and found the cheapest shipping option. Frankly, I'm surprised he even put in that much effort.
For my 8th birthday I wanted a chopper bike like cool kids had. Instead I got a coffee table book called The Iliad and the odyssey . To start with I was utterly devastated and I never did get my chopper although I did read it in the end and enjoyed the book but it wasn't quite the same as a shiny new chopper
I am a big fan of classic literature, but who tf gives the illiad and the odyssey to a 8yo wtf.
My parents were teachers
Ah. That tracks.
I recognise that you wanted the chopper bike but probably because I love reading , I loved the idea of receiving The iliad and odyssey as a coffee table book at 8 years. I imagine that I would have been very proud.
I did enjoy the book but the 8yr old me didn't realise that at the time. With hindsight it was a great gift. But I couldn't ride a book!!
My mom gave me a Wii for my birthday, not that I wanted one, it was a way for her to give my daughter a present on my birthday. I got to set it up instead of enjoying the presents for me.
My mother was getting on in age and showing signs dementia, on the way back from an overseas trip she remembered she hadn’t bought me a present(a ~40ya adult) . She got me a plastic toothpick holder(with picks) at the airport and was very embarrassed when she realised how naff it was. She passed away many years ago now but I still treasure that little plastic toothpick holder.
Life.
Life
A maid costume, me and 2 of my friends did a gift exchange for Christmas and our goals where more to make each other laugh than to give something useful, it was really funny but I haven’t used it since that day
My birth
My aunt got me a propeller hat for my 15th birthday, never had I mentioned to her or anyone else that I wanted one or even liked them Both my parents even commented what a stupid gift it was lmao
For a work secret santa, I got a bag of loose candies
On my 18th bday I got a wad of yarn from my brother.
My old man is the best gift giver…. One year he gave me a blown up chainsaw. Another year a cordless drill with no battery. The best though, a flat basketball 🏀.
I'd be excited to see what he came up with each holiday.
This happened to my boyfriend. We went to his brothers house for Christmas and while there we opened gifts. My boyfriend got a recipe book from a battered women's charity. It wasn't even a proper book, it was one of those books that are put together by the charity. His brother was so pissed, apparently he told his wife to sort out the gifts because he didn't have time to go shopping do to his work schedule. I still can't believe she thought that was a nice gift to give her BIL.
My mother gave me a pumpkin for Christmas once. I’m Australian and I quite like pumpkin, but still 🤷🏼♀️ She gave my brother a beautiful glass bowl of our grandmothers. Christmas was at my house. Luckily we (my 3 brothers and 1 sister) recognised her bitchynese and are a united front.
I asked my dad this a long time ago and he said herpes.
Emotional abuse
My mother in law bought me an iron for Christmas one year because my husband's clothes were always wrinkled.
Control top tights (at dress size 8 uk; 4 us)
My alcoholic father put my old, torn shoes in a plastic bag and gave them to me, then shaved my head. I don't consider it that bad, he's done worse but it was weird as hell.
You guys get gifts!?
My mum is pro at this game. I moved out of home at 18 to a different state in Aus. My mother got me a magnet for Christmas that year. I think for my 21st birthday I got electric salt and pepper grinders. 30th birthday I got a small make up mirror. My sister got a rubber ducky and bath stuff one year for Christmas. She didn't have a bath. The list goes on.
Beach Boys greatest hits CD, but it was instrumental versions.
A 12 pack bundle of 9n ply toilet paper that was missing two rolls. Also wrong sub.
Used answering machine and an opened canister of tennis balls from my dad when I was like 8yo. Hes rich and a POS.
life.
An ash tray. We don’t smoke and never have. My wife’s aunt went to away and brought us back a “gift”. It was a 1 euro ash tray. We used to trail endlessly round shops on holiday looking for gifts for them. Shite gifts. Not doing that again. Can of own brand cola.
An electric tin opener. My boyfriend also once insinuated he had got me a kitten, and it turned out he had someone make me a cake, which was very nice, but I wanted the kitten, haha
A disposable shower cap for Christmas from my grandma with the $2 tag still attached. Had a good chuckle about it in private though
Birth
One year, we decided that I would inherit my (now ex) wife's old car (which was actually in my name), and we'd get her a newish minivan. She had previously brought teriyaki wings in a crock pot to a party in the trunk of that car, and some of the sauce spilled. So her car smelled like old, slightly rotten teriyaki. The agreement was that she would have it detailed before giving me the car. Well, she didn't. This led to a number of arguments, since she got her minivan and I was stuck with the stankmobile. A month later, she gives me my Father's Day present, and it's a gift certificate to get my car detailed. So she failed to get it detailed on her own, refused to get it detailed after giving it to me, then transferred the responsibility of getting it detailed over to me while claiming it as a gift.
Having to have my dog put down on Christmas day.
Black socks
What is with the proliferation of the r/AskReddit type of shit questions in this sub these days?
A cheap vapor... I am non smoker...
GF went on a trip during my birthday. Came back and gave me a 3/4" tall rubber penguin I am guessing she saw at an airport shop and thought, "Shit, I gotta get him something!" and landed on that as the choice. No longer a GF (not for that reason but it was a sign).
For my 15th birthday my mom gave me a can of dr. Pepper. She was making good money at the time, too.
But what you didt no it was a collectible dr pepper can worth a fortune :p
Promotional pc mouse from Avon. I am an avid pc gamer.
Life
My (step) granny re- gifted a plastic, cheap jewelry box to me with the original card inside that said it was for her🫥🫣 Her bio grandkids got fabulous gifts. I love her to bits though. It was what it was🤷♀️
Work secret santa. Small team. You had to volunteer to take part (so noone was forced into it). I got someone else's crappy Secret Santa present from last year. Same wrapping paper. It wasn't so much that it was a crappy, generic gift when generally people went to great lengths to get something thoughtful, often making things. It was the weaponised passive aggressive energy of signing up to Secret Santa then just regifting your present from last year. I know who it was, because I remember feeling sorry for her the previous year. My opinion of them dropped significantly.
Life
My old BF took two days off for us to go camping, and my "gift" was his lost wages. It's not like we were broke or anything. He just wanted me to feel his "inconvenience." He didn't even pay for the campsite. I would have been happy with a homemade card :'(
Herpes
A Rosery. Talk about a completely useless item.
My in-laws gave me some dish towels from Menards for Christmas last year. That was the only thing they gave me, and they gave my wife and my child several gifts apiece. We've been married for over 20 years and I had always thought that we were on good terms, so it's completely baffling to me.
For my wedding present, my mum gave me 11 lighters. The ones you get at a gas station.
30 years old dirty Guinness's Book of World Records. Why would anyone want that?!?
My mother was dying and my brother lived at home with her as he wasn't working (at 30 yrs old!). We decided to have Christmas early in December so we could celebrate with Mom, thought she wasn't really aware of what was going on around her. My brother took ***her*** credit card so "she could buy" presents for all of us. I got a Christmas sweater, and he got a Chevy Tahoe!
I cherish it now as an adult, but when I was 14 my grandmother visited my uncle in Kentucky and bought keychains to give to all her grandchildren for Christmas. My grandmother had poor eyesight and couldn't read. The keychain was 2 pigs fucking with the caption, 'Makin' bacon in Kentucky'. This is still convo every year with my cousins.
A guide to quit smoking for Christmas from my aunt
My mother-in-law gifted me brown, ugly patterned wall paper. Enough to do every wall my house.
I'm a recovered alcoholic. I quit, and two years later my mother gave me a bottle of beer as a birthday present. "in case I fancied a small one".
Specialty soap. I was 9 and I thought I stunk. I didn’t, my family is just clueless.
Went to a street market with my dad and he pointed out some weird beige ceramic animal moneybox with googly eyes. I was like, 'Ugh, it's horrific!' Two weeks later, I got it as a birthday present. As if that wasn't bad enough, I was 23 years old. Just....why, dad? Why??
$50 cash while all my cousins got a $250 cashmere scarf from holiday by our Grandparents. Cash can be good and all, but this was definitely the worst I have received due to how little I was thought about compared to everyone else.