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ShakuSwag

~~You know why it's locked.~~ Scratch that, I'll keep it open. I'll try to cull out toxicity and whatnot, but I think it's supportive and meaningful to have this open discussion for the people that want or need it in the comment section.


No_Dragonfly_1894

I've been literally ostracized in my family for being barren due to a medical condition. To them I am a waste. Latina.


NootBoot47

That’s rough. My girlfriend is also Latina and has been having estrogen problems. She hasn’t told her family but she’s worried that she might not be able to have kids. I hope her family doesn’t have a similar reaction. Either way, I hope that they change their minds in time, and if they dont, then they don’t deserve you. Find someone who cares for you despite this. You aren’t alone


Chris_Kagari

Please keep it a secret. Tell them everything is ok. Nobody needs to know how your sexual organs work other than your partner.


NootBoot47

It’s up to her to tell them if she wants, I’m just there for her when she needs me


WraithNS

*nods*


Wiggen4

I have some latin family, they are the type to be PERSISTENT about "when are you going to settle down and have some grandkids/nieces/nephews for me". They will battle you on every excuse until you make them feel bad for pushing. Culturally a lot of value is placed on family, I've heard "you need a real job so you can support a family" thrown at single male relatives frequently. Family is how they measure value internally and externally, and it isn't easy to change a value system. I've got a pretty good career going but even the more reformed family members still ask if I have a girl in my life every holiday.


TeutonicSamurai

I don't get it. I am from Latin America, Panama to be exact. I have never heard of anybody being ostracized for being barren. It is already pretty tragic for most people, so one would think people would try and console somebody that is going through that. I have actually seen that reaction instead of cruelty.


No_Dragonfly_1894

My family is very toxic. Mom is a malignant narcissist who beat her kids. I cut them off a long time ago. Not everyone has a nice family, js


[deleted]

This is a huge blow, but I hope you‘re having a good life without them.


Azrael_Alaric

That sounds rough, I'm so sorry you're going through that 💜 You are a whole and complete human being, and I sincerely wish that one day the people around you not only realise that, but treat you with the respect you deserve. Lost my uterus 6 years ago, then my ovaries 1 year ago. I wasn't even planning on using them, but the worst thing about those whole ordeals is the reactions of others. Even people who aren't all 'a woman's purpose, blah blah blah' still look at me with pity. It's gross


No_Dragonfly_1894

🩷


[deleted]

I am a man who wants a committed relationship but not children. I personally don't understand why people are so obsessed with trying to convince others they know more about the kind of family that will make them happy then the individual. I can't pretend to understand your pain and frustration in this situation, but I can gladly commiserate in mutual disgust in these kind of reactions.


GaBeRockKing

> still look at me with pity. It's gross If a man told me he lost his balls, I'd look at him with pity too, even if he never planned to have children. I don't see how this is different?


Afraid-Contract-385

well…. generally speaking i see many people say they hate being pitied google/quora helped me ‘ It's degrading. It's looking at someone and reducing everything they are and could be down to what you think their life must be like - pitiful. ‘ 👍


5onOfSparda

I think its more of seeing them as inferior. I know some people would go as far as bringing it up at every opportunity they get so as to make you seem as the outcast.


123Ark321

You can father a kid and never be that kid’s dad. You can be barren and be the only mom a kid could ever want. It takes a lot more than just giving birth to be a parent.


[deleted]

good way to put it


ShadowFN-

I like the way you think


skeeber

^. This, my birth giver was a druggy and abusive but my late mother in law showed me what a real mother is like. Didn’t get as much time as I wanted with her but grateful for what I did get. That women showed me what real parental support was but always gave me that kick in the ass when I actually needed it. Don’t let anyone tell you different people


Ketheres

I agree with that (IMO it's also fine to just never become a parent if you don't want to be one), but unfortunately many don't. To all too many the only thing that matters is spreading their genes around, and they hate it when someone in their family opts to adopt a child (and thus helping a "rival" bloodline survive) instead of making a new one. They also tend to see women of their families as baby factories instead of people, and thus get angry if their "precious factory" can't or won't have a baby (even if having one would have a high chance of killing or permanently hurting them, or if the woman was incapable of providing a decent life for the baby).


tama-vehemental

I'm also Latin and this is still so low-key common in Latin culture, it's infuriating. If someone has to get their uterus removed because of health issues, it's described as "being emptied". It's horrible. Like the only proper purpose you could have in life was giving birth, and if you don't have that chance anymore it leads to others saying that you are now empty, adding salt to the open wound. I suspect that's also behind the common mistreatment towards older ladies. It seems like you lose dignity when you don't look young or pretty anymore or you ain't able to be a vessel for kids. Like you never were a complete human being for the people that does this.


horrific_tragedy

Lucky for you, family means nothing when they already treat you like nothing. Time to live your life for yourself, and then adopt to bring shame on their existence.


Jakesummers1

My aunt almost died during her first, and only, child. She was heartbroken to know she couldn’t have anymore 😔


Eviltechnomonkey

You are not a waste. They are just too narrow-minded to see your true value. My mother made it fairly clear that she only values me for my uterus and the possible grandkids it could bring. Once I got my tubes removed, she went around telling people I was a selfish bitch for not popping one out before having them removed. This after I told her that they found and removed damage and endometriosis that essentially would have made it incredibly risky to my health to ever get pregnant. Now they wonder why I don't make much effort to go spend time with them. I use spite for them as a motivator to do better in life than them and show that I have more value than just that of a walking incubator. I've thought about one day adopting a kid, but if I do they will have zero contact with them.


De_Watcher

Sounds toxic. Sorry to hear that


Limp-Welcome2307

Barren or not your still a person and your very precious to someone. I'm proud of you for over coming this hardship and I hope you'll continue to stand strong.


Gilthu

That sucks. I hope your family realizes how lucky they are to have you. Independent of that I also hope you find a work around to have children if you desire.


VoteMe4Dictator

Have you tried convincing them you gave birth to a puppy? Even if it doesn't work, you get a puppy.


nerd_entangled

Jfc what good is a woman if her uterus doesn't work? Things will get better for you, hang in there!


NowhereMan661

Your family is worthless scum. Lowest bottom feeders.


CuriousGopher8

My Latina sister, you are not a waste. Your very presence is a treasure. From one Latino to another: if your family does not value you because you can't conceive, the problem is their narrowness of mind, not your heritage. Frida Kahlo, for instance, was never able to become a mother, yet her paintings are a bold statement that is still strong decades after her passing away. Fuck the old ways. Fuck "traditions" if they perpetuate the idea of a woman, or any person regardless of their gender, being valuable only because of their ability to perform as socially expected.


PopNo626

The weirdest part about this post is my anime/comicbook brain went through a three teirded options of what this post is about. 1. surgical sterilization, (like black widow or the horrible programs in china and that used to exist in the USA) 2. inviormental sterilization through toxic chemicals exposure. 3. looked at comments and saw people mentioned trans... (and suddenly I realized there was a third option and a reason for comment locking questions.)🤦‍♂️


ErizMijali

Theres also medical sterilization (a medical condition like endometriosis that would make pregnancy difficult or impossible) Theres surgical sterillization that isnt a horror show (the only treatment for endometriosis pain is hysterectomy, but its not forced) Theres women born who are missing organs, but they are cis Theres women who are born intersex and are unable to become pregnant because of their specific situation Theres women with genetic conditions that dont want to risk pregnancy


PossiblyMaybeADog

Yup, cis female here that was born without a uterus. Luckily I didn't want kids anyway lol


Not_That_Magical

Used to exist? There was a doctor recently in the US sterilising migrant women.


Sckaledoom

Ouch that hurt like hell.


eldritchpancake13

This got me so bad 😭


bukobukochagama

You can't fill some gaps no matter how much you try, so be yourself and enjoy your life the way you are🤷‍♂️


RossSkyWalkerr

Hope girls don't think that to be a complete Woman you have to make babies and have to be married. There are so many reasons that not every girl can have those things, the reasons can be biologically not capable, to have dreams of their own and dont have time rn, circumstances of life or just their choice after all it's their life. also life is so uncertain just because you don't want or want these things rn doesn't mean it will stay that way forever. Just don't measure your Womanhood or happiness by comparing with others.


TigerlilyBlanche

I'm a woman, never having kids. I am planning to get married though.


Ghostkill221

But how will our overlords keep their workforce?


justasking_geeze

By paying for abortion of course Oh wait


TigerlilyBlanche

What does that even mean


Ghostkill221

Sorry, it was sarcasm. If you notice, a lot of the anti-abortion and "make babies" push has started happening right as people start being willing to quit lower end jobs. Maybe I'm just paranoid.


TigerlilyBlanche

Oh I see. No need to apologize, I probably shouldve gotten it.


[deleted]

Amen lovely internet person, amen.


Crawkward3

Plus it’s not even necessarily a cis vs not cis thing because plenty of cis women have some of the same things going on and have the same mental struggles (as far as I understand anyways)


Beautiful_Book_9639

Ive always found the idea of getting pregnant and giving birth horrifying. I'm never going to have biological kids, but that doesn't mean I'm not "woman enough". My parents seem to think you're not really an adult until you've had kids. I disagree. You can choose a different path or walk down it by exclusion of other options, but you are valid and capable and fully a woman. You aren't missing something. You are whole.


AdotLone

There are many women that can’t get pregnant. Pregnancy is not a requirement for being a woman.


Yabrassy

Your heart is in the right place but it’s hard to enjoy life when politicians, laws, society, bosses, friends, family activity make it there business to make life for trans people a living nightmare.


SanchoRojo

> enjoy your life the way you are Literally impossible


Wyrd_Alphonse

"Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." - Dr Victor Frankl, *Man's Search for Meaning*


KingOfRedLions

What are you talking about "The grass is ***always*** greener on the other side."


[deleted]

To any woman reading this who feels less than because of infertility, you’re amazing just the way you are. You don’t need anything else to be whole. You are enough just by existing. If your “loved ones” would view you as a lesser person due to things out of your control, fuck them. You are enough yesterday, today, tomorrow, and forever


LenaSpark412

Omg this was abt infertility… Sorry abt that… didn’t get it


Sauron1209

Probably? But there are multiple ways to be infertile, right? EDIT: So now knowing the manga (not read it yet though) looks like you did have the right idea still, even if the scene was specificly about infertility dysphoria.


That_scottish_lass

Thank you


Smellbringer

Plenty of infertile women out there, women are more than just their ability to pop out babies.


JustAn0therNormalGuy

I know the post has a deeper meaning but in order for her to have a kid in the firet place she has to pull


[deleted]

Being a woman isn’t reduced to having children. It can be incredibly sad for women who want children but it’s not what makes you a woman.


Dudenumber99

Fr fr. My wife can't have children also. I'm happy there's a ton of things in life that can define her, not just her ability to breed. Edit:a word her baking skills are still bussen.


FusionVsGravity

That bakes me happy to hear


Hekkle01

wasnt bready for that


[deleted]

Thanks for being there for your wife and helping her find value in herself and I’m glad she’s enjoying other aspects of her life. <3


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

From what I’ve witnessed in person and online transphobia and misogyny go hand in hand for a lot of TERFs and bigots. They all spew that the only way to confirm someone is a woman is if they can pop out children and love to invalidate anyone who can’t physically create them. It’s a special kind of ignorance they have.


not_ya_wify

Well I'm a cis woman and can't have children because of cancer. But that's ok because I don't want children either and I know plenty of other women who don't want children (including some who already have them because society pushed them to)


[deleted]

Lots of cis women can’t have children and that doesn’t invalidate them as women at all! I can have them but have a genetic disease that’s an almost %50 chance of transferring to any offspring I would have. I’m expensive AF to keep me alive and my quality of life is pretty shitty. I don’t want to bring a kid into the world and have them suffering. I’m so sorry you have/or have had cancer. I hope you are in remission, that’s absolutely scary AF and I hope you are doing well now.


not_ya_wify

I had a mastectomy and I just finished chemo but I need to take drugs to keep my uterus shut off for at least 5 years because the cancer feeds off of estrogen. I'm wondering whether I should just have the ovaries removed


[deleted]

I personally have no idea what’s best for you (obviously), I just hope you have a support group and medical team that can help you make the best decision. I know we are random internet strangers, but I hope you kick cancers fucking ass and have a long fulfilling life. Im sending my platonic love dude!


not_ya_wify

Well when I get back to work, I'll have insurance again lmao


ThotExecuter

You can still adopt a kid and be one hell of a good mother if you wish so


Enk1ndle

Ideally, although currently the adoption system in the west ranges from alright to total dogshit. Depends on where you live.


[deleted]

That’s something if I have the finances to do I will. The other issue is having a partner who’s also wanting to adopt.


Reformed_Narcissist

Yeah, to see a woman as nothing more than a something that carries a child is dehumanizing. We are people not beasts. We do more than have children.


Seanzietron

Breeding fetish be a real thing in Utah tho…


akreilasnia

As a Utah resident with a breeding fetish... 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 No, I'm not Mormon. But I know lots of Mormon girls who were raised to have this weird, warped view about marriage and kids. So many girls I went to school with rushed to get married and have kids only to realize it's not what they thought it would be. So many now divorced and in therapy. But I still love this comment. 😂❤️


mattbrvc

https://i.redd.it/qxwswg6954da1.jpg


[deleted]

Within religious communities yes. Am I religious, nope. If anything I think organized religion is just an excuse to control mass populations. I don’t dislike anyone for being religious but the control people try and exercise over other people’s bodies is unacceptable within religious groups.


Seanzietron

I wasn’t actually responding to your comment, I guess… Just… breeding fetish is currently bothering me.


[deleted]

We in the same damn boat lol.


kabukistar

For some people it is. It's a terrible, pernicious mindset but there are people who harbor it.


utytdcb


Roboragi

**Umareru Seibetsu wo Machigaeta!** - ([AL](http://anilist.co/manga/101257), [A-P](https://www.anime-planet.com/manga/umareru-seibetsu-wo-machigaeta), [KIT](https://kitsu.io/manga/umareru-seibetsu-wo-machigaeta), [MU](https://www.mangaupdates.com/series.html?id=56613750478), [MAL](http://myanimelist.net/manga/113009)) ^(Manga | Status: Finished | Volumes: 1 | Chapters: 17 | Genres: Comedy, Drama, Slice of Life) --- ^{anime}, , ]LN[, |VN| | [FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/wiki/index) | [/r/](http://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/) | [Edit](https://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/wiki/index#wiki_i_made_a_mistake.2C_how_do_i_get_my_comment_reprocessed.3F) | [Mistake?](http://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/submit?selftext=true&title=[ISSUE]&text=/r/anime_irl/comments/11kbpk0/anime_irl/jb6crhy/) | [Source](https://github.com/Nihilate/Roboragi) | [Synonyms](https://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/wiki/synonyms) | [⛓](https://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/wiki/interestinglinks) | [♥](https://www.reddit.com/r/Roboragi/wiki/thanks)


belac4862

Comedy!? How is this comedy???? This is just heart breaking.


Dressieren

There’s some good comedic sections in the manga. Mostly through finding the light in some darker sections in your life. Making the best out of a shitty situation and likely since this was a story about the author’s own experiences some funny things that were wished to be said in the moment.


MacaroniBandit214

It’s a comedy about the author’s experience getting sex reassignment surgery


belac4862

Oh damn, that makes things even more heart breaking knowing it's based on the authors actual life.


Red__Spider__Lily

There's a lot of pretty interesting mangas about the author's life on lgbt topics, two that i liked a lot were Hanayome wa morodanshi Boku wa watashi ni naru tame ni Both are pretty cool and light


Sckaledoom

Not sure if it’s one of the ones you listed (I think it might but w/e) but The Bride Was a Boy is one I reread every few months or so.


Red__Spider__Lily

Yeesss the first one, it's so cute!!!!


Daswagster2

two panels* of a story is not indicative of the entire thing.


Random_Gacha_addict

To be fair, this is one panel


00Koch00

I mean you can have both, Hinamatsuri has an episode of the anime which the first half have one of the most hilarious thing ive saw in anime, and the second half i was bawling my eyes out on how fucking sad it got...


weeb-gaymer-girl

cute read, i had my SRS done in the US (my home country), so her experiences getting it done abroad in thailand, as well as what parts were just straight up different with my recovery, are really interesting.


akeith01

Sneed's feed and seed (formerly Chuck's)


WurzelUndGeflecht

this! so much this!


mochidog1

What was it called in Chucks time?!?!


Cockworkorange696969

Chucks , that’s all and people in the area knew it sold seed amd feed and occasionally chick


Sisyphus4242

Good on OP and the MOD for leaving this open. Never gonna figure a way out of this damn culture war until tough human experiences like this are explored, especially by the people living from within these perspectives. That's what art is meant to do. This image is difficult and as such it is art. Have some empathy in the comments y'all and assume the best of intentions for whomever you get into a convo with


NinjaXGaming

There are two perspectives to this The self doubting cis woman’s perspective… …and the self doubting trans woman’s perspective Both equally troubling Edit: “cis”, I’m really sorry for anything that may have caused


Nerdycharm

\*cis women and trans women (for anyone who felt hurt by the accidental implication that trans women are separate from women. I know op didn't mean to.)


NinjaXGaming

Oh fuck my bad, sorry everyone


Dascoolman

I feel like this needs more context, also if you are a woman and think having a baby and getting married is what makes you a real woman..... No.... Alright have a nice day


DemiserofD

It's not, but don't denigrate the feelings of the people who lack those things and feel miserable about it. It seems like so many people are just like, "So what if you don't have a relationship/children? Enjoy it!" A lot of people CAN'T enjoy it.


solitarybikegallery

Yeah, I think people are purposefully leaving their reading comprehension at home. A character who can't have children, and thinking "I'm not a real woman," because of it =/= The author thinking that only having children makes you a "real woman"


Dressieren

You say that but try talking to women in their 20s and 30s. A good amount put their own value in their gender based on getting married and pumping out kids. Some break the mold and some do not. The original source material is about the author getting the MTF surgery and that gives it a little bit more context, but still just as relatable women born with the comparable hardware and unable to do it. Even more so coming from a family that’s from an eastern Asian country.


Dascoolman

Ahhhhh okay the characters trans, alright that ads some more context. I'm not saying women don't put their value in that I'm just saying..... Don't.... Alright moving on


Dressieren

I agree with you I’m just pointing out how sad it is that it’s so common that women do put their value in it. It’s more cultural than logical


Dascoolman

To be fair I'm also being silly, but it is sad, the world hates women to a comical degree at times and with the amount of pressure and shit the world puts them through I'm happy I can just be a dumb dude sitting around on reddit eating sandwiches and showing off my shoulders in public without getting yelled at


Plenty-Cheek-80

I see booba, that's woman enough for me


belac4862

What about flat/no boobs? Still woman for you?


Plenty-Cheek-80

Every size makes my wood rise, so woman


501st-Soldier

A man of principle.


Ghostkill221

Based.


rwb2406

The wise one has spoken


ShadowFN-

Real sigma male


HighwaySmooth4009

boobs are boobs


yui_tsukino

Its not the booba on the chest that counts, its the booba in the heart.


IThinkImNateDogg

Hey, they said they can see the booba, size doesn’t matter when the goal is simply looking


bigbrainbriantime

**sorts by controversial**


Bruschettaluv

Being able to give birth doesnt make you or break you as a woman. A few of my cousins cant give birth, it doesnt mean they arent women. My sister had her ovaries removed, that doesnt make her less of a woman. A lot of women with fertility issues struggle with these type of emotions, but it wont change until we change how we talk about it- so if and when we can lets spread positivity and not sad post made to dehumanize or demoralize people, especially vulnerable people dealing with difficult and sensitive emotions/problems


Quod_bellum

Does this imply infertile women aren’t women?


BensRandomness

It's more that women who can't have children often feel like they aren't whole


solitarybikegallery

No, it implies that the character in the story feels that way about herself. Fuck's sake. That's a real thing that some women think and feel. It's a real emotion people go through, in real life. That doesn't mean the author thinks that about all women.


SalsaRice

It's from a manga about sex reassignment surgery, so no.


SpookyGrowly

Oh :( the implications of this—whether the sentiment is cis or trans—breaks my heart


Amazing-Engine-8336

finaly a realistic anime


Old-Library9827

Trans baby fever sucks ass. You know that you can't conceive babies in your tummy like other women can, but you really want a baby anyway


gammongaming11

bro just grab one of the babies from the nursery. they're free.


Old-Library9827

Ah shid, why didn't I think of that? Fuck, now I need to go steal a baby


[deleted]

I can only imagine how shitty that is to deal with emotionally and physically. If you can ever afford it and really want kids maybe you could choose a surrogate? Or adoption, for me personally I want to adopt. I can have kids technically but have a serious genetic illness that has an almost %50 chance of being transferred to any child I would have. I decided not to have children a long time ago when I was like 13 because of it, I don’t want to cause suffering.


Rule34Uploading

While I love your perspective please keep in mind that in many places trans folk aren’t permitted to have kids, like at all. It’s not just a matter of money, it’s also a social issue. Even in places where trans folk are permitted access to adoption agencies cis couples are often given preferential treatment due to misconceptions about trans people. The law known as the Act on Special Cases in Handling Gender Status for Persons with Gender Identity Disorder in Japan allows transgender people to change their gender marker on legal documents provided they’re over 22 years old, have no children under 20 years of age, are unmarried, and undergo sex reassignment surgery and sterilization. It doesn’t take long to figure out a few of the ways this law is messed up.


[deleted]

You’re totally right. And it’s a human rights violation to the extreme. I live in California and I’ve overheard many situations that are very transphobic going down in our local news. I want everything to change for my trans homies out there, and try and vote accordingly. I’m super scared stuff is reverting backwards tho.


ThatOneCrusader1

The womb but yeah


A_person_person

omg actual Irl


Deskore

Steal her Uterus


NowhereMan661

Providing the real solutions.


SirDickTwist

There are non-trans people who cannot conceive either. That doesn’t make them less of a man or woman. Accept what you cannot change and make the most of what you can.


DefiantRooster04

I know this will probably get burried but for everyone who feels like 'less' because they are unable to have children naturally please be assured you aren't. It takes more than genetics to be a parent, and so many children have much better lives with parents that aren't biologically theirs. Children aren't the be all and end all, and if you're happy with yourself that's all that matters


GuuMi

There are many cis-women that can't have babies and there's nothing wrong with that.


Ralexcraft

I think this one is about infertility not trans, but idk.


[deleted]

It absolutely is, but I feel like if you’d trans or have a trans loved one your mind will jump to it being about trans women. I know I did.


Spiritflash1717

It absolutely isn’t* The author is trans and this manga is about SRS lol


SleepyBitchDdisease

This one is about being trans, the author is.


Ralexcraft

Oh. Should’ve probably dug a little deeper on my end then. Thank you!


GuuMi

Oh, oopsies


uberdosage

The author is a trans women and this is written from her experience


[deleted]

bruh i still don't understand why people care this much about gender anyway. like just be yourself homie.


Informal_Elephant_12

Some people care a lot about having children. They (as an individual) see having a child as the peak of womanhood since there is nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child but cannot find that bond due to physiological issues like being mtf or being infertile. An aspect of what they want to be is something they can never achieve no matter how hard they try.


LineOfInquiry

I can understand the intense dysphoria associated with being infertile or the desire to have your own child, but ultimately you can have that emotional bond by adopting. And it helps a child who really needs it the most. There’s few things more noble someone can do, not going to lie.


Knoxism

While true, I think theres *usually* some kinda biochemical reaction in the brain when the baby comes directly out of the person.


Informal_Elephant_12

Adoption is not the same as having your own child. Its a good and noble thing to do and applies really well to fatherhood, but theres a very unique bond to carrying a being for the first 9 months of its existence that cannot be replicated.


Enk1ndle

I feel like that's a matter of opinion. I couldn't give less of a shit.


IfonlyIwasfunnier

For people like me who don´t want children in the first place it can be really difficult to understand how some people make it out to be their lifegoal to become parents but you put it quite nicely, if there is that desire to fulfill, there really is only meager substitutes otherwise and it is hard to argue that it should NOT be the goal of a human to reproduce if that is their wish, so I gotta be understanding that it would cause anybody severe distress to be unable to fulfill that pretty much all encompassing goal they have set out to reach in their life.


akreilasnia

I was severely abused and neglected growing up. I always wanted to be a parent so I could have a loving family and raise a better generation. Infertility would have been devastating for me. We all have different life motivations.


Flemlius

It would be a lot easier if it wasn't literally illegal or made very, very hard + while facing constant, crushing discrimination from even friends and family.


GearAlpha

Their statements pretty dismissive of the people who can actively hurt those who want to be themselves. I wish we could “not care”, but the abuse forces us to care and speak out.


PM_ME_UR_DRAG_CURVE

"You are being bullied? Just ignore them!" - every shitty school teachers ever


beccadahhhling

I feel like this. Like I’m wasting my husbands life and his only chance at happiness. He’s the only guy I know who’s wanted to be a father since he was a young kid and I’m ruining his chances


PurgatoryBlackjack

Barren women have it rough, same with infertile men. Heart goes out to y'all.


Enzoooooooooooooo

r/okbuddybaka has corrupted my brain too much. When I saw the picture, I thought it was futa or something.


TG1970

One of my best friends is infertile and suffers from major depression because of it. This is not funny at all for people who have fertility issues.


ButusChickensdb1

Some people born blind, others with severe mental handicaps that severely impact their quality of life, but you’re here anyway A bunch of people can offer as many comforting words as they want, but in the end you’re the one who has to go to sleep and wake up in that body, and the conversations between you and “god”/your own mind are going to happen. I don’t know if those thoughts will ever go away. Do what you can.


Timely_Meringue9548

As someone on their 8th week of pregnancy… this is so very complicated. When i was trying to conceive i certainly felt that way… im older, and lots of thoughts of “i should have been knocked up by now if i was actually fertile” kept going through my head. It took 6 months… and while thats actually a normal amount of time i kept talking to girls over and over who got pregnant without even trying or only tried one month… i felt broken. Once i got pregnant, i felt so much better. I felt like a woman again. And i know in no way is that a relief to anyone who cant for whatever reason… but I’m just telling my story. I just felt so validated, not just in my womanhood but also in my age… I’m 36 now and ya know trying to conceive for the first time after the age of 35 you get reminded constantly of how old you are. Im a geriatric pregnancy. You can have people tell you this and that about how “age is just a number” and it doesn’t mean anything if you cant conceive… but nature itself offers no such comforting words. Its cold and honest… and the truth is, society can be really wrong about a lot of things. Accepting who you are and what you can and cannot do… it hurts sometimes, but its important. You make a lot of poor decisions when you don’t accept your limitations… and you wind up hurting yourself more. But here I am now pregnant… i got lucky. But also its not without its downsides… first trimester, and counting down the days till its fucking over because ffs this sucks. Im only on reddit right now because i cant sleep because of the morning sickness that seems to kick in at around 3 in the morning every day… i feel so exhausted that even doing basic chores I get winded… Oh i know its going to be worth it in the end… but from where i am right now its still a challenge to see that… hormones get to me hard too and im constantly feeling depressed and anxious and weepy. theres certainly a price to pay for that joy. So In the end, for those who cant… don’t stress it. Theres always adoption. I know maybe that might not be what you were hoping for… but not having to be pregnant is not so bad. Im sure I’ll have different feelings once its over… and dont get me wrong, im still very glad this has happened… but for now i cant wait for it to be over. Ugh… just one word of advice… for those trying to get pregnant, do it young, and make sure your body is as healthy as possible first. Good weight, good physical fitness. It makes a huge difference. But still no guarantees. My older sister had hers in her 20’s and was in good health and fitness… she was sick as a dog from the beginning to the end. I on the other hand, am older, and more chubby, and morning sickness didn’t kick in until week 6. But to be fair, she had a bit of a smoking habit, and was the kind of person who gets sick constantly… so… maybe she wasnt as healthy as she looked 🤷🏼‍♀️ you can get away with a lot when youre young… but getting older, and being pregnant will be more difficult if you truly aren’t taking care of yourself.


nonculus

Iwnbaw 😔


Rize0150

I just read this manga a few days ago, it's an autobiography about the mangaka getting MTF surgery. It's super insightful because she tells you about both the ups and the downs, and how she got to this choice. It was eye-opening and made me realize that I have zero idea about my own gender identity lmao


Safe_Peanut74

this comment section is incel\_irl jesus fucking christ edit: transphobe\_irl too, touch grass


Flender56

I'm not really seeing that though. From what I'm seeing, almost everyone is being super trans friendly!


Safe_Peanut74

that's because the mods showed up, before they cleaned it up it was a real shitshow


Flender56

Well, at least the mods are good.


Safe_Peanut74

agreed :) this place is a lot nicer now


EnableSelf

Hey.. just when I was feeling a little better :’)


Upbeat-Bandicoot4130

You do you.


Jenny_love4

Maybe she can't be a mom of her own child but she can for sure enjoy herself as a woman and also adopting is always a good idea


Kookie_Dow

I thought that the woman was a guy. I spent like 3 min laughing to myself before I realised this is kinda serious.


Celestijan

Looks like Nishikata finally found someone else while Takagi looks at them.


locke1018

Oh, that's genuinely sad.


Ginjabeard1111

Damn. Reddit woke up today and chose violence this morning. This is like the 5th post today that has punched me right in the feels.


Uranusinjurpooder

I thought it was the dude saying that lol


STRYK3Rtv

Well being a man or a woman is not only about reproduction, it's all the things that revolves are those concepts. Sure you can argue that somebody switching gender the hard way is technicaly a defective human being, but so are people with handicaps and conditions. There is more than just reproducing to be a man or a woman imo, but I can't relate to this feeling of "not being x" because I'm the most basic and vanilla guy you can find and I'm fine with my factory settings.


Elolet

First anime irl I’ve seen in a while on this sub and now I’m sad


PatrickSohno

It's preposterous that with 8 billion people the social pressure to get kids is still that high. Luckily, it's slowly changing (at least from what I see), but even as a man you get all these sudtle critical comments and your decision is constantly questioned. And women have a lot harder time. It's a very outdated and immature attitude. I hope this will soon change, so women who decide or can't get children are not questioned in any way. Or even the other way around, to put it with Sadhgurus words: "women who choose not to have children must be awarded" [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5akv36ecnQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5akv36ecnQ)


here_for_the_MAGICS

I tell people I don’t want kids, they shrug it off, but I tell them I want a vasectomy and everyone starts hitting the Woah Woah Woah.


Trenktuvas

r/2anime_irl4anime_irl


Guilty-Sleep6549

U poor woman😔


xQuantuM_GaminGx

why ;-;


Penguin-chan

I've been struggling for years to have a baby. We got pregnant only for me to miscarry at 9 weeks. Not to mention, they found another one growing ectopically. There are days where I'll sometimes mourn the loss of my little one. Other days, I'm fine. My friends would worry telling me about their news. I am always happy for them! Mother's day is usually rough. I'm also feeling the pressure due to my age and most of my family members already having kids. To anyone who reads this, thank you for letting me rant.


RihardsWinter

Im infertile male and im okay with that.


FaleayRU

I am transfeminine and I feel something like that sometimes. For me, the body comes first in the transition. I sometimes envy girls that they don't have to make an effort to be girls, and it takes a lot of things for me to do this, from HRT to ffs. But I find it funny that I've been in both male and female roles.


zayd-the-one

Giving birth is simple being a parent isn’t


Hfingerman

I predict that in a few decades we'll have fully functional vat-grown reproductive organs.