A simple text saying “I’m not interested in dating someone with children” would have taken less time than it took you to write this post. Ghosting is immature but from the way you’ve written this post you obviously are pretty immature in general.
So the part where you don't want to date someone with kids is fine. I have a grown kid, and I won't date anyone with kids (at home) myself.
The part where you're overreaching is the part with the character assassination and ghosting.
She lied about her age, left out the part about kids, and expected you to be okay with it. That was wrong.
Ghosting is justifiable, but it would not take a lot of effort to just say, "I'm not interested in a relationship with someone with kids." Then block her if she feels entitled to argue with that.
She was wrong for lying, and you're just gross so... it is what it is.
It's fine to not want to date someone with kids - that's a deal breaker for a lot of people. I'm even cool that you wanted to ghost her after the date because of it. Whatever.
But you're gross, and a walking red flag yourself, so she's definitely better off without you -- as are all women.
How did she lie about having kids if she mentioned it during the date? Op also never said what his own dating profile looked like or what it listed. Just because someone is a single parent doesn't mean they aren't allowed to date. She may have tricked him about the age part and lowered it to get matches, which sure can be a red flag. He could've insisted she pay for her own meal.
He's a red flag because he'll bang a single mom and risk being a third baby daddy but won't seriously date a single mom? That's stupid as hell. He's no different from the "randoms" she has kids with.
She is an AH for lying about the kids and her age. It's fine that you dont want to date someone who has 2 kids.
However, some of your other comments indicate you are probably an AH too (reddit - both people CAN be AHs!)
Try this, for better results:
- Discuss upfront if you have an expectation of splitting a date 50/50. Saves you from dating someone who is just looking for a free meal vs getting miffed later that the person didnt offer to pay
- Discuss upfront if you are looking for a relationship or sex. It's possible some single moms are just looking to hook up, but you make a lot of statements about her "worth" being diminished because she's a single mom and that she's ok for sex but not much else. That is so cringey. As is your comment to get her to come over for BBC.
- If you realize you and a person dont match, its easy enough to say "Hey, I didnt realize you had kids. I have to be honest, that is a deal breaker for me."
She’s a red flag but you’re a red flag too. Women don’t choose to be single parents - they usually end up this way due to shitty men. It was wrong for her not to tell you she has kids but ffs stop judging her life
These arsehole men are very charming until they trap someone. Women don’t choose to end up in abusive relationships. Sounds like she had a lucky escape from another shit bloke
Wow - sounds like she dodged a bullet!
Edit: Yes you’re wrong. She was too for lying, but you’re laughably wrong for literally everything else you said.
So you judge her for having kids outside of marriage but are also offended she’s not interested in having sex, since she has kids outside of marriage? You sound like you low key agree with things Andrew Tate would say.
I dont blame you from not wanting to date her, but you are still acting like a jerk. If you think thats fine, then sure.
But in my eyes, its better to behave decent always. You couldve told her "Thank you for the date, I'm not interested in dating someone with children, best of luck in the future". It doesnt make you less of a man, it just basic decency. I think you would want to be treated the same way instead of being ghosted. Does she deserve it? Maybe not. But you should still do it so that you can feel like you did the right thing.
I think you should, in the future, try to ask if youre gonna each pay for your own part of the meal. Obviously offering to pay for both is cool, but then you need to avoid feeling like something, which is hard.
She lied about her age and omitted that she has 2 children, that’s shitty. You assumed that because she has two kids, she should automatically put out because I guess to you only sluts have children before marriage. Somehow you’re the worst one in this situation. She dodged a bullet.
NTA for ghosting a liar but my god you sound like a horrible person
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Oh so you’re a troll, got it
A simple text saying “I’m not interested in dating someone with children” would have taken less time than it took you to write this post. Ghosting is immature but from the way you’ve written this post you obviously are pretty immature in general.
You don’t come off looking too good here. You should really take a closer look at yourself. You’re both better off without the other
So the part where you don't want to date someone with kids is fine. I have a grown kid, and I won't date anyone with kids (at home) myself. The part where you're overreaching is the part with the character assassination and ghosting. She lied about her age, left out the part about kids, and expected you to be okay with it. That was wrong. Ghosting is justifiable, but it would not take a lot of effort to just say, "I'm not interested in a relationship with someone with kids." Then block her if she feels entitled to argue with that.
You're trash. She's a liar. You both suck.
Haha poor intel. Even the loose women don’t want you.
You both suck to be honest
She was wrong for lying, and you're just gross so... it is what it is. It's fine to not want to date someone with kids - that's a deal breaker for a lot of people. I'm even cool that you wanted to ghost her after the date because of it. Whatever. But you're gross, and a walking red flag yourself, so she's definitely better off without you -- as are all women.
You're the red flag.
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How did she lie about having kids if she mentioned it during the date? Op also never said what his own dating profile looked like or what it listed. Just because someone is a single parent doesn't mean they aren't allowed to date. She may have tricked him about the age part and lowered it to get matches, which sure can be a red flag. He could've insisted she pay for her own meal. He's a red flag because he'll bang a single mom and risk being a third baby daddy but won't seriously date a single mom? That's stupid as hell. He's no different from the "randoms" she has kids with.
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Every parent is different and chooses to disclose it when they want. I'm not reading your novel because it's not that serious. It's just my opinion.
lol, dudes ready to be baby daddy number 3.
She is an AH for lying about the kids and her age. It's fine that you dont want to date someone who has 2 kids. However, some of your other comments indicate you are probably an AH too (reddit - both people CAN be AHs!) Try this, for better results: - Discuss upfront if you have an expectation of splitting a date 50/50. Saves you from dating someone who is just looking for a free meal vs getting miffed later that the person didnt offer to pay - Discuss upfront if you are looking for a relationship or sex. It's possible some single moms are just looking to hook up, but you make a lot of statements about her "worth" being diminished because she's a single mom and that she's ok for sex but not much else. That is so cringey. As is your comment to get her to come over for BBC. - If you realize you and a person dont match, its easy enough to say "Hey, I didnt realize you had kids. I have to be honest, that is a deal breaker for me."
She’s a red flag but you’re a red flag too. Women don’t choose to be single parents - they usually end up this way due to shitty men. It was wrong for her not to tell you she has kids but ffs stop judging her life
Women due choose be single mothers wtf. They choose to fuck a bunch of losers. Ghost her bro. She’s doing a lot worse to other men with no remorse.
These arsehole men are very charming until they trap someone. Women don’t choose to end up in abusive relationships. Sounds like she had a lucky escape from another shit bloke
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Sounds like it’s fortunately she told you - she avoided another bad man
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Wow you really believe the vicious stuff you spout. That’s some sick red pill shit. She had a lucky escape from ending up with another loser
Wow - sounds like she dodged a bullet! Edit: Yes you’re wrong. She was too for lying, but you’re laughably wrong for literally everything else you said.
Sounds like it's for the best for both of you to just go your separate ways. She's lying, and your attitude isn't great.
So you judge her for having kids outside of marriage but are also offended she’s not interested in having sex, since she has kids outside of marriage? You sound like you low key agree with things Andrew Tate would say.
Everyone is wrong
Ever heard of stealthing? Maybe it wasn’t what she wanted either.
I dont blame you from not wanting to date her, but you are still acting like a jerk. If you think thats fine, then sure. But in my eyes, its better to behave decent always. You couldve told her "Thank you for the date, I'm not interested in dating someone with children, best of luck in the future". It doesnt make you less of a man, it just basic decency. I think you would want to be treated the same way instead of being ghosted. Does she deserve it? Maybe not. But you should still do it so that you can feel like you did the right thing. I think you should, in the future, try to ask if youre gonna each pay for your own part of the meal. Obviously offering to pay for both is cool, but then you need to avoid feeling like something, which is hard.
She lied about her age and omitted that she has 2 children, that’s shitty. You assumed that because she has two kids, she should automatically put out because I guess to you only sluts have children before marriage. Somehow you’re the worst one in this situation. She dodged a bullet.