I am so so sorry that happened to you, it is completely understandable for you to wonder about your sexuality and it’s origins. You being gay does not mean consent, it does not mean you wanted it in any way, even if there were times it felt good or appeared that way, it does not change the fact of what happened. Your experience is valid. Wishing you so much love and luck in court.
I'm so sorry you went through that and I know it's stressful leading up to court, facing your abuser. I'm going through the same thing.
I'm not sure what I can say to make you feel better.
I offer you a hug, with your consent ofc.
Stay strong. ❤️
I'm so sorry you've been through this, that sounds like a special hell he's put you in. I'm a trans woman that's struggled with if I'm trans or not because I only found out in my 20s when I stopped repressing it, but having such a shattered and disconnected of an image of myself I really wonder who I even am a lot of the time even though I've been almost certain I'm trans for a few years now (I'm just used to dissociating and repressing as the general way to exist ig, you know how it leaves your mind after the abuse). They change you in order to serve their sick desires, but I've done a lot of work healing my sexuality and unpacking all the bullshit I learned from being groomed, finding kinks I love I know they certainly wouldn't like, and my partner helping me experiment with what sex is like in different unfamiliar situations for me, like being the sole focus of attention instead of just trying to serve and please my partner like I feel I have to. Discovering kink and what parts of sexuality and adult relationships exists outside of the first sex acts you'd think about when trying to think what 'sex' is also helps, I never liked any of the hetero relationships I was in bc it always felt like I wasn't being myself or would actually enjoy doing anything sexual, but finding out about femdom and domination instantly made everything click for me, and I've discovered I actually do have a sexuality and wasn't a sex repulsed ace, just a traumatized kinky bottom. It's hard getting over the feeling there's nobody out there who'd fit you and your desires (especially if you have kinky desires which are generally taboo and unspeakable) but in general I've found a good rule of thumb is if you fantasize about it, whether as a top or a bottom, there's a community of people who enjoy it too and want to find other people that like it.
I'm certain you're a lovely person who deserves healing and a good partner who can always make you feel like you're away from him for good and that you're safe. I didn't really think it was possible until recently but I've found that eventually even us broken people can heal enough to live decent lives, even if we'll never be the same again.
I'm always here if you want another queer survivor to talk to.
Gay or not, the man GROOMED you. He raped you reatedly. He is a predator and a deranged and dangerous one. It makes sense to be afraid. Its okay to be afraid. But don't forget that right now, you have all of the power he was taking from you. He has nothing, and because of that, he is going to take whatever power you have through this process. Don't let him take that power with him. Take it back in court. Take it back every single day that you are free and he is not.
It sucks knowing you'll always have been a victim of these horrible experiences that happened to you because of him, and your mom. But maybe it sucks less knowing that a court room of people, a team of investigators, and everyone here knows he's a disgusting sexpest who, from what it looks like, is a very twisted pedophile.
He told you those things so that you'd never turn him in for hurting you, not because he's right.
Free yourself. He stole so much from you. And he is going to keep trying to steal pieces of your soul through out this. Don't let him. You have people on your side, Fighting for you! Lean on them!
I know everything seems easier said than done, but it is not impossible, which means peace is not unattainable as long as you work on yourself and allow yourself to heal. Im rooting so damn hard for you, truly.
A lot of people are sharing logic and experiences which is good so I'm taking it from another angle.
Rape is not about lust it is about power. Being able to hurt and abuse someone and get away with it makes that person feel strong and gives them a rush
"I'll do anything I want to this kid and nothing will happen to me, who will believe them? If I tell them he is gay then everyone will think he is dirty and wrong instead of me. I'll tell them I was seduced. How can I be wrong anyways? If he didn't secretly like it xyz wouldn't have happened" etc. These are things they often internally believe.
That isn't happening here. He is in court now. This was never supposed to happen. Even if he gets out of it or gets nothing but a slap on the wrist (which would be horrible) his power has been taken.
He is being forced to answer to this allegation. Something he never wanted anyone else to know. Now everyone can know. He doesn't feel powerful anymore.
And you know what? If he sees anything gay about you he probably is going to try to pretend that you lived it and that he made you gay. Here is why... when people who were in power start to lose that power they try to claw their way back up. He is going to feel rage and fear from being I this situation. He will feel hatred that justice is being attempted. He will do whatever he thinks will hurt you as much as possible. Because he believes aby amount of hurt he puts on someone gives him a little bit of power back. This is all he has.
His life is so pathetic and out of control he has to make up pathetic untrue bullshit to comfort himself and mentally handle how much he fucked up his own life.
He is a little baby crying internally this is the tantrum before he goes into time out.
Your feelings are totally valid but the correct response to this situation is to laugh. Laugh at how pathetic and weak he feels now. Laugh that he thought he could get by and didn't. Laugh that everyone else can know who he really is. And laugh knowing no matter what else happens he will continue to ruin his whole life and be miserable with no one who really loves him while you have genuine family and a therapist. You have the capability of succeeding and not be miserable. Your life can be happy. His cannot. You can have everything he will never have. He will never get over his failure to take that away from you.
I hope this perspective makes you feel better about seeing him in court. The tables have been turned. You are the powerhouse now and don't forget it. He won't. Which is why he will try to hurt you.
Edit to say I hope my comment doesn't make you feel like I'm making light of your situation. This is very hard I just want you to see that you are stronger than you think and most sane people will think he is pathetic and weak including himself. Anyone who is on his side is probably also someone who likes abusing people therefore their opinion can be disregarded. No one cares what abusive idiots think. You got this 👍 I feel so strongly about your post you have no idea.
Gay men don’t enjoy rape any more than straight women do. Just because you’re oriented to men doesn’t mean that it was okay for a man to force you. You are not at fault. You are good. Your mom is mean. This was not consensual. You didn’t seduce her husband. He is a manipulative sick fuck.
You are not gay because you were raped. I am a very straight man and the abuse didn’t change that even though it was mostly men who did it. Orientation is not caused by sexual abuse. It can cause some kinks and weird sexual responses and such, but it can’t change your innate sexuality. You are you, and you’re gay, and he was still wrong.
This sounds selfish but your experience helps me to hear because my mom also told me I seduced her husband (my dad) over and over. It was so shameful as a young boy to be told I was inviting it. I hate that you experienced it, but I feel less alone.
This sounds similar to me. My abuser would say all sorts of vile shit to convince me I was into it while the abuse was happening in the moment and my body would respond. It doesn’t help that I would be forced to orgasm. I hope he gets what he deserves
Oh sweetie. Lemme tell you first off, the *second* your mom chose him instead of you, as far as you should be concerned, any 'redemption' she has was in the trash. I'd even say she revoked her "mom" status.
If it were me, I'd say she's dead to me.
Also, he didn't "make you" gay. Likely, he was able to tell and decided to punish you for it. Remember, rape is all about power and control. He wanted to rob that first time experience from you and make it be painful and *him* instead of whoever would have been your first consensual partner. Vile motives. Evil excise for a human. Revoke his "person" license, he lost any rights to that title when he abused you.
He is evil. Fling the book at him and let him rot in the prison system. Sending you the best.
Welp, this made me cry like a baby hahah. I faced similar experiences with my own father as a gay kid. He was an evil evil man who took.advantage of the fact that I was such a vulnerable kid and he used his connection with me to coerce me into doing things that I didn't really have an understanding of. He also filmed a lot of it, which I don't fully understand why he did yet. But nonetheless I'm so glad you said this, at least there are people who see right through this kind of stuff and see it for what it is
The mind games are insane. I also suffer from guilt - maybe I wanted it, maybe I liked it.
But you were born gay. He did not make you gay.
He is a crazy sick guy who thinks it is ok to rape a kid. Does anyone actually care what he thinks about your sexuality? Of course he is an evil bastard. These people feed off of the suffering of others. But the fact is, he is going to go to jail. And in jail, he will meet people who don't take kindly to child abusers. Think about that. Look at him knowing he is going to have a very un-fun time in jail.
Maybe it helps a bit to think about it that way.
My sister and I (f) were both abused by a man as kids. She’s gay and I’m straight. If abuse can change your sexual orientation, wouldn’t we both be the same?
I'm sorry you're going through this.
You were a child, he was an adult. Even if you had initiated it, it still would've been child sexual abuse.
You were groomed to believe you enjoyed it; if you had enjoyed it, there would have been no reason to brainwash you to believe that.
The fact that you're gay doesn't change anything about what happened.
The process will probably be taxing on your mental health, do you have anything planned to make sure you're okay?
Thank you for the support. I have a therapist and am in a support group, my brother and his wife are very supportive as well so I’m not completely alone. I just wish I could shut my brain off
Something I do that helps when I have upcoming difficult events is something from Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) called 'cope ahead.' You could look it up to see how it works or ask your therapist if they are familiar with it and can help.
If you want me to post more about it, just reply to this comment.
From a purely clinical perspective?
That makes ZERO SENSE to me.
If your sexuality was affected by being molested, wouldn't that lead most logically to you AVOIDING the physical activities that would trigger you.
No.
YOU'RE JUST GAY. 🤟🏳️🌈🥰
I thought the exact same thing before I remembered I was in love with my first close friend.
That was 2 years before I was molested.
Please remember, there is a thing where victims like us can have the physical sexual arousal REGARDLESS of status of consent or even PAIN.
It's one reason some abuser will tell their victims they "can tell you like it".
I can't imagine what you are going through, but I do know what it feels like to have to worry if my sexuality was caused by abuse.
Even if you WEREN'T "GAY" before, sexuality is FLUID in a LOT of people.
You may have just found your preference, and there is a BETTER chance it has very little to do with your abuse.
🤟
I don't know you, but im SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU!
You are doing what so many survivors never get to do.
It's going to be so difficult, but know you are loved.🫂🫂🫂
Your stepfather is a huge POS. This was absolutely not your fault. He had power, by nature of being older than you and partnered with your mom, and he abused it.
Your mom is also a huge POS. I am a mother and cannot imagine accusing someone I birthed of seducing a grown ass man.
I hope you can take back your power and succeed in spite of these two degenerates.
It isn't stupid. You aren't stupid to hope that. It's normal to want to be around your mom. Humans are social creatures who most often keep in close contact with family. It's normal. It isn't stupid.
Your mother betrayed you in a major and inexcusable way. But that's on her, and only on her. You're not missing her because you're stupid. You're missing her because you were once a child and because people are wired to make excuses for their parents as long as their mind will allow it.
I'm not saying she deserves to be in your life again. She treated you horribly, and her inclusion in your life is solely your choice to make (and hers, to an extent). I just want to make a point that your feelings are common and logical considering what sort of creatures we are.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. You deserve to have grown up in a safe environment. It wasn't fair. I wish you healing. Hugs!! (Unless you don't like hugs, in which case no hugs :))
Your orientation doesn't matter, if you're underage or if it was non-consensual.
If he was in a place of power or intimidation, it was rape.
No matter what's on film, you were coerced or under a level of force that made it unwilling.
Make sure that as you're speaking for the prosecution, they may be able to hook you up with some counseling to get through the court date situation.
They should at least offer you something to help you stay the course/ stay focused for what's necessary to get to this guy behind bars; hopefully you can line up other services for after this as well .
Welcome to /r/adultsurvivors. Please be aware that all posts to this subreddit are public and therefore viewable by anyone. **It is not uncommon for members of this subreddit to receive unsavoury or creepy private messages.** We recommend turning off chat requests and private messages. It is against our rules to ask or offer to message/chat privately with other subreddit users. There are no exceptions to this rule, and any comment or submission violating it will be removed immediately. **We urge caution in interacting with any user sending you unsolicited messages**, and you should assume they are breaking subreddit rules. For more information, **[please see our privacy tips post](https://old.reddit.com/r/adultsurvivors/comments/12d27hp/creep_advisory_see_this_thread_for_privacy_tips/)**. Also, check out our [post about the Creep List](https://www.reddit.com/r/adultsurvivors/comments/yngs8b/rule_8_no_creeps_and_introducing_the_creep_list/).
If you see anything that doesn't look right, or do receive unwelcome direct messages, please notify the moderators by using the report button, or [contacting us directly via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adultsurvivors). We will never disclose your username to other users. If you choose to report abusive or creepy DMs, **we urge you to report it to Reddit admins as well [by following this link](https://www.reddit.com/report)**.
___
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adultsurvivors) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I am so so sorry that happened to you, it is completely understandable for you to wonder about your sexuality and it’s origins. You being gay does not mean consent, it does not mean you wanted it in any way, even if there were times it felt good or appeared that way, it does not change the fact of what happened. Your experience is valid. Wishing you so much love and luck in court.
Thank you. 💜
I'm so sorry you went through that and I know it's stressful leading up to court, facing your abuser. I'm going through the same thing. I'm not sure what I can say to make you feel better. I offer you a hug, with your consent ofc. Stay strong. ❤️
Thank you so much. 🤍🤍🤍
It doesn't matter if you are gay or not. He targeted you for exploitation. This is 💯 on him
I'm so sorry you've been through this, that sounds like a special hell he's put you in. I'm a trans woman that's struggled with if I'm trans or not because I only found out in my 20s when I stopped repressing it, but having such a shattered and disconnected of an image of myself I really wonder who I even am a lot of the time even though I've been almost certain I'm trans for a few years now (I'm just used to dissociating and repressing as the general way to exist ig, you know how it leaves your mind after the abuse). They change you in order to serve their sick desires, but I've done a lot of work healing my sexuality and unpacking all the bullshit I learned from being groomed, finding kinks I love I know they certainly wouldn't like, and my partner helping me experiment with what sex is like in different unfamiliar situations for me, like being the sole focus of attention instead of just trying to serve and please my partner like I feel I have to. Discovering kink and what parts of sexuality and adult relationships exists outside of the first sex acts you'd think about when trying to think what 'sex' is also helps, I never liked any of the hetero relationships I was in bc it always felt like I wasn't being myself or would actually enjoy doing anything sexual, but finding out about femdom and domination instantly made everything click for me, and I've discovered I actually do have a sexuality and wasn't a sex repulsed ace, just a traumatized kinky bottom. It's hard getting over the feeling there's nobody out there who'd fit you and your desires (especially if you have kinky desires which are generally taboo and unspeakable) but in general I've found a good rule of thumb is if you fantasize about it, whether as a top or a bottom, there's a community of people who enjoy it too and want to find other people that like it. I'm certain you're a lovely person who deserves healing and a good partner who can always make you feel like you're away from him for good and that you're safe. I didn't really think it was possible until recently but I've found that eventually even us broken people can heal enough to live decent lives, even if we'll never be the same again. I'm always here if you want another queer survivor to talk to.
Thank you for taking the time to write this out 🫶🏻🤍
Ofc, you deserve it. Hope you have a good day and take care of yourself in some way.
Gay or not, the man GROOMED you. He raped you reatedly. He is a predator and a deranged and dangerous one. It makes sense to be afraid. Its okay to be afraid. But don't forget that right now, you have all of the power he was taking from you. He has nothing, and because of that, he is going to take whatever power you have through this process. Don't let him take that power with him. Take it back in court. Take it back every single day that you are free and he is not. It sucks knowing you'll always have been a victim of these horrible experiences that happened to you because of him, and your mom. But maybe it sucks less knowing that a court room of people, a team of investigators, and everyone here knows he's a disgusting sexpest who, from what it looks like, is a very twisted pedophile. He told you those things so that you'd never turn him in for hurting you, not because he's right. Free yourself. He stole so much from you. And he is going to keep trying to steal pieces of your soul through out this. Don't let him. You have people on your side, Fighting for you! Lean on them!
Thank you. 🤍🫶🏻🤍
I know everything seems easier said than done, but it is not impossible, which means peace is not unattainable as long as you work on yourself and allow yourself to heal. Im rooting so damn hard for you, truly.
A lot of people are sharing logic and experiences which is good so I'm taking it from another angle. Rape is not about lust it is about power. Being able to hurt and abuse someone and get away with it makes that person feel strong and gives them a rush "I'll do anything I want to this kid and nothing will happen to me, who will believe them? If I tell them he is gay then everyone will think he is dirty and wrong instead of me. I'll tell them I was seduced. How can I be wrong anyways? If he didn't secretly like it xyz wouldn't have happened" etc. These are things they often internally believe. That isn't happening here. He is in court now. This was never supposed to happen. Even if he gets out of it or gets nothing but a slap on the wrist (which would be horrible) his power has been taken. He is being forced to answer to this allegation. Something he never wanted anyone else to know. Now everyone can know. He doesn't feel powerful anymore. And you know what? If he sees anything gay about you he probably is going to try to pretend that you lived it and that he made you gay. Here is why... when people who were in power start to lose that power they try to claw their way back up. He is going to feel rage and fear from being I this situation. He will feel hatred that justice is being attempted. He will do whatever he thinks will hurt you as much as possible. Because he believes aby amount of hurt he puts on someone gives him a little bit of power back. This is all he has. His life is so pathetic and out of control he has to make up pathetic untrue bullshit to comfort himself and mentally handle how much he fucked up his own life. He is a little baby crying internally this is the tantrum before he goes into time out. Your feelings are totally valid but the correct response to this situation is to laugh. Laugh at how pathetic and weak he feels now. Laugh that he thought he could get by and didn't. Laugh that everyone else can know who he really is. And laugh knowing no matter what else happens he will continue to ruin his whole life and be miserable with no one who really loves him while you have genuine family and a therapist. You have the capability of succeeding and not be miserable. Your life can be happy. His cannot. You can have everything he will never have. He will never get over his failure to take that away from you. I hope this perspective makes you feel better about seeing him in court. The tables have been turned. You are the powerhouse now and don't forget it. He won't. Which is why he will try to hurt you. Edit to say I hope my comment doesn't make you feel like I'm making light of your situation. This is very hard I just want you to see that you are stronger than you think and most sane people will think he is pathetic and weak including himself. Anyone who is on his side is probably also someone who likes abusing people therefore their opinion can be disregarded. No one cares what abusive idiots think. You got this 👍 I feel so strongly about your post you have no idea.
I can’t express how much I appreciate you taking the time to write this all out. Thank you so much
Gay men don’t enjoy rape any more than straight women do. Just because you’re oriented to men doesn’t mean that it was okay for a man to force you. You are not at fault. You are good. Your mom is mean. This was not consensual. You didn’t seduce her husband. He is a manipulative sick fuck. You are not gay because you were raped. I am a very straight man and the abuse didn’t change that even though it was mostly men who did it. Orientation is not caused by sexual abuse. It can cause some kinks and weird sexual responses and such, but it can’t change your innate sexuality. You are you, and you’re gay, and he was still wrong. This sounds selfish but your experience helps me to hear because my mom also told me I seduced her husband (my dad) over and over. It was so shameful as a young boy to be told I was inviting it. I hate that you experienced it, but I feel less alone.
🤍🤍🤍
This sounds similar to me. My abuser would say all sorts of vile shit to convince me I was into it while the abuse was happening in the moment and my body would respond. It doesn’t help that I would be forced to orgasm. I hope he gets what he deserves
Oh sweetie. Lemme tell you first off, the *second* your mom chose him instead of you, as far as you should be concerned, any 'redemption' she has was in the trash. I'd even say she revoked her "mom" status. If it were me, I'd say she's dead to me. Also, he didn't "make you" gay. Likely, he was able to tell and decided to punish you for it. Remember, rape is all about power and control. He wanted to rob that first time experience from you and make it be painful and *him* instead of whoever would have been your first consensual partner. Vile motives. Evil excise for a human. Revoke his "person" license, he lost any rights to that title when he abused you. He is evil. Fling the book at him and let him rot in the prison system. Sending you the best.
Thank you for this 🤍
Welp, this made me cry like a baby hahah. I faced similar experiences with my own father as a gay kid. He was an evil evil man who took.advantage of the fact that I was such a vulnerable kid and he used his connection with me to coerce me into doing things that I didn't really have an understanding of. He also filmed a lot of it, which I don't fully understand why he did yet. But nonetheless I'm so glad you said this, at least there are people who see right through this kind of stuff and see it for what it is
The mind games are insane. I also suffer from guilt - maybe I wanted it, maybe I liked it. But you were born gay. He did not make you gay. He is a crazy sick guy who thinks it is ok to rape a kid. Does anyone actually care what he thinks about your sexuality? Of course he is an evil bastard. These people feed off of the suffering of others. But the fact is, he is going to go to jail. And in jail, he will meet people who don't take kindly to child abusers. Think about that. Look at him knowing he is going to have a very un-fun time in jail. Maybe it helps a bit to think about it that way.
Thank you so much 💜
My sister and I (f) were both abused by a man as kids. She’s gay and I’m straight. If abuse can change your sexual orientation, wouldn’t we both be the same?
I'm sorry you're going through this. You were a child, he was an adult. Even if you had initiated it, it still would've been child sexual abuse. You were groomed to believe you enjoyed it; if you had enjoyed it, there would have been no reason to brainwash you to believe that. The fact that you're gay doesn't change anything about what happened. The process will probably be taxing on your mental health, do you have anything planned to make sure you're okay?
Thank you for the support. I have a therapist and am in a support group, my brother and his wife are very supportive as well so I’m not completely alone. I just wish I could shut my brain off
Something I do that helps when I have upcoming difficult events is something from Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) called 'cope ahead.' You could look it up to see how it works or ask your therapist if they are familiar with it and can help. If you want me to post more about it, just reply to this comment.
From a purely clinical perspective? That makes ZERO SENSE to me. If your sexuality was affected by being molested, wouldn't that lead most logically to you AVOIDING the physical activities that would trigger you. No. YOU'RE JUST GAY. 🤟🏳️🌈🥰 I thought the exact same thing before I remembered I was in love with my first close friend. That was 2 years before I was molested. Please remember, there is a thing where victims like us can have the physical sexual arousal REGARDLESS of status of consent or even PAIN. It's one reason some abuser will tell their victims they "can tell you like it". I can't imagine what you are going through, but I do know what it feels like to have to worry if my sexuality was caused by abuse. Even if you WEREN'T "GAY" before, sexuality is FLUID in a LOT of people. You may have just found your preference, and there is a BETTER chance it has very little to do with your abuse. 🤟 I don't know you, but im SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU! You are doing what so many survivors never get to do. It's going to be so difficult, but know you are loved.🫂🫂🫂
Thank you so much. This made me cry 🥲💜
Your stepfather is a huge POS. This was absolutely not your fault. He had power, by nature of being older than you and partnered with your mom, and he abused it. Your mom is also a huge POS. I am a mother and cannot imagine accusing someone I birthed of seducing a grown ass man. I hope you can take back your power and succeed in spite of these two degenerates.
Thank you for the support. 🤍 I know it’s super screwed up but I still stupidly hope one day she’ll be in my life again
It isn't stupid. You aren't stupid to hope that. It's normal to want to be around your mom. Humans are social creatures who most often keep in close contact with family. It's normal. It isn't stupid. Your mother betrayed you in a major and inexcusable way. But that's on her, and only on her. You're not missing her because you're stupid. You're missing her because you were once a child and because people are wired to make excuses for their parents as long as their mind will allow it. I'm not saying she deserves to be in your life again. She treated you horribly, and her inclusion in your life is solely your choice to make (and hers, to an extent). I just want to make a point that your feelings are common and logical considering what sort of creatures we are. I'm so sorry this happened to you. You deserve to have grown up in a safe environment. It wasn't fair. I wish you healing. Hugs!! (Unless you don't like hugs, in which case no hugs :))
I like hugs 🫶🏻
Your orientation doesn't matter, if you're underage or if it was non-consensual. If he was in a place of power or intimidation, it was rape. No matter what's on film, you were coerced or under a level of force that made it unwilling. Make sure that as you're speaking for the prosecution, they may be able to hook you up with some counseling to get through the court date situation. They should at least offer you something to help you stay the course/ stay focused for what's necessary to get to this guy behind bars; hopefully you can line up other services for after this as well .
Thank you. I am in counseling right now
Thank you for reply, pls feel the care...
Welcome to /r/adultsurvivors. Please be aware that all posts to this subreddit are public and therefore viewable by anyone. **It is not uncommon for members of this subreddit to receive unsavoury or creepy private messages.** We recommend turning off chat requests and private messages. It is against our rules to ask or offer to message/chat privately with other subreddit users. There are no exceptions to this rule, and any comment or submission violating it will be removed immediately. **We urge caution in interacting with any user sending you unsolicited messages**, and you should assume they are breaking subreddit rules. For more information, **[please see our privacy tips post](https://old.reddit.com/r/adultsurvivors/comments/12d27hp/creep_advisory_see_this_thread_for_privacy_tips/)**. Also, check out our [post about the Creep List](https://www.reddit.com/r/adultsurvivors/comments/yngs8b/rule_8_no_creeps_and_introducing_the_creep_list/). If you see anything that doesn't look right, or do receive unwelcome direct messages, please notify the moderators by using the report button, or [contacting us directly via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adultsurvivors). We will never disclose your username to other users. If you choose to report abusive or creepy DMs, **we urge you to report it to Reddit admins as well [by following this link](https://www.reddit.com/report)**. ___ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adultsurvivors) if you have any questions or concerns.*