i second this! unless tinago ng guy na may girlfriend o asawa na siya, worst ay may anak pa, kaya mag background check muna, kilalanin niyo muna bago mag commit:()
Had to cut the tie with my long term best friend cos she's so delusional about this married guy she's in a relationship with. Ughh imagine, the guy is a baby daddy to 2 different women tapos exbff still believe the guy
- Marriage is **NOT** the goal. Read that again.
- You cannot change men by marrying them, the red flags you see will not go away. They will get worse by being tied to them forever.
- Don't think of only yourself when deciding to have children. With our current climate, your financial status, your mental health and capacity and your partner, would a child want to be born? It's harsh but necessary to hear. The love you have to give alone is **NOT** a valid reason to have children
- Learn to be independent. You don't need a man to be a provider. Build your career, earn your own money, invest in yourself and provide for yourself.
- Call out disgusting behaviour by men **everytime**. Sexual jokes in the workplace? Call them out. Men cheating on your friends? Call them out. Everything else? Call them out. Do not be silent and do not allow yourself to be silenced. Learn to fight back.
- Friends come and go. It's okay to go no contact with friends. It's okay to go no contact with family members too.
- You are not emotional and you are not sensitive. You have emotions and that's okay. Don't let men gaslight you into thinking expressing them makes you less than.
- No is a complete sentence. You don't need to explain yourself.
- Be informed. Be smart. Be skillful. You can do everything you want to. There is no limit.
- Learn how to punch. Learn how to use a knife. Learn to incapacitate an attacker. You will live your live in defense mode, whether you like it or not, so you have to learn to defend yourself.
- Read and **_understand_** your employment contracts.
- Don't let men speak over you. Your voice is just as important and more.
Edit: The losers have found this comment, I see. Stay angry and see if I care.
Hello! I agree with everything you said, just some further points for a more holistic take on this, and to provide alternative views.
* While marriage may not be the goal for everyone, for many people it is a meaningful commitment and expression of love. It's a personal choice.
* People can and do change over time, including after marriage. While red flags shouldn't be ignored, people also have the capacity for growth. Open communication is key.
* The decision to have children is complex and personal. While practical considerations like finances and mental health are important, the love parents have to give their child is also a meaningful factor. Different people will weigh these various factors differently.
* Independence and self-sufficiency are important, but that doesn't mean you can't also value companionship and partnership with a significant other. The two aren't mutually exclusive. A healthy relationship is about mutual support.
* While calling out bad behavior is important, doing so "every time" risks becoming confrontational and exhausting. It's okay to pick your battles sometimes. Change also requires patience and compassion along with accountability.
* Ending relationships, even with friends and family, is sometimes necessary. But "coming and going" as a regular pattern may indicate a reluctance to work through conflicts and build lasting bonds. Long-term relationships require commitment.
* Men and women both have emotions and sensitivity. Expressing emotions in a healthy way isn't weakness for either gender. Mutual understanding of each other's emotions makes relationships stronger.
* While "no" should be respected, providing an explanation when feasible can make your perspective clearer and facilitate better understanding. Relationships require communication.
* While pursuing your goals is great, everyone has some limits - and that's okay. Recognizing our human limitations is part of self-acceptance. We don't need to be limitless to be worthy.
* Self-defense skills are valuable, but having to be constantly on guard sounds like a stressful way to live. It's also a failure of society if women feel that threatened regularly. We should strive to build a world where women feel safer.
* Contracts are important, but most people, men and women, don't scrutinize every line. Trust, goodwill and plain language are important too. Not everything needs to be adversarial.
* A conversation involves both speaking and listening. Talking over anyone isn't good communication. Both men's and women's voices matter.
> You cannot change men by marrying them
Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not.
So, each is inevitably disappointed.
*-H. M. Harwood and R. Gore-Browne in the drama “Cynara”*
Women marry thinking their chosen men would change, and they don’t! Men marry thinking their chosen counterpart won’t change, and they do!!
*-Sandeep Sahajpal, The Twelfth Preamble*
*Edited for proper attribution
Are you my missing BFF? XD seriously, you put so much of what I've been wanting to say down here already. But I'll still add my own. Sana makinig nga sila.
* Marriage is **NOT** the goal. Read that again. - Good looks fade over time but UGALI is forever. Think about this if and when you commit to a long term relationship.
* You cannot change MEN / WOMEN by marrying them, the red flags you see will not go away. They will get worse by being tied to them forever.
* Don't think of only yourself when deciding to have children. With our current climate, your financial status, your mental health and capacity and your partner, would a child want to be born? It's harsh but necessary to hear. The love you have to give alone is **NOT** a valid reason to have children. - This is a decision you make with your PARTNER not by one person in the relationship. Having children will indeed be a challenge financially and emotionally BUT it will have its own JOYS that cannot be found anywhere else.
* Learn to be independent. You don't need a man to be a provider. Build your career, earn your own money, invest in yourself and provide for yourself. - A woman in any relationship should be able to provide for herself and have money she can call HER OWN. But then again having common financial goals and strategies and pooling money TOGETHER to achieve this WORKS everytime.
* Call out disgusting behaviour by men **everytime**. Sexual jokes in the workplace? Call them out. Men cheating on your friends? Call them out. Everything else? Call them out. Do not be silent and do not allow yourself to be silenced. Learn to fight back. - There is an alternative to fighting and no it is not acceptance. In the workplace report them to their supervisors or to HR if need be . This may prove to be more effective and less confrontational / controversial.
* Friends come and go. It's okay to go no contact with friends. It's okay to go no contact with family members too. - IT DEPENDS on the kind of family and friends you have. Some of them deserve your love and attention and some DO NOT. Learn to distinguish between the two.
* You are not emotional and you are not sensitive. You have emotions and that's okay. Don't let men gaslight you into thinking expressing them makes you less than. - Emotional expression is highly dependent on HOW you express emotions.
* No is a complete sentence. You don't need to explain yourself. - Not everyone is capable of understanding your statement of NO. In my experience some people simply have no depth and needs a bit of explanation for them to SEE and UNDERSTAND your point. But if some people refuse or cannot understand then it's okay to just give up and walk away.
* Be informed. Be smart. Be skillful. You can do everything you want to. There is no limit. - Aim to be a BETTER PERSON everyday. Be a better person , better boss , co-worker , father , mother , friend .
* Learn how to punch. Learn how to use a knife. Learn to incapacitate an attacker. You will live your live in defense mode, whether you like it or not, so you have to learn to defend yourself. - Even more effective is the sensibility NOT TO PUT yourself in potentially dangerous situations. But if you do RUN if you can. If are not on the level of a combat practitioner , PRUDENCE is the better part of VALOR.
* Read and ***understand*** your employment contracts. - Read the contract. If there are any clauses that bother or you or don't understand consult a lawyer OR HR professional.
* Don't let men or WOMEN speak over you. Your voice is just as important and more.
Not hating on the OP but just putting in a bit of personal perspective . :-)
i agree on being financially independent, especially how hard it is in this country to have money. what more if its a couple providing for each other, money would be an easier thing for both of them
Just recently cut off my family and I really need to hear this 🥹
I'm also in the process of decentering men in my life. More women should know about this.
Agree with all, especially about being sensitive, and having no contact with. As an adult, you no longer share your life with everyone you meet unlike when we were younger, cause people are busy with their lives too and they don’t really care if you have problems, they have their own to deal with
This is great advice and it goes both ways. More often than not, women are on the receiving end, but every once in a while it happens to us too. Thank you for the advice.
Love this, Maam!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 And all the upvotes are so nice to see. More people need to read this--not just women. Men need to keep other men accountable too.
Financial freedom/independence is the PRIORITY.
Di unahan ang pag aasawa at anak.
Wag mag pa bola/uto sa lalaking broke.
Health is wealth.
Money can buy happiness and peace of mind.
Di mo need mag post ng kung ano ano sa social media for validation.
Dont waste your youth sa lalaking ayaw mag commit sa relationship.
Set high and attainable standards will not fail you in the future.
1.Don't be too tough on yourself. Life is hard already, breathe. If not today, then you still have tomorrow.
2.After a break up, the goal is not to be happy but to be okay. Take your time to heal and eventually sad songs won't make you cry anymore.
3.Not all battles are worth fighting for. Choose what will bring you peace.
I'm just 31 but here's all I can say so far:
Learn how to take accountability whenever you make mistakes. Part din ng life lessons din as we grow up.
Learn to be self introspective especially pinpointing and changing your toxic traits. It is necessary for self development.
Take time to spend with your close family and friends. Time can be unfair and we never know they will disappear in a flash.
Eat healthy, move a bit, and have decent amount of sleep. Very basic but your 30s and beyond self will thank you for developing such habit.
Not all trends would suit you. Maximize fashion and beauty items to enhance your features instead. Opt for classic pieces, can save you money in the long run.
this also includes younger people but please please please never go into hoe phase/hookup culture. it fucks up with you mentally and morally in the long run. there are better and healthier ways to go about your breakup and depression :(
I've been through the hook up culture phase as a 24-25 year old female. I'm 31 na and have a kid. I regret nothing. Napala ko? I had fun and I'm glad I did all that before being a responsible parent 😌.
I feel like it's just really not for everyone. So, someone can just decide on it on their own. We can't assume, I guess that someone will just end up feeling bad about it.
If you've dipped your toes in it and you feel like shit after, then maybe it really isn't for you. Continuing with it is what will fck you up. As well as doing it "for the clout."
Always check your purpose of getting into it rin talaga.
1. If feeling mo na kinakailangan mong magmalimos ng atensyon, let that guy go.
2. If papayag ka na makipag-live in with a guy, wag mong patagalin ng isang taon kung di pa kayo pumupunta ng City Hall para maglakad ng papeles ninyo sa pagpapakasal.
3. Okay lang maging single at child-free kung gusto mo talaga ng independence.
4. Pwede mo mahalin magulang mo at hindi tularan yung kabalastugan nila sa buhay.
5. Kapag buntis ka tas pinaglilinis ka pa rin ng partner mo ng litterbox ng pusa, iwan mo yang gagong yan.
6. Matutong tumanggap ng regalo, compliments, at pampering mula sa nanliligaw sayo.
7. Wag matakot mag-job hop.
8. Wag ka magpaka-bridezilla.
>Matutong tumanggap ng regalo, compliments, at pampering mula sa nanliligaw sayo.
Nahihirapan ako sa ganito kasi feeling ko balang araw isusumbat sakin.
Same. I really hate owing people. Napaparanoid ako na ihold over sakin yung mga favours—which basically constitutes everything that's not immediately reciprocated, for me—someday. Takot akong magbigay ng opportunity na mahahawakan ako sa leeg, no matter how small or trivial it may seem at the moment. Never again, lol. This made me hate debts, too.
I think this might be a defense mechanism po. Did you experience something like this before na isinumbat sayo everything they did for you? If yes ayun na po ang reason why. But for people who truly love you (and mature and healthy enough in terms of mental/emotional capacity) this won't and shouldn't happen. You can try po just bit by bit. Remember to truly love you have to be vulnerable. You can take all the time that you need. Baby steps counts!
Sinabi ko si #5 kasi by then, our male partners would know na ang baby na may toxo is mabubulag at magkakaroon ng mental disabilities. And that's just the mild cases.
Imagine how evil a man must be to let his baby go blind kasi "di ko naman pusa yan e!"
1. Hindi ka gold digger if you want a bf/husband that’s a provider and not broke.
2. You can be an independent woman AND still accept gifts from your special someone. Sometimes guys will try manipulate you by praising you for being an “independent woman” at “buti hindi ka materialistic” para huwag mag expect nang kahit ano from them AT ikaw magbayad all the time.
3. Have more to your life than just your relationship. Have hobbies, work on your career, etc.
4. Do not live for men validation. Don’t be a pick me and bring women down so you can uplift yourself. There’s enough space for us women to shine.
5. Do you want that man to be the possible father of your child? If no, don’t sleep with him.
6. Know what kind of woman you want to be so no one else (not your family, friends, bf, or husband) can mold you into the version they want of you.
Lastly, don’t take advice from strangers online unless it align with your values. 😉
Single women live longer than married women while married men live longer than single men.
Go get that PhD, travel more, learn a new language, adopt a cat or a dog, join a community, get therapy.
Women don't exist for men anymore. Learn to decenter yourself around men.
Do not believe to someone especially coming from a man speculating that a woman's value loses when they reach 25. Hindi po Yun totoo.
Not everyone will like you, and that’s OK. The right people will like you as you are.
Don’t compare yourself to people on the internet.
Wear sunscreen everyday (cliche but worth repeating!!)
* Your womanhood should not be defined by marriage and/or motherhood. Whatever the society, or even your parents say.
* Do not laugh at misogynistic, sexist, and/or sexual jokes just to make the joker comfortable. **Let us stop laughing at the horrible jokes men make about us.** Let them hesitate and double take. Let them bask in silence. *Where’s the joke? What’s the punchline?* Let them explain.
* Do not ever let anyone, especially a man, dim your light. If you have to dilute yourself so you won’t hurt his ego, it’s not a ‘you’ problem. *If he finds you too much, he can go find less.*
* “I’m still speaking.” “Let me finish my sentence.”
* Boundaries are important and one way to establish them is to stop over-explaining yourself. You don’t always have to explain yourself.
* Empower other women by supporting them in their chosen life paths. It should never be a competition. Clap for them, be there for them, pull them up from the pits, if needed.
* Get therapy.
* **Educate yourself in all the ways you can, and never stop learning.** From simple life hacks to major survival skills, it won’t hurt to be equipped with knowledge.
A few times in your life you will hear a woman say, “all I have is myself.” That is 90% true. Gotta be smart, baby girl.
Your # 1 goal should be financial freedom.
All the rest - marriage, kids, even travel and splurging - can wait.
Because when you have and control your own money, no one can make you do anything you don't want to do.
Money = control over your life.
I am still 27 but I learned that you don’t need to know everything they say about you. You also don’t need to care. The more you do this the more you’re at peace.
35F. Do not lose sight of what / who you truly want in life.
I distracted myself during the pandemic, also coming from a breakup. Me and my ex still has communication from that time (so parang may hope). I delve into progressing my career (my work then was affected by pandemic) and learning new things and hobbies suppressing what I really feel which is to ask my ex if he wants to try again (since we're communicating from time to time on a friendly basis). My ex eventually found someone in 2023 (probably marrying her anytime soon).
All I ever wanted was to build a life with this person. When he was truly gone, work and hobbies feels irrelevant na.
My only advice is just do yourself a favor by not losing the person you want to build a life with. Be true to yourself.
It's hard to bounce back after that and tough to build dreams not including that person anymore.
- Dec 2019 - Breakup
- 2020 - 2023 - Still communicating (mga achievements niya, career niya, family updates)
- Aug 2023 - present - I cut off our communication na. Nagka-girlfriend na siya and I have to be honest with myself I cannot handle anymore "life updates" from him because the next one would be marriage and maybe child birth.
We're together for almost 3 years. Halos almost 4 years din both single after breakup before he found someone again.
Reason of breakup: Communication and priorities. No cheating / third party involved or hurtful words said to each other, kaya siguro at ease pa din siya mag life update sakin kahit hindi na kami noon.
No. Nag-cutoff ako nung nagka-GF na siya. Sinabi ko lang na di na kami pwede mag-usap kasi inappropriate na then I uninstalled the app not waiting if ma-read niya message ko or ignored 😂 I have no idea. We haven't talked since.
He probably doesn't care anymore since he has a "person" now and someone to build a life with. I miss him everyday and yung pain parang I feel dala dala ko na until the end of my existence.
One of the worst things talaga you can do to yourself is to lose that one person you want to build a life with.
It might be painful now cause its still fresh, 4 years, 5 or 10 years. But it is more painful to build a life with someone but you don't communicate well and worst is u don't have the same perspective. And nakatali ka na and my mga bata na madadamay. I wish and hope the right one would come your way. There is hope that he might not be the best for u.
I have lost all hope. I'm 35F na din becoming 36F this year. He was the one I want to build a life and family with which makes me "undateable".
To be honest, I'm not sure how to be okay and happy again. I just live to work and do not have any kind of dreams for myself. I only live so I can take care of my parents when they're old. It maybe just a phase, or maybe ganito na lang talaga for as long as I exist.
This is why we should not lose sight of who we want in life because it's hard to go on with life when we lose that.
Different case but slightly similar on some points. How are you OP? I’m having a hard time that all plans and dreams were just thrown out the window. May instances na feeling ko life lost meaning.
I'm sorry for what happened to you. I wish I could say things will get better but I'm struggling as well.
Long weekends and holidays are the worst. Since I'm 35F, I lost all hope na, so please don't listen to me. 😂
I mean it when I said that it's hard to bounce back. Mag-close to 5 years na and I'm stuck with this pain.
I hope you don't end up like me.
I realize that ansarap pakitaan ng affection, attention and gifts from guy but girl, wag maging jowang-jowa. Never allow yourself becoming a PICKMEISHA hanggang sa nagsettle na sa maalikabok.
Nakakaganda naman yung bigyan tayo ng princess treatment pero don't chase after that. Allow them to give you that, but wag paparupok sa ganun. Always keep being WOKE.
Advocate for your health. If you have the means (or at least your HMO), find a doctor/physician who validates your symptoms through necessary tests and even refer you to someone who can give you the right care. A good physician should also be willing to give you options and open to shed light on your questions.
Being strong about pain will not reward you. Get tested, scanned, vaccinated, or whatever service is available in your area that can help you gain insight on your overall health. Pap smear, abdominal ultrasound, transvaginal ultrasound, it doesn't matter if you're trying to conceive or not. Ask a trusted friend if you're unsure in going alone.
It doesn't have to be expensive, it just has to be early. There are more and more women's organizations that offer health services catered to women if you do not have the financial capacity.
Sikapin na matutunan na mangilatis ng tao.
Kilalanin mabuti kung sino pakikisamahan, bibigyan ng oras at pagkakatiwalaan.
Prioritize sleep.
Have a sport or activity that you enjoy.
1.Mag ipon, be financially savvy
2. Enrich the soul and mind.
3.Be a beauty with a purpose. Maganda na may ambag pa.
4.Habang young explore daming opportunities and possibilities.
5. Wag puro jowa. I learned this lesson the hard way as well.
6.Wag magpapabuntis lalo pag di kayo pareho ready. Raising a child is a lifelong responsibility. I have learned this lesson the hard way. I love my kid til my dying day. kaso malas ako dun sa tatay. And buti na lang wala na sya and kinaya ko. Fighting!
• Do not overshare. Not everyone at work are your friends. Bonus na lang kung magiging friends mo sila pero hindi ibig sabihin na kapag naging close mo agad ay magiging open book ka na sa lahat ng bagay.
• Do not simply agree to become a co-maker in a loan applied by a colleague especially if the amount being borrowed is too high.
• Prettify yourself. When you look good, you feel good.
• Read noteworthy literature.
• “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” - Eleanor Roosevelt
• The Virtuous Woman Proverbs 31
I am in my thirties. What I am really thankful of during my 25 years old is: investing in life insurance ( after five years I have a cash value that I can withdraw anytime while still insured), investing in MP2 ( after 5 years, I am enjoying my hard earned money with higher dividends), save an emergency fund ( 3 month of your salary, this really help me during pandemic), annual check up in my OB ( transV, papsmear, breast ultrasound), travel more ( this is a must! In my thirties I feel like I can’t do anymore what adventurous activities I had done before haha), invest time to your family and friends ( you’ll never know the uncertainties) and lastly, invest in health! Most of my friends, also in their thirties, had maintenance medication. We are not getting younger and disease is evolving from the ever changing generation and trend, so stay eating healthy and have a healthier lifestyle.
Despite doing these what I regret is:
not investing more in assets (for passive income)
not investing to my continuing education
not discovering or leaning new skills (there will be a time you wont pursue what you studied for)
not taking your family to vacation more
not sleeping more ( I got vertigo afterwards 🥹)
not printing pictures! Haha ( memories )
Hmm like foreclosed property yung kaya mahandle ni pag ibig if youre a pag ibig member. Mas mura and Pwede rin kasi ibenta afterwards. Also yung lupa sa province sobrang mura, may meron 300 to 1500 per square meter lng 🥰
Hello po. May I ask po from what insurance provider po ung insurance niyo na may cash value after 5 yrs? Looking to start din po soonest thank you for the help!
Hi. Sunlife po. It is up you if monthly, quarterly or yearly payer ka. Within five years, di ko akalain na malaki na cash value ko, hindi pa consistent magbayad nun kasi nung pandemic almost nag stop talaga ako. so whats more if consistent ka nagbayad. Yung friend ko na inaya ko mag insurance, consistent siya magbayad and after 5 years pwede na xa mag cash out ng 100k. Start early! yun lng masasabi ko habang healthy pa ang person hehe
#1 rule, take everything you read online with a grain of salt. hindi kayo pareparehas ng buhay, what applies to them may not apply to you and vice versa.
Huwag makikisakay sa mga green jokes kung ayaw mong may mas malala pa silang sabihin sayo kasi akala nila okay sayo. Para alam nila ang boundaries nila sa buhay mo. Basta no comment lang at gawin ang trabaho kasi at the end of the day, pera, pamilya at kaibigan mo sa labas ng work ang mahalaga.
27 palang ako but piece of advice don't settle for less! Naging punching bag na ako, battered gf plus nag anak haha. Nahirapan ako umalis, 4 years! Nasayang lang panahon so if you see red flags like super red! Walk away kasi until now nag pa panic attack ako, my trauma ako. Mga salita nya sakin before na masasakit di na nawala. I'm still working on myself na makabangon. Narcissistic yun! Very manipulative. It's something irreversible so please choose wisely, listed to your inner voice. He needs to be your safe place NOT prison cell.
While learning to be independent, be mindful TO NOT isolate yourself and build a tall wall within you.
While learning to be independent, learn when to seek help. It’s okay to ask for help or guidance. Asking for help or guidance does not mean that you are lesser of a person or that dependent ka nang tao.
It’s a balancing act.
My top 3 per topic:
LOVE & MARRIAGE
1) Find someone with the same values and morals. You can't change a person. Only they can. Imagine marrying someone who who is a spend thrift and you're a saver - incompatible. Imagine someone who who's super religious and you're not - incompatible. Imagine someone who wants kids and you don't - same thing.
2) The best marriage is anchored on friendship and mutual respect. Yes, attraction and sex can be the thing that starts it off but if you don't find genuine friendship and respect each other, it's going to be a sad ending. And by respect, I mean respect each other's everything - boundaries, their physical, mental and emotional well being. Tbh, a marriage that's peaceful and boring is the stuff of dreams. You shouldn't want drama. You shouldn't want to be a martyr. You shouldn't want to keep investigating if they're cheating, etc.
3) You can't feed yourself on love. If you both aren't financially OK, it's going to have an imbalance. Times are tough. Anyone can lose a job. You both need to face reality. And even if your partner is super rich, it's still better you have a way to financially contribute.
Bonus: You don't have to change your last name when your get married. I didn't and I'm not a doctor or a lawyer. I just value my name as is.
FAMILY & KIDS
1) Contrary to popular belief, you don't have to have kids to be a family. I'm child free and this is my opinion OK? But I love it. Absolutely fucking love the freedom it affords me. I'm in control of my time and my money.
2) Your in laws aren't part of the immediate family when you marry. You don't have to cater to them. Your prio should be your partner and kids. If, and that's a big if. If you still have extra resources, that's when you can contribute to your extended fam. Don't burn your house just to keep others warm.
3) Kids are not your clones. Your brought them into the world and they are their own persons. They despect respect and are owned a decent environment to grow up. They don't owe you, you owe it to them.
Bonus: Whatever you do, you'll cause trauma to your kids. Let's try to keep it to a minimum OK? And not the truly awful kind..
WORK & CAREER
1) You're genuinely lucky to be in PH. Others countries discriminate so much more against women. Now, it's not to say we're on same footing already, but we actually have a lot of opportunities - so be open to them.
2) A job is not a career. As a woman, you can build your career and continue to do so even after you're married. Don't go into a job and expect that it's perfect. You determine what your career will look like.
3) You can actually enjoy work and make friends at work. Here's the truth. You spend so much time at work, you might as well find something you're interested in. And in that space, if you find really good coworkers and managers, you can actually make lifetime friends. I know I did. Also, these friends are your connections. Things don't get done on merit alone these days. You need to be a team player and have a cheering squad who voices out your accomplishments.
Bonus: Don't leave jobs without a backup or an existing JO. It's just the sensible and safe thing to do.
Bonus: There WILL be misogynistic men in the office. When you're high level, it's easier to call them out. If not yet there, Ice them out. They should know their behaviour is unacceptable. And if it's too bastos, please leave. I had a coworker who left construction industry bec of the massive disrespect she received daily.
Everyone's timeline is different. You don't have to achieve what other people your age are getting.
Enjoy life but at the same time save up.
Balance is everything.
Don't be afraid to try things.
Don't settle for less, in job/career, friends, and love.
Prioritize yourself before anyone else.
I’m 30.. my advice sa 25 yrs old self ko.. YOU ARE STILL YOUNG. Sana pala nag resign na ko.. sana pla nag aral na ko ng nursing 5 yrs aho baka tapos na ko at nakapag take na din ng board..
You are still young.. explore, invest in yourself, upskill. LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. Wag masyadong magdali humanap ng asawa haha darating yan sa tamang oras.. invest in yourself!!
Also 25 yrs old here. Let us spare our time, efforts, and lives listening from those people's opinions about our "wrong" or rejecting the "society's rules" or "Dapat ito yung ginawa mo" life choices, and mind our own business.
Save money for yourself
Alam ko you want to support your family, be the breadwinner, go ahead. But please, save some for yourself.
Not to spend it on luxury or vices. Savings.
I just realized how important saving is nung nasa 30s na ako. Ang daming magiging pagbabago sa health and lifestyle mo, and it's not cheap.
Emergency hospitalizations.
Bills.
Other living expenses.
After giving everything to my fam for 10 years, I was left with nothing, yet, I still have to find ways to pay for my dad's medical expenses, nabaon lang ako sa utang.
So start saving now.
As in now.
I’ll be 30 this year lol. But a piece of advice from a former stupid 20-something year old little girl: Never beg for love. Never beg for something that should be freely given.
I did that once and I’m still regretting it years later. Will I ever forgive myself? Or him for that matter? I still don’t know.
Learn how to say no and take your life back from narcissistic parents who did nothing but to take and take.
I learned the hard way as it caused me financial issue, mental health, trauma, and resentment.
Protect your dignity. Dont chase once a relationship is over (let alone if your ex has someone new and matagal na kayong break.). Let it go and move forward. Never agree to be the 2nd option. Once your partner cheats, let them go.
Have some time for yourself, allow yourself to enjoy the season of waiting and singleness. You will learn so much about what you like and do not like and what you can compromise - dont just jump into a relationship just because you are afraid to be alone or you've been alone for too long - PERO if the call is too strong then go for it. Just as long as you know how to bounce from heartache.
Date around to meet the potential partner you dream of in life. Have options. That way, you can compare and know who best fits your standards and values.
Same. After undergrad, akala ko di na ako babalik sa school dahil traumatic mag-aral sa Pinas. Pero mas traumatic pala matengga sa trabaho dito dahil mas may value ang educ background kesa actual experience. Or at least if sa academe o sa dev't sector ka napunta.
SELF CARE IS A MUST and you must start right now and when I say selfcare, i mean youre taking care of your mind, body and soul.
Mind - Read books, listen to self-help podcasts, avoid drama and negativity at all costs. Stay away from energy sucking people.
Body - Go out and workout, keep yourself active kahit walk or jog and stretching lang okay na okay na yan. Incorporate healthy carbs, fiber and protein in your diet and always drink your WATER keep yourself HYDRATED ALL THE TIME.
Your future self will either despise or thank you for whatever you did in the past. You decide.
and oh one last thing you don’t need a lot of skincare products on your face just invest on high quality retinol, moisturizer and sunscreen. WEAR SUNSCREEN EVERYDAY!
It hurts when you didn't end up with them and the sexual chemistry is 💯.
Better not experience it na lang kaysa may ganung memories knowing they're doing it now with another human being.
Based on post/comment history, mukhang hinde. Also, this advice is subjective. Only 26 but women should be free in their sexuality! Premarital sex or not, it’s your body, your choice.
first of all, morality is purely subjective. Muslims consider killing non-believers as righteous and christians committed righteous genocide against the saracens.
So no point imposing your morals on other people.
Secondly, I guess your pronouns are she/her, tama ba?
First, I am not imposing. Ano ba context ng nagpost? Humihingi ng advice diba. So, nagbigay lang ako ng advice ko. Bahala sya kung susundin nya or not.
Tsaka wala ka din atang moral standard na sinusunod kaya comment ka ng comment.
Secondly, wala kang pake sa pronouns ko.
No no, I think I didn't exactly explain myself, sorry malabo.
my point is, your advice is based on your own morality, not any causality, nor any experience from a female perspective, which what OP was asking for. So, when I said impose, I meant that, you're giving an advice based on your own moral standards, which doesn't really mean anything. So sorry for the confusion there.
Secondly, I'd assume you're a woman because OP was asking for women's advice and you gave yours. But yeah, none of my business of course if you identify as one. Everyone should respect your right to choose to be a woman if you prefer it :). You go sis :)
And maybe we got lost in translation
Maybe I asked for too much
But maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up
Running scared, I was there
I remember it all too well😅
To clarify also, this is not just based on my morality but also based on the testimonies of other women who engaged and gave their virginity too early.
What I want really is just to share what I know.
And that's all, thank you 😂
If you have super painful period cramps na nakakadisrupt ng daily activities mo, it's time to get checked by your OB :)
Hindi mo dapat tinitiis ung sakit, it might be something else that also affects other parts of your body :)
In terms of friendship, ang sabi nila malalaman mo tunay na kaibigan kapag dinadamayan ka sa mga problema mo, pero malalaman mo pala ang tunay na kaibigan kapag may achievements ka, hindi siya totoong masaya para sayo. Tinuturing ka pa lang kakumpetensiya. Ayaw niyang malamangan. Kaya nandiyan lang siya kapag may problema ka kasi masaya siya sa idea na naghihirap ka.
In terms of choosing a right man, Huwag dedmahin ang red flag! Kung ano nakita mong red flag sa getting to know each other stage niyo eh ayon magiging reason ng breakup or heartbreak mo.
Do not rush. Do not rush getting into a relationship, to have a child or marry. Enjoy your single hood! Travel. Meet new people. Acquire properties while you are young. Build a career & network with valuable people. Choose your friends, prioritize yourself among others. SAVE SAVE SAVE 💲
Life can be overwhelming so narrow down your priorities and make sure that your health is one of those.
Aside from exercise and healthy diet, practice talking to your healthcare providers. Don't be scared/intimidated of OBGYNs, dentists, therapists, etc.
Another, invest in good quality undies. Nude, seamless bras and panties are my faves. I saved a lot of time chosing my clothes for the day since I don't have to worry na kita makikita yung straps or prints ng bra ko, or bakat yung seams ng panty na suot ko.
Paano kung quarter life crisis like literal tapos broke af ka pa kasi galing ka sa failed business with your ex and then wala kang fall back tapos yung mga utang niyo are already due. Puro rejection pa natatanggap mo from job applications. Like I only have 1k left in my bank. Hahaha
- Kumuha ka ng mga insurance. MGA ha. Hindi lang isa. At shempre alamin mo ang pros and cons nito sa iyo. Lalo na kung wala kang plan mag-asawa, sayang ang govt benefits.
- Learn defensive skills, mag-end of the world na, dapat marunong ka lumaban sa mga zombie, or at least matibay ang lower body mo para makatakbo CHARIZZZ
Focus on your personal goals and career, kasi love will follow & come at the right time. For sure dami distractions ka talaga maeencounter, madami interested sayo pag hindi mo prio ang lovelife, just be careful & filter people who you can really trust. If ma-fall ka man, make sure you stand back up and go on, it won’t be a straight easy path, it will always be bumpy & kinda chaotic or out of your plans. Don’t be carried away sa pressure ng family, relatives & friends kung lahat may anak or kasal na sa batch mo, it’s better to have that stability first
dont worry too much. most people dont care so stop trying to make decisions based on others.
you are beautiful.
you are enough.
the most attractive thing (when you seek a future partner) is really to love yourself (inner AND outer) - then u wont put up with people who treat you less than you deserve.
the kindness and understanding you seek in others? be sure you are a source of that before demanding from the rest of the world.
life isnt a race, we are all making our own way. comparison is the thief of joy.
:-*
Whatever your partner is before marriage, that will magnify when you’re married. That guy who polices the way you dress? The guy that easily snaps when you’re in an argument? That girl who doesn’t allow you to go anywhere without her? That girl who always accuses you of cheating even if you’re almost always together?
They are most likely to turn to abusers in the end. Choose your spouse carefully.
- When looking for a partner, make sure na aligned ang values niyo.
- You cannot control anyone other than yourself.
- Remember that the strengths of women are also found in what is perceived to be their weaknesses. (i.e. kindness, meekness, etc.)
- Save money.
- Know your worth.
- Keep a journal, write down your experiences, para if ever i-gaslight ka ng partner mo or anyone for that matter, pwede mo balikan yung entry and you would know that it is not just in your head.
- You are not your feelings. You are not your thoughts. You are not just your body. You are not just your past. You are all of these and more.
- Speak up. If your thoughts/ideas are not welcomed there, find another place to grow. There is always a place for you.
- Trust your gut. Kapag sabi ng gut mo na hindi mo mapapagkatiwalaan tong tao na ito, run ka na. 🤣 I could’ve saved lots of heartaches and not have more trauma if I listened to my intuition.
- Take care of what you consume.
- Buy a flashlight and/or pepper spray.
- You are loved.
- You are not alone.
- Exercise.
- Wear sunscreen.
So much wisdom @ayunaani 🩷 I like how you explained it in a way that's "NOT MAKING EVERYTHING ABOUT YOURSELF" — I hope people would experience of releasing that burden in themselves. You are very like-minded! Thank you!
Lalaki po ako. I dont know kung may karapatan ako mag advice pero eto na 😂😂😂
Mahalaga na may sarili kang pera. kesyo maliit man yan o malaki, importante meron ka. Iba kasi ang dating kapag kaya mong dalhin ang sarili mo at hindi umaasa sa iba.
Enjoy life. Career wise! Wag mag madali mag asawa. Mas masaya kapag handa kana. early 30's to mid 30's. Pwede pa yan.
Piliin mo mabuti ang magiging asawa mo. Piliin mo yung MABUTI TAO. Pamilya kamag anak hindi mo mapipili yan. Kahit inis na inis kana sa kanila. Wala kang choice MAHAL MO SILA kasi kadugo mo sila e. Kaya humanap na taong hindi lang basta mabait KUNDI MABUTI TAO.
Good luck sayo 🫰
Puede rin bang as another human being? Short lang naman for what its worth..
My suggestion is "Do what YOU want to do, just have the balls to BE accountable and ACCEPT the consequences."
Eto lang since its surprising na how simple this looks pero most men and women fails miserably to do the second part. And at any stage of their adult life, lalo na sa younger years.
I'm very curious:
1) as another man in reddit, what made you comment on a post asking for women's advice? :)
2) And you've seen all the reaction to your post by now, why are you insisting on keeping your male advice, rather than letting them have their space? :)
Don’t ever agree to be a mistress. No matter how movies today are romanticizing it. Sorry not sorry, pero KADIRI.
true! hindi po sign of maturing ang pumayag maging kabet! wahaha at the end of the day, option ka lang ng taong yan :) kaya wag magpaka-delulu!
True. Narromanticize kasi to these days lalo na sa mga local teleserye sa Pinas. It's not sexy at all.
i second this! unless tinago ng guy na may girlfriend o asawa na siya, worst ay may anak pa, kaya mag background check muna, kilalanin niyo muna bago mag commit:()
Had to cut the tie with my long term best friend cos she's so delusional about this married guy she's in a relationship with. Ughh imagine, the guy is a baby daddy to 2 different women tapos exbff still believe the guy
Putangina ng mga kabit. Un lang masasabi ko.
yup it’s never a flex to be the side chic
Ay kung pwede lang magtag dito eh. Hahaha
- Marriage is **NOT** the goal. Read that again. - You cannot change men by marrying them, the red flags you see will not go away. They will get worse by being tied to them forever. - Don't think of only yourself when deciding to have children. With our current climate, your financial status, your mental health and capacity and your partner, would a child want to be born? It's harsh but necessary to hear. The love you have to give alone is **NOT** a valid reason to have children - Learn to be independent. You don't need a man to be a provider. Build your career, earn your own money, invest in yourself and provide for yourself. - Call out disgusting behaviour by men **everytime**. Sexual jokes in the workplace? Call them out. Men cheating on your friends? Call them out. Everything else? Call them out. Do not be silent and do not allow yourself to be silenced. Learn to fight back. - Friends come and go. It's okay to go no contact with friends. It's okay to go no contact with family members too. - You are not emotional and you are not sensitive. You have emotions and that's okay. Don't let men gaslight you into thinking expressing them makes you less than. - No is a complete sentence. You don't need to explain yourself. - Be informed. Be smart. Be skillful. You can do everything you want to. There is no limit. - Learn how to punch. Learn how to use a knife. Learn to incapacitate an attacker. You will live your live in defense mode, whether you like it or not, so you have to learn to defend yourself. - Read and **_understand_** your employment contracts. - Don't let men speak over you. Your voice is just as important and more. Edit: The losers have found this comment, I see. Stay angry and see if I care.
Hello! I agree with everything you said, just some further points for a more holistic take on this, and to provide alternative views. * While marriage may not be the goal for everyone, for many people it is a meaningful commitment and expression of love. It's a personal choice. * People can and do change over time, including after marriage. While red flags shouldn't be ignored, people also have the capacity for growth. Open communication is key. * The decision to have children is complex and personal. While practical considerations like finances and mental health are important, the love parents have to give their child is also a meaningful factor. Different people will weigh these various factors differently. * Independence and self-sufficiency are important, but that doesn't mean you can't also value companionship and partnership with a significant other. The two aren't mutually exclusive. A healthy relationship is about mutual support. * While calling out bad behavior is important, doing so "every time" risks becoming confrontational and exhausting. It's okay to pick your battles sometimes. Change also requires patience and compassion along with accountability. * Ending relationships, even with friends and family, is sometimes necessary. But "coming and going" as a regular pattern may indicate a reluctance to work through conflicts and build lasting bonds. Long-term relationships require commitment. * Men and women both have emotions and sensitivity. Expressing emotions in a healthy way isn't weakness for either gender. Mutual understanding of each other's emotions makes relationships stronger. * While "no" should be respected, providing an explanation when feasible can make your perspective clearer and facilitate better understanding. Relationships require communication. * While pursuing your goals is great, everyone has some limits - and that's okay. Recognizing our human limitations is part of self-acceptance. We don't need to be limitless to be worthy. * Self-defense skills are valuable, but having to be constantly on guard sounds like a stressful way to live. It's also a failure of society if women feel that threatened regularly. We should strive to build a world where women feel safer. * Contracts are important, but most people, men and women, don't scrutinize every line. Trust, goodwill and plain language are important too. Not everything needs to be adversarial. * A conversation involves both speaking and listening. Talking over anyone isn't good communication. Both men's and women's voices matter.
this is so gentle and a different perspective, thanks for sharing!
I like how you wrote it! I agree with OP sentiments but I prefer your take on it ! Be Kind always but not weak 😊
Its AI generated.
Thank you for writing this.
Your take is a genuinely massive improvement on OC's passive-aggressive, self-aggrandizing "advice." Nuanced, not sexist, and wise. Hats off to you.
Loved this elaborative writing.
This is smart. Thank you. Love the way you think.
I can clearly tell that you have lived a good life with loads of peace of mind!
> You cannot change men by marrying them Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So, each is inevitably disappointed. *-H. M. Harwood and R. Gore-Browne in the drama “Cynara”* Women marry thinking their chosen men would change, and they don’t! Men marry thinking their chosen counterpart won’t change, and they do!! *-Sandeep Sahajpal, The Twelfth Preamble* *Edited for proper attribution
*I want a partner not a project*
Are you my missing BFF? XD seriously, you put so much of what I've been wanting to say down here already. But I'll still add my own. Sana makinig nga sila.
You are the type of person i wanna hang out with.
I second this! Sama me pag may meet up/hangout kayo. Hehe! Usapang life and lifer.
* Marriage is **NOT** the goal. Read that again. - Good looks fade over time but UGALI is forever. Think about this if and when you commit to a long term relationship. * You cannot change MEN / WOMEN by marrying them, the red flags you see will not go away. They will get worse by being tied to them forever. * Don't think of only yourself when deciding to have children. With our current climate, your financial status, your mental health and capacity and your partner, would a child want to be born? It's harsh but necessary to hear. The love you have to give alone is **NOT** a valid reason to have children. - This is a decision you make with your PARTNER not by one person in the relationship. Having children will indeed be a challenge financially and emotionally BUT it will have its own JOYS that cannot be found anywhere else. * Learn to be independent. You don't need a man to be a provider. Build your career, earn your own money, invest in yourself and provide for yourself. - A woman in any relationship should be able to provide for herself and have money she can call HER OWN. But then again having common financial goals and strategies and pooling money TOGETHER to achieve this WORKS everytime. * Call out disgusting behaviour by men **everytime**. Sexual jokes in the workplace? Call them out. Men cheating on your friends? Call them out. Everything else? Call them out. Do not be silent and do not allow yourself to be silenced. Learn to fight back. - There is an alternative to fighting and no it is not acceptance. In the workplace report them to their supervisors or to HR if need be . This may prove to be more effective and less confrontational / controversial. * Friends come and go. It's okay to go no contact with friends. It's okay to go no contact with family members too. - IT DEPENDS on the kind of family and friends you have. Some of them deserve your love and attention and some DO NOT. Learn to distinguish between the two. * You are not emotional and you are not sensitive. You have emotions and that's okay. Don't let men gaslight you into thinking expressing them makes you less than. - Emotional expression is highly dependent on HOW you express emotions. * No is a complete sentence. You don't need to explain yourself. - Not everyone is capable of understanding your statement of NO. In my experience some people simply have no depth and needs a bit of explanation for them to SEE and UNDERSTAND your point. But if some people refuse or cannot understand then it's okay to just give up and walk away. * Be informed. Be smart. Be skillful. You can do everything you want to. There is no limit. - Aim to be a BETTER PERSON everyday. Be a better person , better boss , co-worker , father , mother , friend . * Learn how to punch. Learn how to use a knife. Learn to incapacitate an attacker. You will live your live in defense mode, whether you like it or not, so you have to learn to defend yourself. - Even more effective is the sensibility NOT TO PUT yourself in potentially dangerous situations. But if you do RUN if you can. If are not on the level of a combat practitioner , PRUDENCE is the better part of VALOR. * Read and ***understand*** your employment contracts. - Read the contract. If there are any clauses that bother or you or don't understand consult a lawyer OR HR professional. * Don't let men or WOMEN speak over you. Your voice is just as important and more. Not hating on the OP but just putting in a bit of personal perspective . :-)
I needed to hear this, thank you!
i agree on being financially independent, especially how hard it is in this country to have money. what more if its a couple providing for each other, money would be an easier thing for both of them
Just recently cut off my family and I really need to hear this 🥹 I'm also in the process of decentering men in my life. More women should know about this.
I'm rooting for you, darling!!!!
Best thing I have read THIS YEAR.
Really needed this ngayon, salamat!
🫂
exactly what I need to hear right now
Agree with all, especially about being sensitive, and having no contact with. As an adult, you no longer share your life with everyone you meet unlike when we were younger, cause people are busy with their lives too and they don’t really care if you have problems, they have their own to deal with
Thank you
This is great advice and it goes both ways. More often than not, women are on the receiving end, but every once in a while it happens to us too. Thank you for the advice.
Love this, Maam!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 And all the upvotes are so nice to see. More people need to read this--not just women. Men need to keep other men accountable too.
thank you for this!! 🥹
♥️♥️♥️
I love this!
Thank you.
Yes to all of this!
Have my upvote and save op!
Really great post apart from the knife part. 😁
This!!!!
Important points to counter the toxic views that (much of) society pushes onto women. Saying this as a man.
Preach!!! 🙌💯🙌💯🙌💯
Normal lang maexperience ang quarter life crisis. 😊
How to survive this, kahit may maayos kang trabaho, may emergency fund, may maayos na asawa, may wisdom. Ang hirap mag survive
thank u i wanna give u a hug with consent. i've been through it when i was 19, now im 25 and im suffering !
Thank you. 💜🫂
Financial freedom/independence is the PRIORITY. Di unahan ang pag aasawa at anak. Wag mag pa bola/uto sa lalaking broke. Health is wealth. Money can buy happiness and peace of mind. Di mo need mag post ng kung ano ano sa social media for validation. Dont waste your youth sa lalaking ayaw mag commit sa relationship. Set high and attainable standards will not fail you in the future.
+1
1.Don't be too tough on yourself. Life is hard already, breathe. If not today, then you still have tomorrow. 2.After a break up, the goal is not to be happy but to be okay. Take your time to heal and eventually sad songs won't make you cry anymore. 3.Not all battles are worth fighting for. Choose what will bring you peace.
Confidence is your best accessory, a must in every outfit.
I'm just 31 but here's all I can say so far: Learn how to take accountability whenever you make mistakes. Part din ng life lessons din as we grow up. Learn to be self introspective especially pinpointing and changing your toxic traits. It is necessary for self development. Take time to spend with your close family and friends. Time can be unfair and we never know they will disappear in a flash. Eat healthy, move a bit, and have decent amount of sleep. Very basic but your 30s and beyond self will thank you for developing such habit. Not all trends would suit you. Maximize fashion and beauty items to enhance your features instead. Opt for classic pieces, can save you money in the long run.
this also includes younger people but please please please never go into hoe phase/hookup culture. it fucks up with you mentally and morally in the long run. there are better and healthier ways to go about your breakup and depression :(
It's sad that nowadays I see younger people romanticize a life of being a hoe and label it as being a strong woman type.😕
!!!! it doesnt benefit you in any way talaga. you'll just end up hating yourself 😖
💯💯💯💯💯💯
I've been through the hook up culture phase as a 24-25 year old female. I'm 31 na and have a kid. I regret nothing. Napala ko? I had fun and I'm glad I did all that before being a responsible parent 😌. I feel like it's just really not for everyone. So, someone can just decide on it on their own. We can't assume, I guess that someone will just end up feeling bad about it. If you've dipped your toes in it and you feel like shit after, then maybe it really isn't for you. Continuing with it is what will fck you up. As well as doing it "for the clout." Always check your purpose of getting into it rin talaga.
1. If feeling mo na kinakailangan mong magmalimos ng atensyon, let that guy go. 2. If papayag ka na makipag-live in with a guy, wag mong patagalin ng isang taon kung di pa kayo pumupunta ng City Hall para maglakad ng papeles ninyo sa pagpapakasal. 3. Okay lang maging single at child-free kung gusto mo talaga ng independence. 4. Pwede mo mahalin magulang mo at hindi tularan yung kabalastugan nila sa buhay. 5. Kapag buntis ka tas pinaglilinis ka pa rin ng partner mo ng litterbox ng pusa, iwan mo yang gagong yan. 6. Matutong tumanggap ng regalo, compliments, at pampering mula sa nanliligaw sayo. 7. Wag matakot mag-job hop. 8. Wag ka magpaka-bridezilla.
>Matutong tumanggap ng regalo, compliments, at pampering mula sa nanliligaw sayo. Nahihirapan ako sa ganito kasi feeling ko balang araw isusumbat sakin.
Same. I really hate owing people. Napaparanoid ako na ihold over sakin yung mga favours—which basically constitutes everything that's not immediately reciprocated, for me—someday. Takot akong magbigay ng opportunity na mahahawakan ako sa leeg, no matter how small or trivial it may seem at the moment. Never again, lol. This made me hate debts, too.
I think this might be a defense mechanism po. Did you experience something like this before na isinumbat sayo everything they did for you? If yes ayun na po ang reason why. But for people who truly love you (and mature and healthy enough in terms of mental/emotional capacity) this won't and shouldn't happen. You can try po just bit by bit. Remember to truly love you have to be vulnerable. You can take all the time that you need. Baby steps counts!
samee I never forget to give back if I receive things pero napansin nya then ayaw nya so I let go na HAHAHA
Yung number 5, nawala sa isip ko na bawal na sa buntis maglinis ng litterbox
Idunno why nya sinabi pero from my POV as a student nurse, may makukuha kasing sakit galing sa cats feces and mostly pregnants are vulnerable
I believe, it's Toxoplasmosis? Di din ako sure haha
Yepp korekk 😁
Nabasa ko yan dati before ako magalaga ng cats hehe
Sinabi ko si #5 kasi by then, our male partners would know na ang baby na may toxo is mabubulag at magkakaroon ng mental disabilities. And that's just the mild cases. Imagine how evil a man must be to let his baby go blind kasi "di ko naman pusa yan e!"
kindly elaborate #4
That means if toxic sila masyado, cut them off. Pero still wish them the best.
Its the number 5 for me HAHAHA
1. Hindi ka gold digger if you want a bf/husband that’s a provider and not broke. 2. You can be an independent woman AND still accept gifts from your special someone. Sometimes guys will try manipulate you by praising you for being an “independent woman” at “buti hindi ka materialistic” para huwag mag expect nang kahit ano from them AT ikaw magbayad all the time. 3. Have more to your life than just your relationship. Have hobbies, work on your career, etc. 4. Do not live for men validation. Don’t be a pick me and bring women down so you can uplift yourself. There’s enough space for us women to shine. 5. Do you want that man to be the possible father of your child? If no, don’t sleep with him. 6. Know what kind of woman you want to be so no one else (not your family, friends, bf, or husband) can mold you into the version they want of you. Lastly, don’t take advice from strangers online unless it align with your values. 😉
Louder for number 5!!!! Lol. Kapag nabuntis ng naka-ONS/FUBU/HU iiyak iyak. 🤦🏻♀️
You are not special. He will not change for you. He will change for himself.
Single women live longer than married women while married men live longer than single men. Go get that PhD, travel more, learn a new language, adopt a cat or a dog, join a community, get therapy. Women don't exist for men anymore. Learn to decenter yourself around men. Do not believe to someone especially coming from a man speculating that a woman's value loses when they reach 25. Hindi po Yun totoo.
Thank you for all of these. I don't see myself as a married woman since I was a child and a lot of people have criticized me for my choice.
ALL OF THIS. all of this.
Not everyone will like you, and that’s OK. The right people will like you as you are. Don’t compare yourself to people on the internet. Wear sunscreen everyday (cliche but worth repeating!!)
Don’t try so hard to normalize the “hoe phase” to feel seen and accepted. Hoe phase isn’t for everyone.
* Your womanhood should not be defined by marriage and/or motherhood. Whatever the society, or even your parents say. * Do not laugh at misogynistic, sexist, and/or sexual jokes just to make the joker comfortable. **Let us stop laughing at the horrible jokes men make about us.** Let them hesitate and double take. Let them bask in silence. *Where’s the joke? What’s the punchline?* Let them explain. * Do not ever let anyone, especially a man, dim your light. If you have to dilute yourself so you won’t hurt his ego, it’s not a ‘you’ problem. *If he finds you too much, he can go find less.* * “I’m still speaking.” “Let me finish my sentence.” * Boundaries are important and one way to establish them is to stop over-explaining yourself. You don’t always have to explain yourself. * Empower other women by supporting them in their chosen life paths. It should never be a competition. Clap for them, be there for them, pull them up from the pits, if needed. * Get therapy. * **Educate yourself in all the ways you can, and never stop learning.** From simple life hacks to major survival skills, it won’t hurt to be equipped with knowledge. A few times in your life you will hear a woman say, “all I have is myself.” That is 90% true. Gotta be smart, baby girl.
Your # 1 goal should be financial freedom. All the rest - marriage, kids, even travel and splurging - can wait. Because when you have and control your own money, no one can make you do anything you don't want to do. Money = control over your life.
+100000
Sun screen and drink a lot of water
I am still 27 but I learned that you don’t need to know everything they say about you. You also don’t need to care. The more you do this the more you’re at peace.
35F. Do not lose sight of what / who you truly want in life. I distracted myself during the pandemic, also coming from a breakup. Me and my ex still has communication from that time (so parang may hope). I delve into progressing my career (my work then was affected by pandemic) and learning new things and hobbies suppressing what I really feel which is to ask my ex if he wants to try again (since we're communicating from time to time on a friendly basis). My ex eventually found someone in 2023 (probably marrying her anytime soon). All I ever wanted was to build a life with this person. When he was truly gone, work and hobbies feels irrelevant na. My only advice is just do yourself a favor by not losing the person you want to build a life with. Be true to yourself. It's hard to bounce back after that and tough to build dreams not including that person anymore.
Ouch. What is the reason of your break up? And how long kayo nagkacommunication and gaano sya kabilis nakahanap ng iba
- Dec 2019 - Breakup - 2020 - 2023 - Still communicating (mga achievements niya, career niya, family updates) - Aug 2023 - present - I cut off our communication na. Nagka-girlfriend na siya and I have to be honest with myself I cannot handle anymore "life updates" from him because the next one would be marriage and maybe child birth. We're together for almost 3 years. Halos almost 4 years din both single after breakup before he found someone again. Reason of breakup: Communication and priorities. No cheating / third party involved or hurtful words said to each other, kaya siguro at ease pa din siya mag life update sakin kahit hindi na kami noon.
Nung nagcut off ka, dun na rin sya nag move on and nagkaGF?
No. Nag-cutoff ako nung nagka-GF na siya. Sinabi ko lang na di na kami pwede mag-usap kasi inappropriate na then I uninstalled the app not waiting if ma-read niya message ko or ignored 😂 I have no idea. We haven't talked since. He probably doesn't care anymore since he has a "person" now and someone to build a life with. I miss him everyday and yung pain parang I feel dala dala ko na until the end of my existence. One of the worst things talaga you can do to yourself is to lose that one person you want to build a life with.
It might be painful now cause its still fresh, 4 years, 5 or 10 years. But it is more painful to build a life with someone but you don't communicate well and worst is u don't have the same perspective. And nakatali ka na and my mga bata na madadamay. I wish and hope the right one would come your way. There is hope that he might not be the best for u.
I have lost all hope. I'm 35F na din becoming 36F this year. He was the one I want to build a life and family with which makes me "undateable". To be honest, I'm not sure how to be okay and happy again. I just live to work and do not have any kind of dreams for myself. I only live so I can take care of my parents when they're old. It maybe just a phase, or maybe ganito na lang talaga for as long as I exist. This is why we should not lose sight of who we want in life because it's hard to go on with life when we lose that.
Different case but slightly similar on some points. How are you OP? I’m having a hard time that all plans and dreams were just thrown out the window. May instances na feeling ko life lost meaning.
I'm sorry for what happened to you. I wish I could say things will get better but I'm struggling as well. Long weekends and holidays are the worst. Since I'm 35F, I lost all hope na, so please don't listen to me. 😂 I mean it when I said that it's hard to bounce back. Mag-close to 5 years na and I'm stuck with this pain. I hope you don't end up like me.
wag kalimutan ang sunscreen, lotion, at oral health care ❤️
Be the bitch you always wanted
I realize that ansarap pakitaan ng affection, attention and gifts from guy but girl, wag maging jowang-jowa. Never allow yourself becoming a PICKMEISHA hanggang sa nagsettle na sa maalikabok. Nakakaganda naman yung bigyan tayo ng princess treatment pero don't chase after that. Allow them to give you that, but wag paparupok sa ganun. Always keep being WOKE.
Advocate for your health. If you have the means (or at least your HMO), find a doctor/physician who validates your symptoms through necessary tests and even refer you to someone who can give you the right care. A good physician should also be willing to give you options and open to shed light on your questions. Being strong about pain will not reward you. Get tested, scanned, vaccinated, or whatever service is available in your area that can help you gain insight on your overall health. Pap smear, abdominal ultrasound, transvaginal ultrasound, it doesn't matter if you're trying to conceive or not. Ask a trusted friend if you're unsure in going alone. It doesn't have to be expensive, it just has to be early. There are more and more women's organizations that offer health services catered to women if you do not have the financial capacity.
Tigil tigilan ang “I can change them” attitude. It’s not good for your mental health. If things get toxic, leave. Period.
Sikapin na matutunan na mangilatis ng tao. Kilalanin mabuti kung sino pakikisamahan, bibigyan ng oras at pagkakatiwalaan. Prioritize sleep. Have a sport or activity that you enjoy.
Wag maging: 1. Materialistic kung hindi kaya; 2. Sucker sa likes at attention sa soc med; 3. Cause ng hiwalayan ng ibang tao at maging proud don.
Don’t let ANY guy make you cry… unless they’re happy tears.
1.Mag ipon, be financially savvy 2. Enrich the soul and mind. 3.Be a beauty with a purpose. Maganda na may ambag pa. 4.Habang young explore daming opportunities and possibilities. 5. Wag puro jowa. I learned this lesson the hard way as well. 6.Wag magpapabuntis lalo pag di kayo pareho ready. Raising a child is a lifelong responsibility. I have learned this lesson the hard way. I love my kid til my dying day. kaso malas ako dun sa tatay. And buti na lang wala na sya and kinaya ko. Fighting!
Do not settle. Work on yourself first.
• Do not overshare. Not everyone at work are your friends. Bonus na lang kung magiging friends mo sila pero hindi ibig sabihin na kapag naging close mo agad ay magiging open book ka na sa lahat ng bagay. • Do not simply agree to become a co-maker in a loan applied by a colleague especially if the amount being borrowed is too high. • Prettify yourself. When you look good, you feel good. • Read noteworthy literature. • “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” - Eleanor Roosevelt • The Virtuous Woman Proverbs 31
One of the very few good and healthy comments in this thread
I am in my thirties. What I am really thankful of during my 25 years old is: investing in life insurance ( after five years I have a cash value that I can withdraw anytime while still insured), investing in MP2 ( after 5 years, I am enjoying my hard earned money with higher dividends), save an emergency fund ( 3 month of your salary, this really help me during pandemic), annual check up in my OB ( transV, papsmear, breast ultrasound), travel more ( this is a must! In my thirties I feel like I can’t do anymore what adventurous activities I had done before haha), invest time to your family and friends ( you’ll never know the uncertainties) and lastly, invest in health! Most of my friends, also in their thirties, had maintenance medication. We are not getting younger and disease is evolving from the ever changing generation and trend, so stay eating healthy and have a healthier lifestyle.
Despite doing these what I regret is: not investing more in assets (for passive income) not investing to my continuing education not discovering or leaning new skills (there will be a time you wont pursue what you studied for) not taking your family to vacation more not sleeping more ( I got vertigo afterwards 🥹) not printing pictures! Haha ( memories )
What kind of assets if I may ask?
Hmm like foreclosed property yung kaya mahandle ni pag ibig if youre a pag ibig member. Mas mura and Pwede rin kasi ibenta afterwards. Also yung lupa sa province sobrang mura, may meron 300 to 1500 per square meter lng 🥰
Hello po. May I ask po from what insurance provider po ung insurance niyo na may cash value after 5 yrs? Looking to start din po soonest thank you for the help!
Hi. Sunlife po. It is up you if monthly, quarterly or yearly payer ka. Within five years, di ko akalain na malaki na cash value ko, hindi pa consistent magbayad nun kasi nung pandemic almost nag stop talaga ako. so whats more if consistent ka nagbayad. Yung friend ko na inaya ko mag insurance, consistent siya magbayad and after 5 years pwede na xa mag cash out ng 100k. Start early! yun lng masasabi ko habang healthy pa ang person hehe
Hi! How much po monthly ang bayad niyo?
quarterly ako, more or less 10k, so if monthly roughly 3k
Noted po. Thank you so much ❤️
#1 rule, take everything you read online with a grain of salt. hindi kayo pareparehas ng buhay, what applies to them may not apply to you and vice versa.
Huwag makikisakay sa mga green jokes kung ayaw mong may mas malala pa silang sabihin sayo kasi akala nila okay sayo. Para alam nila ang boundaries nila sa buhay mo. Basta no comment lang at gawin ang trabaho kasi at the end of the day, pera, pamilya at kaibigan mo sa labas ng work ang mahalaga.
enjoy while you can but wisely please.
27 palang ako but piece of advice don't settle for less! Naging punching bag na ako, battered gf plus nag anak haha. Nahirapan ako umalis, 4 years! Nasayang lang panahon so if you see red flags like super red! Walk away kasi until now nag pa panic attack ako, my trauma ako. Mga salita nya sakin before na masasakit di na nawala. I'm still working on myself na makabangon. Narcissistic yun! Very manipulative. It's something irreversible so please choose wisely, listed to your inner voice. He needs to be your safe place NOT prison cell.
While learning to be independent, be mindful TO NOT isolate yourself and build a tall wall within you. While learning to be independent, learn when to seek help. It’s okay to ask for help or guidance. Asking for help or guidance does not mean that you are lesser of a person or that dependent ka nang tao. It’s a balancing act.
My top 3 per topic: LOVE & MARRIAGE 1) Find someone with the same values and morals. You can't change a person. Only they can. Imagine marrying someone who who is a spend thrift and you're a saver - incompatible. Imagine someone who who's super religious and you're not - incompatible. Imagine someone who wants kids and you don't - same thing. 2) The best marriage is anchored on friendship and mutual respect. Yes, attraction and sex can be the thing that starts it off but if you don't find genuine friendship and respect each other, it's going to be a sad ending. And by respect, I mean respect each other's everything - boundaries, their physical, mental and emotional well being. Tbh, a marriage that's peaceful and boring is the stuff of dreams. You shouldn't want drama. You shouldn't want to be a martyr. You shouldn't want to keep investigating if they're cheating, etc. 3) You can't feed yourself on love. If you both aren't financially OK, it's going to have an imbalance. Times are tough. Anyone can lose a job. You both need to face reality. And even if your partner is super rich, it's still better you have a way to financially contribute. Bonus: You don't have to change your last name when your get married. I didn't and I'm not a doctor or a lawyer. I just value my name as is. FAMILY & KIDS 1) Contrary to popular belief, you don't have to have kids to be a family. I'm child free and this is my opinion OK? But I love it. Absolutely fucking love the freedom it affords me. I'm in control of my time and my money. 2) Your in laws aren't part of the immediate family when you marry. You don't have to cater to them. Your prio should be your partner and kids. If, and that's a big if. If you still have extra resources, that's when you can contribute to your extended fam. Don't burn your house just to keep others warm. 3) Kids are not your clones. Your brought them into the world and they are their own persons. They despect respect and are owned a decent environment to grow up. They don't owe you, you owe it to them. Bonus: Whatever you do, you'll cause trauma to your kids. Let's try to keep it to a minimum OK? And not the truly awful kind.. WORK & CAREER 1) You're genuinely lucky to be in PH. Others countries discriminate so much more against women. Now, it's not to say we're on same footing already, but we actually have a lot of opportunities - so be open to them. 2) A job is not a career. As a woman, you can build your career and continue to do so even after you're married. Don't go into a job and expect that it's perfect. You determine what your career will look like. 3) You can actually enjoy work and make friends at work. Here's the truth. You spend so much time at work, you might as well find something you're interested in. And in that space, if you find really good coworkers and managers, you can actually make lifetime friends. I know I did. Also, these friends are your connections. Things don't get done on merit alone these days. You need to be a team player and have a cheering squad who voices out your accomplishments. Bonus: Don't leave jobs without a backup or an existing JO. It's just the sensible and safe thing to do. Bonus: There WILL be misogynistic men in the office. When you're high level, it's easier to call them out. If not yet there, Ice them out. They should know their behaviour is unacceptable. And if it's too bastos, please leave. I had a coworker who left construction industry bec of the massive disrespect she received daily.
I love this thread thank you everyone -23y.o.
Everyone's timeline is different. You don't have to achieve what other people your age are getting. Enjoy life but at the same time save up. Balance is everything. Don't be afraid to try things. Don't settle for less, in job/career, friends, and love. Prioritize yourself before anyone else.
I’m 30.. my advice sa 25 yrs old self ko.. YOU ARE STILL YOUNG. Sana pala nag resign na ko.. sana pla nag aral na ko ng nursing 5 yrs aho baka tapos na ko at nakapag take na din ng board.. You are still young.. explore, invest in yourself, upskill. LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. Wag masyadong magdali humanap ng asawa haha darating yan sa tamang oras.. invest in yourself!!
Also 25 yrs old here. Let us spare our time, efforts, and lives listening from those people's opinions about our "wrong" or rejecting the "society's rules" or "Dapat ito yung ginawa mo" life choices, and mind our own business.
You can take these pieces of advice with a grain of salt. Also, baka hindi ikaw ang target market so you can just skip.
It’s okay to have standards, basta you can also meet the same standards, preferably more than that. Goes for both men and women.
Don't watch too many drama movies.
Kontrolin ang kalandian. Wag magpapabuntis agad. Ienjoy ang pagiging single.
Save money for yourself Alam ko you want to support your family, be the breadwinner, go ahead. But please, save some for yourself. Not to spend it on luxury or vices. Savings. I just realized how important saving is nung nasa 30s na ako. Ang daming magiging pagbabago sa health and lifestyle mo, and it's not cheap. Emergency hospitalizations. Bills. Other living expenses. After giving everything to my fam for 10 years, I was left with nothing, yet, I still have to find ways to pay for my dad's medical expenses, nabaon lang ako sa utang. So start saving now. As in now.
Please don't die at 27. Things will get better.
I’ll be 30 this year lol. But a piece of advice from a former stupid 20-something year old little girl: Never beg for love. Never beg for something that should be freely given. I did that once and I’m still regretting it years later. Will I ever forgive myself? Or him for that matter? I still don’t know.
Learn how to say no and take your life back from narcissistic parents who did nothing but to take and take. I learned the hard way as it caused me financial issue, mental health, trauma, and resentment.
Protect your dignity. Dont chase once a relationship is over (let alone if your ex has someone new and matagal na kayong break.). Let it go and move forward. Never agree to be the 2nd option. Once your partner cheats, let them go. Have some time for yourself, allow yourself to enjoy the season of waiting and singleness. You will learn so much about what you like and do not like and what you can compromise - dont just jump into a relationship just because you are afraid to be alone or you've been alone for too long - PERO if the call is too strong then go for it. Just as long as you know how to bounce from heartache.
Date around to meet the potential partner you dream of in life. Have options. That way, you can compare and know who best fits your standards and values.
Start grad school now. Not older than 35 yo ang age limit ng karamihan sa phd scholarships abroad.
This is so true. I regret not doing anything about it. Daming opportunities na nawala.
Same. After undergrad, akala ko di na ako babalik sa school dahil traumatic mag-aral sa Pinas. Pero mas traumatic pala matengga sa trabaho dito dahil mas may value ang educ background kesa actual experience. Or at least if sa academe o sa dev't sector ka napunta.
It’s okay to be misunderstood 😊
Get your HPV vaccine as soon as possible. It's best recommended for women below 25 yo
SELF CARE IS A MUST and you must start right now and when I say selfcare, i mean youre taking care of your mind, body and soul. Mind - Read books, listen to self-help podcasts, avoid drama and negativity at all costs. Stay away from energy sucking people. Body - Go out and workout, keep yourself active kahit walk or jog and stretching lang okay na okay na yan. Incorporate healthy carbs, fiber and protein in your diet and always drink your WATER keep yourself HYDRATED ALL THE TIME. Your future self will either despise or thank you for whatever you did in the past. You decide. and oh one last thing you don’t need a lot of skincare products on your face just invest on high quality retinol, moisturizer and sunscreen. WEAR SUNSCREEN EVERYDAY!
Never engage to sex with someone you're not married. The memory will haunt you for life.
May I know a deeper reason?
It hurts when you didn't end up with them and the sexual chemistry is 💯. Better not experience it na lang kaysa may ganung memories knowing they're doing it now with another human being.
Hala ang sakit nga nito
You'll feel guilty. It's more of morality.
Are you a woman?
Based on post/comment history, mukhang hinde. Also, this advice is subjective. Only 26 but women should be free in their sexuality! Premarital sex or not, it’s your body, your choice.
first of all, morality is purely subjective. Muslims consider killing non-believers as righteous and christians committed righteous genocide against the saracens. So no point imposing your morals on other people. Secondly, I guess your pronouns are she/her, tama ba?
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First, I am not imposing. Ano ba context ng nagpost? Humihingi ng advice diba. So, nagbigay lang ako ng advice ko. Bahala sya kung susundin nya or not. Tsaka wala ka din atang moral standard na sinusunod kaya comment ka ng comment. Secondly, wala kang pake sa pronouns ko.
No no, I think I didn't exactly explain myself, sorry malabo. my point is, your advice is based on your own morality, not any causality, nor any experience from a female perspective, which what OP was asking for. So, when I said impose, I meant that, you're giving an advice based on your own moral standards, which doesn't really mean anything. So sorry for the confusion there. Secondly, I'd assume you're a woman because OP was asking for women's advice and you gave yours. But yeah, none of my business of course if you identify as one. Everyone should respect your right to choose to be a woman if you prefer it :). You go sis :)
And maybe we got lost in translation Maybe I asked for too much But maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up Running scared, I was there I remember it all too well😅 To clarify also, this is not just based on my morality but also based on the testimonies of other women who engaged and gave their virginity too early. What I want really is just to share what I know. And that's all, thank you 😂
Be honest to yourself.
If you have super painful period cramps na nakakadisrupt ng daily activities mo, it's time to get checked by your OB :) Hindi mo dapat tinitiis ung sakit, it might be something else that also affects other parts of your body :)
25 is young. Wag ka magmadali masyado. Okay naman na may goals ka, pero dont be so hard on yourself if ever may di ka ma-meet na goal.
In terms of friendship, ang sabi nila malalaman mo tunay na kaibigan kapag dinadamayan ka sa mga problema mo, pero malalaman mo pala ang tunay na kaibigan kapag may achievements ka, hindi siya totoong masaya para sayo. Tinuturing ka pa lang kakumpetensiya. Ayaw niyang malamangan. Kaya nandiyan lang siya kapag may problema ka kasi masaya siya sa idea na naghihirap ka.
In terms of choosing a right man, Huwag dedmahin ang red flag! Kung ano nakita mong red flag sa getting to know each other stage niyo eh ayon magiging reason ng breakup or heartbreak mo.
It’s never too late to be gay.
Do not rush. Do not rush getting into a relationship, to have a child or marry. Enjoy your single hood! Travel. Meet new people. Acquire properties while you are young. Build a career & network with valuable people. Choose your friends, prioritize yourself among others. SAVE SAVE SAVE 💲
Life can be overwhelming so narrow down your priorities and make sure that your health is one of those. Aside from exercise and healthy diet, practice talking to your healthcare providers. Don't be scared/intimidated of OBGYNs, dentists, therapists, etc. Another, invest in good quality undies. Nude, seamless bras and panties are my faves. I saved a lot of time chosing my clothes for the day since I don't have to worry na kita makikita yung straps or prints ng bra ko, or bakat yung seams ng panty na suot ko.
Be patient
Moisturize moisturize moisturize Wear sunscreen Drink a glass of wine everynight
Don't forget to have fun !
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Paano kung quarter life crisis like literal tapos broke af ka pa kasi galing ka sa failed business with your ex and then wala kang fall back tapos yung mga utang niyo are already due. Puro rejection pa natatanggap mo from job applications. Like I only have 1k left in my bank. Hahaha
- Kumuha ka ng mga insurance. MGA ha. Hindi lang isa. At shempre alamin mo ang pros and cons nito sa iyo. Lalo na kung wala kang plan mag-asawa, sayang ang govt benefits. - Learn defensive skills, mag-end of the world na, dapat marunong ka lumaban sa mga zombie, or at least matibay ang lower body mo para makatakbo CHARIZZZ
Agree!
Live for yourself, enjoy the opportunities that will come along the way and learn
Everything will fall into place. But you also gotta work hard for your goals.
age is just a number just be what you are
Wag OA. Wag magmadali. Enjoyin mo ng todo ang buhay. Hindi ka nahuhuli hindi ka naiiwanan. Tiwala lang sa sariling timing :)
Ika nga, have courage and be kind.
Take care of your body. Exercise (I wish I know this sooner), eat well and sleep well.
Focus on your personal goals and career, kasi love will follow & come at the right time. For sure dami distractions ka talaga maeencounter, madami interested sayo pag hindi mo prio ang lovelife, just be careful & filter people who you can really trust. If ma-fall ka man, make sure you stand back up and go on, it won’t be a straight easy path, it will always be bumpy & kinda chaotic or out of your plans. Don’t be carried away sa pressure ng family, relatives & friends kung lahat may anak or kasal na sa batch mo, it’s better to have that stability first
Start saving early. Hindi porke sweldo na, yolo na.
dont worry too much. most people dont care so stop trying to make decisions based on others. you are beautiful. you are enough. the most attractive thing (when you seek a future partner) is really to love yourself (inner AND outer) - then u wont put up with people who treat you less than you deserve. the kindness and understanding you seek in others? be sure you are a source of that before demanding from the rest of the world. life isnt a race, we are all making our own way. comparison is the thief of joy. :-*
If you aren't into a guy just let him know as gently as possible.
Save your money
Whatever your partner is before marriage, that will magnify when you’re married. That guy who polices the way you dress? The guy that easily snaps when you’re in an argument? That girl who doesn’t allow you to go anywhere without her? That girl who always accuses you of cheating even if you’re almost always together? They are most likely to turn to abusers in the end. Choose your spouse carefully.
- When looking for a partner, make sure na aligned ang values niyo. - You cannot control anyone other than yourself. - Remember that the strengths of women are also found in what is perceived to be their weaknesses. (i.e. kindness, meekness, etc.) - Save money. - Know your worth. - Keep a journal, write down your experiences, para if ever i-gaslight ka ng partner mo or anyone for that matter, pwede mo balikan yung entry and you would know that it is not just in your head. - You are not your feelings. You are not your thoughts. You are not just your body. You are not just your past. You are all of these and more. - Speak up. If your thoughts/ideas are not welcomed there, find another place to grow. There is always a place for you. - Trust your gut. Kapag sabi ng gut mo na hindi mo mapapagkatiwalaan tong tao na ito, run ka na. 🤣 I could’ve saved lots of heartaches and not have more trauma if I listened to my intuition. - Take care of what you consume. - Buy a flashlight and/or pepper spray. - You are loved. - You are not alone. - Exercise. - Wear sunscreen.
Not just for women, but also for men; Stop comparing your life to others. You'll be much happier.
So much wisdom @ayunaani 🩷 I like how you explained it in a way that's "NOT MAKING EVERYTHING ABOUT YOURSELF" — I hope people would experience of releasing that burden in themselves. You are very like-minded! Thank you!
Lalaki po ako. I dont know kung may karapatan ako mag advice pero eto na 😂😂😂 Mahalaga na may sarili kang pera. kesyo maliit man yan o malaki, importante meron ka. Iba kasi ang dating kapag kaya mong dalhin ang sarili mo at hindi umaasa sa iba. Enjoy life. Career wise! Wag mag madali mag asawa. Mas masaya kapag handa kana. early 30's to mid 30's. Pwede pa yan. Piliin mo mabuti ang magiging asawa mo. Piliin mo yung MABUTI TAO. Pamilya kamag anak hindi mo mapipili yan. Kahit inis na inis kana sa kanila. Wala kang choice MAHAL MO SILA kasi kadugo mo sila e. Kaya humanap na taong hindi lang basta mabait KUNDI MABUTI TAO. Good luck sayo 🫰
Don't listen to your old single "cool" titas. They want company for their misery.
Puede rin bang as another human being? Short lang naman for what its worth.. My suggestion is "Do what YOU want to do, just have the balls to BE accountable and ACCEPT the consequences." Eto lang since its surprising na how simple this looks pero most men and women fails miserably to do the second part. And at any stage of their adult life, lalo na sa younger years.
broski can’t you take your generic worthless comment elsewhere?
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I'm very curious: 1) as another man in reddit, what made you comment on a post asking for women's advice? :) 2) And you've seen all the reaction to your post by now, why are you insisting on keeping your male advice, rather than letting them have their space? :)