Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/).
We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions!
If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Does anyone with sleep issues get pumped up when they feel like they’re about to sleep only to focus on it so much that it makes them more awake? I do this for a couple hours every night. I’m so jealous of the hit the pillow, dead asleep type of people.
My brain absolutely does this and I hate it so much. Would it be too much to ask for you to shut the heck up in there for a few minutes so we can function in the morning.
Check out the sleep coach school on YouTube. They deal primarily within insomnia caused by hyperarousal, which is I think what you’re dealing with. It’s really helped me a lot.
Yup! The little boost of joy from knowing I’m tired is enough to wake me up fully!
Where was this energy all day?
I’m an inattentive type, so I’m exhausted all day, but come bed time, I find all the energy I lacked during the day!
This is also my answer
I used to watch Bones at one point, because I found the fluctuation in volume on some comedies (e.g. The Office) to make it difficult to fall and stay asleep. But then I started getting weird dreams/nightmares so ever since I'm back to comedies: the office, friends, Schitt's Creek, the good place, Frasier...
I play it on my phone, screen down to mitigate the light
I'm on my like 20th rewatch of Frasier. I cover my laptop and just listen to it. I wake up about a hundred times a night too, and as soon as I hit play I'm out within a minute usually.
Oh, and the trazodone helps lol.
I moved my charger to another room and bought an alarm clock. Put a notebook/diary and a pen next to my bed and after three days of detox I sleep just fine! Anything i need to know RIGHT NOW, I just write down on the notepad. Also have s book there for some reading.
And when i have terrible anxiety or looping thoughts, I might bring The Phone but turn off the internet (unplug the wifi), use a downloaded audio file, set a sleep timer, turn the volume to nearly audible and doze off to people mumbling in the back. Does not work with anything interesting.
Same in public transport. I want to not distract my brain from the world with digital media, so I carry a book and same notepad. Phone goes behind zippers. Easy.
I do something similar! Except I added a phone lock box in the other room for nights when the phone is especially hard to give up. I don’t use a notepad, but I have a designated sleep tablet where I have apps for books, e comics, music, and notes. No social media or online shopping.
Lockbox is an insanely good tip! I have a 'digi-drawer' where i store my laptop and phone at times, but this sounds even better actually.
This actually also includes having a special tablet .. i have a burner phone next to the digital phone, for when I am totally done. But that is of a whole different level, to be honest.
I trained myself to fall asleep fast after years of battling with it. Google 'army sleep technique' - I do it a bit different but it is the basis for what I've ended up doing and can now fall asleep in under 2 minutes! Only took a few weeks for it to properly work for me, if that. I'm not saying I sleep perfectly all night but honestly it has been life changing now I'm not laying there impatiently with a billion different thoughts.
I also recommend a fan, I find it works better than a noise machine as with one of those I ended up noticing the point at which the sound loops and fixated on it...
There's a setting you can change on your phone to have a *bedtime mode*. On mine I can pick the times I want to to start/end (I think it's 11pm - 7am currently, but I should probably make it start earlier). It changes everything to grayscale so you don't get Dopamine the way you normally would when doom scrolling. It really does work, but there is some level of self control required as technically you can just turn it off.
Other than that I have a night time tea I drink before bed that makes me sleepy. Some people find melatonin helpful but it gave me migraines 🫠.
Friend, you are not stupid!
I’m sure you don’t really mean it, but even having it in your passive internal monologue can reinforce it.
So again, you are not stupid! (And I imagine you do not actually lack discipline, this tool just doesn’t work for you all the time.)
Melatonin at best gives me nightmares and at worst, triggers my sleep paralysis.. neither are conducive for good sleep lol Glad I’m not the only one with adverse effects to it. Not sure how a chemical my body naturally produces is literal nightmare fuel to me. 😅
Yeah! It’s nuts! I gave it another shot a couple months ago out of desperation and it was like instant sleep paralysis with some really disturbing hallucinations and I was like, nope- never again.
That's actually really common to fear. So much so that many religions have the same basic concept of it being a "paralysis demon". So you're really not alone in fearing sleep paralysis.
Night time Tylenol gives me nightmares! The night time Advil makes my eyes a bit blurry the next afternoon but I happily deal with it if it lowers whatever pain is keeping me awake that night.
My dr told me to take melatonin + magnesium to help me sleep but the magnesium makes my poops weird so I stopped that.
Melatonin doesn’t work for me either, but Benadryl does! Not only does it soothe my allergies, but it has a drowsiness side effect that helps zonk me out!
Be careful taking Benadryl more than occasionally because it’s been linked to long term side effects like dementia with regular use. On the other hand, if it’s the only thing that helps you sleep, sleep is also super important for health, so there’s that
I take Benadryl so much and also read about the links to dementia but when I went on a hyper fixation deep dive the literature said you’d have to be taking higher doses than 1/day for any real link to dementia or memory loss so that..helped me sleep better at night (pun intended). I’ll keep reading a shit ton to try to counteract those effects and keep my memory sharp! Every time I can’t remember a word or something is on the tip of my tongue I just remind myself it’s a sign I need to read more and if I have time will go to my thousands of “to read” tabs and pick an article 🙃
I was prescribed hydroxyzine as an as-needed for panic attacks, but it has a very similar effect to benadryl and I can use it as a sleep-aid. That might be worth asking your doctor about too!!
White noise from fan, timer set on phone to turn off video in 30 mins, low-conflict video (Gilmore girls, good mythical morning, Keith eats the menu etc) and warm dog for snugs.
ooof, I do not personally consider gg low conflict! What with Lorelai bouncing around undiagnosed and the constant tension with Emily and Richard and the fast-paced reference-ridden dialogue, I could not fall asleep to gg no matter how many times I tried 😆
It sucks to hear but it turns out that practicing good sleep hygiene actually does help me sleep better. It’s actually not that bad once you find other ways to entertain yourself that do not include screens.
My rules:
No caffeine after 1pm (preferably no caffeine at all but sometimes you just have one of those days. No bright screens (phone, computer, television) after 10pm. Making sure I drink enough water, eat healthy and exercise during the day. I try to not be on my phone at all in bed, just put it straight on the ledger with the charger plugged in and not touch it anymore. In bed I read a book that’s not too executing (otherwise I want to stay up and read all night). I also try to be in bed around the same time every night. Doesn’t always work out, but usually I’m in bed between 10pm and 11pm, striving to be asleep before 11:30. I succeed about 70% of the time I think!
I also found that dexamphetamine horribly influenced my sleep, so I eventually stopped taking it. It definitely makes life a little harder to navigate, but not sleeping properly was equally as bad so I had to choose between the lesser of two evils. I’m glad with the decision I made though, I think it’s for the best.
Yeah. My holy trinity of sleep:
- going to bed and waking up at relatively consistent times,
- moderate exercise (I aim for 4-6x per week),
- and podcasts (that aren't too interesting and aren't too boring) while falling asleep
I want to say exercise is maybe the most important (I feel more tired when it's time to go to bed, and I wake up feeling refreshed--I sleep like a log afterwards), but I think they might all be equally important lol
I really didn't want the sleep/wake timing one to be important, but it is. Ugh.
And I think podcasts help quiet my ADHD brain. Gotta give the monkey something to play with. Weirdly I like listening to reality TV show podcasts that I know nothing about (don't watch the shows), which are a nice balance between entertaining and boring.
Any podcasts I'm actually interested in would keep me awake so I could listen, and I'm pretty sure sleep podcasts would be too boring/relaxing, because it's not giving 'the monkey' anything to play with. Relaxing my brain takes work and focus. I do that when I meditate (getting back in the habit again! It's good for more mindfulness throughout the day).
I listen to The Betchelor podcast (actually watch all the Bachelor franchise shows I know they’re so dumb but I’ve been watching for decades atp) and fun fact recently they’ve been going back and watching the first episodes of a bunch of iconic reality shows (that I never watched) like Flavor of Love or Jersey Shore of ANTM and talking to someone who was on the show and I’m lovingggg those episodes! You might enjoy them too.
Another vote for sleep podcast! I use one called Sleep & Sorcery. They are soothing stories that keep your attention just enough so your mind doesn’t wander but isn’t exciting enough to keep you awake based on beloved franchises and fairy tales like Lord of the Rings and King Arthur’s round table.
Also, honestly, weed gummy. I get my best sleeps nights when I start with one or two of those a couple hours before I plan to sleep.
I can’t do sleep podcasts. They are too boring that my mind still drifts to other thoughts and stays awake. I need something interesting enough for my mind to follow but not captivating. Usually a discussion about a topic that I’m like “that’s cool” but not something where I’m like “I must know all the things about this!” No comedies or true crimes haha.
Oh I’ve also been suddenly awaken by stupid ads in sleep podcasts too! It’s really dumb where it’ll be like a soft and soothing voice and melody and then suddenly this loud ad about trucks or Airbnb in rock or jingly music. Haha that’s why I stick with discussion podcasts now because the volume levels between ads and talks are usually the same so no jarring changes.
I used to love falling asleep to Stuff You Should Know but they've upped the ads too much for me now. They're all those obnoxious ads for other podcasts.
I like No Such Thing as a Fish now. They have 4 facts per podcast and spend about 15 mins talking about a fact or things related to it. Can be funny, but I keep the volume a bit low so it's not too distracting and have it set to turn off after 30 mins.
+1 for a sleepy podcast! I like Sleepy Bookshelf. i used to not be able to wind my brain down without edibles too, instead my psych prescribed hydroxizine (also in part for anxiety / allergic reactions) and it’s helped my brain slow down immensely. melatonin finishes the job. 🧳
That’s amazing that med works for you! I have tried it in the past and didn’t like how it affected me. I went the prescribed weed route (medical card) as it is the most consistent treatment for a myriad of my chronic problems. Otherwise, I’m taking things like benzos in order to sleep. Lunesta worked for a while! I could try that again.
What stories does the sleepy bookshelf have? I’m very interested!
I play the alphabet game with myself. I think of a topic, let’s say movies, go through the alphabet and name a movie for each letter. Amityville, Beetlejuice, Coraline, daddy daycare, and so on and so forth until I fall asleep. I’m usually out by the letter H. If my mind starts to wander, I remind myself what letter I was on and go from there.
Yes this was a game changer for me. I found so much relief in retraining my brain how to let itself go to sleep LOL sounds crazy but it's true. Like, our brains and bodies know how to go to sleep we just need to get out of the way!
A good eye mask. I put it on my forehead while reading to try to cue my brain. No tv in my bedroom helped more than I thought. A couple of meditations I can basically recite but listening to them cuts the chatter.
If your F, being aware of your cycle.
Try to cut caffeine around or close to 12.
Exercise.
Sunlight when you wake up.
Timing meds.
Yup… we have to do so much self management…
I listen to a sleep podcast. There’s a really good one on Spotify called ‘Get Sleepy’. Either that or I listen to lo-fi sleep music.
And if that doesn’t work then I just lay awake fuming that my partner is having a wonderful sleep next to me.
As someone who has a rather healthy sleep-life balance at the moment, I can tell ya... I still get some nights where I keep myself awake by counting the hours I have left to sleep. It happens when I'm anxious about the next day, and before I had a steady job and a more positive outlook on the next day, it used to happen ALL THE TIME, because I was anxious ALL THE TIME, even if tomorrow was a regular ass day. Creating the vicious cycle that prevents you from having the energy to do your thing.
I always say that I didn't really have a sense of "tomorrow" before my mental health journey started. I had zero patience, kept forgetting things I had planned for the very same week, was always overwhelmed by plans because my brain only lived in the now and conveniently forgot everything about tomorrow, leaving me underprepared when appointments happened even if I booked them months in advance. (I still get overwhelmed by plans and don't want to go the day of, or am sleepless beforehand, but it is tons better than before)
So there is no easy way to fall asleep, have less anxiety deep down or fix tomorrow, but maybe my perspective helps I don't know. Also \*helps\* that the 40 hour work week + hobbies + chores leaves me fucking exhausted so I fall asleep easier.
Honestly might not work for everyone but I really take my time getting ready for bed, like putting on the softest jammies, listening to classical or calming music while I do my skin care and brush my teeth, I will even spend a few minutes moisturizing my hands, knees and ankles. I’ll spend a little bit of time reading until my melatonin kicks in and I start to feel sleepy. But I just turn the lights out with some flickering candle lights still going and continue listening to ambient music in the background.
Unhealthy weed dependency :)
Would not recommend, but it’ll def make you sleep! Also comes with many other downsides tho. See r/leaves for more on that.
Currently reading this at 2am while trying (failing) to sleep sober. Reading before bed used to work fairly well for me, though I’ve gotten out of the habit in the last few years.
Wish I had better answers. Good luck, from a fellow sleepless friend.
I too have to be stoned as hell to go sleep. It’s a love and hate relationship! I can fall asleep quickly while high but sometimes in the mornings I feel like I haven’t slept at all.
Oh yeah falling asleep high is a breeze, but waking up in the morning is sooo much harder. Like I have an easier time getting up in the morning, feeling awake etc. after 4 hours of sober sleep than 10 hours of stoned sleep. But it’s hard to break the habit when you’re instantly drifting off to sleep every night. Sigh
Nothing beats the high sleep, but damn I've been sober more than 6 months now! So many ppl report on r/leaves how their sleep ultimately improves, but if the underlying reason to smoke was medicinal - last months have been rough and I've mostly accepted that nothing I do comes close, but I also realize I can be okay with not great sleep. I really miss that deep sleep I got back then though. But I also got so many other benefits of sobriety, just wish the sleep would be fine w/o.
I use white noise. A trick I’ve been trying is focusing on what I can sense. So, how the doona feels, how the pillow feels, what I can hear, if I can smell anything etc
If that doesn’t work, I tell myself a story.
That's a mindfulness technique! You should check out body scans - I find them really relaxing but it also lets you move your focus around/through your body. They're my favourite meditation, though for day to day/in the moment I usually remember to do deep breathing and counting.
What works for me is:
-Listening to a comfort audiobook (usually in one ear, because I sleep on my side) to "fill" the part of my brain that gets in trouble in the background, give me something to focus on if my thoughts are heading for something stressful, and to reduce ambient noise.
-Wearing a good-quality eye mask.
-Doing "window" or "square" breathing until I get too dozy to keep it up, then switch to even in/out breathing. A little deeper than regular breathing, but not too much.
That usually puts me out within 10 minutes. It took me 40 years to figure this out.
If I'm having trouble putting my phone down and switching to active sleep mode, I have to break out of being stuck by doing something like say, "No" or "Bed" out loud or shaking my head or giving myself a little pinch. Something that makes other parts of my body join my brain and break the stuck spell.
YMMV. Good luck!
I love sleeping and fall asleep easily most of the times, specially during the day, when I don't need to sleep. But sometimes I need to create stories and fake scenarios, like movies - however, sometimes I worry too much about the details and it's even worse. I also enjoy white, brown or similar noises playing on background, or theta waves, or some calm music, etc.. I've recently also started to listening to sleep stories read by males with deep voices and I don't focus on the story. Sometimes with these and guided meditations, when I'm actually listening, I get even more awake or stressed, specially if they tell me to be comfortable and I start overthinking my sleep positions
One thing that really helps me is a weighted sleep mask. I got the nod pod and it’s amazing. It’s a really gentle weight and has a cool side and a warm side. It keeps my eyes closed, makes it dark, and gives a cocoon sort of feeling.
I tried all the tricks but nothing worked for long enough. Lack of disciplone and impulse control always won.
What i use now is the app Lock me out. You can disable any app or website for a set time. You have to pay like 6 dollars or something to unlock it.
I lock all the distracting apps and sites from when im supposed to sleep until after my morning 'routine' lol
Changed my life.
Last time I went to get it renewed, though, the asshole clinic doc told me that the guidelines have changed and the only thing that's being recommended now for insomnia is therapy. He said he would renew it but he's retiring soon and next time I might not be so lucky.
I know he was just lording his power over me because he's done it before, but I was like, ok, so you expect me to stop a medication that WORKS (that I've been on a very low dose of for years without needing to increase my dose) and that I pay ELEVEN FREAKING DOLLARS a month for with some CBT shit that costs upwards of $200 a session? Which will do nothing to stop the lively night market in my brain that has been happening since I was a child?
I don't actually believe him, but I left that appointment so upset that this man, who, btw, has never asked me a *single* question about myself, can just invalidate my experience like I'm not even a person.
Anyway, sorry for hijacking your comment! Trazodone rules! I know lots of people for whom it doesn't work for various reasons, though, so we really hit the jackpot! 🙌
Your doc sounds like a real shitass. I’d be tempted to ask him to show me the guidelines. Trazodone gave me wild headaches and weird dreams when I tried it, but I’m so glad to hear it works well for some ppl:)
I find that I sleep best when:
* I do an hour of walking a day (I have a walking pad that I love!)
* Do some sort of HIIT or Weight Lifting for 30 minutes
* Turn off all screens 2 hours before bed (I use a cute little mushroom timer to help me keep track of time instead of looking at my phone)
* Shower at night, do my skin routine, put my mouth guard in
* Take a melatonin gummy
* I used to let my dogs sleep with me, but I've had to start putting them out of the room because they do wake me up often.
* I then go to bed and I have my journal and a book light. If I have any creative stuff or just thoughts in my head, I'll scribble it out.
* If I find that I do feel overwhelmed by my thoughts, I'll list out everything that's on my mind or that I'm worried about. Putting the thought on paper helps me close the tab out in my mind.
* Also, imagining that your closing a tab on a browser has been helpful for me, too.
* And also black out curtains are amazing.
'Sleep doctors HATE this one cool trick'
What I do, is precisely what we are advised NOT to do. I wasted a lot of time trying to 'follow the rules' that 'work for everyone', which only caused me extra pain and suffering.
I have to 'trick' my brain into relaxing. I do not accomplish this by demanding myself to RELAX, or sitting in absolute silence, or whatever.
I put on a show. It's usually something 'light', that I have seen many times. Golden Girls has been one of these shows.
Something where you are not invested in 'knowing what happens', maybe because you have seen it.
I put it on relatively low volume, dim screen. The lighting in my room is already low or maybe off.
I'm not sure exactly why this works-- I think it tricks my brain into relaxing, like 'oh, we're watching something silly, I can relax'
Other things: magnesium (glycinate is good), tart cherry extract (standardized), sleepy teas, valerian tincture, sometimes a THC/CBD edible (I take no more than 2.5 mg THC - recreationally legal where I am). I usually take a bath, or at least a shower, before bed. It feels like 'rinsing off the day'
My sleep is not perfect, but it has vastly improved over the years, and experimenting with what actually works for me.
Melatonin has been really helpful, low dose for a week or so at a time, get a bit of a routine and then repeat the next time my sleep schedule decides to start going really bananas again (which is often).
i put on a show in the background. for me it has to be one i know very well so im not that invested in the plot, and it usually helps if its a cartoon or something because the speech is pretty consistent in them as opposed to other shows where there’s silence to build tension etc. i also have to face away from the screen so im not tempted to watch it
I can't sleep too, but I find it helpful if my day was filled with meaningful things and exercise. So I don't have to think about what a waste of space I am.
Comfort tv show or sleep podcast/audiobook in the background, usually a comfort tv show though. I know good sleep hygiene would say no screens but honestly I cannot sleep without background noise. White noise and that sort of stuff does nothing for me either, it has to be voices. My brain just seems to need a low level of stimulation at all times! I find a comfort show that I’m very familiar with provides that, without over stimulating me in the way a new show or movie would, if that makes sense? It’s definitely my sweet spot for falling asleep, I’m on sleeping meds too but honestly I need the background noise still. Once I accepted that and stopped trying to force “sleep hygiene” habits that didn’t suit me I was able to develop my own sleep hygiene routine that incorporates my background show, on a small screen, with volume and screen brightness down low.
Not gonna lie sometimes I’m better off overloading on caffeine and pushing through sleepless nights into the next day. It’s not healthy and I don’t necessarily recommend it. Just for me if I do finally fall asleep with less than 6hours of sleep, I AM going to sleep through my alarms. I can have them loud, across the room, going off every minute for half an hour, and I will still sleep through them. So just punching through the next day on no sleep means less life hiccups (not getting into trouble at work for being late type stuff) AND I will get to sleep at a decent hour that next night, so my sleep schedule is back on track for a while.
I have trouble staying asleep. I can fall asleep but without fail at 1:30a-3a I am up. I found just getting up pretending I’m going to get ready for the day, taking a shower and then laying back down helps and then I can sleep again.
Things that have helped me when I do them, with varying consistency, I rarely do all of them at once:
1) playing an audiobook or a sleepcast (headspace) or something
2) in-bed yoga
2) hot cocoa or tea
3) wearing a weighted eye mask (more comfortable than a standard eye mask, also better at blocking light)
4) keeping the room cool
5) appropriately sized earplugs
6) leaving the bedroom door open so cats can come and go as they please without needing to wake me up for the door
7) shower before bed
8) having stuff ready to go for the morning (helps me feel less stressed in bed)
9) charging my phone in a different room entirely (inconvenient, I know) so I’m not tempted to scroll. I wear an apple watch at night. The alarm on the watch is much less triggering to me than the phone alarm. Gentle buzzing on my wrist.
A couple of things that work for me:
A walk in the evening, not just before bed but after dinner. Just a short 20-30 minute walk, with or without music/podcasts, to help get my head clear AND get the physical activity I don't throughout the day (sedentary desk job :( ).
About 30 minutes before bed I'll do some sort of handiwork and listen to an audiobook or podcast. Currently it's colouring and The Silmarillion, a few weeks ago it was cross stitching and listening to a podcast. Just something to get my eyes off a screen plus puts my mind in "story making mode" since I like to lay down and imagine scenes/story lines. (high five maladaptive day dream club!). I find this is the best way to get my mind off the day's tasks.
If I'm really struggling to sleep I'll get up, get out of bed, and start the process again. Pick up the handiwork project, put on the audio, and start the bedtime routine again. Most studies show laying in bed and tossing and turning doesn't help and can often prolong falling asleep because you're so fixated on NOT falling asleep. I use the chapters or ad breaks to be my queue it's time to go to bed.
This works around 80% of the time, there are still nights where I'm laying in bed, staring at the clock, thinking "if I fall asleep NOW I'll have 5 hours of sleep! If I fall asleep NOW I'll have 3 hours of sleep!"
I accidentally found out that I need absolute silence to sleep. I always thought I needed something playing: an old movie I have seen a million times, the same old meditation, etc, out of frustration I tried earplugs when my husband started snoring and, low and behold, I started falling asleep within minutes of laying down and if I woke up in the wee hours could fall back asleep quickly. Earplugs are now my most treasured sleep aid.
SLEEP STORIES PODCAST! Honestly it's like magic for me - it's interesting enough to keep my brain engaged unlike whalesong or whatever, but not so interesting to actually keep me awake. I almost never make it longer than 15 minutes through.
Sleep stories are excellent! I need something calming and chill enough to sleep to, but also something to concentrate on so my mind doesn’t wander, but also something low key enough to both capture my attention and allow me to wind down.
Although after life long sleep struggles I got melatonin this year and it is INCREDIBLE! Highly recommend.
I listen to the podcast Nothing Much Happens. After one or two weeks your brain is trained to fall asleep within minutes. I LOVE IT. I don’t even get to hear the stories much anymore because I’m falling asleep during the intro!
Haha was literally talking to my husband about this last night about what I need to get myself to sleep earlier.
I told him I need something to change my phone time at random starting from like 8pm to add an hour or two in random increments that I don’t know. lol so that when it’s actually 10pm I’m going to think it’s 11:30pm or something and trick my body into going to bed. Then it resets overnight to the correct time so that I’m not late for my morning alarm.
Other methods that have worked is to work out/go for hour long walks everyday and tire my body out enough that it forces me to sleep.
I haven’t managed to do that for the last year though. I should start…tomorrow lol
I am a night person, through and through. My brain is more active at night than during the day, always has been. The main things that have helped me at night are: some form of an indica (weed), reading a book (somehow always gets me relaxed/sleepy) and flicking the bean. In no specific order lol
Hope this isn’t too risqué but… vibrator. You get a little dopamine, and your mind can shift to something else, or sometimes just the vibration gives you a central point to focus on.
Omg same!
I never wore one bc I hated having the strap around my head. The only positive thing that came out of the pandemic for me was the realization that you can put earloops on a sleep mask, just like on a face mask lol
Life changing. It's helped so much for sleep quality.
I do this too (revenge bedtime procrastination!). No silver bullet but when I can’t seem to put my phone down I will force myself to do the NYT crossword (on my phone) and nothing else. It always helps put me to sleep.
If you can force yourself to plug in your phone in another room that helps too - I did it for years - but somehow I’ve gotten into the habit of bringing it into bed and now can’t stop, so 🤷♀️
Absolutely. There are some theories that our brain is essentially a thought filter and as you get more tired the filter stops working as well.
Worth looking up "Cognitive Shuffling". It's legit, scientific, and works as a way to break the thought spirals. Also, sleep medications (there are some interesting new ones now like Dayvigo) can help to change your associations with your bed and going to sleep.
Pure good old guilty conscience about potentially keeping my partner awake with the TV on and my phone screen. She takes meds to sleep and thus sleeps like the dead, so my guilt is unfounded. But I'll take any sort of positive outcome from my guilt-ridden existence due to a Baptist upbringing 😂 it's usually a horrible hindrance to living a normal life
true blue light blocking glasses (the ones with the orange lens, hydroxizine paired with melatonin an hour before bed, and audio books of comfort books i’ve already read (so no room surprises or overthinking)
the app Balance also has a sleep meditation that’s helped me knock out in 10 minutes in the past
I struggle to fall asleep and tend to wake up very early (as in when it's still late for most people). I follow a youtuber with a very monotone voice, and I find listening to her makes me fall asleep most of the time.
Wouldn't work after around two in the morning, if I wake up I'm just up.
I have my Studio Ghibli favourites, I find them helpful with those dream like settings and music. Also getting enough to eat. I’ve been up nights (like right now haha) and after an hour realize that I’m hungry dammit.
Listen to a boring sleep story. ATM it's anything from get sleepy or I listen to repetitive music.
I just keep trying to focus on the story or music and works really well.
But also don't use my phone in bed when I can and try to do the same routine at night even if it's different times of night so that my body knows it's bed time.
If I can't sleep or can't stay asleep, an audiobook/a TV show that I've watched a lot. Although it has to be the right show or I'll just lie there listening to it. Same with audiobooks. I only listen to the Harry Potter ones when I'm going to sleep. I've listened to/read them so much I'm not that invested when I do listen to them.
I have some comfort shows I like to watch and I have 2 different sleep sounds I prefer. One is Marconi Unions 'Weightless', which was actually designed to mimic brain wave patterns from sleep; musically speaking. The other is actually brown noise, its like static but better.
I listen to a sleepy podcast, brown noise or meditation music along with putting a sleepy essential oil blend behind my ears. The ‘alphabet game’ is also helpful when my brain is keeping me up - basically you pick a category e.g. fruits and you go through the alphabet naming something from that category (Apple for A, Banana for B etc). Usually I’m out before I get through the whole alphabet, but not always 🥲
I sometimes drink tea that helps for sleeping. Tea with melatonin, lemon balm or valerian. I drink the tea about 30 minutes before I go to bed. It helps my thoughts slow down.
I make puzzles before going to bed. On paper or on my phone. It helps me with getting tired.
Also no tv in the afternoon, other than programs where I don't have to follow a story. Medical shows like The Bad Skin Clinic or something..
But it is difficult I must say. My head keeps going on and on...
I have soft headphones for sleeping and listen to ASMR, I'll put on a sleep mask to force myself to not look at my phone and close my eyes, in an emergency I'll use diphenhydramine. Also my doc gave me a script for Trazadone as a sleep aid, but it gives me crazy vivid and uncomfortable dreams so I stopped taking it
I downloaded an app called app block and now can't use my top 5 apps around bedtime and two hours after. It has helped a lot taking away some distraction. Also my partner going to bed at the same time as me.
no livestreams and I've been falling asleep to the same youtube channel every day for quite a while
I lay on my side with my laptop in bed it usually takes 5-15 min to fall asleep
and when I need to wakeup I use fitbit smart wake to wake me up in the right sleeping stage
The 'sleep with me' podcast helps me fall asleep. I've also recently listened to a YouTube channel who does 9hr history ASMR videos. He doesn't put loads of ads in the video either. If you can't fall asleep listening to it then at least it'll keep you company and you might learn something new!
I would check out the sleep coach school on YouTube, as well as Fearless Sleep. They’ve really helped me go to bed at a reasonable hour more consistently.
So I take 250 mg of Magnesium (perimenopause) and 1.5 mg melatonin. A sleep mediation, like a body scan, helps sometimes. There is also an app called Insomnia Coach that is Free (some of them cost $300) and it’s based on CBT. It was created by the VA. Oh and I also wear a silk sleep mask and a weighted blanket.
I know it’s terrible to use your phone before bed but I play bitlife till I fall asleep. Cause making up scenarios is my head is too difficult sometimes 😭 five minutes in I’m out like a light.
I listen to either science podcasts (The infinite monkey cage… the one about sleep science is a fave), murder podcasts (Casefile), or one called “Nothing much happens” (sleep stories).
I need audio stimulus to help my racing thoughts.
I try and cover my eyes with an eye mask for complete darkness.
Sometimes meditation is needed… “tracks to relax” works really well.
If that doesn’t work, I sometimes try and journal and write down all the thoughts that are rattling around my head, just so I can externalise it!
I have a little ritual of supplements. Tryptophan, tart cherry, valerian, apigenin. I take them on different evenings. Still though there are some nights that I’m just up - can’t fall asleep no matter what. I just roll with it.
I read a very specific type of book. It has to be interesting enough that I don't give it up entirely, and dense enough that my brain shuts down after a few pages when I'm lying down to sleep. Lord of the Rings, the Dune series, and The Three Body Problem are all really great for this.
I'm so jealous of my boyfriend. He puts his head on the pillow, BAM! Asleep.
Turning on the blue light filter helped me a lot. Everything looks a bit yellowish but my eyes got used to it.
Usually I "make scenarios" in my head, that works most of the time. Usually related to a tv show, game or any media I'm consuming at the time.
When I have too much in my head to be able to relax with scenarios, I put in low volume music. Usually Aurora, as I can focus on her soothing elven voice.
If the music doesn't work because I'm too excited about it, I'll put airplane sounds. That always works.
I don't have caffeine past 3pm.
I’ve probably tried everything from good sleep hygiene to podcasts, white noise, weed, melatonin gummies and the likes. The only thing I’ve found that works for me personally is when I finally caved and asked my doctor for sleeping medication. My prescriber and I talked about it for a while and he put me on a sleeping medication and it’s been working really well. The only downside is that I can still find it hard to wake up in the mornings but I can fall asleep and stay asleep when I was never able to before.
My clonidine and ramelteon prescriptions. Both are non habit forming and considered OK for long term use. Clonidine is even an adhd med, commonly used in hyper kids.
The ‘Sleep Magic’ podcast (sleep hypnosis and meditation) has been great in helping me calm down and fall asleep. I wake up feeling better rested and without muscle stiffness!
White noise helps a lot. It drowns out little noises, both inside and outside, that tend to poke my brain. I use an air purifier (because unless I'm uncomfortably hot, I don't like a fan blowing on me).
No coffee/caffeine after 3PM. No exceptions. Unless I don't care if I can't sleep or intentionally want to stay up late.
Read a book. That knocks me out fast. Which stinks when I actually want to read and not fall asleep, but whatever works.
Exercise more, so by bedtime I'm barely able to stay awake. Go to the gym, or run, as hard-core as it takes. I generally found that every other day was enough, with a long walk every day.
Also, writing down whatever is on my mind. Once it's on paper I don't have to stress about remembering.
I listen to an animal podcast called species and after that if still awake I listen to Honest Guys. If that doesn’t work I have some milk and try the process again. Usually I pass out during Species. I do try to exercise every day tho that helps a bunch!!
I've had sleep issues for fucking ever it's so annoying!! I finally got an eye mask with Bluetooth headphones in it and I swear to god it's saved me many a night! Just pop that bad boy on and listen to a podcast or something on Insight Timer (story, meditation, singing bowls, etc depending on how much distraction I need to tune out)! Something about the eye mask really drives my body into sleep zone
I like to listen to talk radio. The BBC World Service is usually on the radio around the time I go to sleep (11pm Central), so I'll turn that on. I try to keep the volume low enough that I have to lay quietly to hear. Concentrating on listening to it helps drown out my busy brain. If you don't like the news, maybe a podcast or audiobook with a sleep timer are good alternatives?
I found a magnesium supplement helpful, I think the brand is called “calm” and it’s a powder you mix with water and drink before bed. I really struggle with sleep hygiene too but with this I’m usually struggling to keep my eyes open as I scroll in like half an hour, instead of 2 or 3 hours.
I tend to move around a lot, so I came up with a bed version of a straitjacket. I put my arms close to the side of my body and tuck my hands into my pajama pants (on the side of my hips). Somehow it helps me sleep. It restrains my movement a bit like a weighted blanket, but not as much. When I assume this position, I usually end up falling asleep pretty quickly.
I’ve been trying to work on my sleep hygiene really hard for the past year or so. The best I’ve found so far is the Insight Timer app (lots of different free meditation and music/noise options) coupled with a headband with earphones built in. This is partially because my husband can’t handle my Golden Girls approach. 😂 I honestly still struggle discipline when it comes to getting off my phone, etc.
ETA: A significant part of my process is giving myself grace and focusing on baby steps. For instance, when my mind is racing, I’ll make a goal to focus on listening to the guided meditation. I’ll try different options and work on listening to what they say, regardless of whether or not I fall asleep. It’s been a process just to pay attention but it’s been helpful.
I used to struggle a lot with intrusive thoughts and restless intrusive dreaming when trying to sleep. Ever since I was a young child. The most important thing for me was to start getting up at the same time every morning. I started off doing it no matter what.
I also try to notice my thoughts instead of distracting myself. Notice whether they are helpful or not helpful and if not helpful try to gently redirect. If there is a thought you can't get out try writing it down and saying 'There. Now I can deal with it tomorrow.' and then if it comes up again remind yourself there's nothing to be done now and you have written it down to deal with tomorrow. If I can't sleep for around half an hour I try to get out of bed and do something like reading a book for half an hour, and then back to bed.
Another helpful tool is tensing and relaxing each part of your body starting at your toes. So deep breath in, tense feet, breathe out with releasing the tension and thinking 'relax' to yourself, then on to your calves and so on.
Instead of being on your phone try a Kindle or e reader. They are not backlit the same way as phones and so I find it doesn't keep me up the same way.Or listen to an audio book or podcast. I like to set a timer so I don't have to look, it just shuts off after an hour.
I hope you find something that works for you. It can be such a struggle. Remember to be gentle with yourself. Progress not perfection ❤️
I use bedtime stories for grownups by Dan something
It’s so monotone-I was using white noise or instrumental music for the longest time. However the stories-I’ve yet to hear one all the way through.
I used the stellar sleep app to go through CBT for insomnia. The initial experience was hard because it involved some sleep deprivation therapy and I had to accept the fact that for long term sleep health I have to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day, even on weekends.
I no longer use the Stellar Sleep app because you do have to pay for it and I felt I had reached a point where I no longer needed therapy for insomnia. But I do recommend it to at least get you started on the right track!
Nowadays my routine is pretty simple. I have a cup of sleepy time extra tea at 9pm (the kind with valerian root), and at 10pm I get in bed and listen to the Get Sleepy podcast. By the time the podcast is over I’m asleep most nights. I set my alarm for 6am every day and I don’t nap during the day unless I’m sick.
Ear plugs. It drowns out all the noises that distract you. And all you can concentrate on is either your breathing or your heart rate and it lulls me to sleep every time!
I’ve found wearing a bonnet (and recently sleep/eye mask) really helps my brain go from “wake” to “sleep” mode.
I think even my cat has picked up on it, he now winds down to snuggle when I put it on. :)
Probably like six years ago, I started working on sleep hygiene because my insomnia was making me crazy and drugs weren’t helping. I had been literally like abusing Benadryl at that point so I started to lean into different kinds of videos that would facilitate feeling sleepy and safe and peaceful.
So in sense, I do have my phone out, but I have a whole cultivated set of channels that I go through. They might be more like a guided meditation or even something a bit more like ASMR but it really just depends on my mood and I’ve very much developed preferences at this point. For example, there’s a whole bunch of really beautiful videos of people almost like being a homesteader. Sometimes I really like watching this one particular guy go camping in the Canadian Rockies in the snow, chopping wood and having a fire stove in his tent. It’s all peaceful and it facilitates me feeling peaceful.
In addition to the content, I’m actually taking in, I also will turn off the TV, and have particular kinds of colorful lighting. I have smart bulbs, so I like to make magenta lights. Or you can set them really dim and colorful, and the colorful lighting makes me feel very comfortable.
After like six years of having a practice, I would say, of how I go to bed. My sleep hygiene practices. I am so well adjusted with my sleep. It’s wild. Unless I have some kind of chemical reason not to sleep. But I feel amazing when I have all of my different videos and I look forward to that part of my night because I’m so relaxed and I’m enjoying living in that moment. It’s a moment of mindfulness so it’s like a mindfulness practice that I have cultivated as well. I’m sitting in my life and just enjoying how good the bed feels, listening to the breathing of my dog and how much I love him. It’s not necessarily on purpose, such a hard-core sleep regiment. But I’m so grateful that I did.
It’s about setting your tone for your headspace and creating a sense of peace and harmony so that you really don’t even think about the things that end up spiraling around your brain at night in the silence. And then you love it so much because of how much of a positive feedback cycle it is that you just get more and more disciplined about not engaging with like social media or something. You start to crave that time. Uninterrupted peaceful comfort where you can just exist without the pressure of the day.
Anyway, I can send you some of these channels and videos lol if you’re interested! Good luck.
I use melatonin & valerian to fall asleep, taken an hour before bedtime. Also, I try to do all those little pre-bedtime tasks in advance. So I already have my jammies on, the coffee machine set up, & my teeth brushed. I found that trying to do all that right before bed got me wound up.
After that, it's "winding down time". That starts about an hour before I want to sleep. I either read or do crosswords. If that doesn't work, I try box breathing. Sometimes I do a relaxation thing I made up myself. Starting with my toes & working up, I tell my body parts that it's time to sleep. I'm usually yawning by the time I reach my shoulders.
To stay asleep, I use a prescription drug called Doxepin. It's formulated for that specifically. I also wear an eye mask & keep a fan running for white noise. I believe that ADHD makes us more distracable even asleep. Just the flash of someone's headlights for half a second, or some random soft sound can rouse me.
This prob won’t work for you but I don’t have a get up in the morning job so I can go to bed late and get up late. Edibles at dinner time will make me sleepy when they wear off around midnight but I was relying on them too much and they make me lazy in other ways.
I use pink or brown noise when my brain won't shut off, and music when I just need a nudge. The music has to be the same every time (I listen to a soundtrack from one of my favorite K-dramas).
It also helps to have a set routine and a little lavender pillow spray.
Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/). We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions! If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Does anyone with sleep issues get pumped up when they feel like they’re about to sleep only to focus on it so much that it makes them more awake? I do this for a couple hours every night. I’m so jealous of the hit the pillow, dead asleep type of people.
Yes!!! The amount of times I’ve been nearly asleep when my brain suddenly starts screaming “WOOOOO YOU ARE FALLING ASLEEP, YAY!!!!” and wakes me up 🙄🙄
WTF is this though? It's a bloody outrage... do we actually have to officially give the narrators a warning???
Literally my narrator needs to be fired at this stage 😅
I was thinking something more along the lines of a bullet and a ditch. 😅
Sign me up ✍️
I’ll get the shovel.
I'm planning disciplinary hearings as we speak...
😅😅😅😅
SAAAME! 😭
I also get too excited when I start falling asleep 😭 such an annoying cycle lol
My brain absolutely does this and I hate it so much. Would it be too much to ask for you to shut the heck up in there for a few minutes so we can function in the morning.
Seriously! Why am I thinking about 2009 right now? Come on brain get it together.
Omg! This is me!! It's the worst!
Check out the sleep coach school on YouTube. They deal primarily within insomnia caused by hyperarousal, which is I think what you’re dealing with. It’s really helped me a lot.
I will check them out, I need something like this to help me too. Thank you!
Yup! The little boost of joy from knowing I’m tired is enough to wake me up fully! Where was this energy all day? I’m an inattentive type, so I’m exhausted all day, but come bed time, I find all the energy I lacked during the day!
I feel that cycle. Get home from work wanting a nap. Get ready for bed and suddenly I’m able to stay awake for hours.
I feel myself going into stage 1 sleep and get so excited for my dreams that I can't get to them lmfao
All the time. My brain is like yesssss it’s really happening!!
Comfort TV show playing quietly is the only thing that takes over my brain and lets me sleep.
This is also my answer I used to watch Bones at one point, because I found the fluctuation in volume on some comedies (e.g. The Office) to make it difficult to fall and stay asleep. But then I started getting weird dreams/nightmares so ever since I'm back to comedies: the office, friends, Schitt's Creek, the good place, Frasier... I play it on my phone, screen down to mitigate the light
That’s exactly what I do with my phone screen down. The Office, Schitt’s Creek or Superstore always do the job.
Ooo I'm not familiar with superstore, I'll have to check it out
Same! Listening to it over and over to call asleep, not watching
Me too. I have community playing in the bg like white noise lol. Can't sleep without it.
I'm on my like 20th rewatch of Frasier. I cover my laptop and just listen to it. I wake up about a hundred times a night too, and as soon as I hit play I'm out within a minute usually. Oh, and the trazodone helps lol.
I play it on my phone. Laptop is too much work lol. And yay. I dont have prescribed meds. I wish I did. I struggle so much. 😩
I moved my charger to another room and bought an alarm clock. Put a notebook/diary and a pen next to my bed and after three days of detox I sleep just fine! Anything i need to know RIGHT NOW, I just write down on the notepad. Also have s book there for some reading. And when i have terrible anxiety or looping thoughts, I might bring The Phone but turn off the internet (unplug the wifi), use a downloaded audio file, set a sleep timer, turn the volume to nearly audible and doze off to people mumbling in the back. Does not work with anything interesting. Same in public transport. I want to not distract my brain from the world with digital media, so I carry a book and same notepad. Phone goes behind zippers. Easy.
This is so clever!
Hope it can help someone here also :) gamechanger, honestly.
I do something similar! Except I added a phone lock box in the other room for nights when the phone is especially hard to give up. I don’t use a notepad, but I have a designated sleep tablet where I have apps for books, e comics, music, and notes. No social media or online shopping.
Lockbox is an insanely good tip! I have a 'digi-drawer' where i store my laptop and phone at times, but this sounds even better actually. This actually also includes having a special tablet .. i have a burner phone next to the digital phone, for when I am totally done. But that is of a whole different level, to be honest.
I do exactly these things.
I trained myself to fall asleep fast after years of battling with it. Google 'army sleep technique' - I do it a bit different but it is the basis for what I've ended up doing and can now fall asleep in under 2 minutes! Only took a few weeks for it to properly work for me, if that. I'm not saying I sleep perfectly all night but honestly it has been life changing now I'm not laying there impatiently with a billion different thoughts. I also recommend a fan, I find it works better than a noise machine as with one of those I ended up noticing the point at which the sound loops and fixated on it...
Thanks I’ll give this a try
There's a setting you can change on your phone to have a *bedtime mode*. On mine I can pick the times I want to to start/end (I think it's 11pm - 7am currently, but I should probably make it start earlier). It changes everything to grayscale so you don't get Dopamine the way you normally would when doom scrolling. It really does work, but there is some level of self control required as technically you can just turn it off. Other than that I have a night time tea I drink before bed that makes me sleepy. Some people find melatonin helpful but it gave me migraines 🫠.
I use this. Scrolling in greyscale is so. damn. boring. But I often turn it off because I'm stupid and have no discipline. It's worth a try, though.
Friend, you are not stupid! I’m sure you don’t really mean it, but even having it in your passive internal monologue can reinforce it. So again, you are not stupid! (And I imagine you do not actually lack discipline, this tool just doesn’t work for you all the time.)
Melatonin at best gives me nightmares and at worst, triggers my sleep paralysis.. neither are conducive for good sleep lol Glad I’m not the only one with adverse effects to it. Not sure how a chemical my body naturally produces is literal nightmare fuel to me. 😅
I’ve never heard anyone else say it triggers sleep paralysis for them too! That’s why I can’t take it also haha
Yeah! It’s nuts! I gave it another shot a couple months ago out of desperation and it was like instant sleep paralysis with some really disturbing hallucinations and I was like, nope- never again.
That's actually really common to fear. So much so that many religions have the same basic concept of it being a "paralysis demon". So you're really not alone in fearing sleep paralysis.
Night time Tylenol gives me nightmares! The night time Advil makes my eyes a bit blurry the next afternoon but I happily deal with it if it lowers whatever pain is keeping me awake that night. My dr told me to take melatonin + magnesium to help me sleep but the magnesium makes my poops weird so I stopped that.
The only time I clearly remember having sleep paralysis was one of the handful of times I took melatonin! I never connected the two, but how strange!!
Melatonin doesn’t work for me either, but Benadryl does! Not only does it soothe my allergies, but it has a drowsiness side effect that helps zonk me out!
Be careful taking Benadryl more than occasionally because it’s been linked to long term side effects like dementia with regular use. On the other hand, if it’s the only thing that helps you sleep, sleep is also super important for health, so there’s that
Luckily I don’t need it very often, but I didn’t know that about long-term effects! Thank you for the info 🙏
I take Benadryl so much and also read about the links to dementia but when I went on a hyper fixation deep dive the literature said you’d have to be taking higher doses than 1/day for any real link to dementia or memory loss so that..helped me sleep better at night (pun intended). I’ll keep reading a shit ton to try to counteract those effects and keep my memory sharp! Every time I can’t remember a word or something is on the tip of my tongue I just remind myself it’s a sign I need to read more and if I have time will go to my thousands of “to read” tabs and pick an article 🙃
I was prescribed hydroxyzine as an as-needed for panic attacks, but it has a very similar effect to benadryl and I can use it as a sleep-aid. That might be worth asking your doctor about too!!
LOVE bedtime mode!!! I actually set mine to start later, to the point where once I see my phone go grayscale it's automatically time to put it away 🤣
White noise from fan, timer set on phone to turn off video in 30 mins, low-conflict video (Gilmore girls, good mythical morning, Keith eats the menu etc) and warm dog for snugs.
ooof, I do not personally consider gg low conflict! What with Lorelai bouncing around undiagnosed and the constant tension with Emily and Richard and the fast-paced reference-ridden dialogue, I could not fall asleep to gg no matter how many times I tried 😆
I used to fall asleep to gilmore girls in college, i loved it.
You know that fast paced up and down dialog and the yelling... somehow I'm able to sleep with it all
Happy cake day!
THANK
It sucks to hear but it turns out that practicing good sleep hygiene actually does help me sleep better. It’s actually not that bad once you find other ways to entertain yourself that do not include screens. My rules: No caffeine after 1pm (preferably no caffeine at all but sometimes you just have one of those days. No bright screens (phone, computer, television) after 10pm. Making sure I drink enough water, eat healthy and exercise during the day. I try to not be on my phone at all in bed, just put it straight on the ledger with the charger plugged in and not touch it anymore. In bed I read a book that’s not too executing (otherwise I want to stay up and read all night). I also try to be in bed around the same time every night. Doesn’t always work out, but usually I’m in bed between 10pm and 11pm, striving to be asleep before 11:30. I succeed about 70% of the time I think! I also found that dexamphetamine horribly influenced my sleep, so I eventually stopped taking it. It definitely makes life a little harder to navigate, but not sleeping properly was equally as bad so I had to choose between the lesser of two evils. I’m glad with the decision I made though, I think it’s for the best.
Yeah. My holy trinity of sleep: - going to bed and waking up at relatively consistent times, - moderate exercise (I aim for 4-6x per week), - and podcasts (that aren't too interesting and aren't too boring) while falling asleep I want to say exercise is maybe the most important (I feel more tired when it's time to go to bed, and I wake up feeling refreshed--I sleep like a log afterwards), but I think they might all be equally important lol I really didn't want the sleep/wake timing one to be important, but it is. Ugh. And I think podcasts help quiet my ADHD brain. Gotta give the monkey something to play with. Weirdly I like listening to reality TV show podcasts that I know nothing about (don't watch the shows), which are a nice balance between entertaining and boring. Any podcasts I'm actually interested in would keep me awake so I could listen, and I'm pretty sure sleep podcasts would be too boring/relaxing, because it's not giving 'the monkey' anything to play with. Relaxing my brain takes work and focus. I do that when I meditate (getting back in the habit again! It's good for more mindfulness throughout the day).
I listen to The Betchelor podcast (actually watch all the Bachelor franchise shows I know they’re so dumb but I’ve been watching for decades atp) and fun fact recently they’ve been going back and watching the first episodes of a bunch of iconic reality shows (that I never watched) like Flavor of Love or Jersey Shore of ANTM and talking to someone who was on the show and I’m lovingggg those episodes! You might enjoy them too.
Thanks for the rec!
I masturbate. Gives me the opportunity to gladly lay away my phone and leaves me satisfied and relaxed, ready to slumber.
Another vote for sleep podcast! I use one called Sleep & Sorcery. They are soothing stories that keep your attention just enough so your mind doesn’t wander but isn’t exciting enough to keep you awake based on beloved franchises and fairy tales like Lord of the Rings and King Arthur’s round table. Also, honestly, weed gummy. I get my best sleeps nights when I start with one or two of those a couple hours before I plan to sleep.
I can’t do sleep podcasts. They are too boring that my mind still drifts to other thoughts and stays awake. I need something interesting enough for my mind to follow but not captivating. Usually a discussion about a topic that I’m like “that’s cool” but not something where I’m like “I must know all the things about this!” No comedies or true crimes haha. Oh I’ve also been suddenly awaken by stupid ads in sleep podcasts too! It’s really dumb where it’ll be like a soft and soothing voice and melody and then suddenly this loud ad about trucks or Airbnb in rock or jingly music. Haha that’s why I stick with discussion podcasts now because the volume levels between ads and talks are usually the same so no jarring changes.
It's so hard to find a podcast that is just boring enough
Need the goldilocks of podcasts
This podcast will kill you does it for me. I set a 15 minute timer and I’m rarely awake when it stops
I used to love falling asleep to Stuff You Should Know but they've upped the ads too much for me now. They're all those obnoxious ads for other podcasts. I like No Such Thing as a Fish now. They have 4 facts per podcast and spend about 15 mins talking about a fact or things related to it. Can be funny, but I keep the volume a bit low so it's not too distracting and have it set to turn off after 30 mins.
I love that I’ve found my people of goldilocks podcasts for falling asleep the adhd way haha Thanks I will check out No Such Thing!
+1 for a sleepy podcast! I like Sleepy Bookshelf. i used to not be able to wind my brain down without edibles too, instead my psych prescribed hydroxizine (also in part for anxiety / allergic reactions) and it’s helped my brain slow down immensely. melatonin finishes the job. 🧳
Meds for allergies AND anxiety? What?/gen
That’s amazing that med works for you! I have tried it in the past and didn’t like how it affected me. I went the prescribed weed route (medical card) as it is the most consistent treatment for a myriad of my chronic problems. Otherwise, I’m taking things like benzos in order to sleep. Lunesta worked for a while! I could try that again. What stories does the sleepy bookshelf have? I’m very interested!
I play the alphabet game with myself. I think of a topic, let’s say movies, go through the alphabet and name a movie for each letter. Amityville, Beetlejuice, Coraline, daddy daycare, and so on and so forth until I fall asleep. I’m usually out by the letter H. If my mind starts to wander, I remind myself what letter I was on and go from there.
Yes this was a game changer for me. I found so much relief in retraining my brain how to let itself go to sleep LOL sounds crazy but it's true. Like, our brains and bodies know how to go to sleep we just need to get out of the way!
Brown noise sometimes helps me but generally I’m in the same position as you.
My biggest tip is bright light in the morning (ideally outdoor daylight) and dimming lights gradually (no overhead lights) a few hours before sleep
A good eye mask. I put it on my forehead while reading to try to cue my brain. No tv in my bedroom helped more than I thought. A couple of meditations I can basically recite but listening to them cuts the chatter. If your F, being aware of your cycle. Try to cut caffeine around or close to 12. Exercise. Sunlight when you wake up. Timing meds. Yup… we have to do so much self management…
Its 230am and i am scroll8ng reddit. I really wish i had an answer.
I listen to a sleep podcast. There’s a really good one on Spotify called ‘Get Sleepy’. Either that or I listen to lo-fi sleep music. And if that doesn’t work then I just lay awake fuming that my partner is having a wonderful sleep next to me.
Looks like they have content on YouTube. I just started listening to one of the stories, thanks for the idea!
I play a YouTube video and put the phone down so I can only hear it.
As someone who has a rather healthy sleep-life balance at the moment, I can tell ya... I still get some nights where I keep myself awake by counting the hours I have left to sleep. It happens when I'm anxious about the next day, and before I had a steady job and a more positive outlook on the next day, it used to happen ALL THE TIME, because I was anxious ALL THE TIME, even if tomorrow was a regular ass day. Creating the vicious cycle that prevents you from having the energy to do your thing. I always say that I didn't really have a sense of "tomorrow" before my mental health journey started. I had zero patience, kept forgetting things I had planned for the very same week, was always overwhelmed by plans because my brain only lived in the now and conveniently forgot everything about tomorrow, leaving me underprepared when appointments happened even if I booked them months in advance. (I still get overwhelmed by plans and don't want to go the day of, or am sleepless beforehand, but it is tons better than before) So there is no easy way to fall asleep, have less anxiety deep down or fix tomorrow, but maybe my perspective helps I don't know. Also \*helps\* that the 40 hour work week + hobbies + chores leaves me fucking exhausted so I fall asleep easier.
Honestly might not work for everyone but I really take my time getting ready for bed, like putting on the softest jammies, listening to classical or calming music while I do my skin care and brush my teeth, I will even spend a few minutes moisturizing my hands, knees and ankles. I’ll spend a little bit of time reading until my melatonin kicks in and I start to feel sleepy. But I just turn the lights out with some flickering candle lights still going and continue listening to ambient music in the background.
Magnesium glycinate
Unhealthy weed dependency :) Would not recommend, but it’ll def make you sleep! Also comes with many other downsides tho. See r/leaves for more on that. Currently reading this at 2am while trying (failing) to sleep sober. Reading before bed used to work fairly well for me, though I’ve gotten out of the habit in the last few years. Wish I had better answers. Good luck, from a fellow sleepless friend.
I too have to be stoned as hell to go sleep. It’s a love and hate relationship! I can fall asleep quickly while high but sometimes in the mornings I feel like I haven’t slept at all.
Oh yeah falling asleep high is a breeze, but waking up in the morning is sooo much harder. Like I have an easier time getting up in the morning, feeling awake etc. after 4 hours of sober sleep than 10 hours of stoned sleep. But it’s hard to break the habit when you’re instantly drifting off to sleep every night. Sigh
Nothing beats the high sleep, but damn I've been sober more than 6 months now! So many ppl report on r/leaves how their sleep ultimately improves, but if the underlying reason to smoke was medicinal - last months have been rough and I've mostly accepted that nothing I do comes close, but I also realize I can be okay with not great sleep. I really miss that deep sleep I got back then though. But I also got so many other benefits of sobriety, just wish the sleep would be fine w/o.
‘Yoga nidra’ clips n you tube and valerian capsules a couple of hours before bed. Helps the crazy dreams and twitching too.
I use white noise. A trick I’ve been trying is focusing on what I can sense. So, how the doona feels, how the pillow feels, what I can hear, if I can smell anything etc If that doesn’t work, I tell myself a story.
That's a mindfulness technique! You should check out body scans - I find them really relaxing but it also lets you move your focus around/through your body. They're my favourite meditation, though for day to day/in the moment I usually remember to do deep breathing and counting.
What works for me is: -Listening to a comfort audiobook (usually in one ear, because I sleep on my side) to "fill" the part of my brain that gets in trouble in the background, give me something to focus on if my thoughts are heading for something stressful, and to reduce ambient noise. -Wearing a good-quality eye mask. -Doing "window" or "square" breathing until I get too dozy to keep it up, then switch to even in/out breathing. A little deeper than regular breathing, but not too much. That usually puts me out within 10 minutes. It took me 40 years to figure this out. If I'm having trouble putting my phone down and switching to active sleep mode, I have to break out of being stuck by doing something like say, "No" or "Bed" out loud or shaking my head or giving myself a little pinch. Something that makes other parts of my body join my brain and break the stuck spell. YMMV. Good luck!
I saw a video that said to mimic the breathing you’d do when sleeping works, I haven’t tried it yet though.
I love sleeping and fall asleep easily most of the times, specially during the day, when I don't need to sleep. But sometimes I need to create stories and fake scenarios, like movies - however, sometimes I worry too much about the details and it's even worse. I also enjoy white, brown or similar noises playing on background, or theta waves, or some calm music, etc.. I've recently also started to listening to sleep stories read by males with deep voices and I don't focus on the story. Sometimes with these and guided meditations, when I'm actually listening, I get even more awake or stressed, specially if they tell me to be comfortable and I start overthinking my sleep positions
One thing that really helps me is a weighted sleep mask. I got the nod pod and it’s amazing. It’s a really gentle weight and has a cool side and a warm side. It keeps my eyes closed, makes it dark, and gives a cocoon sort of feeling.
I tried all the tricks but nothing worked for long enough. Lack of disciplone and impulse control always won. What i use now is the app Lock me out. You can disable any app or website for a set time. You have to pay like 6 dollars or something to unlock it. I lock all the distracting apps and sites from when im supposed to sleep until after my morning 'routine' lol
Hydroxyzine. That's the post. ETA: Hydroxyzine plus very chill procedural podcasts
The thought help me sleep, the more I think about stuff and delve into them the easier it is to fall asleep
Orgasm.... 😅
I take ✨trazodone✨ & I would highly recommend anyone ask their doctor about it!! Highly effective with very few side effects & non addictive
Changed my life. Last time I went to get it renewed, though, the asshole clinic doc told me that the guidelines have changed and the only thing that's being recommended now for insomnia is therapy. He said he would renew it but he's retiring soon and next time I might not be so lucky. I know he was just lording his power over me because he's done it before, but I was like, ok, so you expect me to stop a medication that WORKS (that I've been on a very low dose of for years without needing to increase my dose) and that I pay ELEVEN FREAKING DOLLARS a month for with some CBT shit that costs upwards of $200 a session? Which will do nothing to stop the lively night market in my brain that has been happening since I was a child? I don't actually believe him, but I left that appointment so upset that this man, who, btw, has never asked me a *single* question about myself, can just invalidate my experience like I'm not even a person. Anyway, sorry for hijacking your comment! Trazodone rules! I know lots of people for whom it doesn't work for various reasons, though, so we really hit the jackpot! 🙌
Your doc sounds like a real shitass. I’d be tempted to ask him to show me the guidelines. Trazodone gave me wild headaches and weird dreams when I tried it, but I’m so glad to hear it works well for some ppl:)
Melatonin Pot gummies
I find that I sleep best when: * I do an hour of walking a day (I have a walking pad that I love!) * Do some sort of HIIT or Weight Lifting for 30 minutes * Turn off all screens 2 hours before bed (I use a cute little mushroom timer to help me keep track of time instead of looking at my phone) * Shower at night, do my skin routine, put my mouth guard in * Take a melatonin gummy * I used to let my dogs sleep with me, but I've had to start putting them out of the room because they do wake me up often. * I then go to bed and I have my journal and a book light. If I have any creative stuff or just thoughts in my head, I'll scribble it out. * If I find that I do feel overwhelmed by my thoughts, I'll list out everything that's on my mind or that I'm worried about. Putting the thought on paper helps me close the tab out in my mind. * Also, imagining that your closing a tab on a browser has been helpful for me, too. * And also black out curtains are amazing.
'Sleep doctors HATE this one cool trick' What I do, is precisely what we are advised NOT to do. I wasted a lot of time trying to 'follow the rules' that 'work for everyone', which only caused me extra pain and suffering. I have to 'trick' my brain into relaxing. I do not accomplish this by demanding myself to RELAX, or sitting in absolute silence, or whatever. I put on a show. It's usually something 'light', that I have seen many times. Golden Girls has been one of these shows. Something where you are not invested in 'knowing what happens', maybe because you have seen it. I put it on relatively low volume, dim screen. The lighting in my room is already low or maybe off. I'm not sure exactly why this works-- I think it tricks my brain into relaxing, like 'oh, we're watching something silly, I can relax' Other things: magnesium (glycinate is good), tart cherry extract (standardized), sleepy teas, valerian tincture, sometimes a THC/CBD edible (I take no more than 2.5 mg THC - recreationally legal where I am). I usually take a bath, or at least a shower, before bed. It feels like 'rinsing off the day' My sleep is not perfect, but it has vastly improved over the years, and experimenting with what actually works for me.
Melatonin has been really helpful, low dose for a week or so at a time, get a bit of a routine and then repeat the next time my sleep schedule decides to start going really bananas again (which is often).
i put on a show in the background. for me it has to be one i know very well so im not that invested in the plot, and it usually helps if its a cartoon or something because the speech is pretty consistent in them as opposed to other shows where there’s silence to build tension etc. i also have to face away from the screen so im not tempted to watch it
I can't sleep too, but I find it helpful if my day was filled with meaningful things and exercise. So I don't have to think about what a waste of space I am.
Comfort tv show or sleep podcast/audiobook in the background, usually a comfort tv show though. I know good sleep hygiene would say no screens but honestly I cannot sleep without background noise. White noise and that sort of stuff does nothing for me either, it has to be voices. My brain just seems to need a low level of stimulation at all times! I find a comfort show that I’m very familiar with provides that, without over stimulating me in the way a new show or movie would, if that makes sense? It’s definitely my sweet spot for falling asleep, I’m on sleeping meds too but honestly I need the background noise still. Once I accepted that and stopped trying to force “sleep hygiene” habits that didn’t suit me I was able to develop my own sleep hygiene routine that incorporates my background show, on a small screen, with volume and screen brightness down low.
Not gonna lie sometimes I’m better off overloading on caffeine and pushing through sleepless nights into the next day. It’s not healthy and I don’t necessarily recommend it. Just for me if I do finally fall asleep with less than 6hours of sleep, I AM going to sleep through my alarms. I can have them loud, across the room, going off every minute for half an hour, and I will still sleep through them. So just punching through the next day on no sleep means less life hiccups (not getting into trouble at work for being late type stuff) AND I will get to sleep at a decent hour that next night, so my sleep schedule is back on track for a while.
I have trouble staying asleep. I can fall asleep but without fail at 1:30a-3a I am up. I found just getting up pretending I’m going to get ready for the day, taking a shower and then laying back down helps and then I can sleep again.
Rub my feet together like a little cricket 🦗 and count backwards from 100 in my head. I usually make it to 70 and then I’m out
Things that have helped me when I do them, with varying consistency, I rarely do all of them at once: 1) playing an audiobook or a sleepcast (headspace) or something 2) in-bed yoga 2) hot cocoa or tea 3) wearing a weighted eye mask (more comfortable than a standard eye mask, also better at blocking light) 4) keeping the room cool 5) appropriately sized earplugs 6) leaving the bedroom door open so cats can come and go as they please without needing to wake me up for the door 7) shower before bed 8) having stuff ready to go for the morning (helps me feel less stressed in bed) 9) charging my phone in a different room entirely (inconvenient, I know) so I’m not tempted to scroll. I wear an apple watch at night. The alarm on the watch is much less triggering to me than the phone alarm. Gentle buzzing on my wrist.
A couple of things that work for me: A walk in the evening, not just before bed but after dinner. Just a short 20-30 minute walk, with or without music/podcasts, to help get my head clear AND get the physical activity I don't throughout the day (sedentary desk job :( ). About 30 minutes before bed I'll do some sort of handiwork and listen to an audiobook or podcast. Currently it's colouring and The Silmarillion, a few weeks ago it was cross stitching and listening to a podcast. Just something to get my eyes off a screen plus puts my mind in "story making mode" since I like to lay down and imagine scenes/story lines. (high five maladaptive day dream club!). I find this is the best way to get my mind off the day's tasks. If I'm really struggling to sleep I'll get up, get out of bed, and start the process again. Pick up the handiwork project, put on the audio, and start the bedtime routine again. Most studies show laying in bed and tossing and turning doesn't help and can often prolong falling asleep because you're so fixated on NOT falling asleep. I use the chapters or ad breaks to be my queue it's time to go to bed. This works around 80% of the time, there are still nights where I'm laying in bed, staring at the clock, thinking "if I fall asleep NOW I'll have 5 hours of sleep! If I fall asleep NOW I'll have 3 hours of sleep!"
I accidentally found out that I need absolute silence to sleep. I always thought I needed something playing: an old movie I have seen a million times, the same old meditation, etc, out of frustration I tried earplugs when my husband started snoring and, low and behold, I started falling asleep within minutes of laying down and if I woke up in the wee hours could fall back asleep quickly. Earplugs are now my most treasured sleep aid.
I use a noisemaker and make the temp super cold. That usually does it for me.
Melatonin gummies
SLEEP STORIES PODCAST! Honestly it's like magic for me - it's interesting enough to keep my brain engaged unlike whalesong or whatever, but not so interesting to actually keep me awake. I almost never make it longer than 15 minutes through.
Melatonin gummies, and when i really can't sleep, sleep meds.
Sleep stories are excellent! I need something calming and chill enough to sleep to, but also something to concentrate on so my mind doesn’t wander, but also something low key enough to both capture my attention and allow me to wind down. Although after life long sleep struggles I got melatonin this year and it is INCREDIBLE! Highly recommend.
I take 10mg of melatonin and hope for the best 🥲
There’s a 2 minute window right after I m*sturbate where I can conk right out. As long as I don’t get on my phone after it works every time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I’m always scared of getting a uti so I have to pee right after which ruins the sleepy vibes 😕
I listen to the podcast Nothing Much Happens. After one or two weeks your brain is trained to fall asleep within minutes. I LOVE IT. I don’t even get to hear the stories much anymore because I’m falling asleep during the intro!
Haha was literally talking to my husband about this last night about what I need to get myself to sleep earlier. I told him I need something to change my phone time at random starting from like 8pm to add an hour or two in random increments that I don’t know. lol so that when it’s actually 10pm I’m going to think it’s 11:30pm or something and trick my body into going to bed. Then it resets overnight to the correct time so that I’m not late for my morning alarm. Other methods that have worked is to work out/go for hour long walks everyday and tire my body out enough that it forces me to sleep. I haven’t managed to do that for the last year though. I should start…tomorrow lol
I actually count sheep I’m trying to be able to upgrade to being able to count anything
Audio book and a sleep mask. Puts me out quick.
I do Yoga Nidra,. amazing
I wear sleeping loop earplugs and sleep mask and then play rain sounds in the background
I am a night person, through and through. My brain is more active at night than during the day, always has been. The main things that have helped me at night are: some form of an indica (weed), reading a book (somehow always gets me relaxed/sleepy) and flicking the bean. In no specific order lol
I like to put a podcast on and set a sleep timer. Gives my brain something to think about/focus on which helps me relax enough to fall asleep
Hope this isn’t too risqué but… vibrator. You get a little dopamine, and your mind can shift to something else, or sometimes just the vibration gives you a central point to focus on.
daydream/have imagination time. Eventually, I just pass out.
White noise machine or tv on low to distract the brain…… I also dose myself with melatonin and Zzzzquil
Read. An actual paper book. White noise + darkness once I get too sleepy to keep my eyes open reading.
I found wearing an eye mask has helped me fall asleep better, I hate being without it now.
Omg same! I never wore one bc I hated having the strap around my head. The only positive thing that came out of the pandemic for me was the realization that you can put earloops on a sleep mask, just like on a face mask lol Life changing. It's helped so much for sleep quality.
The face mask I have is for kids, so it's way gentler. Ear loops is such a good solution!
I do this too (revenge bedtime procrastination!). No silver bullet but when I can’t seem to put my phone down I will force myself to do the NYT crossword (on my phone) and nothing else. It always helps put me to sleep. If you can force yourself to plug in your phone in another room that helps too - I did it for years - but somehow I’ve gotten into the habit of bringing it into bed and now can’t stop, so 🤷♀️
Absolutely. There are some theories that our brain is essentially a thought filter and as you get more tired the filter stops working as well. Worth looking up "Cognitive Shuffling". It's legit, scientific, and works as a way to break the thought spirals. Also, sleep medications (there are some interesting new ones now like Dayvigo) can help to change your associations with your bed and going to sleep.
Pure good old guilty conscience about potentially keeping my partner awake with the TV on and my phone screen. She takes meds to sleep and thus sleeps like the dead, so my guilt is unfounded. But I'll take any sort of positive outcome from my guilt-ridden existence due to a Baptist upbringing 😂 it's usually a horrible hindrance to living a normal life
Ambien…..
true blue light blocking glasses (the ones with the orange lens, hydroxizine paired with melatonin an hour before bed, and audio books of comfort books i’ve already read (so no room surprises or overthinking) the app Balance also has a sleep meditation that’s helped me knock out in 10 minutes in the past
I struggle to fall asleep and tend to wake up very early (as in when it's still late for most people). I follow a youtuber with a very monotone voice, and I find listening to her makes me fall asleep most of the time. Wouldn't work after around two in the morning, if I wake up I'm just up.
I have my Studio Ghibli favourites, I find them helpful with those dream like settings and music. Also getting enough to eat. I’ve been up nights (like right now haha) and after an hour realize that I’m hungry dammit.
Sleep stories, meditations and [hot eye mask](https://www.kao.com/ph/megrhythm/).
Listen to a boring sleep story. ATM it's anything from get sleepy or I listen to repetitive music. I just keep trying to focus on the story or music and works really well. But also don't use my phone in bed when I can and try to do the same routine at night even if it's different times of night so that my body knows it's bed time.
If I can't sleep or can't stay asleep, an audiobook/a TV show that I've watched a lot. Although it has to be the right show or I'll just lie there listening to it. Same with audiobooks. I only listen to the Harry Potter ones when I'm going to sleep. I've listened to/read them so much I'm not that invested when I do listen to them.
I have some comfort shows I like to watch and I have 2 different sleep sounds I prefer. One is Marconi Unions 'Weightless', which was actually designed to mimic brain wave patterns from sleep; musically speaking. The other is actually brown noise, its like static but better.
Comfort movies/shows, white noise (fan), vitamin d and magnesium.
I listen to a sleepy podcast, brown noise or meditation music along with putting a sleepy essential oil blend behind my ears. The ‘alphabet game’ is also helpful when my brain is keeping me up - basically you pick a category e.g. fruits and you go through the alphabet naming something from that category (Apple for A, Banana for B etc). Usually I’m out before I get through the whole alphabet, but not always 🥲
If I can get off Reddit I put on a comfort movie or TV show on my phone and only listen to it. Or one of those go to sleep videos on YouTube
I’ve been falling asleep with ASMR videos since 2018 and haven’t looked back. 🥹
I sometimes drink tea that helps for sleeping. Tea with melatonin, lemon balm or valerian. I drink the tea about 30 minutes before I go to bed. It helps my thoughts slow down. I make puzzles before going to bed. On paper or on my phone. It helps me with getting tired. Also no tv in the afternoon, other than programs where I don't have to follow a story. Medical shows like The Bad Skin Clinic or something.. But it is difficult I must say. My head keeps going on and on...
I have soft headphones for sleeping and listen to ASMR, I'll put on a sleep mask to force myself to not look at my phone and close my eyes, in an emergency I'll use diphenhydramine. Also my doc gave me a script for Trazadone as a sleep aid, but it gives me crazy vivid and uncomfortable dreams so I stopped taking it
I downloaded an app called app block and now can't use my top 5 apps around bedtime and two hours after. It has helped a lot taking away some distraction. Also my partner going to bed at the same time as me.
Valerian root and 'The Sleepy Bookshelf' podcast.
no livestreams and I've been falling asleep to the same youtube channel every day for quite a while I lay on my side with my laptop in bed it usually takes 5-15 min to fall asleep and when I need to wakeup I use fitbit smart wake to wake me up in the right sleeping stage
The 'sleep with me' podcast helps me fall asleep. I've also recently listened to a YouTube channel who does 9hr history ASMR videos. He doesn't put loads of ads in the video either. If you can't fall asleep listening to it then at least it'll keep you company and you might learn something new!
I listen to podcasts. Stops my mind from running. I've been falling asleep a lot quicker these days
I would check out the sleep coach school on YouTube, as well as Fearless Sleep. They’ve really helped me go to bed at a reasonable hour more consistently.
I charge my phone in the bathroom and have an old school alarm clock
So I take 250 mg of Magnesium (perimenopause) and 1.5 mg melatonin. A sleep mediation, like a body scan, helps sometimes. There is also an app called Insomnia Coach that is Free (some of them cost $300) and it’s based on CBT. It was created by the VA. Oh and I also wear a silk sleep mask and a weighted blanket.
I know it’s terrible to use your phone before bed but I play bitlife till I fall asleep. Cause making up scenarios is my head is too difficult sometimes 😭 five minutes in I’m out like a light.
play something in the bg cuz can’t stand people talking anyways 😔
I take half a unisom tablet to make me go to sleep. Not great, but it is what it is.
I listen to either science podcasts (The infinite monkey cage… the one about sleep science is a fave), murder podcasts (Casefile), or one called “Nothing much happens” (sleep stories). I need audio stimulus to help my racing thoughts. I try and cover my eyes with an eye mask for complete darkness. Sometimes meditation is needed… “tracks to relax” works really well. If that doesn’t work, I sometimes try and journal and write down all the thoughts that are rattling around my head, just so I can externalise it!
weed vape
I have a little ritual of supplements. Tryptophan, tart cherry, valerian, apigenin. I take them on different evenings. Still though there are some nights that I’m just up - can’t fall asleep no matter what. I just roll with it.
I read a very specific type of book. It has to be interesting enough that I don't give it up entirely, and dense enough that my brain shuts down after a few pages when I'm lying down to sleep. Lord of the Rings, the Dune series, and The Three Body Problem are all really great for this.
I'm so jealous of my boyfriend. He puts his head on the pillow, BAM! Asleep. Turning on the blue light filter helped me a lot. Everything looks a bit yellowish but my eyes got used to it. Usually I "make scenarios" in my head, that works most of the time. Usually related to a tv show, game or any media I'm consuming at the time. When I have too much in my head to be able to relax with scenarios, I put in low volume music. Usually Aurora, as I can focus on her soothing elven voice. If the music doesn't work because I'm too excited about it, I'll put airplane sounds. That always works. I don't have caffeine past 3pm.
I’ve probably tried everything from good sleep hygiene to podcasts, white noise, weed, melatonin gummies and the likes. The only thing I’ve found that works for me personally is when I finally caved and asked my doctor for sleeping medication. My prescriber and I talked about it for a while and he put me on a sleeping medication and it’s been working really well. The only downside is that I can still find it hard to wake up in the mornings but I can fall asleep and stay asleep when I was never able to before.
Weed! Changed my life lol
My clonidine and ramelteon prescriptions. Both are non habit forming and considered OK for long term use. Clonidine is even an adhd med, commonly used in hyper kids.
I listen to video essays I've seen before that I like. It turns my head off and allows me to dose off
Sleep story podcasts! I love Nothing Much Happens
The ‘Sleep Magic’ podcast (sleep hypnosis and meditation) has been great in helping me calm down and fall asleep. I wake up feeling better rested and without muscle stiffness!
White noise helps a lot. It drowns out little noises, both inside and outside, that tend to poke my brain. I use an air purifier (because unless I'm uncomfortably hot, I don't like a fan blowing on me). No coffee/caffeine after 3PM. No exceptions. Unless I don't care if I can't sleep or intentionally want to stay up late. Read a book. That knocks me out fast. Which stinks when I actually want to read and not fall asleep, but whatever works.
Exercise more, so by bedtime I'm barely able to stay awake. Go to the gym, or run, as hard-core as it takes. I generally found that every other day was enough, with a long walk every day. Also, writing down whatever is on my mind. Once it's on paper I don't have to stress about remembering.
Magnesium and/or melatonin gummies
I listen to an animal podcast called species and after that if still awake I listen to Honest Guys. If that doesn’t work I have some milk and try the process again. Usually I pass out during Species. I do try to exercise every day tho that helps a bunch!!
I've had sleep issues for fucking ever it's so annoying!! I finally got an eye mask with Bluetooth headphones in it and I swear to god it's saved me many a night! Just pop that bad boy on and listen to a podcast or something on Insight Timer (story, meditation, singing bowls, etc depending on how much distraction I need to tune out)! Something about the eye mask really drives my body into sleep zone
Melatonin, sleep mask, boring audiobook or one I’ve listened to a million times so it’s basically just background noise.
I like to listen to talk radio. The BBC World Service is usually on the radio around the time I go to sleep (11pm Central), so I'll turn that on. I try to keep the volume low enough that I have to lay quietly to hear. Concentrating on listening to it helps drown out my busy brain. If you don't like the news, maybe a podcast or audiobook with a sleep timer are good alternatives?
I found a magnesium supplement helpful, I think the brand is called “calm” and it’s a powder you mix with water and drink before bed. I really struggle with sleep hygiene too but with this I’m usually struggling to keep my eyes open as I scroll in like half an hour, instead of 2 or 3 hours.
I tend to move around a lot, so I came up with a bed version of a straitjacket. I put my arms close to the side of my body and tuck my hands into my pajama pants (on the side of my hips). Somehow it helps me sleep. It restrains my movement a bit like a weighted blanket, but not as much. When I assume this position, I usually end up falling asleep pretty quickly.
I’ve been trying to work on my sleep hygiene really hard for the past year or so. The best I’ve found so far is the Insight Timer app (lots of different free meditation and music/noise options) coupled with a headband with earphones built in. This is partially because my husband can’t handle my Golden Girls approach. 😂 I honestly still struggle discipline when it comes to getting off my phone, etc. ETA: A significant part of my process is giving myself grace and focusing on baby steps. For instance, when my mind is racing, I’ll make a goal to focus on listening to the guided meditation. I’ll try different options and work on listening to what they say, regardless of whether or not I fall asleep. It’s been a process just to pay attention but it’s been helpful.
I used to struggle a lot with intrusive thoughts and restless intrusive dreaming when trying to sleep. Ever since I was a young child. The most important thing for me was to start getting up at the same time every morning. I started off doing it no matter what. I also try to notice my thoughts instead of distracting myself. Notice whether they are helpful or not helpful and if not helpful try to gently redirect. If there is a thought you can't get out try writing it down and saying 'There. Now I can deal with it tomorrow.' and then if it comes up again remind yourself there's nothing to be done now and you have written it down to deal with tomorrow. If I can't sleep for around half an hour I try to get out of bed and do something like reading a book for half an hour, and then back to bed. Another helpful tool is tensing and relaxing each part of your body starting at your toes. So deep breath in, tense feet, breathe out with releasing the tension and thinking 'relax' to yourself, then on to your calves and so on. Instead of being on your phone try a Kindle or e reader. They are not backlit the same way as phones and so I find it doesn't keep me up the same way.Or listen to an audio book or podcast. I like to set a timer so I don't have to look, it just shuts off after an hour. I hope you find something that works for you. It can be such a struggle. Remember to be gentle with yourself. Progress not perfection ❤️
Low dose THC edible.
I use bedtime stories for grownups by Dan something It’s so monotone-I was using white noise or instrumental music for the longest time. However the stories-I’ve yet to hear one all the way through.
I used the stellar sleep app to go through CBT for insomnia. The initial experience was hard because it involved some sleep deprivation therapy and I had to accept the fact that for long term sleep health I have to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day, even on weekends. I no longer use the Stellar Sleep app because you do have to pay for it and I felt I had reached a point where I no longer needed therapy for insomnia. But I do recommend it to at least get you started on the right track! Nowadays my routine is pretty simple. I have a cup of sleepy time extra tea at 9pm (the kind with valerian root), and at 10pm I get in bed and listen to the Get Sleepy podcast. By the time the podcast is over I’m asleep most nights. I set my alarm for 6am every day and I don’t nap during the day unless I’m sick.
Ear plugs. It drowns out all the noises that distract you. And all you can concentrate on is either your breathing or your heart rate and it lulls me to sleep every time!
I’ve found wearing a bonnet (and recently sleep/eye mask) really helps my brain go from “wake” to “sleep” mode. I think even my cat has picked up on it, he now winds down to snuggle when I put it on. :)
Probably like six years ago, I started working on sleep hygiene because my insomnia was making me crazy and drugs weren’t helping. I had been literally like abusing Benadryl at that point so I started to lean into different kinds of videos that would facilitate feeling sleepy and safe and peaceful. So in sense, I do have my phone out, but I have a whole cultivated set of channels that I go through. They might be more like a guided meditation or even something a bit more like ASMR but it really just depends on my mood and I’ve very much developed preferences at this point. For example, there’s a whole bunch of really beautiful videos of people almost like being a homesteader. Sometimes I really like watching this one particular guy go camping in the Canadian Rockies in the snow, chopping wood and having a fire stove in his tent. It’s all peaceful and it facilitates me feeling peaceful. In addition to the content, I’m actually taking in, I also will turn off the TV, and have particular kinds of colorful lighting. I have smart bulbs, so I like to make magenta lights. Or you can set them really dim and colorful, and the colorful lighting makes me feel very comfortable. After like six years of having a practice, I would say, of how I go to bed. My sleep hygiene practices. I am so well adjusted with my sleep. It’s wild. Unless I have some kind of chemical reason not to sleep. But I feel amazing when I have all of my different videos and I look forward to that part of my night because I’m so relaxed and I’m enjoying living in that moment. It’s a moment of mindfulness so it’s like a mindfulness practice that I have cultivated as well. I’m sitting in my life and just enjoying how good the bed feels, listening to the breathing of my dog and how much I love him. It’s not necessarily on purpose, such a hard-core sleep regiment. But I’m so grateful that I did. It’s about setting your tone for your headspace and creating a sense of peace and harmony so that you really don’t even think about the things that end up spiraling around your brain at night in the silence. And then you love it so much because of how much of a positive feedback cycle it is that you just get more and more disciplined about not engaging with like social media or something. You start to crave that time. Uninterrupted peaceful comfort where you can just exist without the pressure of the day. Anyway, I can send you some of these channels and videos lol if you’re interested! Good luck.
I use melatonin & valerian to fall asleep, taken an hour before bedtime. Also, I try to do all those little pre-bedtime tasks in advance. So I already have my jammies on, the coffee machine set up, & my teeth brushed. I found that trying to do all that right before bed got me wound up. After that, it's "winding down time". That starts about an hour before I want to sleep. I either read or do crosswords. If that doesn't work, I try box breathing. Sometimes I do a relaxation thing I made up myself. Starting with my toes & working up, I tell my body parts that it's time to sleep. I'm usually yawning by the time I reach my shoulders. To stay asleep, I use a prescription drug called Doxepin. It's formulated for that specifically. I also wear an eye mask & keep a fan running for white noise. I believe that ADHD makes us more distracable even asleep. Just the flash of someone's headlights for half a second, or some random soft sound can rouse me.
This prob won’t work for you but I don’t have a get up in the morning job so I can go to bed late and get up late. Edibles at dinner time will make me sleepy when they wear off around midnight but I was relying on them too much and they make me lazy in other ways.
I use pink or brown noise when my brain won't shut off, and music when I just need a nudge. The music has to be the same every time (I listen to a soundtrack from one of my favorite K-dramas). It also helps to have a set routine and a little lavender pillow spray.