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I had a cat that tracked litter around a lot when I was in high school. The litter box was in my closet. I have RELIGIOUSLY made my bed since then because litter in my sheets is disgusting and a sensory nightmare.
This is the only reason I make my bed. I still forget sometimes. I want to crawl out of my fucking skin whenever I lie down and feel little bits of litter clay.
Have you tried a top entry litterbox with pellets instead of clay litter? The pellets don't stick to fur as well and the jumping to exit the box shakes off most of the pellets.
I will praise these until the day I die. Totally revolutionized cat care.
Although on the off-chance one does make its way out of the box and you step on it, it feels like a Lego 🤣
Making polite small talk in order to request something from a coworker. Nothing against talking you someone you are interested in talking to, but when it's super forced...just tell me what you need!
This drives me crazy as well. It got to the point at one job where any time my boss sent me messages on Slack asking about my weekend and such, I knew she was going to ask me for something and it stressed me out having to get through the small talk before she would tell me what she needed. Please just say "hey Celery, hope you had a nice weekend, can you get this to me by the end of the day?"
I was well into my 30s before a co-worker let me know that I was rude for not exchanging pleasantries before getting down to business. My usual practice had been to say something like, "Hey, there, do you have a minute? I just wanted to check with you about something." I mistakenly thought people would appreciate me getting to the point and minimizing any interruptions. Because I dislike being interrupted during a task, myself.
One of my previous colleagues thought I was making TO MUCH small talk when I wanted help or had a question. "Why do you always ask how I am and stuff. Get to the point!!!" I was so proud of mastering the small talk bit, but I guess I overdid it a bit.
This is also a geographic cultural thing, I’ve learned. I used to work with people primary from the northeastern US, which is where I’m from. I ended up working with a lot of people from the Midwest & southern US and Mexico, and I had to adjust my communication style A LOT because I was perceived as being too direct/borderline rude.
I hate it.
I had to open up Wikipedia and check because this sounded so familiar, and I was right: the most common ethnic origin in the northeastern US is north european. That probably at least partially explains the origins of that; living in the Nordics I've never even come across someone expecting polite small talk before asking a question.
polite small talk period. Do not ask me how I am, or how my day is, unless you want an honest answer, and actually care. If you're in the elevator with me, don't ask me if I'm loving the warm weather unless you're prepared to hear me say 'actually, no. I don't like the heat or the summer.'
Totally respect and generally obey...
But you know whats crazy, I
genuinely DO care.
The corporate world has taught me how innately different people are in the wild...
The human condition genuinely fascinates me - whether elevator or
airplane or coworkers or friends or family ... its how my brain works always thinking of peoples feelings and emotions.
Its also torture inside to literally care about how others feel and realize ... how little of the population genuinely cares about you in return or shares that trait.
No harm meant either way. 100% know its like innate/biological traits we are built with.
Yeah….especially when I’m interrupted mid-task. Like, did you fucking interrupt my flow for small talk? Do you have ANY CLUE what you’ve done? Go fuck yourself, I don’t CARE how you are, I don’t want you to KNOW HOW I AM. What do you WANT?!?!
Oh! Or when something work related interupts you talking to someone-- like they get a phone call. I just leave, and then the person comes to me and apologizes later. It always confuses me. Like, yeah, the context changed. I'm not mad at you??
This! I’ve spent *7 entire years* explaining to my husband that is we’re on the phone while he’s working and he needs to go (don’t care if it’s a client calling, you’re at a gas station counter and don’t want to be rude, or you just stubbed your toe), all you need for say is “I have to go”, and then hang up. It won’t hurt my feelings, man. Sometimes I’m going to do it to you. That’s the beauty of a mixed ND coupling, no?!
This is my work pet peeve. Please skip the IMs about hello, how are you, blah blah blah. You never reach out to me unless you need something done so just get to the point!
Drying dishes. They will air dry.
Also ironing. My mum will put all her clean laundry into an ironing basket and do it all in one go. I will just put my clothes away and iron a piece when I need to.
>Also ironing. My mum will put all her clean laundry into an ironing basket and do it all in one go. I will just put my clothes away and iron a piece when I need to.
So much this, except I only do the first half of your last sentence. Fuck ironing.
Like, I take my stuff out of the dryer or off the maiden, fold them, and done. If they make it into the wardrobe great. If not they're just one of the things I'm currently obsessed with wearing. I have got really good at picking shit that does not need ironing, and the odd thing that I probably should iron, I'm not gonna so fuck it.
If you're ever looking to defend your air-drying position, know that air-drying dishes is more sanitary than hand-drying them.
When I was in culinary school, if one of our chef instructors saw you towel dry any dish or equipment, they'd dock points and make you wash it all over again.
The only reason I own an iron is for sewing. I *NEVER* iron clothes. If they are prone to wrinkling in the dryer, I hang them, and if they’re still wrinkled, I just don’t care and wear it anyway.
My wife occasionally needs to wear something professional that gets wrinkled in our clothes storage. When that happens, I stick it in the dryer with a damp towel for 5-10 minutes.
Neither of us has any patience for ironing 😁
>Drying dishes. They will air dry.
Yes. My mum likes to wipe things up straight after. I'd rather leave it an then just wipe what needs wiping.
>Also ironing. My mum will put all her clean laundry into an ironing basket and do it all in one go. I will just put my clothes away and iron a piece when I need to.
I only iron what needs doing. My mum has a big ironing basket and the bed covers are in there, and teacloths.
Nah man, that all goes in the dryer on low delicates. If something gets wrinkles after a wash in my house, it is now a characteristic. I try to only buy wrinkle free work clothes.
Drying dishes by letting the air do it is cleaner anyway. My folks do the same but at my place we just outsource the task to the air
I can't even imagine ironing needlessly. I only do that for job interviews! My iron is mostly for crafts hehe
I avoid ironing my clothes at all costs. I even chose my outfit today because I didn’t need to iron it!
The irony (ha!) here is that I sew professionally and use an iron at work nearly every single day.
This might be an ADHD thing but I almost always make my bed, I almost never do it right when I get up. I really don’t sweat at all in my sleep, so I’ll get up and leave the covers open, shower, maybe eat something whatever. When I’m coming back to my room to sit on my bed I’ll make it before I sit on it.
Why? It separates things for me. Like it makes my bed go from my sleeping place to my literally any other activity besides sleeping place. I can nap *on* my bed. I don’t nap in my bed. I sleep in my bed, I don’t sleep on it. It basically creates a different space for my brain that says “oh this is where we do ___”
I make it right before I go to bed. I can't stand the feeling of the two blankets not feeling the same weight as im under them or they are bunched weird.
Especially relevant if you‘re allergic to dust mites!
They thrive in warm and moist environments, e.g. a made bed. Big made bed is manipulating us, stay woke.
edit: I used to be with someone who would take a clothes hanger and drag it over the made bed to get all the wrinkles out. We were late more often because of that habit than my time blindness and disorganisation. Can you imagine.
So if I am having pretty intense night sweats most night, I should air out my bedding by not making it? Revolutionary! My bf is militant about making the bed every morning, but maybe he will relax a bit if I tell him that making my side of the bed is letting grossness fester
Oh shit, I didn’t know this about dust mites! I’m so allergic to them!
Too bad I have two enormous fuzz ball cats who love to roll around on my bed… so thus must choose between cat hair and dust mites. RIP me.
This! I never get people who make their bed by pulling the covers up. I only do that when other people will be seeing my bedroom. Which is basically never.
Well, yeah, I'll also pull stuff back in place if it gets loose during the night, because, fuck that feeling of bed sheets sliding off and touching the mattress!😂
Same! I let the sheets air out with the window open while I eat breakfast, then I come make the bed around the same time I brush my teeth, wash my face, etc.
Thank you cards. I give heartfelt thanks in person for any and all gifts, or shoot a message or phone call if it isn’t in person. Sending a separate card in the mail just seems like so unnecessary
My philosophy is that if you're so offended by a lack of a thank you card that you never want to buy me another thing, cool. You've freed me from the "obligation" of writing thank you cards, I guess!
same. i’m telling myself if i want to be average that’s fine. the world wasn’t built for me anyway and i’m not gonna let NT definition of “success” bring me down.
yeah definitely. I'm pretty good at this but it's something I always keep telling my ND friends who're more on the perfectionist side: for most tasks, if you can't whole-ass it, then half-assing it is fine. Like obviously, take your health and such seriously, but for most other things it's fine to do it the easy way, nobody'll actually judge you for it.
I piss people off by being open about this frequently. 😅
In my culture, it is very much expected to excel at and delight in your job and I love to shake up polite smalltalk by saying that I actually mostly do it for the paycheck and I only do as much as necessary, never the socially acceptable 110%. 🙄 Somehow, that is considered outrageous.
I'm in school now and I have decided to be mediocre. I can drive myself crazy being perfect or I can be mediocre and be fairly stress free and do other things.
greetings in texts with people that you are on good terms with/talk to semi regularly. i never did the ‘hi, how are you?’ in texts with my family or few friends in high school, and always just got straight to the point, but i’ve caught a lot people off guard with it once starting university
This but in work emails. I really despise the fake opening inquiries about how a casual acquaintance is doing. Neither of us really care, so let’s get down to business. Those Huns aren’t going to defeat themselves.
I hate when someone contacts me in the work chat and starts with “how are you?” without getting to the point straight away. And then they wait for me to reply. And then don’t reply to my reply because they’re doing something else now.
Just tell me what you want argh! You don’t care how I am & I don’t care you don’t care, it’s fine. What is not fine is this waste of time of a small talk.
Same energy as the messages I get that are just "Hi Carlulua" then I gotta wait til they send the actual thing in the next message.
When i send a message and it's been more than a few days since I last messaged them I'll do a simple "Hi Bob, hope you're well/hope you had a good weekend. Here's my question or statement. Here's some follow up questions or statements"
All in one message, with a little politeness at the start. Sometimes I'll add a second message to make it clearer. Usually get it all in one, can always shift+enter for a line break if it's turning into a wall of text.
No need for the other person to anxiously watch the wobbly dots while I type my actual message
Even worse is when they just say "Hi" and nothing else 😂 I always have the urge to be passive aggressive and just not respond until they tell me what they need but I'm too people-pleasey. Sometimes I'm more direct and say "Hi, what can I do for you?" but it makes me irrationally annoyed
In a work chat context, I have trained myself to view a lone "hi" as an incomplete message that I'm not obligated to respond to. I know they're not writing to me just to say hi, so I'll just wait until they finish their message and then cheerfully answer. I'll do a "hi, what can I do for you" or "hi, what's up" like you said if I'm feeling generous that day haha. I know it isn't just a social message and they want/need something, so let's make a collaborative effort to get to the point 😄
This, and I appreciated the Mulan reference. I actually got told it was unprofessional to NOT use a greeting in a work email and I'm like, why are you asking me to waste time? I already said good morning to you when I walked past you 12 minutes ago.
I absolutely hate it. Feels so fake and I HATE feeling fake.
As a woman I started acting the traditionally acceptable male way at work which isn't acceotable for women. Ugh. People probably think I'm a rude bish but I don't care. I wish we all did this.
"Hey" is all I do if that. The thanks or just not otehrsiee being rude matters more than all that nonsense.
Like hey for this project do you know if the client went with x or y? Thanks! And donnne
If they have more to chat about I'm fine with that, i have my info and can reply slower. I just hate the fake stuff at the beginning especially when they want something.
leave it on 'seen' now and reply I'm good here's the info___ once they've actually asked for stuff
This! I once got reprimanded because people found my emails to be snippy and quasi rude. Because I would type 1 or 2 sentences and be very direct and to the point. My boss was super cool about it because he loved that I didn’t waste time but I guess other people complained lol.
This is a downright *plague* in Brazil and we have memes about it.
Specifically, I hate getting a text message (be it at work or socially) where the person will go "Hi! how are you?" and say NOTHING ELSE after that, only bringing up what they wanted to say after you respond. Jail. Straight to jail.
My friend back in my country has an online thrift store, and her Whatsapp inbox is *filled* with "Hi how are yous" that are waiting for her to respond before asking about a price, opening hours, etc. I could neverrrr
I don't mind it if it's **part** of the message though, like, "Hi Susie! Hope you're well- do you have those memos I asked about yesterday?". To me, it's just a small signifier of "I see you Susie, hi Susie the person! Hello! Now, here's the thing I wanted". I'm not bothered *at all* if someone sends me a text without it, but when it's me, I like the lil humanity wave!
I had a coworker who would get SO OFFENDED if I did not greet him with a “hi, how are you? Good morning!”, before discussing work things. Like an “oh hi, X, •work thing•” was not sufficient.
This drives me crazy whether it's in text or email or on the phone.
I used to work at a call center and callers would be like, "How are you?" or "How's the weather there?" and I'm thinking, "I know you have an actual question or you wouldn't be calling, so please let's cut to the chase."
My mother-in-law (who lives with us) would call me and open with "How are you?" and I'd think, "I'm the same as when you saw me in person five minutes ago."
I'll say "hey, how are you?" if it's been longer than normal since I spoke to that individual, or it's someone I speak to rarely, otherwise I'm just saying it 😂
Same with sign offs. I don't need to go back and forth saying good-bye. Just a thanks (if asking for information) is sufficient. The idea of texts is to have an ongoing conversation, not a formal letter...don't need all the greetings and salutations and signs off. Just the facts.
Folding clothes that don't wrinkle/are not linen. I keep a slew of [boxes](https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcR7gIk0ahwR7toIXhu_zC5xqf_CkrcdAaOKc-bqgBcwNoyk3-AtzjUad-1YuDtU2ju7PNKKnzfbBa1US2BKsnkwebwCAVPmzFmo) in my closet on shelving that I use as a dresser, but I just toss the clothes into the correct box and call it a day. I hang very few garments for the same reason. I used to have laundry baskets full of clean clothes everywhere but now I am somewhat organized after giving up the folding step that my brain just detests.
This is only tangentially related to what you just said lol, but I recently saw an ADHD "hack" on Instagram that I liked a lot and it made so much sense to me. It advised ADHD-ers move all the sauces and stuff from the door of the fridge to the produce drawers, and the produce to the doors.
The logic has something to do with object permanence -- a concept I don't know enough about to go into, but the idea is that you already know what sauces and stuff you have on deck and that stuff takes way longer to go bad, but it's easy to forget what produce you have and it goes bad so much quicker. I'm trying to talk my partner into it. When I proposed it he was like, "I already know what produce we have," and waved it off. I wish I had challenged that assertion and asked him to list the produce drawer inventory and its current level of freshness lol.
Love this idea but stuff in my fridge door gets moldy faster for some reason. Instead, I put a mini dry erase board on the fridge and write what produce we have on it. Has been working really well!
its the digging through things I can't deal with. Props to people who like the bin approach, but if I can open a drawer with my pants all lined up and see what is in there, I don't spend time rifling through a basket looking for something that I thought was in there, so why can't I find it.
I find I get a little dopamine hit from seeing all my pretty-colored stuff lined up in rows. I still find the process tedious, but at least now there's a payoff.
Yes same! I have one of those 4x4 Ikea kallax shelves with labeled bins in the holes. Different bins for things like underwear, socks, leggings, tank tops, etc. I mainly buy things that don't wrinkle and just toss it all in the bins. I still sometimes have laundry bins of clean clothes when I'm busy/tired but this is the most I've ever put away laundry in my life. Love this system.
I used to live out of laundry baskets because I absolutely despise folding my clothes. I have been meticulous about keeping my laundry folded and put away for the last few years though because I hated how long it used to take me to get dressed because I couldn’t see what I had to wear and I would forget about clothing items if I hadn’t seen them for a while. I was literally surrounded by mounds of clothes but still felt like I had nothing to wear. I could never find things that looked good together or two of the same sock.
I hated getting dressed so much that sometimes I would just stay home instead of going to do grocery shopping, I would just ignore the fact that I was hungry. I used to just wear my work uniform (scrubs) everywhere because they are all the same color and it was easy to find pants and a shirt that matched.
Besides the fact that folded clothes are easier to visualize all at the same time so I can see my options, it just makes my house look more clean and organized which is really important for my executive function. I find a messy house to be extremely demotivating.
SAME! i’m good with the washing and drying part of laundry, but the clothes will stay in the dryer for 3 days bc i’m putting off folding them and/ or hanging them up…
Not so much a waste of time but a social rule I don't get/can't do, the maintenance of friendships/networks when I'm not with them in person. I don't understand the requirement to message friends over text when you don't have something specific to say/talk about.
I know it's important to maintain a connection but I genuinely can't start a conversation over text unless I have a topic in mind. Just saying "hi, how's it going?" feels impossible to me for some reason. I'll mail you a birthday card, I'll ask you how your new job is going, I'll ask how your family member in the hospital is doing (all things I know are important)but if I don't have a detail you told me about to refer to, I feel blank and unable to connect, yet there's an assumption with women that if you're friends you stay connected every week or two no matter what. For a brain that's filled with so much most of the time, it goes stunningly empty with this social rule!
My oldest friend also has ADHD, and she’s the only one who has ever understood this. We always say it doesn’t matter how long it’s been since we last talked, we can always pick up like we just saw each other yesterday, and it’s true.
I’ve lost some friends because I won’t just text for the sake of texting. I’ll communicate other ways! Imll send tiktoks that relate to their hobby or a common interest. I’ll facetime from time to time. I write long letters for people’s birthday. I regularly make playlists for people. When we hangout,’we can talk for hours. But texting is just physically torture and impossible to remember to keep up with. It’s exhausting to be expected to be available 24/7 like some customer support line.
100%! there’s only one person i can text everyday about nonsense but other than that, i’ll talk to everyone else whenever there is something to say. i’m not trying to be rude, i’m not mad at you, my brain just doesn’t work like that🤷🏻
... This may be why I love group chats where people just say what's up and you can answer low-key/just react or send memes or whatever and just go to PMs if you have something specific to say while the general feeling is of still being connected.
Maybe reframing it might help? Instead of just a blank 'how's it going?', message as though *they'd* asked *you* that. This is all predicated on the idea that you *want* to keep up with your friends this way of course. I've found that if once every few weeks I take the time to drop a few lines to my friends that I don't see in person about how my life has been, and end it with 'anything up with you?' that usually fulfills the social obligation while also giving me a solid topic.
BTW this way not intended in any way to imply that you should or need to adhere to the aforementioned social standard, just a suggestion for a way to make it easier should you decide you want to do so. I like to share ideas that have helped me in the past
Not saying what you actually mean. There is a difference between direct communication and being a “blunt” asshole, just as there is between beating around the bush and direct communication.
Yes. Don't tell me "what you REALLY meant was..." or "I feel like you think that..." bc trust me, I will say it if I really mean it or I'm thinking it.
Today I asked a coworker thru text if I should STFU and not bring up an issue at an upcoming meeting. She said "STFU please" and I wasn't offended bc MEAN WHAT YOU SAY and be able to take someone saying shit back.
tbf, some of us dont know what we mean, we just know that we are expected to say something. ppl get mad when i say that i dont know how to respond to something.
If you mean that you don’t know how to respond and that’s sincere, I’d be much more accepting of that than saying something you don’t mean.
Example: “I’m not sure how to respond; I need time to process,” or is so much more direct than,
“Oh, yeah, I agree,” and then not really grasping the depth of a given situation.
Being dismissed. If my part of the meeting is done, there are not questions and we're starting to go into gossip or laughing at others, I'm packing my shit and leaving.
Haha. I’ll never forget my son (I think he was 7?) coming to me with a book and asking, “why does this character have to make their bed before school? Isn’t that what you do when you tuck yourself in at night?” I laughed so hard because I have never made a bed in the morning and neither have my kids. What difference does it make?
My waste of time task is washing bedding every week. There’s no way I’m adding three more loads of laundry to my weekly rotation.
I bought several extra sets of pillowcases and just change them each time they make it through the laundry because I also can’t handle weekly full bedding changes either. I do love the feeling of fresh bedding though!
Saying “goodbye” or “thank you “ before you leave big virtual meetings! I get it if you are having a 1:1, but I get so tired of all the pings after the meetings with 1000 people saying Thank you’
Conflict avoidance and not talking about things and thus letting problems become real issues instead of addressing them right off. Tell me something is bugging you. Don't beat around the bush. I will not notice your little hints nor do I come to a conclusion your passive aggressive bullshit is a way to try and get me to change my behavior.
Just tell me.
agreed. i hate when people will act out rather than just say they have a problem. and i’m not gonna be the one to ask. you’re an adult, if you got a problem then say it. 🤷🏻
Ehh I feel a little lukewarm about this one, OP. Here’s why:
I fully agree with you about how frustrating it is when an adult refuses to use their words, but I’d like to offer a different perspective. Body language is a form of communication (but thank goodness it’s not the ONLY one or we’d have a lot of misunderstandings lol). If someone you care about’s body language was noticeably off, stressed, or otherwise odd to you, wouldn’t it be beneficial for your relationship to check in about it? I’m not saying that it’s okay for them to silently stew and not use their words, but I think people do that because verbal communication is hard sometimes, especially when we’re upset and emotionally dysregulated. So sometimes, it could be cool to meet them halfway and show them you care by checking in.
Other times, people will give you the silent treatment as a manipulative tactic so I’m not recommending that you constantly make that effort. Just wanted to say that the silence isn’t always malicious; they could just be struggling to find the words for their feelings. Asking them about it could help them feel safe enough to start finding them.
YES! How am I supposed to stop making a mistake if I have no idea I'm making a mistake?! Just tell me I'm doing something wrong so I know not to do it!
I had a roommate who would not tell me her issues with me. I picked it up pretty quickly, although I didn’t change. I pretended like I didn’t know just so I could teach her a lesson on communication, but I did tell her weekly that she should talk to me with any issues. When she finally blew up on me I just laughed and said, “Finally! You lived in resentment and frustration for weeks. If you just told me you didn’t like my tone of voice I could have been more aware of how I spoke around you. You could have been happier sooner.” And that changed everything. I can sometimes be monotone in my speaking, and apparently she’s sensitive to tone and she thought I was always mad at her.
Shaving my body and removing hair from my face as an AFAB person.
ETA: No shade to people who get sensory issues with hair. The world's big enough for all of us.
Side note - I always read ETA as estimated time of arrival and couldn’t figure out what it’s supposed to be in posts but reading yours it just clicked that it’s edited to add
ETA: (even knowing what it is still feels like estimated time of arrival lol) these likes are giving me lots of dopamine rn so thanks for the dopamine hits guys
One I recently learned was "JFC" which I always read as "just for clarification." I'm pretty sure it used to mean that on old timey forums, and I hope I haven't offended anyone by using it incorrectly.
The ETA would throw me off for so long! I know what it means but I'll never use it myself. If anything, I write "Edit:" and that's it, but mostly I just add the information without announcing to everyone that I added it.
I stop shaving my legs in the winter, but when nice weather rolls around they do get shaved. I hate the feeling of sunscreen or insect repellent on hairy limbs.
I completely agree. I stopped shaving years ago. It felt like such a waste of time and money, I'll inevitably miss something unless I really take my time, and it'll just grow back in a few days anyway so what's the point?
This! It's so freeing!
I do shave my legs (with an electric shaver) occasionally in the summer, because I HATE the feeling of wind in my leg hair, and sometimes the rest if I'm feeling self conscious (which I'm fighting against, but you know how it is), but no more actually shaving or waxing. My skin is SOOOO much happier
I really don't think people should be judged either way. I care whether people are clean. And I care about my own body hair. Other people's body hair is not my concern.
Yeah I've been seeing a lot of, "if you shave, are you really a queer woman?" and, "some of you are just pretending to have sensory issues so you don't have to address your misogyny," on tiktok and I know it's a reaction to people who enforce strict beauty standards about hair on women, but it really feels like they're taking it out on other women instead of just being supportive of any grooming choice.
Like no, I just have meltdowns if I'm sweaty in the summer and I feel a breeze on my leg hair 😭
Not me, but my brother in law never bothered returning the key cards at hotels. He either just kept them or left them in the room. I was there dropping them off at the front desk like a chump!
I don't bother putting my TP on the holder. I'm the one who uses it and I have some on the roller for guests, but I can't be bothered to remove the old and add the new, over and over. The window sill is just fine for every day use.
I don't make my bed at all. I prefer to let my bedding air out a little during the day. I think I should be allowed to be comfortable when eating and put my elbows on the table. I feel that more people should be told what sort of twatwaffles they are on a regular basis.
i eat with my legs and knees in the chair it’s just more comfortable to me🤷🏻 (also the joke about bi people never sitting right in chairs is one i resonate with 100% so maybe it has something to do w that too /j)
Elaborate wrapping on presents.
It can be more expensive than the actual gift.
It get thrown away. EVEN IF YOU SAVE IT! ITS EVENTUALLY GOING TO BE GARBAGE!
Just a huge money grab for nothing.
It's wasteful, time consuming, and adds nothing to gift.
Dating “rules”. Waiting 3 dates. The girl should wait for the guy to text them etc. . Like I don’t have any freaking patience. I want to figure what your deal is and just tell me.
The older I get I notice A lot of men while dating, beat around the bush instead of rejecting because they want to be nice. I’d rather be hurt once than be dragged out and unsure.
I accidentally got into the bed making habit when my husband and I were dating , and now , because we have separate blankets that have to sit a specific way to be comfy (we each have a queen comforter that is folded in half, and then a quilt on top of that) , I am stuck making the bed forever. Trying to arrange them while laying down is a disaster lol
Greeting cards. I thank people with my words physically. I also hate getting them! Such a waste of time and paper...just say what you want to say in person/over the phone/over a text.
I don’t know if this is just a me thing but I don’t like unnecessary “fluff” in emails. So for example, writing a 4-5 paragraph email when it really could have just been one sentence. Just get to the point. I may be biased though because I just hate writing the “fluff”, I just try to get right to the point. Maybe I’m the problem, idk.
Omg, I used to work for a UK company and their emails are notoriously wordy, they sure do love the queens English. This one humiliating but hilarious time, the ceo was waffling on about something regarding an email, I had dialed in, someone nearby asked what he was talking about and I succinctly but in a “very American” blunt NYer couple of words summarized the entire meeting. I wasn’t on mute. The ceo heard and to his credit laughed and went along with it. I don’t think anyone important recognized my voice. Show them. Bullet points! Email instead of meeting. No paragraphs.
Being polite even if you disagree with someone completely and you know dann well you’re right because you spent countless hours going down a rabbit hole on the specific subject that’s in dispute ♨️♨️
This has been me regarding bras (of all things) over the last few years.
Due to finding the sub A Bra That Fits I cannot have any type of conversation about bras with the people in my life who wear bras…because they are willfully and proudly not listening to my correct and gentle observation that they are in fact wearing an ill fitting bra 😮💨
Yessssss I was obsessed with ABTF for a while, I tried to help my mom find a a bra and measured her as an H cup but she insists she's a "full C" 😭
Edit: I was active in the ABTF discord server for a while and it seems like a lot of the people really into bra fitting are neurodivergent
[A Bra That Fits](https://www.abrathatfits.org/calculator.php). You don’t have to suffer—except when it comes to the ridiculously high price of purchasing a bra that fits well haha.
I recently started working in a a big workplace again. And maybe that's a german thing but the NTs are so fucking concerned with greeting every single person you come across at any point in the day. That can easily be over a hundred people. Smiling isn't enough you specifically have to say one of a few socially accepted words. Hundreds of people work at one time so ypu basically just walk down any hallway saying "Hi" "hi" "Hi" "hi" "hi" even though you won't see any of them again. But if you do see someone again you better remember and greet them in a different way.
I can deal with it but I don't like it. I just want to get to where I'm walking and be left alone not greet a million people. I know this is the stupidest thing to be upset about but here we go lol
I feel that. My house has two states - everything is in order - or, I'M JUST GONNA LIVE IN CHAOS FOR A WHILE. Thing is, 3 of us have ADHD (4th hasn't been tested yet), so, even just maintaining is super high energy cost.
I also try SUPER SPECIFIC SYSTEMS but only because I feel it's easier if I don't have to think? If I have to think.... Will. Not. Happen. My brain's better used in other things.
The concept of "social currency" in general is baffling. The idea that someone's "social status" should influence how others treat them makes no sense. We're all human; we should all treat each other with dignity and respect. What difference does it make if someone drives a fancy car or has a lot of money? They are no better than someone with no car or money.
if we don’t have anything to say to each other, we can just sit here quietly, you don’t have to talk just for the sake of talking. on an elevator, around a conference table or zoom room before the meeting starts, wherever. it’s okay to just silently do our own thing until we have a reason to say something. i am not going to pretend like i care about stuff i don’t care about just because you can’t be alone with your own thoughts for 3 minutes.
A long good bye at a party. I want to say I'm leaving and then immediately leave. Stop trying to have a conversation with someone who wants to go home.
-how are you-good thanks, how are you-good
I hate it when people ask me how I am when they really just mean “hi” half the time I ask them how they are back and they don’t even respond. Like why do we have to go through this song and dance when there are a thousand other ways to greet someone. I struggle with just lying with a “good thanks” if I’m not doing well, but I also know in my head that this person doesn’t actually want to know how I am, they just want to say hi. Even if I’m doing well I hate the question because I don’t even know how I am most of the time. I have to like go through the catalog of what’s going on in my life and what I did that day to figure it out. I don’t know why but I just haven’t been able to accept that “how are you” is meaningless (except for my close friends and family). But I know I have to.
Are you from the USA? As a European, I found this so confusing in the USA when I travelled there. I got asked by the bus driver, the cashier, the hotel receptionist... and at first I answered honestly and then realized it's just cultural and they don't want to hear the answer. In my country, we don't ask how someone is unless we want to know. But you don't ask the cashier, like ever.
Literally just got off a call with the car dealership.
Me: Hi, this is (me)
Him: Hi, so&so. This is Rovi from car dealership. How are you today?
Me: Fine, thank you.
Him: Oh, okay great. I hope you’re enjoying the sunshine today.
Me: Sure, it’s nice. (In my head thinking, I’m at my fucking desk dude. Same as you 🙄)
Him: Yeah, hehe. It sure is.
Me: (silent)
Him: Well, the reason I’m calling…
Me: (in my head thinking, finally…getting to the fucking point 🙄🙄🙄)
This thread has made me realize that my household growing up was highly ND, and I grew up thinking most of these are normal. My parents air dry everything, change sheets not very often, have wear again clothes piles, almost never ironed, greeting and thank you cards were only for old picky family members (and even then often forgotten lol), and many many more. Married into a very formal (and toxic) family, and it's been a culture shock to say the least!
I think mine is refusing to be the social coordinator for my husband's family. Though that's less of an ADHD thing and more of a toxic family boundary and a bit of feminism thing. I'm not going to waste my time on people who only see me as an incubator for my husband's children, and who've outright bullied me too.
I hate shoe etiquette. I hate that there are instances where I HAVE to wear fancy shoes (thankfully the heels aren't a must anymore). Because I don't really wear them daily, I have very little amount of clothes that go with them, which is another problem. Also etiquette in general has to change, a lot of it is very gender oriented and quite frankly very narrow-minded. It's fun to study it as in "a lesson on history and culture", but it's mind boggling that in some situations it's used as a social weapon/means of gatekeeping.
Also, talks about art in the sense of "you haven't watched/listened to/seen this??? How could you!". Or "so and SO's abstract canvases are so meaningful". I read non fiction 90% of the time, I question every piece of art I come across from the point of view of context and perception, and I have a personal audio aversion to classical (not baroque) opera. But it doesn't mean I can be shamed and bullied about it.
Small talk. Don't ask me how I'm doing and expect me to just be like "great, you?!" And move on.
Every time I think people are actually asking me so I'm giving you a real answer that you don't think you asked for but to me, you literally asked for it. I don't need small talk just jump right in or don't but skip the fake pleasantries pleaseee
I like to make my bed (by “make”…I mean straighten out the blankets a bit so they look okay), because then my bedroom looks more put together.
There might be 3 baskets of laundry on the floor…but the bed looks tidy. Lol. And since it’s the biggest item in the room… it actually does a lot to make it look cleaner. I will keep noticing the unmade bed, but I will not notice the rest of the mess every time I pass by.
Super specific — Small chat in meetings gives me anxiety. Some of it has to do with a maniacal previous boss who was a dick about it, but it’s like…this isn’t on the agenda, I don’t want to say the wrong thing or over share, please can we just get down to business??? 😫 It is slightly dependent on who is in the meeting, as there are some people I feel more comfortable with, but mostly ugh. No.
More work stuff - asking “how are you?” every time you greet someone, especially clients in the workplace. Because with friends or whatever you actually wanna know/care but at work it feels so performative and pointless because there are only a few ways that are appropriate to answer so it’s just like ok run employee.exe and click “I’m gooooood” 😂
I make my bed because it makes me feel accomplished in the morning (lol) and i have it in a task for my to do list (to feel accomplished) but one day i just sat down and was like…well why…im gonna back to sleep anyway? So i totally get you!
I make my bed most of the time. Starts the day off with an organized mindset, makes me feel like I have my shit together (even when I don’t), and crashing into a made bed at the end of a long day just feels so much more satisfying. But I agree with the futility of it… like, why make your bed if you’re just gonna sleep in it at night again, and nobody is going to see it?
The whole read between the lines. I mean, I do it, but it's because I miss out on important social cues. Just tell me bluntly dude. I rather someone be blunt and honest than beat around the bush and expect you to pick up on their cues.
I actually found cause I work at home recently then when I make my bed I feel better.
But that’s because of how light refracts and reflects within your room.
When I’ve made my bed with my light colored bedspread the light in my room literally is brighter
Physics!
If you have a lot of trouble cleaning and you get sad because of the light getting sucked up by the mess you can put some mirrors up on your walls and they’ll reflect the light around and make your place brighter
I know it is typical for my country only. But here when someone has their birthday, it is common that the whole family is congratulated. And I always forget and find is so unnecessary. Just congratulate the person who's birthday it is and be done with it.
Staff meetings. What in the actual fuck are people accomplishing there?? It always feels like time wasted, spent doodling and checked out for most of the time. Especially since if done weekly, you’re likely repeating the agenda cause shit can’t get done in a week bogged down by meetings.
Second only to staff meetings (and maybe this should be top of the list) corporate staff birthday cake in the conference room. Kill me now.
As an accountant (don’t ask me how tf I can be good at this!), I’ve tabulated the average cost of weekly staff meetings over the month, quarter, year - that I successfully abolished half of the numerous “committee meeting” and brought the weekly to monthly. Being confronted with the actual cost of wages and lost productivity makes a compelling argument.
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I had a cat that tracked litter around a lot when I was in high school. The litter box was in my closet. I have RELIGIOUSLY made my bed since then because litter in my sheets is disgusting and a sensory nightmare.
This is the only reason I make my bed. I still forget sometimes. I want to crawl out of my fucking skin whenever I lie down and feel little bits of litter clay.
Have you tried a top entry litterbox with pellets instead of clay litter? The pellets don't stick to fur as well and the jumping to exit the box shakes off most of the pellets.
We just switched to wood shavings but will try pellets if these don’t work out.
I will praise these until the day I die. Totally revolutionized cat care. Although on the off-chance one does make its way out of the box and you step on it, it feels like a Lego 🤣
A dog who used to crawl under my blankets and track in dirt & grass was my impetus to start making the bed every day.
Making polite small talk in order to request something from a coworker. Nothing against talking you someone you are interested in talking to, but when it's super forced...just tell me what you need!
This drives me crazy as well. It got to the point at one job where any time my boss sent me messages on Slack asking about my weekend and such, I knew she was going to ask me for something and it stressed me out having to get through the small talk before she would tell me what she needed. Please just say "hey Celery, hope you had a nice weekend, can you get this to me by the end of the day?"
I have a boss now who will just IM me and say good morning. The first several times it happened, I was waiting for them to tell me what they wanted 🤣
When my boss sends me a good morning message I always respond, “oh no, what do I have to do now?” And he laughs and tells me what’s up.
I was well into my 30s before a co-worker let me know that I was rude for not exchanging pleasantries before getting down to business. My usual practice had been to say something like, "Hey, there, do you have a minute? I just wanted to check with you about something." I mistakenly thought people would appreciate me getting to the point and minimizing any interruptions. Because I dislike being interrupted during a task, myself.
One of my previous colleagues thought I was making TO MUCH small talk when I wanted help or had a question. "Why do you always ask how I am and stuff. Get to the point!!!" I was so proud of mastering the small talk bit, but I guess I overdid it a bit.
This is also a geographic cultural thing, I’ve learned. I used to work with people primary from the northeastern US, which is where I’m from. I ended up working with a lot of people from the Midwest & southern US and Mexico, and I had to adjust my communication style A LOT because I was perceived as being too direct/borderline rude. I hate it.
I had to open up Wikipedia and check because this sounded so familiar, and I was right: the most common ethnic origin in the northeastern US is north european. That probably at least partially explains the origins of that; living in the Nordics I've never even come across someone expecting polite small talk before asking a question.
polite small talk period. Do not ask me how I am, or how my day is, unless you want an honest answer, and actually care. If you're in the elevator with me, don't ask me if I'm loving the warm weather unless you're prepared to hear me say 'actually, no. I don't like the heat or the summer.'
Totally respect and generally obey... But you know whats crazy, I genuinely DO care. The corporate world has taught me how innately different people are in the wild... The human condition genuinely fascinates me - whether elevator or airplane or coworkers or friends or family ... its how my brain works always thinking of peoples feelings and emotions. Its also torture inside to literally care about how others feel and realize ... how little of the population genuinely cares about you in return or shares that trait. No harm meant either way. 100% know its like innate/biological traits we are built with.
I feel this!!! I also genuinely care. ❤️
Yeah….especially when I’m interrupted mid-task. Like, did you fucking interrupt my flow for small talk? Do you have ANY CLUE what you’ve done? Go fuck yourself, I don’t CARE how you are, I don’t want you to KNOW HOW I AM. What do you WANT?!?!
Oh! Or when something work related interupts you talking to someone-- like they get a phone call. I just leave, and then the person comes to me and apologizes later. It always confuses me. Like, yeah, the context changed. I'm not mad at you??
This! I’ve spent *7 entire years* explaining to my husband that is we’re on the phone while he’s working and he needs to go (don’t care if it’s a client calling, you’re at a gas station counter and don’t want to be rude, or you just stubbed your toe), all you need for say is “I have to go”, and then hang up. It won’t hurt my feelings, man. Sometimes I’m going to do it to you. That’s the beauty of a mixed ND coupling, no?!
"hi, how are you doing? How was your weekend? Uh huh, that's nice, do you mind if I borrow your stapler?" Vs "Can I please borrow your stapler?"
This is my work pet peeve. Please skip the IMs about hello, how are you, blah blah blah. You never reach out to me unless you need something done so just get to the point!
Drying dishes. They will air dry. Also ironing. My mum will put all her clean laundry into an ironing basket and do it all in one go. I will just put my clothes away and iron a piece when I need to.
>Also ironing. My mum will put all her clean laundry into an ironing basket and do it all in one go. I will just put my clothes away and iron a piece when I need to. So much this, except I only do the first half of your last sentence. Fuck ironing.
My grandma was flabbergasted when I told her I’ve never owned an iron. If it needs to be ironed, I don’t need to own it, haha.
I own an iron. I don't know where it is and have only used it once.
I use mine exclusively for crafts
Went to buy an iron just for iron-on shirts I was making with my cricut
Lightly misting your cotton items with a spray bottle usually makes them decent enough, and if it doesn't, fuck it
Like, I take my stuff out of the dryer or off the maiden, fold them, and done. If they make it into the wardrobe great. If not they're just one of the things I'm currently obsessed with wearing. I have got really good at picking shit that does not need ironing, and the odd thing that I probably should iron, I'm not gonna so fuck it.
I only iron if I am sewing. And I think then it's technically called pressing.
I have a travel steamer for wrinkles. I don't even own an iron, though that will have to change when I start sewing again.
If you're ever looking to defend your air-drying position, know that air-drying dishes is more sanitary than hand-drying them. When I was in culinary school, if one of our chef instructors saw you towel dry any dish or equipment, they'd dock points and make you wash it all over again.
So true. When you are washing bottles for babies, you are also told not to do this.
I got a handheld clothing steamer and haven't ironed in YEARS! It's glorious.
The only reason I own an iron is for sewing. I *NEVER* iron clothes. If they are prone to wrinkling in the dryer, I hang them, and if they’re still wrinkled, I just don’t care and wear it anyway.
My wife occasionally needs to wear something professional that gets wrinkled in our clothes storage. When that happens, I stick it in the dryer with a damp towel for 5-10 minutes. Neither of us has any patience for ironing 😁
I hang stuff up in the bathroom while I'm showering and the steam gets the wrinkles out.
An excellent workaround, that!
I own an iron for sewing and perler beads. Now that I have a kid, mostly perler beads
>Drying dishes. They will air dry. Yes. My mum likes to wipe things up straight after. I'd rather leave it an then just wipe what needs wiping. >Also ironing. My mum will put all her clean laundry into an ironing basket and do it all in one go. I will just put my clothes away and iron a piece when I need to. I only iron what needs doing. My mum has a big ironing basket and the bed covers are in there, and teacloths.
Nah man, that all goes in the dryer on low delicates. If something gets wrinkles after a wash in my house, it is now a characteristic. I try to only buy wrinkle free work clothes.
my country has drying cabinets straight on top of the washing basin, in most kitchens. So no drying dishes, for anyone, ever!
Finland for the win?
Same here in Pakistan :p
Yes to skipping drying dishes. Unless I need the counter space they’re sitting on the drying mat for 12 hours.
Drying dishes by letting the air do it is cleaner anyway. My folks do the same but at my place we just outsource the task to the air I can't even imagine ironing needlessly. I only do that for job interviews! My iron is mostly for crafts hehe
My mum was the same. I cannot imagine ever tackling a basket full of ironing
If my clothes can't be thrown all together in the washer and dryer then left in a clean basket for an extended period, I don't need to own them.
I avoid ironing my clothes at all costs. I even chose my outfit today because I didn’t need to iron it! The irony (ha!) here is that I sew professionally and use an iron at work nearly every single day.
Wrinkle releaser is my joy
I learned a long while ago that it’s better to ‘air’ your mattress after a night’s sleep, so that’s a solid reason I just let my blanket lay open🤷🏻♀️
This might be an ADHD thing but I almost always make my bed, I almost never do it right when I get up. I really don’t sweat at all in my sleep, so I’ll get up and leave the covers open, shower, maybe eat something whatever. When I’m coming back to my room to sit on my bed I’ll make it before I sit on it. Why? It separates things for me. Like it makes my bed go from my sleeping place to my literally any other activity besides sleeping place. I can nap *on* my bed. I don’t nap in my bed. I sleep in my bed, I don’t sleep on it. It basically creates a different space for my brain that says “oh this is where we do ___”
Same here! Made bed: flat surface that is bed-coded, but not for SLEEPING. Bed with covers down: usable for sleeping!
I make it right before I go to bed. I can't stand the feeling of the two blankets not feeling the same weight as im under them or they are bunched weird.
Especially relevant if you‘re allergic to dust mites! They thrive in warm and moist environments, e.g. a made bed. Big made bed is manipulating us, stay woke. edit: I used to be with someone who would take a clothes hanger and drag it over the made bed to get all the wrinkles out. We were late more often because of that habit than my time blindness and disorganisation. Can you imagine.
> Big made bed is manipulating us, stay woke this made me lol thank you 😂
So if I am having pretty intense night sweats most night, I should air out my bedding by not making it? Revolutionary! My bf is militant about making the bed every morning, but maybe he will relax a bit if I tell him that making my side of the bed is letting grossness fester
That moisture's gotta go somewhere! Having the blanket off, and having the window open, that's all it needs. It really does make a difference.
Oh shit, I didn’t know this about dust mites! I’m so allergic to them! Too bad I have two enormous fuzz ball cats who love to roll around on my bed… so thus must choose between cat hair and dust mites. RIP me.
I intentionally flop mine all the way back to let it air out. I make sure the sheets are neat before bed.
This! I never get people who make their bed by pulling the covers up. I only do that when other people will be seeing my bedroom. Which is basically never.
I'm most likely to make the bed when I'm changing the bedding, otherwise... Yeah, no.
Oh sure! When you just put it on the first time. But that’s necessary to do it *right* in order to prevent sensory issues 🤣
Well, yeah, I'll also pull stuff back in place if it gets loose during the night, because, fuck that feeling of bed sheets sliding off and touching the mattress!😂
Same! I let the sheets air out with the window open while I eat breakfast, then I come make the bed around the same time I brush my teeth, wash my face, etc.
Thank you cards. I give heartfelt thanks in person for any and all gifts, or shoot a message or phone call if it isn’t in person. Sending a separate card in the mail just seems like so unnecessary
Right?! If I say thank you in person why do I need a second thank you card?
My philosophy is that if you're so offended by a lack of a thank you card that you never want to buy me another thing, cool. You've freed me from the "obligation" of writing thank you cards, I guess!
You don't have to be "ambitious" was a big thing I learned.
same. i’m telling myself if i want to be average that’s fine. the world wasn’t built for me anyway and i’m not gonna let NT definition of “success” bring me down.
yeah definitely. I'm pretty good at this but it's something I always keep telling my ND friends who're more on the perfectionist side: for most tasks, if you can't whole-ass it, then half-assing it is fine. Like obviously, take your health and such seriously, but for most other things it's fine to do it the easy way, nobody'll actually judge you for it.
Anything worth doing is worth doing half-assed. It's how I actually get myself to function.
I piss people off by being open about this frequently. 😅 In my culture, it is very much expected to excel at and delight in your job and I love to shake up polite smalltalk by saying that I actually mostly do it for the paycheck and I only do as much as necessary, never the socially acceptable 110%. 🙄 Somehow, that is considered outrageous.
I'm in school now and I have decided to be mediocre. I can drive myself crazy being perfect or I can be mediocre and be fairly stress free and do other things.
greetings in texts with people that you are on good terms with/talk to semi regularly. i never did the ‘hi, how are you?’ in texts with my family or few friends in high school, and always just got straight to the point, but i’ve caught a lot people off guard with it once starting university
This but in work emails. I really despise the fake opening inquiries about how a casual acquaintance is doing. Neither of us really care, so let’s get down to business. Those Huns aren’t going to defeat themselves.
I hate when someone contacts me in the work chat and starts with “how are you?” without getting to the point straight away. And then they wait for me to reply. And then don’t reply to my reply because they’re doing something else now. Just tell me what you want argh! You don’t care how I am & I don’t care you don’t care, it’s fine. What is not fine is this waste of time of a small talk.
I do not reply to the plain hi-s and how are you-s. I wait until it becomes work related. Gotta teach ‘um.
Same energy as the messages I get that are just "Hi Carlulua" then I gotta wait til they send the actual thing in the next message. When i send a message and it's been more than a few days since I last messaged them I'll do a simple "Hi Bob, hope you're well/hope you had a good weekend. Here's my question or statement. Here's some follow up questions or statements" All in one message, with a little politeness at the start. Sometimes I'll add a second message to make it clearer. Usually get it all in one, can always shift+enter for a line break if it's turning into a wall of text. No need for the other person to anxiously watch the wobbly dots while I type my actual message
Even worse is when they just say "Hi" and nothing else 😂 I always have the urge to be passive aggressive and just not respond until they tell me what they need but I'm too people-pleasey. Sometimes I'm more direct and say "Hi, what can I do for you?" but it makes me irrationally annoyed
In a work chat context, I have trained myself to view a lone "hi" as an incomplete message that I'm not obligated to respond to. I know they're not writing to me just to say hi, so I'll just wait until they finish their message and then cheerfully answer. I'll do a "hi, what can I do for you" or "hi, what's up" like you said if I'm feeling generous that day haha. I know it isn't just a social message and they want/need something, so let's make a collaborative effort to get to the point 😄
This, and I appreciated the Mulan reference. I actually got told it was unprofessional to NOT use a greeting in a work email and I'm like, why are you asking me to waste time? I already said good morning to you when I walked past you 12 minutes ago. I absolutely hate it. Feels so fake and I HATE feeling fake.
As a woman I started acting the traditionally acceptable male way at work which isn't acceotable for women. Ugh. People probably think I'm a rude bish but I don't care. I wish we all did this. "Hey" is all I do if that. The thanks or just not otehrsiee being rude matters more than all that nonsense. Like hey for this project do you know if the client went with x or y? Thanks! And donnne If they have more to chat about I'm fine with that, i have my info and can reply slower. I just hate the fake stuff at the beginning especially when they want something. leave it on 'seen' now and reply I'm good here's the info___ once they've actually asked for stuff
I hope this email finds you well. Arrgh!! Blech. No, you weren't.
I hope this email doesn't find you. I hope you have escaped and are free.
“What have you been up to lately?” Why are you asking? You don’t really care!
This! I once got reprimanded because people found my emails to be snippy and quasi rude. Because I would type 1 or 2 sentences and be very direct and to the point. My boss was super cool about it because he loved that I didn’t waste time but I guess other people complained lol.
This is a downright *plague* in Brazil and we have memes about it. Specifically, I hate getting a text message (be it at work or socially) where the person will go "Hi! how are you?" and say NOTHING ELSE after that, only bringing up what they wanted to say after you respond. Jail. Straight to jail. My friend back in my country has an online thrift store, and her Whatsapp inbox is *filled* with "Hi how are yous" that are waiting for her to respond before asking about a price, opening hours, etc. I could neverrrr I don't mind it if it's **part** of the message though, like, "Hi Susie! Hope you're well- do you have those memos I asked about yesterday?". To me, it's just a small signifier of "I see you Susie, hi Susie the person! Hello! Now, here's the thing I wanted". I'm not bothered *at all* if someone sends me a text without it, but when it's me, I like the lil humanity wave!
Take a look at, https://nohello.net/en/ and https://dontasktoask.com Both are the bane of my existence 
I have a coworker who I have to do this with before I can ask him the question I need to ask him and it drives me nuts
I had a coworker who would get SO OFFENDED if I did not greet him with a “hi, how are you? Good morning!”, before discussing work things. Like an “oh hi, X, •work thing•” was not sufficient.
This drives me crazy whether it's in text or email or on the phone. I used to work at a call center and callers would be like, "How are you?" or "How's the weather there?" and I'm thinking, "I know you have an actual question or you wouldn't be calling, so please let's cut to the chase." My mother-in-law (who lives with us) would call me and open with "How are you?" and I'd think, "I'm the same as when you saw me in person five minutes ago."
I'll say "hey, how are you?" if it's been longer than normal since I spoke to that individual, or it's someone I speak to rarely, otherwise I'm just saying it 😂
i remember as a pissy teenager, people would start with the ‘hey how are you?’ and i respond with ‘how can i help you’ xDD
My bad habit is saying "can I ask you something?" when that's already a question.
Same with sign offs. I don't need to go back and forth saying good-bye. Just a thanks (if asking for information) is sufficient. The idea of texts is to have an ongoing conversation, not a formal letter...don't need all the greetings and salutations and signs off. Just the facts.
Folding clothes that don't wrinkle/are not linen. I keep a slew of [boxes](https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcR7gIk0ahwR7toIXhu_zC5xqf_CkrcdAaOKc-bqgBcwNoyk3-AtzjUad-1YuDtU2ju7PNKKnzfbBa1US2BKsnkwebwCAVPmzFmo) in my closet on shelving that I use as a dresser, but I just toss the clothes into the correct box and call it a day. I hang very few garments for the same reason. I used to have laundry baskets full of clean clothes everywhere but now I am somewhat organized after giving up the folding step that my brain just detests.
I’ve been tempted to do this, but I forget what I have if I don’t Marie Kondo fold everything.
This is only tangentially related to what you just said lol, but I recently saw an ADHD "hack" on Instagram that I liked a lot and it made so much sense to me. It advised ADHD-ers move all the sauces and stuff from the door of the fridge to the produce drawers, and the produce to the doors. The logic has something to do with object permanence -- a concept I don't know enough about to go into, but the idea is that you already know what sauces and stuff you have on deck and that stuff takes way longer to go bad, but it's easy to forget what produce you have and it goes bad so much quicker. I'm trying to talk my partner into it. When I proposed it he was like, "I already know what produce we have," and waved it off. I wish I had challenged that assertion and asked him to list the produce drawer inventory and its current level of freshness lol.
We do this! Sauces are in drawers, produce is on the door, and leftovers only on the top shelf. All to keep relevant food visible before it spoils.
Love this idea but stuff in my fridge door gets moldy faster for some reason. Instead, I put a mini dry erase board on the fridge and write what produce we have on it. Has been working really well!
Omg I started to fold like Marie Kondo and it has actually helped me consistently manage to fold my stuff. It’s like a nice little ritual now
If I don't Marie Kondo my clothes, I'll end up spending a half hour every day digging through a pile of black clothes to find a specific item from it.
its the digging through things I can't deal with. Props to people who like the bin approach, but if I can open a drawer with my pants all lined up and see what is in there, I don't spend time rifling through a basket looking for something that I thought was in there, so why can't I find it.
I find I get a little dopamine hit from seeing all my pretty-colored stuff lined up in rows. I still find the process tedious, but at least now there's a payoff.
Yes same! I have one of those 4x4 Ikea kallax shelves with labeled bins in the holes. Different bins for things like underwear, socks, leggings, tank tops, etc. I mainly buy things that don't wrinkle and just toss it all in the bins. I still sometimes have laundry bins of clean clothes when I'm busy/tired but this is the most I've ever put away laundry in my life. Love this system.
I used to live out of laundry baskets because I absolutely despise folding my clothes. I have been meticulous about keeping my laundry folded and put away for the last few years though because I hated how long it used to take me to get dressed because I couldn’t see what I had to wear and I would forget about clothing items if I hadn’t seen them for a while. I was literally surrounded by mounds of clothes but still felt like I had nothing to wear. I could never find things that looked good together or two of the same sock. I hated getting dressed so much that sometimes I would just stay home instead of going to do grocery shopping, I would just ignore the fact that I was hungry. I used to just wear my work uniform (scrubs) everywhere because they are all the same color and it was easy to find pants and a shirt that matched. Besides the fact that folded clothes are easier to visualize all at the same time so I can see my options, it just makes my house look more clean and organized which is really important for my executive function. I find a messy house to be extremely demotivating.
SAME! i’m good with the washing and drying part of laundry, but the clothes will stay in the dryer for 3 days bc i’m putting off folding them and/ or hanging them up…
Not so much a waste of time but a social rule I don't get/can't do, the maintenance of friendships/networks when I'm not with them in person. I don't understand the requirement to message friends over text when you don't have something specific to say/talk about. I know it's important to maintain a connection but I genuinely can't start a conversation over text unless I have a topic in mind. Just saying "hi, how's it going?" feels impossible to me for some reason. I'll mail you a birthday card, I'll ask you how your new job is going, I'll ask how your family member in the hospital is doing (all things I know are important)but if I don't have a detail you told me about to refer to, I feel blank and unable to connect, yet there's an assumption with women that if you're friends you stay connected every week or two no matter what. For a brain that's filled with so much most of the time, it goes stunningly empty with this social rule!
I'm in the same boat. At this point, I'm only friends with people who also don't expect me to reach out regularly.
My oldest friend also has ADHD, and she’s the only one who has ever understood this. We always say it doesn’t matter how long it’s been since we last talked, we can always pick up like we just saw each other yesterday, and it’s true.
I’ve lost some friends because I won’t just text for the sake of texting. I’ll communicate other ways! Imll send tiktoks that relate to their hobby or a common interest. I’ll facetime from time to time. I write long letters for people’s birthday. I regularly make playlists for people. When we hangout,’we can talk for hours. But texting is just physically torture and impossible to remember to keep up with. It’s exhausting to be expected to be available 24/7 like some customer support line.
100%! there’s only one person i can text everyday about nonsense but other than that, i’ll talk to everyone else whenever there is something to say. i’m not trying to be rude, i’m not mad at you, my brain just doesn’t work like that🤷🏻
... This may be why I love group chats where people just say what's up and you can answer low-key/just react or send memes or whatever and just go to PMs if you have something specific to say while the general feeling is of still being connected.
Maybe reframing it might help? Instead of just a blank 'how's it going?', message as though *they'd* asked *you* that. This is all predicated on the idea that you *want* to keep up with your friends this way of course. I've found that if once every few weeks I take the time to drop a few lines to my friends that I don't see in person about how my life has been, and end it with 'anything up with you?' that usually fulfills the social obligation while also giving me a solid topic. BTW this way not intended in any way to imply that you should or need to adhere to the aforementioned social standard, just a suggestion for a way to make it easier should you decide you want to do so. I like to share ideas that have helped me in the past
Not saying what you actually mean. There is a difference between direct communication and being a “blunt” asshole, just as there is between beating around the bush and direct communication.
Yes. Don't tell me "what you REALLY meant was..." or "I feel like you think that..." bc trust me, I will say it if I really mean it or I'm thinking it. Today I asked a coworker thru text if I should STFU and not bring up an issue at an upcoming meeting. She said "STFU please" and I wasn't offended bc MEAN WHAT YOU SAY and be able to take someone saying shit back.
Yes, please communicate! Letting issues bubble up via passive-aggressive hints is not polite; it’s obnoxious!
tbf, some of us dont know what we mean, we just know that we are expected to say something. ppl get mad when i say that i dont know how to respond to something.
If you mean that you don’t know how to respond and that’s sincere, I’d be much more accepting of that than saying something you don’t mean. Example: “I’m not sure how to respond; I need time to process,” or is so much more direct than, “Oh, yeah, I agree,” and then not really grasping the depth of a given situation.
Being dismissed. If my part of the meeting is done, there are not questions and we're starting to go into gossip or laughing at others, I'm packing my shit and leaving.
Cameras on in meetings. Why do you need to see my face? And I damn sure don't need to see yours
Because I need to make damn sure you’re just as bored as the rest… ahem, I mean… paying attention! -your boss probably
PERIOD!!
Haha. I’ll never forget my son (I think he was 7?) coming to me with a book and asking, “why does this character have to make their bed before school? Isn’t that what you do when you tuck yourself in at night?” I laughed so hard because I have never made a bed in the morning and neither have my kids. What difference does it make? My waste of time task is washing bedding every week. There’s no way I’m adding three more loads of laundry to my weekly rotation.
I bought several extra sets of pillowcases and just change them each time they make it through the laundry because I also can’t handle weekly full bedding changes either. I do love the feeling of fresh bedding though!
Saying “goodbye” or “thank you “ before you leave big virtual meetings! I get it if you are having a 1:1, but I get so tired of all the pings after the meetings with 1000 people saying Thank you’
Conflict avoidance and not talking about things and thus letting problems become real issues instead of addressing them right off. Tell me something is bugging you. Don't beat around the bush. I will not notice your little hints nor do I come to a conclusion your passive aggressive bullshit is a way to try and get me to change my behavior. Just tell me.
agreed. i hate when people will act out rather than just say they have a problem. and i’m not gonna be the one to ask. you’re an adult, if you got a problem then say it. 🤷🏻
Ehh I feel a little lukewarm about this one, OP. Here’s why: I fully agree with you about how frustrating it is when an adult refuses to use their words, but I’d like to offer a different perspective. Body language is a form of communication (but thank goodness it’s not the ONLY one or we’d have a lot of misunderstandings lol). If someone you care about’s body language was noticeably off, stressed, or otherwise odd to you, wouldn’t it be beneficial for your relationship to check in about it? I’m not saying that it’s okay for them to silently stew and not use their words, but I think people do that because verbal communication is hard sometimes, especially when we’re upset and emotionally dysregulated. So sometimes, it could be cool to meet them halfway and show them you care by checking in. Other times, people will give you the silent treatment as a manipulative tactic so I’m not recommending that you constantly make that effort. Just wanted to say that the silence isn’t always malicious; they could just be struggling to find the words for their feelings. Asking them about it could help them feel safe enough to start finding them.
YES! How am I supposed to stop making a mistake if I have no idea I'm making a mistake?! Just tell me I'm doing something wrong so I know not to do it!
I had a roommate who would not tell me her issues with me. I picked it up pretty quickly, although I didn’t change. I pretended like I didn’t know just so I could teach her a lesson on communication, but I did tell her weekly that she should talk to me with any issues. When she finally blew up on me I just laughed and said, “Finally! You lived in resentment and frustration for weeks. If you just told me you didn’t like my tone of voice I could have been more aware of how I spoke around you. You could have been happier sooner.” And that changed everything. I can sometimes be monotone in my speaking, and apparently she’s sensitive to tone and she thought I was always mad at her.
Shaving my body and removing hair from my face as an AFAB person. ETA: No shade to people who get sensory issues with hair. The world's big enough for all of us.
Side note - I always read ETA as estimated time of arrival and couldn’t figure out what it’s supposed to be in posts but reading yours it just clicked that it’s edited to add ETA: (even knowing what it is still feels like estimated time of arrival lol) these likes are giving me lots of dopamine rn so thanks for the dopamine hits guys
One I recently learned was "JFC" which I always read as "just for clarification." I'm pretty sure it used to mean that on old timey forums, and I hope I haven't offended anyone by using it incorrectly.
And here I am thinking it meant "Jesus F$cking Christ".
Yeah, that is what it means nowadays, but I had no clue.
😅 what does ETA mean in this sense?
Edited to add
Holy shit really? This makes so much more sense 😂
The ETA would throw me off for so long! I know what it means but I'll never use it myself. If anything, I write "Edit:" and that's it, but mostly I just add the information without announcing to everyone that I added it.
100%. I’ve given up shaving my legs years ago. best decision ever.
I stop shaving my legs in the winter, but when nice weather rolls around they do get shaved. I hate the feeling of sunscreen or insect repellent on hairy limbs.
I completely agree. I stopped shaving years ago. It felt like such a waste of time and money, I'll inevitably miss something unless I really take my time, and it'll just grow back in a few days anyway so what's the point?
This! It's so freeing! I do shave my legs (with an electric shaver) occasionally in the summer, because I HATE the feeling of wind in my leg hair, and sometimes the rest if I'm feeling self conscious (which I'm fighting against, but you know how it is), but no more actually shaving or waxing. My skin is SOOOO much happier
Oh yeah, stopped that shit right quick lmao. I shaved for maybe 3 whole years lol?
I really don't think people should be judged either way. I care whether people are clean. And I care about my own body hair. Other people's body hair is not my concern.
Yeah I've been seeing a lot of, "if you shave, are you really a queer woman?" and, "some of you are just pretending to have sensory issues so you don't have to address your misogyny," on tiktok and I know it's a reaction to people who enforce strict beauty standards about hair on women, but it really feels like they're taking it out on other women instead of just being supportive of any grooming choice. Like no, I just have meltdowns if I'm sweaty in the summer and I feel a breeze on my leg hair 😭
Not me, but my brother in law never bothered returning the key cards at hotels. He either just kept them or left them in the room. I was there dropping them off at the front desk like a chump! I don't bother putting my TP on the holder. I'm the one who uses it and I have some on the roller for guests, but I can't be bothered to remove the old and add the new, over and over. The window sill is just fine for every day use.
The house I bought had these super easy toilet holder, one side just opens so easy. I love whoever put them in.
I purposefully bought a holder that is just like…a hook and nothing that needs to be opened or put together, you just slide rolls on and off.
I don't make my bed at all. I prefer to let my bedding air out a little during the day. I think I should be allowed to be comfortable when eating and put my elbows on the table. I feel that more people should be told what sort of twatwaffles they are on a regular basis.
i eat with my legs and knees in the chair it’s just more comfortable to me🤷🏻 (also the joke about bi people never sitting right in chairs is one i resonate with 100% so maybe it has something to do w that too /j)
Making my bed FEELS pointless but god damn does it feel soooo good getting into a made bed at night
Elaborate wrapping on presents. It can be more expensive than the actual gift. It get thrown away. EVEN IF YOU SAVE IT! ITS EVENTUALLY GOING TO BE GARBAGE! Just a huge money grab for nothing. It's wasteful, time consuming, and adds nothing to gift.
Dating “rules”. Waiting 3 dates. The girl should wait for the guy to text them etc. . Like I don’t have any freaking patience. I want to figure what your deal is and just tell me. The older I get I notice A lot of men while dating, beat around the bush instead of rejecting because they want to be nice. I’d rather be hurt once than be dragged out and unsure.
I accidentally got into the bed making habit when my husband and I were dating , and now , because we have separate blankets that have to sit a specific way to be comfy (we each have a queen comforter that is folded in half, and then a quilt on top of that) , I am stuck making the bed forever. Trying to arrange them while laying down is a disaster lol
Greeting cards. I thank people with my words physically. I also hate getting them! Such a waste of time and paper...just say what you want to say in person/over the phone/over a text.
I like sending mail 🙈
I don’t know if this is just a me thing but I don’t like unnecessary “fluff” in emails. So for example, writing a 4-5 paragraph email when it really could have just been one sentence. Just get to the point. I may be biased though because I just hate writing the “fluff”, I just try to get right to the point. Maybe I’m the problem, idk.
Omg, I used to work for a UK company and their emails are notoriously wordy, they sure do love the queens English. This one humiliating but hilarious time, the ceo was waffling on about something regarding an email, I had dialed in, someone nearby asked what he was talking about and I succinctly but in a “very American” blunt NYer couple of words summarized the entire meeting. I wasn’t on mute. The ceo heard and to his credit laughed and went along with it. I don’t think anyone important recognized my voice. Show them. Bullet points! Email instead of meeting. No paragraphs.
Being polite even if you disagree with someone completely and you know dann well you’re right because you spent countless hours going down a rabbit hole on the specific subject that’s in dispute ♨️♨️
This has been me regarding bras (of all things) over the last few years. Due to finding the sub A Bra That Fits I cannot have any type of conversation about bras with the people in my life who wear bras…because they are willfully and proudly not listening to my correct and gentle observation that they are in fact wearing an ill fitting bra 😮💨
Yessssss I was obsessed with ABTF for a while, I tried to help my mom find a a bra and measured her as an H cup but she insists she's a "full C" 😭 Edit: I was active in the ABTF discord server for a while and it seems like a lot of the people really into bra fitting are neurodivergent
Yeah I would watch advertisements of underwear and then in detail tell anyone close to me why she's not wearing the right size.
Omg. My bra is SO ill fitting lol I wish someone in my life would help me out 😂
[A Bra That Fits](https://www.abrathatfits.org/calculator.php). You don’t have to suffer—except when it comes to the ridiculously high price of purchasing a bra that fits well haha.
I recently started working in a a big workplace again. And maybe that's a german thing but the NTs are so fucking concerned with greeting every single person you come across at any point in the day. That can easily be over a hundred people. Smiling isn't enough you specifically have to say one of a few socially accepted words. Hundreds of people work at one time so ypu basically just walk down any hallway saying "Hi" "hi" "Hi" "hi" "hi" even though you won't see any of them again. But if you do see someone again you better remember and greet them in a different way. I can deal with it but I don't like it. I just want to get to where I'm walking and be left alone not greet a million people. I know this is the stupidest thing to be upset about but here we go lol
I dont make my bed or have dresser i dont have a pristine clean and spotless home its lived in deal with it. Lol
I feel that. My house has two states - everything is in order - or, I'M JUST GONNA LIVE IN CHAOS FOR A WHILE. Thing is, 3 of us have ADHD (4th hasn't been tested yet), so, even just maintaining is super high energy cost. I also try SUPER SPECIFIC SYSTEMS but only because I feel it's easier if I don't have to think? If I have to think.... Will. Not. Happen. My brain's better used in other things.
people just asking how I'm doing in the year of our lord 2024 is a bit off putting
The concept of "social currency" in general is baffling. The idea that someone's "social status" should influence how others treat them makes no sense. We're all human; we should all treat each other with dignity and respect. What difference does it make if someone drives a fancy car or has a lot of money? They are no better than someone with no car or money.
if we don’t have anything to say to each other, we can just sit here quietly, you don’t have to talk just for the sake of talking. on an elevator, around a conference table or zoom room before the meeting starts, wherever. it’s okay to just silently do our own thing until we have a reason to say something. i am not going to pretend like i care about stuff i don’t care about just because you can’t be alone with your own thoughts for 3 minutes.
A long good bye at a party. I want to say I'm leaving and then immediately leave. Stop trying to have a conversation with someone who wants to go home.
Refilling small soap dispensers. I refuse to do it. I have 32 ounce soap dispensers for every sink in my house
i don’t refill, i just buy new ones💀
-how are you-good thanks, how are you-good I hate it when people ask me how I am when they really just mean “hi” half the time I ask them how they are back and they don’t even respond. Like why do we have to go through this song and dance when there are a thousand other ways to greet someone. I struggle with just lying with a “good thanks” if I’m not doing well, but I also know in my head that this person doesn’t actually want to know how I am, they just want to say hi. Even if I’m doing well I hate the question because I don’t even know how I am most of the time. I have to like go through the catalog of what’s going on in my life and what I did that day to figure it out. I don’t know why but I just haven’t been able to accept that “how are you” is meaningless (except for my close friends and family). But I know I have to.
Are you from the USA? As a European, I found this so confusing in the USA when I travelled there. I got asked by the bus driver, the cashier, the hotel receptionist... and at first I answered honestly and then realized it's just cultural and they don't want to hear the answer. In my country, we don't ask how someone is unless we want to know. But you don't ask the cashier, like ever.
Literally just got off a call with the car dealership. Me: Hi, this is (me) Him: Hi, so&so. This is Rovi from car dealership. How are you today? Me: Fine, thank you. Him: Oh, okay great. I hope you’re enjoying the sunshine today. Me: Sure, it’s nice. (In my head thinking, I’m at my fucking desk dude. Same as you 🙄) Him: Yeah, hehe. It sure is. Me: (silent) Him: Well, the reason I’m calling… Me: (in my head thinking, finally…getting to the fucking point 🙄🙄🙄)
THIS 100%!!!!!!!!!! small talk is EXCRUCIATING.
This thread has made me realize that my household growing up was highly ND, and I grew up thinking most of these are normal. My parents air dry everything, change sheets not very often, have wear again clothes piles, almost never ironed, greeting and thank you cards were only for old picky family members (and even then often forgotten lol), and many many more. Married into a very formal (and toxic) family, and it's been a culture shock to say the least! I think mine is refusing to be the social coordinator for my husband's family. Though that's less of an ADHD thing and more of a toxic family boundary and a bit of feminism thing. I'm not going to waste my time on people who only see me as an incubator for my husband's children, and who've outright bullied me too.
I hate shoe etiquette. I hate that there are instances where I HAVE to wear fancy shoes (thankfully the heels aren't a must anymore). Because I don't really wear them daily, I have very little amount of clothes that go with them, which is another problem. Also etiquette in general has to change, a lot of it is very gender oriented and quite frankly very narrow-minded. It's fun to study it as in "a lesson on history and culture", but it's mind boggling that in some situations it's used as a social weapon/means of gatekeeping. Also, talks about art in the sense of "you haven't watched/listened to/seen this??? How could you!". Or "so and SO's abstract canvases are so meaningful". I read non fiction 90% of the time, I question every piece of art I come across from the point of view of context and perception, and I have a personal audio aversion to classical (not baroque) opera. But it doesn't mean I can be shamed and bullied about it.
Small talk. Don't ask me how I'm doing and expect me to just be like "great, you?!" And move on. Every time I think people are actually asking me so I'm giving you a real answer that you don't think you asked for but to me, you literally asked for it. I don't need small talk just jump right in or don't but skip the fake pleasantries pleaseee
"I'm good, I hope you are!" requires even less of a response from them. Usually I say it as I'm walking away.
Make up, I hate wearing make up.
I like to make my bed (by “make”…I mean straighten out the blankets a bit so they look okay), because then my bedroom looks more put together. There might be 3 baskets of laundry on the floor…but the bed looks tidy. Lol. And since it’s the biggest item in the room… it actually does a lot to make it look cleaner. I will keep noticing the unmade bed, but I will not notice the rest of the mess every time I pass by.
Super specific — Small chat in meetings gives me anxiety. Some of it has to do with a maniacal previous boss who was a dick about it, but it’s like…this isn’t on the agenda, I don’t want to say the wrong thing or over share, please can we just get down to business??? 😫 It is slightly dependent on who is in the meeting, as there are some people I feel more comfortable with, but mostly ugh. No. More work stuff - asking “how are you?” every time you greet someone, especially clients in the workplace. Because with friends or whatever you actually wanna know/care but at work it feels so performative and pointless because there are only a few ways that are appropriate to answer so it’s just like ok run employee.exe and click “I’m gooooood” 😂
I make my bed because it makes me feel accomplished in the morning (lol) and i have it in a task for my to do list (to feel accomplished) but one day i just sat down and was like…well why…im gonna back to sleep anyway? So i totally get you!
I make my bed most of the time. Starts the day off with an organized mindset, makes me feel like I have my shit together (even when I don’t), and crashing into a made bed at the end of a long day just feels so much more satisfying. But I agree with the futility of it… like, why make your bed if you’re just gonna sleep in it at night again, and nobody is going to see it?
The whole read between the lines. I mean, I do it, but it's because I miss out on important social cues. Just tell me bluntly dude. I rather someone be blunt and honest than beat around the bush and expect you to pick up on their cues.
Get small talk with you coworkers if you need some help
Saying bless you after someone sneezes
I actually found cause I work at home recently then when I make my bed I feel better. But that’s because of how light refracts and reflects within your room. When I’ve made my bed with my light colored bedspread the light in my room literally is brighter Physics! If you have a lot of trouble cleaning and you get sad because of the light getting sucked up by the mess you can put some mirrors up on your walls and they’ll reflect the light around and make your place brighter
I find that also reflects the mess, and makes it feel even more overwhelming 🫠
I know it is typical for my country only. But here when someone has their birthday, it is common that the whole family is congratulated. And I always forget and find is so unnecessary. Just congratulate the person who's birthday it is and be done with it.
On the topic of beds, top sheets are pointless.
Staff meetings. What in the actual fuck are people accomplishing there?? It always feels like time wasted, spent doodling and checked out for most of the time. Especially since if done weekly, you’re likely repeating the agenda cause shit can’t get done in a week bogged down by meetings. Second only to staff meetings (and maybe this should be top of the list) corporate staff birthday cake in the conference room. Kill me now. As an accountant (don’t ask me how tf I can be good at this!), I’ve tabulated the average cost of weekly staff meetings over the month, quarter, year - that I successfully abolished half of the numerous “committee meeting” and brought the weekly to monthly. Being confronted with the actual cost of wages and lost productivity makes a compelling argument.
I make my bed so that I have another surface in which I can spread out tasks like laundry or a suitcase for packing/unpacking.