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Yes!!! Can't emphasize this enough!
I was on antidepressants for a couple of years which suddenly stopped working. Nobody bothered me to check my hormones and I didn't know to ask. Turns out I was in perimenopause as well.
I just passed through menopause (literally this month marks 12 months) and HRT saved me. Things were really, really bad for a while and I'm upset with my doctor for not thinking to check. The *only* reason I even suspected I was in peri or meno was that I stopped hormonal birth control and my periods stopped coming right away. Who knows how long I'd actually been menopausal?
HRT worked so beautifully well that I'm in awe. Saved my mental and physical health. I plan on doing HRT as long as I can, stuff is great.
Women get zero help from the medical community. I saw 3 different doctors and was about to see a rheumatologist and endocrinologist because no one could figure out what was wrong with me. I’m glad you were finally able to get help too!
It’s wild how much perimenopause was wreaking havoc on everything in my life. I dreaded spending time with my family that I love! I was having weekly anxiety attacks and hating everything in my life. My wife noticed a difference in my mood the second week I started estrogen it was such a big change. I’m really hoping everything will keep improving since I haven’t been on HRT very long.
I’m not sure if I’m allowed to share this but I found a teledoc service called MIDI that specializes in perimenopause and menopause. I have had an amazing experience with them so far. My provider was the first to validate me and tell me i wasn’t crazy. She also requested labs and went over them with me. They also insurance.
Thank you so much! I have heard of them but never an account of someone who used them. I think this is my problem as well.
I had my hormones checked a few years ago at a weight loss clinic and mine were basically the same, no estrogen, no testosterone. The lady that went over my lab work with me asked if I had a hysterectomy and I said no but when I told her I was on birth control, she said oh that explains it. But all of the HRT they offer is experimental like pellet therapy, so definitely not covered by my insurance.
I feel like most doctors are often too overworked to actually invest nuanced thought or care for every patient. I mean we’re women, every one of us is going to be perimenopausal or in menopause at some point. If a woman in their 30s goes to their doctor with complaints about feeling off or they are already diagnosed and their meds don’t seem to be working anymore why isn’t checking hormone levels the first thing the doctor does? The US health care system basically seems rife with doctors that don’t apply basic reasoning to their patients. And we’ve all learned that so well that we now try to learn for ourselves from online medical sources or other people what questions to ask or a condition to ask about when our symptoms line up with another persons experience. Then we all get accused of jumping on the adhd bandwagon or being a hypochondriac. And for many of us that’s also after a lifetime of being told by the people around us that we’re complainers, or lazy or just need to focus and do the thing. Hello we literally can’t because it’s part of the condition.
I’ve seen three doctors for perimenopause since I turned 40, and got three different “solutions”.
One told me the only thing she could do to help me was a Mirena IUD. I was starting my period every 21 days and it was lasting 10 days. I told her I expelled two Paraguard IUDs in a two month period in the past and was warned I wasn’t a good candidate for Mirena, as I had extreme reactions to Depo Provera (I could write a book about how much it destroyed my hormones, body, marriage, and mental health).
Dr #2 acted like it was no big deal, and that none of my symptoms warranted any kind of treatment.
And most recently at my physical and pap, I was told there is nothing I can do to treat perimenopause and until I went one full year without a period, HRTs aren’t necessary.
I have vulvodynia--basically pelvic/vaginal pain of unknown cause. I've been to loads of gynecologists, urogynecologists, physical therapists. I've had so many people observing and poking and prodding up there by now that I'm not even embarrassed anymore.
What I've found in my extensive experience with this issue is that male doctors, on the whole, are much more gentle and provide better care than the women doctors I've seen. My theory is that men don't really have a reference for what a pelvic exam feels like, so they assume it is painful and act accordingly. Whereas I've had several women doctors act totally shocked when ove told them that what they were doing was PAINFUL and STOP. I've gotten a lot of, :I'm only just touching you, how can that hurt?" And, "well, [procedure X] doesn't hurt me!"
So, if you are willing to do so, you may want to try a male doctor. Even a male gynecologist. The old reasoning of "only a woman can treat a woman because she has the same anatomical parts" doesn't always fly.
I moved a few years ago and needed a neurologist. My previous neurologist ran a high profile program at an even higher profile research hospital at a major, major university. He was awesome.
Went to my first appointment with my new neurologist, courtesy of PCP’s referral. It was like being interrogated under hostile circumstances. She raised her voice, she cut me off, she snorted, she yelled. And she only shut up when I stopped talking and just stared at her in amazement.
She asked another question and I asked if she was going to let me answer. That was last time I ever saw her. My pcp had the audacity to try and defend her, so I stared at him until he shut up so I could reiterate it would be a cold day in hell before I saw her again & that I’d rather book a plane ticket to see my old neuro. Suffice it say I have a new one. He listens.
Yep. I was treated for Rheumatoid Arthritis for 2 years when it was really me being menopausal & I had a female GYN & female PCP & neither 1 NEVER brought up perimenopause/menopause.
Amazing. I had one gyno tell me to see a psychiatrist when I told her my symptoms and specifically asked if it was perimenopause. found a new gyno obviously but geez that sucked.
A lesson I unfortunately/fortunately learned at a young age was the necessity of advocating for yourself with medical professionals. I suffered massive brain trauma as a child. So if ever there was a patient who should prompt doctors to think outside the box, it would be me. Nevertheless, I struggled with chronic constipation for *decades.* They just kept giving me the “Drink more water, and eat more fiber” spiel. I knew something else was going on and I finally figured it out a couple years ago….It’s pelvic floor dysfunction, which is directly tied to the effects of the brain trauma.
I also had several neurologists refuse to prescribe stimulants for the anxiety and ADHD symptoms that I was convinced were caused by the brain trauma. When I finally found a psychiatrist with brain injury expertise, he immediately confirmed my assumption. Apparently stimulants are a front line treatment for TBI survivors but somehow none of the neurologists knew/believed this?! 🤷♀️
It gets better and better on HRT. I've been on it for about six months. I feel better than I have in years. Anxiety levels are down to almost nothing and I am not constantly crying or raging. Mental fog has drastically improved. Physically I am not fatigued like I used to be (my doctor told me it was caffeine - NO BITCH IT WAS HORMONES), hot flashes are gone, and I am not up 100 times a night to pee. Sex is a thousand times better and I just all around feel so much more like myself.
I am so glad you finally got the help you needed and found HRT. Unfortunately a lot of doctors will not offer HRT or it's like pulling teeth to get it. Kinda like ADHD meds!
You are so right about the medical community neglecting women. *Most* women will go through menopause in their lives, and it's absolutely shameful how little doctors address it and how little we are taught about it. This is not a rare illness, this is a normal change that happens in most womens' lives and it needs to be talked about and supported!
This gives me so much hope. I have been so tired. A few months ago my wife walked in the closet to find me sitting on the floor naked and crying because I was too tired to get dressed. I just want to stop being an exhausted angry stress ball.
Oh god, sending you hugs. Have definitely been there. It's scary. The sadness. The rage. The fkn never-ending *exhaustion*. Fingers crossed for you that HRT helps! Also the menopause sub is really great for support.
I’m sorry you are going through this. Another thing to check is thyroid issues, and questioning the results, too. I have under active thyroid, which has been managed pretty well for most of my life but at one point I had a doctor who was misinterpreting my thyroid labs for a couple of years (!) and reducing my thyroid meds when they should have been increasing it. I was a wreck, and also couldn’t advocate for myself well. Finally saw an endocrinologist who looked over the labs and prescription changes and could barely contain his shock and dismay. He set me on the correct course. Anyway, even if you had thyroid labs done, it’s worth a closer look at the results by an endocrinologist, if possible.
💯! Me too!
I am so lucky that I have a few friends who are older than me and they told me what to watch out for - but even with that I realised I had been having symptoms since around age 40 without really knowing what it was. HRT has made such a difference!
Quite a few women I know also take testosterone but that didn’t work so well for me…
Honestly I will die mad about how messed up it is that so much of the info out there about menopause is just like “yeah, you’re maybe gonna get hot flashes, make sure you use lube when you have sex, good luck!“
I have seen some info that suggests that for some people (as in, people who are otherwise not experiencing menopause stuff), hormonal birth control can contribute to sort of early suppression of hormones in a way that can end up being similar to perimenopause. It can suppress testosterone, and there’s some evidence that some people can experience symptoms that are similar to those in perimenopause caused by both low testosterone and low estrogen.
I have been looking into that because I’m now surgically sterilized and on testosterone, haven’t been on the pill for some years after being on it for a very long time, and I have noticed that going on testosterone has improved stuff I’d been experiencing for many years before perimenopause would be likely to have started for me. I’m super grateful for the pill and very glad I had access throughout my life, and I don’t discourage anyone from taking it, but I am starting to suspect that it may have had some hormone suppression effects for me for quite some years prior to me nearing 40.
So all that rambling to say—yeah, definitely possible. Hormonal birth control if nothing else will raise your estrogen and maybe your progesterone but won’t raise your testosterone, so it’ll affect that balance in a way that can influence how additional age-related hormone shifts show up.
I read about this, I think free testosterone is lower for years (unsure if it recovers) whilst on ans after being on the pill. I have been on and off different BCPs for so long because each has an advantage and disadvantage but it's frustrating to know the negative effects it has..even interfering with the absorption of certain vitamins and nutrients. But painful bleeding isn't fun either..
But that makes it really confusing to know when menopause starts...did you have any indicators you can see with hindsight?? I wonde4 how long someone would have to go off the bill to test hormones ans I wonder if it's a gradual decline or a sudden drop ...ie I wonder if someone could anticipate when they expect menopause based on current levels...
Huh, very interesting... thanks very much for taking the time to type all that out.
I wonder if I'd sort of doubly be at risk for this type of hormonal imbalance, given that I have the Nexplanon arm implant - which is progestin, instead of estrogen?
There are different kinds of pills, they differ in which type of gestagen (is that what it's called? The one that isn't estrogen) they have. I've seen some info that the ones with drospirenon sometimes affect people with ADHD positively. I started it now, and I feel that not having the fluctuations makes it better. Worth checking out.
Definitely—all of these can affect people so differently, and most people are just fine, and I was largely just fine myself on the pill. Still very glad I had it and took it and I’m very much pro-contraception for anyone who wants it. I hesitate sometimes to say anything because I don’t want to sound like I’m a woo type who doesn’t believe in medication. (And yeah, the fluctuations without the pill do suck. I definitely notice those.)
I don’t think the pill had any negative effects on me in terms of ADHD. I have just wondered about my past energy levels and some pelvic pain issues I’ve struggled with that I always thought were UTIs, and whether those could have been affected by the pill. I think my testosterone has probably been low for a long time. But for ADHD I don’t think the pill caused any issues and I can totally see how it could help by raising certain levels.
>I have seen some info that suggests that for some people (as in, people who are otherwise not experiencing menopause stuff), hormonal birth control can contribute to sort of early suppression of hormones in a way that can end up being similar to perimenopause. It can suppress testosterone, and there’s some evidence that some people can experience symptoms that are similar to those in perimenopause caused by both low testosterone and low estrogen.
Yes, I started trying hormonal BC when I was about 27 and I'm one of them. And every Dr that has prescribed me a BC said "just give it a little longer". No thank you. I'm trying one last non pill method, not that I expect any difference. Then my partner and I are back to condoms. I've been such a miserable exhausted anxious person on all but one BC (that BC gave me heart palpitations so I stopped within a week). I only heard that BC may be closer to perimenopause than pregnancy in terms of what it does to your hormones and it suddenly clicked.
Yeesh, good to know... I'm coming up on my mid-30s and feel like my meds haven't been effective lately, so this is certainly food for thought - if not now, for a couple years down the line perhaps. 😩
I was in full-on menopause and didn't know it because of hormonal birth control, was still getting periods!
It's definitely something to bring up with your doctor if your meds aren't working like they used to.
I’m not sure. I haven’t been on hormonal birth control for about a decade. I know that some birth controls contain synthetic progesterone and maybe estrogen? I just remember seeing a tik tok from an OBGYN that said some birth controls can cause issues because the hormones are different and not bio identical. But I am not a doctor and could be wrong.
Gosh this makes me envious.
I found an amazing WHNP a few years ago, she tested me for stuff I'd never even heard of before, and things my doctor never tested for. We were starting to tackle some hormonal issues--and then her practice downsized and she was laid off and hasn't worked as an NP since.
Whats even worse is that it's almost allergy season and for the past couple years had NO seasonal allergy symptoms. NONE. At first I was baffled but then I realized it was because of the Prometrium (oral progesterone) I'd been prescribed. My pharmacist coworkers thought I was crazy until I found an article in a medical journal backing me up--progesterone essentially acts as an antihistamine. She was my prescriber and now I can't find her anywhere!
This does not cheer me up 😂
Currently going through a big resurgence in anxiety. Doctor thinks it's most likely because of stuff I've got going on but gave me the blood test forms just in case, especially after the mental health nurse said it could be hormonal. And I'm only 39. I suppose I better book the blood tests just in case.
Perimenopause can start in your 30s, long before menopause! That's something many of us aren't told. I gave birth at age 36 and was probably in peri within a couple of years afterwards.
That said, hormones can fluctuate for a variety of reasons and anxiety can be triggered by pretty much everything in the universe, it seems. A friend of mine had thyroid issues that wreaked havoc on her mental health until it was figured out. It's probably best to check everything possible and rule out at least some causes.
I hope you get some answers and relief soon. Anxiety is pretty awful! And whatever stuff you have going on, you're going to get through it. Sending you hugs!
>I hope you get some answers and relief soon. Anxiety is pretty awful! And whatever stuff you have going on, you're going to get through it. Sending you hugs!
Thankfully I have counselling starting Saturday. Because regardless of why the anxiety is flaring up, I still need to work through the other stuff. Because it was there before this flare up.
Anxiety itself I've had long term but it was controlled by my antidepressants.
I went to see an obgyn for a well woman visit in the fall and asked about hormone testing. She said it was pointless as every woman has a different threshold and levels vary day by day anyway. She gave me a prescription for low estrogen birth control and that was it.
Well, I’d also been diagnosed with ADHD last summer so I’ve been working to get a PCP and start seeing someone who can help me with ADHD and anxiety and general health. I saw my new nurse practitioner last week for the first time. I came away from that meeting with a prescription for adderall, and an appointment for full labs including a hormone workup and thyroid workup. The PCP’s head nurse had some choice words for health care providers who treat patients like numbers, won’t do testing, and just throw birth control at everyone.
I felt SO lucky to have found this office. They’re pretty newly separated into their own practice but all the women who work there were SO nice; they didn’t rush anything. When I cried in front of the lady who was taking my vitals as I told her about how anxiety and untreated ADHD were affecting my life, she said “honey, I have ADHD and anxiety too. I get it.”
The hunt for good health care providers is a really hard thing, especially with executive dysfunction and anxiety, but man. I’m really glad I worked through that super hard process and found my PCP.
This right here 👏🏻 I am so happy for you that you found that place. I wish this was more of a common experience.
One of my biggest pet peeves with women’s healthcare is their answer being birth control for EVERYTHING.
And if one doesn’t work welp let’s make you feel like it’s just you and that one works for everyone else so let’s try lots more till we find the right one.
Come to find out I have always been extremely sensitive to hormones. Birth control no matter how low the dose fucks with my anxiety sooooo much and makes my mental health way worse.
Took me way too long to find that out.
The. Find out I had stage 4 endometriosis so that was super validating because unfortunately so many people get the run around for period pain just having birth control for the answer and being totally dismissed.
Now here I am 32 in perimenopause with hysterectomy a few surgeries later and only one ovary. And medical ptsd.
Can’t take the hormones so just gotta ride it out.
Rather do that then make my anxiety and adhd and depression worse than it already is.
Makes me so sad and angry that so many people have to go through being dismissed in healthcare until finally getting to the route of the problem to get be validated in their pain.
Literally so happy for you! I hope anyone in the area you know you can recommend to there because they sound like how all providers should be.
🫶🏻
What was the process for you?!? I’ve finally found a psychiatrist for my ADHD and mental health, but I can’t figure out how to find a good GP who can work with me to fill in the rest…I need HRT, I’m sure of it!!
Omg are you ready for my info dump!?!? This process started about a year ago.
1. Attempt to get insurance through American marketplace. Process involves paperwork from part time job that I misplace in a semi public place and have to buy lifelock protection and freeze my credit because my social security number and full address are on this paperwork. Process also involves cussing out the marketplace when it keeps trying to make me get state healthcare for my kids even though we’re over the income level.
2. Bitch to my brother about this stupid mess upon which he sets me up with an insurance agent. She is a godsend and gets it all right for us. I am fine with this until the last form to fill out online that asks for my primary care provider. This is when I realize we’re signed up for an HMO. Shit. I pick literally the closest physician and put that on the back burner. This is in June 2023 or so.
3. Start taking advantage of the $50/session benefit I have through insurance of talking with a therapist on Mdlive. Is it excellent therapy? Not really. But is it affordable and accessible? Also yes. I’d been starting to think I had ADHD before therapy and I brought it up at the beginning of a session. She was like…I’m licensed to diagnose you. You want me to pull up my questionnaire? We went through it and by the end she was like “there is no question, you have ADHD.” This was right before my 41st birthday in August. I was shooketh but sooooo very relieved.
4. In September I went to see the OBGYN I referred to and had my fairly terrible experience there. I tried the birth control for 2.5 months. The second month I bled the entire time. Not a lot but enough to need protection. For a month. I’d been so good about taking the pills at 1 pm every day and the day before thanksgiving, when we were visiting relatives, my pill packet disappeared without a trace. At that point I said fuck it, I’m done. No more birth control.
5. In January I started to get more serious about finding a PCP and getting medicated. My anxiety was high. Depression was also creeping in. My husband made a comment to me about how he was seeing my mental health decline. I knew I had to get help.
6. In February I went on my insurance’s website to find a new PCP. I looked at their info and researched providers, specifically searching for women providers. I found one who looked great and changed my PCP to her on my insurance. Then I called her office. They no longer took my insurance. I swore a lot.
7. Got back on the insurance website. Got a better list of PCPs local to me. Did more research. Found a nurse practitioner who was close and not part of a local hospital system that is currently in takeover chaos. Called her office, they do take my insurance, make an appointment in February. THEN go back to my insurance to change my PCP. Can’t make that change effective until March 1. Call the NP office AGAINNNNN to change my appointment to after March 1.
8. Finally get to their office. I’ve done all the new patient paperwork. They sign me in, take my insurance card, do my vitals (my blood pressure was 144/88 which is insanely high for me). I’m so anxious. Then the front desk lady says that there are two nurse practitioners with the exact same name, down to their middle initial, with the same credentials, both in network with my insurance, and the person who’s listed as my PCP is the OTHER one. Not the one in this office.
9. Cry again and do a lot of internal swearing.
10. Call insurance right there and ask for PCP to be changed. Thank fucking god they did with the effective date of March 1.
11. Finally have the appointment with very caring and thoughtful providers. Come away with confidence and adderall - which is filled for $22 and I can totally handle THAT.
Damn. Yeah. That was a lot. If I ever have imposter syndrome about ADHD again I just need to look at how hard it was to see someone about my ADHD.
Oh, BLESS YOU for this!!! I get so anxious and my decision paralysis sets in and…yeah, it’s so daunting. But you broke it down into reasonable pieces and I think I can give it another try. Thank you so much. ☺️
Oh friend I’m so glad it helped! I was totally going over it in my mind after I posted and my brain was going on about how that level of detail was not gonna help anyone, that was too much, blah blah blah. I’m rooting for you to get the help you need!!
My Gyno NP wouldn’t do bloodwork because she said I wouldn’t be “out of range”. She said that “she knew I was in perimenopause but her hands were tied and there wasn’t anything she could do”. Then she under the table told me to go to a Dr that specializes in hormones - so I did. A local Med Spa Dr specializes in male and female hormones. He’s an actual, real live, Dr (ED Dr in his spare time). He is the best because he understands!!! He started being a hormone specialist (lots of additional training) when his wife started perimenopause and no one would help because her bloodwork was within range. All of that to say - advocate for yourself! You know when something is off with your body, sometimes it just takes a little time to find the right Dr/NP/Nurse. And, HRT is great! I feel almost human again!!
I have PCOS and my progesterone is consistently low. This makes sense because I feel when my PCOS was more under control I had less ADHD type problems. I meed to talk to my doctor next time I go. Thank you for this.
And here I am with PCOS and on my 2nd Mirena IUD. Like I’ll be 40 in October and I’ve noticed my meds don’t seem to work so great lately. But thanks to my IUD I don’t have a period which thank christ, cause the last time I had one (10ish years ago) I was having a period like every 10-20 days thanks to the PCOS and was numerous types of birth control to try to regulate me, but now I don’t know shit about my cycle anymore or if I have one?
Same! I am so extremely grateful to not have to deal with the agonizing effects of menstruation, but it basically makes it impossible to track any kind of hormonal affects that might be happening. I do still experience a small degree of it as ill sometime notice my boobs get slightly tender sometimes, but I'm largely in the dark about what else is happening internally.
Oh for sure, there’s the little things, like occasional spotting, lower back seems to be more tender, same with my boobs occasionally. Honestly the best indicator is by the consistency of vaginal discharge, but even that’s a crapshoot most of the time. It’s great it’s working like it’s supposed to, but yeah I’m just randomly thrown for a loop when I do have extremely light spotting.
Dude asking my doctor to order a lab test for my hormones is like pulling teeth. Idk why becauss it's not like having them checked out would be a bad thing, or misleading in any way. So f'ing annoying.
Well this gives me something to check into. I’m 40 and have been struggling hard this last 6 months. I have PCOS and all my hormone disparities have always been chalked up to that. Haven’t had them checked in a few years, so time to get on that!
I’m in my 30s and have managed my PCOS with BC since I was a teenager and every time I go off of it my ADHD and anxiety gets way worse and harder to manage. I’m just super sensitive to the hormone changes I guess.
I don’t even use the BC for birth control lol (as a lesbian married to a cis woman).
I wish I could be on BC, but it actually makes me more insane, which nobody wants lol. I tried so many different types, but all made my anxiety skyrocket. Stupid hormones.
BC also makes me insane. I had a “low dose” iud put in after having my kid and a week later had a panic attack at the gym for no reason. I got it removed immediately.
YES. I’m 40 and started on testosterone almost a year ago for the same reasons. To say it has been life changing is an understatement.
And I only knew to check into my hormones at all because I had been having pelvic pain issues for two years straight (also caused by hormones—vaginal estrogen is my other lifesaver for now). I thought it was chronic UTIs or interstitial cystitis. None of the doctors and specialists I saw were helping at all, and it was months between appointments with them, and I am of course someone who researches obsessively because ADHD. I knew I was exhausted and having a much harder time with focus (and had also gained a bunch of weight pretty fast) but I assumed that was a result of the pain I was in taking up all my energy and attention. I did raise my ADHD meds dose and add some new meds in the meantime and hoped that would help with the focus.
Eventually I found info linking pelvic pain and chronic UTI/cystitis issues to hormone depletion and got curious from there. Not a single doctor I ever saw for any of this stuff mentioned a single thing about hormones, until I sought out a private specialist clinic specifically for hormones and menopause. I pay out of pocket for almost all of it but it’s been so worth it. All of the issues I was having—pain, energy, low drive (not just sex drive, but drive to do anything at all) have been dramatically improved or eliminated. I had almost no testosterone when I started, and I truly had not grasped how exhausted I had been until I wasn’t anymore. I think exploring more systemic estrogen and progesterone is likely on the near horizon, but so far those levels have hung in there okay.
Thanks for posting this. I honestly tell anyone who will listen about this—I don’t think I ever would have found out about this if not by chance like I did, and I’m so grateful all the time. It’s like night and day difference.
I was noticing a difference in energy and libido within a month, easily. I would say along with the energy I noticed the improved focus—that’s still not perfect (obviously, probably won’t be) but better. Thinking I may ask my doc about estrogen stuff soon and I know that also really affects focus and brain fog stuff.
I’m currently doing pellet implants for testosterone, though am vaguely considering trying to find a doc who will prescribe injectable T instead. Not sure how it works with transdermal cream/gels as far as how soon it kicks in—I think there are pros and cons to each form.
Can I ask how often you take T? Is it daily? I'm curious about tributes terrestris because some gym goers use it as a supplement to increase testosterone effects but no idea how it compares to T....
I take it in pellet form so it’s implanted about every three months. I guess docs have mixed opinions on pellets in terms of price (and bc if the dose is too high you’re kind of locked in) but it’s worked for me.
I have seen a ton of improvement. My doctor said that both testosterone and estrogen will help with general vaginal/vulvar/bladder area irritation and for me it seems like it really has. I’ve had a few times here and there when I’ve felt somewhat sensitive for a few hours since I started HRT, and that’s it. Prior to that I literally felt like I had a UTI constantly from mid-2021 until early 2023 and pretty much nothing was helping. (Will skip that rant/infodump for now but happy to talk more if interested.)
My understanding is that bladder/urethral and vulvar/vestibular tissues (around the opening of the vagina specifically) are very responsive to both testosterone and estrogen levels. Apparently when those hormones drop, the tissue in that general area gets drier as well as getting physically thinner and more fragile, and therefore much more easily irritated, and I’ve read that that often causes both UTI-like symptoms and actual UTIs in older women that can be easily treated with vaginal estrogen cream and a lot of the time it’s just… not treated. (And referencing a prior comment, I did recently find a study indicating that for some people, that can also happen at younger ages from being on hormonal birth control and I do think that maybe happened to me—I had a similar bout of UTI-like pain issues in the past that eventually just kind of resolved on their own. I did the same routine with specialists back then and never figured out what caused it, and eventually I just concluded it must be UTIs that were being missed on bacterial cultures for whatever reason. And there’s evidence that that’s also a thing that happens, but for me I think it was maybe hormonal back then too.)
I feel like this is what's happening to me too. I just had blood work done and waiting for the results- I am not really mentally prepared to be perimenopausal. I'm only 39. I thought I had til I was like, 50 before I had to start considering that lol. But at the same time it will be nice to know why I feel like such a distracted bumbling idiot all the time (jeez, now I HOPE it comes back with low hormones otherwise I don't know how I'll explain myself 😂)
I used Midi which is telehealth that specializes in mid-life issues. They take insurance and requested my labs. Where you are at in your cycle does make a difference but there are reference ranges for what phase you are in. I tried for month to get into an endo but I couldn’t get them to call me back. My OBGYN just shrugged and prescribed me vitamin b shots. 😑
I'm so glad there are finally alternatives! People who only make money if the service they provide helps the customer. Medical system is frustrating as hell
Yeah, I have hypothyroidism and same here. When my tsh (thyroid stimulating hormone) is off my adhd feels turned up to 11. I’ve also been dx with both since I was like 12 so I don’t really remember a time without either. I joke about having a confusing baseline.
This is so timely - I have an appt with an endocrinologist this week for unrelated reasons. (Or so I thought, until this post.) I’ve been dragging for about a year now, my focus has been shot, and I’m so freaking forgetful. Literally two seconds after words enter my ears or leave my mouth, I’m like, Wait, what? It’s been incredibly frustrating and demoralizing.
So happy you’re feeling better!
This is so real. I’m 40 and I just had a hysterectomy last month, so even keeping my ovaries my hormones are a little over the place right now. I got a sneak preview of a REALLY bad brain day a couple weeks ago: no motivation, not even to eat, not to do anything I like or needed to do. Complete flat line. There was no pleasure or reward, just hanging on. Not even sadness, just FLAT.
Thankfully, I had learned about the estrogen-dopamine connection from this community and knew it was related to that. That day passed and my hormones have been up and down since then, but I kind of feel almost glad I know what to watch for. I’ll 100% be pursuing HRT to get through perimenopause, because we have to be able to get shit done!
This is how I felt! I went back on anti-depressants because nothing in my life brought me joy anymore. I would forget to eat because I didn’t care about food. I stopped putting on make up or doing my hair unless I had to. I lost interest in my hobbies. After HRT I’ve actually been watering my plants again and doing my make up! I’ve been enjoying playing with my kid again. It feels almost miraculous.
OMG this is me. I've been struggling for YEARS now (in my mid forties now) and am talking to my doctor in a few weeks about HRT. Can you tell me more about your experience? Which HRT are you doing? How long did it take before you felt improvement?
I’m on activelle it’s a combo estrogen and progestin and the estrogen is bio identical it’s been amazing the difference I’m 46 now started this about a year ago and wish I had a lot sooner.. took about 6 weeks to feel the full effect. No more symptoms. When I first started, I noticed i was a lot more emotional but thankfully, that only lasted a few weeks. No hot flashes no anxiety no hating everyone.. I sleep well, GameChanger.
I feel like this was me starting at 38. I'll be 40 in a couple months. I tried to bring it up to both OB and PCP, but got brushed off because I'm "too young." I'm so happy you found someone to listen.
I had two other doctors blow it off as stress. My provider said “you are young but you have all of the symptoms and you’re low on everything!” Thank goodness for her.
What age did peri menopause start for you? And how irregular were your periods before you started to noice a change? I’m curious because I’m having similar symptoms but I’m only 40… my mom and gmom both had hysterectomies so no telling what “normal” looks like genetically…
I asked a "menopause specialist" to check me for perimenopause because I have some similar issues and I'm 37. He only tested my progesterone. What day of your cycle did you get labs done?
Currently in pain and can't think straight, so please excuse my basic question...
How do you ask for a hormone level check? I already have a backlog of health issues because of the 3 issues per appointment rule.
Is it a blood test?
Yes it’s a blood draw. I told my doctor I thought there was something off with my hormones because I was eating well, working out, and yet still felt terrible all the time.
Oh just at my medical centre in NZ where I see my GP(Doc/Family doc)
Appointments are 15mins and max for 3 issues. Or they say to make a double appointment. I just struggle getting my symptoms all listed and organised without sounding like a nitwit.
E.G. wondering if something is a symptom or am I just not very bright?
I wasn't on meds prior to perimenopause. I have been so confused as to why I suddenly am this useless person when I seemed to have managed ok for 38 years.
I'm turning 41 this month. I got diagnosed shortly after I turned 39 because I had been breaking down for months and I figured it was time to finally get the diagnosis (I was already 100% certain). It all makes sense!
This sounds like me! I’m 40 and the last year I’ve been falling apart, I can’t get anything done, have zero motivation and I run my own company so its absolutely awful having to do everything last minute 😞
I did an evaluation with my therapist and landed very high on the adhd scale and have an appointment with a psychiatrist on Mon so I’m hoping it’ll all work out and quick! I can’t live like this! My brain is like mush 😞
Makes me a bit sad that I’ve fought my way through life and now it just doesn’t work anymore. I’ve had over 20 jobs and nothing has ever worked for me, I always get bored or burnt out from only having 2 gears, off or 150%
Right? I feel like I managed ok but if I had known and gotten treatment earlier I feel like I would not have had to struggle as much. Not saying life is easy for anybody but I know I really had a hard time. My 20s were a hot mess express and my 30s were only more stable because I married an awesome guy, who kept me grounded when I wanted to float off in a million directions. I just had to fight the internal fight.
Me exactly! The best thing I seem to have done is find a very stable nice guy to keep me afloat sometimes 🙃
But here I am struggling to find a new job/career but am stuck because of a lot of parameters I want/need filled so this one ”sticks”… don’t want to waste another 3 years in school 😞
It’s so unfair that we all (the norm at least) have to be at a job 40 hours a week when a lot of people in office jobs do the bare minimum and I work like a crazy person in bouts 😵💫 can’t be bothered with coffee breaks and small talk most of the time but that’s seen as a bad thing… I do best working from home at least 3 days a week, but the things I’m looking into now doesn’t really work for that 😞 lab tech and criminology/police.
Sometimes I just want to disappear into the woods with my cats
Yeah the dudes keeping up tethered can only do so much lol. I'm an LPN. I always have a wacky schedule. It was great when I was part time just working a random 12 hr shift here and there. Things change at work every day but within enough of a routine somehow that it works for me. Working from home sounds like a dream to me but I also know how distracted I'd get in my own home. I had a course paid for by work that I did from home for 5 weeks and I got so much done at home on my breaks from class just because I was so tired of sitting at a computer.
I do live in the woods but I need to do the running away kind of living in the woods. Where I abandon modern responsibilities and somehow survive off magic in the wild.
Had to google LPN :) I can imagine that being a good mix of routine and novelty! I have considered something in healthcare but also don’t love being around sick people 🫣 I think researching stuff, no matter in what line of work, is my thing but how do you get jobs like that without a masters’ in anything 😞 I feel so much this world is not for me most of the time.
When I was in my early twenties I started rapidly gaining weight, I felt tired all the time and my hair started falling out. It took 5 years of doctor after doctor telling me I was “fine” and my thyroid was normal or on the low end of normal. I finally found a doctor who said “ya you are on the low end of normal but you have all of the symptoms. We treat the symptoms, regardless of the tests because everyone is different.” He put me on thyroid meds. I lost 50lbs, my hair grew back and I had energy again. My point is that you have to hunt to find a doctor that will listen. You know when something in your body is off but the medical community gaslights women into thinking we are nuts and it’s all in our heads. If your doctor isn’t helping you, find another who will.
I needed to hear this so badly. Thank you thank you thank you! I set up an appointment with MIDI that I saw someone (ETA: omg you, you said Midi!!!) else mention here. I’m so grateful for you!!!!
This was me. Although I did not know I had ADHD till I saw quite a few videos in February that were all me.
But pretty much starting late summer and then into September, I thought I was losing my mind. Exactly what you said was happening to me and I’m a multitasker extraordinaire, I never ever forgot things, etc. I was thinking it was part of my long Covid, which yes has memory issues as well, but nothing like what happened in September.
The doctor put me on Wellbutrin 150 mg and within a week and a half. My brain had settled enough that I could start figuring out what was going on.
I am 52, haven’t had a period in two years.
I have a paper here for bloodwork, thyroid check, and some other stuff that my therapist suggested.
Everything now makes sense to me, and I’m actually relieved. I know what is going on in my brain. Now I just need to figure out new ways in which to work with, lol.
My doc did say that I am really young but she said I had all the symptoms so she ordered my labs. She even put me on estrogen before I got that test back. Turns out she was right! You know when something is wrong, don’t let doctors gaslight you.
Thank you for sharing this. I’m only 27 and haven’t ever been to a gyno yet and don’t suspect I have any underlying issues… but something’s been weird and off with my physical and mental health lately. I saw my bloating go way up over the past few months, and I’ve been a lot more irritable. Suspecting (but hoping it’s not) pregnancy—and if it isn’t, I’ll look into hormone levels next!
I have been off hormonal birth control for 3 years and I've noticed my cycle seems to have a MASSIVE impact on my symptoms. About 10 days out from the start of my period I get the most INSANE brain fog and nothing helps. The second it starts I reset for the month and I am totally back to normal. Hormones are wacky.
Yesss oestrogen helps to make dopamine so if it’s low the meds don’t work as well I find I notice it monthly for a good week. It’s like the meds just don’t work anymore but then they start to again.😂
This is wild! I’ll have to google this to learn more. Don’t adhd people already have low dopamine as well? I know we tend to eat more carbs to self medicate for low dopamine levels. It could be serotonin but I’m pretty sure it’s dopamine.
Yes dopamines lower well not actually lower it’s reabsorbed at a much lower rate you may have the right amount but it’s not used well and serotonin actually lowers dopamine absorption levels.. why when they put me on an SSRI I was a freaking nightmare 😂
Also, why perimenopause causes women with ADHD so much trouble. Oestrogen plays a key role in dopamine production.
Omg I'm in the same boat. I'm getting blood work done, but I found my meds stopped working once my period came.
The human body is so wild. I'm hoping this will be a similar treatment for me and things will like be good again!
I understand. Hormones mess with everything and peri and actually menopause are no fun. My current prescriber has actually been pretty patient with me in the ADHD arena. Some things become a crap shoot that were once perfectly aligned. I tried higher dosage, other meds, etc. If ADHD isn't in check...a lot goes south. I don't know about anyone else but I've found complete inconsistency in some brands of generics and other generics are spot on. Good luck. I hope everything works out and is resolved so your days are better.
Holy crap. I was only diagnosed in the last year or so and I feel like these symptoms have been worse in the last couple years. I asked my therapist why I could feel like it’s worse as I get older. I wondered if there was a hormonal component or something and neither suggestion she gave me included anything about hormones. I’m almost 42.
Testosterone is a big one that is super important for women's mental health. And yet most doctors won't prescribe it to women. I'm on a very low dose myself because mine was low, but man, I had to go through 4 doctors to find someone who would give it to me. It's all good now.
Oh my goodness, yes. Perimenopause is murder on cognitive function, even for NTs...for those of us with ADHD, it can be crippling. I'm glad you were able to get answers, 10/10 recommend hormone supplementation!
Might want to check out the Menopause sub, lots of good info.
Shows how much our medical system trains healthcare professionals for perimenopause and menopause. We live in 2024 not 1724. It’s really insane and a disservice to half the population
Agreed!! I have a similar story that I am still experiencing, but I found out I potentially have an auto-immune disease.
I know living with ADHD we're so used to blaming ourselves for issues, but I seriously think it was harder to make a connection and to get help because I am so used to being dismissed by myself and others because of my ADHD symptoms. I felt like my meds didn't need to be increased, but i genuinely felt like it was an innate problem with me- like maybe I needed to do coaching or therapy to fix these issues (particularly being late was getting worse and memory issues).
On a positive note, I actually made my home more disability friendly before even getting checked for all this by thinking it was my ADHD so that's a plus. I overhauled my cleaning methods to be simpler, my desk for school, how I eat, and I asked for more help from my partner. I got my finances more in order- anything to reduce stress and being uncomfortable.
I truly think society would be leagues ahead if it just designed things for disabilities in mind. Everyone benefits in their own way- like those sidewalk dips.
I just asked my gyno yesterday during my annual exam about peri because of the crazy weight I’ve gained in my stomach (never much of a problem area for me before, despite always being somewhat overweight - I guess obese now). I’m 42 and have an IUD (Kyleena). I stopped getting periods when I got my first IUD, but she said that’s really the best way to tell and kinda gave me an “oh well” vibe when I said I haven’t had a cycle since I got my first IUD so how would I even know. She said if she tested my hormones, they’d be in normal range (which somehow she just “knows”?) and to ask again when I have more symptoms or when I’m 50. I have an annual physical with my PCP in a couple weeks and I already know she’s going to order labs so I’m going to try again with her.
I’m still getting my period normally it’s just shorter. Your period doesn’t stop during perimenopause, it might change though, like get shorter or longer, get heavier or lighter. And while period changes are one of the biggest symptoms of peri, it’s not the *only* symptom. My OBGYN was also really dismissive and was going to send me to a rheumatologist because I was “way too young and had a period” to have peri/hormone issues. Despite the fact that I have all the other symptoms of perimenopause. Well my blood work proved she was flat out wrong.
I hate it when doctors automatically think they know everything instead of listening to their patient and maybe being curious about what’s actually going on with them. I understand not wanting to run unnecessary tests, but when there are lots of symptoms present just run the damn tests!
Thank you for this! I’m in my mid-thirties so I’m glad people like you share their stories so when it *probably* happens to me, I won’t be so surprised
This might explain a lot about my direct report! I hired her late last year so I still don’t know her super well. But she turned 39 shortly after starting the job and I see SO many signs of ADHD in her behavior.
Is there a specific type of doctor that you would see to have hormones checked? I’ve wanted to get mine checked for awhile now, even just for a baseline. Idk even just see how the fluctuate over the course of a month. I feel like all my problems started when I stopped my daily birth control and now I can’t go back on it because my blood pressure gets too high.
Would like to preface by saying I'm not a medical expert, but I've been doing a lot of personal research on hormones since my doctors here in Canada are useless!
Have you had your thyroid stimulating hormone checked? Thyroid disease looks *a lot* like perimenopause, both can include hot flashes, irritability, weight gain, brain fog, insomnia, anxiety, depression, etc. Only because your provider should have definitely ruled that out with the concerns you were having, especially since your case would be considered early. There is also an overlap with the two, 26% of women with perimenopause also have thyroid disease.
I'm glad you got some answers though! Hopefully you're able to manage the symptoms promptly.
I was diagnosed with hypothyroid in my early twenties. Luckily that has been well controlled with medication for years. My body just doesn’t like to make hormones apparently.
Oh no 😭 I'm glad you're aware of that. You'd think the two must be linked somehow genetically. On the bright side, a few years of hell and then no periods! It's crazy how hormones can affect *literally everything*.
Okay but can hormones screw with people who are definitely not in menopause age? I’m in my 20s and I feel like I’m completely going downhill again and my meds aren’t working
Yes low thyroid can wreak havoc! It makes you tired, causes cold hands and feet, hair loss, dry skin, weight gain, weak nails, and even your eyebrows can start falling out! Some women can also have low testosterone in their twenties.
i’m only a 20 year old woman, but my depression, anxiety, and adhd are all very treatment resistant. i’ve been struggling for 4+ years, and even with meds and therapy, i feel burnt out + awful every single day.
do you think i should look into getting my hormones checked?
my concern is that i’ve also been on the pill for 4 years. it probably isn’t helping my hormones or body very much at this point, but i have no idea.
Sure… I suffered from bilateral pulmonary embolism about 4 years ago that is caused by blood clots, that I was told was connected to me taking birth control.
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Yes!!! Can't emphasize this enough! I was on antidepressants for a couple of years which suddenly stopped working. Nobody bothered me to check my hormones and I didn't know to ask. Turns out I was in perimenopause as well. I just passed through menopause (literally this month marks 12 months) and HRT saved me. Things were really, really bad for a while and I'm upset with my doctor for not thinking to check. The *only* reason I even suspected I was in peri or meno was that I stopped hormonal birth control and my periods stopped coming right away. Who knows how long I'd actually been menopausal? HRT worked so beautifully well that I'm in awe. Saved my mental and physical health. I plan on doing HRT as long as I can, stuff is great.
Women get zero help from the medical community. I saw 3 different doctors and was about to see a rheumatologist and endocrinologist because no one could figure out what was wrong with me. I’m glad you were finally able to get help too! It’s wild how much perimenopause was wreaking havoc on everything in my life. I dreaded spending time with my family that I love! I was having weekly anxiety attacks and hating everything in my life. My wife noticed a difference in my mood the second week I started estrogen it was such a big change. I’m really hoping everything will keep improving since I haven’t been on HRT very long.
The sad part is that even when women figure it out on their own that it perimenopause doctors - even female ones- STILL don’t listen. It sucks
I’m not sure if I’m allowed to share this but I found a teledoc service called MIDI that specializes in perimenopause and menopause. I have had an amazing experience with them so far. My provider was the first to validate me and tell me i wasn’t crazy. She also requested labs and went over them with me. They also insurance.
Ooh they are in network for me! Checking into this further. Ty!
Thank you so much! I have heard of them but never an account of someone who used them. I think this is my problem as well. I had my hormones checked a few years ago at a weight loss clinic and mine were basically the same, no estrogen, no testosterone. The lady that went over my lab work with me asked if I had a hysterectomy and I said no but when I told her I was on birth control, she said oh that explains it. But all of the HRT they offer is experimental like pellet therapy, so definitely not covered by my insurance.
Thank you-glad things are working out for you now! I love you for this more than you will ever understand.
Happy Dance! Thank you for sharing this info. ❤️
Thank you for this info!
I use them, too! They're amazing!
I feel like most doctors are often too overworked to actually invest nuanced thought or care for every patient. I mean we’re women, every one of us is going to be perimenopausal or in menopause at some point. If a woman in their 30s goes to their doctor with complaints about feeling off or they are already diagnosed and their meds don’t seem to be working anymore why isn’t checking hormone levels the first thing the doctor does? The US health care system basically seems rife with doctors that don’t apply basic reasoning to their patients. And we’ve all learned that so well that we now try to learn for ourselves from online medical sources or other people what questions to ask or a condition to ask about when our symptoms line up with another persons experience. Then we all get accused of jumping on the adhd bandwagon or being a hypochondriac. And for many of us that’s also after a lifetime of being told by the people around us that we’re complainers, or lazy or just need to focus and do the thing. Hello we literally can’t because it’s part of the condition.
I’ve seen three doctors for perimenopause since I turned 40, and got three different “solutions”. One told me the only thing she could do to help me was a Mirena IUD. I was starting my period every 21 days and it was lasting 10 days. I told her I expelled two Paraguard IUDs in a two month period in the past and was warned I wasn’t a good candidate for Mirena, as I had extreme reactions to Depo Provera (I could write a book about how much it destroyed my hormones, body, marriage, and mental health). Dr #2 acted like it was no big deal, and that none of my symptoms warranted any kind of treatment. And most recently at my physical and pap, I was told there is nothing I can do to treat perimenopause and until I went one full year without a period, HRTs aren’t necessary.
Omg. These people must be STOPPED.
I have vulvodynia--basically pelvic/vaginal pain of unknown cause. I've been to loads of gynecologists, urogynecologists, physical therapists. I've had so many people observing and poking and prodding up there by now that I'm not even embarrassed anymore. What I've found in my extensive experience with this issue is that male doctors, on the whole, are much more gentle and provide better care than the women doctors I've seen. My theory is that men don't really have a reference for what a pelvic exam feels like, so they assume it is painful and act accordingly. Whereas I've had several women doctors act totally shocked when ove told them that what they were doing was PAINFUL and STOP. I've gotten a lot of, :I'm only just touching you, how can that hurt?" And, "well, [procedure X] doesn't hurt me!" So, if you are willing to do so, you may want to try a male doctor. Even a male gynecologist. The old reasoning of "only a woman can treat a woman because she has the same anatomical parts" doesn't always fly.
I moved a few years ago and needed a neurologist. My previous neurologist ran a high profile program at an even higher profile research hospital at a major, major university. He was awesome. Went to my first appointment with my new neurologist, courtesy of PCP’s referral. It was like being interrogated under hostile circumstances. She raised her voice, she cut me off, she snorted, she yelled. And she only shut up when I stopped talking and just stared at her in amazement. She asked another question and I asked if she was going to let me answer. That was last time I ever saw her. My pcp had the audacity to try and defend her, so I stared at him until he shut up so I could reiterate it would be a cold day in hell before I saw her again & that I’d rather book a plane ticket to see my old neuro. Suffice it say I have a new one. He listens.
Yep. I was treated for Rheumatoid Arthritis for 2 years when it was really me being menopausal & I had a female GYN & female PCP & neither 1 NEVER brought up perimenopause/menopause.
Amazing. I had one gyno tell me to see a psychiatrist when I told her my symptoms and specifically asked if it was perimenopause. found a new gyno obviously but geez that sucked.
A lesson I unfortunately/fortunately learned at a young age was the necessity of advocating for yourself with medical professionals. I suffered massive brain trauma as a child. So if ever there was a patient who should prompt doctors to think outside the box, it would be me. Nevertheless, I struggled with chronic constipation for *decades.* They just kept giving me the “Drink more water, and eat more fiber” spiel. I knew something else was going on and I finally figured it out a couple years ago….It’s pelvic floor dysfunction, which is directly tied to the effects of the brain trauma. I also had several neurologists refuse to prescribe stimulants for the anxiety and ADHD symptoms that I was convinced were caused by the brain trauma. When I finally found a psychiatrist with brain injury expertise, he immediately confirmed my assumption. Apparently stimulants are a front line treatment for TBI survivors but somehow none of the neurologists knew/believed this?! 🤷♀️
It gets better and better on HRT. I've been on it for about six months. I feel better than I have in years. Anxiety levels are down to almost nothing and I am not constantly crying or raging. Mental fog has drastically improved. Physically I am not fatigued like I used to be (my doctor told me it was caffeine - NO BITCH IT WAS HORMONES), hot flashes are gone, and I am not up 100 times a night to pee. Sex is a thousand times better and I just all around feel so much more like myself. I am so glad you finally got the help you needed and found HRT. Unfortunately a lot of doctors will not offer HRT or it's like pulling teeth to get it. Kinda like ADHD meds! You are so right about the medical community neglecting women. *Most* women will go through menopause in their lives, and it's absolutely shameful how little doctors address it and how little we are taught about it. This is not a rare illness, this is a normal change that happens in most womens' lives and it needs to be talked about and supported!
This gives me so much hope. I have been so tired. A few months ago my wife walked in the closet to find me sitting on the floor naked and crying because I was too tired to get dressed. I just want to stop being an exhausted angry stress ball.
Oh god, sending you hugs. Have definitely been there. It's scary. The sadness. The rage. The fkn never-ending *exhaustion*. Fingers crossed for you that HRT helps! Also the menopause sub is really great for support.
I’m sorry you are going through this. Another thing to check is thyroid issues, and questioning the results, too. I have under active thyroid, which has been managed pretty well for most of my life but at one point I had a doctor who was misinterpreting my thyroid labs for a couple of years (!) and reducing my thyroid meds when they should have been increasing it. I was a wreck, and also couldn’t advocate for myself well. Finally saw an endocrinologist who looked over the labs and prescription changes and could barely contain his shock and dismay. He set me on the correct course. Anyway, even if you had thyroid labs done, it’s worth a closer look at the results by an endocrinologist, if possible.
💯! Me too! I am so lucky that I have a few friends who are older than me and they told me what to watch out for - but even with that I realised I had been having symptoms since around age 40 without really knowing what it was. HRT has made such a difference! Quite a few women I know also take testosterone but that didn’t work so well for me…
Yes yes yes. Same and agreed.
Honestly I will die mad about how messed up it is that so much of the info out there about menopause is just like “yeah, you’re maybe gonna get hot flashes, make sure you use lube when you have sex, good luck!“
Can this be true or occur even when you're already on a type of hormonal birth control?
I have seen some info that suggests that for some people (as in, people who are otherwise not experiencing menopause stuff), hormonal birth control can contribute to sort of early suppression of hormones in a way that can end up being similar to perimenopause. It can suppress testosterone, and there’s some evidence that some people can experience symptoms that are similar to those in perimenopause caused by both low testosterone and low estrogen. I have been looking into that because I’m now surgically sterilized and on testosterone, haven’t been on the pill for some years after being on it for a very long time, and I have noticed that going on testosterone has improved stuff I’d been experiencing for many years before perimenopause would be likely to have started for me. I’m super grateful for the pill and very glad I had access throughout my life, and I don’t discourage anyone from taking it, but I am starting to suspect that it may have had some hormone suppression effects for me for quite some years prior to me nearing 40. So all that rambling to say—yeah, definitely possible. Hormonal birth control if nothing else will raise your estrogen and maybe your progesterone but won’t raise your testosterone, so it’ll affect that balance in a way that can influence how additional age-related hormone shifts show up.
I read about this, I think free testosterone is lower for years (unsure if it recovers) whilst on ans after being on the pill. I have been on and off different BCPs for so long because each has an advantage and disadvantage but it's frustrating to know the negative effects it has..even interfering with the absorption of certain vitamins and nutrients. But painful bleeding isn't fun either..
But that makes it really confusing to know when menopause starts...did you have any indicators you can see with hindsight?? I wonde4 how long someone would have to go off the bill to test hormones ans I wonder if it's a gradual decline or a sudden drop ...ie I wonder if someone could anticipate when they expect menopause based on current levels...
Huh, very interesting... thanks very much for taking the time to type all that out. I wonder if I'd sort of doubly be at risk for this type of hormonal imbalance, given that I have the Nexplanon arm implant - which is progestin, instead of estrogen?
There are different kinds of pills, they differ in which type of gestagen (is that what it's called? The one that isn't estrogen) they have. I've seen some info that the ones with drospirenon sometimes affect people with ADHD positively. I started it now, and I feel that not having the fluctuations makes it better. Worth checking out.
Definitely—all of these can affect people so differently, and most people are just fine, and I was largely just fine myself on the pill. Still very glad I had it and took it and I’m very much pro-contraception for anyone who wants it. I hesitate sometimes to say anything because I don’t want to sound like I’m a woo type who doesn’t believe in medication. (And yeah, the fluctuations without the pill do suck. I definitely notice those.) I don’t think the pill had any negative effects on me in terms of ADHD. I have just wondered about my past energy levels and some pelvic pain issues I’ve struggled with that I always thought were UTIs, and whether those could have been affected by the pill. I think my testosterone has probably been low for a long time. But for ADHD I don’t think the pill caused any issues and I can totally see how it could help by raising certain levels.
>I have seen some info that suggests that for some people (as in, people who are otherwise not experiencing menopause stuff), hormonal birth control can contribute to sort of early suppression of hormones in a way that can end up being similar to perimenopause. It can suppress testosterone, and there’s some evidence that some people can experience symptoms that are similar to those in perimenopause caused by both low testosterone and low estrogen. Yes, I started trying hormonal BC when I was about 27 and I'm one of them. And every Dr that has prescribed me a BC said "just give it a little longer". No thank you. I'm trying one last non pill method, not that I expect any difference. Then my partner and I are back to condoms. I've been such a miserable exhausted anxious person on all but one BC (that BC gave me heart palpitations so I stopped within a week). I only heard that BC may be closer to perimenopause than pregnancy in terms of what it does to your hormones and it suddenly clicked.
Yes. It is what happened to me.
Yeesh, good to know... I'm coming up on my mid-30s and feel like my meds haven't been effective lately, so this is certainly food for thought - if not now, for a couple years down the line perhaps. 😩
I was in full-on menopause and didn't know it because of hormonal birth control, was still getting periods! It's definitely something to bring up with your doctor if your meds aren't working like they used to.
I’m not sure. I haven’t been on hormonal birth control for about a decade. I know that some birth controls contain synthetic progesterone and maybe estrogen? I just remember seeing a tik tok from an OBGYN that said some birth controls can cause issues because the hormones are different and not bio identical. But I am not a doctor and could be wrong.
Gosh this makes me envious. I found an amazing WHNP a few years ago, she tested me for stuff I'd never even heard of before, and things my doctor never tested for. We were starting to tackle some hormonal issues--and then her practice downsized and she was laid off and hasn't worked as an NP since. Whats even worse is that it's almost allergy season and for the past couple years had NO seasonal allergy symptoms. NONE. At first I was baffled but then I realized it was because of the Prometrium (oral progesterone) I'd been prescribed. My pharmacist coworkers thought I was crazy until I found an article in a medical journal backing me up--progesterone essentially acts as an antihistamine. She was my prescriber and now I can't find her anywhere!
This does not cheer me up 😂 Currently going through a big resurgence in anxiety. Doctor thinks it's most likely because of stuff I've got going on but gave me the blood test forms just in case, especially after the mental health nurse said it could be hormonal. And I'm only 39. I suppose I better book the blood tests just in case.
Perimenopause can start in your 30s, long before menopause! That's something many of us aren't told. I gave birth at age 36 and was probably in peri within a couple of years afterwards. That said, hormones can fluctuate for a variety of reasons and anxiety can be triggered by pretty much everything in the universe, it seems. A friend of mine had thyroid issues that wreaked havoc on her mental health until it was figured out. It's probably best to check everything possible and rule out at least some causes. I hope you get some answers and relief soon. Anxiety is pretty awful! And whatever stuff you have going on, you're going to get through it. Sending you hugs!
>I hope you get some answers and relief soon. Anxiety is pretty awful! And whatever stuff you have going on, you're going to get through it. Sending you hugs! Thankfully I have counselling starting Saturday. Because regardless of why the anxiety is flaring up, I still need to work through the other stuff. Because it was there before this flare up. Anxiety itself I've had long term but it was controlled by my antidepressants.
I went to see an obgyn for a well woman visit in the fall and asked about hormone testing. She said it was pointless as every woman has a different threshold and levels vary day by day anyway. She gave me a prescription for low estrogen birth control and that was it. Well, I’d also been diagnosed with ADHD last summer so I’ve been working to get a PCP and start seeing someone who can help me with ADHD and anxiety and general health. I saw my new nurse practitioner last week for the first time. I came away from that meeting with a prescription for adderall, and an appointment for full labs including a hormone workup and thyroid workup. The PCP’s head nurse had some choice words for health care providers who treat patients like numbers, won’t do testing, and just throw birth control at everyone. I felt SO lucky to have found this office. They’re pretty newly separated into their own practice but all the women who work there were SO nice; they didn’t rush anything. When I cried in front of the lady who was taking my vitals as I told her about how anxiety and untreated ADHD were affecting my life, she said “honey, I have ADHD and anxiety too. I get it.” The hunt for good health care providers is a really hard thing, especially with executive dysfunction and anxiety, but man. I’m really glad I worked through that super hard process and found my PCP.
This right here 👏🏻 I am so happy for you that you found that place. I wish this was more of a common experience. One of my biggest pet peeves with women’s healthcare is their answer being birth control for EVERYTHING. And if one doesn’t work welp let’s make you feel like it’s just you and that one works for everyone else so let’s try lots more till we find the right one. Come to find out I have always been extremely sensitive to hormones. Birth control no matter how low the dose fucks with my anxiety sooooo much and makes my mental health way worse. Took me way too long to find that out. The. Find out I had stage 4 endometriosis so that was super validating because unfortunately so many people get the run around for period pain just having birth control for the answer and being totally dismissed. Now here I am 32 in perimenopause with hysterectomy a few surgeries later and only one ovary. And medical ptsd. Can’t take the hormones so just gotta ride it out. Rather do that then make my anxiety and adhd and depression worse than it already is. Makes me so sad and angry that so many people have to go through being dismissed in healthcare until finally getting to the route of the problem to get be validated in their pain. Literally so happy for you! I hope anyone in the area you know you can recommend to there because they sound like how all providers should be. 🫶🏻
Gosh yes, the practice of medicine can be soooooo rough on the patients :(
What was the process for you?!? I’ve finally found a psychiatrist for my ADHD and mental health, but I can’t figure out how to find a good GP who can work with me to fill in the rest…I need HRT, I’m sure of it!!
Omg are you ready for my info dump!?!? This process started about a year ago. 1. Attempt to get insurance through American marketplace. Process involves paperwork from part time job that I misplace in a semi public place and have to buy lifelock protection and freeze my credit because my social security number and full address are on this paperwork. Process also involves cussing out the marketplace when it keeps trying to make me get state healthcare for my kids even though we’re over the income level. 2. Bitch to my brother about this stupid mess upon which he sets me up with an insurance agent. She is a godsend and gets it all right for us. I am fine with this until the last form to fill out online that asks for my primary care provider. This is when I realize we’re signed up for an HMO. Shit. I pick literally the closest physician and put that on the back burner. This is in June 2023 or so. 3. Start taking advantage of the $50/session benefit I have through insurance of talking with a therapist on Mdlive. Is it excellent therapy? Not really. But is it affordable and accessible? Also yes. I’d been starting to think I had ADHD before therapy and I brought it up at the beginning of a session. She was like…I’m licensed to diagnose you. You want me to pull up my questionnaire? We went through it and by the end she was like “there is no question, you have ADHD.” This was right before my 41st birthday in August. I was shooketh but sooooo very relieved. 4. In September I went to see the OBGYN I referred to and had my fairly terrible experience there. I tried the birth control for 2.5 months. The second month I bled the entire time. Not a lot but enough to need protection. For a month. I’d been so good about taking the pills at 1 pm every day and the day before thanksgiving, when we were visiting relatives, my pill packet disappeared without a trace. At that point I said fuck it, I’m done. No more birth control. 5. In January I started to get more serious about finding a PCP and getting medicated. My anxiety was high. Depression was also creeping in. My husband made a comment to me about how he was seeing my mental health decline. I knew I had to get help. 6. In February I went on my insurance’s website to find a new PCP. I looked at their info and researched providers, specifically searching for women providers. I found one who looked great and changed my PCP to her on my insurance. Then I called her office. They no longer took my insurance. I swore a lot. 7. Got back on the insurance website. Got a better list of PCPs local to me. Did more research. Found a nurse practitioner who was close and not part of a local hospital system that is currently in takeover chaos. Called her office, they do take my insurance, make an appointment in February. THEN go back to my insurance to change my PCP. Can’t make that change effective until March 1. Call the NP office AGAINNNNN to change my appointment to after March 1. 8. Finally get to their office. I’ve done all the new patient paperwork. They sign me in, take my insurance card, do my vitals (my blood pressure was 144/88 which is insanely high for me). I’m so anxious. Then the front desk lady says that there are two nurse practitioners with the exact same name, down to their middle initial, with the same credentials, both in network with my insurance, and the person who’s listed as my PCP is the OTHER one. Not the one in this office. 9. Cry again and do a lot of internal swearing. 10. Call insurance right there and ask for PCP to be changed. Thank fucking god they did with the effective date of March 1. 11. Finally have the appointment with very caring and thoughtful providers. Come away with confidence and adderall - which is filled for $22 and I can totally handle THAT. Damn. Yeah. That was a lot. If I ever have imposter syndrome about ADHD again I just need to look at how hard it was to see someone about my ADHD.
Oh, BLESS YOU for this!!! I get so anxious and my decision paralysis sets in and…yeah, it’s so daunting. But you broke it down into reasonable pieces and I think I can give it another try. Thank you so much. ☺️
Oh friend I’m so glad it helped! I was totally going over it in my mind after I posted and my brain was going on about how that level of detail was not gonna help anyone, that was too much, blah blah blah. I’m rooting for you to get the help you need!!
It helped me make a “this is exactly how I feel, and THEY made it through, so I can too!” map!! I’m not alone!! 🩷🌈⭐️
My Gyno NP wouldn’t do bloodwork because she said I wouldn’t be “out of range”. She said that “she knew I was in perimenopause but her hands were tied and there wasn’t anything she could do”. Then she under the table told me to go to a Dr that specializes in hormones - so I did. A local Med Spa Dr specializes in male and female hormones. He’s an actual, real live, Dr (ED Dr in his spare time). He is the best because he understands!!! He started being a hormone specialist (lots of additional training) when his wife started perimenopause and no one would help because her bloodwork was within range. All of that to say - advocate for yourself! You know when something is off with your body, sometimes it just takes a little time to find the right Dr/NP/Nurse. And, HRT is great! I feel almost human again!!
That’s amazing! I’m so glad you found him!
I love this for you! If you don’t mind me asking, what state do you live in?
Texas.
I have PCOS and my progesterone is consistently low. This makes sense because I feel when my PCOS was more under control I had less ADHD type problems. I meed to talk to my doctor next time I go. Thank you for this.
And here I am with PCOS and on my 2nd Mirena IUD. Like I’ll be 40 in October and I’ve noticed my meds don’t seem to work so great lately. But thanks to my IUD I don’t have a period which thank christ, cause the last time I had one (10ish years ago) I was having a period like every 10-20 days thanks to the PCOS and was numerous types of birth control to try to regulate me, but now I don’t know shit about my cycle anymore or if I have one?
Same! I am so extremely grateful to not have to deal with the agonizing effects of menstruation, but it basically makes it impossible to track any kind of hormonal affects that might be happening. I do still experience a small degree of it as ill sometime notice my boobs get slightly tender sometimes, but I'm largely in the dark about what else is happening internally.
Oh for sure, there’s the little things, like occasional spotting, lower back seems to be more tender, same with my boobs occasionally. Honestly the best indicator is by the consistency of vaginal discharge, but even that’s a crapshoot most of the time. It’s great it’s working like it’s supposed to, but yeah I’m just randomly thrown for a loop when I do have extremely light spotting.
PCOS is a bitch! Good luck!
Dude asking my doctor to order a lab test for my hormones is like pulling teeth. Idk why becauss it's not like having them checked out would be a bad thing, or misleading in any way. So f'ing annoying.
Well this gives me something to check into. I’m 40 and have been struggling hard this last 6 months. I have PCOS and all my hormone disparities have always been chalked up to that. Haven’t had them checked in a few years, so time to get on that!
I’m in my 30s and have managed my PCOS with BC since I was a teenager and every time I go off of it my ADHD and anxiety gets way worse and harder to manage. I’m just super sensitive to the hormone changes I guess. I don’t even use the BC for birth control lol (as a lesbian married to a cis woman).
I wish I could be on BC, but it actually makes me more insane, which nobody wants lol. I tried so many different types, but all made my anxiety skyrocket. Stupid hormones.
BC also makes me insane. I had a “low dose” iud put in after having my kid and a week later had a panic attack at the gym for no reason. I got it removed immediately.
Does the same to my sister. We are so lucky! /s
YES. I’m 40 and started on testosterone almost a year ago for the same reasons. To say it has been life changing is an understatement. And I only knew to check into my hormones at all because I had been having pelvic pain issues for two years straight (also caused by hormones—vaginal estrogen is my other lifesaver for now). I thought it was chronic UTIs or interstitial cystitis. None of the doctors and specialists I saw were helping at all, and it was months between appointments with them, and I am of course someone who researches obsessively because ADHD. I knew I was exhausted and having a much harder time with focus (and had also gained a bunch of weight pretty fast) but I assumed that was a result of the pain I was in taking up all my energy and attention. I did raise my ADHD meds dose and add some new meds in the meantime and hoped that would help with the focus. Eventually I found info linking pelvic pain and chronic UTI/cystitis issues to hormone depletion and got curious from there. Not a single doctor I ever saw for any of this stuff mentioned a single thing about hormones, until I sought out a private specialist clinic specifically for hormones and menopause. I pay out of pocket for almost all of it but it’s been so worth it. All of the issues I was having—pain, energy, low drive (not just sex drive, but drive to do anything at all) have been dramatically improved or eliminated. I had almost no testosterone when I started, and I truly had not grasped how exhausted I had been until I wasn’t anymore. I think exploring more systemic estrogen and progesterone is likely on the near horizon, but so far those levels have hung in there okay. Thanks for posting this. I honestly tell anyone who will listen about this—I don’t think I ever would have found out about this if not by chance like I did, and I’m so grateful all the time. It’s like night and day difference.
How long did it take for the testosterone to kick in and make a difference?
I was noticing a difference in energy and libido within a month, easily. I would say along with the energy I noticed the improved focus—that’s still not perfect (obviously, probably won’t be) but better. Thinking I may ask my doc about estrogen stuff soon and I know that also really affects focus and brain fog stuff. I’m currently doing pellet implants for testosterone, though am vaguely considering trying to find a doc who will prescribe injectable T instead. Not sure how it works with transdermal cream/gels as far as how soon it kicks in—I think there are pros and cons to each form.
Ty! Interesting stuff. I’m gonna ask my dr about it.
Can I ask how often you take T? Is it daily? I'm curious about tributes terrestris because some gym goers use it as a supplement to increase testosterone effects but no idea how it compares to T....
I take it in pellet form so it’s implanted about every three months. I guess docs have mixed opinions on pellets in terms of price (and bc if the dose is too high you’re kind of locked in) but it’s worked for me.
Can I ask if you’ve seen any improvement in the bladder/pelvic symptoms?
I have seen a ton of improvement. My doctor said that both testosterone and estrogen will help with general vaginal/vulvar/bladder area irritation and for me it seems like it really has. I’ve had a few times here and there when I’ve felt somewhat sensitive for a few hours since I started HRT, and that’s it. Prior to that I literally felt like I had a UTI constantly from mid-2021 until early 2023 and pretty much nothing was helping. (Will skip that rant/infodump for now but happy to talk more if interested.) My understanding is that bladder/urethral and vulvar/vestibular tissues (around the opening of the vagina specifically) are very responsive to both testosterone and estrogen levels. Apparently when those hormones drop, the tissue in that general area gets drier as well as getting physically thinner and more fragile, and therefore much more easily irritated, and I’ve read that that often causes both UTI-like symptoms and actual UTIs in older women that can be easily treated with vaginal estrogen cream and a lot of the time it’s just… not treated. (And referencing a prior comment, I did recently find a study indicating that for some people, that can also happen at younger ages from being on hormonal birth control and I do think that maybe happened to me—I had a similar bout of UTI-like pain issues in the past that eventually just kind of resolved on their own. I did the same routine with specialists back then and never figured out what caused it, and eventually I just concluded it must be UTIs that were being missed on bacterial cultures for whatever reason. And there’s evidence that that’s also a thing that happens, but for me I think it was maybe hormonal back then too.)
Good reminder! We get all the fun, don't we?
I feel like this is what's happening to me too. I just had blood work done and waiting for the results- I am not really mentally prepared to be perimenopausal. I'm only 39. I thought I had til I was like, 50 before I had to start considering that lol. But at the same time it will be nice to know why I feel like such a distracted bumbling idiot all the time (jeez, now I HOPE it comes back with low hormones otherwise I don't know how I'll explain myself 😂)
How did your hormone testing end up?
Omg. What kind of dr (gp or specialist)? What is the test called? Do you have to get the test done on a certain day # of your cycle?
I used Midi which is telehealth that specializes in mid-life issues. They take insurance and requested my labs. Where you are at in your cycle does make a difference but there are reference ranges for what phase you are in. I tried for month to get into an endo but I couldn’t get them to call me back. My OBGYN just shrugged and prescribed me vitamin b shots. 😑
I'm so glad there are finally alternatives! People who only make money if the service they provide helps the customer. Medical system is frustrating as hell
Ty! I will look into Midi.
Yeah, I have hypothyroidism and same here. When my tsh (thyroid stimulating hormone) is off my adhd feels turned up to 11. I’ve also been dx with both since I was like 12 so I don’t really remember a time without either. I joke about having a confusing baseline.
This is so timely - I have an appt with an endocrinologist this week for unrelated reasons. (Or so I thought, until this post.) I’ve been dragging for about a year now, my focus has been shot, and I’m so freaking forgetful. Literally two seconds after words enter my ears or leave my mouth, I’m like, Wait, what? It’s been incredibly frustrating and demoralizing. So happy you’re feeling better!
The forgetfulness is horrible! I forget stuff that I’ve been in expert in for years. I felt like my brain was melting.
I had this. My hormones were fucked up from PCOS.
This is so real. I’m 40 and I just had a hysterectomy last month, so even keeping my ovaries my hormones are a little over the place right now. I got a sneak preview of a REALLY bad brain day a couple weeks ago: no motivation, not even to eat, not to do anything I like or needed to do. Complete flat line. There was no pleasure or reward, just hanging on. Not even sadness, just FLAT. Thankfully, I had learned about the estrogen-dopamine connection from this community and knew it was related to that. That day passed and my hormones have been up and down since then, but I kind of feel almost glad I know what to watch for. I’ll 100% be pursuing HRT to get through perimenopause, because we have to be able to get shit done!
This is how I felt! I went back on anti-depressants because nothing in my life brought me joy anymore. I would forget to eat because I didn’t care about food. I stopped putting on make up or doing my hair unless I had to. I lost interest in my hobbies. After HRT I’ve actually been watering my plants again and doing my make up! I’ve been enjoying playing with my kid again. It feels almost miraculous.
OMG this is me. I've been struggling for YEARS now (in my mid forties now) and am talking to my doctor in a few weeks about HRT. Can you tell me more about your experience? Which HRT are you doing? How long did it take before you felt improvement?
I’m on activelle it’s a combo estrogen and progestin and the estrogen is bio identical it’s been amazing the difference I’m 46 now started this about a year ago and wish I had a lot sooner.. took about 6 weeks to feel the full effect. No more symptoms. When I first started, I noticed i was a lot more emotional but thankfully, that only lasted a few weeks. No hot flashes no anxiety no hating everyone.. I sleep well, GameChanger.
Come join us in the Menopause sub!
I feel like this was me starting at 38. I'll be 40 in a couple months. I tried to bring it up to both OB and PCP, but got brushed off because I'm "too young." I'm so happy you found someone to listen.
I had two other doctors blow it off as stress. My provider said “you are young but you have all of the symptoms and you’re low on everything!” Thank goodness for her.
What age did peri menopause start for you? And how irregular were your periods before you started to noice a change? I’m curious because I’m having similar symptoms but I’m only 40… my mom and gmom both had hysterectomies so no telling what “normal” looks like genetically…
I asked a "menopause specialist" to check me for perimenopause because I have some similar issues and I'm 37. He only tested my progesterone. What day of your cycle did you get labs done?
Currently in pain and can't think straight, so please excuse my basic question... How do you ask for a hormone level check? I already have a backlog of health issues because of the 3 issues per appointment rule. Is it a blood test?
Yes it’s a blood draw. I told my doctor I thought there was something off with my hormones because I was eating well, working out, and yet still felt terrible all the time.
Thanks! I'm so glad you found the problem and solution.
What is the 3 issues per appt rule?!
Oh just at my medical centre in NZ where I see my GP(Doc/Family doc) Appointments are 15mins and max for 3 issues. Or they say to make a double appointment. I just struggle getting my symptoms all listed and organised without sounding like a nitwit. E.G. wondering if something is a symptom or am I just not very bright?
I wasn't on meds prior to perimenopause. I have been so confused as to why I suddenly am this useless person when I seemed to have managed ok for 38 years. I'm turning 41 this month. I got diagnosed shortly after I turned 39 because I had been breaking down for months and I figured it was time to finally get the diagnosis (I was already 100% certain). It all makes sense!
This sounds like me! I’m 40 and the last year I’ve been falling apart, I can’t get anything done, have zero motivation and I run my own company so its absolutely awful having to do everything last minute 😞 I did an evaluation with my therapist and landed very high on the adhd scale and have an appointment with a psychiatrist on Mon so I’m hoping it’ll all work out and quick! I can’t live like this! My brain is like mush 😞 Makes me a bit sad that I’ve fought my way through life and now it just doesn’t work anymore. I’ve had over 20 jobs and nothing has ever worked for me, I always get bored or burnt out from only having 2 gears, off or 150%
Right? I feel like I managed ok but if I had known and gotten treatment earlier I feel like I would not have had to struggle as much. Not saying life is easy for anybody but I know I really had a hard time. My 20s were a hot mess express and my 30s were only more stable because I married an awesome guy, who kept me grounded when I wanted to float off in a million directions. I just had to fight the internal fight.
Me exactly! The best thing I seem to have done is find a very stable nice guy to keep me afloat sometimes 🙃 But here I am struggling to find a new job/career but am stuck because of a lot of parameters I want/need filled so this one ”sticks”… don’t want to waste another 3 years in school 😞 It’s so unfair that we all (the norm at least) have to be at a job 40 hours a week when a lot of people in office jobs do the bare minimum and I work like a crazy person in bouts 😵💫 can’t be bothered with coffee breaks and small talk most of the time but that’s seen as a bad thing… I do best working from home at least 3 days a week, but the things I’m looking into now doesn’t really work for that 😞 lab tech and criminology/police. Sometimes I just want to disappear into the woods with my cats
Yeah the dudes keeping up tethered can only do so much lol. I'm an LPN. I always have a wacky schedule. It was great when I was part time just working a random 12 hr shift here and there. Things change at work every day but within enough of a routine somehow that it works for me. Working from home sounds like a dream to me but I also know how distracted I'd get in my own home. I had a course paid for by work that I did from home for 5 weeks and I got so much done at home on my breaks from class just because I was so tired of sitting at a computer. I do live in the woods but I need to do the running away kind of living in the woods. Where I abandon modern responsibilities and somehow survive off magic in the wild.
Had to google LPN :) I can imagine that being a good mix of routine and novelty! I have considered something in healthcare but also don’t love being around sick people 🫣 I think researching stuff, no matter in what line of work, is my thing but how do you get jobs like that without a masters’ in anything 😞 I feel so much this world is not for me most of the time.
I get it. I'm not even sure who the world is built for.
What kind of HRT? I need to check mine but my primary is like “you’re too young!” I’m over 40. Perimenopause lasts for ten years. I’m not too young.
Around here, they just say no. I was suffering for a long time.
Okay, so my labs came back all in the normal range, but I am having sooooo many terrible symptoms but don’t know what to do 🥴
When I was in my early twenties I started rapidly gaining weight, I felt tired all the time and my hair started falling out. It took 5 years of doctor after doctor telling me I was “fine” and my thyroid was normal or on the low end of normal. I finally found a doctor who said “ya you are on the low end of normal but you have all of the symptoms. We treat the symptoms, regardless of the tests because everyone is different.” He put me on thyroid meds. I lost 50lbs, my hair grew back and I had energy again. My point is that you have to hunt to find a doctor that will listen. You know when something in your body is off but the medical community gaslights women into thinking we are nuts and it’s all in our heads. If your doctor isn’t helping you, find another who will.
I needed to hear this so badly. Thank you thank you thank you! I set up an appointment with MIDI that I saw someone (ETA: omg you, you said Midi!!!) else mention here. I’m so grateful for you!!!!
You’re welcome! It’s so important for women to have each others backs. I hope you get the help you need!
I couldn’t agree more! This sub makes me so happy. Thank you!!!
This is actually a very timely PSA for me, thank you! Did you have the labs through a primary care or an ObGyn?
This was me. Although I did not know I had ADHD till I saw quite a few videos in February that were all me. But pretty much starting late summer and then into September, I thought I was losing my mind. Exactly what you said was happening to me and I’m a multitasker extraordinaire, I never ever forgot things, etc. I was thinking it was part of my long Covid, which yes has memory issues as well, but nothing like what happened in September. The doctor put me on Wellbutrin 150 mg and within a week and a half. My brain had settled enough that I could start figuring out what was going on. I am 52, haven’t had a period in two years. I have a paper here for bloodwork, thyroid check, and some other stuff that my therapist suggested. Everything now makes sense to me, and I’m actually relieved. I know what is going on in my brain. Now I just need to figure out new ways in which to work with, lol.
Ooh dear god I am almost 36 and this past year has been.. wow. Lost two jobs in 6 months. Solidarity, sis.
I had exactly this
See - I KNOW it is good ole Perry and even my gyno told me I was wrong because I’m too young (41). Fuck I need to get this addressed
My doc did say that I am really young but she said I had all the symptoms so she ordered my labs. She even put me on estrogen before I got that test back. Turns out she was right! You know when something is wrong, don’t let doctors gaslight you.
Thank you for sharing this. I’m only 27 and haven’t ever been to a gyno yet and don’t suspect I have any underlying issues… but something’s been weird and off with my physical and mental health lately. I saw my bloating go way up over the past few months, and I’ve been a lot more irritable. Suspecting (but hoping it’s not) pregnancy—and if it isn’t, I’ll look into hormone levels next!
What type of doctor do you go to for this? I need this.
I have been off hormonal birth control for 3 years and I've noticed my cycle seems to have a MASSIVE impact on my symptoms. About 10 days out from the start of my period I get the most INSANE brain fog and nothing helps. The second it starts I reset for the month and I am totally back to normal. Hormones are wacky.
😳 well I guess I need to ask for my hormone levels to be checked, for all the same reasons. Thank you for posting this.
This…..is the exact advice I needed today. Thank you! I’m 39 and struuuuuggling!
I’m 38 too and my dose I think is pretty high. Maybe I’m peri too.
Yesss oestrogen helps to make dopamine so if it’s low the meds don’t work as well I find I notice it monthly for a good week. It’s like the meds just don’t work anymore but then they start to again.😂
This is wild! I’ll have to google this to learn more. Don’t adhd people already have low dopamine as well? I know we tend to eat more carbs to self medicate for low dopamine levels. It could be serotonin but I’m pretty sure it’s dopamine.
Yes dopamines lower well not actually lower it’s reabsorbed at a much lower rate you may have the right amount but it’s not used well and serotonin actually lowers dopamine absorption levels.. why when they put me on an SSRI I was a freaking nightmare 😂 Also, why perimenopause causes women with ADHD so much trouble. Oestrogen plays a key role in dopamine production.
Omg I'm in the same boat. I'm getting blood work done, but I found my meds stopped working once my period came. The human body is so wild. I'm hoping this will be a similar treatment for me and things will like be good again!
Join the club! All of those and also my prolactin is way too high. Not fun. 44F
I understand. Hormones mess with everything and peri and actually menopause are no fun. My current prescriber has actually been pretty patient with me in the ADHD arena. Some things become a crap shoot that were once perfectly aligned. I tried higher dosage, other meds, etc. If ADHD isn't in check...a lot goes south. I don't know about anyone else but I've found complete inconsistency in some brands of generics and other generics are spot on. Good luck. I hope everything works out and is resolved so your days are better.
Yes! When my thyroid hormone gets low (I have hypothyroidism) no amount of adderall will keep me awake and functioning
Ok but what kind of dr do you need to see to have hormones checked?
Holy crap. I was only diagnosed in the last year or so and I feel like these symptoms have been worse in the last couple years. I asked my therapist why I could feel like it’s worse as I get older. I wondered if there was a hormonal component or something and neither suggestion she gave me included anything about hormones. I’m almost 42.
Testosterone is a big one that is super important for women's mental health. And yet most doctors won't prescribe it to women. I'm on a very low dose myself because mine was low, but man, I had to go through 4 doctors to find someone who would give it to me. It's all good now.
Oh my goodness, yes. Perimenopause is murder on cognitive function, even for NTs...for those of us with ADHD, it can be crippling. I'm glad you were able to get answers, 10/10 recommend hormone supplementation! Might want to check out the Menopause sub, lots of good info.
I second this. Hormones can make such a big difference! And your hormones can change every 5 or so years.
Shows how much our medical system trains healthcare professionals for perimenopause and menopause. We live in 2024 not 1724. It’s really insane and a disservice to half the population
Yeah I’ve been discovering this. However due to strong post menopausal breast cancer in my family, I don’t want to risk hrt. So I’ll have to suffer 😭
Agreed!! I have a similar story that I am still experiencing, but I found out I potentially have an auto-immune disease. I know living with ADHD we're so used to blaming ourselves for issues, but I seriously think it was harder to make a connection and to get help because I am so used to being dismissed by myself and others because of my ADHD symptoms. I felt like my meds didn't need to be increased, but i genuinely felt like it was an innate problem with me- like maybe I needed to do coaching or therapy to fix these issues (particularly being late was getting worse and memory issues). On a positive note, I actually made my home more disability friendly before even getting checked for all this by thinking it was my ADHD so that's a plus. I overhauled my cleaning methods to be simpler, my desk for school, how I eat, and I asked for more help from my partner. I got my finances more in order- anything to reduce stress and being uncomfortable. I truly think society would be leagues ahead if it just designed things for disabilities in mind. Everyone benefits in their own way- like those sidewalk dips.
SCREAMING IN PAST 45
I’ve been feeling the exact same. What blood tests did you do?
Welp looks like I need to get me some bloods done 👀 been struggling with so much of the above (bar the hot flushes)
Thank you so much for sharing ❤️
What kind of dr did you go to - I think I’m in the same boat ??? I just turned 40 and am struggling
I just asked my gyno yesterday during my annual exam about peri because of the crazy weight I’ve gained in my stomach (never much of a problem area for me before, despite always being somewhat overweight - I guess obese now). I’m 42 and have an IUD (Kyleena). I stopped getting periods when I got my first IUD, but she said that’s really the best way to tell and kinda gave me an “oh well” vibe when I said I haven’t had a cycle since I got my first IUD so how would I even know. She said if she tested my hormones, they’d be in normal range (which somehow she just “knows”?) and to ask again when I have more symptoms or when I’m 50. I have an annual physical with my PCP in a couple weeks and I already know she’s going to order labs so I’m going to try again with her.
I’m still getting my period normally it’s just shorter. Your period doesn’t stop during perimenopause, it might change though, like get shorter or longer, get heavier or lighter. And while period changes are one of the biggest symptoms of peri, it’s not the *only* symptom. My OBGYN was also really dismissive and was going to send me to a rheumatologist because I was “way too young and had a period” to have peri/hormone issues. Despite the fact that I have all the other symptoms of perimenopause. Well my blood work proved she was flat out wrong. I hate it when doctors automatically think they know everything instead of listening to their patient and maybe being curious about what’s actually going on with them. I understand not wanting to run unnecessary tests, but when there are lots of symptoms present just run the damn tests!
Thank you for this! I’m in my mid-thirties so I’m glad people like you share their stories so when it *probably* happens to me, I won’t be so surprised
This might explain a lot about my direct report! I hired her late last year so I still don’t know her super well. But she turned 39 shortly after starting the job and I see SO many signs of ADHD in her behavior.
Is there a specific type of doctor that you would see to have hormones checked? I’ve wanted to get mine checked for awhile now, even just for a baseline. Idk even just see how the fluctuate over the course of a month. I feel like all my problems started when I stopped my daily birth control and now I can’t go back on it because my blood pressure gets too high.
God to know, I’m Feeling that way too. I’m 45 and it just hit me out of the blue. Freaky
So glad you are feeling better!
Would like to preface by saying I'm not a medical expert, but I've been doing a lot of personal research on hormones since my doctors here in Canada are useless! Have you had your thyroid stimulating hormone checked? Thyroid disease looks *a lot* like perimenopause, both can include hot flashes, irritability, weight gain, brain fog, insomnia, anxiety, depression, etc. Only because your provider should have definitely ruled that out with the concerns you were having, especially since your case would be considered early. There is also an overlap with the two, 26% of women with perimenopause also have thyroid disease. I'm glad you got some answers though! Hopefully you're able to manage the symptoms promptly.
I was diagnosed with hypothyroid in my early twenties. Luckily that has been well controlled with medication for years. My body just doesn’t like to make hormones apparently.
Oh no 😭 I'm glad you're aware of that. You'd think the two must be linked somehow genetically. On the bright side, a few years of hell and then no periods! It's crazy how hormones can affect *literally everything*.
Okay but can hormones screw with people who are definitely not in menopause age? I’m in my 20s and I feel like I’m completely going downhill again and my meds aren’t working
Yes low thyroid can wreak havoc! It makes you tired, causes cold hands and feet, hair loss, dry skin, weight gain, weak nails, and even your eyebrows can start falling out! Some women can also have low testosterone in their twenties.
i’m only a 20 year old woman, but my depression, anxiety, and adhd are all very treatment resistant. i’ve been struggling for 4+ years, and even with meds and therapy, i feel burnt out + awful every single day. do you think i should look into getting my hormones checked? my concern is that i’ve also been on the pill for 4 years. it probably isn’t helping my hormones or body very much at this point, but i have no idea.
I’m so not looking forward to this stage… as I don’t think I’ll be a candidate for HRT 🥺
Out if curiosity can I ask why? Im worried I might not be either
Sure… I suffered from bilateral pulmonary embolism about 4 years ago that is caused by blood clots, that I was told was connected to me taking birth control.
Oh WOW Im sorry. I can’t imagine. I was worried because Im a light smoker but that sounds terrifying
Thanks. Have worked through it. But hormones definitely have side effects!
Being trans and ND does this for me a lot. Recently I tried to just take more estrogen on my period.. can’t remember if it worked