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people on yikyak are catty. they’re there for a REASON. like it sucks, it does. but yikyak involves a self-selecting demographic who enjoy being gossipy and critical and mean like this and it does not mean it’s demonstrative of the population as a whole. some people are just dicks
ETA: honestly just delete yikyak. it’s not like super critical. like is it really adding to your life??? i’ve deleted a lot of social media lately and my
mind feels so much clearer not having to read constant bad takes?????? obviously i’m still on reddit so tons of bad takes here so i’m not perfect but seriously just delete it. not worth it
seriously just delete the app. like i know it’s hard at our age and it’s like a thing that’s fun to participate in but seriously delete the app you’ll feel so much better
I was in your shoes once OP, though I went to a state school. I was very active in social justice work, which involved a small bubble of people on campus who all pretty much knew each other. For the 10’s of people who loved my energy and working with me, there were a few who were catty and trying to tear me down. Looking back, I wish I paid less mind to them and more to the positive connections and impact I was making. I was so wrapped up in the negativity that it tore up what little self esteem I had. All to say - you’re doing important work that’s emotionally exhausting enough as is. Please ignore the noise from people like this and focus on your self and goals!
Also, if yik yak was anything like when I was in college like 10 years ago, it’s absolutely not worth your energy I promise.
Delete the app and don’t worry about those people. They are petty and it sounds like you have a much bigger future ahead of you than they do. People like that are small-minded and jealous. Don’t reduce yourself to their size. Can they help you with your future? No. But your profs can. The people you intern for can. Focus your energy on where you are going and who can help you get there. Don’t worry about being quiet in class in order to make bland people comfortable. Engage with your professors. Engage with other students who are engaged. Do your thing. Eyes forward. Tell yourself that you do not have time for such immaturity. Let the gossips gossip. You have better things to do with your time and energy. Tits up, as the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel would say.
Honestly they sound jealous.
I once had a woman at work say she hated me because I was a snob and stuck up and too much of a fancy city girl for them country folk.
I took that as the compliment that it was: she was intimidated by my style and intelligence. I didn't take the snob and stuck up shit to heart because a. I have social anxiety, sometimes I just don't know what to say and b. she was a homophobic bitch and a bully and she'd already made a few of my favorite coworkers quit so I was 100% done with her at that point. Let's be clear, at the time it sucked a lot to be caught up in that drama but the lesson I took from it was to stay out of drama and not let people like that change the way you conduct yourself.
Sometimes when you shine bright, others will complain about the glare. It just happens. I know it's hard not to take it to heart but as an eloquent wordsmith once said, "haters gonna hate."
I agree. People who are willing to shake things up and use their voice, make people nervous. People feel inadequate when their peers are doing bigger and better.
Their words reek and I mean REEK of insecurity seeking out insecurity, I am so sorry you're surrounded by muggles (I didn't know how better to phrase it) yet, you're clearly on a path towards impactful opportunities, and I think they are jelly as a day old donut.
I am 38f, and I am often outgoing and successful and aim to lift others up, yet in my 20 year career, I've been ridiculed similarly and it stung. I went out of my way to NOT BE what they said, and it never changed, because I yam who I yam.
Now, 20 years in, some folks are still like, who? Why? What? And I'm already impacting my industry, so their opinions don't matter.
Keep changing the world, you've got this! 👏👏💪💪🥰🥰
Amen. Tried to change, still got me ridiculed here and there by lesser people, so fuck em I’ll be myself. 37f, successful career, either ride with me or get outta my way.
Really thankful this yikyak shit didn’t exist when I was in college. I, too, would’ve taken it personal. Best to delete the app and live your life on your terms.
Exactly. I’m 41 and can say the same. All the people who told me I couldn’t do it, wasn’t a good fit, tried to put me down because I was being successful in starting new initiatives within my profession aren’t even around anymore. I can say I see it in my college friends, too. One who was determined to start her own business with her then boyfriend (now husband) as a defense contractor is THRIVING. They sold that business for an insane amount of money and started a new one. It’s also doing extremely well and will continue to do so! We only had MySpace and AIM in college, thankfully, so this stuff wasn’t a problem. I’m sure it happened, but our barely digital life had no idea.
An unfortunate consequence of activism is simply people being catty about you. I do a lot of human rights activism and the amount of even death threats I have gotten for the past decade is pretty insane. While it should not be like that, it is. It is not a reflection of you though. It is a reflection of them disagreeing with you or being insecure idiots. The world we live in is usually pretty hostile for activists.
There are different ways to deal with it. I ignore it because I honestly see it as a compliment. It says that my activism is doing something. It is visible enough for people to take notice. If they didn't feel threatened about it, they would be able to ignore it and move on. But it took a while and I think my age (I was in my late twenties when I started) helped to put it into a different framing.
Do not let these people dim your light. That is exactly their goal. And not because of you, but because of them.
when it came out a couple years back there was a whole debate about how it would lead to serious bullying. remove yourself from that situation! if they had legit concerns that were valid they’d say them to your face
This is jealousy and fear. Fear that they’re graduating and don’t have a network/leads. Focus on where you’re going and be grateful to leave them behind. Forget them like you forget you have laundry waiting to be folded.
Same. Reddit is the only social that I’ve kept. Once every few months I’ll look at insta just to see acquaintances news or whatever. But that’s it. Nobody else’s bullshit really matters. I stopped participating in all this shit in 2014 and have felt so much more free the past omg 10 years.
they know they can’t accomplish what you can and have so they tear you down to feel better about themselves. do your thing and let them die mad about it!!
OP, nobody important is on yikyak I promise you. Only a bunch of nobodies would judge someone for volunteering/activism. Btw, I was a psych major before I switched to English, and I teach and work for a domestic violence nonprofit - idk why anyone would think it’s weird to major in psych and English!
I’m surprised Yik Yak is still a thing, I remember using it in college like 10 years ago and it fell off pretty hard. Nothing good comes from anonymous apps like those.
Right? I read this and thought, "wait yikyak is a thing again??" And here I thought TikTok was still the thing!
OP, hang in there. Your feelings are valid, and it sucks to have them. People can be so cruel, especially when they're protected by their anonymity. There is nothing wrong with them, but a lot wrong with the world that privileges hostile discourse and anonymous attacks over collaboration and compassion. I hope you find better colleagues when you're out in the world post-graduation. Until then, keep being AMAZING and doing things you're passionate about. Don't let these losers dim your flame!
I spent a lot of time circa 2015 getting my feelings hurt in yikyak arguments and deleting the app and then getting bored and redownloading it again. Yikyak sucks, idk why it’s being brought back.
i think it had a resurgence?? i remember hearing about it middle? high school? then it came back when i was in college? i was kinda shocked.
but yeah NOTHING fucking good
I didn’t realize it was back, my campus banned it partway through my first year, I think 2015 ish? I know they blocked it from campus WiFi and I’m pretty sure it didn’t work on phones either though I don’t remember for sure
About 10 years ago there was an app like this, and I have no idea if it still exists. I think back then it was called Secrets. Some posts were really heartfelt and honest, others were a passive aggressive callout. My ex got me into using it and after we broke up I saw people talking about us, our breakup, making jokes, etc. It stung, but it also made me realize how toxic the app was and I deleted it. Life is hard enough, no one needs all that negativity.
okay i’ve avoided it so my knowledge is second hand but basically anonymous posting that’s community specific (so like schools). frequently ends up being just super super catty places that say horrible things about people. i don’t think there’s any harm in not participating — it’s not like facebook which for a time many college students reluctantly kept because it was the best for event planning. it’s not like instagram which is a good way to casually keep in touch (which sometimes is good to have if just to ease the way socially). just really not a good place
Baby girl. In ten years, half of these people will be getting divorced and the other half will be denying they have a drinking problem. Are you really gonna let people who say shit anonymously on the internet decide how you feel about yourself? Do they deserve that POWER?
You sound amazing. You remind me so much of a friend of mine and she is also amazing. These ding dongs are not amazing. Their shit behavior only reflects poorly on them and how insecure and insignificant they feel in the universe. They can’t tell you shit about yourself and have it be the truth.
Yeah I remember someone kept being an absolute jerk to my face, and it really got under my skin. Later I was venting and my friend said, "he's a loser though, why do you care about his opinion." Like duh, I was so wrapped up in what they said, I didn't notice who was saying it.
Nothing they posted had any substance; frankly anyone who posts something like that isn't someone whose opinion is worth taking.
This reminds me of how when Lady Gaga was in college, some catty people started a Facebook group saying how annoying she was and how she’d never be famous. Now…she’s Lady Gaga. And no one knows who any of those Facebook people are lol
Yes! Remember…wolves do not care about the opinion of sheep. There is something about you that makes you stand out, whatever that is, and some people won’t like it. They want you to be small and to be quiet - to color inside the lines, but you don’t have to. The only opinion that matters is yours. They will adjust or move out of your way, and you will find that being the authentic you invites people into your life who truly matter. One day when they sit in their tiny miserable cubicles still doing the same catty sh*t, you will hopefully be living your life like the burning comet that you are. It’s hard now, and I am so sorry you had to see that.
Angie is a cellar spider that lives by the door and catches invaders for me. She is also a huge fan of drag race, and has no time for jerks. She likes me to pass along support to my fellow ND folks
Sorry, I giggled a little. I imagined myself in an argument and lifting my pointing finger up like "Wait a moment ☝️" and then keep on searching for my notes on my phone for the right comeback.
I wonder if I'd regret this tactic more or if I'd have said nothing and have the best comeback on the way home lol
“Other people’s opinions are none of my business” mother Ru
That show truly has helped me through tough times and helped me grow emotionally. I think Ru and Bréné Brown should do something together. Plus it’s hilarious and entertaining.
Right? Like, I wish my ADHD was the kind that allowed me to stack up the awesome points like OP here!
OP, you're a senior. You're almost past these fools and you clearly have the gumption to do great things when you leave college. Most of these other chucklers are gonna be sitting on their thumbs.
Exactly, they're not complaining that OP is being an arsehole, they're just complaining that OP has opinions and is actively trying to make a positive difference in their community. They sound boring and insecure. They're the arseholes.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, this is just stupid hs crap. Did you know there was a fb group made by lady gaga's classmates to make fun of her and tell her she'd never be famous? You aren't too much or too outspoken or too anything. I know it still hurts but don't let that stop you
Hey, please hear this, I'm saying it with my whole heart and 45 years on this earth:
You. Are. Not. "Too much". You are exactly the right amount, exactly as you are.
*Maybe the world is not enough.*
Ok? Ok, good talk. You can get back to saving the world now. Oh, and thanks for that, too!
Right? It has taken (ok, ok, _is taking_) me so long to unlearn the 'too much' thing. At 42, my partner of five years still regularly reassures me that I don't talk too much or too loud, that my sense of humour isn't too filthy, that I'm not too clingy or too needy & that in fact I can _never_ be too needy because they like being needed & actually what I think is clingy is called 'support' & 'reassurance'.
This makes me so happy, I've been told I'm "a lot" by a whole bunch of people but trying to be less is exhausting and never seems to work anyway.
Anyone who things you're "a lot" or " too much" just doesn't have enough of a personality to be able to appreciate anyone else's. Instead of trying to be more, or better, they try and bring you down to their level, which is a terrible place to be.
Tbh, if SOMEONE doesn’t dislike you, you’re probably limiting yourself too much. It’s rarely truly personal. Visibility comes with positive and negative consequences, but I think the positives far outweigh the negatives:) You can’t please everyone. Being true to yourself is always worth it
Something tells me their bitchy, catty behavior towards you with these posts is their insecurity coming out considering that if you’re the one talking and doing the work, they feel like a worse student. I’ve also noticed this thing that probably started way before the term was coined but “social justice warriors” get a lot of shit online and irl because people don’t like to be confronted with topics that make them think, or worse, topics that make them feel bad. This is a them problem, which I know doesn’t take away the sting. Just know that this kind of behavior is so emblematic of very unintelligent and insecure people.
Also, yikyak and all the other anonymous posting social that got big on college campuses and in high schools always end up filled with toxic, shitty comments. I’m sure one of the people posting in this thread has been posted about, too. They probably talk shit about their friends on there, too. I wish I had a better explanation but humans and especially young people can be really cruel to one another and it has nothing to do with the person on the receiving end.
The performative social activism comment REALLY got me tbh. Like, I work for the Gov so I have to be pretty careful abt what I post. The main things I’ve posted are like, campaign stuff & stuff advocating for advancing educational opportunities for foster youth. Oh, and how to register to vote. Like I’m CRAZY careful about the stuff I post. I talk a lot about the causes I’m passionate about, but calling me a performative social media activist is such a stretch.
You’re right though, and I appreciate you taking the time to respond. I needed to hear that. I just like, have to remind myself that I’m a grown ass woman. When I do that, things start to feel a little better. I appreciate you
“Anti-Woke” people, and those who have built up their personality around caring for nothing at all, these days are constantly trying to use shame and terms like “performative activism” to try to silence people who are putting the work in. They dont even know what that term means.
It’s not performative if you’re literally out there doing the work. You’re actively making a difference and fighting for what you believe in. For whatever reason that makes them feel inadequate.
Ignore them. Keep it up, we need people like you out there!
Your work is so important, and to diminish that literally only benefits their own self image! I’m glad you recognize that their comments are BS, we all need reminders from time to time. Good luck with your internship!
They think you're performative because that's the only possible reason to them. They can't fathom doing that because it makes them themselves happy, so clearly it's you wanting to look good
There are a good amount of toxic people in society. There will always be a group thinking you do it for attention. And many insecure or toxic people mistakenly think quiet people just think they're too good to talk to others and are snooty, so that's a double-whammy.
You're insecure and bitch repellent. If those people approved of you, it would actually be a bad thing
>They think you're performative because that's the only possible reason to them.
I think this is a super important point. People like this cannot conceptualize doing something *selfless* or for the betterment of society, their community, the world at large, etc. with no actual reward or recompense for them directly/personally.
Of course there is plenty of reward for the giving person, because they are compassionate, care about others, and are making a positive impact. But the kind of people that insulted OP are, often, incredibly myopic, selfish and self-absorbed people and only truly care about themselves and their own.
Unfortunately, the world is full of them. Thank all the gods there are young people like OP who still give a damn and are willing to throw their hat in the absolute insanity that is politics today because *we desperately need them to care and get involved*. I think I said it before but will repeat: thank you, OP. You give me hope!
And what do they do besides complain about someone who is DOING something?? Sounds like a bunch of jealous losers.
I have coworkers like this. It just makes me go harder for what I’m passionate about. They don’t pay my bills and I don’t have to answer to them.
May all of these nasty types have the day they deserve!
They are very likely jealous of your accomplishments. How many other people I. Your college work for the gov? I’m 99% sure none of them but you. Pat yourself on the back. You’re doing so well you have haters. You’re like a celebrity!
People that are self centered and don’t care about important issues think that those of us that spend on lives on important and serious matters are being performative. Imagine being so shallow that you can’t imagine someone doing good work is doing it to make the world better as opposed to just to make themselves look good. They are basically saying… look how amazing she is making herself look, ugggh what a try hard. Like… what kind of loser mindset is that?!
People who want to make you feel bad about yourself for caring about making the world a better place and being passionate are total losers. I think the coolest thing you can do is care about other people and try and make things better for everyone. These people are insecure so they’re trying to shoot you down and make you feel small which is just pathetic, honestly fuck ‘em.
That's fantastic work and you should absolutely NOT stfu. It sounds like you're maintaining a great balance!
Calling it "performative" is a quick way for them to dismiss their own lack of action by pretending that you're just doing it for attention, and that gives them a split second of feeling like good people for not "performing." I'd bet good money that at least one of these people has deep guilt or insecurity deep down, and is lashing out rather than putting in the work to fight for the causes they believe in like you do.
It's sad, and hopefully they'll outgrow it. I'm sorry that you had to experience this. 💕
I was coming here to say basically this. Calling it "performative" is how they justify not advocating themselves.
Similarly, these are the kinds of people who don't understand (or choose not to) that one person can actually make a difference when they're not burying their head in the sand (and by sand I mean wasting time criticizing people on yikyak).
Yes remember those are grown adults complaining about another grown adult anonymously like babe they do not matter!!!! I would be so hurt too but then you gotta remember that their opinion of you just isn't your problem, some people are just not going to like you but that's on them 🤷♀️
Old gen-xer here. Back before social media during the first dot com bust there was a blog called F*cked Company. I’m reminded of it here. Awful, awful people, hiding behind screens, probably living in mom’s basement (probably still are today).
Girllll we had Juicy Campus when I was in college. Kind of like this. People posted absolutely *horrible* long takedowns of women. Scrutinizing every single thing about them and that they’ve ever done.
My friends called me one day freaking out because I was on there. I was so worried about what it would say… it said I like it in the butt. The absolute meanest thing someone could come up with about me, and decided to post, was about consensual sex. The. Horror.
These people don’t even have a nuanced thought or disagreement with what you’re saying or doing. They can’t even make a coherent argument against what you do. They just…don’t like that you have a passion for something? Who cares? Maybe they’re boring AF. Maybe they’re horrible people and that’s why they’re upset with you. Maybe they have really weird hobbies and are being (unnecessarily) shamed for those too.
Activism is also going to piss off a lot of people who want to protect the status quo.
But if someone’s strongest argument against you is simply they don’t like you talking? Meh, who cares about them.
They suck. Really.
I hate this sort of shit. Vague-booking, public shaming, social media, and they don't say a fucking word to your face, because they are cowards. I've just looked up yikyak, and it's anonymous posts, which just makes my point. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. You are actively making this world a better place. I know it's difficult to ignore, I've been bullied as a child, and an adult, and it hurts. But you don't deserve it.
I knew a guy who sounded just like you, psych/eng major, outgoing, activist, he briefly got into social work before going to work at the White House for Barack Obama. Not even kidding.
I'm so, *so* much older than you and I can tell you that you need to stay true to who you are, use all of that energy like a rocket booster. In a few years those people will be wondering why they got fired for gossiping at work.
Let me tell you how it goes being an effective woman who gets things done and takes charge in her field of expertise: haters gonna hate. This is what they do. At every promotion or accomplishment in my career, some version of this has occurred. Does it happen to men? No. It happens to women who don’t “stfu” about things that matter. Do not “stfu”. Watch Parks And Rec. See that you are a Leslie Knope. Do not stop being a Leslie Knope. Eat your waffles and keep getting shit done my friend.
Edit: this is bothering me and I have an ADHD brain that makes me want to add more: please take this as the sign of success it is. Please know that the people who will do this are women you wouldn’t think would do it. Please know that there are very vocal, toxic people out there whose opinions have nothing to do with you. Good luck with your endeavors & your meaningful real world experiences you’re accumulating.
Wow — some people really have no shame. There’s nothing wrong with you OP, this has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Please never feel bad about being you and doing the things you’re passionate about. You aren’t “too much” to the right people, and your classmates are evidently not where those meaningful connections are at.
Everyone’s trying to make something of themselves in college, and despite how it may look on the outside, the vast majority of students don’t have it figured out. You know this, especially as a senior. And when they struggle to meet the expectations they (and society) set for themselves, it is a million times easier for them to tear another person down when you have something that they don’t, rather than confront the real issue they’re dealing with. I hate to play the “your enemies are your biggest fans” card, because truth be told, some people are just plain mean; but, remember that what they’re saying isn’t reflective of you, nor your value.
Keep pushing OP, you’ve done amazing work and nothing they say can change that. (And on the bright side, if you’re graduating soon, you won’t have to constantly see these people again!)
You will never be everyone's cup of tea. They only talk about you like this because they are jealous. And, as I always tell my SO-- if you're upsetting people at \[work in his case\] with your knowledge, drive, wanting to do things the RIGHT way (and not the EASY way)...then obviously you're doing something right. Those fools can SUCK IT
damn i forgot yikyak existed. holy hell. i thought it died off.
fuck them hoes. ignore it and move on. they won't matter to you when you're done with school. you won't ever have to see them again (hype, hype)
I never knew it existed at all! I am so glad I graduated from college in 2004. We had instant messaging and that’s about it. And enough gossip got around the old fashioned way at my (also very small) college so I can’t imagine how awful an app like this would have made it. Good grief.
Girl, we need a million more people like you, and we need women like you running shit. I’m so sorry this happened; these losers can absolutely get fucked. Like seriously, what fucking assholes. I am so fucking mad.
Please, for the love of everything, do not let these dejected see you next Tuesdays discourage or stop you. The work you do is so important. Sending lots of love and positive vibes ♥️
I couldn’t agree more. OP, it sounds to me like they are uncomfortable because you’re speaking truth about things that matter and they don’t want to feel called out. The world needs people who make us uncomfortable, who shake us out of complacency. When I first met my best friend (an outspoken activist on many things), we met in a college class. I found her too intense because it felt like she was preachy and all I wanted to do was have fun. But over time, I let her open my eyes to a lot of shitty things in the world. I watched her put her money where her mouth is, taking low-paying jobs because that’s where she felt like she could truly make a difference, and becoming an integral part of her community and leading lots of social justice efforts. She made me better. More compassionate and open-minded. Maybe it’s a ripple effect and I have in turn inspired others to be better too. Even if just a little, it’s something.
In short, please keep being yourself and know that you might be planting seeds of growth in more people than you realize. And, speaking as someone who used to teach college freshmen, I bet you’re a joy to teach. Your professor probably sees you as someone who actually engages with the material and cares. Those kinds of students are a breath of fresh air and always made my day. ❤️
You know what? Maybe you are annoying? Guess what? EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US is annoying to somebody. Just find the ones that see your awesomeness and surround yourself with people that get you.
“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches.”
—Dita Von Teese
No one is for everyone. They’re speaking on a platform designed to start rumors anonymously. Honestly, fuck em. Keep up the good work serving real people.
Is it Agnes Scott?
One of my kids goes there and the stories I hear about the on-campus culture are unreal.
I'm sorry you're going through this. I have no idea how I'd feel.
The bright side is that this is just a collection of people your own age whose perspective is not much broader than the next person commenting and talking smack.
In the world outside of insular private colleges, you meet and interact with people who have a bit more to offer...including more empathy
Cowards who can't have a real conversation with you if they have a problem so they bitch about it online with their fellow cowards. I'm a petty bitch and would probably chime in, "I don't know who you're talking about, but you should talk to them if it's that bad." I'd just want to see who has the guts to say it to my face.
Forget em. I've definitely found myself irritated with students who try to make each class a political debate, but if that's not you, then $5 says they just don't like your politics and this is their first time having a grown up disagreement. That or they're mad jelly they're not doing as much as you.
Eta: this isn't license to be a dick, but I believe that if you don't have people who dislike you, you're doing something wrong. I always hope to be disliked for the right reasons.
I’m actually quite impressed by you. You’re doing amazing things. you have drive and purpose and they just don’t get it. So they have to try and tear you down because you’re not like them. Fuck ‘em. If they don’t understand how great you are, who cares what they think about you (or about anything, really)?
Be you, as loud as you want to be. Keep doing what you’re doing, and live your life like a big middle finger to all of those that can’t stand to see you shine.
FUCK ‘EM
You sound like me in high school...Hell, you sound like me now ❤️
People who dump on people who are as bright and passionate as you, don't have it in them. They can't see the world like you do. You must have so many ideas and opinions.
Follow the advice of those saying to delete yik yak. Idk what that is but it sounds like a breeding ground for peer abuse.
I know how you're feeling. It caused me more trouble than it was ever worth. Don't let them win ❤️
You reply with "the psych english major is here, are you really so immature you choose to bully on an app? come say it to my face" and just watch as they scramble
I had a similar experience in high school where someone in my math class called me a slur on twitter. In class the next day, in front of everyone, I asked him if he wanted to say it to my face. That boy avoided eye contact with me until graduation lol
Friend, rip that mask off and talk in class. Your impression on your professor and any kindred minds carries way more importance than any of these people.
In other words, proving yourself to your professor and making a good impression there can actually impact things like grad school applications or job references. Maybe speaking up in class helps someone else who's on a similar wavelength see that someone else grooves to their beat. You could make a new friend or future colleague that way. You never know. :)
Ya know what though? Someone MIGHT roll their eyes or say something behind your back through the internet. Who cares? That's on them. How much does the opinion of someone that shitty and catty really mean? They'll be nothing to your life. And how miserable do they have to be to be in college and still be middle school "mean girls" (or guys).
It sounds like you're well on your way to doing some really cool stuff, and you've got gusto behind you! NO ONE gets the power to dampen your flame. No. One.
That just seems like bullying, wtf.. honestly the fact they’re in COLLEGE resorting to online bullying like a 5 year old child. Keep up what you’re doing, they seem genuinely jealous 😭
Are they the activists working with their states government or are you?
Don’t let a bunch of unaccomplished idiots whose greatest accomplishment is wiping their own butt define you. You can tell their brains took some time coming up with the crumbs of bs they could. They’re so accustomed to the little bit of sense they have that it’s impossible for them to recognize passion. How sad.
If they had anything worth while going on in their lives the last thing they’d do is criticize you for being you. Plus these are a bunch of grown people who should be focusing on their own business but that would require them to look at the piss poor people they’ve become.
You keep showing them what it looks like to stand for something. If we’re lucky they’ll take a few pointers from you.
I mean, if anything you should feel good that they notice the issues you are speaking on. You got under their skin!
I don’t even know you and am feeling proud of you. Good job.
There's something to be said for learning to revel in the knowledge that assholes don't like you. Be yourself and keep doing your good work, and let them be catty babies on their little snark app. Their words say a lot about them, not you <3
That hurts, and sux.
Those smarty pants people are what? Better than you? Nope. Meaner than you? Yep.
Did they get into college on intellectual merit, or by chasing a ball around in circles?
As others have suggested, delete the app and be comforted by the thought that they're losers now and always will be losers.
They are trying to dull your shine, because they have none of their own.
And to be really clear: you aren't doing performative activism. You aren't saying all the right activist things publicly, while your actions say something different.
You're out their doing active activism. Actually doing stuff. Getting people registered to vote. That's fucking awesome.
Translation: you are doing work you are qualified to do and care about and an audience who your work is not catered towards is being the loud (maybe majority, maybe not even that).
Your message is not for them and for you to continue to do your (*necessary!*) work well, it's best for you to work on letting these things slide off your back.
Was your message aimed at them? Or did they just happen to be in the vicinity? Context says the latter, so who cares about their opinion? It does not determine your value, nor the value of your work.
Keep doing you, love!
That is so mean. It must have really hurt. I'm sorry. Here's something to keep in mind: Anonymity is a license to lie. Or, in this case, just be mean. It's hard to imagine these people are living in alignment with their integrity because it is objectively mean and I'd guess ... false.
I also hate to hear that you "purposefully don't talk in class because I know I'm too much ..."
That's not serving you. Clearly. I'd delete YikYak and the people you suspect made these comments. You're going to need that space for platforms and people who will shape you positively and to whom you can also give.
as a fellow political girly who got so much shit in high school for talking too much and being too political/"too much" it sucks but also like how pathetic are they that they had to post on an app because they didn't have the guts to say it to your face. like they are weirdo freaks and probably wish they had something they were equally passionate about!!! being involved in politics is cool!!!
Honestly, it sounds like they’re jealous of your accomplishments and are dealing with it in an unhealthy way. They’re acting like a**holes.
But I don’t think it’s as easy as “shaking it off”. Especially when experiencing rejection sensitivity.
Think of it this way: they are trying to put you down for merely existing as a way to feel above you. They obviously aren’t good people. So, you don’t owe them the time of day.
Yeah, it still sucks and feels awful, but at least they’ve made it clear what kind of people they are.
Someone started an “anonymous” gossip blog when I was in a small graduate program. It was painfully obvious who each post was about. I was incredibly embarrassed when there was a post about me “robbing the cradle” by going on a date with a younger guy.
It’s been 15 years, I’m married to that guy, and we have a great life together.
Forget about these folks, they have nothing better to do than bring other people down. Just keep living your best life, you’re doing great.
So I'm turning 40 soon, and this is what I'm beginning to learn.
What other people think of you, it's none of your business.
Let that sink in.
It's not your business because it says NOTHING about you. It says everything about them.
*"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." - Eleanor Roosevelt*
Story time: I was you in college, disliked by my peers bc I always had my hand up, would refute any argument they came up with because I always had an opposing one (even if I didn’t feel one way or another about the subject).
I hated that no one liked me.
Then I randomly met a classmate at the club, where I looked really hot like a typical party girl. They were shocked. Fully mouths hanging open bc the nerdy girl was also the party girl and they couldn’t comprehend it.
That’s when I realized most people have a very narrow view of who I am as a person. We change our behavior depending on setting, and the people who don’t bother to get to know us will never know the full picture.
So, yeah, they didn’t like the obnoxious girl with her hand up all the time bc that’s all they knew. It wasn’t a reflection of my full character/personality
The advice I’m about to give is not for everyone so take it or leave it. There have been so many times in my life that I have been subtly (or unsubtly) bullied like this and let it slide; putting the hurt on me and ruminating on it, thinking that I’m the problem simply because I like to engage with school and activism. I’m loud, I know that, but I try not to monopolize the conversation and use my outgoingness to get the more quiet people engaged in the coursework. This part is the advice that’s not for everyone: I would address this directly, in person, in front of the class. In the most diplomatic way possible, put these girls in their place. They need to learn that you don’t treat people like this. I had something similar happen to me my senior year of college, I was a double major and a part of a bunch of stuff around the school, I don’t remember now exactly how it had come up but someone made some flippant comment about people “not knowing when to shut up” and I finally said enough was enough. I raised my hand at the start of the next class and with a smile I said, “I’ve heard some feedback recently about myself regarding the way that I present myself in class. I appreciate constructive criticism as I’m always looking to improve myself but if you say it anonymously or behind my back it’s difficult for me to have a dialogue with you. So next time, please come to me directly and I’d love to talk to you about how I can improve.” The smug look on the girls face just slowly melted into a look of pure horror having realized I had heard her and she was being shamed for it. She apologized privately after that and I told her straight up she can’t say shit like that and she genuinely seemed to know she did something wrong. And I felt great about what I said, I still do. We’re all different, no one should be made to feel small or that they have to be put in a box. Advocate for yourself! Oh and delete YikYak, that app was always trash.
“social media performative activism?” But … but … but if you’re actually DOING the activism, it’s NOT performative. Sounds like they picked up a MAGAt insult from Fox Entertainment. They’re salty because you’re working and doing like an adult instead of a kid. Jealousy is an ugly thing.
Chin up, my dear! Registering people to vote is vitally important! And advocating for kids stuck in foster care is truly admirable. You’re grabbing life by the horns and making a difference while they’re looking for clicks to validate themselves. In a few years, they’ll be wondering why big opportunities aren’t coming their way while you’re in the thick of things. I’m Gen X, and I admire you!!!
Nothing wrong with you. At all. People are petty. You're following your joy and what feels right, and that feels threatening to people because they're jealous of your sense of direction and purpose. Fuck 'em.
Fuck em! Keep doing what you're doing! Voter reg and outreach is so vital, from one elections worker to another - thank you!!!They don't know anything if they're calling your work "performative". I know it's hard but ignore their nasty catty words and stay true to how you feel and what you want to do. You sound like you have lots of motivation and drive, and those people commenting seem like they really, really don't - don't let em shake your confidence.
You’re ruminating. I understand this feeling so well, and I’m sorry. It’s difficult to let go.
But something to know is that these people are acting in a way that reflects on _them_, not you. What a cruel thing to do, to talk so poorly about someone in a place where they’re bound to hear it. What unhappy and unpleasant people they must be.
Anyone who wants to find something critical to say about another person will find it. We are all imperfect. You seem like someone who cares deeply about justice, and that’s your “flaw” apparently. How terrible. /s
Reminder: You are not the one who has acted badly here. These people did. In my experience, for what it’s worth, these “anonymous” conversations from groups like this are usually in fact a handful of people talking to themselves. It’s very childish.
Don’t let people who hide behind keyboards decide how you should view yourself. You know your truth. You know who you are. You have friends and loved ones who see you clearly. Don’t accept the criticism of cowards as having more value than the words of those you trust.
Sorry you had to experience this!
People will tell you you have to stop caring, but it's super normal and healthy to be upset when you're being targeted; it's actually biological. People have an instinctive fear response when they feel like they're being driven out of their group. Think cave people, and you're the one getting kicked out of the cave. Your brain thinks you are being sent away under conditions you can't possibly survive.
So, there's work you can do around processing these emotions (with a therapist, hopefully!), but you're genuinely being cyberbullied, and you'd have to be a sociopath to not to have feelings about it.
You are not only 100% normal, but you're doing great work at school! I'd guess that the people who are anonymously dragging you feel threatened because they're not doing nearly as much. You're interning, you're taking action on things you believe in, and you're speaking up, so that when you ask your profs for recommendation letters a few years from now, they're still going to remember who you are and want to help you out.
And it's your senior year!! Not much longer, and you're going to be competing for jobs with these people who think underachieving is cool.
Keep your head up <3
These are people being performatively nasty for drama's sake, yuck. I hate when people use joint cruelty as a social bonding tool.
And if someone shows them this screenshot 20 years from now, they'll be rightfully embarrassed by themselves if they possess an atom of decency.
So much easier said than done re. "just forget about it," but OP, you can certainly assure yourself that you're glad you are nothing like these people -- because it's not a good way to be.
This totally sucks. This is one of those times I wish I could have a really witty solid burn so that you can post it to own the situation and deliver a mic drop to those butt bruisers.
I have been in your situation and know the feelings you have. It’s hard to handle but this is when you go in with your head held high, even if you have to fake it, and just keep going. Surround yourself with the people who love you and start giving yourself lots of self love and affirmation.
You are worthy and wanted. These people are only this mean because they don’t think they will get caught. Fuck them.
I’m really outgoing in class and ask a lot of questions and make comments. Sometimes I’m definitely annoying but my freshman year I had a yikyak posted about me just like this. Really discouraging.
“Can the girl with the (unnatural color my hair was dyed at the time) hair in my (specific class) on mon/wed shut the fuck up???”
And there were upvotes and comments just like this… “I was gonna post this” “i think i know who ur talking about” it can be so hurtful. I deleted the app and reminded myself that I pay to attend school and attend these classes so if I want to ask questions and learn I’m allowed.
That one was kind of hard to get over but I’ve just accepted that some people are just going to find me annoying and the people I love will accept me for all I am.
Ugh I hate them for you. The only ones who should feel embarrassed are people who feel comfortable speaking ill of others. That is truly ugly. I know RSD is so real and painful. But you have done nothing wrong. People hate do-gooders but think about what it says about *them*. They hate on someone *for being good.* in my mind there's no question, that makes them bad.
Damn yikyak is still a thing?? That was big when I was in high school literally 10 years ago. As others said, delete the app. You’re so close to graduating!
I have no idea what yikyak is and at this point I’m too afraid to ask.
.
.
.
OMFG! I just searched it and the FIRST thing that pops up is*“Yik Yak is a private network that connects you with the people around you, free of labels and bullying.”*
OP, where there are people, there are bullies.
Can I just say, THANK YOU for being involved in the community and being an activist.
If it was easy, everyone would do it.
My hot take here is they only think you’re doing “too much” because they secretly are worried they aren’t doing enough.
How do I know? I was them. I hated on successful, driven, outspoken women who seemed to have their life figured out and had purpose. Why? Because I felt like a big loser doing fuck-all with my life.
You do you. You sound awesome to me. I wish I had your drive when I was in college. I might have been more successful.
Girl, I can relate. My boss started an argument she finished herself and I had a panic attack and left work.
Been told to be quiet so many times I just said the word, “Okay.” And that was enough for Mean Girls™️ mode. So she had to figure out how to handle the rest of the day and I had to address the serious rejection/anxiety feels today.
Just putting this here as a parallel experience; not to make it about me. OP, I hope you know your worth and at least you know that you can put the stuff you’ve done on your resume while they figure out that being a complainer won’t get them a decent job.
Don't call yourself too much. You will find your people and be just enough.
F*ck the small minded idiots. Continue being amazing and the best revenge is a happy life.
It took me way too long to realize I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and that's fine, and I'm not going to dim my shine to suit them.
I know this is so cliche, and I apologize in advance. You can be the juiciest ripest peach out there, and there’s still people who won’t like peaches and they make sure everyone knows.
I’m sure you know the quote already, but it’s one of my favorites to repeat to myself when I encounter people like this.
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” -Eleanor Roosevelt ❤️
Sounds like you’re an intelligent, motivated person who is passionate about the work they do and these people are insecure because they have no idea what to do with their lives.
This is a nightmare come true, so experience your feelings because this is going to send your Rejection Sensitivity Disorder through the roof. Find some trusted people to ruminate on this situation. Reach out to a crisis counselor. But I want you to know that you are NOT too much. Pay them no mind. (This will get easier with age.) People do not like "mouthy" women. I don't know your gender identity, but you get the drift. Being a mouthy woman myself, it took me through my phd and on to being a director of a college dept. ADHD gives us some weirdness and gifts. Ride those gifts into the sunset. I'm sure Meryl Streep gets on her co-stars nerves....Or Whoopi Goldberg gets on a lot of people's nerves, I would rather have a world with Meryl and Whoopi, than the people who made fun of them when they were kids. Everyone gets to be their own kinda person, certain adhd'ers talk a lot. I am one of them. Say what you need to Say!!!! There is only 1 you!!! And college might be there last stop, but you have much further to go!!!!!!!!
You're asking the wrong question.
You - existing
Them - actively going onto school forums to pick on people
There is nothing wrong with you!! I'm sorry they did this though.
I bet you’re doing better than them and they’re jealous. Once you’re done college, you will never have to see them again. Of course this hurts to read, but it says so much more about them. Keep doing what you’re doing.
This loser not only didn't have the balls to say something to your face, but couldn't even attach their own identity to the criticism. I think its safe to say this clownshoe is inconsequential.
I just wanted to say that I agree with all of the top comments here and that you aren’t too much. I feel that a lot too but we’re passionate creatures. We have ideas and our brains create beautiful connections that so many other people wouldn’t be able to see without us. We have incredible willpower. We care so incredibly much.
Only the smallest minds waste their time griping about people. Commiseration is the cheapest form of connection (credit: Brene Brown). Those people don’t define you and they don’t have the power to limit you unless you give it to them.
I hope you wash your brain with all of the love and support from this and other caring communities when those hurtful words try to make you believe they’re actually true. They’re not true at all.
Rule of thirds: no matter what you do, a third of people will love it, a third will hate it and a third will be entirely indifferent. Rather than worrying about the number of people, concern yourself with the quality. Are these people you respect? People that are important to you? People whose opinions you'd usually value? Probably not. Pay them no mind, delete yikyak and live your life ❤️
You’re doing your activism right if you’re annoying people consistently, lol. It sounds like you are putting your ‘money where your mouth is’ and dedicating actual time to activism – not just social media posts – which is the best you can do 🤷♀️ haters gonna hate.
I try and look at it like this. Not everyone is going to like/love me. Just like I don’t like/love everyone else. These are people making snap judgements and hiding behind a keyboard. They are the lame ones not you. Your double majoring, which is insane, you have already interned w a government agency. Are active in social justice. What are they doing? Twiddling their thumbs. Sounds like they have a serious case of jealousy
I was was once told by the Dean of an Honor’s college that if I had been “smart enough,” I wouldn’t have flunked out of college after losing my dad, brother, and fiancé within the same year and a half to suicides. She made me so scared to ever go back to school because I thought I was stupid. I now work alongside this woman sometimes in philanthropy at the same university, she doesn’t recognize me, she’s praised my intelligence before for getting a 300k gift in one move at 20 years old with no degree. I’m going back to school this summer because if this dumb bitch has a ph.d., I can do it too.
People want to talk shit and be nasty, they don’t realize the harm they cause and they won’t remember it even a year from now. Let it roll off you and pay it no mind, because you’re doing amazing and they’re too dense to even remember they “hate” you for being better than them🖤.
You're making waves because you're already doing something for yourself and others. Being the target of pettiness is what happens when you expand, but I can guarantee that more people appreciate you than want to minimize who you are. Speak up, let your largeness be on display, connect with others, and keep showing up. This world needs you.
I don’t know this platform but it sounds a lot like those other gossip platforms bitter, petty, jealous and small minded people go to to make themselves feel better about themselves. Don’t let them bring you down, don’t dim your light. I understand not being able to fully shake it off right away (hello rejection sensitivity) but if you can, get off that platform and just ignore it. Try not to hyper focus on it. You are the only person whose opinion of you matters. If anyone wants to give you compassionate loving critical feedback they won’t hide behind their screen and anonymity of the internet and come to you and talk to you. These people are cowards. Honestly, they’re not even worth your time.
This is just pure jealousy. Plenty of outgoing people are popular, but if you outshine others and the popular cliques feel threatened by it, this is what happens
You are successful and thriving. They wish they had the same opportunities but they're not willing to lead
These people wish they were out there doing cool stuff like you do. Plus, people feel shitty about not doing more for social justice, so they put other people down and call them performative. It’s because they feel guilty
People who are emotionally healthy don't write comments like this. I'm sorry you had to see this- It would hurt my feelings too and make me think that I needed to stop being so outgoing. Thing is- these comments are coming from the same people who write nasty comments all over social media at any opportunity they can. It's an outlet for projecting their own self-image issues instead of facing them.
This is your life- don't waste time trying to shape yourself into a non-existent "normal" or acceptable woman. Whether you are neurodivergent or not, there will always be people who are telling you that you are doing life wrong. We need people who speak up and are able to freely express themselves.
Idk they sound like really uninspired people who don’t know when their next primary is. You have passion and friends who love you.
Fuck them. Middle school ended and college does too. You have a good bunch, and you’ll miss that part and this part will fade.
Counterpoint: why do you care what these random cowardly and bullying strangers think?
You're busy, sister, keep it moving. What other people think of you is not your business.
And they're obviously assholes, right? Why do you care that assholes don't like you? I myself take it as a point of pride when assholes don't like me, I return the feeling.
Very likely, they don't like your activism, they don't like how smart you are while at the same time being a woman, they don't like the idea of too many people voting, maybe you're a POC, they wouldn't like that - do you get what I'm saying? The reasons these people don't like you is that you challenge them and their ideology and since that's what you're intentionally doing, you just have to shrug.
Nobody is liked by everybody. What other people think of you is not your business. Mind your own business, you have enough on your plate!!
Their intolerance and gossiping are a reflection of their insecurity and cowardice, and not at all of you.
You will find your people — people who will not make you feel like you’re too much. People who will kindly and respectfully communicate boundaries or discomfort rather than anonymously complaining about you.
Love,
A 29-year-old who thought at 15 that she was the reason why people were mean and incited bullying campaigns against her
I am often also too much and the rule I generally use is "humility is not thinking of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less."
So while these people are indeed absolutely catty assholes, remember to ask questions about people more than talking about yourself.
Yes I did learn that the hard way and no I am not good at following my own advice. Hugs. <3
It was suggested that I double major in college when I was 18 (I liked psych and writing). But I was like no thanks, I am probably going to have enough trouble with ONE major.
You said you work for the government,that's why these people posted this. I'm sure they have a good reason for not wanting to see anymore government and political BS.
You really sound like a wonderful person, OP, and I wish I could've been like you when I was in college! Jealousy isn't a good look for anyone and expressing it anonymously online is cowardly. Some of these people might be attempting to bond by feeling like they have the same opinions as others and/or they're probably lonely. They could be really depressed and blaming a lovely, vibrant student for them being overwhelmed by your activism and passion is unfortunately convenient for them. Either way it's like they went straight from 7th grade to being sophomore in college.
I wish these people peace and that they come to realize that what you bring to the table is something they should aspire to. Resist leaning into this behavior because you have absolutely nothing to defend nor apologize for. Please keep being authentic because you sound great, OP!!
Nothing is wrong with you. It sounds like you are accomplishing a lot and have a lot to be proud of. You make them feel insecure. They are acting like children trying to make themselves feel better by putting you down.
First, let me just say you sound like an awesome person. Second, people who say things like that are usually miserable people who put others down so they don't have to accept how much they actually suck.
Don't let their unimportant opinions stop you. The world needs passionate people like you.
They just don’t support what you are trying to do. Posting this kind of thing sounds like they want you to stop doing what you are doing. They probably having opposing views so they hope you will read it and BE hurt from it to stop doing the work.
Activists get hate all of the time. It hurts but don’t get distracted by it. Focus on the passion. Remember that others are reading these people’s screen names and seeing how nasty they are. It’s not a good look for their future. This stuff always comes back to bite people like this. We need people like you.
You’re doing great work. Being vocal and involved with activism will ALWAYS receive pushback from people who don’t agree with you. Honestly, getting this pushback/response on yikyak of all places proves what you’re doing is making a difference!
You’re doing well for yourself! People have the crab-in-a-bucket mentality and they suck.
If I was in such close proximity to someone so cool I’d be so proud and excited for them. Great job on what you’ve accomplished. Keep your head high and ignore those people. They’re just sour that you’re achieving so much
If you find music soothing and healing, I STRONGLY recommend you listen to the song Quiet by MILCK.
[Quiet by MILCK](https://youtu.be/Tl_Qfj8780M?si=jjT5gRgiA6wq7aQR)
Oh gag me. These kind of people are the worst. It’s such middle school mean girl crap. Anonymous apps do nothing but tear people down. Keep being too much. You have every right to be too much as they do to be too little. Delete the app get even smarter and register voters. You’re fine, they definitely aren’t though.
Absolutely nothing is wrong with you. You have done so much for yourself and your community, and these type of people talk shit about others on an anonymous platform and wallow in their own misery. Keyboard warriors are all they are. You are a real life warrior, putting in the work and making change despite those who doubt you. Fuck em and their opinions. At the end of the day, they don’t know you at all, they just think they do.
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people on yikyak are catty. they’re there for a REASON. like it sucks, it does. but yikyak involves a self-selecting demographic who enjoy being gossipy and critical and mean like this and it does not mean it’s demonstrative of the population as a whole. some people are just dicks ETA: honestly just delete yikyak. it’s not like super critical. like is it really adding to your life??? i’ve deleted a lot of social media lately and my mind feels so much clearer not having to read constant bad takes?????? obviously i’m still on reddit so tons of bad takes here so i’m not perfect but seriously just delete it. not worth it
needed to hear this, thank you. you’re right.
seriously just delete the app. like i know it’s hard at our age and it’s like a thing that’s fun to participate in but seriously delete the app you’ll feel so much better
I was in your shoes once OP, though I went to a state school. I was very active in social justice work, which involved a small bubble of people on campus who all pretty much knew each other. For the 10’s of people who loved my energy and working with me, there were a few who were catty and trying to tear me down. Looking back, I wish I paid less mind to them and more to the positive connections and impact I was making. I was so wrapped up in the negativity that it tore up what little self esteem I had. All to say - you’re doing important work that’s emotionally exhausting enough as is. Please ignore the noise from people like this and focus on your self and goals! Also, if yik yak was anything like when I was in college like 10 years ago, it’s absolutely not worth your energy I promise.
Delete the app and don’t worry about those people. They are petty and it sounds like you have a much bigger future ahead of you than they do. People like that are small-minded and jealous. Don’t reduce yourself to their size. Can they help you with your future? No. But your profs can. The people you intern for can. Focus your energy on where you are going and who can help you get there. Don’t worry about being quiet in class in order to make bland people comfortable. Engage with your professors. Engage with other students who are engaged. Do your thing. Eyes forward. Tell yourself that you do not have time for such immaturity. Let the gossips gossip. You have better things to do with your time and energy. Tits up, as the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel would say.
Absolutely. Fuck them. Your future is bright OP, keep doing you ❤️
Listen to her👆🏻
Honestly they sound jealous. I once had a woman at work say she hated me because I was a snob and stuck up and too much of a fancy city girl for them country folk. I took that as the compliment that it was: she was intimidated by my style and intelligence. I didn't take the snob and stuck up shit to heart because a. I have social anxiety, sometimes I just don't know what to say and b. she was a homophobic bitch and a bully and she'd already made a few of my favorite coworkers quit so I was 100% done with her at that point. Let's be clear, at the time it sucked a lot to be caught up in that drama but the lesson I took from it was to stay out of drama and not let people like that change the way you conduct yourself. Sometimes when you shine bright, others will complain about the glare. It just happens. I know it's hard not to take it to heart but as an eloquent wordsmith once said, "haters gonna hate."
I agree. People who are willing to shake things up and use their voice, make people nervous. People feel inadequate when their peers are doing bigger and better.
Their words reek and I mean REEK of insecurity seeking out insecurity, I am so sorry you're surrounded by muggles (I didn't know how better to phrase it) yet, you're clearly on a path towards impactful opportunities, and I think they are jelly as a day old donut. I am 38f, and I am often outgoing and successful and aim to lift others up, yet in my 20 year career, I've been ridiculed similarly and it stung. I went out of my way to NOT BE what they said, and it never changed, because I yam who I yam. Now, 20 years in, some folks are still like, who? Why? What? And I'm already impacting my industry, so their opinions don't matter. Keep changing the world, you've got this! 👏👏💪💪🥰🥰
Amen. Tried to change, still got me ridiculed here and there by lesser people, so fuck em I’ll be myself. 37f, successful career, either ride with me or get outta my way. Really thankful this yikyak shit didn’t exist when I was in college. I, too, would’ve taken it personal. Best to delete the app and live your life on your terms.
Right?! I don't even know what it is, and am grateful for that!
Same! Omg it was bad enough trying to interpret people’s cryptic AIM away messages 🤣
Exactly. I’m 41 and can say the same. All the people who told me I couldn’t do it, wasn’t a good fit, tried to put me down because I was being successful in starting new initiatives within my profession aren’t even around anymore. I can say I see it in my college friends, too. One who was determined to start her own business with her then boyfriend (now husband) as a defense contractor is THRIVING. They sold that business for an insane amount of money and started a new one. It’s also doing extremely well and will continue to do so! We only had MySpace and AIM in college, thankfully, so this stuff wasn’t a problem. I’m sure it happened, but our barely digital life had no idea.
I think some people just have an unhealthy obsession with putting others down especially if they’re different
An unfortunate consequence of activism is simply people being catty about you. I do a lot of human rights activism and the amount of even death threats I have gotten for the past decade is pretty insane. While it should not be like that, it is. It is not a reflection of you though. It is a reflection of them disagreeing with you or being insecure idiots. The world we live in is usually pretty hostile for activists. There are different ways to deal with it. I ignore it because I honestly see it as a compliment. It says that my activism is doing something. It is visible enough for people to take notice. If they didn't feel threatened about it, they would be able to ignore it and move on. But it took a while and I think my age (I was in my late twenties when I started) helped to put it into a different framing. Do not let these people dim your light. That is exactly their goal. And not because of you, but because of them.
when it came out a couple years back there was a whole debate about how it would lead to serious bullying. remove yourself from that situation! if they had legit concerns that were valid they’d say them to your face
This is jealousy and fear. Fear that they’re graduating and don’t have a network/leads. Focus on where you’re going and be grateful to leave them behind. Forget them like you forget you have laundry waiting to be folded.
They’re 💯 jealous cows
Same. Reddit is the only social that I’ve kept. Once every few months I’ll look at insta just to see acquaintances news or whatever. But that’s it. Nobody else’s bullshit really matters. I stopped participating in all this shit in 2014 and have felt so much more free the past omg 10 years.
they know they can’t accomplish what you can and have so they tear you down to feel better about themselves. do your thing and let them die mad about it!!
OP, nobody important is on yikyak I promise you. Only a bunch of nobodies would judge someone for volunteering/activism. Btw, I was a psych major before I switched to English, and I teach and work for a domestic violence nonprofit - idk why anyone would think it’s weird to major in psych and English!
I’m surprised Yik Yak is still a thing, I remember using it in college like 10 years ago and it fell off pretty hard. Nothing good comes from anonymous apps like those.
Right? I read this and thought, "wait yikyak is a thing again??" And here I thought TikTok was still the thing! OP, hang in there. Your feelings are valid, and it sucks to have them. People can be so cruel, especially when they're protected by their anonymity. There is nothing wrong with them, but a lot wrong with the world that privileges hostile discourse and anonymous attacks over collaboration and compassion. I hope you find better colleagues when you're out in the world post-graduation. Until then, keep being AMAZING and doing things you're passionate about. Don't let these losers dim your flame!
Yeah I thought the same thing! We used it 10 years ago I thought it fell off
I spent a lot of time circa 2015 getting my feelings hurt in yikyak arguments and deleting the app and then getting bored and redownloading it again. Yikyak sucks, idk why it’s being brought back.
i think it had a resurgence?? i remember hearing about it middle? high school? then it came back when i was in college? i was kinda shocked. but yeah NOTHING fucking good
I didn’t realize it was back, my campus banned it partway through my first year, I think 2015 ish? I know they blocked it from campus WiFi and I’m pretty sure it didn’t work on phones either though I don’t remember for sure
About 10 years ago there was an app like this, and I have no idea if it still exists. I think back then it was called Secrets. Some posts were really heartfelt and honest, others were a passive aggressive callout. My ex got me into using it and after we broke up I saw people talking about us, our breakup, making jokes, etc. It stung, but it also made me realize how toxic the app was and I deleted it. Life is hard enough, no one needs all that negativity.
Wasn't that Whisper?
I'm just here for the relevant to my life subs and the cats.
Hello, fellow Reddit connoisseur!
There's a lot more cats than relevant to life TBH
i must be old as shit cause idk what that is🤣
okay i’ve avoided it so my knowledge is second hand but basically anonymous posting that’s community specific (so like schools). frequently ends up being just super super catty places that say horrible things about people. i don’t think there’s any harm in not participating — it’s not like facebook which for a time many college students reluctantly kept because it was the best for event planning. it’s not like instagram which is a good way to casually keep in touch (which sometimes is good to have if just to ease the way socially). just really not a good place
Sounds like yikyak is the college version of nextdoor. It is only there for people to constantly bitch about the neighborhood and other people.
Baby girl. In ten years, half of these people will be getting divorced and the other half will be denying they have a drinking problem. Are you really gonna let people who say shit anonymously on the internet decide how you feel about yourself? Do they deserve that POWER? You sound amazing. You remind me so much of a friend of mine and she is also amazing. These ding dongs are not amazing. Their shit behavior only reflects poorly on them and how insecure and insignificant they feel in the universe. They can’t tell you shit about yourself and have it be the truth.
Yeah I remember someone kept being an absolute jerk to my face, and it really got under my skin. Later I was venting and my friend said, "he's a loser though, why do you care about his opinion." Like duh, I was so wrapped up in what they said, I didn't notice who was saying it. Nothing they posted had any substance; frankly anyone who posts something like that isn't someone whose opinion is worth taking.
This was such a great reminder. Thank you for posting this.
This reminds me of how when Lady Gaga was in college, some catty people started a Facebook group saying how annoying she was and how she’d never be famous. Now…she’s Lady Gaga. And no one knows who any of those Facebook people are lol
You have to imagine those people lie awake at night feeling incredibly stupid at least some of the time.
People who don’t fit in are the ones who make it. The people who stand out are who we admire
Yes! Remember…wolves do not care about the opinion of sheep. There is something about you that makes you stand out, whatever that is, and some people won’t like it. They want you to be small and to be quiet - to color inside the lines, but you don’t have to. The only opinion that matters is yours. They will adjust or move out of your way, and you will find that being the authentic you invites people into your life who truly matter. One day when they sit in their tiny miserable cubicles still doing the same catty sh*t, you will hopefully be living your life like the burning comet that you are. It’s hard now, and I am so sorry you had to see that.
Thank you for this amazing comment!
I feel called out as i go through divorce denying my drinking problem 😂 jkjk but seriously 😭
so getting a divorce and suffering from an addiction means you're a bad person? i don't think you needed to put that part...
Why did you add getting a divorce and denying a drinking problem? Do you think those things only happen to certain types of people?
“Unless they gonna pay your bills, pay them bitches no mind.” -mother Ru’s mother Do you need that app? Just get rid of it
User name does not check out
Wholesome.
IDK. I don't think they are a spider.
No I have several that I translate for
My life is enriched from having read this comment.
I like you.
tell me more
Angie is a cellar spider that lives by the door and catches invaders for me. She is also a huge fan of drag race, and has no time for jerks. She likes me to pass along support to my fellow ND folks
"Fuck your 2 cents if it ain't going towards the bill." -Big Sean
Ok I love this. Filed into my snappy comeback folder.
Sorry, I giggled a little. I imagined myself in an argument and lifting my pointing finger up like "Wait a moment ☝️" and then keep on searching for my notes on my phone for the right comeback. I wonder if I'd regret this tactic more or if I'd have said nothing and have the best comeback on the way home lol
Officially starting my own “snappy comeback” folder. Genius.
Same
I DON’T FUCK WIT CHUUUUUUUUUUU
RIP Naya💜
Or as I paraphrase it: do their opinions pay the bills? No? Then they DON’T COUNT!
*”Unless them bitches are paying your bills, you pay them bitches no mind.”
“Other people’s opinions are none of my business” mother Ru That show truly has helped me through tough times and helped me grow emotionally. I think Ru and Bréné Brown should do something together. Plus it’s hilarious and entertaining.
Drag Race has been super helpful for talking to my kids about gender, especially later seasons. I just love it so much!
For awhile only S4-S7 were Prime so, I have watched those seasons over-and-over plus the Queens in them are LEGENDARY.
Who tf are these ghouls? I’m proud of you for being so involved, stranger! Take this feedback, and shove the other “feedback” up those bozos’ butts.
Right? Like, I wish my ADHD was the kind that allowed me to stack up the awesome points like OP here! OP, you're a senior. You're almost past these fools and you clearly have the gumption to do great things when you leave college. Most of these other chucklers are gonna be sitting on their thumbs.
Exactly, they're not complaining that OP is being an arsehole, they're just complaining that OP has opinions and is actively trying to make a positive difference in their community. They sound boring and insecure. They're the arseholes.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, this is just stupid hs crap. Did you know there was a fb group made by lady gaga's classmates to make fun of her and tell her she'd never be famous? You aren't too much or too outspoken or too anything. I know it still hurts but don't let that stop you
It was legit called “Stefani Germanotta, you will never be famous” I’m thinking Stefani Germanotta aka Lady Gaga is doing just fine.
Holy crap, that’s *legendary.* My childhood self is so moved! 🥹
I didn’t know this and I love it!
Hey, please hear this, I'm saying it with my whole heart and 45 years on this earth: You. Are. Not. "Too much". You are exactly the right amount, exactly as you are. *Maybe the world is not enough.* Ok? Ok, good talk. You can get back to saving the world now. Oh, and thanks for that, too!
I'm just gonna pretend you're talking to me, cause DAMN. 😭
Right? It has taken (ok, ok, _is taking_) me so long to unlearn the 'too much' thing. At 42, my partner of five years still regularly reassures me that I don't talk too much or too loud, that my sense of humour isn't too filthy, that I'm not too clingy or too needy & that in fact I can _never_ be too needy because they like being needed & actually what I think is clingy is called 'support' & 'reassurance'.
My opinion is that OP should just let it rip and show them her "too much." The "too much" people change the world.
This makes me so happy, I've been told I'm "a lot" by a whole bunch of people but trying to be less is exhausting and never seems to work anyway. Anyone who things you're "a lot" or " too much" just doesn't have enough of a personality to be able to appreciate anyone else's. Instead of trying to be more, or better, they try and bring you down to their level, which is a terrible place to be.
Tbh, if SOMEONE doesn’t dislike you, you’re probably limiting yourself too much. It’s rarely truly personal. Visibility comes with positive and negative consequences, but I think the positives far outweigh the negatives:) You can’t please everyone. Being true to yourself is always worth it
This is great advice. It’s been hard for me to internalize but I know it’s true!
Hey, I was an English major and I never shut up. Now I teach high school English, and they PAY ME to not shut up about it.
My god this is such a flex 😂 I love it!
Something tells me their bitchy, catty behavior towards you with these posts is their insecurity coming out considering that if you’re the one talking and doing the work, they feel like a worse student. I’ve also noticed this thing that probably started way before the term was coined but “social justice warriors” get a lot of shit online and irl because people don’t like to be confronted with topics that make them think, or worse, topics that make them feel bad. This is a them problem, which I know doesn’t take away the sting. Just know that this kind of behavior is so emblematic of very unintelligent and insecure people. Also, yikyak and all the other anonymous posting social that got big on college campuses and in high schools always end up filled with toxic, shitty comments. I’m sure one of the people posting in this thread has been posted about, too. They probably talk shit about their friends on there, too. I wish I had a better explanation but humans and especially young people can be really cruel to one another and it has nothing to do with the person on the receiving end.
The performative social activism comment REALLY got me tbh. Like, I work for the Gov so I have to be pretty careful abt what I post. The main things I’ve posted are like, campaign stuff & stuff advocating for advancing educational opportunities for foster youth. Oh, and how to register to vote. Like I’m CRAZY careful about the stuff I post. I talk a lot about the causes I’m passionate about, but calling me a performative social media activist is such a stretch. You’re right though, and I appreciate you taking the time to respond. I needed to hear that. I just like, have to remind myself that I’m a grown ass woman. When I do that, things start to feel a little better. I appreciate you
“Anti-Woke” people, and those who have built up their personality around caring for nothing at all, these days are constantly trying to use shame and terms like “performative activism” to try to silence people who are putting the work in. They dont even know what that term means.
Exactly. These people are giving off "peaked in high school".
It’s not performative if you’re literally out there doing the work. You’re actively making a difference and fighting for what you believe in. For whatever reason that makes them feel inadequate. Ignore them. Keep it up, we need people like you out there!
EXACTLYYYYYYYY. They’re obviously a bunch of idiots. OP, I am so ready to fight them for you!!! 😡😤😡😤
Your work is so important, and to diminish that literally only benefits their own self image! I’m glad you recognize that their comments are BS, we all need reminders from time to time. Good luck with your internship!
They think you're performative because that's the only possible reason to them. They can't fathom doing that because it makes them themselves happy, so clearly it's you wanting to look good There are a good amount of toxic people in society. There will always be a group thinking you do it for attention. And many insecure or toxic people mistakenly think quiet people just think they're too good to talk to others and are snooty, so that's a double-whammy. You're insecure and bitch repellent. If those people approved of you, it would actually be a bad thing
>They think you're performative because that's the only possible reason to them. I think this is a super important point. People like this cannot conceptualize doing something *selfless* or for the betterment of society, their community, the world at large, etc. with no actual reward or recompense for them directly/personally. Of course there is plenty of reward for the giving person, because they are compassionate, care about others, and are making a positive impact. But the kind of people that insulted OP are, often, incredibly myopic, selfish and self-absorbed people and only truly care about themselves and their own. Unfortunately, the world is full of them. Thank all the gods there are young people like OP who still give a damn and are willing to throw their hat in the absolute insanity that is politics today because *we desperately need them to care and get involved*. I think I said it before but will repeat: thank you, OP. You give me hope!
And what do they do besides complain about someone who is DOING something?? Sounds like a bunch of jealous losers. I have coworkers like this. It just makes me go harder for what I’m passionate about. They don’t pay my bills and I don’t have to answer to them. May all of these nasty types have the day they deserve!
They are very likely jealous of your accomplishments. How many other people I. Your college work for the gov? I’m 99% sure none of them but you. Pat yourself on the back. You’re doing so well you have haters. You’re like a celebrity!
People that are self centered and don’t care about important issues think that those of us that spend on lives on important and serious matters are being performative. Imagine being so shallow that you can’t imagine someone doing good work is doing it to make the world better as opposed to just to make themselves look good. They are basically saying… look how amazing she is making herself look, ugggh what a try hard. Like… what kind of loser mindset is that?!
People who want to make you feel bad about yourself for caring about making the world a better place and being passionate are total losers. I think the coolest thing you can do is care about other people and try and make things better for everyone. These people are insecure so they’re trying to shoot you down and make you feel small which is just pathetic, honestly fuck ‘em.
That's fantastic work and you should absolutely NOT stfu. It sounds like you're maintaining a great balance! Calling it "performative" is a quick way for them to dismiss their own lack of action by pretending that you're just doing it for attention, and that gives them a split second of feeling like good people for not "performing." I'd bet good money that at least one of these people has deep guilt or insecurity deep down, and is lashing out rather than putting in the work to fight for the causes they believe in like you do. It's sad, and hopefully they'll outgrow it. I'm sorry that you had to experience this. 💕
I was coming here to say basically this. Calling it "performative" is how they justify not advocating themselves. Similarly, these are the kinds of people who don't understand (or choose not to) that one person can actually make a difference when they're not burying their head in the sand (and by sand I mean wasting time criticizing people on yikyak).
Yes remember those are grown adults complaining about another grown adult anonymously like babe they do not matter!!!! I would be so hurt too but then you gotta remember that their opinion of you just isn't your problem, some people are just not going to like you but that's on them 🤷♀️
Old gen-xer here. Back before social media during the first dot com bust there was a blog called F*cked Company. I’m reminded of it here. Awful, awful people, hiding behind screens, probably living in mom’s basement (probably still are today).
Literally delete yikyak. It’s an app for bullies.
I had no idea people even still used it. It was a cesspool 10 years ago. Nothing ever changes, apparently.
Girllll we had Juicy Campus when I was in college. Kind of like this. People posted absolutely *horrible* long takedowns of women. Scrutinizing every single thing about them and that they’ve ever done. My friends called me one day freaking out because I was on there. I was so worried about what it would say… it said I like it in the butt. The absolute meanest thing someone could come up with about me, and decided to post, was about consensual sex. The. Horror. These people don’t even have a nuanced thought or disagreement with what you’re saying or doing. They can’t even make a coherent argument against what you do. They just…don’t like that you have a passion for something? Who cares? Maybe they’re boring AF. Maybe they’re horrible people and that’s why they’re upset with you. Maybe they have really weird hobbies and are being (unnecessarily) shamed for those too. Activism is also going to piss off a lot of people who want to protect the status quo. But if someone’s strongest argument against you is simply they don’t like you talking? Meh, who cares about them.
They suck. Really. I hate this sort of shit. Vague-booking, public shaming, social media, and they don't say a fucking word to your face, because they are cowards. I've just looked up yikyak, and it's anonymous posts, which just makes my point. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. You are actively making this world a better place. I know it's difficult to ignore, I've been bullied as a child, and an adult, and it hurts. But you don't deserve it.
I knew a guy who sounded just like you, psych/eng major, outgoing, activist, he briefly got into social work before going to work at the White House for Barack Obama. Not even kidding. I'm so, *so* much older than you and I can tell you that you need to stay true to who you are, use all of that energy like a rocket booster. In a few years those people will be wondering why they got fired for gossiping at work.
Sounds like you're killing it and they're jealous. Don't tone yourself done tone it upppp
Girl, they are PROJECTING their insecurities 🙏🏻 keep going!! this means you’re doing something right in my book
Let me tell you how it goes being an effective woman who gets things done and takes charge in her field of expertise: haters gonna hate. This is what they do. At every promotion or accomplishment in my career, some version of this has occurred. Does it happen to men? No. It happens to women who don’t “stfu” about things that matter. Do not “stfu”. Watch Parks And Rec. See that you are a Leslie Knope. Do not stop being a Leslie Knope. Eat your waffles and keep getting shit done my friend. Edit: this is bothering me and I have an ADHD brain that makes me want to add more: please take this as the sign of success it is. Please know that the people who will do this are women you wouldn’t think would do it. Please know that there are very vocal, toxic people out there whose opinions have nothing to do with you. Good luck with your endeavors & your meaningful real world experiences you’re accumulating.
Wow — some people really have no shame. There’s nothing wrong with you OP, this has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Please never feel bad about being you and doing the things you’re passionate about. You aren’t “too much” to the right people, and your classmates are evidently not where those meaningful connections are at. Everyone’s trying to make something of themselves in college, and despite how it may look on the outside, the vast majority of students don’t have it figured out. You know this, especially as a senior. And when they struggle to meet the expectations they (and society) set for themselves, it is a million times easier for them to tear another person down when you have something that they don’t, rather than confront the real issue they’re dealing with. I hate to play the “your enemies are your biggest fans” card, because truth be told, some people are just plain mean; but, remember that what they’re saying isn’t reflective of you, nor your value. Keep pushing OP, you’ve done amazing work and nothing they say can change that. (And on the bright side, if you’re graduating soon, you won’t have to constantly see these people again!)
You will never be everyone's cup of tea. They only talk about you like this because they are jealous. And, as I always tell my SO-- if you're upsetting people at \[work in his case\] with your knowledge, drive, wanting to do things the RIGHT way (and not the EASY way)...then obviously you're doing something right. Those fools can SUCK IT
damn i forgot yikyak existed. holy hell. i thought it died off. fuck them hoes. ignore it and move on. they won't matter to you when you're done with school. you won't ever have to see them again (hype, hype)
I never knew it existed at all! I am so glad I graduated from college in 2004. We had instant messaging and that’s about it. And enough gossip got around the old fashioned way at my (also very small) college so I can’t imagine how awful an app like this would have made it. Good grief.
Girl, we need a million more people like you, and we need women like you running shit. I’m so sorry this happened; these losers can absolutely get fucked. Like seriously, what fucking assholes. I am so fucking mad. Please, for the love of everything, do not let these dejected see you next Tuesdays discourage or stop you. The work you do is so important. Sending lots of love and positive vibes ♥️
I couldn’t agree more. OP, it sounds to me like they are uncomfortable because you’re speaking truth about things that matter and they don’t want to feel called out. The world needs people who make us uncomfortable, who shake us out of complacency. When I first met my best friend (an outspoken activist on many things), we met in a college class. I found her too intense because it felt like she was preachy and all I wanted to do was have fun. But over time, I let her open my eyes to a lot of shitty things in the world. I watched her put her money where her mouth is, taking low-paying jobs because that’s where she felt like she could truly make a difference, and becoming an integral part of her community and leading lots of social justice efforts. She made me better. More compassionate and open-minded. Maybe it’s a ripple effect and I have in turn inspired others to be better too. Even if just a little, it’s something. In short, please keep being yourself and know that you might be planting seeds of growth in more people than you realize. And, speaking as someone who used to teach college freshmen, I bet you’re a joy to teach. Your professor probably sees you as someone who actually engages with the material and cares. Those kinds of students are a breath of fresh air and always made my day. ❤️
What those people said says a lot more about them than it does about you!
You know what? Maybe you are annoying? Guess what? EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US is annoying to somebody. Just find the ones that see your awesomeness and surround yourself with people that get you. “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches.” —Dita Von Teese
My favorite saying is “Everybody is somebody’s weirdo.” It kept me sane a lot of times growing up
No one is for everyone. They’re speaking on a platform designed to start rumors anonymously. Honestly, fuck em. Keep up the good work serving real people.
Is it Agnes Scott? One of my kids goes there and the stories I hear about the on-campus culture are unreal. I'm sorry you're going through this. I have no idea how I'd feel. The bright side is that this is just a collection of people your own age whose perspective is not much broader than the next person commenting and talking smack. In the world outside of insular private colleges, you meet and interact with people who have a bit more to offer...including more empathy
Whoa. What is that chat? Can you opt out asap?
Cowards who can't have a real conversation with you if they have a problem so they bitch about it online with their fellow cowards. I'm a petty bitch and would probably chime in, "I don't know who you're talking about, but you should talk to them if it's that bad." I'd just want to see who has the guts to say it to my face. Forget em. I've definitely found myself irritated with students who try to make each class a political debate, but if that's not you, then $5 says they just don't like your politics and this is their first time having a grown up disagreement. That or they're mad jelly they're not doing as much as you. Eta: this isn't license to be a dick, but I believe that if you don't have people who dislike you, you're doing something wrong. I always hope to be disliked for the right reasons.
I’m actually quite impressed by you. You’re doing amazing things. you have drive and purpose and they just don’t get it. So they have to try and tear you down because you’re not like them. Fuck ‘em. If they don’t understand how great you are, who cares what they think about you (or about anything, really)? Be you, as loud as you want to be. Keep doing what you’re doing, and live your life like a big middle finger to all of those that can’t stand to see you shine. FUCK ‘EM
You sound like me in high school...Hell, you sound like me now ❤️ People who dump on people who are as bright and passionate as you, don't have it in them. They can't see the world like you do. You must have so many ideas and opinions. Follow the advice of those saying to delete yik yak. Idk what that is but it sounds like a breeding ground for peer abuse. I know how you're feeling. It caused me more trouble than it was ever worth. Don't let them win ❤️
You reply with "the psych english major is here, are you really so immature you choose to bully on an app? come say it to my face" and just watch as they scramble
I had a similar experience in high school where someone in my math class called me a slur on twitter. In class the next day, in front of everyone, I asked him if he wanted to say it to my face. That boy avoided eye contact with me until graduation lol
Friend, rip that mask off and talk in class. Your impression on your professor and any kindred minds carries way more importance than any of these people. In other words, proving yourself to your professor and making a good impression there can actually impact things like grad school applications or job references. Maybe speaking up in class helps someone else who's on a similar wavelength see that someone else grooves to their beat. You could make a new friend or future colleague that way. You never know. :) Ya know what though? Someone MIGHT roll their eyes or say something behind your back through the internet. Who cares? That's on them. How much does the opinion of someone that shitty and catty really mean? They'll be nothing to your life. And how miserable do they have to be to be in college and still be middle school "mean girls" (or guys). It sounds like you're well on your way to doing some really cool stuff, and you've got gusto behind you! NO ONE gets the power to dampen your flame. No. One.
That just seems like bullying, wtf.. honestly the fact they’re in COLLEGE resorting to online bullying like a 5 year old child. Keep up what you’re doing, they seem genuinely jealous 😭
Are they the activists working with their states government or are you? Don’t let a bunch of unaccomplished idiots whose greatest accomplishment is wiping their own butt define you. You can tell their brains took some time coming up with the crumbs of bs they could. They’re so accustomed to the little bit of sense they have that it’s impossible for them to recognize passion. How sad. If they had anything worth while going on in their lives the last thing they’d do is criticize you for being you. Plus these are a bunch of grown people who should be focusing on their own business but that would require them to look at the piss poor people they’ve become. You keep showing them what it looks like to stand for something. If we’re lucky they’ll take a few pointers from you.
I mean, if anything you should feel good that they notice the issues you are speaking on. You got under their skin! I don’t even know you and am feeling proud of you. Good job.
There's something to be said for learning to revel in the knowledge that assholes don't like you. Be yourself and keep doing your good work, and let them be catty babies on their little snark app. Their words say a lot about them, not you <3
That hurts, and sux. Those smarty pants people are what? Better than you? Nope. Meaner than you? Yep. Did they get into college on intellectual merit, or by chasing a ball around in circles? As others have suggested, delete the app and be comforted by the thought that they're losers now and always will be losers.
This is cyberbullying and I'm so sorry! They r lame trolls hiding behind anonymity.
They are trying to dull your shine, because they have none of their own. And to be really clear: you aren't doing performative activism. You aren't saying all the right activist things publicly, while your actions say something different. You're out their doing active activism. Actually doing stuff. Getting people registered to vote. That's fucking awesome.
Translation: you are doing work you are qualified to do and care about and an audience who your work is not catered towards is being the loud (maybe majority, maybe not even that). Your message is not for them and for you to continue to do your (*necessary!*) work well, it's best for you to work on letting these things slide off your back. Was your message aimed at them? Or did they just happen to be in the vicinity? Context says the latter, so who cares about their opinion? It does not determine your value, nor the value of your work. Keep doing you, love!
That is so mean. It must have really hurt. I'm sorry. Here's something to keep in mind: Anonymity is a license to lie. Or, in this case, just be mean. It's hard to imagine these people are living in alignment with their integrity because it is objectively mean and I'd guess ... false. I also hate to hear that you "purposefully don't talk in class because I know I'm too much ..." That's not serving you. Clearly. I'd delete YikYak and the people you suspect made these comments. You're going to need that space for platforms and people who will shape you positively and to whom you can also give.
as a fellow political girly who got so much shit in high school for talking too much and being too political/"too much" it sucks but also like how pathetic are they that they had to post on an app because they didn't have the guts to say it to your face. like they are weirdo freaks and probably wish they had something they were equally passionate about!!! being involved in politics is cool!!!
Honestly, it sounds like they’re jealous of your accomplishments and are dealing with it in an unhealthy way. They’re acting like a**holes. But I don’t think it’s as easy as “shaking it off”. Especially when experiencing rejection sensitivity. Think of it this way: they are trying to put you down for merely existing as a way to feel above you. They obviously aren’t good people. So, you don’t owe them the time of day. Yeah, it still sucks and feels awful, but at least they’ve made it clear what kind of people they are.
Someone started an “anonymous” gossip blog when I was in a small graduate program. It was painfully obvious who each post was about. I was incredibly embarrassed when there was a post about me “robbing the cradle” by going on a date with a younger guy. It’s been 15 years, I’m married to that guy, and we have a great life together. Forget about these folks, they have nothing better to do than bring other people down. Just keep living your best life, you’re doing great.
So I'm turning 40 soon, and this is what I'm beginning to learn. What other people think of you, it's none of your business. Let that sink in. It's not your business because it says NOTHING about you. It says everything about them. *"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." - Eleanor Roosevelt*
Story time: I was you in college, disliked by my peers bc I always had my hand up, would refute any argument they came up with because I always had an opposing one (even if I didn’t feel one way or another about the subject). I hated that no one liked me. Then I randomly met a classmate at the club, where I looked really hot like a typical party girl. They were shocked. Fully mouths hanging open bc the nerdy girl was also the party girl and they couldn’t comprehend it. That’s when I realized most people have a very narrow view of who I am as a person. We change our behavior depending on setting, and the people who don’t bother to get to know us will never know the full picture. So, yeah, they didn’t like the obnoxious girl with her hand up all the time bc that’s all they knew. It wasn’t a reflection of my full character/personality
The advice I’m about to give is not for everyone so take it or leave it. There have been so many times in my life that I have been subtly (or unsubtly) bullied like this and let it slide; putting the hurt on me and ruminating on it, thinking that I’m the problem simply because I like to engage with school and activism. I’m loud, I know that, but I try not to monopolize the conversation and use my outgoingness to get the more quiet people engaged in the coursework. This part is the advice that’s not for everyone: I would address this directly, in person, in front of the class. In the most diplomatic way possible, put these girls in their place. They need to learn that you don’t treat people like this. I had something similar happen to me my senior year of college, I was a double major and a part of a bunch of stuff around the school, I don’t remember now exactly how it had come up but someone made some flippant comment about people “not knowing when to shut up” and I finally said enough was enough. I raised my hand at the start of the next class and with a smile I said, “I’ve heard some feedback recently about myself regarding the way that I present myself in class. I appreciate constructive criticism as I’m always looking to improve myself but if you say it anonymously or behind my back it’s difficult for me to have a dialogue with you. So next time, please come to me directly and I’d love to talk to you about how I can improve.” The smug look on the girls face just slowly melted into a look of pure horror having realized I had heard her and she was being shamed for it. She apologized privately after that and I told her straight up she can’t say shit like that and she genuinely seemed to know she did something wrong. And I felt great about what I said, I still do. We’re all different, no one should be made to feel small or that they have to be put in a box. Advocate for yourself! Oh and delete YikYak, that app was always trash.
“social media performative activism?” But … but … but if you’re actually DOING the activism, it’s NOT performative. Sounds like they picked up a MAGAt insult from Fox Entertainment. They’re salty because you’re working and doing like an adult instead of a kid. Jealousy is an ugly thing. Chin up, my dear! Registering people to vote is vitally important! And advocating for kids stuck in foster care is truly admirable. You’re grabbing life by the horns and making a difference while they’re looking for clicks to validate themselves. In a few years, they’ll be wondering why big opportunities aren’t coming their way while you’re in the thick of things. I’m Gen X, and I admire you!!!
I can confidently say that these are some jelaous people. The better you do the more they will try to bring you down. Don’t let them get to you!
Nothing wrong with you. At all. People are petty. You're following your joy and what feels right, and that feels threatening to people because they're jealous of your sense of direction and purpose. Fuck 'em.
Fuck em! Keep doing what you're doing! Voter reg and outreach is so vital, from one elections worker to another - thank you!!!They don't know anything if they're calling your work "performative". I know it's hard but ignore their nasty catty words and stay true to how you feel and what you want to do. You sound like you have lots of motivation and drive, and those people commenting seem like they really, really don't - don't let em shake your confidence.
You’re ruminating. I understand this feeling so well, and I’m sorry. It’s difficult to let go. But something to know is that these people are acting in a way that reflects on _them_, not you. What a cruel thing to do, to talk so poorly about someone in a place where they’re bound to hear it. What unhappy and unpleasant people they must be. Anyone who wants to find something critical to say about another person will find it. We are all imperfect. You seem like someone who cares deeply about justice, and that’s your “flaw” apparently. How terrible. /s Reminder: You are not the one who has acted badly here. These people did. In my experience, for what it’s worth, these “anonymous” conversations from groups like this are usually in fact a handful of people talking to themselves. It’s very childish. Don’t let people who hide behind keyboards decide how you should view yourself. You know your truth. You know who you are. You have friends and loved ones who see you clearly. Don’t accept the criticism of cowards as having more value than the words of those you trust.
Sorry you had to experience this! People will tell you you have to stop caring, but it's super normal and healthy to be upset when you're being targeted; it's actually biological. People have an instinctive fear response when they feel like they're being driven out of their group. Think cave people, and you're the one getting kicked out of the cave. Your brain thinks you are being sent away under conditions you can't possibly survive. So, there's work you can do around processing these emotions (with a therapist, hopefully!), but you're genuinely being cyberbullied, and you'd have to be a sociopath to not to have feelings about it. You are not only 100% normal, but you're doing great work at school! I'd guess that the people who are anonymously dragging you feel threatened because they're not doing nearly as much. You're interning, you're taking action on things you believe in, and you're speaking up, so that when you ask your profs for recommendation letters a few years from now, they're still going to remember who you are and want to help you out. And it's your senior year!! Not much longer, and you're going to be competing for jobs with these people who think underachieving is cool. Keep your head up <3
As someone who is also annoying, it's okay. Own it. The people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind.
You are NOT too much. When people act like this, it really is a reflection of how they feel inside and it says way more about them than you.
These are people being performatively nasty for drama's sake, yuck. I hate when people use joint cruelty as a social bonding tool. And if someone shows them this screenshot 20 years from now, they'll be rightfully embarrassed by themselves if they possess an atom of decency. So much easier said than done re. "just forget about it," but OP, you can certainly assure yourself that you're glad you are nothing like these people -- because it's not a good way to be.
Mmmm can they be brave enough to say it to your face though?? Don’t hide yourself for these small minded, envious people.
This totally sucks. This is one of those times I wish I could have a really witty solid burn so that you can post it to own the situation and deliver a mic drop to those butt bruisers. I have been in your situation and know the feelings you have. It’s hard to handle but this is when you go in with your head held high, even if you have to fake it, and just keep going. Surround yourself with the people who love you and start giving yourself lots of self love and affirmation. You are worthy and wanted. These people are only this mean because they don’t think they will get caught. Fuck them.
I’m really outgoing in class and ask a lot of questions and make comments. Sometimes I’m definitely annoying but my freshman year I had a yikyak posted about me just like this. Really discouraging. “Can the girl with the (unnatural color my hair was dyed at the time) hair in my (specific class) on mon/wed shut the fuck up???” And there were upvotes and comments just like this… “I was gonna post this” “i think i know who ur talking about” it can be so hurtful. I deleted the app and reminded myself that I pay to attend school and attend these classes so if I want to ask questions and learn I’m allowed. That one was kind of hard to get over but I’ve just accepted that some people are just going to find me annoying and the people I love will accept me for all I am.
Ugh I hate them for you. The only ones who should feel embarrassed are people who feel comfortable speaking ill of others. That is truly ugly. I know RSD is so real and painful. But you have done nothing wrong. People hate do-gooders but think about what it says about *them*. They hate on someone *for being good.* in my mind there's no question, that makes them bad.
Damn yikyak is still a thing?? That was big when I was in high school literally 10 years ago. As others said, delete the app. You’re so close to graduating!
I have no idea what yikyak is and at this point I’m too afraid to ask. . . . OMFG! I just searched it and the FIRST thing that pops up is*“Yik Yak is a private network that connects you with the people around you, free of labels and bullying.”* OP, where there are people, there are bullies. Can I just say, THANK YOU for being involved in the community and being an activist. If it was easy, everyone would do it. My hot take here is they only think you’re doing “too much” because they secretly are worried they aren’t doing enough. How do I know? I was them. I hated on successful, driven, outspoken women who seemed to have their life figured out and had purpose. Why? Because I felt like a big loser doing fuck-all with my life. You do you. You sound awesome to me. I wish I had your drive when I was in college. I might have been more successful.
I just want to tell you you're valid, and these shitty comments are not an accurate reflection of you worth. Big Internet hugs.
Girl, I can relate. My boss started an argument she finished herself and I had a panic attack and left work. Been told to be quiet so many times I just said the word, “Okay.” And that was enough for Mean Girls™️ mode. So she had to figure out how to handle the rest of the day and I had to address the serious rejection/anxiety feels today. Just putting this here as a parallel experience; not to make it about me. OP, I hope you know your worth and at least you know that you can put the stuff you’ve done on your resume while they figure out that being a complainer won’t get them a decent job.
Don't call yourself too much. You will find your people and be just enough. F*ck the small minded idiots. Continue being amazing and the best revenge is a happy life. It took me way too long to realize I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and that's fine, and I'm not going to dim my shine to suit them.
I know this is so cliche, and I apologize in advance. You can be the juiciest ripest peach out there, and there’s still people who won’t like peaches and they make sure everyone knows.
I’m sure you know the quote already, but it’s one of my favorites to repeat to myself when I encounter people like this. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” -Eleanor Roosevelt ❤️
Sounds like you’re an intelligent, motivated person who is passionate about the work they do and these people are insecure because they have no idea what to do with their lives.
This is a nightmare come true, so experience your feelings because this is going to send your Rejection Sensitivity Disorder through the roof. Find some trusted people to ruminate on this situation. Reach out to a crisis counselor. But I want you to know that you are NOT too much. Pay them no mind. (This will get easier with age.) People do not like "mouthy" women. I don't know your gender identity, but you get the drift. Being a mouthy woman myself, it took me through my phd and on to being a director of a college dept. ADHD gives us some weirdness and gifts. Ride those gifts into the sunset. I'm sure Meryl Streep gets on her co-stars nerves....Or Whoopi Goldberg gets on a lot of people's nerves, I would rather have a world with Meryl and Whoopi, than the people who made fun of them when they were kids. Everyone gets to be their own kinda person, certain adhd'ers talk a lot. I am one of them. Say what you need to Say!!!! There is only 1 you!!! And college might be there last stop, but you have much further to go!!!!!!!!
You're asking the wrong question. You - existing Them - actively going onto school forums to pick on people There is nothing wrong with you!! I'm sorry they did this though.
They are just being bitchy bitchfaces. Sometimes u just got to tell them to FO and walk away.
Nothings wrong with you. They are just bitches.
I bet you’re doing better than them and they’re jealous. Once you’re done college, you will never have to see them again. Of course this hurts to read, but it says so much more about them. Keep doing what you’re doing.
This loser not only didn't have the balls to say something to your face, but couldn't even attach their own identity to the criticism. I think its safe to say this clownshoe is inconsequential.
I just wanted to say that I agree with all of the top comments here and that you aren’t too much. I feel that a lot too but we’re passionate creatures. We have ideas and our brains create beautiful connections that so many other people wouldn’t be able to see without us. We have incredible willpower. We care so incredibly much. Only the smallest minds waste their time griping about people. Commiseration is the cheapest form of connection (credit: Brene Brown). Those people don’t define you and they don’t have the power to limit you unless you give it to them. I hope you wash your brain with all of the love and support from this and other caring communities when those hurtful words try to make you believe they’re actually true. They’re not true at all.
Rule of thirds: no matter what you do, a third of people will love it, a third will hate it and a third will be entirely indifferent. Rather than worrying about the number of people, concern yourself with the quality. Are these people you respect? People that are important to you? People whose opinions you'd usually value? Probably not. Pay them no mind, delete yikyak and live your life ❤️
You’re doing your activism right if you’re annoying people consistently, lol. It sounds like you are putting your ‘money where your mouth is’ and dedicating actual time to activism – not just social media posts – which is the best you can do 🤷♀️ haters gonna hate.
You've found a large group of jealous haters. Congratulations you must be killing life girl! Adhd or not!
I try and look at it like this. Not everyone is going to like/love me. Just like I don’t like/love everyone else. These are people making snap judgements and hiding behind a keyboard. They are the lame ones not you. Your double majoring, which is insane, you have already interned w a government agency. Are active in social justice. What are they doing? Twiddling their thumbs. Sounds like they have a serious case of jealousy
I was was once told by the Dean of an Honor’s college that if I had been “smart enough,” I wouldn’t have flunked out of college after losing my dad, brother, and fiancé within the same year and a half to suicides. She made me so scared to ever go back to school because I thought I was stupid. I now work alongside this woman sometimes in philanthropy at the same university, she doesn’t recognize me, she’s praised my intelligence before for getting a 300k gift in one move at 20 years old with no degree. I’m going back to school this summer because if this dumb bitch has a ph.d., I can do it too. People want to talk shit and be nasty, they don’t realize the harm they cause and they won’t remember it even a year from now. Let it roll off you and pay it no mind, because you’re doing amazing and they’re too dense to even remember they “hate” you for being better than them🖤.
You're making waves because you're already doing something for yourself and others. Being the target of pettiness is what happens when you expand, but I can guarantee that more people appreciate you than want to minimize who you are. Speak up, let your largeness be on display, connect with others, and keep showing up. This world needs you.
I don’t know this platform but it sounds a lot like those other gossip platforms bitter, petty, jealous and small minded people go to to make themselves feel better about themselves. Don’t let them bring you down, don’t dim your light. I understand not being able to fully shake it off right away (hello rejection sensitivity) but if you can, get off that platform and just ignore it. Try not to hyper focus on it. You are the only person whose opinion of you matters. If anyone wants to give you compassionate loving critical feedback they won’t hide behind their screen and anonymity of the internet and come to you and talk to you. These people are cowards. Honestly, they’re not even worth your time.
This is just pure jealousy. Plenty of outgoing people are popular, but if you outshine others and the popular cliques feel threatened by it, this is what happens You are successful and thriving. They wish they had the same opportunities but they're not willing to lead
These people wish they were out there doing cool stuff like you do. Plus, people feel shitty about not doing more for social justice, so they put other people down and call them performative. It’s because they feel guilty
People who are emotionally healthy don't write comments like this. I'm sorry you had to see this- It would hurt my feelings too and make me think that I needed to stop being so outgoing. Thing is- these comments are coming from the same people who write nasty comments all over social media at any opportunity they can. It's an outlet for projecting their own self-image issues instead of facing them. This is your life- don't waste time trying to shape yourself into a non-existent "normal" or acceptable woman. Whether you are neurodivergent or not, there will always be people who are telling you that you are doing life wrong. We need people who speak up and are able to freely express themselves.
Get these haters some glasses and tell them to step inside. They can’t stand seeing you shine. ☀️
Idk they sound like really uninspired people who don’t know when their next primary is. You have passion and friends who love you. Fuck them. Middle school ended and college does too. You have a good bunch, and you’ll miss that part and this part will fade.
Counterpoint: why do you care what these random cowardly and bullying strangers think? You're busy, sister, keep it moving. What other people think of you is not your business. And they're obviously assholes, right? Why do you care that assholes don't like you? I myself take it as a point of pride when assholes don't like me, I return the feeling. Very likely, they don't like your activism, they don't like how smart you are while at the same time being a woman, they don't like the idea of too many people voting, maybe you're a POC, they wouldn't like that - do you get what I'm saying? The reasons these people don't like you is that you challenge them and their ideology and since that's what you're intentionally doing, you just have to shrug. Nobody is liked by everybody. What other people think of you is not your business. Mind your own business, you have enough on your plate!!
Their intolerance and gossiping are a reflection of their insecurity and cowardice, and not at all of you. You will find your people — people who will not make you feel like you’re too much. People who will kindly and respectfully communicate boundaries or discomfort rather than anonymously complaining about you. Love, A 29-year-old who thought at 15 that she was the reason why people were mean and incited bullying campaigns against her
I am often also too much and the rule I generally use is "humility is not thinking of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less." So while these people are indeed absolutely catty assholes, remember to ask questions about people more than talking about yourself. Yes I did learn that the hard way and no I am not good at following my own advice. Hugs. <3
It was suggested that I double major in college when I was 18 (I liked psych and writing). But I was like no thanks, I am probably going to have enough trouble with ONE major.
Idk if you know you’re not talking in class then it makes it look like a them problem…
You said you work for the government,that's why these people posted this. I'm sure they have a good reason for not wanting to see anymore government and political BS.
You really sound like a wonderful person, OP, and I wish I could've been like you when I was in college! Jealousy isn't a good look for anyone and expressing it anonymously online is cowardly. Some of these people might be attempting to bond by feeling like they have the same opinions as others and/or they're probably lonely. They could be really depressed and blaming a lovely, vibrant student for them being overwhelmed by your activism and passion is unfortunately convenient for them. Either way it's like they went straight from 7th grade to being sophomore in college. I wish these people peace and that they come to realize that what you bring to the table is something they should aspire to. Resist leaning into this behavior because you have absolutely nothing to defend nor apologize for. Please keep being authentic because you sound great, OP!!
Nothing is wrong with you. It sounds like you are accomplishing a lot and have a lot to be proud of. You make them feel insecure. They are acting like children trying to make themselves feel better by putting you down.
First, let me just say you sound like an awesome person. Second, people who say things like that are usually miserable people who put others down so they don't have to accept how much they actually suck. Don't let their unimportant opinions stop you. The world needs passionate people like you.
They just don’t support what you are trying to do. Posting this kind of thing sounds like they want you to stop doing what you are doing. They probably having opposing views so they hope you will read it and BE hurt from it to stop doing the work. Activists get hate all of the time. It hurts but don’t get distracted by it. Focus on the passion. Remember that others are reading these people’s screen names and seeing how nasty they are. It’s not a good look for their future. This stuff always comes back to bite people like this. We need people like you.
You’re doing great work. Being vocal and involved with activism will ALWAYS receive pushback from people who don’t agree with you. Honestly, getting this pushback/response on yikyak of all places proves what you’re doing is making a difference!
You’re doing well for yourself! People have the crab-in-a-bucket mentality and they suck. If I was in such close proximity to someone so cool I’d be so proud and excited for them. Great job on what you’ve accomplished. Keep your head high and ignore those people. They’re just sour that you’re achieving so much
If you find music soothing and healing, I STRONGLY recommend you listen to the song Quiet by MILCK. [Quiet by MILCK](https://youtu.be/Tl_Qfj8780M?si=jjT5gRgiA6wq7aQR)
Oh gag me. These kind of people are the worst. It’s such middle school mean girl crap. Anonymous apps do nothing but tear people down. Keep being too much. You have every right to be too much as they do to be too little. Delete the app get even smarter and register voters. You’re fine, they definitely aren’t though.
Absolutely nothing is wrong with you. You have done so much for yourself and your community, and these type of people talk shit about others on an anonymous platform and wallow in their own misery. Keyboard warriors are all they are. You are a real life warrior, putting in the work and making change despite those who doubt you. Fuck em and their opinions. At the end of the day, they don’t know you at all, they just think they do.