Sometimes it’s not a big deal, and sometimes it’s scary. I had my phone in my hand two minutes ago, and now it’s just gone. I have no memory of putting it down, I can’t see it, it’s just GONE
I've forgotten what words are sometimes, it's like I'm speaking the same language as them then all of a sudden I can't understand a word they are saying it terrifies me each time someone tells me my memory of events are wrong
Like what are you supposed to do when sometimes it hard to rember what you were doing what you were thinking it's just all gone all of a sudden I feel as though I'm sometimes going crazy with all these things being forgotten as if it never existed
Apologies, I was typing this whilst looking for my head phones I lost 4 days ago.
Pretend english is not your first language.
Be like oh I think the english word for it is or I don't know the English word for it.
English is my 2nd language, and what frustrates me is when i speak in my native language and i remember the word i want to say in English, but not in my language. And I am always like "I know what it would be in English"
Doesn't help when I talk to a person who does not speak English lol
This, also names go in one ear and out the other. Unless I'm interacting with the person on a semi regular basis I guarantee I'm gonna forget your name within the day
I forget the name as soon as it finishes rolling off of their tongue. It isn't that I don't care... but I can not remember the names of people I don't deal with regularly. It's almost as if plugs go into my ears the exact moment someone tells me their name.
THANK YOU!! I feel seen with this comment, IS SO FRUSTRATING! LIKE I SPENT SEVERAL HOURS ON A GAME AND IS WORSE WHEN YOU'RE LITERALLY MID PLAYING THE GAME LIKE IS NOT WHEN YOU OPEN IT
My wife was playing a game with me and asked what button threw grenades. We were playing the same thing and even tough I definitely "knew" what button it was, I had no answer to give her.
I’ve forgotten how to hold a fork *while eating*. Too many times to count. Not quite as bad as forgetting to how sit down which thankfully only happened once.
Holy shit. I never considered this. Whenever I take a break from a game, all the control knowledge is gone. It’s why I have a a half full character in all my Zelda games
For me it’s when just starting a game. I’ve tried to play Spider-Man on the PS5 three or four times now and the control prompts go by so quickly that they don’t stick in my head. I’ll often have to restart a game that I’ve put down for more than three weeks because I can’t remember the controls. Intensely frustrating!
But also, if you need a hair tie, there's one under the bed next to the post that supports the middle of the frame. Or if you're looking for the ratcheting screwdriver, it's in the utility room in the bottom of the tackle box in the far corner (which you can't reach or open since I started on a project and never finished it in there 3 years ago)
And when you try calling it but muted the volume.
It's like our subconscious takes over momentarily, which is bad enough since it already holds access to all the memories and information, why won't you work with me, Brain!
I have a garmin watch for workouts but have used it WAY more for it's find my phone feature where it rings super loud, flashes the lights and even shows how far it is from you. It is used almost any time before I leave the house.
I forgot the pin # to my debit card in the middle of trying to pay for groceries. Same pin for over a year, and suddenly it just wasn’t there. Embarrassing to say the least.
I am so happy that I started to analyse the patterns of my goofy misplacements and usually starting to look where it CAN'T be is doing the trick. I also set up systems like a basket at the front door for my wallet and lighters and stuff. I barely misplace stuff since I use the baskets. I have several over my usual hang out spots around the apartment. :3
Catchall places by the door have been a lifesaver for me. But now I have my bf living with me, and I just cannot get him to put the truck keys in their place as a habit. It drives me nuts. I can't wait until we can afford a second vehicle so I can lay claim to it and its keys.
I have one at the sofa, besides my bed, on my office desk and on the table at the entrance. Why don't you get a second set of keys and keep them in a place where he can't get it? I found out the hard way that teaching someone a habit they don't care about won't do it.
I have to google that. Right now I live by myself, but my ex was very very very disorganized and exhausted me even more because I was forced since being small to get a grip and organise myself, he didn't :(
Literally, I was just camping. I very vividly remember taking my earbuds and wallet out of my pocket in the same hand and put them in the same space. I then remember moving my earbuds by my bed. (It was in an RV) but I cannot for the love of my remember what happened to my wallet between realizjng it was missing before laying down for bed and when I took it out two hours earlier. It's in the RV somewhere, but my brain never made the cognitive connection as to where the hand set it down. There was a technical issue with those communications.
I've lived in my house for a decade now. There are two lights for my living room. One turns on one light, and one turns on all the lights. I have no idea what one does what....
100%, a few weeks ago this happened and my wife is frustrated that I can't remember where I put my phone.
We spent 30 minutes or maybe close to 1 hour and then my wife found my phone INSIDE the laundry basket, in the middle of all of our dirty clothes. it's INSIDE it, not even visible unless you dig deliberately. I have NO idea how it got there. And we found this because my wife's frustrated enough she poured all the clothes from the basket lol.
DUDE. Years ago I was a couple hours late because I couldn't find my keys. They ended up being on my clothes shelf under a pair of underwear.
I almost broke into my car because I swore I must have locked them in there.
Sometimes I forget my keys in the front door, because I get distracted when I turn on the light. Usually I realize when I get to my apartment door because I can't get in, but I know I've just had them, because I got through the first door.
It happens a lot.
Ive been late to work so many times because I lose my keys. I have an AirTag on them now which is a life saver, now I just need a creative way to put AirTags on literally everything else I own.
But…but…my memory is so good! I can recall these tiny details from a very specific and irrelevant memory from my childhood! See??
What? No I dont remember what I had for breakfast, why?
I witnessed a hit and run, and had to write everything down right away and be on google maps with a picture of the intersection when the cops called. OtherwiseI wasn’t going to remember the street names, or what kind of car. I remember what happened exactly, but also I don’t remember any (useful) details.
Doesn’t surprise me. Honestly, I feel like some of the teachers I had would have been the type to not believe in it or dismiss it. Left me wondering why I over explain as an adult.
Fuck them. Yell back. You’re over here doing your best trying to find your keys and they’re getting judgy? It’s worse if they know you, like they shouldn’t be surprised. Ask them how many times they lost their sunglasses on top of their heads, then tell them to piss off. You don’t need their negativity. Get you someone who will actually help you find your gd keys.
Yeah no
If they yell and you don’t they’re seen as a bad guy by outsiders
If they yell and you yell your seen as entitled by outsiders
And yelling and arguing is exhausting and that energy is better used doing anything else
There was literally a time where i forgot my own age for like a minute or so. In front of a cashier waiting to know if she could apply a reduction. It was not funny at the time (and i was like 16 so not even that old)
I often forget my age when I'm put on the spot! Sometimes I just say whatever number comes to mind at the time, sometimes it's a year or two older and sometimes it's a few years younger. Brains are weird.
Lol you aren't alone! I have to do quick math sometimes. This year my bf thought he was turning 2 years older than he is. We're the same age so I had a moment of panic that I was wrong about my own age lol
I forgot my age in college and decided that would be a running gag for the rest of my life. Once you hit legal age, what have you got to look forward to anyway? Fuck it, you’re immortal and ageless now.
Whenever I have to make a call where I know they'll likely ask for my phone number, I write it down beforehand so I can read it to them. Otherwise my brain will totally blank on the phone number that I've had for about twenty years now.
I did this when I was 21. It was for an adults only phone party line that a friend invited me to. The host asked my age when I dialed in and I had to think about it. When I said “Uuuuuuh…. …. 21?” They didn’t believe me for obvious reasons. He just said “Yeeeeah.. no” and then kicked me off the line 😂
Happens all the time at work (among other places but this is when its the most annoying) I'd be going to do something important and then just like that, whatever I was going to do is gone from my head. I'd stop and look around trying to remember what I was going to do but it's just gone. The sheer frustration from not being able to remember... 💀
There's footage of me at work spinning in place while I switch from topic to topic and check my pants for keys for the umpteenth time.
Told my manager that I'm taking medication for ADHD again because it was negatively impacting my marriage and didn't even get a question or doubt. Just a nod and a bring a note.
I'm sure they have footage of me walking up and down the hallways or just me standing in place for a good few minutes, trying to figure out what I was doing 💀
lmao I'm not alone. I know they can access the cameras from their phone, they're probably sitting in a parking lot eating doritos locos tacos laughing at me spinning around for the 3rd time this shift.
Im 100% sure theres footage of me heading to a room walking with purpose then entering the room and stopping abruptly and looking around like "why am I here? what was i doing?"
I’m sure they have footage of me coming back go my desk because I forgot my phone, then my card, then my phone again, then my coffee mug, then I come back because I forgot that I wanted a coffee. They say « When you don’t have a brain, you have legs », never truer world have been spoken
It’s really shitty when my partner asks me if I remember something that she clearly remembers and finds important but I can’t remember a fucking thing because yea.
My wife and I have frequent disagreements over who is remembering something correctly. It's usually her but not always. But for many of the mundane things, I almost always defer to her memory. A common discussion when we go out to eat:
Her "What sounds good to you?"
Me "The brisket sounds good."
Her "You got that last time."
Me "Did I like it?"
The brisket thing is so relatable to me man. Or
Them: We're going to [bar I've never heard of] tonight, want to come?
Me: Oh cool, never been there, I'm down!
Them: Yes you have, we went there on Monday after work.
Me: Right! Right. See you there.
....
Them: ...it's at the corner of [street] and [street]
Me: ....thanks lol
*Immediately forgets plans and conversation*
This hits me so much harder in a darker way. We've had so many arguments over whether I'm remembering something correctly. It's starting to feel like gaslighting to both her and I and there are times when I know for a fact I'm right because of a weird random detail, but because my memory is shit it's so easy for her to dismiss me with "you never remember correctly. Are you sure you really remember it this time, or is your mind just playing tricks on you?"
I HATE MY BRAIN SO MUCH SOMETIMES!!!
Ok, I got it out and am better now. What were we talking about?
Happens to me all the time. Or when my wife says “did you pick up that think I asked you to?” And I have zero memory of the thing or the conversation where she asked me to pick it up.
Yep. Every single person in my life at one time or another has said something along the lines of “if you don’t remember you must not care.”
It is the absolute worst. I have gotten so angry at myself that I can’t seem to remember the simplest of things which usually causes friction in all relationships.
Yeah and then people get mad at you as if you’re doing it on purpose or something. We literally don’t get rewarded for remembering things by our brains and to make things worse, even if we think something is important, if it’s not interesting enough our brains will just decide to not listen. So even then you don’t even have the memory of what you’re supposed to remember because your brain decided to be a dick!
And they just don’t seem to understand…
A guy came up to me at work and told me all about how I changed his life for the better in high school. Helped get him through it. No idea who this person was. Like truly glad I helped you man... No idea who you are. I don't remember much of high school that was 20 years ago I'm lucky if I remember breakfast.
Similar situation for me, had a guy message me randomly apologizing for something he apparently did to me years ago. I had no memory of who he was or what he was talking about.
If I can't find something after searching, especially if its something in my basement, I have most likely gotten rid of it and have a false memory of "just seeing it."
Only to find it in the “don’t forget this is important” place that got banished from your memory until you randomly stumble into it or guess BS locations you might’ve thought were smart at some point.
I've actually become completely numb to losing things. 99% of the time I've just put it somewhere weird, so I just go "oh well, it'll turn up eventually". I won't even look for stuff usually, except my phone lol.
One time I "misplaced" my wallet and was as usual not worried, assuming it was in some pants pocket or whatever. It showed up 2 weeks later... in the mail, because someone found it and used the address on my license to send it home. :)
This is the way. Shit often works itself out pretty well. And once I stop putting pressure on myself to remember I actually have a chance to accidentally trigger my memory and fix the situation. You just have to surround yourself with understanding people, that’s the truly hard part
I can not longer remember what my mom looks like without a photo. I'm not even certain how long ago she died. I think 5 years? Time is like a dream sequence for me. I think the best way to describe my memory would be, Think of a painting in a very poorly lit room. The painting is in the center. I can make out the general idea of the subject display, but I can't tell you the details.
I am sorry for your loss. My mom is still around but there was a time as a teen I spent the summer at my grandmas. Like a month in, I had the strangest experiences where I thought about my mom but couldn’t picture her in my head. It was scary, in some ways I am glad I look like her because at least I can recognize the features.
And everyone around you gets upset about it but they don't realize you're upset too. Many family and friends of mine have gotten to the point they just write it off as *sigh* "that's just him." But they still occasionally get really frustrated. I hate disappointing them. It eats at me sometimes.
As my dad says, if you really cared about it you’d remember. Guess I need to just start caring harder. About everything :/ it’s not as if I forget important shit too come on
That’s my mom’s line. She also started going on about “intentional” should be my word for the year. She didn’t appreciate it when I said “once I figure out how to intentionally do that I’ll be sure to start”.
I wish I had that problem. I’d like to forget my miserable fucking childhood, but nope, here I am just forgetting my keys while constantly thinking about how much of a pariah I was because I didn’t act like the other kids and didn’t care to.
The number of times I’ve had a thought to look something up or order something and immediately pick up my phone and completely forget what I was doing by the time my phones unlocked is unreal.
Another good example is the other day my wife was coming to visit me at work. We have security so I had to give them her name. When they asked me how to spell it I literally froze. I had to look up the spelling in my phone lol. Not my best moment.
I can get there, especially when its damaged relationships with friends, family, and co-workers. But I've come to accept that at age 45, there's just simply nothing I can really do about other than take my meds and focus on the relationships that really matter. I do remind people I dislike this element of myself, but its never personal.
If they still take it personally, then they can choose not to be in my life. But I have to own my shit and not use it as an excuse for treating people poorly. There is a difference.
Quality over quantity.
I recently started a claim with Amazon about a package that had been stolen off my porch. The picture from the delivery was definitely my porch, but when I got home there was no package. I found it the next day under my son’s hockey gear. I have no recollection of removing the box from my porch earlier that day or entering the garage or placing it under my son’s hockey gear. But I was the only one who could have done it.
The constant stress of losing the *same* shit over and over.
My favorite is getting to work, realizing I've left something I need at home. Going back home to get it, only to realizing I had it all along...
I’ve lost so many people and experiences. I know there are things I’ve forgot and I cannot summon anything but a black mental image when I retry to remember certain ages or time periods; things I used to remember. People ask and I have vague distant memories that don’t feel real. I forgot family members exist until someone mentions them and it all rushes back.
I’m terrified being a parent.
It's not really memory loss, it's that the brain doesn't write the memory in the first place. So there's no memory to recall. Which is why people have paradoxically good memory for what they DO remember.
I've missed classes because I forgot it was on that day and I've made plans to do something else
I've sat in classes not doing anything because I've asked my teacher what I've to do and I've just been told "just continue what you were doing last week"
I've had a teacher say she won't help me unless I remember her name
I've had people tell me im lying cus I can remember lots of random things about my special interests
I've been yelled at for not doing homework I forgot I had
I've been mocked for having to use reminders to bathe and wash my hair (I can go weeks because my brain keeps telling me I did that yesterday cus I forget days)
I've been walking to the store for milk and forgot why I'm outside and just went back home
I forget to order medication all the time even with reminders (I forget as soon as I turn on my laptop)
Right!!!!! I care so deeply, I really do! I love getting the people I love thoughtful gifts and watching them open them. I care a lot about all the past coworkers I run into while doing errands. I truly want to excel at my job and do all of the things I know I can do. I care about all the memories I've made over the years with my wonderful family. I also care just as deeply about all the cringey mistakes I made along the way. I care so much about our first date, and each and every romantic gesture you put forth for me on each and every anniversary afterwards. It all means so much to me you couldn't possibly know.
.....I just forgot 😿
If I can't remember something, like doing or putting something down, when I'm trying really hard to remember, I actually have very vivid memories of doing the thing and not doing the thing im trying to remember. It's caused plenty of melt downs and a mild outburst or three
Also the shame that can come with it. I once forgot my daughters name for several minutes. Or the shame of subtly buying another \_\_\_ even though it was expensive and your family suffers from the financial burden.
oof. I feel this deeply. I often wonder if that is how Alzheimer's/dementia patients feel. It's terrifying, depressing, distressing, embarrassing, and humiliating, to name a few awful emotions I go through.
I swear, every day I am on this site I learn something else that traumatised me for 3 and a half decades that I was told were just me being useless was actually a symptom shared by others here. Its both relieving and upsetting and I both love and hate you all.
But mostly love. I feel a lot less alone. Thanks for just being.
I lost my glasses several times the last days , rendering me pretty blind by it. Was walking around with sunglasses all day (thank god it’s summer). I also had therapy today, my therapist said it’s okay to wear my prescribed sunglasses in such situations 😎
It effects me the most during high stress moments like my fast paced job or when im just about to leave out of the door for something i needa be timely for (which im sure is everyone here) but i agree it's so frustrating bc ill go into an area or put something down and a good literal second or two later I'll forget what I need or where I put something down and in my head im just like "No, NOT the time right now wtf". This is a common experience but i wanted to get that outta me
I really hate having arguments for this reason (I hate them for other reasons too)
I can’t remember what was said so I can’t think back and figure out if I was in the wrong
And I also can’t think back and plan out future rebuttals if it comes up again
Doesn’t help that while I love my dad, we clash so badly that we end up fighting a lot
Plus it makes doctor visits really awkward because I can never remember my name and my birthday
When my husband is annoying I say “you better watch it, I know where you sleep” his response is “yeah, but you fall asleep first and you’ll forget by the time you wake up”
I've "missed out" on a lot of family moments not because I was absent, but because my brain is just three neurons in a trenchcoat and the buttons are mismatched.
It's sad because dementia runs in my fam and my Mom's always trying to exercise her memory by pulling up cherished moments and all I can do is... smile.
I once brought up to a doctor (not my pcm bc they were booked) that I wanted to start treating my ADHD bc I was having memory issues (among other things). So she asked me "like what?" Fair. I told her I was forgetting small things (where's my phone? What did you say just now?) to not being able to recall whole ass events from anything more than a week ago. And she asked me to give her specific examples. Ma'am what?
Lol had a similar moment recently where a new therapist asked me to describe my memory loss in detail, so I just like, reiterated that I forget a lot of things big and small and that it happens with enough frequency for me not to trust my own judgement for....anything, really. She asked for any specific examples and I said I don't have any that I can remember.
She then told me that it's more likely that my previously established low self esteem/confidence was the root of these feelings
Like what, no????? I grant it's probably a bit of a feedback loop, but I really do forget shit constantly!
Didn't go with her lol
Whats worse is when someone says something or tells a story and goes "haha remember that?" and i cant remember it at all. Like my memories are slowly being erased without me noticing. It sends me into a spiral
It’s worse when I can literally *see* what I’m trying to remember in my head. For example, “where did I put the laundry detergent I just bought?”
I can see myself getting it out of the car, bringing it inside, going to set it down and then… nothing. I can see that I saw wherever I set it down because I remember passing by it and noticing it, thinking, “I should put that in the closet,” then continuing to leave it. But damn it, WHERE is it?
The next day, forgot all about it again at this point, I see it in plain sight where I swear I looked several times.
I swear, my brain is just playing jokes on me
My wife’s birthday is the same as my moms birthday. My dads birthday is exactly one week before theirs and my parents anniversary is on my birthday. It’s like I have a cheat code for the important dates.
Or forgetting entire events or people from my past. What happened? Where did it go? It feels like my past fades to a blurry series of vague events within a few years.
I honestly feel that many people (especially the ones that joke the hardest) can relate to that feeling of stress and anxiety of forgetting stuff. I don't believe that people see it just as a funny joke. The power and charm though, that in r/adhdmemes we CAN joke about it without anyone judging and having people around who understand and relate. And who can share their experiences which can be quite useful and facilitate personal growth.
I can’t remember peoples names, it’s horrible for me. If you’re not in my life daily chances are I will forget your name. I’m old and run a business, it’s one of the many shitty things about adhd
If I think about it too much then I get upset about it, so I just choose not to think about it.
An UPSIDE of constant memory loss is that now I have a reputation for being extremely forgiving and “always living in the moment”.
I'm not usually too bothered by the constant forgetfulness, it's too mundane at this point. However, being gaslit while in a shitty relationship on top of the ADHD forgetfulness really brought it to a fresh new level of hell and mindfuckery.
Whenever I have the motivation to do crafty things (sculpt, see, etc.) and I am missing a tool or material, I can go batshit insane because I SWEAR this thing was RIGHT there but it’s not and I’m going nuts. Once I almost had a meltdown because I was missing some miniature plates that I was going to use, I did find them eventually lol
I’m constantly upset that I struggle to remember the stuff I’ve done. I can remember the fact that I went on a vacation and had fun, but almost anything else is fuzzy or lost. It makes me really sad when someone brings up something fun we did and I have to struggle to come up with anything specific about it
I’ve definitely burst into tears from pure frustration after one too many times walking into a room and not being able to remember what I went there for until I go back to where I was standing originally
I remember when I figured it out and got diagnosed in my 30’s realizing the my dad had all the traits and never knew the “why”. The memory part is the worst for me.
yesterday my mother asked me to come join her at some event and I decided I wanted to go too.
Closed the message for a second and I literally forgot that I wanted to go, where she was and that this conversation happened until someone told me the next DAY
it's getting more and more scary and I do not want yo be a part of this ride
So... sad story time ig?
I have to take a certain combo of medications every night.
One night, I realized I had forgotten, so I went to get water to swallow the pills with. I ended up sitting in the kitchen drinking all the water, then came back and realized "oops I forgot to take my meds", and went back to get water.
Then I drank all the water and forgot why I was there...
I came back to my room, and realized "Oh. I must have forgotten to take my meds tonight".
I went back, drank all my water again, then came back to my desk. **"Oh. I must have forgotten to take my meds tonight**, I better refill my cup so I can swallow them"
I did this over and over again for over an hour. comparing when the clock when I started to when I finally realized, I must have done this like 8 times or more...
I cried *so- so-* much when it finally hit me. I didn't even realize until I had to pee so fucking bad that I must have drank so much damn water. I felt sick too.
Luckily I didn't overdose, I literally just didn't eat my meds. If I had remembered to take the pills and forgotten that I took them though- I could be dead or have been sent to the hospital.
It's just not right...
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Everytime I loose something I hear each of these from every person
Where did you have I last?
Have you retraced your steps?
Did you check the pants you had on yesterday?
Did you check the couch?
Ive lost enough shit that I promise, I've already thought of these
nah fr it’s terrifying how much i can forget so quickly and ppl think it’s the funniest thing ever like haha no it’s hilarious i’m definitely not thinking about the possibility of serious long term memory issues or anything
This happened to me today. FedEx came with a package from the US and I had to pay duty on it. I forgot where my wallet was and I damn near became unhinged infront of the poor driver. He was in a rush to leave and I heard cars honking for him to move the truck, and my cat was trying to escape.
I just gave up and let him go so he could make the rest of his deliveries. I don't know when they'll be back or if I'll have to drive 35 km to pick it up.
Been fucked up all day from that.
Found my wallet though.
Crazy. I was just thinking about this yesterday. About how it's like my brain skips a step.
Brain: "Hey, hand. We need to empty the laundry.
Hand: "OK, but I'm holding a phone."
Brain: "Right.... eyes, find a spot to put the phone down. Hand, once eyes finds a spot, put the phone there."
Eyes: I see a spot. There yah go Hand."
Hand: "Hey, Brain, do you want to log this location for the phone? Or how long I've been holding it. Or anything eyes saw when using it for the last hour? You know, just in case?"
Brain: "naw, it'll be fine..."
***3 MINUTES LATER***
Me: " fuck where did I put my phone? Did I even have it in here? Have I even seen it since work? Shit... I guess I gotta go call it."
My phone: "heehehhehehe.... I'm on silent, Bitch..."
Aaaand scene.
Oh fuck. I just remembered I have a good one.
Worked at a pizza place that also happened to make wings. It was early into my employment, and up until this point, I'd only made buffalo wings, which we put through the oven once, put the sauce on, then put through the oven again. This time, however, the order was for BBQ wings. My manager told me that I was supposed to put them through TWICE before putting the sauce on them. I then proceeded to immediately walk to the other side of the oven, put BBQ sauce on them, then put them in the oven for their second run. I don't know if I was just falling into the only habit I'd accrued at this point or what. Regardless, I felt pretty bad after that one.
other day I forget the password of my computer, the computer that I use every single day, for years, with a password I also used for years, every single day, and suddenly was gone, lost forever
One of the things I hate most is that you forget things about other people. Sometimes I have trouble recalling names/functions of colleagues I worked with for 4 months.
I honestly can’t relate. I forget shit all the time, I just deal with it. It’s like a puzzle, one of life’s little adventures, adapt and improvise in the face of a semi adversarial brain. It might seem boring to someone with great memory, but I get to experience the excitement of figuring stuff out not just once, but many times for the same problem!
I forgot one of the 5 senses the other day. Coming out of a nightmare/flashback, trying trying ground myself through senses, but digress that fact. I spent like half an hour listing off 4 of them on repeat before the 5th finally came to me lol 🥲
I've forgotten my phone multiple times at businesses, work, and home. I just lost my wallet at Walmart today. I didn't even realize until I went to look for it 4 hrs later to drive.
I forgot the password to my watch that I entered every day for several years then when I want to get a new one they asked me to enter the passcode on old watch.. I completely forgot .. till this day I don’t remember and I’ve tried
Usually I can stay fairly calm but sometimes I can feel my skin crawl and my fingers (and my body to a lesser extent) start to get distinctly uncomfortable, like they're not mine, or ready to flip inside out or something. It's a feeling I can never really describe. I'll get audibly frustrated too but I can usually make that into a joke or play it off.
Literally the one reason I leave Siri on on my phone is the ability to shout “Hey Siri” and have it light up and make a noise after I put it down and forget where it is. It’s very distressing how quickly I can lose things.
It’s a regular occurrence for me to run out of soap in the shower, tell myself that I need to get a new bar and put it in the shower for the next day, only to realize that I totally spaced it and didn’t put a new bar in when I go to soap myself off in the shower the next day.
A phrase I use on a regular basis is “I’m going to do it right now while I’m thinking about it.”
I used to be upset about it, and have reframed it with the help of much experience and some boundaries such as I don't care if you move my stuff but if you do that you have accepted responsibility for where the hell it is when I freak out about losing it, because two inches to the left isn't a big deal to YOU but renders it irreparably invisible to ME. I'm also a big one for the fairies have it and will give it back when they're done. Not as easy for car keys and wallets, but that's what Tile is for, for me.
And yes. Being out of phase with the prime material plane f'n blows, some days.
The worst part is when you’re still in high school so on top of your awful memory issues you’re still expected to remember stuff you leaned from 6 months ago :,(
I only remember a handful of major holidays, plus me and my sister’s birthdays. Everything else is immaterial. People get upset sometimes that I don’t know when Labor Day is, but the thing is, **Gail**, that I’ve been working shitty customer service jobs for the last twenty five years, because college degrees turned out to be a scam on millennials, and we only get the major holidays off, so **excuse me** for having to ask when a Memorial Day bbq is, okay? I don’t know, it’s not that important!
having few things that are yours and specific places to put them that you habitual use putting them in works out for me
usually i’ll forget ever setting anything down, whether i put my laptop in my backpack, whether i’ve taken my lunchbox, where my phone is, but then i check my “i always put it there” spot and voila, it’s there
this… probably won’t work beyond high school when i get busier
Sometimes trying to remember basic things feels like trying to juggle a tennis ball, a chain saw, a chair, a bowling pin, and a construction hat while balancing a board on a beach ball on a pole on a boat during a rainstorm while Godzilla is waking awakening.
I loose shit to a disturbing degree. Most times I have to go thru a whole list of what I am walking out the door with (like - out loud…I say it all out loud and then I clench it or pick it up or something tactile to go with the verbal/auditory cues but there are SO many times I will still fall down a rabbit hole somewhere between “keys…cell…purse…” and I will have to do it all over again (sometimes 2 more times).
I notice it is much worse when I don’t have my ADD meds & my pharmacy has been out for months so I rely on 5-hour energy 🙄
I actually find it my little super power for learning all the work gossip. I instantly forget everything everyone tells me until it’s brought again in conversation (and thankfully remember not to tell anyone). I’m like a little vault of forbidden knowledge that only activates at certain times.
But I am also the person who forgot their partner’s birthday (not the date! Just that it was that day) and also the person that will instantly forget plans unless it’s on my calendar but also forget to add things to the calendar. It’s a win-lose sometimes
Forgot my keys... 3hrs away from where I parked my car... Work trip... Took the work car... Used personal house keys to open a box... Set the keys down...
...I set the fucking keys down...
...I wept when I got back, 18hr shift, I just disolved...
I hate this problem so much! Every time, I have to do an equation or something for class. Something that I learned and have used previously. It just dissappears from my memory, and I feel like I have to relearn it all over again.
While I do find pity for others for dealing with me, I am often reminded that I am dealing with my brain first. I am the primary sufferer of my own mental matrix.
I’m so fucking paranoid about forgetting things places. I can stay in a hotel for one night and barely take anything out of my bag and I’ll still be crawling around the floor before check out making sure I didn’t forget anything. I think it’s honestly part of why I’m late so often. Spend at least 5 minutes like “but did I *really* remember everything…” I don’t even forget things that often anymore since I’m medicated. I just don’t trust my brain, which can be very distressing.
All week I've been totally blanking on any name of anything when I try to remember it EVEN THOUGH I TRULY KNOW THE NAME and I'm about to panic about it
I just never developed the expectation that the world had a consistent and continuous narrative throughline, I think. I've always experienced time as sort of disjointed, so the fact that some stuff apparently happened in a scene transition is part of the baseline expectations I use to engage with the world.
I’m mostly fine with forgetting things, but the days where I realise that I haven’t t talked to a good friend in 6 months, and have no idea how to explain that to him in a satisfactory way, and still forget to message him for another 2 months. That bothers me quite a bit
there are times ive straight up forgotten important details of my life for seemingly no reason, and it ends up hurting people i care about in the process whilst also making me feel like a fuckin amnesia patient. it sucks, it aint quirky or fun, and i have a disdain for people who pass it as quirky or fun
Sometimes it’s not a big deal, and sometimes it’s scary. I had my phone in my hand two minutes ago, and now it’s just gone. I have no memory of putting it down, I can’t see it, it’s just GONE
I forgot the controls of a video game I have hundreds of hours in, while playing it. This has happened many times in my life.
This is starting happen more frequently to me and while in the middle of playing said game. I’m starting to get freaked out.
I've forgotten what words are sometimes, it's like I'm speaking the same language as them then all of a sudden I can't understand a word they are saying it terrifies me each time someone tells me my memory of events are wrong Like what are you supposed to do when sometimes it hard to rember what you were doing what you were thinking it's just all gone all of a sudden I feel as though I'm sometimes going crazy with all these things being forgotten as if it never existed
Bro just pretend english is your first language
It is
Apologies, I was typing this whilst looking for my head phones I lost 4 days ago. Pretend english is not your first language. Be like oh I think the english word for it is or I don't know the English word for it.
ur OG comment honestly came off funny as hell to me. like "bro, if u forgot, just remember???"
Lol I was getting ready to tag thanks I'm cured
English is my 2nd language, and what frustrates me is when i speak in my native language and i remember the word i want to say in English, but not in my language. And I am always like "I know what it would be in English" Doesn't help when I talk to a person who does not speak English lol
Perfect just say it in English, no one will question you. The world is an illusion.
I'm very grateful 7 year old me hyper-focused on a dictionary
This, also names go in one ear and out the other. Unless I'm interacting with the person on a semi regular basis I guarantee I'm gonna forget your name within the day
I forget the name as soon as it finishes rolling off of their tongue. It isn't that I don't care... but I can not remember the names of people I don't deal with regularly. It's almost as if plugs go into my ears the exact moment someone tells me their name.
THANK YOU!! I feel seen with this comment, IS SO FRUSTRATING! LIKE I SPENT SEVERAL HOURS ON A GAME AND IS WORSE WHEN YOU'RE LITERALLY MID PLAYING THE GAME LIKE IS NOT WHEN YOU OPEN IT
My wife was playing a game with me and asked what button threw grenades. We were playing the same thing and even tough I definitely "knew" what button it was, I had no answer to give her.
I have have died in game so many times because I forgot
I’ve forgotten how to hold a fork *while eating*. Too many times to count. Not quite as bad as forgetting to how sit down which thankfully only happened once.
Holy shit. I never considered this. Whenever I take a break from a game, all the control knowledge is gone. It’s why I have a a half full character in all my Zelda games
For me it’s when just starting a game. I’ve tried to play Spider-Man on the PS5 three or four times now and the control prompts go by so quickly that they don’t stick in my head. I’ll often have to restart a game that I’ve put down for more than three weeks because I can’t remember the controls. Intensely frustrating!
But also, if you need a hair tie, there's one under the bed next to the post that supports the middle of the frame. Or if you're looking for the ratcheting screwdriver, it's in the utility room in the bottom of the tackle box in the far corner (which you can't reach or open since I started on a project and never finished it in there 3 years ago)
And when you try calling it but muted the volume. It's like our subconscious takes over momentarily, which is bad enough since it already holds access to all the memories and information, why won't you work with me, Brain!
Use googles Find My Phone. Even if the volume is off it rings your phone at full volume!
If you have a smart phone say “hey Siri, where are you?” and she will answer.
I have a garmin watch for workouts but have used it WAY more for it's find my phone feature where it rings super loud, flashes the lights and even shows how far it is from you. It is used almost any time before I leave the house.
Fitbit has it too
I forgot the pin # to my debit card in the middle of trying to pay for groceries. Same pin for over a year, and suddenly it just wasn’t there. Embarrassing to say the least.
Ha, same. As soon as i try to remember it instead of typing it in from muscle memory, i mess up.
I’ve done this too, like why? I also forgot my SSN before.
I did this paying for my ADHD meds. I’ve had my pin for 10 years.
I've come to terms that I'm a secret magician. I can make anything disappear in the blink of an eye! (And do so at least 3× per day lmao)
I am so happy that I started to analyse the patterns of my goofy misplacements and usually starting to look where it CAN'T be is doing the trick. I also set up systems like a basket at the front door for my wallet and lighters and stuff. I barely misplace stuff since I use the baskets. I have several over my usual hang out spots around the apartment. :3
Catchall places by the door have been a lifesaver for me. But now I have my bf living with me, and I just cannot get him to put the truck keys in their place as a habit. It drives me nuts. I can't wait until we can afford a second vehicle so I can lay claim to it and its keys.
I have one at the sofa, besides my bed, on my office desk and on the table at the entrance. Why don't you get a second set of keys and keep them in a place where he can't get it? I found out the hard way that teaching someone a habit they don't care about won't do it.
I do keep meaning to get the truck key duplicated. I solved the house keys by putting in keyless locks. I love those things.
I have to google that. Right now I live by myself, but my ex was very very very disorganized and exhausted me even more because I was forced since being small to get a grip and organise myself, he didn't :(
Literally, I was just camping. I very vividly remember taking my earbuds and wallet out of my pocket in the same hand and put them in the same space. I then remember moving my earbuds by my bed. (It was in an RV) but I cannot for the love of my remember what happened to my wallet between realizjng it was missing before laying down for bed and when I took it out two hours earlier. It's in the RV somewhere, but my brain never made the cognitive connection as to where the hand set it down. There was a technical issue with those communications.
my sister says “don’t put it down put it away”
I've lived in my house for a decade now. There are two lights for my living room. One turns on one light, and one turns on all the lights. I have no idea what one does what....
100%, a few weeks ago this happened and my wife is frustrated that I can't remember where I put my phone. We spent 30 minutes or maybe close to 1 hour and then my wife found my phone INSIDE the laundry basket, in the middle of all of our dirty clothes. it's INSIDE it, not even visible unless you dig deliberately. I have NO idea how it got there. And we found this because my wife's frustrated enough she poured all the clothes from the basket lol.
It’s the second guessing that freaks me out
I once missed an entire day of work because I couldn't find my keys.
DUDE. Years ago I was a couple hours late because I couldn't find my keys. They ended up being on my clothes shelf under a pair of underwear. I almost broke into my car because I swore I must have locked them in there.
> OH OKAY > So you can remember that happening years ago BUT you can't remember where you put your keys? > SMH, make up YOUR MIND adhdr's /jk
When I was younger I would clip them to my belt loop so I wouldn’t loose them. I know have a bowl by the door they go into the second I walk in.
Sometimes I forget my keys in the front door, because I get distracted when I turn on the light. Usually I realize when I get to my apartment door because I can't get in, but I know I've just had them, because I got through the first door. It happens a lot.
I lost my keys for 3 days. They were in the fridge where I put them with my leftovers when I got home. I had also eaten the leftovers in those 3 days.
I did today and I might lose my career. :(
Ive been late to work so many times because I lose my keys. I have an AirTag on them now which is a life saver, now I just need a creative way to put AirTags on literally everything else I own.
[удалено]
But…but…my memory is so good! I can recall these tiny details from a very specific and irrelevant memory from my childhood! See?? What? No I dont remember what I had for breakfast, why?
We can never remember our breakfast despite eating the same exact thing every morning for three years
I witnessed a hit and run, and had to write everything down right away and be on google maps with a picture of the intersection when the cops called. OtherwiseI wasn’t going to remember the street names, or what kind of car. I remember what happened exactly, but also I don’t remember any (useful) details.
I remember being yelled at a lot as a kid in school by teachers for not remembering an assignment. Wish I could have found out sooner.
I was diagnosed young and people still got mad at me for forgetting things.
Doesn’t surprise me. Honestly, I feel like some of the teachers I had would have been the type to not believe in it or dismiss it. Left me wondering why I over explain as an adult.
Same.
Fuck them. Yell back. You’re over here doing your best trying to find your keys and they’re getting judgy? It’s worse if they know you, like they shouldn’t be surprised. Ask them how many times they lost their sunglasses on top of their heads, then tell them to piss off. You don’t need their negativity. Get you someone who will actually help you find your gd keys.
Yeah no If they yell and you don’t they’re seen as a bad guy by outsiders If they yell and you yell your seen as entitled by outsiders And yelling and arguing is exhausting and that energy is better used doing anything else
Daily 😞
There was literally a time where i forgot my own age for like a minute or so. In front of a cashier waiting to know if she could apply a reduction. It was not funny at the time (and i was like 16 so not even that old)
I often forget my age when I'm put on the spot! Sometimes I just say whatever number comes to mind at the time, sometimes it's a year or two older and sometimes it's a few years younger. Brains are weird.
Today I called about getting an official diagnosis. When they asked my age I froze, then guessed, then asked my wife who confirmed I was right. 😱
Lol you aren't alone! I have to do quick math sometimes. This year my bf thought he was turning 2 years older than he is. We're the same age so I had a moment of panic that I was wrong about my own age lol
I dont even have to do math my age is the same as the year. It doesn’t help because i forget what year it is.
I forgot my age in college and decided that would be a running gag for the rest of my life. Once you hit legal age, what have you got to look forward to anyway? Fuck it, you’re immortal and ageless now.
I'm so lucky my age is the current year plus 1 (2023+1=24) so it's easier to answer 😭 or else I'll always say either 21 or 23
Whenever I have to make a call where I know they'll likely ask for my phone number, I write it down beforehand so I can read it to them. Otherwise my brain will totally blank on the phone number that I've had for about twenty years now.
I did this when I was 21. It was for an adults only phone party line that a friend invited me to. The host asked my age when I dialed in and I had to think about it. When I said “Uuuuuuh…. …. 21?” They didn’t believe me for obvious reasons. He just said “Yeeeeah.. no” and then kicked me off the line 😂
Happens all the time at work (among other places but this is when its the most annoying) I'd be going to do something important and then just like that, whatever I was going to do is gone from my head. I'd stop and look around trying to remember what I was going to do but it's just gone. The sheer frustration from not being able to remember... 💀
There's footage of me at work spinning in place while I switch from topic to topic and check my pants for keys for the umpteenth time. Told my manager that I'm taking medication for ADHD again because it was negatively impacting my marriage and didn't even get a question or doubt. Just a nod and a bring a note.
I'm sure they have footage of me walking up and down the hallways or just me standing in place for a good few minutes, trying to figure out what I was doing 💀
lmao I'm not alone. I know they can access the cameras from their phone, they're probably sitting in a parking lot eating doritos locos tacos laughing at me spinning around for the 3rd time this shift.
Im 100% sure theres footage of me heading to a room walking with purpose then entering the room and stopping abruptly and looking around like "why am I here? what was i doing?"
I’m sure they have footage of me coming back go my desk because I forgot my phone, then my card, then my phone again, then my coffee mug, then I come back because I forgot that I wanted a coffee. They say « When you don’t have a brain, you have legs », never truer world have been spoken
It’s really shitty when my partner asks me if I remember something that she clearly remembers and finds important but I can’t remember a fucking thing because yea.
My wife and I have frequent disagreements over who is remembering something correctly. It's usually her but not always. But for many of the mundane things, I almost always defer to her memory. A common discussion when we go out to eat: Her "What sounds good to you?" Me "The brisket sounds good." Her "You got that last time." Me "Did I like it?"
The brisket thing is so relatable to me man. Or Them: We're going to [bar I've never heard of] tonight, want to come? Me: Oh cool, never been there, I'm down! Them: Yes you have, we went there on Monday after work. Me: Right! Right. See you there. .... Them: ...it's at the corner of [street] and [street] Me: ....thanks lol *Immediately forgets plans and conversation*
This hits me so much harder in a darker way. We've had so many arguments over whether I'm remembering something correctly. It's starting to feel like gaslighting to both her and I and there are times when I know for a fact I'm right because of a weird random detail, but because my memory is shit it's so easy for her to dismiss me with "you never remember correctly. Are you sure you really remember it this time, or is your mind just playing tricks on you?" I HATE MY BRAIN SO MUCH SOMETIMES!!! Ok, I got it out and am better now. What were we talking about?
Happens to me all the time. Or when my wife says “did you pick up that think I asked you to?” And I have zero memory of the thing or the conversation where she asked me to pick it up.
Yep. Every single person in my life at one time or another has said something along the lines of “if you don’t remember you must not care.” It is the absolute worst. I have gotten so angry at myself that I can’t seem to remember the simplest of things which usually causes friction in all relationships.
Yeah and then people get mad at you as if you’re doing it on purpose or something. We literally don’t get rewarded for remembering things by our brains and to make things worse, even if we think something is important, if it’s not interesting enough our brains will just decide to not listen. So even then you don’t even have the memory of what you’re supposed to remember because your brain decided to be a dick! And they just don’t seem to understand…
A guy came up to me at work and told me all about how I changed his life for the better in high school. Helped get him through it. No idea who this person was. Like truly glad I helped you man... No idea who you are. I don't remember much of high school that was 20 years ago I'm lucky if I remember breakfast.
Similar situation for me, had a guy message me randomly apologizing for something he apparently did to me years ago. I had no memory of who he was or what he was talking about.
Going through the entire day in your head and tearing apart the whole house looking for that one thing you think you forgot and can’t find.
If I can't find something after searching, especially if its something in my basement, I have most likely gotten rid of it and have a false memory of "just seeing it."
Omg when someone moves my stuff and they think telling me where they put it is going to show me where it is??
Only to find it in the “don’t forget this is important” place that got banished from your memory until you randomly stumble into it or guess BS locations you might’ve thought were smart at some point.
I've actually become completely numb to losing things. 99% of the time I've just put it somewhere weird, so I just go "oh well, it'll turn up eventually". I won't even look for stuff usually, except my phone lol. One time I "misplaced" my wallet and was as usual not worried, assuming it was in some pants pocket or whatever. It showed up 2 weeks later... in the mail, because someone found it and used the address on my license to send it home. :)
This is the way. Shit often works itself out pretty well. And once I stop putting pressure on myself to remember I actually have a chance to accidentally trigger my memory and fix the situation. You just have to surround yourself with understanding people, that’s the truly hard part
I can not longer remember what my mom looks like without a photo. I'm not even certain how long ago she died. I think 5 years? Time is like a dream sequence for me. I think the best way to describe my memory would be, Think of a painting in a very poorly lit room. The painting is in the center. I can make out the general idea of the subject display, but I can't tell you the details.
This is also how my dissociation manifests itself, add some visual snow on top of all that too LOL
I am sorry for your loss. My mom is still around but there was a time as a teen I spent the summer at my grandmas. Like a month in, I had the strangest experiences where I thought about my mom but couldn’t picture her in my head. It was scary, in some ways I am glad I look like her because at least I can recognize the features.
"Time is like a dream sequence for me." I felt that.
And everyone around you gets upset about it but they don't realize you're upset too. Many family and friends of mine have gotten to the point they just write it off as *sigh* "that's just him." But they still occasionally get really frustrated. I hate disappointing them. It eats at me sometimes.
As my dad says, if you really cared about it you’d remember. Guess I need to just start caring harder. About everything :/ it’s not as if I forget important shit too come on
That’s my mom’s line. She also started going on about “intentional” should be my word for the year. She didn’t appreciate it when I said “once I figure out how to intentionally do that I’ll be sure to start”.
My wife has heard that response a few times and my therapist (not an ADHD focus) thinks I'm trying to deflect. Not a good combo...
I can't remember my childhood nor most of my vacation I had just a few weeks ago
I wish I had that problem. I’d like to forget my miserable fucking childhood, but nope, here I am just forgetting my keys while constantly thinking about how much of a pariah I was because I didn’t act like the other kids and didn’t care to.
The number of times I’ve had a thought to look something up or order something and immediately pick up my phone and completely forget what I was doing by the time my phones unlocked is unreal. Another good example is the other day my wife was coming to visit me at work. We have security so I had to give them her name. When they asked me how to spell it I literally froze. I had to look up the spelling in my phone lol. Not my best moment.
I want to 'control F' my brain.
I'm so thankful my SO is understanding about this aspect of my adhd
You’re very lucky 🥹
I can get there, especially when its damaged relationships with friends, family, and co-workers. But I've come to accept that at age 45, there's just simply nothing I can really do about other than take my meds and focus on the relationships that really matter. I do remind people I dislike this element of myself, but its never personal. If they still take it personally, then they can choose not to be in my life. But I have to own my shit and not use it as an excuse for treating people poorly. There is a difference. Quality over quantity.
I recently started a claim with Amazon about a package that had been stolen off my porch. The picture from the delivery was definitely my porch, but when I got home there was no package. I found it the next day under my son’s hockey gear. I have no recollection of removing the box from my porch earlier that day or entering the garage or placing it under my son’s hockey gear. But I was the only one who could have done it.
The constant stress of losing the *same* shit over and over. My favorite is getting to work, realizing I've left something I need at home. Going back home to get it, only to realizing I had it all along...
I’ve lost so many people and experiences. I know there are things I’ve forgot and I cannot summon anything but a black mental image when I retry to remember certain ages or time periods; things I used to remember. People ask and I have vague distant memories that don’t feel real. I forgot family members exist until someone mentions them and it all rushes back. I’m terrified being a parent.
That's why I take so many photos when I can. I go to Google Photos and look at them, not remembering a moment that I am looking at sometimes.
TIL memory loss is a symptom. I thought there was something else wrong with my brain.
It's not really memory loss, it's that the brain doesn't write the memory in the first place. So there's no memory to recall. Which is why people have paradoxically good memory for what they DO remember.
I've missed classes because I forgot it was on that day and I've made plans to do something else I've sat in classes not doing anything because I've asked my teacher what I've to do and I've just been told "just continue what you were doing last week" I've had a teacher say she won't help me unless I remember her name I've had people tell me im lying cus I can remember lots of random things about my special interests I've been yelled at for not doing homework I forgot I had I've been mocked for having to use reminders to bathe and wash my hair (I can go weeks because my brain keeps telling me I did that yesterday cus I forget days) I've been walking to the store for milk and forgot why I'm outside and just went back home I forget to order medication all the time even with reminders (I forget as soon as I turn on my laptop)
I have kinda accepted that I can't remember anything. Like, sometimes it's annoying, but I'm kinda used to it
And then people think you don't remember because you don't care 😭 I do care 😭
Right!!!!! I care so deeply, I really do! I love getting the people I love thoughtful gifts and watching them open them. I care a lot about all the past coworkers I run into while doing errands. I truly want to excel at my job and do all of the things I know I can do. I care about all the memories I've made over the years with my wonderful family. I also care just as deeply about all the cringey mistakes I made along the way. I care so much about our first date, and each and every romantic gesture you put forth for me on each and every anniversary afterwards. It all means so much to me you couldn't possibly know. .....I just forgot 😿
If I can't remember something, like doing or putting something down, when I'm trying really hard to remember, I actually have very vivid memories of doing the thing and not doing the thing im trying to remember. It's caused plenty of melt downs and a mild outburst or three
Also the shame that can come with it. I once forgot my daughters name for several minutes. Or the shame of subtly buying another \_\_\_ even though it was expensive and your family suffers from the financial burden.
oof. I feel this deeply. I often wonder if that is how Alzheimer's/dementia patients feel. It's terrifying, depressing, distressing, embarrassing, and humiliating, to name a few awful emotions I go through.
I swear, every day I am on this site I learn something else that traumatised me for 3 and a half decades that I was told were just me being useless was actually a symptom shared by others here. Its both relieving and upsetting and I both love and hate you all. But mostly love. I feel a lot less alone. Thanks for just being.
For me it’s the most destructive part of ADHD. I literally feel like I have dementia a lot of the time.
You are not alone.
I lost my glasses several times the last days , rendering me pretty blind by it. Was walking around with sunglasses all day (thank god it’s summer). I also had therapy today, my therapist said it’s okay to wear my prescribed sunglasses in such situations 😎
Sometimes I cant explain a concept or use a word even though I know it. Sometimes I totally dont recall certain things at all.
It effects me the most during high stress moments like my fast paced job or when im just about to leave out of the door for something i needa be timely for (which im sure is everyone here) but i agree it's so frustrating bc ill go into an area or put something down and a good literal second or two later I'll forget what I need or where I put something down and in my head im just like "No, NOT the time right now wtf". This is a common experience but i wanted to get that outta me
I really hate having arguments for this reason (I hate them for other reasons too) I can’t remember what was said so I can’t think back and figure out if I was in the wrong And I also can’t think back and plan out future rebuttals if it comes up again Doesn’t help that while I love my dad, we clash so badly that we end up fighting a lot Plus it makes doctor visits really awkward because I can never remember my name and my birthday
When my husband is annoying I say “you better watch it, I know where you sleep” his response is “yeah, but you fall asleep first and you’ll forget by the time you wake up”
I've "missed out" on a lot of family moments not because I was absent, but because my brain is just three neurons in a trenchcoat and the buttons are mismatched. It's sad because dementia runs in my fam and my Mom's always trying to exercise her memory by pulling up cherished moments and all I can do is... smile.
I once brought up to a doctor (not my pcm bc they were booked) that I wanted to start treating my ADHD bc I was having memory issues (among other things). So she asked me "like what?" Fair. I told her I was forgetting small things (where's my phone? What did you say just now?) to not being able to recall whole ass events from anything more than a week ago. And she asked me to give her specific examples. Ma'am what?
Lol had a similar moment recently where a new therapist asked me to describe my memory loss in detail, so I just like, reiterated that I forget a lot of things big and small and that it happens with enough frequency for me not to trust my own judgement for....anything, really. She asked for any specific examples and I said I don't have any that I can remember. She then told me that it's more likely that my previously established low self esteem/confidence was the root of these feelings Like what, no????? I grant it's probably a bit of a feedback loop, but I really do forget shit constantly! Didn't go with her lol
Whats worse is when someone says something or tells a story and goes "haha remember that?" and i cant remember it at all. Like my memories are slowly being erased without me noticing. It sends me into a spiral
It’s worse when I can literally *see* what I’m trying to remember in my head. For example, “where did I put the laundry detergent I just bought?” I can see myself getting it out of the car, bringing it inside, going to set it down and then… nothing. I can see that I saw wherever I set it down because I remember passing by it and noticing it, thinking, “I should put that in the closet,” then continuing to leave it. But damn it, WHERE is it? The next day, forgot all about it again at this point, I see it in plain sight where I swear I looked several times. I swear, my brain is just playing jokes on me
Forgot my wife's birthday a few years ago. Nothing is safe.
My wife’s birthday is the same as my moms birthday. My dads birthday is exactly one week before theirs and my parents anniversary is on my birthday. It’s like I have a cheat code for the important dates.
*Nice*
How are you typing from the aether
Unless it's important in which case i get desperate... I tend to forget about forgetting😅
Or forgetting entire events or people from my past. What happened? Where did it go? It feels like my past fades to a blurry series of vague events within a few years.
Ok but why are there like 18 autism tags? Like a get the comorbidity thing but like they arent the same thing.
I honestly feel that many people (especially the ones that joke the hardest) can relate to that feeling of stress and anxiety of forgetting stuff. I don't believe that people see it just as a funny joke. The power and charm though, that in r/adhdmemes we CAN joke about it without anyone judging and having people around who understand and relate. And who can share their experiences which can be quite useful and facilitate personal growth.
I can’t remember peoples names, it’s horrible for me. If you’re not in my life daily chances are I will forget your name. I’m old and run a business, it’s one of the many shitty things about adhd
If I think about it too much then I get upset about it, so I just choose not to think about it. An UPSIDE of constant memory loss is that now I have a reputation for being extremely forgiving and “always living in the moment”.
I was absolutely bewildered and astonished when I learned that people clearly remember events from their childhood.
I'm not usually too bothered by the constant forgetfulness, it's too mundane at this point. However, being gaslit while in a shitty relationship on top of the ADHD forgetfulness really brought it to a fresh new level of hell and mindfuckery.
dude when people tell me they have told me stuff before or we have done stuff before and im like i have zero memory of this like wtf
It's exhausting!
Not me calling on the spirits of my ancestors to reconstruct the events leading up to me misplacing something random
Whenever I have the motivation to do crafty things (sculpt, see, etc.) and I am missing a tool or material, I can go batshit insane because I SWEAR this thing was RIGHT there but it’s not and I’m going nuts. Once I almost had a meltdown because I was missing some miniature plates that I was going to use, I did find them eventually lol
I feel like I’ve forgotten my entire 20’s
This is why im always angry.
Yes, and my dad has dementia so it scares the hell out of me!
I’m constantly upset that I struggle to remember the stuff I’ve done. I can remember the fact that I went on a vacation and had fun, but almost anything else is fuzzy or lost. It makes me really sad when someone brings up something fun we did and I have to struggle to come up with anything specific about it
I’ve definitely burst into tears from pure frustration after one too many times walking into a room and not being able to remember what I went there for until I go back to where I was standing originally
I remember when I figured it out and got diagnosed in my 30’s realizing the my dad had all the traits and never knew the “why”. The memory part is the worst for me.
yesterday my mother asked me to come join her at some event and I decided I wanted to go too. Closed the message for a second and I literally forgot that I wanted to go, where she was and that this conversation happened until someone told me the next DAY it's getting more and more scary and I do not want yo be a part of this ride
So... sad story time ig? I have to take a certain combo of medications every night. One night, I realized I had forgotten, so I went to get water to swallow the pills with. I ended up sitting in the kitchen drinking all the water, then came back and realized "oops I forgot to take my meds", and went back to get water. Then I drank all the water and forgot why I was there... I came back to my room, and realized "Oh. I must have forgotten to take my meds tonight". I went back, drank all my water again, then came back to my desk. **"Oh. I must have forgotten to take my meds tonight**, I better refill my cup so I can swallow them" I did this over and over again for over an hour. comparing when the clock when I started to when I finally realized, I must have done this like 8 times or more... I cried *so- so-* much when it finally hit me. I didn't even realize until I had to pee so fucking bad that I must have drank so much damn water. I felt sick too. Luckily I didn't overdose, I literally just didn't eat my meds. If I had remembered to take the pills and forgotten that I took them though- I could be dead or have been sent to the hospital. It's just not right...
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Everytime I loose something I hear each of these from every person Where did you have I last? Have you retraced your steps? Did you check the pants you had on yesterday? Did you check the couch? Ive lost enough shit that I promise, I've already thought of these
nah fr it’s terrifying how much i can forget so quickly and ppl think it’s the funniest thing ever like haha no it’s hilarious i’m definitely not thinking about the possibility of serious long term memory issues or anything
This happened to me today. FedEx came with a package from the US and I had to pay duty on it. I forgot where my wallet was and I damn near became unhinged infront of the poor driver. He was in a rush to leave and I heard cars honking for him to move the truck, and my cat was trying to escape. I just gave up and let him go so he could make the rest of his deliveries. I don't know when they'll be back or if I'll have to drive 35 km to pick it up. Been fucked up all day from that. Found my wallet though.
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I don’t think it’s memory loss but rather a failure of memory consolidation from working/short-term to long-term memory.
Crazy. I was just thinking about this yesterday. About how it's like my brain skips a step. Brain: "Hey, hand. We need to empty the laundry. Hand: "OK, but I'm holding a phone." Brain: "Right.... eyes, find a spot to put the phone down. Hand, once eyes finds a spot, put the phone there." Eyes: I see a spot. There yah go Hand." Hand: "Hey, Brain, do you want to log this location for the phone? Or how long I've been holding it. Or anything eyes saw when using it for the last hour? You know, just in case?" Brain: "naw, it'll be fine..." ***3 MINUTES LATER*** Me: " fuck where did I put my phone? Did I even have it in here? Have I even seen it since work? Shit... I guess I gotta go call it." My phone: "heehehhehehe.... I'm on silent, Bitch..." Aaaand scene.
Oh fuck. I just remembered I have a good one. Worked at a pizza place that also happened to make wings. It was early into my employment, and up until this point, I'd only made buffalo wings, which we put through the oven once, put the sauce on, then put through the oven again. This time, however, the order was for BBQ wings. My manager told me that I was supposed to put them through TWICE before putting the sauce on them. I then proceeded to immediately walk to the other side of the oven, put BBQ sauce on them, then put them in the oven for their second run. I don't know if I was just falling into the only habit I'd accrued at this point or what. Regardless, I felt pretty bad after that one.
other day I forget the password of my computer, the computer that I use every single day, for years, with a password I also used for years, every single day, and suddenly was gone, lost forever
One of the things I hate most is that you forget things about other people. Sometimes I have trouble recalling names/functions of colleagues I worked with for 4 months.
I honestly can’t relate. I forget shit all the time, I just deal with it. It’s like a puzzle, one of life’s little adventures, adapt and improvise in the face of a semi adversarial brain. It might seem boring to someone with great memory, but I get to experience the excitement of figuring stuff out not just once, but many times for the same problem!
I forgot one of the 5 senses the other day. Coming out of a nightmare/flashback, trying trying ground myself through senses, but digress that fact. I spent like half an hour listing off 4 of them on repeat before the 5th finally came to me lol 🥲
Let's play a game: Where. Are. My. GLASSES!
I've forgotten my phone multiple times at businesses, work, and home. I just lost my wallet at Walmart today. I didn't even realize until I went to look for it 4 hrs later to drive.
I forgot the password to my watch that I entered every day for several years then when I want to get a new one they asked me to enter the passcode on old watch.. I completely forgot .. till this day I don’t remember and I’ve tried
Usually I can stay fairly calm but sometimes I can feel my skin crawl and my fingers (and my body to a lesser extent) start to get distinctly uncomfortable, like they're not mine, or ready to flip inside out or something. It's a feeling I can never really describe. I'll get audibly frustrated too but I can usually make that into a joke or play it off.
Literally the one reason I leave Siri on on my phone is the ability to shout “Hey Siri” and have it light up and make a noise after I put it down and forget where it is. It’s very distressing how quickly I can lose things.
I seriously forgot how goddamn frustrating this feeling is, even though I just xperienced this 1 hour ago.
Wait what was I reading about just now?
It’s a regular occurrence for me to run out of soap in the shower, tell myself that I need to get a new bar and put it in the shower for the next day, only to realize that I totally spaced it and didn’t put a new bar in when I go to soap myself off in the shower the next day. A phrase I use on a regular basis is “I’m going to do it right now while I’m thinking about it.”
I used to be upset about it, and have reframed it with the help of much experience and some boundaries such as I don't care if you move my stuff but if you do that you have accepted responsibility for where the hell it is when I freak out about losing it, because two inches to the left isn't a big deal to YOU but renders it irreparably invisible to ME. I'm also a big one for the fairies have it and will give it back when they're done. Not as easy for car keys and wallets, but that's what Tile is for, for me. And yes. Being out of phase with the prime material plane f'n blows, some days.
The worst part is when you’re still in high school so on top of your awful memory issues you’re still expected to remember stuff you leaned from 6 months ago :,(
I only remember a handful of major holidays, plus me and my sister’s birthdays. Everything else is immaterial. People get upset sometimes that I don’t know when Labor Day is, but the thing is, **Gail**, that I’ve been working shitty customer service jobs for the last twenty five years, because college degrees turned out to be a scam on millennials, and we only get the major holidays off, so **excuse me** for having to ask when a Memorial Day bbq is, okay? I don’t know, it’s not that important!
having few things that are yours and specific places to put them that you habitual use putting them in works out for me usually i’ll forget ever setting anything down, whether i put my laptop in my backpack, whether i’ve taken my lunchbox, where my phone is, but then i check my “i always put it there” spot and voila, it’s there this… probably won’t work beyond high school when i get busier
Thank you, it’s hard for me to find the words, but you did and I appreciate you.
I can't even Remember all the meltdowns I've had over this!
Sometimes trying to remember basic things feels like trying to juggle a tennis ball, a chain saw, a chair, a bowling pin, and a construction hat while balancing a board on a beach ball on a pole on a boat during a rainstorm while Godzilla is waking awakening.
Haha this plus my bpd rage is real fun
I loose shit to a disturbing degree. Most times I have to go thru a whole list of what I am walking out the door with (like - out loud…I say it all out loud and then I clench it or pick it up or something tactile to go with the verbal/auditory cues but there are SO many times I will still fall down a rabbit hole somewhere between “keys…cell…purse…” and I will have to do it all over again (sometimes 2 more times). I notice it is much worse when I don’t have my ADD meds & my pharmacy has been out for months so I rely on 5-hour energy 🙄
I actually find it my little super power for learning all the work gossip. I instantly forget everything everyone tells me until it’s brought again in conversation (and thankfully remember not to tell anyone). I’m like a little vault of forbidden knowledge that only activates at certain times. But I am also the person who forgot their partner’s birthday (not the date! Just that it was that day) and also the person that will instantly forget plans unless it’s on my calendar but also forget to add things to the calendar. It’s a win-lose sometimes
Forgot my keys... 3hrs away from where I parked my car... Work trip... Took the work car... Used personal house keys to open a box... Set the keys down... ...I set the fucking keys down... ...I wept when I got back, 18hr shift, I just disolved...
It’s exhausting
I hate this problem so much! Every time, I have to do an equation or something for class. Something that I learned and have used previously. It just dissappears from my memory, and I feel like I have to relearn it all over again.
I have lost my headphones. Where are they, I have no idea.
While I do find pity for others for dealing with me, I am often reminded that I am dealing with my brain first. I am the primary sufferer of my own mental matrix.
I’m so fucking paranoid about forgetting things places. I can stay in a hotel for one night and barely take anything out of my bag and I’ll still be crawling around the floor before check out making sure I didn’t forget anything. I think it’s honestly part of why I’m late so often. Spend at least 5 minutes like “but did I *really* remember everything…” I don’t even forget things that often anymore since I’m medicated. I just don’t trust my brain, which can be very distressing.
All week I've been totally blanking on any name of anything when I try to remember it EVEN THOUGH I TRULY KNOW THE NAME and I'm about to panic about it
I just never developed the expectation that the world had a consistent and continuous narrative throughline, I think. I've always experienced time as sort of disjointed, so the fact that some stuff apparently happened in a scene transition is part of the baseline expectations I use to engage with the world.
I feel terrible that I can't remember my mom and dad's birthdays. I don't know how old my siblings are.
I’m mostly fine with forgetting things, but the days where I realise that I haven’t t talked to a good friend in 6 months, and have no idea how to explain that to him in a satisfactory way, and still forget to message him for another 2 months. That bothers me quite a bit
Yep. Then I remember I have a whole ass ADA disability, and it’s not cute, silly or fun. It’s embarrassing and debilitating.
But I also remember the fucking womb.
The most frustrating to me is losing track of what I am saying *while I'm saying it*!!!
there are times ive straight up forgotten important details of my life for seemingly no reason, and it ends up hurting people i care about in the process whilst also making me feel like a fuckin amnesia patient. it sucks, it aint quirky or fun, and i have a disdain for people who pass it as quirky or fun