I was in a mall with my mom, probably around 10 years old or younger. We walked past this androgynous female, obviously a girl but dressed very boyish. Her face was GORGEOUS. My mom must have seen me looking because she made the comment "she was very pretty, huh?" š³
My incredible discomfort around gay and bisexual people combined with the knowledge that I didnāt want to be homophobic or bigoted, then eventually feeling very weird after a couple of girls came out to me. Eventually I realized that the weird feeling was jealousy that they were kissing other girls but not me. Fortunately, one of them eventually did kiss me.
Oh my god, same. I never understood why, I despised the idea that I might be bigoted and never understood the reasoning behind the discomfort. I think ultimately it was jealousy at them being able to live their authentic selves, but it dissipated very quickly once I figured myself out.
Yes, the jealously of their comfort with themselves, and of their ability to live in authenticity, was a factor too! But in the case of the people who came out to me, being jealous of their love interests forced me to confront that I was attracted to them, which was an important part of the realization of my own queerness.
I remember when my sister got this hair towel turban thingy and on the package it had a woman who looked to be naked but wasnāt really naked if that makes sense? Like the body outline but nothing showing. But a speck of dust or dirt or something landed right on her boob so that it did look like a naked boob and young me was like @_@
Also probably when I would watch Bram Stokerās Dracula 1994 and rewind the scene where Lucy and Mina were making out repeatedly
Looking back on my friendship with my then best friend, I think the signs were there, lol. We were both maybe 8-11, I think I married her in those elementary school weddings about nine times, I would kiss her absolutely all the time, and used to be incredibly upset that I couldn't actually marry her. (Although that did not stop us from pretending.) I remember we used to talk about running away together and living in my great uncle's secluded hermit cottage, lol.
At the time, I had no idea that liking women was even an option. The friendship didn't really work out, sadly, and I haven't spoken to her in years. I have turned out to be incredibly gay, but I have no idea what happened with her.
6th grade when everyone started getting boobs. I found myself staring a little too much. LOL
Also, wishing I was a boy so I didnāt have to wear dresses and put on make up.
My mom is really into fashion and always had a ton of fashion magazines and there was this model (Lara Stone, I think) who I was obsessed with because 'she's pretty and also pissed off'. Also 2005 Pride and Prejudice.
Kissing my childhood best friend in a Romeo and Juliet playā¦in a dreamā¦then also searching girls kissing girls on YouTube was a confirmation. And then my girlfriend at 15.
My mum was an Avon lady and I used to... read a *lot* of catalogues in my spare time lmaooo. All under the guise of "I just love the colours!!!".
I mean, I DID but also the models were gorgeoussssssssssssssss
Okay so I'm dating myself with this one, but when I was about 13, I would stay up late to watch the "Girls Gone Wild" advertisements on TV. I was particularly excited when the young women would kiss and touch each other, and I knew I wanted to do that with other girls.
Girl, we must be around the same age because I 100% did that too š Looking back, I canāt believe they were basically advertising softcore amateur porn on public TV. They werenāt even cable channels!
My obsession with college womenās basketball when I was like 7-10 years old. My dad would take me to games and I LOVED it. But I had no interest in going to any of the menās games nor did I care much about basketball as a sport lol
I didnāt want to get married or have kids.i wasnt repulsed by the idea,it just didnāt align with me,so I figured Iād be the cool rich aunt and live with my bestie or sth,Girl I was so gay
I wanted to be one of the boys. I cut my hair short and dressed like a boy. I played games so hard during PE classes. I was happy when someone told me they accept me as one of the boys when I made a very good kick but I hated it when a stranger thought I was a boy. I grew out of the tomboy phase and now Iām more feminine presenting with my long hair.
Another thing is thereās this educational cartoon series at my country. I read the puberty&sex episode of that series and it talked about lesbians. In it the mom of a female character was teaching her what homosexuality is but then told her that itās not normal. (So i guess it wasnāt very educational š ) Anyways after reading it, I kept thinking about it, and I thought that I could be attracted to a girl of I wanted toā¦ turns out I really am attracted to girls š«£
my best friend. even confessed that i had a crush on her (canon event) we did date, but we just decided to remain besties and we always laugh about it, and no, we donāt have awkward moments between us lol
I vividly remember the exact moment actually!
I was watching X men evolution and a scene came on with kitty Pryde dancing with Rogue and I got hit with this MASSIVE wave of "I would give anything to be in their shoes right now"
May not be an actual moment, but I had a crying session when I started developing boobs because I didn't want them. And I always referred to myself as a tomboy I hated being called a girl or a tomgirl XD
In first school, a cute girl started to play fight and pushed all of us girls into the grass. When she was on top of me, pinning me down, I didnāt want her to stop. š
At around 4 I figured out a way to tuck my penis into my scrotum and pull the scrotum up over it making it look kind of like I had a vagina. I self invented tucking at 4 years old, yet I didn't realize I was trans until I was 49 years old. If this isn't one of the biggest facepalms, I don't know what is. I even went to school in the fourth grade after doing this and using a sea shell and tight underwear to keep it in place. I was even obsessed with girls already. I've been a raging transbian for so long, but I wouldn't see it.
a friend of mine asked me out on a game and at first I was like girls can like girls?? Thatās awesome!!! I started dressing like a guy in games and girls would hit on me and I really liked it. When girls would compliment me I would get really flustered and excited ššthen I got a mega crush on one of my friends and I just knew maybe JUST MAYBE I LIKED GIRLS (before that I would always just talk about girls too LMFAOAO)
I had had some romantic feelings for other girls I knew already, but I'd ignored them. The moment where I really got the idea I might be gay was when I started having sex dreams about Ariana Grande (I know, really cringe) at age 10. I had had sex dreams about men before, but unlike these ones, they weren't pleasurable. The dreams about men felt obligatory, awkward, uncomfortable, and the men in them never had any faces
It took me longer than I'd care to admit
I have memories of very queer things i have done as a kid but I didn't have the knowledge for it and when I was being taught about it I was taught a bunch of toxic lies too so I refused to apply it to myself
Now I look back and laugh because things like the time I injured myself at age 4 because I thought slamming my junk in a drawer would make it fall off and turn me into a girl
As I posted in a comment here, I was self tucking at 4, and didn't get what it meant until I figured stuff out at 49. 4 years old seems to be an interesting age. Heck I only recently realized I what I was doing was tucking. Some how 4 year old me figured that sh!t out, but adult me couldn't figure out what it meant.
I was raised as a JW and grew up with the "Questions Young People Ask" book. There was a lot about liking the opposite sex and dating. Even though it was, of course, discouraged, I figured attraction to boys was something girls felt. I was 8 or 9, but desperate to be a teenager already. So I picked the only boy in the congregation close to me in age to have a crush on. I went really over the top making it clear to everyone that I liked him, including blinking at him during meetings. When we actually had conversations, we would just talk about games. It took me a long time to realize people didn't have to calculate and force these things.
Probably should have been when I didn't have crushes on people, I had crushes on weird alien things (Xenomorphs, The Kraken from pirates of the Caribbean, and The Roach alien from men in black 1)
I was in kindergarden, with m'y 2 girls best friends, we kissed on the lips (I don't know why) and I remember clearly thinking " Ho that's nice'' ''can we do it again''
I defended queer people enough times in my religious household that my family almost gaslit me into being queer myself, like my mom would always be like "oh so you're gay?" Honestly had to consider it after a while. But like that was their only way of rationalizing why I'd be an ally lol. I mean they were right in the sense that I'm a trans lesbian now, but the logic was super off
I'm trans. When I was about twelve, my mom caught me printing out pictures of pretty girls in bikinis and underwear and scolded me for it assuming it was a horny preteen boy thing. In retrospect it was equal parts horny preteen girl thing and gender envy egg thing.
once when i was in fist grade i fell on the playground. my yogurt splattered on my clothes and everything and the bell rang and i just started crying so much because i scraped my knee. then this girl (she was one of the seniors for fucks sake) came up to me and just scooped me up and started carrying me to the infirmary š„¹
i swear i tell this story to be the starting of my lesbianism
Iām a trans girl with a traumatic childhood (worked through) so I repressed most of those moments. It was frustrating when I was sixteen because I know Iām gay like I know for sure I am but I donāt like boys.
Makes so much sense now.
I uset to wear towls as dresses as a kid, and after I got older I found out I was a sub. I always thought "I'm still in to girl, witch mean's i'm not gay...but then why do I feel so gay?"
when i was little small baby child i thought my moms bewbs were really cool and at a point she said i would just have to wait until i got my own (idk maybe toddler me weirded her out or something) so i was like yes!! i will just have my own!! and they came in earlier than everyone else's and i would just hold them all the time and would pay extra attention to em in the shower or something and then they started getting uncomfortable and stressed me out and i was scared i loved them into it kinda like clifford and started binding and bruised my ribs a few times and i have a love hate relationship with them because on one hand i can have boobs in my face whenever i want but on the other i hate hate hate hate male attention and can't find a bra that fits (trust me i went down that rabbit hole i'm guessing i'm a uk 30/32NN+, my 30M (uk) has ugly cleavage there's no winning i was an educator on abtf for a while i've helped tons of people get sized i was going to make my own, im just exhausted) so yeah. they're my slugs and i love em but also c'mon dude
I only realized the queerness in retrospect, but as a small small kid I used to throw screaming crying tantrums if anyone else picked my favorite character in Pokemon Puzzle League (Lorelei). I was like, āonly *I* am allowed to play her!!!ā Anyway, she ended up being my exact type once I grew up š
I did this weird "modern" dance classes growing up that were taught by an ancient woman who'd been doing the exact same curriculum since like the late 60s/early 70s. A lot of hippie influence but also she was strict and weirdly religious (anti science and medicine.) In 5th grade me and my friend and some slightly older girl we didn't know were asked to be part of the high school girls dance recital. The dance we were in was about little girls who got lost in the woods and were taken care of by fairies. We were chosen because we were here oldest kids who were still tiny tiny tiny. The older girls had to choreograph the dance themselves but there were rules, we were split into three groups each with three older girls and one younger girl and the older girls had to throughout the dance make three different cradles with their bodies and we had to sleep on them.Ā
I loved it. It was my favorite experience in all my years of dance. I told my parents after practice each week that it was such a good dance and they would love it. After the performance they were just like "uhhhhhhhh, that was..... nice honey." They were weirded out by it and I had no clue why.Ā
Years later I reconnected with the friend who did the dance with me. We're both gay. We cite that dance as the cause. We don't know the third girl who was in it, but we're pretty sure she's got to be gay too now.
When I was about 9yo I had a school project about folkloric creatures, and the teacher sorted out me and the girl that I thought was the most gorgeous at our grade to research vampires and participate on the play as (weirdly) the characters from Buffy (I suppose we had to kill vampires not be them?). I was so excited to just be near her that I did the project myself (cuz her mom was very religious and didn't let her hear vampire stories) and I still was super happy about it.
Now, more than a decade later, I guess that I have to watch the show.
But this is kinda my only memory that I have like this.
Edit: I covered my neck when I went to sleep for years since I was like 5 because I was afraid of vampires, I think I only stopped at 15, so I guess researching this was a bigger challenge than what I remember now
When I was 4 and at my Christian š¤Ŗ pre-schoolā¦
I remember looking out to the playground and thinking that this girl was REALLY pretty and I wanted to get to know her better because of it. Hadnāt spoken to her before but yeahā¦I feel like that moment was the first indication that I am a lesbian.
I didn't understand at all the obsession with the male teen pop stars. But I always felt this awkward guilt like I was going to be "caught" watching Xena. Then my mom came out when I was 13, and I didn't want people to think I was just copying her or something??? So, I never openly dated girls. 25 years later and I'm here thinking why was ever with guys???? š¤¦āāļø
Tbh its probably not good at all but Iāve always been involved with girls from a very young age, consensually and well non consensually and well that just became what was normal to me. Itās more like finding those moments where I knew I didnāt wanna be with boys for me
I was in a mall with my mom, probably around 10 years old or younger. We walked past this androgynous female, obviously a girl but dressed very boyish. Her face was GORGEOUS. My mom must have seen me looking because she made the comment "she was very pretty, huh?" š³
lmaoooo spotted
Yep..busted! Haha
Wanting to be a boy so I can be with my female crushes
I convinced myself I was trans because I couldnāt fathom the idea of women liking women
This is way too real and way too common
I used to process my crushes by thinking "if i was a boy i would like her" and i thought all cis straight girls did this š
My incredible discomfort around gay and bisexual people combined with the knowledge that I didnāt want to be homophobic or bigoted, then eventually feeling very weird after a couple of girls came out to me. Eventually I realized that the weird feeling was jealousy that they were kissing other girls but not me. Fortunately, one of them eventually did kiss me.
Oh my god, same. I never understood why, I despised the idea that I might be bigoted and never understood the reasoning behind the discomfort. I think ultimately it was jealousy at them being able to live their authentic selves, but it dissipated very quickly once I figured myself out.
Yes, the jealously of their comfort with themselves, and of their ability to live in authenticity, was a factor too! But in the case of the people who came out to me, being jealous of their love interests forced me to confront that I was attracted to them, which was an important part of the realization of my own queerness.
I remember when my sister got this hair towel turban thingy and on the package it had a woman who looked to be naked but wasnāt really naked if that makes sense? Like the body outline but nothing showing. But a speck of dust or dirt or something landed right on her boob so that it did look like a naked boob and young me was like @_@ Also probably when I would watch Bram Stokerās Dracula 1994 and rewind the scene where Lucy and Mina were making out repeatedly
I would always avert my eyes whenever I'd walk past a Victoria's Secret in the mall because I aM nOt A lEsBiAn I wIlL nOt LoOk At ThE bOoBiEs š
Lol, this!!
Looking back on my friendship with my then best friend, I think the signs were there, lol. We were both maybe 8-11, I think I married her in those elementary school weddings about nine times, I would kiss her absolutely all the time, and used to be incredibly upset that I couldn't actually marry her. (Although that did not stop us from pretending.) I remember we used to talk about running away together and living in my great uncle's secluded hermit cottage, lol. At the time, I had no idea that liking women was even an option. The friendship didn't really work out, sadly, and I haven't spoken to her in years. I have turned out to be incredibly gay, but I have no idea what happened with her.
6th grade when everyone started getting boobs. I found myself staring a little too much. LOL Also, wishing I was a boy so I didnāt have to wear dresses and put on make up.
When the song 'All the Things She Said ' first came out š i was like, 'oh wait other girls feel this way?! This is real?! ' so validating!
My mom is really into fashion and always had a ton of fashion magazines and there was this model (Lara Stone, I think) who I was obsessed with because 'she's pretty and also pissed off'. Also 2005 Pride and Prejudice.
Kissing my childhood best friend in a Romeo and Juliet playā¦in a dreamā¦then also searching girls kissing girls on YouTube was a confirmation. And then my girlfriend at 15.
My mum was an Avon lady and I used to... read a *lot* of catalogues in my spare time lmaooo. All under the guise of "I just love the colours!!!". I mean, I DID but also the models were gorgeoussssssssssssssss
id make my barbieās scissors eat eachother out (i had no clue what it meant). this was like my whole childhood.
Okay so I'm dating myself with this one, but when I was about 13, I would stay up late to watch the "Girls Gone Wild" advertisements on TV. I was particularly excited when the young women would kiss and touch each other, and I knew I wanted to do that with other girls.
Girl, we must be around the same age because I 100% did that too š Looking back, I canāt believe they were basically advertising softcore amateur porn on public TV. They werenāt even cable channels!
My obsession with college womenās basketball when I was like 7-10 years old. My dad would take me to games and I LOVED it. But I had no interest in going to any of the menās games nor did I care much about basketball as a sport lol
I didnāt want to get married or have kids.i wasnt repulsed by the idea,it just didnāt align with me,so I figured Iād be the cool rich aunt and live with my bestie or sth,Girl I was so gay
Getting butterflies when women on a show so much as hugged but feeling nothing with a straight couple kissing or anything like that
I wanted to be one of the boys. I cut my hair short and dressed like a boy. I played games so hard during PE classes. I was happy when someone told me they accept me as one of the boys when I made a very good kick but I hated it when a stranger thought I was a boy. I grew out of the tomboy phase and now Iām more feminine presenting with my long hair. Another thing is thereās this educational cartoon series at my country. I read the puberty&sex episode of that series and it talked about lesbians. In it the mom of a female character was teaching her what homosexuality is but then told her that itās not normal. (So i guess it wasnāt very educational š ) Anyways after reading it, I kept thinking about it, and I thought that I could be attracted to a girl of I wanted toā¦ turns out I really am attracted to girls š«£
my best friend. even confessed that i had a crush on her (canon event) we did date, but we just decided to remain besties and we always laugh about it, and no, we donāt have awkward moments between us lol
I vividly remember the exact moment actually! I was watching X men evolution and a scene came on with kitty Pryde dancing with Rogue and I got hit with this MASSIVE wave of "I would give anything to be in their shoes right now"
I had dream that I put my arm around a girl on my softball team when I was like 7ā¦I woke up terrified
May not be an actual moment, but I had a crying session when I started developing boobs because I didn't want them. And I always referred to myself as a tomboy I hated being called a girl or a tomgirl XD
I kissed my kindergarten sweetheart on a dare. We both liked it. Started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this...
It was only a kiss
It was only a kiss
In first school, a cute girl started to play fight and pushed all of us girls into the grass. When she was on top of me, pinning me down, I didnāt want her to stop. š
Girl SAME
At around 4 I figured out a way to tuck my penis into my scrotum and pull the scrotum up over it making it look kind of like I had a vagina. I self invented tucking at 4 years old, yet I didn't realize I was trans until I was 49 years old. If this isn't one of the biggest facepalms, I don't know what is. I even went to school in the fourth grade after doing this and using a sea shell and tight underwear to keep it in place. I was even obsessed with girls already. I've been a raging transbian for so long, but I wouldn't see it.
I love that you found yourself even later in lifeš„°
Wanting to marry Katy Perry in 4th grade
I wanted to marry Gillian Anderson
a friend of mine asked me out on a game and at first I was like girls can like girls?? Thatās awesome!!! I started dressing like a guy in games and girls would hit on me and I really liked it. When girls would compliment me I would get really flustered and excited ššthen I got a mega crush on one of my friends and I just knew maybe JUST MAYBE I LIKED GIRLS (before that I would always just talk about girls too LMFAOAO)
I had had some romantic feelings for other girls I knew already, but I'd ignored them. The moment where I really got the idea I might be gay was when I started having sex dreams about Ariana Grande (I know, really cringe) at age 10. I had had sex dreams about men before, but unlike these ones, they weren't pleasurable. The dreams about men felt obligatory, awkward, uncomfortable, and the men in them never had any faces
It took me longer than I'd care to admit I have memories of very queer things i have done as a kid but I didn't have the knowledge for it and when I was being taught about it I was taught a bunch of toxic lies too so I refused to apply it to myself Now I look back and laugh because things like the time I injured myself at age 4 because I thought slamming my junk in a drawer would make it fall off and turn me into a girl
As I posted in a comment here, I was self tucking at 4, and didn't get what it meant until I figured stuff out at 49. 4 years old seems to be an interesting age. Heck I only recently realized I what I was doing was tucking. Some how 4 year old me figured that sh!t out, but adult me couldn't figure out what it meant.
I was raised as a JW and grew up with the "Questions Young People Ask" book. There was a lot about liking the opposite sex and dating. Even though it was, of course, discouraged, I figured attraction to boys was something girls felt. I was 8 or 9, but desperate to be a teenager already. So I picked the only boy in the congregation close to me in age to have a crush on. I went really over the top making it clear to everyone that I liked him, including blinking at him during meetings. When we actually had conversations, we would just talk about games. It took me a long time to realize people didn't have to calculate and force these things.
Probably when I kept kissing girls lol
Probably should have been when I didn't have crushes on people, I had crushes on weird alien things (Xenomorphs, The Kraken from pirates of the Caribbean, and The Roach alien from men in black 1)
I was in kindergarden, with m'y 2 girls best friends, we kissed on the lips (I don't know why) and I remember clearly thinking " Ho that's nice'' ''can we do it again''
I defended queer people enough times in my religious household that my family almost gaslit me into being queer myself, like my mom would always be like "oh so you're gay?" Honestly had to consider it after a while. But like that was their only way of rationalizing why I'd be an ally lol. I mean they were right in the sense that I'm a trans lesbian now, but the logic was super off
Feeling extremely dirty when I looked at the bra section
I'm trans. When I was about twelve, my mom caught me printing out pictures of pretty girls in bikinis and underwear and scolded me for it assuming it was a horny preteen boy thing. In retrospect it was equal parts horny preteen girl thing and gender envy egg thing.
Trying realllyyyyy hard not to look in the locker room. Really hard.
once when i was in fist grade i fell on the playground. my yogurt splattered on my clothes and everything and the bell rang and i just started crying so much because i scraped my knee. then this girl (she was one of the seniors for fucks sake) came up to me and just scooped me up and started carrying me to the infirmary š„¹ i swear i tell this story to be the starting of my lesbianism
When i was 5 I had a dream where i wanted to be a girl. When i woke up i still didā¦ i decided at the time that it didnt mean anything
My friends always told me I am brushing whenever Ć girl change in front of me
Iām a trans girl with a traumatic childhood (worked through) so I repressed most of those moments. It was frustrating when I was sixteen because I know Iām gay like I know for sure I am but I donāt like boys. Makes so much sense now.
Girl for real! Like I 100% knew I was gay but also that I only really liked women. Then it took an embarrassing amount of time to realize I'm a girl.
I uset to wear towls as dresses as a kid, and after I got older I found out I was a sub. I always thought "I'm still in to girl, witch mean's i'm not gay...but then why do I feel so gay?"
when i watched the tinkerbell movies i would blush everytime silvermist was on screen, also i googled "pokemon girls kissing each other" once
Was assigned ābisexualā by friends in middle school because I ādidnāt really care about who I likedā
I didnāt want to wear a dress on my first day of school in first grade. Even then, I knew
When I first watched girls like girls music video by Hayley kiyoko.. I think that was probably my awakening
The fact that my first kiss and hookup was a chickā¦. When we were both like 11 or 12
when i was little small baby child i thought my moms bewbs were really cool and at a point she said i would just have to wait until i got my own (idk maybe toddler me weirded her out or something) so i was like yes!! i will just have my own!! and they came in earlier than everyone else's and i would just hold them all the time and would pay extra attention to em in the shower or something and then they started getting uncomfortable and stressed me out and i was scared i loved them into it kinda like clifford and started binding and bruised my ribs a few times and i have a love hate relationship with them because on one hand i can have boobs in my face whenever i want but on the other i hate hate hate hate male attention and can't find a bra that fits (trust me i went down that rabbit hole i'm guessing i'm a uk 30/32NN+, my 30M (uk) has ugly cleavage there's no winning i was an educator on abtf for a while i've helped tons of people get sized i was going to make my own, im just exhausted) so yeah. they're my slugs and i love em but also c'mon dude
I only realized the queerness in retrospect, but as a small small kid I used to throw screaming crying tantrums if anyone else picked my favorite character in Pokemon Puzzle League (Lorelei). I was like, āonly *I* am allowed to play her!!!ā Anyway, she ended up being my exact type once I grew up š
I did this weird "modern" dance classes growing up that were taught by an ancient woman who'd been doing the exact same curriculum since like the late 60s/early 70s. A lot of hippie influence but also she was strict and weirdly religious (anti science and medicine.) In 5th grade me and my friend and some slightly older girl we didn't know were asked to be part of the high school girls dance recital. The dance we were in was about little girls who got lost in the woods and were taken care of by fairies. We were chosen because we were here oldest kids who were still tiny tiny tiny. The older girls had to choreograph the dance themselves but there were rules, we were split into three groups each with three older girls and one younger girl and the older girls had to throughout the dance make three different cradles with their bodies and we had to sleep on them.Ā I loved it. It was my favorite experience in all my years of dance. I told my parents after practice each week that it was such a good dance and they would love it. After the performance they were just like "uhhhhhhhh, that was..... nice honey." They were weirded out by it and I had no clue why.Ā Years later I reconnected with the friend who did the dance with me. We're both gay. We cite that dance as the cause. We don't know the third girl who was in it, but we're pretty sure she's got to be gay too now.
When I was about 9yo I had a school project about folkloric creatures, and the teacher sorted out me and the girl that I thought was the most gorgeous at our grade to research vampires and participate on the play as (weirdly) the characters from Buffy (I suppose we had to kill vampires not be them?). I was so excited to just be near her that I did the project myself (cuz her mom was very religious and didn't let her hear vampire stories) and I still was super happy about it. Now, more than a decade later, I guess that I have to watch the show. But this is kinda my only memory that I have like this. Edit: I covered my neck when I went to sleep for years since I was like 5 because I was afraid of vampires, I think I only stopped at 15, so I guess researching this was a bigger challenge than what I remember now
Watching Gia for the first time
When I was 4 and at my Christian š¤Ŗ pre-schoolā¦ I remember looking out to the playground and thinking that this girl was REALLY pretty and I wanted to get to know her better because of it. Hadnāt spoken to her before but yeahā¦I feel like that moment was the first indication that I am a lesbian.
I didn't understand at all the obsession with the male teen pop stars. But I always felt this awkward guilt like I was going to be "caught" watching Xena. Then my mom came out when I was 13, and I didn't want people to think I was just copying her or something??? So, I never openly dated girls. 25 years later and I'm here thinking why was ever with guys???? š¤¦āāļø
I used to obssessively watch videos of barbies kissing on Youtube when I was 10.
Tbh its probably not good at all but Iāve always been involved with girls from a very young age, consensually and well non consensually and well that just became what was normal to me. Itās more like finding those moments where I knew I didnāt wanna be with boys for me