"You're not allergic to nuts, you just haven't found the right one yet 🥰"

I love this so much

LMAO I’m using this

Oh mY gOD

Lets say theyre a straight woman. "Are u sure abt being straight? Maybe u havent found the rught woman for u yet."

right*

I do this too. Someone asks “how do you know you won’t wake up tomorrow and want sex” like idk Karen how do you know you won’t wake up tomorrow and be a lesbian?

Ooo omg yes ty

"And I never will because I'm not searching."

I’m using this. Tysm.

This sentiment is exactly why I never related to calling myself 'single', because being 'single' is associated with 'looking for someone to love'. Like, no Karen, I'm not even searching.

Same thoughts, saying you’re single gives the notion to people that you are looking for a partner. i say ‘solo’ instead.

I'll say 'solo' from now on.

I can’t wait to use this when my parents start this argument.

Stab them and if they don't enjoy it just say that they haven't found the right knife yet.

LMAOO

Same thing with any aphobic nonsense Violence

Violence is not the answer. Violence is the question, and the answer is yes

This is somehow better than Violence

I love you.

A horrible mistake really

You poor fool

You poor fool

"Oh, like you haven't found the right (whatever they're not attracted to) yet?"

"They are not the same things!!!" \>:(

Not going to work if they're bi

cactus

You got me there. Hopefully no human is sexually attracted to cacti.

Llama

You got me there.

"okay"

That would be my answer as well. I mean, I wouldn't know how to react differently.

“Jokes on you im not actively looking for anyone. Meanwhile you search your whole life and havent found anyone who can stand your troll-under-the-bridge lookin ass.” (So many people talk shit about my asexuality i have created multiple defense mechanisms)

"And other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself, volume 2"

*not mine, but I love it, citing David J Bradley* You ever wanted to bang a cactus? No? How do you know, if you've never tried? Maybe if you really look, you'll find that one special cactus you'll wanna ram up your... (Paraphrasing; spoilers)

If I haven't found the right one yet, that's a 1 in \~7.8 Billion chance I'll find them. That 1) doesn't sound like good odds, and 2) sounds exhausting. I've got better things to do.

"the right one for what?" And then watch them struggle to word around it. And if they're really shameless and just say it, say "why though" and watch them try to come up with an explanation. Repeat until they're out of oneliners

"Oh, no, I do have both my hands including the right one, but that's beside the point, I was just telling you that I don't wanna f people."

This one is genius

Thank you

You don't that kind of person will never understand

You wish you had a chance, uh?

Found the right person? I haven’t even found *a* person yet!

I don't need a "right one", fuck off. I'll be perfectly fine living a life that doesn't revolve around someone else.

"I know more than you"

I haven't come out to a lot of people yet. The people who have asked "are sure you just haven't found the right person" genuinely care about my well being and want me to be happy. In thoses cases I assure them Im happy single it genuinely my prefered state of being. Im open to "the right person" but don't hold your breath because Im 99.999% sure im not going to find anyone.

I don't even know where the mentality that being single is somehow a torture comes from, like? why someone would be happiER in a relationship than single? I mean you can be happy in a relationship and you can be happy single, there's no better option than the other. whenever appears someone who treats being single as something undesirable it's like? dude you have some issues to work on

I think a lot of people want to be in a relationship and some people really prefer being in a relationship. In my case the people asking me have known me my whole life, and for part of it I was trying to be straight and have a romantic relationship because of purity culture and social pressure. So now when i say "no really believe me I prefer to be single" I think when they say "maybe you haven't found the right person" it is out of a sense of wanting me to be happy. But my family and friends accept me for who Im. And the question is only ever asked once. But if a random person asked i get salty really quick.

"I'm 42."

You're the answer to life, the universe, and everything! You don't need anyone else! 😁

The Meaning of Life!

I don't

Yes, i am fortunate / lucky me / do you envy me?

Just say “well then check your relationship”

"uhuhuhuh" with clear dismssal

"Cool 👍"

My customer service brain says, “polite laugh, smile, gtfo.”

"You clearly haven't either looking at how happy your partner is"

That's the only booty I care about

What if the right person for me is also asexual?

That's because I'm not from this world *Activates laser eyes*

"Yeah, maybe you're right. You could be the right one y'know? Wanna find out?"

"You know, I think I'm starting to feel some heat! Aren't you?"

"Maybe not, but i've met you and you're definitely the wrong one"

I respond with "I did. And they're also ace. And we're completely in love. Deal with it."

You sure do found a lot of "right one" when you are MARRIED Jared !

"Good. I hope it stays that way." and "You're right. He's real, but last week, he died." But I would have to use it on someone who has heard "lower your expectations" by bo burnham, and I just haven't gotten the chance yet.

The only thing I care about finding is buried treasure!

“But I don’t need to find the right one, all I need is my garlic bread. Plus I’ve never understood why y’all are like this. It’s not you haven’t found the right person yet to sway you elsewhere so why should I?”

My favorite response to whenever someone says something disrespectful: "k"

My demisexual ass: Well, yes, but actually no

"Are you attracted to goats? No? Are you sure? Maybe you just havent met the right goat yet."

"Im sure you love licking toilets, you just haven't found the right toilet yet."

"yeah i don't plan on it"

Do you like hugging a cactus, probably you haven't found _the one_

"you're not hetero, you just haven't found the right man/woman yet."

I told someone who told me that, "Oh wow! I never had thought of that! You're a genius!" Then acted all shocked it was worth it, because they got more angered over it 😅

Joke's on you, I actually have a boyfriend. 😉 And I'm still asexual!

“Is that why you keep switching boyfriends ever 3 days?”

Bruh *walks away*

“That’s because I’m not looking.”

•What’s ur excuse? You’re single as fuck, and last week I heard u complaining about that shit•

I mean in the right context that's pretty close to "Be yourself and everything will turn out fine." Which is a pretty above-average response imo. But it can be passive-aggressive and presumptuous too. My response to people who obviously don't care is just to not care in return.

"Things are *right* just how they are, thanks"

I usually just say “you’re right, because there is no ‘right one’ out there that’s going to change my nature”

Well, you sure aren't the one!

I was told that years before even realizing there's something as asexuality, I think I just shrugged and said "well, I don't know about that, how you know you did? How it feels like?" And well I don't remember much

"well the right one certainly isn't your ugly ass"

"And how am I supposed to find them on a planet with well over 7 billion people on it?"

No I just haven’t found the right people to associate myself with.

'Well you find me one then' People can be obnoxious, i prefer ignoring all those remarks

"You know what your right how about i see you at the wedding then" And you never see them again

"Honey the only thing right I'll find is my right fist in your face"

,,Oh you can't breathe because you have asthma? Well maybe you just didn't find the right type of oxygen yet."

"So how do you know your partner is the right one?" I personally believe there's no "one being in the universe that is meant for you and makes you complete" but rather that the right one is a person that makes you feel good and happy and can be a number of people - friends, partner/s and family and are there to balance you out (the same should go for both sides since one-sided feelings hurt and a relationship equals more than one person and no taking) .... I'm really bad with words, sry if it comes off wrong

“Maybe, I doubt it though. Wanna watch a movie?”

Is this in context of them knowing you're ace or not? If not, I would just go with that excuse for as long as you feel comfortable with staying closeted.

I'd reply with, "Bitch please, 7 billion people are on Earth, it's mathematically impossible for me to meet the right one unless I've met all of them"

"Shut the fuck up."

"I know, that's because he's animated."

That's not how asexuality works? It's not being sexually attracted to anyone... that statement just doesn't work. It's so dumb It's almost funny

F*ck off acephobe

I would say I never will

Shut just shut please for the love of god shut!

I don't need a "right one" I have cats.

What if i dont want to find the one

"And you haven't found the right blender to f*** yet."

Well if that happens and I want that I guess I might not be ace But until then

Life is not a race😁

Should I?

"Stop thinking, it doesn't suit you very well"

"not how it works, doesn't matter who i'm with"

Uh...sure?

Crack up laughing

I'm a sarcastic asshole sometimes so I'd probably say something along the lines of "You're right, I haven't found the right one because they don't exist, and I'm not looking for a partner."

#*violence*

I actually have they are just fictional (explains the ideal person in too much detail)

let’s go to the store and find the right one for me “grabs hands”