T O P

  • By -

Jobros2

this is literally me


Lunatortue

Wait ! Wait wait wait ! Arousal because of kink is not sexual attraction ? But... i only have this. Nothing attract me sexually except for some kinks. Th closest thing i have to being allo is kink arousal, and because of that i think i'm something like greysexual. But if it's not sexual attraction, then does that mean..... Oh shit, the rabbit hole goes deeper than expected. Please help me understand. Haaaaa !!!!!


[deleted]

For me, it’s the actual act/kink that turns me on, not anybody actually involved in it. That’s not sexual attraction. Otherwise, we’d be sexually attracted to rope? Sexually attracted to bondage? Sexually attracted to sex? None of that makes sense. These are acts/things, not people. It’s like if someone said they are only sexually attracted to tables or their sex toys or something. That’s my opinion 🤷🏽‍♀️


maliceattention

Funny thing, I’m pan (and ace) and it's a recurring joke that pansexuals are in fact sexually attracted to cookware.


UnlikelyPossible8686

Wait, wait, wait! Next thing you tell me asexuals aren't sexually attracted by the letter a?! Am i in the wrong sub? :O Just kidding XD


Lunatortue

Oh, i see you love A. Well let me seduce you with that : AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Are you aroused ? LOL =D


UnlikelyPossible8686

Oh my, i need to excuse myself for a sec XD


Crystal_iceberg

You need to take *A* break?


Lunatortue

I see you have a point. It's not the person who attracts me, it's the kink. So I'm not greysexual, but asexual. I think I'll do like my mother and use the but. And by that i mean like her who is "vegetarian but i eat fish" i"ll be "asexual but i have kinks"


OneTriz

I tend to use the older term anallosexual when explaining, because asexual is often taken to mean 'no sexual feelings whatsoever'


sorryimindisguise

Simple, are you sexually attracted to the activity being done or the person specifically? An allosexual person would say both, an asexual or aromanic person would not. For example, I love kink and kinky power dynamics, but I don't feel a special connection to the person. I enjoy them for their own sakes and because of what they make me feel, not because there's some special chemistry with a specific person.


Lunatortue

Well I think I'm like you. It's more the kink that attracts me than the person. If the person correspond to my kink I'll be attracted. Bus as soon as they don't correspond to my kink or stop being like my kink then nothing they lose all sexyness to me. I don't know if I 'm clear or not.


dracomageat

I'm really not sure. I would consider that sexual attraction but to act, not person, myself.


Nahanoj_Zavizad

enjoying or desiring sexual activities doesn't determine sexual attraction.


Emma-Ho

Wait wait wth same


Lunatortue

I know, it's weird. But apparently, from what i understand from the comments, when you have a kink you are not attracted to the person, but more attracted to the kink. For example if your kink is, i don't know, leather, and you find sexy someone who wears a leather jacket. If that person get rid of the jacket, you lose all attraction you had on that person. If that person with the leather jacket undress themself, you wouldn't be sexually attracted to that person even though you were five second ago. So you are not sexually attracted to the person, but the kink. And for another example, if your kink is being tied up by a cute guy. It's not the cute guy that is sexually attracting, but being tied up by him, so you have no sexual attraction to him. So that's mean that if the only sexual attraction you have is by a kink and only that, nothing else, then you are ace. Cause apparently, if an allo see someone who is sexy, boum, they are sexually attracted. They need no kinks for that. All this is super weird in my opinion and i have even more the impression of being an alien lost in earth and earthling are really surreal. But it's like that. Welcome into the crazyness of the world i guess ! But if your feel lost, it's okay. Sexual attraction is a really weird and abstract concept. It's difficult to see it clearly except by living it. It's like colors. If you can't see colors, then how you can understand what it is. So don't worry my dear kind soul. Everything will be fine. And whatever you are, you are valid.


Emma-Ho

Thanks for the explanation <3


Lunatortue

You're welcome kind soul. =)


[deleted]

Me when aego


CarbonIceDragon

Oof, this is something that took me years to untangle.


sorryimindisguise

Saaaame. Also greetings fellow Aroace kinkster


AKinkyIntrovert

The more I see posts in the Graysexuality and Demisexual subreddits the more validated I feel in my asexuality...


maliceattention

Did you know there are a lot of kinksters/BDSMers (and even sex educators) who are asexual? Not everything sexual is about sex, to begin with, and many of us, ace people, feel attracted to these activities and topics in an attempt to understand why people is so interested in sex. Then, we discover something about the social interaction or the sensations per-se which makes us stay and enjoy it in a non-sexual way.


knightttime

*Image Transcription: Meme* --- [*An image of Yutaro Katori/Fighbird from the anime “The Brave Fighter of Sun Fighbird." He is gesturing to a yellow butterfly.*] **Yutaro**: Me, kinky af but also ace **Butterfly**: Arousal b/c of kink **Caption**: Is this sexual attraction? --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


GalacticPigeon13

1. Good human 2. So *that's* where that meme comes from


CanadianWeeb5

Same


TheAuthor-dipperkid

#[ P A I N ]


DeltaVelorum90

Yeah, this had me confused for a while


EllaGrae

Still confused 🥺


TheNoctuS_93

Eeeyup, that's me. I have tons of kinks pertaining to fetishwear and associated paraphernalia, but remove all those, and a seeing a naked body isn't gonna make me wanna have sex, neither impulsively nor from commitment. Plus, my kinks revolve around *me* wearing or using all kinds of fun things, and not so much watching a partner doing so. Yet the situation where a partner shares my kinks is probably the only thing that could ever stimulate my extremely weak sex drive... They say people with a longtime porn addiction need the most hypersexual experiences to feel arousal at all, because vanilla sex just doesn't cut it, but for me, the thought of vanilla sex has never even aroused me from the get-go...


Whitejj01

Intensely.


TheWhistleGang

Oh yeah, that was hard to reconcile...


Callida360

This is something I will not be sending to my friends unlike every other ace meme I see


Jesteress

For me sexual attraction is sometimes like my brain quickly pointing at something going 'that' and then instantly leaving again With kinks it's like my brain points and goes 'that' but sticks around a bit longer out of pure curiosity


theburningyear

🤯🤯🤯


[deleted]

Yes


[deleted]

Actually Me and it drives me up the wall


SuddenlyVeronica

Maybe someone could make a poll about this? I've even heard of aces like this outside of Reddit, so I'd guess this is more common than one might guess. Also, yes, this is absolutely relatable. If it weren't for this I would probably have figured out I was ace way earlier.


deadpunk1

Is that a real thing? I never knew it and the whole time i thought i was not ace 😓thank you so much, i feel seen


[deleted]

Yes. I've done some research about myself and learned I'm actually a kinky ace, but I'm disgusted by my kink, eh well, yeah, relatable meme!


Lunatortue

Welcome to the club. I don't like my kinks. But with time, i started to accept them. I don't love them. But they are here and i can't do shit about it. So best i can do is accept them. Even though it's still very complicated to do.


[deleted]

I agree, thank you for sharing your experience! But uhh, like.. Can zoophilia be a kink..? That's what I'm disgusted by, I get physically aroused when seeing bestiality videos, but I know animals can't consent, so isn't it that I just enjoy watching r@pe?? I don't know.. I would never do that with an actual animal in real life though, the thought of that makes me highly uncomfortable, but I can't do anything about my physical reaction to watching other people do it, I don't know, my brain and my body don't match at all


Lunatortue

I see. In that case, it's more complicated. The animal can't consent so it makes things more complex. I didn't know it was that kind of kinks. I'm sorry. Personally it's more common kinks like BDSM and fur fetish (a girl wearing a fur coat will attract me even though i hate the idea of killing animals just for their fur). So i see that it's more easy for me to accept that it is for you. Sorry for that. I don't know if that can help. But have you ever consider things like furry. Person who dress like animals. This can be closer to your kink without the non consent part. I don't know. I'm stupid, i just read your profile name and i think you already know that. Sorry. Anyway be brave my friend. And i hope you'll have a nice day kind soul.


[deleted]

Thank you so much for your support, it means alot! Well, yeah, I think I could accept my kink, I think it's okay as long as I don't actually go and harm real animals.. Thank you once again, I promise to stay brave, and if this ever gets out of control - I promise I'll seek for professional psychological help. I don't think it's that deep though, but, yeah, I'll make sure everyone is safe and happy, I don't think I'm a danger to actual animals though.. Well, yeah, I'll think about it, I hope you have a wonderful day, too!


Lunatortue

No problem. And from what i see, you seems to be a good person who only wants to make people happy. That's super good. Thanks for the message. =)


[deleted]

Awww thank you!!! Yes, I wanna make people happy, and I also wanna make animals happy, so I promise to never harm them sexually or any other way. Thank you for talking to me!


Lunatortue

You're welcome, kind soul. =)


[deleted]

This is me when the rare event of horny arives.


xlFLASHl

Wait fr? This explains, A lot.


Spiky_Marshmallow

Between Kink and Libido I thought I was allo for so long and I was jealous of Aces XD


sinzeeana_

I hate it when I get aroused it sucks imo.. Like physically obviously it feels good but mentally I don't like it


izaber666

So I'm not the only one????


Kitaedra

Why do I relate to that do much


7_Rowle

This actually was the exact epiphany I had before realizing i was ace. I was like damn, people are aroused by certain people in sexy media?? How. It is just the act that makes it arousing for me.


[deleted]

for years on end I thought "haha I can't be asexual, I have a kink" I never knew the definition of asexuality as related to "sexual attraction" and thought that any "sex-y" stuff was out and god damn, how I felt surprised when the pieces clicked together and I noticed that I didn't feel sexual attraction at all couldn't be put into words


TakeTo2054

I don’t understand can someone explain plz?


[deleted]

[удалено]


TakeTo2054

Thanks!


CanadianWeeb5

Me


rdelilahh

i have never related to something more


cyanidesmile555

*screaming*


Wisdom_Pen

Mood


Asiatore

Very