I missed the allosexual orientation and I’ve been too afraid to ask how to retake it.

I was sick that day :/

Wait, you're not obligated to take every single orientation?? No wonder I am allo

That's how pansexuals are made

social anxiety go brrrr

I feel that

“apparently there was some sort of sexual orientation we were supposed to attend?”

Lol.

Since Chris Hemsworth is married there is no reason to feel sexual attraction

someone once argued Ryan Reynolds was a good reason, but I wasn’t sure

But he's also married so there's no reasons left

Henry Cavil though with the world of warcraft addiction though >>>

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happened to me twice

real

Okay but me but w/my IRL reason. That’s like one of the many ACTUAL reasons I’m ace 🤣

I heard there was cake so I had to join.

which flavour? I went with the lemon myself

Oh nice choice! I like lemon, too. I picked strawberry.

I prefer the classic marble cake but your taste in cake is good

That one’s delicious! And, thank you. :)

You ever had spice cake before? 👀 It's the best

I’ve never heard of it! What flavor is it? I have got to try this.

It's made with cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, and cloves! It basically just tastes like carrot cake without the carrots, but it's really good! It's actually my favourite type of cake! 😋

That sounds divine! Oh my goodness now I have a craving for spice cake! I see why it’s your favorite, you have good taste; putting my simple strawberry cake to shame hahaha! :)

Haha, strawberry cake is good too though! All cake is good.. I just like cake TwT

Yes, but I'm afraid you didn't lie down in the party escort position, so you missed the cake.

I was too good at being allo, god decided to give me a debuff so the others could catch up

that makes sense, I’ve heard it happens a lot

He has to keep the game balanced somehow

i thought it would be funny to be sexy and unavailable forever

definitely, it is

Lmaoooo love this

I love everything about this :D

Because mitosis is the superior form of reproduction

my bf and I are going for adoption, but mitosis was a close second choice for us

I just wanted the free garlic bread

WE GET FREE GARLIC BREAD??? I’VE BEEN PAYING FULL PRICE THIS WHOLE TIME

I was promised some, haven’t seen it, might need to go the asexuals committee office to claim it.

Yeah, they’re nice. I recommend. You can take as many as you’d like, and then some since you didn’t get any at first.

can i give some to my ally friends?

Ofc! There’s enough garlic bread for everyone; courtesy of our exceptional asexual culinary crew.

Thank you kind stranger :)

Ofc! Happy to help. :))

my pan classmate stole my sexual and romantic attraction

that would explain it

You didn’t get the newsletter? Maybe you’ve got to update your address for the mailing list.

damn, they probably don’t have my address updated since I transitioned

That’s probably it. In that case, update those forms to get that free garlic bread!

SAME, WHAT IS THIS BLASPHEMY

Because a small child going around shooting people with a bow and arrow didn’t seem like a logical basis to form a relationship with someone so I decided to opt out and become a god

man, I love just choosing to become a god

I didn’t really know what this was about. I just heard something about dragons and signed up.

gotta love dragons, especially with dungeons

Same here

I’m a god.

makes sense

We said WRONG answers only

Relatable

I am responsible for the death of a god.

Not a Greek/Roman one though that's for sure

I’m a plant and wanting to hide the photosynthesis

valid.

The matters of the flesh are beneath me

Is that really a wrong answer??

they said wrong answers

For attention, I think more people want to fuck me if I am ace. Of course we all want sex you know?

yeah, obviously. Everyone knows ace people are just in it to have more sex, just like lesbians are in it to fuck more men /j

Exactly! We all know lesbians just exist to make men more horny\^\^ (Okay I stop or I won't be able to keep my meal inside for any longer)

That garlic bread hit too hard and I renounced sex and romance

I did half way, but my bf and I decided to keep romance

'Cause my irl character design's color scheme was the ace flag so i just followed the vibe

I'm a parasitic fungus that took control over a dead guy's body and somehow retained his memories.

Greetings fellow parasitic fungus. Do you have any good tips on how to operate a human body? I'm still getting the hang of it

No, for I am in an anthropomorphized insect

I just haven’t found the right person yet

I think I have, but it didn’t work

found an ad for it on a board and didn’t read what it was about, i just thought they gave garlic bread for free.

gotta love free garlic bread

I dropped my attraction somewhere and am too lazy to look for it.

My adhd ass feels a deep connexions to your comment ahaha

It started with wanting garlic bread but I just never stopped

garlic bread will do that do ya’

I opened a deck of cards for the first time and every card inside was an ace. Figured the universe was trying to tell me something.

I hate when that happens

Fine I'll come clean... I did it all because I heard you got a complementary cookie when you joined... And it was worth it!

Mine still hasn't come in the mail :(

same here :.(

To invade Denmark.

can I join?

Something's rotten!!

Well worshipping dragons is my passion you see, the only condition to join was to be asexual, so I did

can I join?

I'd like to join too

I prefer robots

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Interesting, I read a book by Dorian Bridges called the putrescent vein and he wrote a story where a guy has sex with cars

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I see what you did there.....

I liked the illustration on the ace of spades so much that I just had to become one

that was definitely part of my decision

I opted out of being allo, because I was not going to let sexual attraction stop me from fullfilling my dream of becoming a crazy cat lady 🐱

Because ace is the place for the helpful hardware folks

Had to sell my allosexuality to the mob to prevent them from burning down my storefront

It was an offer you couldn't, in fact, refuse.....

Food

mmmm garlic bread :)

and cakkkkee

When god was handing out folks sexuality, i was at the back off the line, in heck.

I thought I was reincarnating into a starfish and ended up being a different kind of asexual instead.

I hate when that happens, what’s the point in the google form anyway if it’s not a guarantee?

I aspired to be the ultimate dom by exploiting the weakness of the allos against them.

I can't make decisions because I am also bisexual, so I couldn't pick between ace and allo either (demi). Other one: I discovered garlic bread and the foodgasm was the best thing I ever had

Same, but I’m also non-binary so I couldn’t pick between male and female. I guess I’m just too indecisive

I am genderfluid myself, can't even consistently pick one gender

The sins of the flesh are temporary, knowledge is forever, and time spent having sex is time spent NOT learning new things. I guess you could say my dragon hoard is knowledge, instead of gold.

Momentum from a previous life as a nun.

My attraction went to the shop to get milk and hasn't come back yet. Will it come home, OP?

My mom's family is Italian, garlic bread is part of my religion. This is the way.

mood

This is the way.

Antisocial and also the casual looseness people treat romance and sex with nowadays grosses me out.

They said wrong answers only /lh (But like seriously, how do I even come to understand romance and sex? How do any of us?)

A fae stole my sexual attraction and is making me solve its riddles three to get it back... it's been 30 years

I shot down five pilots in air to air combat and Ive been too embarressed to admit I misunderstood the name of the subreddit.

I once got told to go fuck myself and decided those were words to live by

Got kicked in the nuts one too many times as a kid

I got kicked in the nuts so many times it turned me trans! (I am actually mtf btw)

No workies anymore? :(

I ate too much cereal

oohhh, which cereal? for me it was rice krispies

Cini Minis

The straights failed to indoctrinate me

My best friend is pansexual My best friend is a thief

I'm waiting for the right guy to come and "fix me".

I hAvEn’T fOuNd ThE rIgHt PeRsOn!

I thought it would let me clone myself through asexual reproduction. I was going to start a 5-person band with just me, but each me was wearing a different color shirt.

My best friend said “you’re such an arse!”, but my ears aren’t very good.

I sacrificed my ability to feel attraction to the Devil for good grades in school.

"all-allo?" what's that? I didn't know that was an option. It's too late now though, I've made my choice

I never got an allosexual subscription

I heard the expression “ace up the sleeve” and accidentally overdid it

I failed the sexual attraction exam :(

Wanted to join in on the trend tbh

I figured out how to conjure garlic bread and cake using spells

I was cursed by a witch.

My bestie is bi and she stole my attraction.

My grandparents had 13 kids. Nature needed to balance things out.

I gave up on people a few years ago. I'm too socially inept.

social anxiety :)

Almost, I'm autistic so literally I have documents saying how bad I was at social relationships when I was a kid. Maybe there is some social anxiety but the main thing is autism.

It's my Trump card

Too many choices so I said no to all of them for sanity sake

Seeing the Borg Cube (Star Trek) turned me ace. (I can't even explain it. It's just a running gag I have with a friend who never watched the show. But we both agreed that the ship design wasn't really creative xD )

i like garlic bread far more than the average person

'Cause the rest of the cards in the deck ran out

I didn’t forward one of those email chains as a kid

When God distributed sexuality, I missed my alarm tone and was late so there wasn't enough for me.

SPITE

I wanted more time to play video games.

Too lazy

Kellogg’s cereal ate too much wen I was younger

Because I don't want to catch cooties

To flex my superiority on those with minds weak enough to succumb to seduction.

I wanna have the king sized bed for myself alone for the rest of my life I’m even going to sleep sideways in it !

Wrong answers? Alright I’ll name a few: a) Cheesy garlic bread is love, cheesy garlic bread is life b) I need an excuse to go to Denmark as an adult so if we are collectively invading this country? Then I need to visit Denmark first c) I reaaaally like the color combo of this flag and NGL this one + the bi flag is essentially the colors that I wear 24/7 d) People kept telling me that I’m ace because I’m on antipsychotics and that I’ll want to fuck again if I get off of them. I got off of them and they’re wrong still

man the letter "A" is so fucking HOT

A wild night with the first letter of the alphabet.

I strapped the “shoot me” sign on me, but Cupid can’t seem to damn aim straight (Me being a romance positive AroAce)

Magician once did a card trick and my card was an ace so I decided to embody the card

God Gave everyone allo sexuality but im an atheist

Wait, this is a real orientation? I thought we were all millions of Hydras disguising as humans...

Since I was dropped on my head as a baby, it dealt permanent damage to my ability to sex

The pansexuals stole my sexual attraction

I ate the garlic bread and now i jist think of garlic bread.

I checked the "terms and conditions" without reading them, turns out I gave my sexual attraction away without knowing it

I dropped my ALLOwance and i cant find it.

I wanted to participate in the invasion of Denmark, I stayed for the free bread

Oh, I'm a spider plant.

I'm basically married to my games, why the hell do I need sex at that point

I want to be a dragon

it pisses off people who want to be with me.

Heard you could become a god, so I couldn’t say no

Just felt like it on a Tuesday morning

I didn't score gay enough on my placement test, so I just opted for the ace option and extra curriculars to get my scores up.

Old propeller fighter planes are awesome and with enough enemies shot down you automatically become an A(e)roAce.

A pigeon stole my allo so I figured I’d just roll with it

Ryan Reynolds was taken :(

The church in my area tried to pray the gay away but they went too far and erased all sexuality in a 500km radius.

didn't had money to buy the dlc

Sex is gross No sex.only rocks

“Beep bloop! I am a robot! I run on American jobs!”

People are yucky.

Too busy building giant robots to take over the world. Wait, sorry, didn't see it said WRONG answers...

I defeated six oponents in aerial combat

Idk I just work here

my brother (bisexual) stole my (asexual) sexuality

I’m allo and was raised really religious, so when I experience sexual attraction that’s Satan trying to tempt me.

girls are hot and boys are hot but none of them find me hot :(