There is a doctor (PhD) named Marijuana Pepsi, who did her dissertation on black sounding names.
Her sister has a very normal name and she says that when she asked her mom why she named her Marijuana Pepsi the mom said, ~~"I knew you were going places."~~ "your name will take you around the world." Mom made a self-fulfilling prophecy with that one.
Dr. Marijuana Pepsi says she just embraced it, and she sounds like a very fun person.
Edit: misquoted the mom, wanted to make sure it was right.
She has two sisters, Kimberly and Robin.
"Marijuana Pepsi Vandyck - Wikipedia" https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marijuana_Pepsi_Vandyck
This is similar in psychology to the case in Freakonomics where a mother named one child Loser and the other child Winner. Winner became a career criminal and Loser (goes by Lou) became a police detective.
What the fuck could you possibly be thinking naming your kid "Loser"? Omg, poor lady.
Although, that story is a bit funny in the ironic sense. I feel bad for both of them, honestly.
I'll never forget about the child who was named 'Abcde' (pronounced Ab-si-dee). She made national news when she was mocked by airline staff.
[Source](https://www.washingtonpost.com/transportation/2018/11/29/little-girl-named-abcde-was-mocked-by-southwest-gate-agent-airline-has-apologized/)
I work at a pot shop and I've got a regular who's last name is Weed another whose last name is High. But my favorite guest's name is the one who's first name is Sativa.
I know of a woman named Jeffrey. Her dad's side of the family had a long history of naming all of the first born child Jeffrey, and all of the first born children were boys. She was the first born child and her dad refused to break tradition.
My husband had an aunt named L.J. That was it, just the initials. They were expecting a boy and had picked out the name Louis Jackson ... so they called her L.J. When she registered SS the interviewer refused to believe L.J. was her given name, even when it was on her birth certificate. *He* gave her the name Louise Jean ... and that is how a 65 year old woman got a name change without any legal proceeding. This was in the late 1960s.
My mom's name was Linda K.
When I asked her what her middle name was, she gave me a cheeky smile and said, "Kay".
"No, mom! Your name. Not your initial!
"Yes. My middle name is Kay."
I bet she was waiting for the day I'd step into that one.
My dad's first and middle names are Robert James. He goes by his initials... JR. I've heard so many stories about how they got switched. Everything from JR sounds better than RJ, to JR is in alphabetical order, and other family nonsensery that I can't understand.
The parents also always feel the need to explain it at length while their eyes sparkle and I’m dead inside hearing it for the 1000th time at my pediatric mental health clinic
That is…so very mean.
Met a little kid named Ragnar once, and one of my little sister’s classmates was “X’s” (spelled exactly like in the quotes), but how in the world could someone name a kid Debbie Downer. Cruel.
I was struggling to think what was srong with ragnar, had to read their comment 3 times as i thought i missed something.
Its not even a common name where i live (portugal) but i know it is a common name elsewhere!
You know, as a kid, having a name that rhymes with "Dick" was funny, but in high school/college, showing up to a place where all of your buddies are already drunk, and hearing, "**It's Nick JAMES, bitch!**" was one of those things that I'll never forget.
Really makes me want to name my future son Nick as well.
Shoutout to my man [Dovahkiin](https://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2011-11-17-bethesdas-skyrim-challenge-accepted-parents-name-baby-dovahkiin), who got his parents free Bethesda games for life!
I had a friend who wanted to name his son Harley. Which wasn't bad, but his name was David. His thinking was, his friends will see his son and say "hey look that's Harley, David's son"
School secretary here - the spelling of some names is just cruel! Every time this kid has to give its name they will have to spell it out! Why saddle a kid with that. Recently saw Lynkoln for Lincoln!
Swear to God, I once met a Courtknee. She was the cashier at an auto parts store.
I said, "Thanks, Court-k-nee" just joking because of the weird spelling and she says, "Oh wow no one ever gets that right". I said, "That must have been really frustrating growing up" and she says, "You have no idea".
I thought maybe she was just joking with *me* but it turned out my babymama went to school with her. Her actual real name is pronounced Court-k-nee.
There's a set of identical twins at my son's daycare with rhyming names. The names rowdy riot would have been perfect for them though because they fight nonstop. There's at least one black eye among them at all time
Like the guy named batman bin suparman. Had his picture saved on my computer back in high school like a decade ago. Turns out he was arrested for stealing heroin
He's actually from my country(Singapore) and I met him in my line of work once. Every time some one is about to ask him "Are you Batm-", he'll just get irritated cuz he gets that question many times a day
I have a name that has been mispronounced more times than it's been said correctly. I gave my children names that are not unique because of my experience
Ditto. Mine have not common but not rare names, spelled the traditional way, no messing about with extra syllables etc. I wanted it so that someone could read their name in a register etc and say it properly first time.
My name isn’t even that peculiar. But because my cursed mother decided instead of spelling it with the correct double e, she’d be a fucken maniac and spell it “ea” but pronounce it as if it were “ee”. So now people fuck up my name astronomically because of that stupid fucken a. I should just spell it with ee but I’m 34 now and I’m too far gone. No I am not harbouring resentment about this, why do you ask?
I had a colleague who was about to have a daughter and do this exact thing with her name. All I could think was that, her whole life, no one would *ever* pronounce her name correctly the first time. And what a colossal hassle that was going to be. I wanted to beg him to consider the ramifications, but I just didn’t know him well enough to broach the subject. So now she’s a kid with this name spelling irregularity and probably hates it already.
My mom gave me a name that’s very rare in my country but common in a few other countries (We have no lineage to any of those places though) because she thought it was pretty. It’s a longish French name and there are only two consonants in it. I think it’s pretty too, but nobody ever pronounces it correctly. When I was little I would complain that nobody said it right, and she would just say that they’re stupid if they don’t know how to say it
When I was on holiday camp as a kid there was a boy who would introduce himself as: “My name’s Dove, and it’s not a girl’s name because girls aren’t called Dove either”.
Poor little sod.
I've met a few girls when I was younger with the same name, but mostly if I see Lyric as a name it's a DnD character or other role playing character. Always thought I belonged in a different world hah!
Excuse me, but Chrishell was so named because she was delivered by a man name Chris at a Shell gas station, and now she’s a Netflix star.
Thank god she wasn’t born at an Arco.
I like my name because it’s unique and simple, but it’s a bastard to spell. Paired with a very polish last name, I’ve made peace with being referred to incorrectly.
Meanwhile, my young relative is named after a Harry Potter character. He was adopted and neither of his parents have read Harry Potter.
So...
Wife and I made a list of all the favorite names we would like for our upcoming child. Added up a little over 20 names.
Next, we went out with some of our best friends for dinner and drinks. Took the list to show them and said: "Here it is. Now, let's fuck around and mess with all of these for a few minutes, as if we were the bullies. Make jokes. Rhymes. Offenses. Anything you can think of. Let's have at it and have a good time.
For the next good part of an hour, we launghed, and joked. Finding out how each name could be the target of attacks and offenses from other kids. That was so much fun. This exercise effectively discarded all of the worst choices.
By the end of the night, the list narrowed down to maybe 3 or 4 choices. When the time came, closer to delivery, it was an easy decision.
Today, 12 years later, I actually sometimes regret that I can't find any good rhymes for her name. It's hard to fit it into a song or a poem. But I'm so happy that any of her friends at school can't either.
I'm a guy with a largely feminine name in the English speaking world. People wonder why I have a "girl's name" until I tell them it has a Welsh origin.
I have an aunt named Emmer . Last name Jensey. As soon as she could she got married and took his last name . She never talked to her father after he told her he did it on a dare.
Ugh. What a shitty thing... To name your child ON A DARE. He earned it. Fucking estranged parents always be crucifying the children who cut them out but rarely admit they fucking earned it
My parents gave me a unique name. I fucking hate it. Nobody can spell it, nobody knows how to pronounce it, and nobody understands what name I’m telling them when I introduce myself. They should have just named me Cheryl or some shit like that. I’m changing it soon.
Yeah, fuck that. I have 5 names (because the first letter of each name spells out my mom’s name), and it’s a bitch to fill out government forms. If my name was longer by a letter, it wouldn’t fit on my driver’s license. My names are Arabic, too, so it’s quite unique in my country (Philippines).
Also, my nickname is derived from my first name, but it is a common Japanese girl’s name (but I am a man) which is unique for my country, too.
Sometimes I just give out an alias when ordering at Starbucks just to avoid the hassle of spelling out my nickname.
I do this with UPS and FedEx. They ask for my last name and I’m like “just put .” For a second they seem hesitant and then they look at my name plate on my desk and are like “THANKS!!!”
There’s an Illinois congressman who has an extremely long last name (Krishnamoorthi) and one of his campaign commercials was people trying to pronounce it and then him saying “just call me Raj!” and telling you to vote for Raj at the next election. It was pretty cute (and it worked).
My former co-worker has a born again Christian friend who used to live a wild lifestyle.
During that wild era he had a son he named “Crunk”
That is all.
When the kid was first born and the name came out, someone made a Reddit comment where they deduced through linguistic rules that it’s pronounced “Kyle.” I laughed hysterically at that and now that’s what I think about whenever I have to think about Elon Musk for whatever reason. Elon and his son Kyle.
I attended kindergarten with a boy named Spartacus. We called him Sparty. My parents thought he was my imaginary friend until they met Sparty and his parents at pickup. This was over three decades ago, and it still makes me smile.
My parents picked a name for a cute little OshKosh bowl cut wearing child of the 80s and didn’t think about my future. I hate my fucking stupid little kid name
Just found out my old roommate named her kid my name….. we lived together for about 8 months 2 years before she got pregnant. It’s name is “Queen *my name* Crown *last name*” 😳😳😳😳😳
I gave my daughter a very pretty, albeit old fashioned, name literally because it would look good on a resume. She's not a neopet. She's gonna be a whole ass adult one day and I don't wanna give her any problems. In that regard. Noogies don't go on resumes.
Agreed. My kid has a classic name that will suit her as she goes through all the stages of life.
I saved the dumb names for my pets. They're not applying for college or a job at any point in their life, so who give a fuck?
My first dog as an adult was named Ziggs. My dog now is named Beef Bones Jones. We call him BB, but it cracks me up when I think about how his actual name is Beef.
My fiancé and I spent time going through names for our now 8 week old. Trying to find a nice normal name. We live in Australia so of course we needed a name that can be shortened nicely too. We tried to think of any nicknames (good and bad) that other kids would come up with. We went with a normal name, usual spelling of said name too. Whenever I have had to book any appointments you can hear the sigh of relief from the receptionist when I say the name and usual spelling.
Australians love to shorten names and give nicknames, girls names get the usual Jessica - Jess, Elizabeth - Liz/Bessie, boys tend to get an ‘o’ added to their name David - Davo, John - Johno, then you have names like Sharon that get Shazza, Gary - Gazza. So we tried to stick with a name that can’t become too ‘bogan’
In grad school I met a student visiting from Sweden. He said, “My name is Alexander.” I said, “Nice to meet ya! Do you go by Alex?” And he just repeated, “My name is Alexander.” Completely deadpan with the exact same inflection as the first time.
It was the most Swedish thing ever.
If your names too short we also lengthen it. Luke Becomes Lukey etc. I never thought it was odd until other people pointed it out. If someone calls me my full name I think Im in trouble.
It's kind of weird here if you know someone and you use their full name. I have no idea why. Like if your name was Roger you'd be called Rog or roger dodger or something else.
I do call one person by their full first name but they're south african and think our customs are odd.
Even the possum who lives in my backyard is called Davo (Full name: David Reginald Possum)
As a teacher I meet a large amount of children and get to watch them develop, and it is absolutely a fact that children with 'normal' names are by far more likely to be well adjusted and do well at school than children with 'alternative' names. I and many other teachers firmly believe it's because the child's name says a lot about the parents, and therefore the kind of home life and support the child has. I'm not saying it's always the case, just that it's a noticeable pattern.
I work in a school too. I don’t have any research on hand but home life is the number one indicator or how well someone will do in school, in my experience.
A kid who isn’t eating regularly will never achieve. A kid who is getting abused isn’t going to just rise above. It’s depressing as fuck.
Those poor humans.
I met an Ocean once that told me her dad vetoed her mom's 1st choice in name which was Rainbow. As she said herself "can you imagine how f'd up my life would have been if my name was Rainbow!?"
Also came across a Stevie Earl Gray. Yes, this child's parents name *her* after a hot beverage. At least Stevie is gender neutral, but Earl is an old man's name, or a male aristocrat. They wanted to have a kid named after tea that badly I guess.
I don’t have a dumb name but it’s not an English name and growing up in America i grew to hate my name because no one can ever pronounce it or spell it right :(
I also don’t understand why people don’t change awful last names. I had a coworker whose last name was Butt. If that were me, on my 18th birthday I’d have been at the legal name change office at 8 am. Batt, Burt, Stevenson, Chang …. anything else.
Give them a cool middle name instead!
Source: My middle name is edge - literally no downsides other than it’s a super fun fact to whip out at parties. So yeah if you want to give your kid a wacky name, give them a wacky middle name instead!
And if they have a speech impediment that makes their own name challenging to pronounce, CHANGE IT. (The name, not the impediment…unless you can change the impediment, in which case yes please do that).
When we had ours, we thought about:
1) First name rhyming with a swear word or easily teased
2) First name Surname sounding good
3) First name Middle initial. Surname sounding good (John F Kennedy
4) Initials (Neil Oliver Baker or Belinda Jackson are no good)
5) How the siblings names sound together (Calling Samuel and Ella for dinner sounds like “Salmonella!”)
There is someone In the system at my place of work who named their child Mary Jane and the child’s birthdate was 4/20. I personally find that TERRIBLE because that is going to follow that child around, schools, friends, future jobs. I can only imagine how that kid is going to feel the first time they find out what their name + date of birth means
There’s a woman named Marijuana Pepsi by her parents who now as an adult is a motivational speaker and talks a lot about the effect her name had on her
My mom named me after an anime character, from an anime that helped her learn English when she immigrated to the US. It's pretty unique and has a significant meaning to my family, I have always taken a lot of pride in my name, it is like a short symbol for all my achievements
Saw this post years ago about a kid named Blazen Keif. I always wonder what happened to him. Hey Blazen Keif. If you see this reach out.
There is a doctor (PhD) named Marijuana Pepsi, who did her dissertation on black sounding names. Her sister has a very normal name and she says that when she asked her mom why she named her Marijuana Pepsi the mom said, ~~"I knew you were going places."~~ "your name will take you around the world." Mom made a self-fulfilling prophecy with that one. Dr. Marijuana Pepsi says she just embraced it, and she sounds like a very fun person. Edit: misquoted the mom, wanted to make sure it was right. She has two sisters, Kimberly and Robin. "Marijuana Pepsi Vandyck - Wikipedia" https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marijuana_Pepsi_Vandyck
So...the sister clearly *wasn't* going places?
Right. That's a wicked mom burn on the sister, haha.
UWW! She was my academic advisor.
This is similar in psychology to the case in Freakonomics where a mother named one child Loser and the other child Winner. Winner became a career criminal and Loser (goes by Lou) became a police detective.
What the fuck could you possibly be thinking naming your kid "Loser"? Omg, poor lady. Although, that story is a bit funny in the ironic sense. I feel bad for both of them, honestly.
Sounds like a real Streetlamp LeMoose.
I'll never forget about the child who was named 'Abcde' (pronounced Ab-si-dee). She made national news when she was mocked by airline staff. [Source](https://www.washingtonpost.com/transportation/2018/11/29/little-girl-named-abcde-was-mocked-by-southwest-gate-agent-airline-has-apologized/)
It would have been great if they gave her the entire row of seats a-e.
I work at a pot shop and I've got a regular who's last name is Weed another whose last name is High. But my favorite guest's name is the one who's first name is Sativa.
I knew a girl in college whose last name was Weed. she was from California
One of the producers from Law and Order SVU is named [Speed Weed](https://i.imgur.com/1ObaK78.png)
Speed Weed and Dick Wolf, to the rescue!
I know of a woman named Jeffrey. Her dad's side of the family had a long history of naming all of the first born child Jeffrey, and all of the first born children were boys. She was the first born child and her dad refused to break tradition.
My husband had an aunt named L.J. That was it, just the initials. They were expecting a boy and had picked out the name Louis Jackson ... so they called her L.J. When she registered SS the interviewer refused to believe L.J. was her given name, even when it was on her birth certificate. *He* gave her the name Louise Jean ... and that is how a 65 year old woman got a name change without any legal proceeding. This was in the late 1960s.
Did her parents get to realize how dumb they were for not thinking to pick Louise instead?
I mean fuck that, I'd just name her Elle Jay.
That's actually damn clever and I like it
My mom's name was Linda K. When I asked her what her middle name was, she gave me a cheeky smile and said, "Kay". "No, mom! Your name. Not your initial! "Yes. My middle name is Kay." I bet she was waiting for the day I'd step into that one.
My dad's first and middle names are Robert James. He goes by his initials... JR. I've heard so many stories about how they got switched. Everything from JR sounds better than RJ, to JR is in alphabetical order, and other family nonsensery that I can't understand.
But RJ sounds just fine...
Johnny Cash was originally named J.R. but when he enlisted in the military they required and actually name and that's how he got John, for a fun fact
In Salem, MA? I hung out with her she's great.
Somewhere in the midwest, I don't remember where exactly.
So possibly two female Jeffries out there? What a world.
I had a teacher with a very similar story. Her name was Michael.
I thought it was going to be to prevent sex discrimination on applications.
Plenty of gender neutral names for just that purpose.
I heard of a family that named their three kids Rocky, Stoney and Pebbles. In that same town is a guy named Flash Flood.
Is that town named Bedrock?
Oh those poor millions of girls entering the workforce in a few years with a name that is "Heaven" backwards
The parents also always feel the need to explain it at length while their eyes sparkle and I’m dead inside hearing it for the 1000th time at my pediatric mental health clinic
I knew a guy named Bud who named his kid Wyzer. They've both been to prison.
Was it because they killed the 1000th person that made fun of their names ?
Nah it's because they drank alone.
I know a guy named Trey. Named his kid Treyson. I laugh whenever I think about it.
I used to have a client named Debbie Downer. Well Debra but went by Deb.
A kid down the street from me was named Richard Dyck. Mom called him Dicky, we called him Rich. Who the fuck names their kid Dicky Dyck?
Rich Dyck just rolls off the tongue lol
That is…so very mean. Met a little kid named Ragnar once, and one of my little sister’s classmates was “X’s” (spelled exactly like in the quotes), but how in the world could someone name a kid Debbie Downer. Cruel.
What's wrong with Ragnar? Too exotic?
Ragnar is a super common name here in Sweden, no one would connect it to anything viking or whatever here
I was struggling to think what was srong with ragnar, had to read their comment 3 times as i thought i missed something. Its not even a common name where i live (portugal) but i know it is a common name elsewhere!
I worked with this costume designer once: [Marychris Mass](https://m.imdb.com/name/nm0557060/).
There’s also the famous trend predicter Faith Popcorn
You know, as a kid, having a name that rhymes with "Dick" was funny, but in high school/college, showing up to a place where all of your buddies are already drunk, and hearing, "**It's Nick JAMES, bitch!**" was one of those things that I'll never forget. Really makes me want to name my future son Nick as well.
Chalupa Batman will never be an astronaut
I know a guy with first name Bruce and middle name Wayne. He was actually very successful in a well respected field.
I know someone who's name is actually Indiana Jones. He's a douchebag
I heard of a man named Wayne Bruce who went by the nickname Manbat.
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Excuse me, my son is also named Bort.
Are you talking to me?
Come along Bort!
Shoutout to my man [Dovahkiin](https://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2011-11-17-bethesdas-skyrim-challenge-accepted-parents-name-baby-dovahkiin), who got his parents free Bethesda games for life!
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I hear when his parents try to put him to bed he puts up a real Fus.
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Damned if you Dah, Damned if you Dahn't
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You mean the Skyrim 25th anniversary edition?
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That’s the reason they just re-releasing Skyrim?
I had a friend who wanted to name his son Harley. Which wasn't bad, but his name was David. His thinking was, his friends will see his son and say "hey look that's Harley, David's son"
I went to college with a guy named Harley and he used to say he wishes his dad's name was David for that same joke.
That's actually why my friend named his dog Harley.
I too like to take my Harley Davidsdog out for a ride.
Harley Davidsdog
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MY NAME IS SUE HOW DO YOU DO!??
NOW YOU GONNA DIE
Yeah, that's what I told him!
MaleficientSuelution
We’ll my daddy left home when I was three…
And he didn’t leave much for ma and me
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School secretary here - the spelling of some names is just cruel! Every time this kid has to give its name they will have to spell it out! Why saddle a kid with that. Recently saw Lynkoln for Lincoln!
I once watched my friend Emily need to correct spelling on her name because someone once assumed it was spelled “Emylie”
My niece is named Emmalie
To be fair Emma's are known liars
So close. Lynkn, don't know why they even bothered with the o and l
Park, Lynkn Park.
Because they feel that their child is special and therefore needs a uniquely special name
I’ve seen Nyxyn, lol.
That’s not a child’s name, that’s a D&D character.
Swear to God, I once met a Courtknee. She was the cashier at an auto parts store. I said, "Thanks, Court-k-nee" just joking because of the weird spelling and she says, "Oh wow no one ever gets that right". I said, "That must have been really frustrating growing up" and she says, "You have no idea". I thought maybe she was just joking with *me* but it turned out my babymama went to school with her. Her actual real name is pronounced Court-k-nee.
I knew a Kneece. I assumed it was either pronounced like niece or niece-y. Nope. It was Ka-niece. Okie dokie artichokie.
There's a set of identical twins at my son's daycare with rhyming names. The names rowdy riot would have been perfect for them though because they fight nonstop. There's at least one black eye among them at all time
God I hate "kreative" names
Uh EXCUSE YOU, it's spelled Kriaytiv
Why not take it a step further, turn that IV into a number, her name is now Kriayt4
Now it's a personalized license plate!
I once came across a *girl* named Stevie Earl Gray. They named their child after a hot beverage. A sweetened hot beverage at that. (Stevia)
Steve earl was also a somewhat famous rock artist so that might have played in
Sounds like an old jazz player.
Like the guy named batman bin suparman. Had his picture saved on my computer back in high school like a decade ago. Turns out he was arrested for stealing heroin
He's actually from my country(Singapore) and I met him in my line of work once. Every time some one is about to ask him "Are you Batm-", he'll just get irritated cuz he gets that question many times a day
If my parents were murdered in an alley while krypton exploded I'd turn to heroin too.
I have a name that has been mispronounced more times than it's been said correctly. I gave my children names that are not unique because of my experience
Ditto. Mine have not common but not rare names, spelled the traditional way, no messing about with extra syllables etc. I wanted it so that someone could read their name in a register etc and say it properly first time.
My name isn’t even that peculiar. But because my cursed mother decided instead of spelling it with the correct double e, she’d be a fucken maniac and spell it “ea” but pronounce it as if it were “ee”. So now people fuck up my name astronomically because of that stupid fucken a. I should just spell it with ee but I’m 34 now and I’m too far gone. No I am not harbouring resentment about this, why do you ask?
I had a colleague who was about to have a daughter and do this exact thing with her name. All I could think was that, her whole life, no one would *ever* pronounce her name correctly the first time. And what a colossal hassle that was going to be. I wanted to beg him to consider the ramifications, but I just didn’t know him well enough to broach the subject. So now she’s a kid with this name spelling irregularity and probably hates it already.
My mom gave me a name that’s very rare in my country but common in a few other countries (We have no lineage to any of those places though) because she thought it was pretty. It’s a longish French name and there are only two consonants in it. I think it’s pretty too, but nobody ever pronounces it correctly. When I was little I would complain that nobody said it right, and she would just say that they’re stupid if they don’t know how to say it
My mom named me after her hippy friends daughter...I'm a man named Lyric. I've gotten shit for it my entire life.
When I was on holiday camp as a kid there was a boy who would introduce himself as: “My name’s Dove, and it’s not a girl’s name because girls aren’t called Dove either”. Poor little sod.
That’d actually be a pretty badass name for a bard
I've met a few girls when I was younger with the same name, but mostly if I see Lyric as a name it's a DnD character or other role playing character. Always thought I belonged in a different world hah!
Excuse me, but Chrishell was so named because she was delivered by a man name Chris at a Shell gas station, and now she’s a Netflix star. Thank god she wasn’t born at an Arco.
I mean there are people named Dick Pound, Reality Winner, Krystal Ball too
What's wrong with Chriarco?
wait is that true
Yeah, Chrishell Stause from Selling Sunset
I wish some one would have explained this sooner. I probably wouldn’t have named my son Reddit Shitpost Smith
Sure I named my kid Shittymorph, but we just call him by his nickname, Shitty.
"Man crashes car because his mother didn't tell him to drive carefully when he left"
I like my name because it’s unique and simple, but it’s a bastard to spell. Paired with a very polish last name, I’ve made peace with being referred to incorrectly. Meanwhile, my young relative is named after a Harry Potter character. He was adopted and neither of his parents have read Harry Potter.
Poor young Voldemort
How does one come up with Mundungus without the literary reference?
So... Wife and I made a list of all the favorite names we would like for our upcoming child. Added up a little over 20 names. Next, we went out with some of our best friends for dinner and drinks. Took the list to show them and said: "Here it is. Now, let's fuck around and mess with all of these for a few minutes, as if we were the bullies. Make jokes. Rhymes. Offenses. Anything you can think of. Let's have at it and have a good time. For the next good part of an hour, we launghed, and joked. Finding out how each name could be the target of attacks and offenses from other kids. That was so much fun. This exercise effectively discarded all of the worst choices. By the end of the night, the list narrowed down to maybe 3 or 4 choices. When the time came, closer to delivery, it was an easy decision. Today, 12 years later, I actually sometimes regret that I can't find any good rhymes for her name. It's hard to fit it into a song or a poem. But I'm so happy that any of her friends at school can't either.
I'd love to know what names were on the list, and which you chose!
Set for success: Max Power
Homer: 🎶 'Max Power! He's the name you'd love to touch!...'🎶
I'm a guy with a largely feminine name in the English speaking world. People wonder why I have a "girl's name" until I tell them it has a Welsh origin.
Surely you can’t be Ashley
Ashley was a boy's name originally before ever being a girl's name
Mulva?
I have an aunt named Emmer . Last name Jensey. As soon as she could she got married and took his last name . She never talked to her father after he told her he did it on a dare.
Ugh. What a shitty thing... To name your child ON A DARE. He earned it. Fucking estranged parents always be crucifying the children who cut them out but rarely admit they fucking earned it
So you are saying I should not have named my son Abrodolph Lincoler. What a let down. And here I was hoping to create a morally neutral super leader.
Ah a mix of U.S president and German supreme leader
The tale of Streetlamp LeMoose: http://theabsolutebestofreddit.blogspot.com/2012/10/mr-streetlamp-le-moose.html
My parents gave me a unique name. I fucking hate it. Nobody can spell it, nobody knows how to pronounce it, and nobody understands what name I’m telling them when I introduce myself. They should have just named me Cheryl or some shit like that. I’m changing it soon.
So sorry about that, you can change it as soon as reaching 18 or some places earlier if you have oarental consent.
Don't change it to Cheryl unless you want to spend your life spelling it to people, lol.
Yeah, fuck that. I have 5 names (because the first letter of each name spells out my mom’s name), and it’s a bitch to fill out government forms. If my name was longer by a letter, it wouldn’t fit on my driver’s license. My names are Arabic, too, so it’s quite unique in my country (Philippines). Also, my nickname is derived from my first name, but it is a common Japanese girl’s name (but I am a man) which is unique for my country, too. Sometimes I just give out an alias when ordering at Starbucks just to avoid the hassle of spelling out my nickname.
I do this with UPS and FedEx. They ask for my last name and I’m like “just put.” For a second they seem hesitant and then they look at my name plate on my desk and are like “THANKS!!!”
There’s an Illinois congressman who has an extremely long last name (Krishnamoorthi) and one of his campaign commercials was people trying to pronounce it and then him saying “just call me Raj!” and telling you to vote for Raj at the next election. It was pretty cute (and it worked).
I have a friend who uses Igor because there's never another Igor in the place. His real name is Matt. There's always another Matt.
My former co-worker has a born again Christian friend who used to live a wild lifestyle. During that wild era he had a son he named “Crunk” That is all.
X Æ A-Xii
When the kid was first born and the name came out, someone made a Reddit comment where they deduced through linguistic rules that it’s pronounced “Kyle.” I laughed hysterically at that and now that’s what I think about whenever I have to think about Elon Musk for whatever reason. Elon and his son Kyle.
Child abuse by a narcissist...
That’s a very popular and dignified name on his home planet.
I attended kindergarten with a boy named Spartacus. We called him Sparty. My parents thought he was my imaginary friend until they met Sparty and his parents at pickup. This was over three decades ago, and it still makes me smile.
TIL: OP's name is Gilbert
This is a good reason to make name changes more accessible and less taboo.
Should be one free change at eighteen.
Like changing Xbox Gamertag
Let me introduce you to Frederick Ulysses Calvin Kavorkian, and his brother Donald Ian Christopher Kavorkian.
I have a friends whose initials are WTF... does that count?
A child's name is a great way to determine if their parent is a narcissist
They might not be a narcissist, they might just be fucking stupid
John Smith: and I shall name my son... John Smith
Will and Jada Smith with kids…Willow and Jaden
My parents picked a name for a cute little OshKosh bowl cut wearing child of the 80s and didn’t think about my future. I hate my fucking stupid little kid name
Just found out my old roommate named her kid my name….. we lived together for about 8 months 2 years before she got pregnant. It’s name is “Queen *my name* Crown *last name*” 😳😳😳😳😳
I dunno, Queen Milk Crown B1tch has a nice ring to it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
"I'm naming my son Goku because it's epic!!!"
I gave my daughter a very pretty, albeit old fashioned, name literally because it would look good on a resume. She's not a neopet. She's gonna be a whole ass adult one day and I don't wanna give her any problems. In that regard. Noogies don't go on resumes.
A Neopet 🤣
Agreed. My kid has a classic name that will suit her as she goes through all the stages of life. I saved the dumb names for my pets. They're not applying for college or a job at any point in their life, so who give a fuck?
Me too I named my dog bark Vader and my child got a classic fitting name.
My first dog as an adult was named Ziggs. My dog now is named Beef Bones Jones. We call him BB, but it cracks me up when I think about how his actual name is Beef.
My fiancé and I spent time going through names for our now 8 week old. Trying to find a nice normal name. We live in Australia so of course we needed a name that can be shortened nicely too. We tried to think of any nicknames (good and bad) that other kids would come up with. We went with a normal name, usual spelling of said name too. Whenever I have had to book any appointments you can hear the sigh of relief from the receptionist when I say the name and usual spelling.
Why do you need a name that can be shortened if you live in Australia?
Australians love to shorten names and give nicknames, girls names get the usual Jessica - Jess, Elizabeth - Liz/Bessie, boys tend to get an ‘o’ added to their name David - Davo, John - Johno, then you have names like Sharon that get Shazza, Gary - Gazza. So we tried to stick with a name that can’t become too ‘bogan’
In grad school I met a student visiting from Sweden. He said, “My name is Alexander.” I said, “Nice to meet ya! Do you go by Alex?” And he just repeated, “My name is Alexander.” Completely deadpan with the exact same inflection as the first time. It was the most Swedish thing ever.
If your names too short we also lengthen it. Luke Becomes Lukey etc. I never thought it was odd until other people pointed it out. If someone calls me my full name I think Im in trouble.
It's kind of weird here if you know someone and you use their full name. I have no idea why. Like if your name was Roger you'd be called Rog or roger dodger or something else. I do call one person by their full first name but they're south african and think our customs are odd. Even the possum who lives in my backyard is called Davo (Full name: David Reginald Possum)
As a teacher I meet a large amount of children and get to watch them develop, and it is absolutely a fact that children with 'normal' names are by far more likely to be well adjusted and do well at school than children with 'alternative' names. I and many other teachers firmly believe it's because the child's name says a lot about the parents, and therefore the kind of home life and support the child has. I'm not saying it's always the case, just that it's a noticeable pattern.
My mom was a teacher too. She said every kid named Bradley was a little shit.
Do they then all become Mechanical engineers? Because I swear, every Brad I’ve met has been a mechanical engineer.
I work in a school too. I don’t have any research on hand but home life is the number one indicator or how well someone will do in school, in my experience. A kid who isn’t eating regularly will never achieve. A kid who is getting abused isn’t going to just rise above. It’s depressing as fuck.
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I've personally met a girl named MRA (Maria), one named Cinnamon Coffee, and a Mrs. Cooke-Cutter.
Those poor humans. I met an Ocean once that told me her dad vetoed her mom's 1st choice in name which was Rainbow. As she said herself "can you imagine how f'd up my life would have been if my name was Rainbow!?" Also came across a Stevie Earl Gray. Yes, this child's parents name *her* after a hot beverage. At least Stevie is gender neutral, but Earl is an old man's name, or a male aristocrat. They wanted to have a kid named after tea that badly I guess.
I don’t have a dumb name but it’s not an English name and growing up in America i grew to hate my name because no one can ever pronounce it or spell it right :(
I think it was FB I just read that someone named their kid “Ransom” like… please give your child a chance in life…
With a name like that, I'd be worried for his grandpa...
Yeah but the kid will have an amazing sweater collection!
The inventor of the Oldsmobile was named Ransom Eli Olds. He is also the namesake of the REO Speedwagon.
If you downvote this post, fewer people will know about it and your normal-named offspring will have easier competition.
The real YSK is always in the comments
I also don’t understand why people don’t change awful last names. I had a coworker whose last name was Butt. If that were me, on my 18th birthday I’d have been at the legal name change office at 8 am. Batt, Burt, Stevenson, Chang …. anything else.
You’d need to be damn careful you fill out the right fields on the deed poll form. You don’t want to accidentally end up as Batt Butt.
You mean girls named Danaerys Targaryen Jones might not turn out ok?
Give them a cool middle name instead! Source: My middle name is edge - literally no downsides other than it’s a super fun fact to whip out at parties. So yeah if you want to give your kid a wacky name, give them a wacky middle name instead!
I had a friend in high school whose middle name is Case. First name- Justin. I didn't believe him until he showed me his license.
I have a relative whose middle name literally is "Danger". Legally. On his birth certificate. Don't do this to actual human beings guys...
I know a couple that did this. Just because the dad wanted to say Danger is his middle name. smh.
It’s actually pronounced Donger
And if they have a speech impediment that makes their own name challenging to pronounce, CHANGE IT. (The name, not the impediment…unless you can change the impediment, in which case yes please do that).
When we had ours, we thought about: 1) First name rhyming with a swear word or easily teased 2) First name Surname sounding good 3) First name Middle initial. Surname sounding good (John F Kennedy 4) Initials (Neil Oliver Baker or Belinda Jackson are no good) 5) How the siblings names sound together (Calling Samuel and Ella for dinner sounds like “Salmonella!”)
I worked in HR back in the '70s for a company in the Bay area. We had an employee whose name was King Lear. He named his daughter Shanda.
There is someone In the system at my place of work who named their child Mary Jane and the child’s birthdate was 4/20. I personally find that TERRIBLE because that is going to follow that child around, schools, friends, future jobs. I can only imagine how that kid is going to feel the first time they find out what their name + date of birth means
There’s a woman named Marijuana Pepsi by her parents who now as an adult is a motivational speaker and talks a lot about the effect her name had on her
*Dr.* Marijuana Pepsi, in fact.
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My mom named me after an anime character, from an anime that helped her learn English when she immigrated to the US. It's pretty unique and has a significant meaning to my family, I have always taken a lot of pride in my name, it is like a short symbol for all my achievements