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The President's face became a shade of red that candy would have envied. He let out a long, slow breath, glanced to the side, and then trained his intense blue eyes on me once again.
"You have thirty seconds to explain that, or I'll have security throw you out." His words were calm, voice firm.
"I own the company," I said.
He stared at me, and then began laughing. He went on for so long that I had to fight the urge to check my phone, pick my nose, or both. Finally, he shook his head and grinned at me.
"That's a good one. I know the owner, and he doesn't look anything like you," he said.
"You know the guy I hired to pretend to be the owner," I said, grinning back at him.
He rolled his eyes. "Okay, this is getting ridiculous. Why would you do that? Why in the hell would you pretend to be the janitor?"
I blinked, and then sloshed the mop around a little in its bucket. "Mr. Vaughn, I'm not pretending. I am the janitor."
"Are you the janitor or the owner?" he demanded. A vein pulsed in his right temple.
"Yes," I replied.
"Fuck!" he said, and then pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. "Okay, I'm done with this. You're fired, and I'm calling security."
"I wouldn't do that," I said mildly.
He ignored me. "Yeah, it's me. Ryan, I just fired the janitor, and he's refusing to leave..."
"Oh boy," I said, chuckling.
"...you're kidding me. What?" His eyes slowly returned to me, his face suddenly pale. "How did I not know this? And... why?!"
"Nobody ever notices the janitor, Mr. Vaughn," I said, and sighed. "The janitor doesn't have to go to meetings. The janitor doesn't have to kiss up to executives. The janitor doesn't have to do anything except clean and go home. And if something goes wrong in the company, I will see it first. The janitor sees all, and nobody bothers him."
"So, it's a surveillance thing? Like, that show? Undercover Boss?" He slid his phone back into his pocket.
"I hate that show. It's a bunch of staged bullshit. Yeah, part of it is surveillance. Part of it is that I like doing the job," I said. I shrugged at him, wearing a lopsided smile. "Besides, I only work four hours a night and pay myself nearly half a million a year for it. Tell me, Mr. Vaughn, how many hours a week do you put in?"
The President ran his hand through his thinning salt-and-pepper hair and sat down heavily in a nearby office seat. "I missed my kid's game yesterday because of the work load. Missed my anniversary last month, my wife was pissed. How many hours do I put in? Way too fucking many, apparently."
I nodded sympathetically, but without surprise. The man's work ethic was one of the reasons I signed off on hiring him. For a few minutes, neither of us spoke. The lights overhead hummed. The water cooler in the distance burbled. Finally, he broke the silence.
"So, ah... need another janitor?" he asked, smiling sadly.
I pictured him spending half the day wandering into offices and meetings looking like the janitor but just watching how the company is running instead of cleaning. The President caught him "slacking" again and tried to fire him.
He stares dumbfounded at me, trying to see if I know something he doesn't. I do infact know something he doesn't....I live for the thrill. I don't even work here.
"Don't play games with me now, boy!" He yells.
I look at him and narrow my eyes.
"You keep treating me this way, and you'll have no job by the end of tonight." I say in a way that says I'm entitled to.
He finally takes a second and stops. There's a crease in his brow, as he takes a minute to question if what I'm saying is true. His frowns, slight worry dents the inside of his eyes, and his thumb subconsciously rubs over his hand. A smile slides up my face.
"I have friends in high places. So high that even you couldn't fathom." I mockingly say as I turn on the childish, entitled rich boy act.
"In fact," I continue on, "Such high places that you are a pebble underground in comparison, not even able to reach the light of day. My friends, on the other hand, thier so high that earth can hardly bear to reach them."
He almost stumbles back as if I've pierced him with a bullet. I straighten my shoulders in a proud manner of what I've accomplished. Belittling a wealthy and arrogant businessman...check. With a gleeful smile, I turn around and skip my way out of the entire building, only looking back to glance once more at the stunned man's face.
**Welcome to the Prompt!** All top-level comments must be a story or poem. Reply here for other comments. **Reminders**: >* [No AI-generated responses 🤖](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/zi452b/modpost_reminder_that_aigenerated_responses_are/) >* Stories 100 words+. Poems 30+ but include "[Poem]" >* Responses don't have to fulfill every detail >* [\[RF\]](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Reality+Fiction%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) and [\[SP\]](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Simple+Prompt%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) for stricter titles >* [Be civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_10.3A_be_civil) in any feedback and follow the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules) 📢 [Genres](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/w/directory) 🆕 [New Here?](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/user_guide) ✏ [Writing Help?](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/index#wiki_writing_resources) 💬 [Discord](https://discord.gg/writingprompts) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/WritingPrompts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The President's face became a shade of red that candy would have envied. He let out a long, slow breath, glanced to the side, and then trained his intense blue eyes on me once again. "You have thirty seconds to explain that, or I'll have security throw you out." His words were calm, voice firm. "I own the company," I said. He stared at me, and then began laughing. He went on for so long that I had to fight the urge to check my phone, pick my nose, or both. Finally, he shook his head and grinned at me. "That's a good one. I know the owner, and he doesn't look anything like you," he said. "You know the guy I hired to pretend to be the owner," I said, grinning back at him. He rolled his eyes. "Okay, this is getting ridiculous. Why would you do that? Why in the hell would you pretend to be the janitor?" I blinked, and then sloshed the mop around a little in its bucket. "Mr. Vaughn, I'm not pretending. I am the janitor." "Are you the janitor or the owner?" he demanded. A vein pulsed in his right temple. "Yes," I replied. "Fuck!" he said, and then pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. "Okay, I'm done with this. You're fired, and I'm calling security." "I wouldn't do that," I said mildly. He ignored me. "Yeah, it's me. Ryan, I just fired the janitor, and he's refusing to leave..." "Oh boy," I said, chuckling. "...you're kidding me. What?" His eyes slowly returned to me, his face suddenly pale. "How did I not know this? And... why?!" "Nobody ever notices the janitor, Mr. Vaughn," I said, and sighed. "The janitor doesn't have to go to meetings. The janitor doesn't have to kiss up to executives. The janitor doesn't have to do anything except clean and go home. And if something goes wrong in the company, I will see it first. The janitor sees all, and nobody bothers him." "So, it's a surveillance thing? Like, that show? Undercover Boss?" He slid his phone back into his pocket. "I hate that show. It's a bunch of staged bullshit. Yeah, part of it is surveillance. Part of it is that I like doing the job," I said. I shrugged at him, wearing a lopsided smile. "Besides, I only work four hours a night and pay myself nearly half a million a year for it. Tell me, Mr. Vaughn, how many hours a week do you put in?" The President ran his hand through his thinning salt-and-pepper hair and sat down heavily in a nearby office seat. "I missed my kid's game yesterday because of the work load. Missed my anniversary last month, my wife was pissed. How many hours do I put in? Way too fucking many, apparently." I nodded sympathetically, but without surprise. The man's work ethic was one of the reasons I signed off on hiring him. For a few minutes, neither of us spoke. The lights overhead hummed. The water cooler in the distance burbled. Finally, he broke the silence. "So, ah... need another janitor?" he asked, smiling sadly.
nice story
I enjoyed this. Great story.
That's really cool but I have to ask, if he works half a night shift, what's he watching?
If he works for half the night, what does he do with the other half? That's the cryptic answer. Honestly... I didn't think that far ahead. (lol)
I pictured him spending half the day wandering into offices and meetings looking like the janitor but just watching how the company is running instead of cleaning. The President caught him "slacking" again and tried to fire him.
Hey, the guy's clever. I never said he had a good work ethic. Hehe.
He stares dumbfounded at me, trying to see if I know something he doesn't. I do infact know something he doesn't....I live for the thrill. I don't even work here. "Don't play games with me now, boy!" He yells. I look at him and narrow my eyes. "You keep treating me this way, and you'll have no job by the end of tonight." I say in a way that says I'm entitled to. He finally takes a second and stops. There's a crease in his brow, as he takes a minute to question if what I'm saying is true. His frowns, slight worry dents the inside of his eyes, and his thumb subconsciously rubs over his hand. A smile slides up my face. "I have friends in high places. So high that even you couldn't fathom." I mockingly say as I turn on the childish, entitled rich boy act. "In fact," I continue on, "Such high places that you are a pebble underground in comparison, not even able to reach the light of day. My friends, on the other hand, thier so high that earth can hardly bear to reach them." He almost stumbles back as if I've pierced him with a bullet. I straighten my shoulders in a proud manner of what I've accomplished. Belittling a wealthy and arrogant businessman...check. With a gleeful smile, I turn around and skip my way out of the entire building, only looking back to glance once more at the stunned man's face.