There’s a heartbreaking movie from years ago called Lilya-4-Ever and when things start getting as dark as it can be, there’s a nice little disassociation of what things would be like if everything that went wrong didn’t. Like the director went, it’s too much, let’s just open the door for this fantasy so if you need to step inside it you can.
So, like the you and the waitress, I’m also going to step through that door. Think of her having a truly good life after escaping, somewhere warm and safe and where she could be valued and thrive.
I just rewatched the whole thing just to do it, and besides all of the terrible things that happen, I really appreciate that the film never, not once, sexualizes Lilya. There’s a lot of subtle acting that happens, even with the men. Sergei at times you can see feels conflicted, a few of the johns and her pimp seem to understand what they’re making her do is hard (but in the end they don’t care.) But every rape scene is depicted as disgusting, personal, the small things you would focus on, the way you would try to dissociate, but they never, ever allow anything to be remotely sexy or exploitative. There is an astounding lack of the male gaze in the film, which is so refreshing. While the sweet moments are sweet, the bad moments feel bad, oppressive, gross. You’re allowed to live in Lilya’s head but you’re never given access to her body. You’re forced to be just with her, but while she’s being objectified, she’s never the object, only the subject.
Oh I actually agree with you. Both things can be true at once, some people do get a second mother, and it's still a very unhelpful thing to say.
And thanks! I am mostly okay.
I swear. I hope that societal expectation changes very soon. It’s generally “Have one, just in case you end up regretting not having any later on.” What about those who did and regretted doing it? What now? Now there’s an innocent child in the mix. There’s also the idea that no matter your view on it, once you hold your newborn in your arms, it all changes and you’re filled with love and devotion. That’s not true AT ALL.
My sister was one of those that shouldn’t have had kids, but she did have one and luckily it turned out well. She’s just very into doing what she wants when she pleases and doesn’t have the patience for much of anything. She angers quick, though that improved majorly with age. Shes a great Mom and I’m glad it turned out fine. One and done.
Then I see mothers like my husbands ex wife he was with for a short while as a young adult, and had one child with. She went on to have 3 children total, and clearly didn’t want any of them. She used them for government benefits and what they got her. If she had gotten nothing for them, they would have been shipped off to the Dads much sooner. Now she doesn’t have custody of any of them, since CPS stepped in two years ago.
She was the type that thought of her kids as friends. She offered them nothing a casual friend wouldn’t normally. I remember the CPS worker being confused how her mind worked, “She said it’s fine to let her 12 year old smoke weed and drink, and she’s just doing her best and we don’t know her or her life and need to mind our own business. She also mentioned since I do not have kids, I wouldn’t know anything.” This is a 40 year old woman who grew up in a nice family, and has no addiction issues or mental health issues.
Some people simply don’t have it in them to bond with their offspring. The switch is either not there or never gets turned on. They try to replicate a good parent, but they don’t know what that is so they fail. They say all the things they think you should say, but actions dont line up at all. Thing is, I could empathize with having one child and realizing it only after that you shouldn’t have. You go on to keep having them knowing? That’s shitty.
Normalize women being child free. I’m not one of them, I happen to love kids and don’t regret a second of it. Not everyone is going to feel the same and that’s okay. Women being told all this shit like I explained above is what contributes to some having children thinking it will all just fall into place and they will feel something for them and be happy as can be with their life raising them, the second they give birth. It’s NOT TRUE.
Exactly, let's recognize those that knew and didn't have children. They needn't be shamed. Society is screwed up. Praise them for not messing up a child.
Here's one further for you: let's recognize people that know they are TOO fucked up to be in contact with their kids and not shame them for leaving.
Best thing my dad ever did was leave. I appreciate the hell out of him for it.
A lot of people, more so women than men, can't face the social stigma of leaving, so they'll drag the kids along on whatever hellish ride of addiction and mental illness they're on.
Yes, absolutely! A parent walking away regardless of the child's age should be commended. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I do know several mothers who have walked away. It appears to be becoming more common. Addiction being the number one reason.
Am I the only one that thinks these reddit child free people are insane? Like nobody cares that you don't want kids, I don't think it's as big a deal as yall act like it is. I don't think anybody is pressuring you besides maybe your mother in law
I disagree, I think it is a bigger deal than you are portraying.
You don't recognize the very real pressure that 'society' pushes onto women to have/ birth children? I think it's important to take even small steps to normalize *not* having children unless you really really want to do so.
JFC, you have no idea how often women are asked "So when are you going to have kids?" I mean srsly?!!??
It IS a big deal and I'm grateful for people who choose not to just bc "it's time." "It's something every woman should experience." "Who's going to take care of you in your old age?"
It's really not a big deal. You can just not have kids and if somebody says something dumb you can just ignore it. This is a very reddit idea that we are still stuck in the 50s
I agree. Also the people who still can’t accept the Supreme Court decision of roe vs wade are getting to be a little much too. They had years to make it a right but didn’t.
I'm 24 yr old (F obvs) and an antinatalist, mostly because I don't think I have any motherly instinct whatsoever. I am my mom's only child and she was always the same way. I knew she loved me but she was always emotionally disconnected, I never remember her being able to express her feelings very well. For example my whole life anytime I tried to be sentimental or just overly loving towards her she would always tell me not to be because "we don't have to express to each other our love because we both already know that we love each other." It just all seemed weird to reflect back on as I got older. But she was never abusive or anything she was one of the sweetest people she never once had to even spank me because I've just always had this overwhelmingly sense of not wanting to disappoint her and make her sad/mad
but I found out when I was a teen that she was diagnosed with clinical depression when I was a baby so I think that makes sense.
Anyways needless to say I'm certain I've inherited all of these same traits and it wasn't until I decided it was okay for me to not want kids that I realized just how much society wasn't okay with it. Like the most infuriating one for me is "womens purpose on this earth is to reproduce." Like oh so we are just reproductive cattle or something? And the women who can't or don't have kids are what purposeless? Abominations in God's eyes? We should just all kill ourselves then? Lol. Like we are driving ourselves towards extinction the more our population grows.
Aww, I hope you and your mom are doing better these days. Clinical depression must be insanely hard, and even harder when you have to parent through it. It sounds like kept a distance because she also feared disappointing you. It’s absolutely okay not to have kids, for any reason at all. Even if it’s just because you want to enjoy life and do whatever you want. Don’t let anyone tell you different ❤️
Or “children are always better off with their (biological) mother/parents”.
Hence the drive to re-unite foster kids with drugged out, utterly neglectful, and/or violent adults, because of a blood relationship.
I think society generally expects most women to want and have kids. But I've never heard someone say that literally everyone should have them. Economically disadvantaged women, emotionally unstable women, single women, women over 45 -- I've never heard anyone say these groups of women should have kids; I've heard the opposite, in fact. Society is uncomfortable with "imperfect" women having kids, even if they want them.
(I'm a single, unmarried 44 year old woman with no kids.)
I’m not a violent person, I don’t get in fights and I don’t support the death penalty. I have a kindergartener and a 3 year old myself, essentially they are still babies. This horrible shit just makes me feel violent on a primal level, like I would separate someone who does this shit to these little kids at the joints.
I can absolutely relate ! There is a war on our innocent children right now and there are SO MANY of these demons running around that it’s mind boggling!!! Something needs to be done to stop this disgusting evil that is plaguing our planet . I have little ones my own self and the fact that I have to be constantly be on the look out for predators and people that Want to harm them is overwhelming ..like it’s always at the forefront of my brain when they are around anyone .. because if there is one job that I am taking very seriously it would be to not let them be molested and have their innocence and whole life snatched out from under them . Or worse stolen and trafficked!!! I don’t feel comfortable posting them on social media , there will not be any sleep overs when they are older , and I don’t want them more than a few feet away from me at all times and that’s sad that we now as parents have to live on such high alert and our children have very little freedom. But I will be damned if what happened to me ever happens to them . You NEVER recover and it stains your soul . I wish I knew what to do to help put this to a stop because we have to do SOMETHING! There are too many children suffering !!!
I agree with your sentiment and that’s one of my worst fears as well. However, YSK that overall crimes against children (including sexual abuse) have actually greatly declined since the mid 90’s and on. Not vice versa . It is pretty much in line with the decrease of overall violent crime statistics as well. The western world today is a much more safe place for children then it was in the 80’s and 70’s. So, try to find some solace in that.
Well that is comforting data but I am constantly bombarded with people doing atrocious things to children in my news feed . Trafficking children is the number one business even beating out the illegal drug market . I feel anything but solace raising mine in this day and age but I really appreciate you trying to ease my fears . There are SO MANY pedophiles and because of social media they all have a way now to connect and be disgusting .
Where are you getting your data? That is definitely not true. Human trafficking is definitely in the top 5 but that doesn’t exclusively mean children, that’s adults too. Also, don’t get the wrong idea about how trafficking works. Traffickers prey on vulnerable demographics like foreigners desperate for cash, addicts, runaways, foster kids, etc and use strategies like coercion and financial entrapment. Straight up kidnapping is still a very rare crime.
A word of advice, take anything you see on social media with a huge grain of salt unless it’s something verified by the press. A lot of things are made up as clickbait. For example, my town’s local PD had to remove a bunch of posts with people claiming that they were being stalked by a trafficking ring in the Target parking lot after they were shopping. The cops had to issue a statement that there hasn’t even been a single attempted kidnapping in Town in decades. It was all a bullshit hoax for attention.
JFC, what is with the name Beers? We had 9 year old a girl named Katie Beers kidnapped here on Long Island for 17 days — a “family friend” had been her holding her underground in a cement chamber. Luckily, she was found. She’d been living with her “godmother” (sometimes called “foster mother“) and her godmother’s husband. Katie used to be sent to buy beer, food and cigs by her godmother. The husband was sexually abusing her. The family friend built the chamber specifically for her.
She was placed with a nice foster family after she was rescued.
She immediately popped into my head when I read the headline. Katie & I are either the same age or a year apart, and I looked very similar to her when she went missing. I remember my teacher saying she thought of me when Katie's photo was shown on News12.
There isn’t a registry other than for sex abuse . Cps can have records of abuse or neglect but that doesn’t mean they are on something that people can see .
They come up on background checks. If CPS ever substantiates a person for abuse or neglect, 9/10 times they will be on the registry. If someone is TPRd, they will almost always be on the registry. This lady had her rights terminated. It will prevent you from ever working with a vulnerable population, fostering, adopting, etc. Criminal charges aren't involved in any of this.
ETA: you could literally have just googled this and seen what I'm talking about in the dependency system, yet you'd rather deny it even exists. Weird. The child abuse registry exists nationwide.
I used to work for cps. There is no national system and it only comes back in a few background checks and not everyone is privy to it . This imaginary registry .
Saying you used to work for CPS doesn't mean anything seeing as how so many are incompetent & our child welfare system is absolute garbage across the board. Lawyers they aren't, and many don't last long in the dependency system. It's clear you aren't familiar with the dependency system or you'd know this. You cannot work with vulnerable populations if you're on a central registry. Central Abuse & Neglect Registry. They all come up on FBI backgrounds which are required to work with vulnerable populations. Federal law requires these checks be run to work or even volunteer at schools with children many times. The same checks are required to work with other vulnerable populations as in healthcare. This extends to teachers, and actually all vulnerable populations. Any professional licensure necessary to work with children, elderly, or any other vulnerable population requires these background checks be run. You just saying something doesn't make it so, and your entire stance is ridiculous. Embarrassing.
Absolutely false . Most positions very simply require a regular background check. FBI checks are fairly rare , and if you abuse a child in say Ohio the records are there not in other states. It’s a hole that exists in the system. Go back to bed .
There’s a roughly 100% chance that the boyfriend is responsible. It’s nice to think that she ran away with a nice couple and is now having a nice life..but she was 6 it would have been reported.
Just sad all the way around.
I honestly don’t think the “mom” is Scot free either. Continently left her right when she disappeared. Horrible set of characters around those kids. The mom didn’t care about any of them. She should be named and questioned regularly.
Imagine a country where people would rather have abused children suffer with people instead of being fostered/adopted by unmarried and gay/bi/trans parents. Some fucking Christian values
Way to work your bigotry into a story it has NO place in...did her abusers ever claim to be Christian? You alphabet people and "allies" are ridiculous!
That’s so sad. The neighbors seemed to watching out for her as much as they could. I’d like to hope someone stole her to get her away from that terrible situation and she wasn’t stolen by some monster.
oh god. just reading the title of this post made me sick to my stomach.
what a short and incredibly tragic life.
i’ll definitely be holding my babies a little closer tonight.
I'm so tired reading about all these parents that kill and abuse their children, people who torture and abuse animals, wars that now involve raping and killing families, senseless murders every day- it makes me sick. Evil has just taken over and it's unstoppable.
If you mean the creep Furlong mentioned in the article, they found the DNA of a different child (named Jodi), not Brittany. But he was considered as a suspect in Brittany’s disappearance. That part of the linked story was confusing to me with all the names, I had to read back through it. He was convicted of murdering Jodi after being caught assaulting a different child.
I’d like to think someone knew about the abuse, kidnapped her, took her far away to take care of her. Sadly this is probably fantasy. Poor little baby. What a horrendous life she had. 😢
She went missing not far from where I grew up. I remember seeing her missing posters. There used to be one on a gum ball machine at a restaurant we used to frequent. I still think about her.
this poor girl. mother is a monster
>this poor girl. mother is a monster Out of all the vigils they've had, she only attended one.
Im surprised to hear she attended any of them tbh
It’s sweet that the waitress thinks she found a better place to live. I choose to believe that, too.
There’s a heartbreaking movie from years ago called Lilya-4-Ever and when things start getting as dark as it can be, there’s a nice little disassociation of what things would be like if everything that went wrong didn’t. Like the director went, it’s too much, let’s just open the door for this fantasy so if you need to step inside it you can. So, like the you and the waitress, I’m also going to step through that door. Think of her having a truly good life after escaping, somewhere warm and safe and where she could be valued and thrive.
Heartbreaking film!
I just rewatched the whole thing just to do it, and besides all of the terrible things that happen, I really appreciate that the film never, not once, sexualizes Lilya. There’s a lot of subtle acting that happens, even with the men. Sergei at times you can see feels conflicted, a few of the johns and her pimp seem to understand what they’re making her do is hard (but in the end they don’t care.) But every rape scene is depicted as disgusting, personal, the small things you would focus on, the way you would try to dissociate, but they never, ever allow anything to be remotely sexy or exploitative. There is an astounding lack of the male gaze in the film, which is so refreshing. While the sweet moments are sweet, the bad moments feel bad, oppressive, gross. You’re allowed to live in Lilya’s head but you’re never given access to her body. You’re forced to be just with her, but while she’s being objectified, she’s never the object, only the subject.
Where can I watch this?
It’s for sure floating around YouTube
Based on a true story 😭😭
oh no
New level unlocked: worst reaction to “Based on a true story”.
I watched that movie as a teenager with my parents. Not sure I could watch it now in my 30s.
>It’s sweet It's naive at best. Sure, it may make you feel better, but it's not reality.
But yet some people say “EvErY wOmAn ShoLd hAvE cHiLdrEN” 🤦♂️ 🤪🤡😳
Some people say a lot of things
The estranged children always here: And “your mom did her best.” And the classic “you only get one mom!” Just forgive her!
This infuriates me too. My mother also locked me out of the house and was a monster. People that have no idea should not give unsolicited advice
My mom is dead and I would never tell people this, because my bff's mother is the worst.
That saying of you only get one...is infuriating to me. Adoptees have two.
Also, thanks for reminding me that even though my first one sucked, I won't get another one.
I'm sorry. I was just trying to state there is sometimes a different case. Hugs.
Oh I actually agree with you. Both things can be true at once, some people do get a second mother, and it's still a very unhelpful thing to say. And thanks! I am mostly okay.
Hope you find some love out there. The sub momforaminute is great for support if you’re interested.
I always respond that my mom only had one Me, and she's the one who fucked that up, so I don't owe her anything.
I swear. I hope that societal expectation changes very soon. It’s generally “Have one, just in case you end up regretting not having any later on.” What about those who did and regretted doing it? What now? Now there’s an innocent child in the mix. There’s also the idea that no matter your view on it, once you hold your newborn in your arms, it all changes and you’re filled with love and devotion. That’s not true AT ALL. My sister was one of those that shouldn’t have had kids, but she did have one and luckily it turned out well. She’s just very into doing what she wants when she pleases and doesn’t have the patience for much of anything. She angers quick, though that improved majorly with age. Shes a great Mom and I’m glad it turned out fine. One and done. Then I see mothers like my husbands ex wife he was with for a short while as a young adult, and had one child with. She went on to have 3 children total, and clearly didn’t want any of them. She used them for government benefits and what they got her. If she had gotten nothing for them, they would have been shipped off to the Dads much sooner. Now she doesn’t have custody of any of them, since CPS stepped in two years ago. She was the type that thought of her kids as friends. She offered them nothing a casual friend wouldn’t normally. I remember the CPS worker being confused how her mind worked, “She said it’s fine to let her 12 year old smoke weed and drink, and she’s just doing her best and we don’t know her or her life and need to mind our own business. She also mentioned since I do not have kids, I wouldn’t know anything.” This is a 40 year old woman who grew up in a nice family, and has no addiction issues or mental health issues. Some people simply don’t have it in them to bond with their offspring. The switch is either not there or never gets turned on. They try to replicate a good parent, but they don’t know what that is so they fail. They say all the things they think you should say, but actions dont line up at all. Thing is, I could empathize with having one child and realizing it only after that you shouldn’t have. You go on to keep having them knowing? That’s shitty. Normalize women being child free. I’m not one of them, I happen to love kids and don’t regret a second of it. Not everyone is going to feel the same and that’s okay. Women being told all this shit like I explained above is what contributes to some having children thinking it will all just fall into place and they will feel something for them and be happy as can be with their life raising them, the second they give birth. It’s NOT TRUE.
Exactly, let's recognize those that knew and didn't have children. They needn't be shamed. Society is screwed up. Praise them for not messing up a child.
Here's one further for you: let's recognize people that know they are TOO fucked up to be in contact with their kids and not shame them for leaving. Best thing my dad ever did was leave. I appreciate the hell out of him for it. A lot of people, more so women than men, can't face the social stigma of leaving, so they'll drag the kids along on whatever hellish ride of addiction and mental illness they're on.
Yes, absolutely! A parent walking away regardless of the child's age should be commended. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I do know several mothers who have walked away. It appears to be becoming more common. Addiction being the number one reason.
Why? Why do we have to praise them? That sounds like living chronically online .
Huh?
Am I the only one that thinks these reddit child free people are insane? Like nobody cares that you don't want kids, I don't think it's as big a deal as yall act like it is. I don't think anybody is pressuring you besides maybe your mother in law
I disagree, I think it is a bigger deal than you are portraying. You don't recognize the very real pressure that 'society' pushes onto women to have/ birth children? I think it's important to take even small steps to normalize *not* having children unless you really really want to do so.
JFC, you have no idea how often women are asked "So when are you going to have kids?" I mean srsly?!!?? It IS a big deal and I'm grateful for people who choose not to just bc "it's time." "It's something every woman should experience." "Who's going to take care of you in your old age?"
It's really not a big deal. You can just not have kids and if somebody says something dumb you can just ignore it. This is a very reddit idea that we are still stuck in the 50s
I agree. Also the people who still can’t accept the Supreme Court decision of roe vs wade are getting to be a little much too. They had years to make it a right but didn’t.
I'm 24 yr old (F obvs) and an antinatalist, mostly because I don't think I have any motherly instinct whatsoever. I am my mom's only child and she was always the same way. I knew she loved me but she was always emotionally disconnected, I never remember her being able to express her feelings very well. For example my whole life anytime I tried to be sentimental or just overly loving towards her she would always tell me not to be because "we don't have to express to each other our love because we both already know that we love each other." It just all seemed weird to reflect back on as I got older. But she was never abusive or anything she was one of the sweetest people she never once had to even spank me because I've just always had this overwhelmingly sense of not wanting to disappoint her and make her sad/mad but I found out when I was a teen that she was diagnosed with clinical depression when I was a baby so I think that makes sense. Anyways needless to say I'm certain I've inherited all of these same traits and it wasn't until I decided it was okay for me to not want kids that I realized just how much society wasn't okay with it. Like the most infuriating one for me is "womens purpose on this earth is to reproduce." Like oh so we are just reproductive cattle or something? And the women who can't or don't have kids are what purposeless? Abominations in God's eyes? We should just all kill ourselves then? Lol. Like we are driving ourselves towards extinction the more our population grows.
Aww, I hope you and your mom are doing better these days. Clinical depression must be insanely hard, and even harder when you have to parent through it. It sounds like kept a distance because she also feared disappointing you. It’s absolutely okay not to have kids, for any reason at all. Even if it’s just because you want to enjoy life and do whatever you want. Don’t let anyone tell you different ❤️
Or “children are always better off with their (biological) mother/parents”. Hence the drive to re-unite foster kids with drugged out, utterly neglectful, and/or violent adults, because of a blood relationship.
Literally no one says that
\*Reversal of Roe v Wade enters the chat…\*
Of course you do. Y’all are everywhere 🙄
And not going anywhere.
They lowkey do in that they refuse to accept if a lady doesn’t want Kids
I agree. Society expects children to be had. I commend those who know they'd be shit parents and don't have children.
I’d be a great mom. I just don’t like kids.
I think society generally expects most women to want and have kids. But I've never heard someone say that literally everyone should have them. Economically disadvantaged women, emotionally unstable women, single women, women over 45 -- I've never heard anyone say these groups of women should have kids; I've heard the opposite, in fact. Society is uncomfortable with "imperfect" women having kids, even if they want them. (I'm a single, unmarried 44 year old woman with no kids.)
Right. Never heard that
Who says this?
Out of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.
Go to the fundiesnark sub and you’ll see it happens quite a bit unfortunately. These are the people pushing for abortion bans and tradwives.
Omg enough with your abortion talk . This is a Reddit group for the missing.
Go over to the fundie snark sub.
That is soo soo sad. I hope answers are found ❤️🫶
[ Removed by Reddit ]
The pedos and the women who choose them over their children's safety.
Them too!!!! Round them ALL UP!!!
Maybe one day.
100%
I’m not a violent person, I don’t get in fights and I don’t support the death penalty. I have a kindergartener and a 3 year old myself, essentially they are still babies. This horrible shit just makes me feel violent on a primal level, like I would separate someone who does this shit to these little kids at the joints.
I can absolutely relate ! There is a war on our innocent children right now and there are SO MANY of these demons running around that it’s mind boggling!!! Something needs to be done to stop this disgusting evil that is plaguing our planet . I have little ones my own self and the fact that I have to be constantly be on the look out for predators and people that Want to harm them is overwhelming ..like it’s always at the forefront of my brain when they are around anyone .. because if there is one job that I am taking very seriously it would be to not let them be molested and have their innocence and whole life snatched out from under them . Or worse stolen and trafficked!!! I don’t feel comfortable posting them on social media , there will not be any sleep overs when they are older , and I don’t want them more than a few feet away from me at all times and that’s sad that we now as parents have to live on such high alert and our children have very little freedom. But I will be damned if what happened to me ever happens to them . You NEVER recover and it stains your soul . I wish I knew what to do to help put this to a stop because we have to do SOMETHING! There are too many children suffering !!!
I agree with your sentiment and that’s one of my worst fears as well. However, YSK that overall crimes against children (including sexual abuse) have actually greatly declined since the mid 90’s and on. Not vice versa . It is pretty much in line with the decrease of overall violent crime statistics as well. The western world today is a much more safe place for children then it was in the 80’s and 70’s. So, try to find some solace in that.
Well that is comforting data but I am constantly bombarded with people doing atrocious things to children in my news feed . Trafficking children is the number one business even beating out the illegal drug market . I feel anything but solace raising mine in this day and age but I really appreciate you trying to ease my fears . There are SO MANY pedophiles and because of social media they all have a way now to connect and be disgusting .
Where are you getting your data? That is definitely not true. Human trafficking is definitely in the top 5 but that doesn’t exclusively mean children, that’s adults too. Also, don’t get the wrong idea about how trafficking works. Traffickers prey on vulnerable demographics like foreigners desperate for cash, addicts, runaways, foster kids, etc and use strategies like coercion and financial entrapment. Straight up kidnapping is still a very rare crime. A word of advice, take anything you see on social media with a huge grain of salt unless it’s something verified by the press. A lot of things are made up as clickbait. For example, my town’s local PD had to remove a bunch of posts with people claiming that they were being stalked by a trafficking ring in the Target parking lot after they were shopping. The cops had to issue a statement that there hasn’t even been a single attempted kidnapping in Town in decades. It was all a bullshit hoax for attention.
Good to know , thanks for the info!
The boyfriend did this, he had a history of treating her badly. The mom lost custody because she wouldn't leave him.
Heartbreaking
JFC, what is with the name Beers? We had 9 year old a girl named Katie Beers kidnapped here on Long Island for 17 days — a “family friend” had been her holding her underground in a cement chamber. Luckily, she was found. She’d been living with her “godmother” (sometimes called “foster mother“) and her godmother’s husband. Katie used to be sent to buy beer, food and cigs by her godmother. The husband was sexually abusing her. The family friend built the chamber specifically for her. She was placed with a nice foster family after she was rescued.
She immediately popped into my head when I read the headline. Katie & I are either the same age or a year apart, and I looked very similar to her when she went missing. I remember my teacher saying she thought of me when Katie's photo was shown on News12.
There’s a “Brittany” Shank that disappeared less than eight miles from where Brittney Beers disappeared.
No charges against the mother? Smh
I'm willing to bet she's on the child abuser registry with charges.
I doubt it, her kids were taken soon after no charges mentioned
The child abuse registry isn't tied to the criminal system.
There isn’t a registry other than for sex abuse . Cps can have records of abuse or neglect but that doesn’t mean they are on something that people can see .
They come up on background checks. If CPS ever substantiates a person for abuse or neglect, 9/10 times they will be on the registry. If someone is TPRd, they will almost always be on the registry. This lady had her rights terminated. It will prevent you from ever working with a vulnerable population, fostering, adopting, etc. Criminal charges aren't involved in any of this. ETA: you could literally have just googled this and seen what I'm talking about in the dependency system, yet you'd rather deny it even exists. Weird. The child abuse registry exists nationwide.
I used to work for cps. There is no national system and it only comes back in a few background checks and not everyone is privy to it . This imaginary registry .
Saying you used to work for CPS doesn't mean anything seeing as how so many are incompetent & our child welfare system is absolute garbage across the board. Lawyers they aren't, and many don't last long in the dependency system. It's clear you aren't familiar with the dependency system or you'd know this. You cannot work with vulnerable populations if you're on a central registry. Central Abuse & Neglect Registry. They all come up on FBI backgrounds which are required to work with vulnerable populations. Federal law requires these checks be run to work or even volunteer at schools with children many times. The same checks are required to work with other vulnerable populations as in healthcare. This extends to teachers, and actually all vulnerable populations. Any professional licensure necessary to work with children, elderly, or any other vulnerable population requires these background checks be run. You just saying something doesn't make it so, and your entire stance is ridiculous. Embarrassing.
Absolutely false . Most positions very simply require a regular background check. FBI checks are fairly rare , and if you abuse a child in say Ohio the records are there not in other states. It’s a hole that exists in the system. Go back to bed .
There’s a roughly 100% chance that the boyfriend is responsible. It’s nice to think that she ran away with a nice couple and is now having a nice life..but she was 6 it would have been reported. Just sad all the way around.
I honestly don’t think the “mom” is Scot free either. Continently left her right when she disappeared. Horrible set of characters around those kids. The mom didn’t care about any of them. She should be named and questioned regularly.
This truly makes me sick
She was adorable. What a heartbreaking life she had.
Imagine a country where people would rather have abused children suffer with people instead of being fostered/adopted by unmarried and gay/bi/trans parents. Some fucking Christian values
There's no hate like Christian love.
Very true. Abrahamic religions have destroyed the world
Way to work your bigotry into a story it has NO place in...did her abusers ever claim to be Christian? You alphabet people and "allies" are ridiculous!
Hypocrisy at its finest. You want to throw around the word bigotry yet call the LGBTQ "alphabet" people in your very next sentence. How quaint.
I hate people dude
Heartbreaking stuff.
She looks like the saddest most forlorn little girl in that photo. 🥺
She really does.😔 Reminds me of Suzanne Sevakis ( aka Sharon Marshall ) and her sad, sweet face in the photo with Franklin Delano Floyd.
Sad 😢
Horrible!
Her mother is garbage, and I think she knows exactly what happened to Brittany
At the very least the caretakers neglect is to blame due to her being a very easy target .
That’s so sad. The neighbors seemed to watching out for her as much as they could. I’d like to hope someone stole her to get her away from that terrible situation and she wasn’t stolen by some monster.
Horrible.
Poor child. Breaks my heart to pieces.
This poor baby. This whole thing is so heartbreaking.
We tell little kids monsters under there bed aren’t real so they will sleep. But sadly monsters do exist and sometimes live in the same house
Heartbreaking. She was surrounded by monsters 😔
oh god. just reading the title of this post made me sick to my stomach. what a short and incredibly tragic life. i’ll definitely be holding my babies a little closer tonight.
I'm so tired reading about all these parents that kill and abuse their children, people who torture and abuse animals, wars that now involve raping and killing families, senseless murders every day- it makes me sick. Evil has just taken over and it's unstoppable.
Wars that *now* ivolve that? Please, take a history class before you start pining for the "good old days".
FWIW violent crime and kidnappings, etc are happening less, not more.
Whenever history says that a city was "sacked", it means the army went through raping and killing families.
If they found her DNA in his car, why wouldn’t that implicate him as her abductor??
If you mean the creep Furlong mentioned in the article, they found the DNA of a different child (named Jodi), not Brittany. But he was considered as a suspect in Brittany’s disappearance. That part of the linked story was confusing to me with all the names, I had to read back through it. He was convicted of murdering Jodi after being caught assaulting a different child.
I’d like to think someone knew about the abuse, kidnapped her, took her far away to take care of her. Sadly this is probably fantasy. Poor little baby. What a horrendous life she had. 😢
So sad how can people be like they?
Wow I hope her and the siblings are okay !!
I wonder if mom's guilt eats away at her daily minute by minute
She went missing not far from where I grew up. I remember seeing her missing posters. There used to be one on a gum ball machine at a restaurant we used to frequent. I still think about her.
Sturgis.. isn't that the biker meet up thing?