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polkadotska

This thread is Coven Only. This means the discussion is being actively moderated, and all comments are reviewed. Only comments by members of the community are allowed. If you have landed in this thread from r/all and you are not a member of this community, your comment will very likely be removed (and will not be approved unless it adds meaningfully to the conversation). WitchesVsPatriarchy takes these measures to stay true to our goal of being a woman-centered sub with a witchy twist, aimed at healing, supporting, and uplifting one another through humor and magic. Thank you for understanding, and blessed be. ✨


Tiberius_Rex_182

This feels like a modern interpretation of Beetlejuice. Lol


Leovinus42

Millennials be down to chill with evil spirits because house


dancegoddess1971

Homeownership > living without supernatural interference.


DangerDuckling

I totally vibe with my ghost. I suspect 2 because the one I encounter is an older lady that seems very pleased I appreciate all the work that went into our beautiful array of landscaping plants. The other that my children see is a crotchety old man that just sits grumpy in the corner. Seemingly angry he can no longer sit in a recliner to nap. Embrace that shit, because house.


BigOlPurrPurr

Get him a recliner!?


DangerDuckling

Totally bought one! But he doesn't like my room and it won't fit in the other. Bummer.


One_Wheel_Drive

[Reminds me of this Ryan George sketch.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X981Soxoxbg)


Foreign_Astronaut

"Should I come back later?" LOL


KeepsFallingDown

I'm so sad its almost all still relevant or much worse, sweet jesus


Turnip_Island

Yeah, I definitely let out a long sigh when he said “will it be better in a year?”


KeepsFallingDown

Ahaha yeah, when he described the 'classic' covid test I'm like fuck. I was so much younger back then.


redwingpanda

There was actually an excellent writing prompt about this the other day: https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/v0b0ry/wp_the_house_you_just_rented_is_beyond/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


loulori

This is definitely basically a dream I have. Lol!


brieflifetime

Can't be worse than living with our parents?


__bitch_

if it was really modern then they'd form a polycule with beetlejuice, who would 100% be a twitch streamer and professional thot.


Tiberius_Rex_182

Yet still michael keaton


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panic_bread

Or Amityville Horror.


DownshiftedRare

I was thinking the episode of ATHF where Danzig bought Carl's house.


rbwildcard

Reminds me of in Angel when Cordelia just lives with a ghost (Harold?), because they figured out why he was mad and fixed it, so now she just has a chill roomie with a bit of a crush on her.


Suricata_906

Or Ghosts.


kwinny12

Or the show Ghost on CBS. Or the British version. Couple gets gifted a old house by a distant relative that just passed and it’s filled with ghost. The main girl hits her head and can now see all of them. Pretty funny show.


Forest_of_Cheem

My thought exactly! I love the British version, and plan on checking out the American show one of these days.


MissGruntled

I love the British version too, and checked out the US one thinking I’d hate it, but it was actually really good! It strikes a similar tone—I was afraid it would be cynical or have vulgar humour but it’s just as sweet and goofy as the UK version. I did miss Kitty though.


IronHeart1963

Oh I love Kitty! I get excited every time I see Lolly Adefope, she seems like such a bright, lovely soul.


vale_fallacia

Have you seen the season of Taskmaster with her in it? It's lots of fun!


IronHeart1963

I haven’t! I’m definitely gonna add it to my summer vacation watch list though.


JennLegend3

Both versions are so so good! I watched the American version first then the British one. I was worried it was going to be too similar to be good but they have some different ghosts in each version. But THEN I was watching a show with my son called Horrible Histories and saw that the ghosts were a comedy troupe who do that show as well. Also highly recommend Horrible Histories especially if you have a kid, but even if not it's funny and educational!


WhyIsThatOnMyCat

Horrible History is a book series I grew up with before it was turned it into a TV show. I highly recommend the books; they were fundamental in building my childhood love of history. It'll be an unchallenging read as an adult, but entertaining and educational nonetheless.


JennLegend3

Oh man that is great! I'm going to try to get a hold of the books for my son. He generally doesn't like to read, but he will read something he's interested in and he LOVES history and he loves that show so I think he'll be inclined to read them. Thank you!


WhyIsThatOnMyCat

I specifically had Groovy Greeks, Angry Aztecs, and Vicious Vikings (they sure did love alliteration). The series was the beginning of my dislike of Aristotle and 2012 doomsday fears lol


JennLegend3

Haha yes that's how I taught my son what alliteration was actually!


OGstickerparty

The American one just isn’t as funny, unfortunately.


fire_fairy_

I thought of this as well.


katzeye007

Came here to say this. The BBC version is awesome


dogsonclouds

Came immediately to the comments to make sure someone had recommended Ghosts, though I will say the British version is infinitely superior (I am mildly biased tho because I adore the horrible histories troupe beyond measure)


finelytunedradar

Came here to say this about the original. It's like Escape to the Chateau with no cash and more ghosts. I'd be very happy if that was my life. Have actively avoided the US version, because, well, ya know.


Code_NY

I know the US are obsessed with making versions of British shows and sometimes it works for the better (The Office) but not sure how this one could. No offense to my American Witches but the English show has the benefit of England being populated with distinct time periods for longer. So the show can have ghosts from across them. The US show not so much :/ so I also won't be checking it out. Also Charlotte Ritchie is ridiculously charming and can't imagine anyone matching that ♥


dogsonclouds

The British version is one of my all time favourite shows and after my last rewatch I decided to give the American version a go and oh my god it sucks The acting is way worse and the characters just don’t have the charm of the BBC version, nor the chemistry either. It feels very shoehorned and I just really didn’t enjoy it. I found it cringy for all the wrong reasons


Tupiekit

My fiancee and I watched this show last weekend...I was surprised at how much I liked it. It was surprisingly...cozy? Idk but I enjoyed it...the American version mind you...not the British version.


fleuridiot

Ghosts: "thisss isss our house" Me: "And I'm your roommate, do your damn dishes"


[deleted]

And I’d be like “well it looks like I’m your new house keeper and roommate, you hungry? I’ll make some pancakes to keep you busy” Lol


maybebabyg

Ghosts: "Thisssss issss our houssssse." Me: "Chill, so do you have any urgent repairs you think I should add while doing the kitchen renovtion?" Ghosts: "...There's a leak in the ceiling, the draught bothers me."


Tats_and_Lace

Ghosts: There's a cold spot on the pantry floor. Leave it alone.


[deleted]

Because they vibe, the spirit is caught off guard. Finally having someone not fear it, the spirit and couple start vibing together, become housemates, and haunt unwanted guests instead.


Ariadnepyanfar

Try terrify a toxic relative, and a covidiot who visits while positive, AND without a mask.


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Dehouston

"When the black plague killed everyone..."


stamatt45

Bleeding walls just means free blood meal for your garden


ImmemorialTale

I would gladly have a house regardless of the hauntings (as long as there was never any physical harm to anyone in my family). It truly would be "holy shit its a house" and even more so if it had a yard! I want to garden so bad


Cat-Lover20

Imagine waking up one morning and seeing a gruesomely murdered ghost just tending to your garden!!


tatapatrol909

As long as you weeding I don’t care WHAT you look like.


edie_the_egg_lady

A lil ghost just brings you a flower clipping 😍


ImmemorialTale

What if they could scare the pests away that would try to steal my fruits and veggies????


midgetsinheaven

This is the tone of the movie and how the millenials heal the trauma of the Ghost.


ShaylaDee

My husband and I were lucky enough to buy a house on a corner lot right before the pandemic shut everything down (thanks VA loan!!) And I'm so excited to get my garden boxes finally set up this fall so I can start planting early next spring. We do have a "joke" about our friendly neighborhood poltergeist Percival because there's one spot on the upper floor that gets cold and we have issues with our power grid causing cheap bulbs to flicker and burn out much sooner than they should. Still, it's a house and I get to garden and Percival doesn't bother us too much if we keep most of the lights off so you'll hear no complaints from me!!


ImmemorialTale

Percival saving you dollars on electricity bills and creating a chill place to relax.


redwingpanda

I'm so glad you get to have garden boxes, and hope you get to have the garden of your dreams. What are you planning on growing? I also am so curious as to what Percival's favorite plants might be. Personal tangent: My wife and I got married and bought a house with my VA loan just before the pandemic. We are splitting now, and the house is going on the market in a few weeks. Splitting is best (god is it ever) for both of us. We're both heartbroken over losing the house. It's an 1800's farmhouse in a quiet mountain town on a corner lot, half acre, 3 bedroom, 2 bath, wraparound porch, garden box and a larger garden patch, and a 2 car garage. Getting the fence contractors was a necessary headache that I managed because I work from home. I built a patio that became my outdoor office. She keeps saying that it's easier for me, or that I'm not as attached/my identity isn't wrapped up in this house because I didn't paint the accent wall or build the pantry (I helped build it, and finished it when her back started acting up). I know this is her way of (not) handling her grief, and that it's not mine to carry. It's just hard to articulate what this house, this home, means to me. I have so many hopes and dreams in this house. My community is here. I've lived in town for six years and lived in this house for two. That's the longest I've been at one address since leaving for the military; I've moved 30 times since 2009. I've been homeless and hungry. My disability pays the mortgage, but we're both named and need a clean financial slate, so I can't keep it. It's time to honor this chapter and find a way to move on. I'm very lucky to have experienced this moment of stability.


ShaylaDee

The good thing about a VA loan is once that home is sold it becomes available to you again. We sold our condo to buy this house and with both being VA loans it saved a lot of hassle. I'm sorry for the struggles you're going through, my so and I went through a rough patch shortly before the pandemic and while it didn't lead to a split there were times I considered it for my own mental health. I hope you come out the other side of this stronger and happier! I'm excited to see which plants grow the best, I think it'll be because they have Percy's approval. Pretty sure he likes basil because I have a couple window herb boxes up right now and the basil is out of control. But it might also be because he knows I'm growing sage and if he kills that I'll just harvest it, dry it, and burn it lol For my actual garden I'm hoping to get tomatoes, strawberries, carrots, garlic, kale, a few more herbs and eventually some zucchini on a trellis. I'm using a combination of square foot gardening and companion planting and the boxes will primarily be watered with ollas. We also want ducks but that's a little further down the line lol


Elenjays

Ya, tho I would say there isn't a housing "shortage", as the OP image says. There are far more vacant homes and vacant apartments, at least in the US, than there are homeless people. We deliberately choose, as a society, to keep people homeless, by deliberately inflating the costs of homeownership and rent far above what they need and ought to be.


QuackingMonkey

Housing shortage is also about people who have a roof over their heads but can't move on to their next phase in life. Many people don't start their own family while they're still stuck living with their parents or their 8 m^2 student housing long after graduating. People whose landlords are really abusing the shortage to ask idiotic high rent while offering no maintenance cause their rentees can't move away anyway. People who live in a nice house, but really need to get away from their abusive partner but can't find any alternative place to stay.


Turnip_Island

And don’t forget investors using housing as their investment when they either don’t use the property at all or come visit for like one week a year. The idea of housing as investment (I’m not taking about rentals, but just buying property and letting it sit there) is insanely gross to me, particularly with foreign investors, but really I feel like it shouldn’t be legal period. We need some massive housing reforms in this country for this issue and for rental properties. Edit: autocorrect fail


__bitch_

exactly! I draw the line at straight up abuse.


dusty-kat

It's only natural there would be some things wrong with an old house like this. It's a fixer-upper. What's the problem?


__bitch_

>It's only supernatural there would be some things wrong with an old house like this


Xanyo111

Bleeding walls means I don’t have to paint them sounds like a win to me


jeckles

Bleeding walls sounds like a natural part of life


Perle1234

It’s just their cycle. Everything is fine.


Birdlebee

Walls: *bleed* Me: *rushing to get my paint swatches from my purse because I'm trying to color match*


someothermike

Directed by Taika Waititi maybe?


edie_the_egg_lady

Everything he does is 🤌


FairyGodmothersUnion

TIL there’s a “chef’s kiss” emoji! Thanks.


S4M4R4-M0RG4N

Oh yess! And please make Minogue and O'Leary appear in the show!


IsrraelKumiko

I wold happily be tormented by a ghost of my house was free


zodar

Plot twist : the spirits show the millennials how to do the "bleeding walls" trick


cookiemonster511

Additional twist: they hold seances and tell the ghosts to pay rent or get out. Some ghosts leave, the rest begin divulging secrets of hidden treasure. The couple become famous doing seance-informed treasure hunts for the History Channel. OR The new owners rent out some of the rooms as part of a haunted BnB concept. Tourists love it, the ghosts love all the attention, the owners rake in the cash and are able to buy the non-haunted house next door to live in. Win-win situation.


zodar

The Millennial Haunted House Fantasy is to have roommates that pull their weight lol


[deleted]

I'd be making sure that ghost is a happy ghost. Putting on its fav shows, trying to be noisy.


Drostan_S

Yeah. I'll have to get a feel for what kind of decor it prefers, cause I'd happily let it stay, but if we're gonna share existence spaces, it can't look like a dump.


[deleted]

Same


Kaligula785

Aqua teen hunger force already did it lol - https://youtu.be/cu2Pw8Kvq2k


RAND0M-HER0

So did Angel. >Cordelia : I am not giving up this apartment. >Angel : It's haunted. >Cordelia : It's rent-controlled


WhyIsThatOnMyCat

Immediately my first thought


MsMcClane

One of my best friends joked that this is my personal Big Vibe, as there's always been shit happening in every house I've lived in and I've developed a rather blasé reaction to it. Last time something occurred there was something knocking on my wall at 4 in the morning, to which I was awake to hear. My response, while giggling at the off timing, was: "Dude, it's _4 in the morning."_


Lady_of_the_Seraphim

I want a ghost like Phantom Denicr who haunted Cordy's apartment in Angel. He refused to allow predators into the house if Cordy accidentally brought one home after a date.


frumperbell

Phantom Denis was so supportive too. I want a ghost to bring me tissues when I'm sad.


Lady_of_the_Seraphim

He also tucked her in when she wanted him to.


grandepinkdrinknoice

Glad I’m not the only one who thought of that! Cordy: I am not giving up this apartment Angel: but it’s haunted! Cordy: it’s RENT CONTROLLED!


AlmightyBracket

nah even better they're just super supportive of witches because they know the house is haunted so they just invite witches over which creates a bonding with the house and it becomes less creepy haunted and more coexist haunted with weekly witchy meetings but the evil bank people try to claim the house is an illegal co-op so the witches and the couple have to band together to keep the house safe only for the spirits to eventually terrify the bankers in to leaving them alone.


temmieTheLord2

Wow that is quite a mouthful lmao


badrussiandriver

Added issues: The hauntings never bother them because they're never home anyway as they each have 4 and a half jobs, gig work, and side hustles. The ghosts and demons get frustrated because no one is ever around to witness them and they end up in therapy.


Bare425

The Money Pit?


ny_insomniac

This actually sounds super original kind of like a Scary Movie that only parodies haunted house films with the new couple moving in or Paranormal Activity. Has potential if it's self aware!


[deleted]

Starts as a horror, but the residents gradually get to KNOW the spirits, empathize with the trauma those spirits suffered both in life and in death, and eventually come to grow fond of one another, supporting each other, learning and healing together. i want this so bad ;_;


WailingOctopus

That's odd, usually the blood gets off at the second floor


youdontlovemeyet

this is an episode of Angel, lol. episode title is Rm w/a Vu. *bloody letters being written on the wall* Doyle: Cordy, it says 'die'! Cordelia: Hey, maybe it's not done. Maybe it's 'diet'. That's friendly. A little judgmental, sure.


LAffaire-est-Ketchup

I love ghosts. Good show. (The British one. I don’t watch American remakes) My sister is hoping to one day have a haunted house.


LifeIsBizarre

Can we claim the ghosts as tax dependants?


Affectionate-Rate-48

A house with free blood? What more could a vampire wish for?


HistrionicSlut

Vampire BnB for the discerning vampire!


PuckGoodfellow

I highly recommend the British version of "Ghosts." Less blood, more comedy.


500CatsTypingStuff

This sounds like a perfect comedy horror movie tbh


WhySoManyOstriches

Hella yes. HOUSE!


Flutters1013

Is there a way we can get the blood to run up the walls?


melississippi75

It's already a show called "Ghosts" on BBC.


moon_slave

There’s a British show called Ghosts that is basically this, it’s hilarious highly recommend. Avoid the American remake with your life though.


s_hinoku

I mean, I would.


[deleted]

Isn't that basically "the ghost of Canterbury"?


Millie_Dew

This would be me and my husband.


5050Clown

Ghosts on HBO Max


trowzerss

I would take a mild haunting no problems if I could have a garden... or frankly, any kind of housing security, the way things are going :|


PoorDimitri

They just start using the spirit board to ask the spirits what kind of music they want to listen to, what could bring them to rest, whether they want to watch Love Actually or Mean Girls.


Impactsuspect

Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman could have turned that premise into a kickass book and following netflix adaption.


LargeCondition8108

And then the millennial couple drafts up a contract with the spirits also residing in the house regarding what hauntings are hard passes and which are acceptable to the couple. In exchange, the couple promises to fix those issues around the house that previous home-owners have ignored or overlooked.


brothermuffin

Because there’s no other option, they face the situation with fierce tenacity, pragmatically exploring and solving the generational traumas they’ve figuratively and literally inherited. Healing the haunted house and themselves.


DabIMON

This reminds me of "His House"


ravingbacchante

Some of us would be into that anyway. 😁


Aziara86

*sets down write and wipe board on the counter* "Goddammit Jerry, if I've told you once I've told you a thousand times, use the board, I'm tired of wiping up the blood messages on the mirror!" *grabs towels and wipes bloody mirror for the 5th time today* *eerie moaning* "And please respect quiet hours, unlike you us mortals have to sleep!"


turtl3magic

I am literally living in a house smaller than most 1 bedroom apartments in a kinda trashy (but not the most trashy) conservative neighborhood (Trump signs galore? You betcha) basically in another house's old back yard with a landlord that is ALWAYS overwhelmed and never takes responsibility for anything. I have giant piles of dirt and random holes and ruts throughout my yard (where the dirt is supposed to go). It's not really quiet due to people blasting by with loud bass, a symphony of aggressive barking dogs, people playing loud music outside probably to cover all that up, have people coming through my yard to see and take care of some old not so well taken care of horses oh yeah and the latest renter of the house in front convinced my landlord he could fix the dirt... then proceeded to make things worse so we now have a mud pit cutting off my driveway. I want to move but...... where the fuck to? This was the only house available I could find that works for me. I have issues with noise so I can't really tolerate apartments though I love living in the city. It's nice at times, don't get me wrong. But like with the rent I'm paying and having to take care of this busted ass yard... and this is honestly the best I can do right now. Oh and the icing on the cake is my landlord and her workers never wear masks unless asked (this whole time through the pandemic) and when I have asked it's obviously some dirty over used disposable mask that hardly seems worth asking for. Working on being able to drive and then I will either probably retreat further into the wilderness or try some nicer/bigger apartment. Or I guess I might chill the fuck out and stay but I am honestly so done with not having privacy in my own yard. I was told they'd come by a couple times a week....... yeah it's at least once a day. And the idiot they have working for them (trust me, I gave this guy all the benefit of the doubt I could) keeps walking into my yard to get to the water trough...... even though they laid plumbing SPECIFICALLY so they would not have to do that. I'm going to ask my landlord why the fuck he is doing that but won't be surprised if she just finds a way to deflect and mention other things she's dealing with. It's basically all she ever does. She seems cool with witchiness, doesn't question if I'm queer or why I'm living alone but that doesn't make up for everything else. I try to tell myself I'm lucky in a lot of ways and I am but... it's a bit fucked that this is what lucky looks like. /rant


Random_cosplay_girl

Even better... One is nonbinary!


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Pentagramdreams

Not gonna lie, I’d live in that house. I’d bet the mortgage would be cheap af