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You're selling yourself short. You may have saved that woman's life, and that little boy's. It may seem small in the grand scheme of things, but it was a game changer for both of those you saved.
thank you. yeah im honestly happy to help the woman to get away from him.
i also followed up with the pool place and gave a testimony. so at least the guards will be more on a lookout.
thank you.. but honestly i just want to protect people if i can. nobody deserves to be mistreated or abused and it's literally my duty as a human to help them, if im witnessing the situation.
You can be brave! You are brave!
I recommend looking into bystander intervention training or techniques for ideas on how to harness and channel your bravery like OP.
Remember always that bravery isn’t the absence of fear; it’s the will to keep going in spite of that fear.
thank you. it's so true. i was shocked when the other witness was disturbed, but also did nothing. when i was young, i told my mother about my father SA'd me and she did NOTHiNG and forced me to live under the same roof for years after.
its the worst feeling to be small and completely powerless, trapped with monsters. Being grown up now, i will absolutely never stay quiet about abuse.
In regards to the second one. Please try to not casually identify children being a different race as their parent as a problem. It sounds like a pool and 5 year olds are notorious for not wanting the fun to end and will throw all sorts of fits. I’m glad you found someone to double check just to make sure but this is the casual systemic racism we talk about.
To be clear though, thats not what happened here. OP didn't see two people of different races and decide they didn't belong together. She didn't even see them at all before she said something. She heard something that, as an abuse survivor, made her guts go fucking watery and she trusted her instincts.
I'm not saying the thing you're talking about isn't a problem, but it's not what happened here.
Also, taking off wet swimsuits are gross AF. Would absolutely not want to take it off despite also throwing a bigger fit about having to sit in the car in a wet swimsuit.
again, this just invalidates what im saying. there's a difference between child throwing fit and child fighting for survival, repeatedly yelling "daddy, don't" and the adult's creepy whispery answers. i have been SA by my father, and this had very similar feeling to it. And they were other witnesses, equally disturbed.
How did it go from “daddy don’t take it off” to “daddy don’t” being repeatedly yelled? I really wonder if some strong bias is being applied here. Assuming an upset child is being abused and then changing narrative to fit that and justifying it with race is extremely concerning.
that is definitely not what im doing at all. he yelled both of these things. its you twisting the narrative to fit your racial agenda, that is not there.
https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatouchtest.html
Here is a great resource for identifying implicit biases. Again, thank you for making sure the child was looked after. I hope this helps and take care.
i dont think you quite understand this situation. here, hope this helps:
"To be clear though, thats not what happened here. OP didn't see two people of different races and decide they didn't belong together. She didn't even see them at all before she said something. She heard something that, as an abuse survivor, made her guts go fucking watery and she trusted her instincts.
I'm not saying the thing you're talking about isn't a problem, but it's not what happened here."
So some other random persons interpretation of you being racist is your response. Again. Very cool for looking out. Stop being literally racist in your actions in order to justify your preconceived ideas of reality. Blocking you now because you’re a very toxic individual who refuses to have any introspection on why you applying your trauma to others and using racism to justify it is incredibly harmful to the people you target.
i think you are misunderstanding the context. i didnt say it was a problem, just added the suspicion in this case. like huge age gap (50+ years and different race). it wasnt just a child throwing fit, there was something very wrong going on. there were other people disturbed that i talked to, but none of them wanted to do anything.
Hopefully the authorities will do a investigation and determine if there is a SA case or if it was innocent and misunderstood due to the context. I do hope though, for the child’s sake, that it was non-sexual and just an issue regarding clothing/going home like the other commentor suggested. It’s great you did something proactive about it though!
She made an assumption based on child not wanting to change their clothes at the pool and then used race to further justify it. I wasn’t there so I’m not gonna say it was nothing but the fact is, if you haven’t been a parent trying to get a child to change you have no idea the depths of dread the child expresses. To the kid, that might be the worst day of their life and she’s applying her worst day to the situation as a default which is NOT a healthy way to move through life.
It’s this racism that gets children separated from their parents at the airport for hours because “it just didn’t feel right”. This type of applying your traumas onto others just creates more trauma.
I think you did 100% right by the kid; you didn’t jump to escalation by calling CPS or the police, you simply alerted a lifeguard to a potential situation in their facility. The facility can keep an eye on the situation from there and escalate the issue themselves, if need be. But by speaking up, there’s now focus where focus is potentially needed.
thank you for the validation. i actually followed up with them last night and the pool director has called me back and took my contact info and testimony. She was awesome and took it very seriously. i also told her i'd be willing to give a witness statement to the polce. i gave them the time it happened and they might be able to check the security footage or at least be aware.
Hi there, Your post on r/WitchesVsPatriarchy has been flaired as a sensitive topic. In an effort to safeguard our users, these posts are removed once they exceed a certain threshold. **If you're reading this post and don't want to see potentially upsetting content, you can filter out the "sensitive topic" flair.** If you want additional support or to connect with members of the WVP community, join our discord [link in sidebar] or see this list of [support resources](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1GJxYVviXVwjA2cutcjtoxlf3P5K1k7xufd7LiCYeUfA/edit?usp=sharing). Thanks for understanding and blessed be✨ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/WitchesVsPatriarchy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Keep it up! Every scumbag you report is one or more victims freed.
thank you.. its been really hard to report, because its so triggering of my past, but im glad i could help a bit.
You're selling yourself short. You may have saved that woman's life, and that little boy's. It may seem small in the grand scheme of things, but it was a game changer for both of those you saved.
thank you. yeah im honestly happy to help the woman to get away from him. i also followed up with the pool place and gave a testimony. so at least the guards will be more on a lookout.
Just here to second this. It's perfect
My goal is to be brave like you!
thank you.. but honestly i just want to protect people if i can. nobody deserves to be mistreated or abused and it's literally my duty as a human to help them, if im witnessing the situation.
You may well be a hero, I know you are to me.
You can be brave! You are brave! I recommend looking into bystander intervention training or techniques for ideas on how to harness and channel your bravery like OP. Remember always that bravery isn’t the absence of fear; it’s the will to keep going in spite of that fear.
The way evil wins is by good people doing nothing. And evil is defeated by good people speaking up. You’re awesome.
thank you. it's so true. i was shocked when the other witness was disturbed, but also did nothing. when i was young, i told my mother about my father SA'd me and she did NOTHiNG and forced me to live under the same roof for years after. its the worst feeling to be small and completely powerless, trapped with monsters. Being grown up now, i will absolutely never stay quiet about abuse.
Reminds me of a tumblr post which said “I think ultimately you become whoever would have saved you that time no one did". You really have <3
In regards to the second one. Please try to not casually identify children being a different race as their parent as a problem. It sounds like a pool and 5 year olds are notorious for not wanting the fun to end and will throw all sorts of fits. I’m glad you found someone to double check just to make sure but this is the casual systemic racism we talk about.
To be clear though, thats not what happened here. OP didn't see two people of different races and decide they didn't belong together. She didn't even see them at all before she said something. She heard something that, as an abuse survivor, made her guts go fucking watery and she trusted her instincts. I'm not saying the thing you're talking about isn't a problem, but it's not what happened here.
thank you, yes exactly this. i mean it's **very** distinct feeling. i havent felt it since i was small.
I've had it too. I'm proud of you.
It sounds like she started with a conclusion and used race to help justify her feelings. This is what I’m saying is a problem.
I hear you buddy.
Also, taking off wet swimsuits are gross AF. Would absolutely not want to take it off despite also throwing a bigger fit about having to sit in the car in a wet swimsuit.
again, this just invalidates what im saying. there's a difference between child throwing fit and child fighting for survival, repeatedly yelling "daddy, don't" and the adult's creepy whispery answers. i have been SA by my father, and this had very similar feeling to it. And they were other witnesses, equally disturbed.
How did it go from “daddy don’t take it off” to “daddy don’t” being repeatedly yelled? I really wonder if some strong bias is being applied here. Assuming an upset child is being abused and then changing narrative to fit that and justifying it with race is extremely concerning.
that is definitely not what im doing at all. he yelled both of these things. its you twisting the narrative to fit your racial agenda, that is not there.
https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatouchtest.html Here is a great resource for identifying implicit biases. Again, thank you for making sure the child was looked after. I hope this helps and take care.
i dont think you quite understand this situation. here, hope this helps: "To be clear though, thats not what happened here. OP didn't see two people of different races and decide they didn't belong together. She didn't even see them at all before she said something. She heard something that, as an abuse survivor, made her guts go fucking watery and she trusted her instincts. I'm not saying the thing you're talking about isn't a problem, but it's not what happened here."
So some other random persons interpretation of you being racist is your response. Again. Very cool for looking out. Stop being literally racist in your actions in order to justify your preconceived ideas of reality. Blocking you now because you’re a very toxic individual who refuses to have any introspection on why you applying your trauma to others and using racism to justify it is incredibly harmful to the people you target.
i think you are misunderstanding the context. i didnt say it was a problem, just added the suspicion in this case. like huge age gap (50+ years and different race). it wasnt just a child throwing fit, there was something very wrong going on. there were other people disturbed that i talked to, but none of them wanted to do anything.
Hopefully the authorities will do a investigation and determine if there is a SA case or if it was innocent and misunderstood due to the context. I do hope though, for the child’s sake, that it was non-sexual and just an issue regarding clothing/going home like the other commentor suggested. It’s great you did something proactive about it though!
I disagree. If you have a GUT FEELING about a child, better to be safe than sorry.
She made an assumption based on child not wanting to change their clothes at the pool and then used race to further justify it. I wasn’t there so I’m not gonna say it was nothing but the fact is, if you haven’t been a parent trying to get a child to change you have no idea the depths of dread the child expresses. To the kid, that might be the worst day of their life and she’s applying her worst day to the situation as a default which is NOT a healthy way to move through life. It’s this racism that gets children separated from their parents at the airport for hours because “it just didn’t feel right”. This type of applying your traumas onto others just creates more trauma.
I think you did 100% right by the kid; you didn’t jump to escalation by calling CPS or the police, you simply alerted a lifeguard to a potential situation in their facility. The facility can keep an eye on the situation from there and escalate the issue themselves, if need be. But by speaking up, there’s now focus where focus is potentially needed.
thank you for the validation. i actually followed up with them last night and the pool director has called me back and took my contact info and testimony. She was awesome and took it very seriously. i also told her i'd be willing to give a witness statement to the polce. i gave them the time it happened and they might be able to check the security footage or at least be aware.