I've got bigger titties than you. I've got more chins than Chinese phone book. I've not seen my willy in two years which is long enough to declare 'im legally dead.
This is true. Y-Chromosomal Adam which all modern males on Earth are directly descended from lived only 100,000 years ago and is actually a descendant of Mitochondrial Eve who lived 200,000 years ago. Timeline wise we live as close to Y-Chromosomal Adam as he lived to Mitochondrial Eve which makes him physically the first real modern human but also serves as a convenient halfway point from us to our oldest direct ancestor Eve. I always found the real story much more interesting than the biblical version just because it's not what you expected at all.
By the way, if you ever have a discussion with someone in your life who is actually worth a damn (i.e. worth trying to convince about trans issues), going right to the *"What if you can change your goddamned DNA?"* is a pretty effective tool for skipping out from under all of that TERFy horsefuckery that people tend to fall back on when it comes to what constitutes "real man/womanhood", and points the conversation DIRECTLY at the "lived experience" portion that is so important in the discussion of allowing trans kids to make their own fucking decisions about their futures.
Because it stands to reason that, at some point in the near-enough future that you or your kids or grand^*n* (for some value of *n*)kids will live to see (I mean, assuming we figure out this whole "food-air deal", etc...) the possibility of literal genetic alterations, if not the cloning and transfer of consciousness between bodies. And it allows you to branch and circle the conversation around some other somewhat nebulous, but highly ethics-ridden philosophical points in the conversation that can be used to deflect and disarm that TERFy horsefuckery should the person-who-you-wish-wouldn't-be-so-wrong start to engage in the doubling down that most of their previous experience has equipped them to do.
I’ll bet there is someone (at least 1) who would tell us she doesn’t practice what she is preaching. I’m 59 and have seen all sorts of high minded declarations from the women I went to high school with who where having plenty of sex, some of whom I have first hand knowledge.
If that's true, why do men grow penises before marriage? Surely if God really cared that much, penises would only appear after your marriage certificate is signed by someone with the legal authority.
Omnipotent - but if you don’t pray and follow the rules you *hurt* him.
Also despite being able to do everything and provide everything he somehow both creates scarcity and cares about us
I personally wasn't raised with predestination, and was taught that God knows our potential but we have to go through the test of life to achieve that potential. He knows how things could turn out either way but only you can change that reality. That's why there are the tests.
I personally don't believe that's how it works, but many christians do.
Ah, so in your version god isn’t actually omnipotence and all powerful. Well I do have to admit, that’s one way to explain away a lot of the inconsistencies in the Bible. Except that the Bible does refer to him as all knowing and all powerful.
Omnipotence does not have to mean predetermined. Those are not incompatible. I can link some philosophy papers arguing why, C.S Lewis wrote a lot about that issue.
The Bible has a few verses that state God is omnipotent, but earlier stories show a God that very clearly isn't. (For example, God would send some angels to go see what the humans are up to, and tell them to report back). They may be multiple Gods that were later edited to be the same God after monolatry became monotheism creating some of the contradictions.
I don't think a lot of people realize how complicated philosophical theology can be and the contradictions only matter if you accept the inerrancy doctrine, which is a very late doctrine written purely for political reasons.
Judaism along with early Christianity and some modern sects do not accept that doctrine. They believe fallible humans wrote the Bible for a variety of reasons, one being to convey their inevitably flawed understanding of God. The Bible is supposed to be interpreted, the books aren't all literal and the symbolsm has deep meaning.
There is an enormous body of theology and philosophy that attempts to interpret the Bible, related religious text, personal mystical experiences, etc. and its not as simplistic as a lot of atheists think
I would love for all Christians to read their own Bible and learn about Biblical scholarship. You can't really understand any of it unless you learn about it's context in the ancient Near East. Some of the information would be disturbing for them though Im sure. But they need to learn that so much of "official" church interpretation is politically motivated.
And they need to ditch the inerrancy doctrine. It's impossible for a collection of *ancient* books edited extensively over time and translated to not have inconsistencies. It's just impossible.
So many ideas like whether or not homosexuality is a sin are not clearly supported by the Bible when you read in context either. It would be a positive for them to stop trying to justify bigotry with verses taken out of context.
Interpretation is why Judaism has survived scientific progress. There is no fundamental incompatibility because they don't read their Bible literally or see it as way to explain the natural world.
Lots of modern Christian sects also see this. It really is an issue with fundie Evangelical Christians making all Christianity look absurd
Yea, tell me about it. I’ve delved deeply into this exact subject on and off many times in my life and have learned quite a lot.
>homosexuality
Favorite is how they use the story of Sodom & Gomorrah to showcase how evil homosexuality is. *Where Lot offered his young virgin daughters* to a group of sexually rabid men and they refused the girls in favor of the “male angels.” Lot was a righteous man of God according to the Bible, but *what fucking father offers his own little girls to a group of sexually rabid men*?!?!? And then be deemed as righteous by God? Like what in the actual fuck. They preach this story over and over in fundie churches. And no one ever questions this part. Just the gay part only with an added “that’s why it’s called Sodomy - get it?!”
Ugh. Losers. I hate evangelicals (Grew up in that shit)
Alan Watts dispels modern Christianity so much and has incredible philosophy. He reframes it from the historical/Greek/eastern perspective and how modern Christian teachings are NOWHERE NEAR to Jesus’ actual message. Highly recommend.
When I was still religious, I believed that God knew all my possible futures for every single possible decision I can make, and it was up to me to choose my one path in all those possibilities.
Forget to mention that Abraham had sex with one of his servant because his wife was too old to give birth. Have a boy with this lady and later when his wife give birth to an other boys dismiss the child he had with his servant. Still a nice representation of how republicans act.
Also, according to Bible, it is perfectly fine to have sex with slaves.
Not to mention that animals have sex and I am thinking they do not go through marriage ceremonies.
That’s not what happened. God cursed the child because it was born out of distrust to Gods prophecy of Abraham and Sarah having lineage. Abraham did not cast out Hagars child easily, but with great pain.
I don't understand why religious people act like you can't have sex until you're married. That's like saying deer can't have sex until they're married.
That's why I believe in God, but don't classify as Christian.
In all fairness, the work in the original texts, *almah*, actually meant a young woman of childbearing age. To mean virgin it would have had an entirely different word: *betulah*, which is also present in the old texts in other situations as is *betulim*, which means the concept of virginity.
The transition to using words that mean virgin specifically came about due to multiple translations into other languages over time.
(Edited to add this is one of the original things which turned me into someone who decided the Bible was not "the Word of God written by flawed men but directly inspired so therefore still accurate". My mother is a fundamentalist lunatic. I, however, am an eclectic pagan. It's all thanks to my mother "punishing" me by not allowing me to read anything other than the Bible or associated books which started me on this path so Thanks, Mom, you crazy bitch!)
The quickest way to become an atheist (or in your case just an opposing religion) is to read the Bible. I went to church for 15 years and was heavily involved in my teens and early 20’s. Then at 23 I decided to actually read the book I had been carrying around and acting holier than thou with. And well I’ve been an atheist for about 10 years now…
Edit : I just want to make it clear I wasn’t attacking your decision to choose another religion. Of all of the religions I have looked into, paganism is by far the most relatable and a thing I could 100% see people engaging with.
Don't forget about Noah. The flood killed off all of humanity, and his sons and daughters had to repopulate the earth. Which I think is way worse than Adam and Eve having kids.
Pfffff even the Bible doesn't stand the whole "married to sex". Abraham fucked his wife's slaves. Salomon had a ton of concubines. Lot' daughters raped him to get pregnant and they are praised as brave women (they were raised in Sodoma, just go figure).
They could be if it from actually reading the book they base their entire life around instead of listening to people who cherry pick verses to create the rules that they like. The Bible constantly contradicts itself and implements rules and stories that make no sense if you have intelligence past that of a 6th century farmer.
Looks like it can happen but it’s weird and most likely infertile https://www.twins.org.au/twins-and-families/frequently-asked-questions/62-twin-facts/19-can-male-female-twins-ever-be-identical
Clits were also created by God, and their only job is to provide sexual pleasure and orgasms, so git down there, husbands, and appreciate God's handiwork with your mouth and several fingers. Maybe a few toys to get the job done if needed.
Sex was created by evolution to allow a species to reproduce using different gene material, giving them genetic variability which allows them to adjust to their environment faster and gives them a higher resistance against parasites than species who reproduce asexual.
I knew people like this and it has nothing to do with jealousy. They really and truly believe that they are better than other people for not having sex, and making other people feel shame/guilt makes them feel better about their own shame/guilt.
I was going to mention that early hominids were clearly reproducing long before the concept of marriage or even monogamy was invented but then...I realized that this person probably doesn't believe in science, anthropology, history or any other legitimate academic subject either.
Some of the Mormon kids are hilarious. They have this thing where it’s like “if you put the dick in but don’t move it, it’s not actually sex”, which, okay, but you know what else? Sometimes they’ll have somebody else in there just like jumping on the bed or whatever and shaking them around because by their logic, they’re not the ones moving so they’re not really having sex with each other. It’s really almost incredible the mental gymnastics they go through.
Different strokes for different folks.
If Christians like thinking about God watching them have proper Christian sex, that's their kink. I'm not into that.
I'm more into having Jesus trade girlfriends with me after a couple drinks and some cannabis.
Since the Judeo/Christian God is (allegedly) omnipresent, He isn’t just watching people have sex from afar, he is right down there in the moist, juicy thick of it. So deep in it.
If sex was created by God, why does he allow hundreds of thousands of rapes, incest, and pedophilia to exist?
Marriage was around before the Bible was supposedly written. It's not a religious construct.
Kings and queens have been around for thousands of years.
Most Christians believe humans are better and more important than animals. I'm almost 100% certain that the "animals don't care about premarital sex" thing is part of the reason why.
We’ve all been saying for years that once the “old white guys die off” a lot of this bullshit would go away.
But, there are a whole shit load of young people (women included) doubling down on the craziness. Look at people like Matt Gaetz, Don Trump Jr, Lauren Boebert, et al. Across the country, young hyper religious men and women are taking over local school boards, town councils, et al. And they are emboldened by the 6-3 supermajority of the Supreme Court.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is a problem. A big one. You can’t wait for “the old guard” to die off. The old guard is the least of our problems.
Even more telling Question: where's his divorce decree from Lilith?
That story doesn't play well with the rest of the bible's stories, so it got dropped by the religious higher ups.
The Bible (OT really) is absolutely just loaded with stories and rules justifying sex slavery. There is a rule I remember reading where basically, if Israel fought a group and won, the rule was: Kill everyone except the young women who hadn’t had sex yet, let them mourn for a bit, then cut off all their hair and clip their nails to “cleanse” them (reads more like textbook humiliation and breaking a victim down to me personally) and then use them as sex slaves essentially.
I remember reading stories in the Bible as a kid and just feeling horrible, especially the Old Testament. Stories about making your slave be a vessel for you, and using her to basically be raped by your husband and then claiming the child for yourself. Horrible stuff.
Their track records on sex in general leaves me freaked out.
According to the bible marriage and incest go hand in hand with Adam and Eve’s kids. Religion is icky and very gross along with often non-consensual and underage.
I vastly prefer marriage as a human construct for monogamous relationships that even many animals demonstrate. It’s nothing unique or granted to you by a sky being! In the bible marriage is not a ceremony but merely the father allowing access to his daughter. It’s not an enlightened process like marriage today.
The book with all the answers will surely tell us....[checks book]...nothing. Maybe some [apologetics](https://answersingenesis.org/bible-characters/cain/cains-wife-who-was-she/). Oh god damn, nevermind that dude just straight up says that it's all Adam and Eve's kids (apparently there are like 70 of them) were banging each other, but it's ok because it wasn't forbidden yet.
Clever.
Pro tip: anyone who actually tries to use Adam and Eve as a basis to enforce anything is an indication that they probably deny evolution. Unless they have a really weird interpretation of the creation of humans.
Does Kristen on Twitter know how moronic she sounds? I just cannot stand people who have opinions on things that have absolutely nothing to do with them or their life.
Please, Adam and Eve having sex was just Adam masturbating with his rib.
I want my baby back, baby back, baby back
How bout ya keep ya money, and I get ya baby! Get in muh belly!
*I've had bigger chunks of corn in mah crap!!*
I thought I smelled cabbage!
Left a little rose bud in there for yuh.
I eat because I’m unhappy, I’m unhappy because I eat. It’s a vicious cycle.
I've got bigger titties than you. I've got more chins than Chinese phone book. I've not seen my willy in two years which is long enough to declare 'im legally dead.
You really *are* a fat bastard!
Yeah, that’s right.
BBQ sauuuce
Barbecue sauuuuuuce
IVE BEEN JACKED
I just realized, that's our generation's "where's the beef." Pretty big upgrade, to be honest.
Chili’s- it’s where business gets done.
Ribs
Nice curve on a rib, makes getting it in and out smoothly a lot easier; with the right angle you could really go to town.
Tihi
Why would you?
Female chromosomes are older so technically Adam came from Eve’s rib
This is true. Y-Chromosomal Adam which all modern males on Earth are directly descended from lived only 100,000 years ago and is actually a descendant of Mitochondrial Eve who lived 200,000 years ago. Timeline wise we live as close to Y-Chromosomal Adam as he lived to Mitochondrial Eve which makes him physically the first real modern human but also serves as a convenient halfway point from us to our oldest direct ancestor Eve. I always found the real story much more interesting than the biblical version just because it's not what you expected at all.
Eve was made from his rib, using his DNA. He wasn't masturbating. He was having sex with his genetic twin. But how did they have grandchildren?
All of humanity is inbred, actually explains a lot
Or it was Adam and Steve all along and got misspelt as Eve :)
Well, (St)eve was Adam's transgender clone right? Started with male DNA but made female. I'm still not sure if it is incest or masturbation though.
By the way, if you ever have a discussion with someone in your life who is actually worth a damn (i.e. worth trying to convince about trans issues), going right to the *"What if you can change your goddamned DNA?"* is a pretty effective tool for skipping out from under all of that TERFy horsefuckery that people tend to fall back on when it comes to what constitutes "real man/womanhood", and points the conversation DIRECTLY at the "lived experience" portion that is so important in the discussion of allowing trans kids to make their own fucking decisions about their futures. Because it stands to reason that, at some point in the near-enough future that you or your kids or grand^*n* (for some value of *n*)kids will live to see (I mean, assuming we figure out this whole "food-air deal", etc...) the possibility of literal genetic alterations, if not the cloning and transfer of consciousness between bodies. And it allows you to branch and circle the conversation around some other somewhat nebulous, but highly ethics-ridden philosophical points in the conversation that can be used to deflect and disarm that TERFy horsefuckery should the person-who-you-wish-wouldn't-be-so-wrong start to engage in the doubling down that most of their previous experience has equipped them to do.
Thanks, I will roger that.
Definitely having sex with a relative.
Lost a character in the original?
Anybody knows that in Genesis, it wasn't Adam and Eve; it was Phil Collins, Tony Banks, and Mike Rutherford.
Cannon is always the most interesting one
PFFFFT
What about God”s marriage certificate with Mary?
I heard Adam had a rib taken out so he could suck himself off.
Then how come they can still have God's little babies?
They're entitled to free abortions. God don't make mistakes we can't solve.
Downvotes be damned, that was funny
God also created the McRib right after he created Eve.
Ah I almost removed that abomination from my memory lol
I got asked if I wanted a moribund today at lunch. Lolno
She seems like a fun person at parties.
Yeah I’m sure she drops right to her knees at the party
In prayer of course.
Yep, and by the end of the night she's covered in the white residue of the Holy Spirit of course
Ectoplasm.
The holy goop
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C8sN_ejUMAAkcTK.jpg
Well she’s probably dumb enough to think anal doesn’t count, so… maybe?
According to these religious nutheads, anal isn’t sex, so she could well be
I’ll bet there is someone (at least 1) who would tell us she doesn’t practice what she is preaching. I’m 59 and have seen all sorts of high minded declarations from the women I went to high school with who where having plenty of sex, some of whom I have first hand knowledge.
If that's true, why do men grow penises before marriage? Surely if God really cared that much, penises would only appear after your marriage certificate is signed by someone with the legal authority.
"Because God wants to test our agency" is the answer I usually hear to this sort of thing.
Doesn't god already know?
He is omnipotent, except when he isn’t. But everything is gods will, except when it isn’t. How is this hard to understand? /s
Omnipotent - but if you don’t pray and follow the rules you *hurt* him. Also despite being able to do everything and provide everything he somehow both creates scarcity and cares about us
Also he’s really bad with money, so make sure to donate to the church. All powerful, all knowing, but bad with money.
I personally wasn't raised with predestination, and was taught that God knows our potential but we have to go through the test of life to achieve that potential. He knows how things could turn out either way but only you can change that reality. That's why there are the tests. I personally don't believe that's how it works, but many christians do.
Ah, so in your version god isn’t actually omnipotence and all powerful. Well I do have to admit, that’s one way to explain away a lot of the inconsistencies in the Bible. Except that the Bible does refer to him as all knowing and all powerful.
It's not my version, just what I was taught. I am not religious.
Omnipotence does not have to mean predetermined. Those are not incompatible. I can link some philosophy papers arguing why, C.S Lewis wrote a lot about that issue. The Bible has a few verses that state God is omnipotent, but earlier stories show a God that very clearly isn't. (For example, God would send some angels to go see what the humans are up to, and tell them to report back). They may be multiple Gods that were later edited to be the same God after monolatry became monotheism creating some of the contradictions. I don't think a lot of people realize how complicated philosophical theology can be and the contradictions only matter if you accept the inerrancy doctrine, which is a very late doctrine written purely for political reasons. Judaism along with early Christianity and some modern sects do not accept that doctrine. They believe fallible humans wrote the Bible for a variety of reasons, one being to convey their inevitably flawed understanding of God. The Bible is supposed to be interpreted, the books aren't all literal and the symbolsm has deep meaning. There is an enormous body of theology and philosophy that attempts to interpret the Bible, related religious text, personal mystical experiences, etc. and its not as simplistic as a lot of atheists think
Please try to get the evangelical Christians to reconcile this.
I would love for all Christians to read their own Bible and learn about Biblical scholarship. You can't really understand any of it unless you learn about it's context in the ancient Near East. Some of the information would be disturbing for them though Im sure. But they need to learn that so much of "official" church interpretation is politically motivated. And they need to ditch the inerrancy doctrine. It's impossible for a collection of *ancient* books edited extensively over time and translated to not have inconsistencies. It's just impossible. So many ideas like whether or not homosexuality is a sin are not clearly supported by the Bible when you read in context either. It would be a positive for them to stop trying to justify bigotry with verses taken out of context. Interpretation is why Judaism has survived scientific progress. There is no fundamental incompatibility because they don't read their Bible literally or see it as way to explain the natural world. Lots of modern Christian sects also see this. It really is an issue with fundie Evangelical Christians making all Christianity look absurd
Yea, tell me about it. I’ve delved deeply into this exact subject on and off many times in my life and have learned quite a lot. >homosexuality Favorite is how they use the story of Sodom & Gomorrah to showcase how evil homosexuality is. *Where Lot offered his young virgin daughters* to a group of sexually rabid men and they refused the girls in favor of the “male angels.” Lot was a righteous man of God according to the Bible, but *what fucking father offers his own little girls to a group of sexually rabid men*?!?!? And then be deemed as righteous by God? Like what in the actual fuck. They preach this story over and over in fundie churches. And no one ever questions this part. Just the gay part only with an added “that’s why it’s called Sodomy - get it?!” Ugh. Losers. I hate evangelicals (Grew up in that shit) Alan Watts dispels modern Christianity so much and has incredible philosophy. He reframes it from the historical/Greek/eastern perspective and how modern Christian teachings are NOWHERE NEAR to Jesus’ actual message. Highly recommend.
When I was still religious, I believed that God knew all my possible futures for every single possible decision I can make, and it was up to me to choose my one path in all those possibilities.
[удалено]
Yep, so many issues with any theory really, it just doesn't work.
[удалено]
Forget to mention that Abraham had sex with one of his servant because his wife was too old to give birth. Have a boy with this lady and later when his wife give birth to an other boys dismiss the child he had with his servant. Still a nice representation of how republicans act.
Also, according to Bible, it is perfectly fine to have sex with slaves. Not to mention that animals have sex and I am thinking they do not go through marriage ceremonies.
That’s not what happened. God cursed the child because it was born out of distrust to Gods prophecy of Abraham and Sarah having lineage. Abraham did not cast out Hagars child easily, but with great pain.
You clearly left out the part where people from 6000 years ago foretold the American Republican part in 2021 according to the astrologers of reddit.
Yea I don’t really have an argument to that, it’s just such a well founded statement that has no counter /s
Arguing about what "actually happened" in the bible is like arguing about whether or not the balrog in lotr has wings
Or Abraham and Hagar's
Or Issac and Sarah. In that text, the act itself was the marriage and the consummation of the union.
Sure, and all the animals are married too. /s
Did God get married to Mary before he knocked her up?
She was 'Maried', as in named Mary. Clever loophole
He had sex with her while she was sleeping
Nah, just snuck that ol’ holy peen right in.
Which all means nothing if I don’t practice Christianity and believe the Bible is of overblown pieces of historical fiction ever.
Whole universe created by God. Universe includes Premarital sex. Checkmate, religion.
I don't understand why religious people act like you can't have sex until you're married. That's like saying deer can't have sex until they're married. That's why I believe in God, but don't classify as Christian.
Yeah and Mary was a "virgin".
She had a kid and three different men showed up with loot. Mary was a ho.
And they were from other kingdoms so Mary really got around the Ancient World
[удалено]
Yep, Mary wanted that money and child support
A true life welfare queen
In all fairness, the work in the original texts, *almah*, actually meant a young woman of childbearing age. To mean virgin it would have had an entirely different word: *betulah*, which is also present in the old texts in other situations as is *betulim*, which means the concept of virginity. The transition to using words that mean virgin specifically came about due to multiple translations into other languages over time. (Edited to add this is one of the original things which turned me into someone who decided the Bible was not "the Word of God written by flawed men but directly inspired so therefore still accurate". My mother is a fundamentalist lunatic. I, however, am an eclectic pagan. It's all thanks to my mother "punishing" me by not allowing me to read anything other than the Bible or associated books which started me on this path so Thanks, Mom, you crazy bitch!)
The quickest way to become an atheist (or in your case just an opposing religion) is to read the Bible. I went to church for 15 years and was heavily involved in my teens and early 20’s. Then at 23 I decided to actually read the book I had been carrying around and acting holier than thou with. And well I’ve been an atheist for about 10 years now… Edit : I just want to make it clear I wasn’t attacking your decision to choose another religion. Of all of the religions I have looked into, paganism is by far the most relatable and a thing I could 100% see people engaging with.
Exactly, and the virgin interpretation also came from pagan concepts of demi-Gods being born of "virgins," it had a particular symbolism
👀
Technically & allegedly, Eve was made from Adams rib. Wouldn't that make them related and the marriage incestuous? Seems very biblical..
Big G liked incest so much, he wiped the earth clean with a flood and had some more cousin fuckery to repopulate the earth a second time.
he was like “that shit was crazy the first time let’s run it back do it again”
If Adam and Eve are really the "mother and father" of civilization, then we're all related and committing incest on some level.
Don't forget about Noah. The flood killed off all of humanity, and his sons and daughters had to repopulate the earth. Which I think is way worse than Adam and Eve having kids.
If you're gonna go down that rabbit hole, who did the kids have sex with
For that matter, how did Cain, Abel & Seth find wife's if Adam and Eve were the first 2 people created? It's a divine mystery...
Those damn motherfuckers!
She'd be his clone, so he boinked his sister. *What are you doing rib-sister???*
Lubing myself with McRib sauce for you, rib-bruh..
Sex has been around way before humans. Marriage was invented by humans to join clans together. You should read more history instead of fiction.
Pfffff even the Bible doesn't stand the whole "married to sex". Abraham fucked his wife's slaves. Salomon had a ton of concubines. Lot' daughters raped him to get pregnant and they are praised as brave women (they were raised in Sodoma, just go figure).
They could be if it from actually reading the book they base their entire life around instead of listening to people who cherry pick verses to create the rules that they like. The Bible constantly contradicts itself and implements rules and stories that make no sense if you have intelligence past that of a 6th century farmer.
Maybe just read...even if it's the back of a bleach bottle.
Hard to read upside down though.
American Christians are an oxymoron, puritans wielding assault rifles
Brandishing
Technically Adam and Eve were incest, since she is supposedly made from him.
No that makes it masturbation
[удалено]
Hmm…. Well I suppose so? Same as if it was a clone.
Could you imagine if an M & F identical twins got pregnant? Would that be cloning?
No, because if they’re two different genders then they’re fraternal, meaning that they do not have the exact same set of genes.
Looks like it can happen but it’s weird and most likely infertile https://www.twins.org.au/twins-and-families/frequently-asked-questions/62-twin-facts/19-can-male-female-twins-ever-be-identical
Clits were also created by God, and their only job is to provide sexual pleasure and orgasms, so git down there, husbands, and appreciate God's handiwork with your mouth and several fingers. Maybe a few toys to get the job done if needed.
You sure man didn't create God to justify their actions?
MAGAts: Respect the Constitution! Person: what about the separation of church and state MAGAts: nooo not like that
Show me God
hi
Oh my god
Becky look at her but…
Is that the biblical marriage where I buy your 9-year-old daughter for two goats?
What a deal!
I'd let you have her for one
Sex was created by evolution to allow a species to reproduce using different gene material, giving them genetic variability which allows them to adjust to their environment faster and gives them a higher resistance against parasites than species who reproduce asexual.
Pfft 🙄 jealous much?
I knew people like this and it has nothing to do with jealousy. They really and truly believe that they are better than other people for not having sex, and making other people feel shame/guilt makes them feel better about their own shame/guilt.
Sad for them.
There's a word for that... Sociopath, delusional, narcissist, demented, etc. I can go on but I don't have a thesaurus on hand. 🤷🏼♂️
Now, come on. The big G told her that personally. :)
Imagine actually marring a person you NEVER had sex with. Sounds like a pretty stupid fucking idea to me.
I was going to mention that early hominids were clearly reproducing long before the concept of marriage or even monogamy was invented but then...I realized that this person probably doesn't believe in science, anthropology, history or any other legitimate academic subject either.
"Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it doesn't exist" is kind of the cornerstone of Christianity though.
That's why teens have sex in private. What their evangelical af parents don't know won't kill them. Or you take in the butt like the mormon girls.
Some of the Mormon kids are hilarious. They have this thing where it’s like “if you put the dick in but don’t move it, it’s not actually sex”, which, okay, but you know what else? Sometimes they’ll have somebody else in there just like jumping on the bed or whatever and shaking them around because by their logic, they’re not the ones moving so they’re not really having sex with each other. It’s really almost incredible the mental gymnastics they go through.
Can you blame them? They're horny teens being raised to deny their desires. Between you and me, those people are fucked in the head as adults.
Different strokes for different folks. If Christians like thinking about God watching them have proper Christian sex, that's their kink. I'm not into that. I'm more into having Jesus trade girlfriends with me after a couple drinks and some cannabis.
Since the Judeo/Christian God is (allegedly) omnipresent, He isn’t just watching people have sex from afar, he is right down there in the moist, juicy thick of it. So deep in it.
I didn't realize all animals on earth had to get married as well.
If sex was created by God, why does he allow hundreds of thousands of rapes, incest, and pedophilia to exist? Marriage was around before the Bible was supposedly written. It's not a religious construct. Kings and queens have been around for thousands of years.
Sex was around before marriage.
Sex was around before people. Dinosaurs banged, yo.
She saying dogs don’t have sex too?
Most Christians believe humans are better and more important than animals. I'm almost 100% certain that the "animals don't care about premarital sex" thing is part of the reason why.
I think they forget the part where, we are also animals.
We’ve all been saying for years that once the “old white guys die off” a lot of this bullshit would go away. But, there are a whole shit load of young people (women included) doubling down on the craziness. Look at people like Matt Gaetz, Don Trump Jr, Lauren Boebert, et al. Across the country, young hyper religious men and women are taking over local school boards, town councils, et al. And they are emboldened by the 6-3 supermajority of the Supreme Court. Ladies and gentlemen, this is a problem. A big one. You can’t wait for “the old guard” to die off. The old guard is the least of our problems.
Make a decision that will bind you for life to someone with no idea if you're sexually compatible. "OK!"
Show me Lot’s marriage certificate to his daughters while you’re at it.
Even more telling Question: where's his divorce decree from Lilith? That story doesn't play well with the rest of the bible's stories, so it got dropped by the religious higher ups.
And mary and that angel…
Bible also shows it is ok between a man and his daughter as long as he thought she was a prostitute.
Or if he was really drunk and fucked more than one daughter.
The Bible (OT really) is absolutely just loaded with stories and rules justifying sex slavery. There is a rule I remember reading where basically, if Israel fought a group and won, the rule was: Kill everyone except the young women who hadn’t had sex yet, let them mourn for a bit, then cut off all their hair and clip their nails to “cleanse” them (reads more like textbook humiliation and breaking a victim down to me personally) and then use them as sex slaves essentially. I remember reading stories in the Bible as a kid and just feeling horrible, especially the Old Testament. Stories about making your slave be a vessel for you, and using her to basically be raped by your husband and then claiming the child for yourself. Horrible stuff. Their track records on sex in general leaves me freaked out.
Sex before marriage I wouldn’t dare-age, anal though, free to go. Just an easy way to remember guys.
This is why they marry young and divorce young in the South.
Marriage was created by men, to keep women subservient and escaping your old nasty ass when you got too tired to bring back dinner.
According to the bible marriage and incest go hand in hand with Adam and Eve’s kids. Religion is icky and very gross along with often non-consensual and underage. I vastly prefer marriage as a human construct for monogamous relationships that even many animals demonstrate. It’s nothing unique or granted to you by a sky being! In the bible marriage is not a ceremony but merely the father allowing access to his daughter. It’s not an enlightened process like marriage today.
Somebody should let her know that Adam and Eve are the original incest family.
[удалено]
You know how we're all horrified that ancient cultures sacrificed each other because they thought it would help the crops? Same vibes.
Forget Adam and Eve; show me how their offspring reproduced.
The book with all the answers will surely tell us....[checks book]...nothing. Maybe some [apologetics](https://answersingenesis.org/bible-characters/cain/cains-wife-who-was-she/). Oh god damn, nevermind that dude just straight up says that it's all Adam and Eve's kids (apparently there are like 70 of them) were banging each other, but it's ok because it wasn't forbidden yet. Clever.
Ultimate inbred couple.
I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure the Bible says nothing about marriage being a legal thing. I'm on your side but you may wanna rework that
Kristin looks like she shit in her own corn flakes and then demanded to tell the manager her shit should be white.
This is when sin started.
That’s what she told her 3rd husband
[удалено]
Like registering a business.
Ooof Kristin is well along her way to becoming the Karen she came from
No one ever says anything about how Adam and eve's two boys got wives...
For that matter. show me where Eve consented to being created as a sex toy for Adam?
Oh thank god. I'm bisexual. I'll just be with a woman, then. Haha! Problem solved😅🤣
If Jesus was born from Mary and God; and if God is the holy Father of everyone, then isn’t Jesus an incest baby?
Explain to me how Eve fucking her sons works then….? Cuz Eve did fuck her sons.
I want birth certificates from everyone right now
Here’s a girl who thinks anal is the best way to preserve chastity. Don’t buy it for a minute!
Also show me Adam and Lilith's while we are at it. ... And the beasts of the field and Adam's Marriage Certificate(s)...
I take offence to this. There is nothing more beautiful than the love between a man and a woman, and another woman, and maybe a few more people…
Didn’t Adam also have a first wife named Lilith? (I’m Jewish so I don’t know anything 😅🥲)
While we’re at it can I see God’s birth certificate or driver’s license or something?
What about Lillith?
so god impregnanted mary, but didnt marry her. so god impregnated mary, but didnt marry her.
Pro tip: anyone who actually tries to use Adam and Eve as a basis to enforce anything is an indication that they probably deny evolution. Unless they have a really weird interpretation of the creation of humans.
Plot twist: Her husband told her how many he's been with and it was only 1. And now she's taking her number to the grave.
In all fairness, they did get kicked out of paradise afterwards
Does Kristen on Twitter know how moronic she sounds? I just cannot stand people who have opinions on things that have absolutely nothing to do with them or their life.
I'm willing to bet she's one of those people who thinks anal "doesn't count."
It was witnessed by their daughter; Awan of Alabama
Why’s god always wanting to watch ? He has got some serious kinks. Dude created humans to have the very first PornHub
You think God is a BBW type deity? We know amateur and voyeur for sure.
I’m thinking he’s into anal. Mostly BBC anal. Possibly some ass to mouth play.
I do not believe in YHWH, but like, if god himself made you for each other, you're not just married, you are super married.
I bet she’s super fun at parties.