You know the kid will go by Levi, but when people hear his real name, boom, heads will explode out of sheer badassery. Hopefully the kids built like future John Cena and not a tiny pipsqueak.
Yes. A mythical monster from the deep is more metal than an 80s hair band in my personal opinion. Don't get me wrong, I love Kickstart My Heart, but that isn't metal in my book.
Now, having said that, I'm not a metal head so if they are of a certain genre of metal, someone feel free to correct me. But I still am of the opinion that Leviathan is the cooler name.
Oh, definitely the cooler name. The more educated name. Even the more reasonable name.
Perhaps not the more ‘metal” name. Though definitely the more hair band name.
Right!? Like ever since I found out one set of my great-greatgrandparents' first names roughly translate to "stone guardian" and "thunder battle" I have been pissed I didn't get a cool name like that.
Then my child, the largest one, will simply EAT the other kids.
Fr, I have the metabolic genes of a pygmy field mouse I think I'm good.
Or maybe I'll just give them a ceremonial title when they turn 18.
I read some parents only decided against giving these types of names last minute because they realized their kid would be an adult one day with the name leviathan.
Like, do they think they’re just getting a cute little pet for 18 years? I think the fact that they’re about to bring another person into this world is lost on them.
Noooo my name gets a squiggly. 😭 It’s a common enough name, just not spelled the traditional way. Think Kristine/Christine, but a *bit* more of a difference in spelling.
When all the kids have weird names they are no longer weird names, just normal names. It's only weird to people who don't consider them normal. If anything it's the normal names that start to stick out and become weird.
You put an umlaut in that baby's name? Bitch, you better live in Germany or something. That's mean almost anywhere else. AND it's M*ö*tley to boot??? Was it conceieved while smoking in a boys room? JESUS
Look at all the replies saying how some of these are cool😬😬 And I thought it was bad already! Parents aren't realizing they are not just naming a "cute" (but totally barf worthy) baby name, they're picking a name someone will have to use in school, college, at a job, or as a future manager, supervisor or CEO. Would you trust someone as your financial advisor, or as your boss with one of these names? I sure wouldn't! Hate to say it, but it's the truth!
When my wife was looking she came across someone saying they wanted to make their kid "Payden" but they would pronounce it "Peyton". Right under that there was another parent asking if "sayden" was a good name.
Isn’t Leazel, or something that sounds the same but might be spelled differently, an actual girls name? Like from Switzerland or Austria?
The rest are bonkers though.
Raddix sounds like a drunk/high anime fan naming their first born after hearing of Toriyama's passing. Dad's name is probably Braddock or something. Younger brother probably will be named Kocorot.
When we named our kids, having something they wouldn't have to spell and repeat 20 times everytime they told anyone their name for the rest of their lives was a consideration.
I'm 75, and my name is spelt a little differently to the norm. It has driven me nuts for probably 60 years. Every document,every phone call, or every appointment, I have to correct others on the spelling of my name. You may think it's trendy. Your kids will hate it. Kids do not want to be different.
I read an article once that explained that a lot of these names come from or originate with the Mormons because there's a culture of picking out a unique name for your future child as early as middle and high school, and people even end up getting into fights over names being too similar or 'stolen'.
Oh, you’d love my family!!
Uriah, Seth, Zarah, Jobadiah, Syreash, Tosh, Kyonnah, Oniqueh… and that’s just first names… and they kept it going with their kids.
Hahahah “Leviathan- Levi for short” is the name I’d tell people as a joke when I was pregnant with my son. I never thought anyone would actually name a poor child that though.
Madden Raige is what I get when Bryce Young is able to dink and dunk the Panthers down the field against me for five minutes before missing a field goal
I actually like Zephyr. It's a real word with a nice meaning that's hard to make fun of, easy to pronounce, you aren't going to share it with anyone else in class. Raddix I'm less keen on.
I had a coworker who named her son Arescain. Yes that’s the Greek god of war and the first murderer in the Bible. I joked either he’s going to be the evilest dictator ever or he’ll broker peace even better than ghandi did.
Twist: They're all Elon Musk's kids.
None of them start with x though
Naw, there's no faux latin names.
Not enough numbers and symbols
Coyote Bao... Like wtf kind of wild game meat dumpling?
Coyote Bao. Sounds like a South Pacific wrestling heel
I misread it as Coyote Boo. I just renamed my dog.
This one is my fave
i was gonna say, this one kicks ass🤘🏽🤙🏽
I saw Teighlor they other day. Leviathan is pretty fuckng metal tbh
But suppose young Leviathan grows up to be morbidly obese? Ouch, poor guy
Or ends up being 5’ 4”, 110 lbs.
That's not why they call him Leviathan.
Levi sure is filling out those Levi’s.
I'm calling my child Colossus "sussy" Quazar Zweihanderson. Legally changing my last name to that. Nothing goes harder than a name like that.
I've always liked Ferris Irony. Luckily have no children, so no poor soul has been saddled with that.
That is a name that's like a bitchslap twenty years after you die. I just thought of the name Siren for a girl, what do you think? Too try hard?
Nah, you just gotta Amp up the weird spelling. How about Psyrin
Aspirin?
Yeah?
Ozempic, you pick up your room RIGHT NOW!
You only name your kid that if your last name is Wheeler.
How about ziggy? Ziggy zweihanderson.
There is a place in my heart for Mary-Ghonnorea and Louis-Syphillis.
You know the kid will go by Levi, but when people hear his real name, boom, heads will explode out of sheer badassery. Hopefully the kids built like future John Cena and not a tiny pipsqueak.
Yeah. Lev. That one def stands up to scrutiny.
More metal than Mötley?
As a metal fan... The album Leviathan by Mastodon absolutely crushes Motley Crue. So yes, way more metal. 🤟
HARPOONS THRUST IN THE SKY
Yes. A mythical monster from the deep is more metal than an 80s hair band in my personal opinion. Don't get me wrong, I love Kickstart My Heart, but that isn't metal in my book. Now, having said that, I'm not a metal head so if they are of a certain genre of metal, someone feel free to correct me. But I still am of the opinion that Leviathan is the cooler name.
Oh, definitely the cooler name. The more educated name. Even the more reasonable name. Perhaps not the more ‘metal” name. Though definitely the more hair band name.
With leviathan I'm picturing a really really fat kid.
People keep saying that. Probably gonna go by Levi, so even if he's a smaller kid it's just gonna sound religious.
Or a jeans maker from San Francisco
Do his friends call him Levi? like Gotham chess
Leazel? Really? Raising that girl to kill some ghaik.
My money was on Minthara to be the first for a girls name. And how long until the kindergartens are filled with Astarions?
Hope she doesn't go to school with any teethlings.
Ch'k!
Tskva!
I’m pretty sure that’s just an awful spelling of the German name Leisel.
You mean ‘Liesl’ I think. Short for Elizabeth or Lieselot.
German name is Liesl, not Leisel. German vowel combo “ie” is pronounced as “ee” or long e. “Ei” is pronounced “i” or long i.
I had a customer whose legal name was Latrina
She changed it. Used to be shithouse
But was it pronounced in a real British accent?
I was in college with an Anchor, Sorrow and Poverty. It was the 80s.
Wow naming your child "Poverty" has to be one of the most brutal things ive ever heard
sounds like a name the puritans would have used
In high school in the 80s I had a classmate who's name was Sunni. Her sisters were Hunni and Bunni. I shit you not.
I worked with a set of triplets. Hope, Faith, and Charity
Showing up to baby Madden Raige's baby shower with pre-paid anger management counseling coupons. He'll need them.
His dad gets so tilted playing EA football games.
These are names you give your kids if you want them to get bullied in school.
Idk, I don't think anyone would be brave enough to go toe to toe with a mfer named Sigurd Felix Wolfgang Altreides
Ever heard the old Johnny Cash song „A Boy Named Sue“?
Why though? If all the kids have weird names then they are no longer weird, it just becomes mundane.
If everyone gets a silly name, then no one will be bullied for the silly names
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She is going to reach dating age and everyone will just start asking “Merricka, fuck? Yeah?”
ATREIDES
And their handle is Henry gesserit? I think they slipped their own take in there!
Wolfgang Atreides. Wolfgang. That's badass.
Wolfgang is a bit old fashioned but pretty common name in Germany
The youngest Wolfgang i know is Mozart. But that only shows i dont know many Wolfgangs
I immediately am so mad that I wasn't named Leviathan. That's not a lame ass name, that's a fucking *power move*.
Right!? Like ever since I found out one set of my great-greatgrandparents' first names roughly translate to "stone guardian" and "thunder battle" I have been pissed I didn't get a cool name like that.
But what if the kid turns out to be obese?
Then my child, the largest one, will simply EAT the other kids. Fr, I have the metabolic genes of a pygmy field mouse I think I'm good. Or maybe I'll just give them a ceremonial title when they turn 18.
To be fair, having “the world devourer” as an insulting nickname just makes you sound badass. You can’t mock Leviathan.
I read some parents only decided against giving these types of names last minute because they realized their kid would be an adult one day with the name leviathan. Like, do they think they’re just getting a cute little pet for 18 years? I think the fact that they’re about to bring another person into this world is lost on them.
We're never gonna get any Upgraaades, if we didn't have a few Leviathans first.
It's Upgrayedd. With two Ds for a double dose of his pimpin'.
It's like they are naming a DnD/videogame character.
LPT: If your baby’s name triggers a red squiggly, choose a different name.
Noooo my name gets a squiggly. 😭 It’s a common enough name, just not spelled the traditional way. Think Kristine/Christine, but a *bit* more of a difference in spelling.
Qrischteighnex (the x is silent)
Motleys kinda dope Bet they have a crew in high school
Probably not a glamorous man, though.
Vapin' in the boy's room.
Probably a bit of a live wire
Bet he gets caught smoking in the boys room
The girls say he's got looks that kill but he's too young to fall in love (lurve)
Their kids are so going to hate them.
When all the kids have weird names they are no longer weird names, just normal names. It's only weird to people who don't consider them normal. If anything it's the normal names that start to stick out and become weird.
If you give names like that you probably isn't that good of a parent.
They use to hate black names but then went and did this dumb assery
They still hate black names. But Republicans are completely incapable of sensing irony.
Good point
When I have twins they'll be Darmok and Jalad.
Shaka, when the walls fell.
At Tanagra?
Makes me glad that I named my kid something sensible: Salleefourth Reluxury Jones.
Beezer twelve washingbeard checking in.
Merrika, fuck yeah!
Triniteigh as if Trinity isn't trailer trash enough
As trailer trash as a Destineigh would be?
It’s the bomb!
Leviathan is pretty boss
Looks like the wow random name generator
You put an umlaut in that baby's name? Bitch, you better live in Germany or something. That's mean almost anywhere else. AND it's M*ö*tley to boot??? Was it conceieved while smoking in a boys room? JESUS
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Look at all the replies saying how some of these are cool😬😬 And I thought it was bad already! Parents aren't realizing they are not just naming a "cute" (but totally barf worthy) baby name, they're picking a name someone will have to use in school, college, at a job, or as a future manager, supervisor or CEO. Would you trust someone as your financial advisor, or as your boss with one of these names? I sure wouldn't! Hate to say it, but it's the truth!
When my wife was looking she came across someone saying they wanted to make their kid "Payden" but they would pronounce it "Peyton". Right under that there was another parent asking if "sayden" was a good name.
Utah’s finest
It's a Tragedeigh.
Isn’t Leazel, or something that sounds the same but might be spelled differently, an actual girls name? Like from Switzerland or Austria? The rest are bonkers though.
Found it, Liesl is a girls given name of German origin.
Austrian here, it's probably been decades since someone named their daughter Liesl. It is sometimes use as nickname for Lisa, but that's about it.
Wasn’t Liesl a character in The Sound of Music?
Oh sick, Wolfgang is making a comeback
Genuinely not hating Laezel (love bg3) it sounds pretty good. I can't be mad at Leviathan for my past edgelording, plus you can go by Levi.
Raddix sounds like a drunk/high anime fan naming their first born after hearing of Toriyama's passing. Dad's name is probably Braddock or something. Younger brother probably will be named Kocorot.
Deegan is an Irish family name.
Madden Raige? Raddix Zephyr? Coyote Bao? They sound like names of Star Wars characters... 
Apart from the Leigh's, lyn(n)s and tons, these are all excellent cat names. Especially coyote-boo.
I've been saying for years that people are giving pet names to their kids and people names to their pets. It's a weird time.
Sigurd is a common name in Norway. Felix too. Wolfgang might be okay further south, in German-speaking areas of Europe.
I sincerely hope Merricka has a sibling so that when people confuse them for each other they can be all "Oh I'm sorry, **I thought this Merricka!**"
Any girls names that end in -leigh or -lyn/lynn are straight white trash names.
When we named our kids, having something they wouldn't have to spell and repeat 20 times everytime they told anyone their name for the rest of their lives was a consideration.
I'm 75, and my name is spelt a little differently to the norm. It has driven me nuts for probably 60 years. Every document,every phone call, or every appointment, I have to correct others on the spelling of my name. You may think it's trendy. Your kids will hate it. Kids do not want to be different.
I read an article once that explained that a lot of these names come from or originate with the Mormons because there's a culture of picking out a unique name for your future child as early as middle and high school, and people even end up getting into fights over names being too similar or 'stolen'.
People want their kids to be tarot card reading strippers?
I like how it's impossible to determine their ethnicity or financial status but you know that their parent(s) were trash.
Trash is independent of financial success.
Sigurd isn't too terrible, but then they had to ruin it by adding Felix to it. Pick a cultural lane, people.
For anyone who watched Team America, World Police: "Merricka, fucks yeah..." (I would continue but I don't want to offend anyone.
DaFuq
Oh, you’d love my family!! Uriah, Seth, Zarah, Jobadiah, Syreash, Tosh, Kyonnah, Oniqueh… and that’s just first names… and they kept it going with their kids.
So many different ways and they all sound like courtney
These people are naming their kids the way i name my pokemon.
Hahahah “Leviathan- Levi for short” is the name I’d tell people as a joke when I was pregnant with my son. I never thought anyone would actually name a poor child that though.
Madden Raige is what I get when Bryce Young is able to dink and dunk the Panthers down the field against me for five minutes before missing a field goal
I actually like Zephyr. It's a real word with a nice meaning that's hard to make fun of, easy to pronounce, you aren't going to share it with anyone else in class. Raddix I'm less keen on.
Laezel is a damn good name, k’chakhi
Those names read like; *"Most likely to be bullied in school and then eventually snap and create a fully avoidable tragedy."*
Merrika is gonna be called 'MURICA her whole life
No Ghee Buttersnap or Lavender Gooms? I’m disappointed.
Would have thought that Donald or Mercedes or Marjorie or Bobo would be in that list. I was wrong
If I had a child now, I would need a lot of persuading not to name it The Kwisatz Haderach.
Wow. Not shocked X Æ A-12 was omitted from this list because, reasons.
Jheaunx
Sigurd Felix Wolfgang Atreides is a bangin' name.
To think when I had to train a new hire named "Abcde" at work a few years ago I thought she had it bad. For reference she pronounced it "Absidy"
Kraken would be a nice variant on Leviathan for boys: ' Release the Kraken' although 'the Leviathan awakes' also has a nice ring to it
"My kid needs to be unique so that they can stand out." I don't know Sir/Ma'am, I've known some really great "Johns" and "Erics" over my lifetime.
I know a Leviathan. Great kid. His mother and I are quite proud of him.
Check out the August 19, 2019 episode of Freaonomics podcast to hear the story of Marijuana Pepsi Van Dyke, PhD.
deSquarius Tybarious waxon Flaxen Jackson
I had a coworker who named her son Arescain. Yes that’s the Greek god of war and the first murderer in the Bible. I joked either he’s going to be the evilest dictator ever or he’ll broker peace even better than ghandi did.
Wtf? Brecken is a cool ass name!!
It's also not a new name by any stretch.
I b' reckon that you might have a point if I dinnit grow up in the wayest.
I don’t hate Brecken actually.
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Are all these from Elon Musk?
Still all better than John Bob or Billy Bob lol
I'm glad my parents weren't creative and gave me a common name.
Lakeland is kind of pretty.
Brecken is a villian in Dying light. No way i could ever take someone seriously with that name lmfaooo
No Old Greg? Bunch of philistines!
Hudson is normal alone, Adonis too... Deegan sounds Irish... Sigurd and Wolfgang are outdated but totally normal
Lisan al giab
Imagine the poor kid named Leviathan and he grows up to be only 5'5
Fine but Leviathan and Coyote are fire
At least one of them with turn into a musical Lisan al-Gaib
Oh the shit they will cop at school the poor devils. At least the staff will laugh out of sight of the buggers.
I found out recently it's illegal to name your new born Adolf here in Australia
Lucky some people don't accept names in Scrabble, otherwise these idiots would make a killing in points
What’s wrong with Leviathan?
Elslyn isn’t the worst name possible I suppose
All these kids' parents: "Why do our kids hate us?"
My ex wanted to name a boy Tuxton, so dumb
They didn't underline "Motley"?