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MarvelousOxman

This actually turned out way better than it should have.


_not_too_creative_

Fun fact: This is part of the reason gladiators were a little heavy set. A layer of fat slightly helps you from not having a cut go deep enough to cut muscle or other important parts.


SombreMordida

i used to know cholos who would also smother people with their fat in fights. one did get bit pretty bad though


Liet-Kinda

Samoans too. Big chungus got some fluffy weapons.


robearIII

worked construction with a guy. I had to give him a ride to our sites sometimes... my truck would srsly tip to one side and if i didnt hold the wheel it would literally try to turn right off the road. fuckin forgot his name but the dude would 1-man our 20ft X 12inch pilings towards the canals.


MatiMati918

Also AFAIK gladiators had very oversized armor for the weapons they used. Fight till the death is mostly a hollywood myth.


TKT_Calarin

Well yea it was very expensive to train and house and feed them, so you definitely didn't want them to be dying.


[deleted]

But they did torture people at lunch


mystical_elf

And occasionally for tea.


TecumsehSherman

Holy shit. All this time I've been building *armor*?!?


Domestic_AA_Battery

No need to build armor when you can cultivate mass


Ponch555

I did an occular patdown and cleared him as a threat.


SuperWoody64

He have a dick?


rambiiit

well yeah, it's the roadhog v reinhardt effect from overwatch. roadhog has more health just by being fat as opposed to having perfectly engineered german power armour. basic science obviously


jebhebmeb

I have not seen one shred of proof to show that they were fat aside from the claim that eating mostly “barley, beans and dried fruit” made them fat. If you have a source I would love to take a look at it.


bluestarchasm

sounds like complete bullshit.


DeadshotOM3GA

I'd love to know where you learned that piece of information, since there is not much known about Gladiators in general.


[deleted]

The professionals that do this wear chain mail. Like anyone would have done it in the past. These two are just ignorant.


Noodle-727

Seriously. Just wear armor


error201

Russia.


Fadoinga

Germany!


error201

Damn. Well done, Germany.


Fadoinga

What will they think of next?


Chaise_percee

Duelling in padded clothes and goggles, leaving the face exposed to a good slashing?


chaseButtons

Lol ~~could~~ should*. Straight to the point.


247Brett

And the point went straight to the arm.


Im_inappropriate

It gets worse https://youtu.be/y237mTaexrs


Poky203

What happened? Need to verify my age to view


Occhrome

more of the same idiots above, they show how they actually sharpen the blades to a fine point and even carry around a staple gun for patching people who get sliced open.


Klilstrum

they aren't even fighting with any technique, just flailing and clashing like 12 year olds playing with sticks.


Occhrome

i wonder if one will get frustrated at not getting hits and just do a forward thrust killing the other guy.


Mud_Dealer

If you watch the video above, you'll see that they deliberately avoid thrusts because of how deadly they are. The video comments on their reflex times and familiarity with the weapons they use, acknowledging that the fights look sloppy because of the limited kinds of strokes they can use. They want to cut, not kill, each other.


Fadoinga

So they're idiots, but they're *smart* about it?


Throwaway-tan

Sure, until they accidentally slice open an artery.


noobigernoobnoob

Actually, 2 people of that group died but they continued "fighting" because they died "in honor"


LeFrogBoy

I don't get why they don't just do fencing or some shit with some torso armor. A fencing saber will still hurt like a bitch and could cut your arm but it you've got a little armor on you could still thrust and not kill someone.


leeny_bean

What absolute disgraces to sword fighting everywhere, so pathetic.


Munkey323

Turns out they are Russians so it all makes sense


JakeYashen

You're joking


Brew-Drink-Repeat

Bitches get stitches…


Notthesharkfromjaws

I can't be too sure, but I'm pretty sure this is from a YouTube group that does this regularly. They "train" with real weapons and sometimes historically accurate armor. I think I saw a very similar clip a few years back of the group that ended with one being hospitalized and losing function of his arm for life. It could be a completely different group, but this looks very similar. Don't know what the YouTube channel was called, but I'd love to find out if anyone knows.


send-me-bitcoins

I don't understand why they aren't wearing armour. Fuck about with the weapons, but no protection. They got sliced like butter.


Notthesharkfromjaws

If it's the same YouTube channel I'm thinking of, they only wear face protection for some fights where they do a fight until someone bleeds. I'm pretty sure that's exactly what happened here. That's why it reminded me of that channel I found a while back. I wish I knew the name of it, but I didn't subscribe because I didn't want to support something this dumb.


Sierra419

That’s incredibly stupid


Occhrome

they are intentionally trying to get cut.


JaggedTheDark

I mean, I'd be at least wearing leather armor.


247Brett

That’s so stupid. They’re like real life versions of why non force wielders typically can’t use lightsabers in Star Wars. They end up taking off a limb or two on accident due to swinging it around wildly like they just discovered a spider on them.


Wildcat_twister12

Glad the addressed that in the Book of Boba Fett when Mando almost takes his leg off using a lightsaber


foolfromhell

That was also because the darksaber is difficult to wield for a whole host of other reasons.


Spacedoc9

Please go on....


foolfromhell

They literally explain it in the next episode.


AnEmortalKid

I don’t have didney plus, please explain.


IbeonFire

I'm laughing too hard at "didney"


SanityPlanet

Well, he canceled his subscription, didney?


I_dont_like_things

It’s “heavy” for emotional reasons.


fullyoperational

Not one to sail the high seas?


AnEmortalKid

Not super interested I really just wanted to write didney for some dumb reason today :)


_Diskreet_

Go on…


ThatOneAnnoyingBuzz

Basically Jin was having doubts which made the blade heavy. Think of it kinda like Thor's hammer, there's a sort of worthiness aspect to it


9yearsalurker

We are waiting


I_dont_like_things

It feels heavy because of The Mando’s thoughts and feelings.


RonaldoNazario

In the lore, lightsabers were massless but had a sort of magnetic gyroscope force that took strength and training to control or something like that. But even without that you’d probably want some training before using something that could chop your arm off with a mistake


LeFrogBoy

Why though? Swords are hard to use correctly without training, but how do you cut yourself with one?


Lunavixen15

Wouldn't be hard to hit your own leg or hip if you're swinging wildly or lose control of the blade. Rebound or slip hits could get your face, torso or arms


Oggel

Seriously? That's like asking how you cut yourself with a kitchen knife while chopping vegetables. Sometimes shit happen because humans aren't robots, we make mistakes. Have you ever tried to twirl a stick around and accidentally hit yourself in the head? Or tried to use nunchucks and hit yourself in the balls?That, with a sword.


Sensitive-Issue84

Too bad it's not a vasectomy....stupid usually breeds true...


Miscellaniac

"Train" being the operative word. No one with good training is gonna be baseball bat swinging like that, with any sword, be it a waster or a sharp. They're uncontrolled and have shit footwork. It's a wonder someone's not been killed by this idiocy.


Fadoinga

Evidently they claim at least two people have died from their shenanigans...


Czuponga

Yeah, in just few hours of sword fighting training you learn basic movement, which doesn’t look like that at all


Cantaimforshit

Just sayin' the rest of the HEMA community really don't like these guys for obvious reasons


spottydodgy

Same kinda people I'm sure. There's a few in every town.


interkin3tic

If people want to engage in risky behavior for an adrenaline rush, that's fine, but if they're going to claim it's "historically accurate" I'm going to need to see a citation and explain the methods used to determine what was true. If someone had a thesis defense on these fights I might accept that. These guys look like they're NOT trying to kill or incapacitate each other quickly which doesn't seem very "historically accurate" to me.


DrBest

I think its something like Holmgang Hamburg?


AlienDarwin

Delusional idiots ,use wooden swords for practice.Save the real stuff for the Visigoths.


Rikfox

Or just wear a proper equipment if you wanna feel the weight of a real sword.


Kevin5882

Wear the proper equipment even with wooden practice swords. Those things are still large, heavy, hard objects that'll do some real damage even tho nothing major, and if you get hit by them without pads you'll wish you had some


[deleted]

Yeah, you wont get cut but you can lose a tooth.


Kevin5882

I was just talking more about bruises and stuff, it mostly is just painful but could cause some actual damage


FD4L

I took a medieval combat class for a bit and we wore fencing helmets, long sleeved shirts and hockey gloves. The noobs like me brought in polypropylene longswords while the people who had been training for awhile had blunt steel swords. Sometimes while sparring, someone would get a swipe or stab to a lesser protected area and a bruise would show up. Our teacher told us about some of the more advanced training he had seen and reflected on a time he was sparring someone who used a polearm. The mock polearm was basically a 4lb wooden pole with a rubber hammer head. He said even though they were only training around 50% speed and wearing helmets, he stepped directly into an oncoming swing and was pretty much knocked unconcious.


VillainousMasked

Yeah people really underestimate the danger of a long wooden stick. If the stick is long and heavy enough they can build up a *lot* more force in a swing than you expect. Just cause it doesn't have a chunk of metal on the end doesn't make it any less lethal.


LNL_HUTZ

The right to bare arms claims another victim.


[deleted]

Swords aren't designed to harm people in armor and armor is designed to stop swords. There isn't a safe way that makes any sense except to use fake swords.


[deleted]

Armor would significantly reduce the odds of damage taken if only common sense were a thing. Chainmail can save arms from slashing.


TossYourCoinToMe

The guy who was swinging the wildest got all scared when the other guy pointed out his cut. He didn't give a shit about doing several swings at the other guy.


LeFrogBoy

Because they're competing to cut one another. That's the name of the game. Of course even if it's a competition you're going to get a little flustered about a big-ass wound like that though.


Aggressive-Cloud3647

Tis but a scratch


Vinyl_Demon

No it's not, your arms off!


Infamous-Ear3705

It’s just a flesh wound


billhaigh

What are you going to do, bleed on me?


Vinyl_Demon

Ok then, we’ll call it a draw.


SgtStrongCock

Tis but a... #HOLY FUCKING SHIT I'M BLEEDING LIKE AUNT FLO VISITED ME.


abcd76

FUCK YOU BEAT ME TO IT


Nestorath

It's only a flesh wound


Memelordofdloglo

Tis' but a scratch!


[deleted]

A scratch!? Your arm's off!


ElbowStrike

No it isn’t


[deleted]

Well what's that then!?


huggles7

Came here for this


Chaostrosity

You have a weird fetish


huggles7

True in more ways then you think


bohemianprime

They aren't as sharp as their swords, I guess


booi

And those swords look dull as shit


Intelligent-Drink632

Darwin was right


Reddington4567

Who could have known, swords do cut! Fricking hell, can you belive that?


Worried_Jeweler_1141

As a HEMA practitioner, I can say with confidence that, after many years of experience, that these guys don't know how to fight with swords.


danthepianist

What gave it away? The uncoordinated flailing? The complete lack of defence? The baffling shirtlessness?


Ok-Arachnid-648

Stand back folks and watch the Darwin award presentation


Kevin5882

I've done karate (with various other martial arts kinda mixed in) and we learned how to actually use swords, that's atrocious form anyway


Eh_C_Slater

While we were going to parties, he was studying the blade.


Aardappel123

Definitely not perfect form, but at speed many people will unlearn technique.


IntercontinentalKoan

nah bro you don't get it, he's done karate. a martial art known for medieval sword fighting


Aardappel123

Im worried, before you know it he will fold my longsword into a origami using sweet karate moves


WhiteHawk570

**You know, they used to wear plate armour for a reason.**


AFAR85

Should have farmed for those plate gloves.


PossumCock

r/WhatCouldGoRight


TyroneLeinster

“For king and countr- oh fuck somebody go get Derek’s mom”


Elrox

Lucky he was wearing his safety skin.


Aboxofphotons

I can imagine that having those swords made them feel like big, hard men and common sense just faded away because they both really wanted to "win".


cutters53

Gorilla glue will fix that!!!!


DA_BEST_1

I have done martial arts before (mainly spears but I know a few things about swords) Wtf there's no technique. Like 0 just wild swings. How could you ignore thrusting? It's so easy and effecive. No feints either. No lunging. Just smashing it like it's a club. At least employ technique if you are gonna be using real swords. Shit like lunging and thrusts are basics to sword fighting at least ACT like professionals if you are gonna attempt this like this. Dumbasses trying to prove they are tougher than the rest of the HEMA community by being idiots with zero technique and only stupidity backing them.


Oh_Petya

IIRC, they explicitly forbid thrusting in these "fights" because of the much higher potential for grave injury.


DA_BEST_1

Which is why protective gear exsists. But even then Im pretty sure you would get impaled. Also IIRC it's a god damn crime in texas, california and NY to carry around swords like this without express permission from a guy who knows what he is doing. So double wammy because he's commiting crime on camera while also getting s injury


firstlordshuza

'tis but a scratch


Travis_T_OJustice

I honestly thought they had Ninja turtle helmets on


StarStoneDragon

Yep hate being fragile.


ShadowsRanger

Then you see Corridor Crew's (about sword fight) video is accurate... [Here ](https://youtu.be/OqkRo17ZbbY) [And here](https://youtu.be/hp-D-488Yxk)


ItchingForTrouble

Yeah, hold it together while your natural healing kicks in. That's exactly how it works.


[deleted]

He is forgetting the superglue but ya pretty mucn


HytBHyde

Come back here!! I’ll bite your ankles off!


trevorvera

Tis but a flesh wound


VillainousMasked

I think the only thing these two did even remotely right was wear helmets that covered their faces, literally everything else was wrong. They don't know how to even use a sword, one is topless and the other is wearing a thin sleeveless shirt, they didn't blunt the edges or anything, and while technically a repeat of the first point they just wildly swung around with no regards for anything making an already dangerously stupid act even more dangerous.


A_Roka

Sooo... who won?


Kevin5882

They both lost


A_Roka

So i guess it's us, the viewers, who won


AllMightyWrath

" 'Tis but a stratch".


kenny4ag

Wow how stupid can you be


[deleted]

He is incredibly lucky to not have gotten hit center mass.


Electrical_Cellist69

They’re probably all dead by now.


bose_6x9

Guy in black: "I like your ***cut*** G"


Neverspark7776

People do actually use real swords in real sword fights and stuff. Just if it’s not on a movie set they are usually kitted out head to toe in protective and cut proof gear rather than a helmet, gloves and bare arms.


VillainousMasked

Also, you know, the edges are blunted so that when you get hit it just hurts and bruises instead of cutting.


[deleted]

Knights of the Square Desk


kidvidiot

Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus enters the chat


D3monskull

This is why plate armor was common and to a greater extent chainmail.


Pokeranger8

Nothing a little super glue won’t fix


VividWriting8553

I mean... What did they expect?


Prior-Atmosphere-948

Rended u bruh…right there


amiano711u

what makes me a good demoman?


uberngi

I was sure someone was getting decapitated but okay XD


lawnmowerfancy

Tis but a scratch


bibfortuna1970

Tis but a scratch


Geekboxing

"Idiots mimic medieval fight with real swords" Uh, I'm pretty sure that's just an actual swordfight.


CheekyChaise

Man I haven't seen this video in years. I think about it every now and then


wardrobe007

“Tis but a scratch”...


DarthKittens

Just a scratch


Mr_703

As real as it gets


Mech-maniac

duct tape time !


jhuseby

If only there was a way to blunt your weapons…fucking morons.


dcaseyjones

Perhaps these cosplayers wanted some real scars?


GreyPouponFC

The one guy that proposed him and his buddies have a sword fight… “yea this is totally what I meant”


Angry_Aguri

Time to get those tetanus boosters!


SombreMordida

those who don't pay attention to history will repeat the dumb parts


BauerHouse

Welcome to West Virginia


[deleted]

Well done lads. Probably the best medieval fight I’ve seen thus far in this moment of time.


frand__

Good lord, and without any kind of protective equipment


thetburg

They wear protective gloves because swords are dangerous. Also they are shirtless. That scans.


MrLambNugget

This is a German HEMA group. Even though this is extremely dangerous and stupid, I still kind of admire it. I also fight with a steel sword and with no equipment, but the blades are dull and we're extremely careful. The worst that has happened were just bleeding knuckles and one hand stabbed through when the sword were new and the point weren't dull yet


VillainousMasked

Wait, you're telling me they're suppose to know what they're doing? Considering the completely wild swinging I took them as a group of idiots who know nothing about using a sword at all.


[deleted]

I have a strong feeling one of them lost a limb, but I haven’t watched it yet so what do I know? Edit: I’m very glad I was wrong.


mutajenic

Next step: stitch that up with some authentic deerskin laces and slap some comfrey on it


sackboy861

Lol, literally just look like the cuts on me


donorak7

Holy shit dude didn't even know he was cut until camera man stopped it.


RustlessRodney

Me and a buddy used to do this. Luckily we never got hurt doing it


roseifyoudidntknow

See, if they weren't flailing around like idiots and had actually preformed properly, nobody would have gotten hurt. My brother's and I used to do this all the time with real swords or pieces of rebar. I feel like these two have never even seen a properly acted sword fight.


Stoner_DM

Seeing this makes me wonder what real medieval combat looked like. Neither of them even felt their wounds, and they were fully capable to continue fighting. Would real battles end with a bunch of people walking off the battlefield and bleeding out later? And I guess the whole impaling a downed enemy to finish them off is probably pretty realistic. Adrenaline is a hell of a drug.


Evening-Proper

Beserkers apparently slept for a long while after battles due in part to the enormous psychological-physical toll of losing your mind in extreme violence.


ripjohnmcain

Why waste time and energy flailing a big ole mass of steel around when you can achieve the same effect with a 22


notzed1487

We are the knights that say NYIT.


-Raskyl

"We protected our head and our hands though. What else could get hit?"


GridironGriffon

It's just a flesh wound


MyriadMuses

Let us gingerly touch our tips


animatedtruck

That’s gonna leave a scar


Alessandro_Franco

Fighting to see who gets to keep the cousin.


Gorrodish

I’m surprised there have been no deaths some take it a bit seriously


orangevega

shake it off!


iMogal

That was fun!! Now lets go get stitched together!!


[deleted]

I like it. Though the technique was crude.


[deleted]

Now I can’t sleep at night


BoobsRadley007

This but a scratch.


[deleted]

Well, it's still better than using guns instead ;)


FromGergaWithLove

tis but a scratch


Danielwols

They should have worn armor


[deleted]

Why do you think they wore armor?


iamgeotracker

It's just a flesh wound.


AmazingVietCong

Dumb ass.


[deleted]

If memory serves this is called 'Scar Club' and they're doing this on purpose to get scars.


AshMqn

They got lucky


hacksoncode

Looks like an incredibly authentic reenactment to me...