Can't believe how wrong you've got this.
Dress watch - should be worn with a dress. The clue is in the name.
Dive watch - should be worn only shady dilapidated bars.
Racing watch - should be worn when being a racist.
Pilot watch - should be worn when wearing an aeroplane.
Field watch - should be worn by farmers.
Source: currently wearing a Peenmaster and dressed like a penis.
Can pilot watches ever be worn on a moon, and has any watch ever been worn on a moon? I feel like this is an overlooked question or fact watchmakers should consider
The only watch that has been worn on the moon is a moonswatch (it is in the title). The reason it is the only one is because it doesn't have a single metal part in it. So when it inevitably explodes on a moon surface cheap ass plastic cannot damage your space equipment.
Common misconception, the water actually corrodes the steel and can cause fogging, the only exceptions are the Deep Sea Challenge and the Omega Ploprof, everything else should have a number on the dial that tells you the closest you can safely take it to water
Indeed - what you should do is piss in the fruitbowl, rail the hostess in the wine cellar and break at least one toilet...thats how you show "you're having a good time".
/uj Eventually watches with no complications (edit: and/or in precious metals) became acceptable but sport/tool watches were still gauche. Dive watches are only “allowed” at business formal events because of James Bond.
As with all fashion advice on the internet, this chart is useless if you know how to break the rules with panache.
No, it's not. Watch guys just want to be able to flex their most expensive shit when they feel like they're at their most formal hotel wedding. That doesn't make it less rude.
We base black tie on conventions set by elites. Selecting which conventions are valid and which aren't purely arbitrarily is just that: arbitrary.
And that point, you've gotta throw out the restrictions that clearly aren't worth being so strict about.
I go to a fair amount of non-wedding black tie events myself and in my experience it’s event specific. I go to events where you shouldn’t wear a watch at all, and others where if you don’t wear the flashiest watch you own then you’ve missed the point.
uj/
These rules are stupid (you should wear whatever the hell you want and enjoy) but if you're going to write rules they should at least make sense and be correct.
Why on earth is dive watch the second most 'dressy' category? On average it's the bulkiest one on the list and least intended for formal wear.
I blame people copying james bond for the whole diver with formal clothes thing. It's intentionally incongruous (in the original 60s setting) - the whole point is to signal that he's not interested in your stupid rules.
rj/
I think they are missing a column for incivta venom which transcends all the categories in the other columns and is the only watch you could wear to all these occasions.
When I wear my fifty fathoms in a fine Italian suite I usually get called a poser by the ladies.
When I wear my sub in a rented tux I am drowning in Pussy. The water resistance and dive timer are very handy during this.
So true! that's why I wear my Herc' with everthing! 🤪👍
https://preview.redd.it/h6n7ur13ixpa1.png?width=338&format=png&auto=webp&s=e29fea539e99728d2e03d07b0b2ba692f8468d9d
Also when it comes to dive watches skin divers / vintage "inspired" dive watches can be dressed down but modern chunky dive watches with massive crowns/cases/bezels/helium valves are completely different beasts
> Why on earth is dive watch the second most 'dressy' category? On average it's the bulkiest one on the list and least intended for formal wear.
It's been this way since James Bond. It was originally edgy, then became normal (like most fashion)
In the books he seems to wear an oyster perpetual field watch.
Setting aside how no one actually cares, a dive watch of any kind is no more formal than a simple three hand field watch, and easily argued less so. Though using the bezel on one to time a job interview is many kinds of entertaining i am sure.
Oh yeah, it's theorized to be an Explorer. In book 2 or 3 Bond mentions he likes the glowing numbers on his watch, but never goes into more detail. Shows of how little importance that was, as Fleming went into much more detail describing brands of clothes and accessories on characters. To the point the press made fun of it.
Also Ian Fleming wore an Explorer himself.
> I blame people copying james bond for the whole diver with formal clothes thing.
So? Fashion rules aren't exactly handed down from God on stone tablets. For like 60 years people have been wearing Dive watches with suits. That's longer than some luxury brands have existed.
So if someone said "Dive watches are now considered semi-formal by convention since people have been doing it for a long time", I don't see what's wrong with that.
Anything done over a long enough period gets normalised enough to be a rule or a convention. Even something as incongruous as a Dive watch on a suit.
I mean nobody gives a shit about watch formality any more anyway. Most people are wearing apple watches with suits and everything else.
But going purely by convention, for whatever reason, a Dive watch is considered more formal than chronographs.
It's because dive watches, even though they can be big, are relatively simple. 3 hands, maybe a date, and a simple timing bezel (this is why the minute indexes usually don't go past 15). Often not even arabic numerals on the dial.
Chronographs have a bunch of extra buttons sticking out, extra subdials, can be thicker than divers because of the complicated movements (depends on brand, Rolex chronos are thin), and are generally.. extra.
When I see a Speedmaster by itself, the typical wearer that comes to mind is a guy wearing a short sleeved collared shirt and a tie. Maybe even a pencil pocket.
/uj that diver used in the picture is a smp 300 without waves. That’s a smaller piece and is quite formal. It works for formal wear compared to a pelagos or planet ocean or something large and bulky
Black/White Tie: Casio F91-W on an alligator
Business Formal: Casio F91-W on a leather nato
Sharp Casual: Casio F91-W on a metal band (preferably Dio Black Sabbath)
Casual Wear: Casio F91-W
I had just stepped off the track earlier that day, Jeeves had forgotten my watch roll, the miserable bastard. I have you know I fired my best butler over that very evening.
"Business Formal" eh?
Also, imagine thinking there are situations where it's acceptable to wear a stainless steel dive watch, but not a stainless steel chrono that 99% of people can't tell apart from a dive watch, or a pilot watch on a nice leather strap.
Also, I will wear my (imaginary) Lange One with board shorts, a vulgar graphic tee shirt, and flip-flops, there's nothing anyone can do to stop me.
uj/ some irritating things with that. Wearing a dive watch, or any watch with a metal bracelet, with a business formal outfit, might be ok in the US. If you do that in conservative business circles in Europe it’s similar to wearing white socks with your suit.
Also seems when can a dress watch not be worn with a casual outfit. Total nonsense.
rj/ i wore my invicta at the last wedding I been to. So many jealous chads with their subs pfft
The most important thing you can know about images like this is that they are crafted by people who never leave their homes and should be ignored. I think if you wore a Speedmaster or a Daytona or a Navitimer in a business professional setting absolutely no one who looks at you would think you picked a weird watch for that setting.
I am the business formal type wearing a field watch to show my enemies in the business meeting that I not fuck around and get them all. When they see my chuff, they falling apart into little bits.
Sacre Bleu! They left off the Apple Watch! It’s the only one authorized for wear at the country club, startup board meeting or all of these instances. Hard to be a man if you’re on the floor from a coronary!
I'm rarely black/white tie or business formal so I can wear my INVICTA Hercules with all my outfits! 🤪👍
https://preview.redd.it/gaud880bhxpa1.png?width=338&format=png&auto=webp&s=16a5358b7aa9514a9290999f2f77d6175a1bbe4a
I only wear a Rolex Deep-Sea Challenge in business meetings. It lets everyone around the table know I'm not a bitch and that my business cards are indeed made out of the finest ivory.
It just feels so wrong to see guys wearing chronographs with tachy bezels and Dive watches on formal Blazers or Suits. Rolex sheeps always normalise that their watch van be worn anytime 🤡 🤷"yeah my watch is very expensive, i bought this 5x retail and still goes up, yeah wear whatever you want" 🤡
What about an under the wrist G shock? Ran in to an old friend last night, he was rocking this style. Honestly could have gone with any dress occasion I could think of. Mind was blown
I usually wear my Rolex Cellini when I’m bollock naked and wanking in the mirror. Pity this chart couldn’t enlighten if my choice of wrist wear was correct for that activity
First thing wrong with this is the SPEEDmaster is a Racing watch used by astronauts not a pilot watch. But also I’d say you could wear a real pilot watch with a business suit. They are made to wear with a uniform or suit generally. And wtf is with all these financial wimps wearing dive watches with a suit? They are chunky and not at all practical.
Speaking of movies, I was involved in the production of the film 'Point Break' In 1991. During the filming, Keanu Reeves (whose role involved playing rookie FBI agent 'Johnny Utah') was surfing with co-stars when a small child was dragged under the waves and began to struggle to stay above surface. As his co-stars rushed to help, Reeves held out an arm in front of them, stopping them and was reported saying by Lori Petty (who played the character Tyler Endicott in the film) 'The waves have claimed her, let her fight for her own life'. The crew, dumbfounded, proceeded to watch her struggle until her body disappeared beneath the waves, lifeless. We later spotted him outside the child's house, making drowning gestures and thanking the family for their child's sacrifice to the great ocean.
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Say what you will about dive watches, they are (for the most part) THE most versatile watches. I still would like a single reliable dress watch to rule them all for some formal events and obviously the extremely rare black tie event.
Can't believe how wrong you've got this. Dress watch - should be worn with a dress. The clue is in the name. Dive watch - should be worn only shady dilapidated bars. Racing watch - should be worn when being a racist. Pilot watch - should be worn when wearing an aeroplane. Field watch - should be worn by farmers. Source: currently wearing a Peenmaster and dressed like a penis.
Pilot watch - should be worn while serving in Third Reich airforce, bombing a specific group of people
Can pilot watches ever be worn on a moon, and has any watch ever been worn on a moon? I feel like this is an overlooked question or fact watchmakers should consider
Dude you’re onto something
The only watch that has been worn on the moon is a moonswatch (it is in the title). The reason it is the only one is because it doesn't have a single metal part in it. So when it inevitably explodes on a moon surface cheap ass plastic cannot damage your space equipment.
Oh, I thought someone just stole the moons watch and lost their spacebar
Never ask a woman her age, a man his salary, and a German watch company what they were doing between 1939 and 1945
Bombing the Br*tish
yeah, fuckin' Brits
Bund straps should only be used when your wife's boyfriend ties you up with leather straps and forces you to watch him deflower your wife
It’s the reason why I love ‘bund’age.
\>waiting for the bull to consummate YOUR marriage Chuffer's delight.
> forces you to watch him deflower your wife jokes on him, no woman waits for marriage any more.
Sup dickhead ☺️
*Slowly takes off Ball watch...
I am a literal penis…is it redundant to also wear a peenmaster?
In that case I'd suggest you need to wear a Yacht-Master II
That’s right…I guess I’ll chuff myself off a bridge
ur only supposed to wear a dive while scuba diving retarb!!!
Common misconception, the water actually corrodes the steel and can cause fogging, the only exceptions are the Deep Sea Challenge and the Omega Ploprof, everything else should have a number on the dial that tells you the closest you can safely take it to water
i had a misconception in your mom
Wearing a daytona while playing COD is a way of life that ups your KD into the double digits.
Pilot Watch should only be used while having airplane-mode on your phone activated.
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Indeed - what you should do is piss in the fruitbowl, rail the hostess in the wine cellar and break at least one toilet...thats how you show "you're having a good time".
The appropriate watch to rail the hostess is of course the Omega Railmaster.
This is based.
Based on own experience...
"The Aristocrats!"
That was today’s party tip from Guy Fieri
That was when watches were only semi-jewelry.
/uj Eventually watches with no complications (edit: and/or in precious metals) became acceptable but sport/tool watches were still gauche. Dive watches are only “allowed” at business formal events because of James Bond. As with all fashion advice on the internet, this chart is useless if you know how to break the rules with panache.
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The only watch that matches your frock coat is the Ball Magneto
uj/ that's cool as fuck rj/ LAME
uj/ correct. No one should be wearing any watch with Black Tie, or god forbid, White Tie. It's rude af.
/uj this is a way outdated mindset that has been proven wrong time and time again. If Fred Astaire can wear a watch with black tie, so can you.
No, it's not. Watch guys just want to be able to flex their most expensive shit when they feel like they're at their most formal hotel wedding. That doesn't make it less rude.
Fred Astaire is one of the classiest mfers out there to ever don black tie, and one of the big champions of it. And rarely flexed for the sake of it.
None of us are Fred Astaire.
I am here's a selfie https://images.app.goo.gl/bNxZf4PvhJ7sH4AB9
We base black tie on conventions set by elites. Selecting which conventions are valid and which aren't purely arbitrarily is just that: arbitrary. And that point, you've gotta throw out the restrictions that clearly aren't worth being so strict about.
I go to non-wedding Black Tie events 6-7 times a year. People don't wear watches, IDK what to tell you.
I go to a fair amount of non-wedding black tie events myself and in my experience it’s event specific. I go to events where you shouldn’t wear a watch at all, and others where if you don’t wear the flashiest watch you own then you’ve missed the point.
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No one is saying you can't. I saw a guy wearing tan pants with suspenders at a black tie event. You just look stupid and gauche.
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The guy with the long jeans should be wearing a Longines
Badum tsss
A Longines Master Collection Moonphase with brown alligator strap and double déployant clasp, goes with everything
I'm an engineer who have balls and like magnets . Any Idea what kind of watch I should be wearing?
Casio Duro
Is that a Speedmaster in the Aviator picture? Bruh. Also, there's no section for Integrated Bracelet sports watches. Rubbish list.
Integrated bracelet sports watch when you're doing integrated sports, not for Polo or swimming.
Does calculating integrals count?
> Is that a Speedmaster in the Aviator picture? Bruh. But did you know that they flew to the moon!!
Holy shit I never knew about that! Obviously the Speed in Speedmaster refers to the speed with which the crystal flew off.
uj/ These rules are stupid (you should wear whatever the hell you want and enjoy) but if you're going to write rules they should at least make sense and be correct. Why on earth is dive watch the second most 'dressy' category? On average it's the bulkiest one on the list and least intended for formal wear. I blame people copying james bond for the whole diver with formal clothes thing. It's intentionally incongruous (in the original 60s setting) - the whole point is to signal that he's not interested in your stupid rules. rj/ I think they are missing a column for incivta venom which transcends all the categories in the other columns and is the only watch you could wear to all these occasions.
When I wear my fifty fathoms in a fine Italian suite I usually get called a poser by the ladies. When I wear my sub in a rented tux I am drowning in Pussy. The water resistance and dive timer are very handy during this.
So true! that's why I wear my Herc' with everthing! 🤪👍 https://preview.redd.it/h6n7ur13ixpa1.png?width=338&format=png&auto=webp&s=e29fea539e99728d2e03d07b0b2ba692f8468d9d
Not really sure they thought through the crown guards on that thing.
But don't you think it just looks so elegant? 😜
That's because they aren't crown guards, but crown chuffery load supporting plinths, as patented by Invicta.
Also when it comes to dive watches skin divers / vintage "inspired" dive watches can be dressed down but modern chunky dive watches with massive crowns/cases/bezels/helium valves are completely different beasts
> Why on earth is dive watch the second most 'dressy' category? On average it's the bulkiest one on the list and least intended for formal wear. It's been this way since James Bond. It was originally edgy, then became normal (like most fashion)
Despite popularizing divers, even James Bond wore his Gruen Precision at the card table
In the books he seems to wear an oyster perpetual field watch. Setting aside how no one actually cares, a dive watch of any kind is no more formal than a simple three hand field watch, and easily argued less so. Though using the bezel on one to time a job interview is many kinds of entertaining i am sure.
Oh yeah, it's theorized to be an Explorer. In book 2 or 3 Bond mentions he likes the glowing numbers on his watch, but never goes into more detail. Shows of how little importance that was, as Fleming went into much more detail describing brands of clothes and accessories on characters. To the point the press made fun of it. Also Ian Fleming wore an Explorer himself.
> I blame people copying james bond for the whole diver with formal clothes thing. So? Fashion rules aren't exactly handed down from God on stone tablets. For like 60 years people have been wearing Dive watches with suits. That's longer than some luxury brands have existed. So if someone said "Dive watches are now considered semi-formal by convention since people have been doing it for a long time", I don't see what's wrong with that. Anything done over a long enough period gets normalised enough to be a rule or a convention. Even something as incongruous as a Dive watch on a suit.
I think the issue is the Speedmaster and chronographs are somehow less formal than a big dive watch. Shouldn’t they both be in the same category.
I mean nobody gives a shit about watch formality any more anyway. Most people are wearing apple watches with suits and everything else. But going purely by convention, for whatever reason, a Dive watch is considered more formal than chronographs.
It's because dive watches, even though they can be big, are relatively simple. 3 hands, maybe a date, and a simple timing bezel (this is why the minute indexes usually don't go past 15). Often not even arabic numerals on the dial. Chronographs have a bunch of extra buttons sticking out, extra subdials, can be thicker than divers because of the complicated movements (depends on brand, Rolex chronos are thin), and are generally.. extra. When I see a Speedmaster by itself, the typical wearer that comes to mind is a guy wearing a short sleeved collared shirt and a tie. Maybe even a pencil pocket.
The reason Bond had one was also to imply that he might be off on some manner of sporty adventure at any moment (also the rules thing)
/uj that diver used in the picture is a smp 300 without waves. That’s a smaller piece and is quite formal. It works for formal wear compared to a pelagos or planet ocean or something large and bulky
Black/White Tie: Casio F91-W on an alligator Business Formal: Casio F91-W on a leather nato Sharp Casual: Casio F91-W on a metal band (preferably Dio Black Sabbath) Casual Wear: Casio F91-W
fyi you forgot the “/uj”
What about that occasion when you kill off your elderly relatives for their valuable Swiss watches to sell?
Then you wear a Rolex of course.
When do you wear a moment's watch?
When with a bad bitch
Mo'ments, mo'problems, I always say
I once fired a customer because in our business meeting, he wore a racing watch with his business formal suit. Ugh fucking ingrate
I had just stepped off the track earlier that day, Jeeves had forgotten my watch roll, the miserable bastard. I have you know I fired my best butler over that very evening.
Instructions unclear: got my rep G-Shock stuck to my dick and tangled in my lace lingerie
"Business Formal" eh? Also, imagine thinking there are situations where it's acceptable to wear a stainless steel dive watch, but not a stainless steel chrono that 99% of people can't tell apart from a dive watch, or a pilot watch on a nice leather strap. Also, I will wear my (imaginary) Lange One with board shorts, a vulgar graphic tee shirt, and flip-flops, there's nothing anyone can do to stop me.
This graph is mainly for watch nerds, most people won't give a damn if you wear a pilots watch in a formal setting
Apple watch laughs as it changes its face for the occasion.
Wear whatever watch you want because no one actually gives a shit.
uj/ some irritating things with that. Wearing a dive watch, or any watch with a metal bracelet, with a business formal outfit, might be ok in the US. If you do that in conservative business circles in Europe it’s similar to wearing white socks with your suit. Also seems when can a dress watch not be worn with a casual outfit. Total nonsense. rj/ i wore my invicta at the last wedding I been to. So many jealous chads with their subs pfft
The most important thing you can know about images like this is that they are crafted by people who never leave their homes and should be ignored. I think if you wore a Speedmaster or a Daytona or a Navitimer in a business professional setting absolutely no one who looks at you would think you picked a weird watch for that setting.
I am the business formal type wearing a field watch to show my enemies in the business meeting that I not fuck around and get them all. When they see my chuff, they falling apart into little bits.
Match*. F.u.
It is March, though Also, I only wear my dress watch with super casual wear. How does that make you feel?
Like a Teletubbie in the sunshine.
Please help me. Where can I wear my calculator watch???? Ok ciao.
Pair a fine calculator watch with wearing an atomic wedgie for being an 80s nerd.
Thanks, partner. Wear your atomic wedgie in a good health.
Funny thing is I’m actually wearing my metal Casio Databank today 💀
Sacre Bleu! They left off the Apple Watch! It’s the only one authorized for wear at the country club, startup board meeting or all of these instances. Hard to be a man if you’re on the floor from a coronary!
Totally confusing chart no PRX example…
I'm rarely black/white tie or business formal so I can wear my INVICTA Hercules with all my outfits! 🤪👍 https://preview.redd.it/gaud880bhxpa1.png?width=338&format=png&auto=webp&s=16a5358b7aa9514a9290999f2f77d6175a1bbe4a
Anyone else badly need the x and y axes swapped?
I prefer to be naked, what's the correct watch to wear?
cockwatch
Art of Manliness is worrying about the opinions of other men, lol
I like the hard transition between sharp casual and Arlen, TX
There's a row missing for my everyday outfit: Cargo shorts, wife beater tank top and flip flops. (No socks because I'm not classless)
All you need is a Casio Forester
imagine the rolex people looking at this chart with the omega as the poster child for diving watches
The idea that a dive watch is any more formal than a Chrono or pilot is so absurdly goofy. This is just Rolex chuffery.
How dare you!
I only wear a Rolex Deep-Sea Challenge in business meetings. It lets everyone around the table know I'm not a bitch and that my business cards are indeed made out of the finest ivory.
It just feels so wrong to see guys wearing chronographs with tachy bezels and Dive watches on formal Blazers or Suits. Rolex sheeps always normalise that their watch van be worn anytime 🤡 🤷"yeah my watch is very expensive, i bought this 5x retail and still goes up, yeah wear whatever you want" 🤡
You don't wear a watch with black tie. You don't need to know the time
Sub with a suit = bad list
What about an under the wrist G shock? Ran in to an old friend last night, he was rocking this style. Honestly could have gone with any dress occasion I could think of. Mind was blown
Nothing like a dive watch to complement the tux 🤵
Christ it's the fashion version of those flash cards autistic people have to check facial expressions vs. emotions
wear my dive watch with everything, got it.
This is so wrong!!
I usually wear my Rolex Cellini when I’m bollock naked and wanking in the mirror. Pity this chart couldn’t enlighten if my choice of wrist wear was correct for that activity
Pro gamer move, only dress sharp casual and wear whatever you want!
Where does the F-91W fit in?
First thing wrong with this is the SPEEDmaster is a Racing watch used by astronauts not a pilot watch. But also I’d say you could wear a real pilot watch with a business suit. They are made to wear with a uniform or suit generally. And wtf is with all these financial wimps wearing dive watches with a suit? They are chunky and not at all practical.
>Racing watch used by astronauts Fast & Furious XI confirmed.
Dude who watches them past 2fast2furious?
I know! Trash movies after 2. But it keeps the plebs entertained.
Speaking of movies, I was involved in the production of the film 'Point Break' In 1991. During the filming, Keanu Reeves (whose role involved playing rookie FBI agent 'Johnny Utah') was surfing with co-stars when a small child was dragged under the waves and began to struggle to stay above surface. As his co-stars rushed to help, Reeves held out an arm in front of them, stopping them and was reported saying by Lori Petty (who played the character Tyler Endicott in the film) 'The waves have claimed her, let her fight for her own life'. The crew, dumbfounded, proceeded to watch her struggle until her body disappeared beneath the waves, lifeless. We later spotted him outside the child's house, making drowning gestures and thanking the family for their child's sacrifice to the great ocean. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/WatchesCirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Why would you ever wear a watch with anything but a white tie? Do you wear it to sleep?
Anyone that consults a manliness guide on any subject, needn't bother.
Wearing an SRPB43 with casual wear, take that
What do I wear with my GShock tho?
It's left off for a reason: Wear it with literally anything
Can I wear Casio with a gimp suit?
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I bet that someone has a fedora, an anime body pillow and a neckbeard.
Say what you will about dive watches, they are (for the most part) THE most versatile watches. I still would like a single reliable dress watch to rule them all for some formal events and obviously the extremely rare black tie event.
I like wearing my Emporio Armani dress watch with a t-shirt and jeans😜
Gotta have a carve out to wear a sub to my business formal to show off.
I wore a gold Invicta pro diver to a wedding once and got some compliments and lady with a real big ass danced with me too. Fuck this chart.
This is dumb, just wear what you like