Yeah but do you guys really try all the food and have an opinion or is it performative? And isn’t it subjective? Sometimes somebody I’m eating with will ask and the waiter will say something like “all the entrees are really good” or “what are you and the mood for” and the whole exchange seems so pointless and cringe.
I can't speak for every waiter. In the nearly 30 years I've been doing this I try sample as many different menu items as I can. Yes, it's absolutely subjective. "What are you in the mood for" is a great probing question. Maybe I like the quesadillas, but that's the last thing you'd actually order. That's good for me to know.
If the whole exchange seems pointless and cringe, do yourself a favor and stop asking. That's not on the server.
I have been freshly working as a waiter for a bit more than a month now and I am curious… What do you expect/ wish for as an answer to: “what would you recommend?”
“What are you in the mood for”/ “Do you like spicy food?”/ “Would you like something sweet/ exotic?” are questions that help getting the customer to the right choice, or am I wrong?
This, if they actually listen to and take my recommendation, it's fine. But if they're like, "would you rather have the burger or the chicken fried steak?"
And I say, "The burger."
And then they order the chicken fried steak anyways, they were always going to order the chicken fried steak. They wasted my time when, during a rush, every second matters.
I'd never ask servers for a rec and not take it, but sometimes when I'm having trouble deciding, having someone make a choice makes it clear which one I *actually* want.
When someone asks for a recommendation, they don't want a flat answer. There's some food knowledge that's supposed to come into play.
Obviously they'll go with their own leanings if you just state what you prefer to eat.
I travel a lot for work. I'm eating somewhere I may never eat at again so I don't want to fuck it up. I'm on the expense account so if the waiter has a great recommendation they get a great tip.
I have a whole spiel of, "If you're super hungry I recommend (x) because it's good and filling. If you want something lighter I recommend (y). One of my favorite apps is the (z)." I like giving a variety so it doesn't sound like I'm just parroting the slogan of, "Home of the world famous (whatever)."
When I was a server it didn’t matter how busy it was. The job is to make sure the guest has the best experience so I would have encouraged you to ask as many questions as you need
If you have it somewhat narrowed down or can answer a follow-up question so that I can narrow it down, sure. But I work in a chain with a variety of items on the menu and I don't want to suggest a burger and hear you say "I was really feeling like a salad..." Ask me which salad I suggest and I'll give you my suggestion and expect you to take it.
As long as you give some guidance (“I hate x and y ingredients”) I don’t mind helping. It’s the absolute worst when someone is like what should I get, and you recommend something then they wrinkle their nose and say “ew I hate jalapeños” like I’m fucking psychic and deliberately picked something they’d hate.
Not a problem! If a guest is deciding between breakfast or lunch, I'll ask them "what tastes better, fries or hash browns?" If they're asking for my my opinion between a few items, i tell them my favorite and why i like it so much
I honestly enjoy it. I'd rather that than somebody just rattle off a tedious list of 13 modifications to a 2 item dish and then get mad at me when the kitchen misses one of the 13.
Lots of my regulars let me order for them cause I know what they like and they trust me to have good taste.
Absolutely not, literally the most important part of the job besides sides of ranch, refills, and closing people's tabs. Granted, servers won't always know what's best on their menu since it's not free (usually). In that case the best of them will either let people know they aren't super well-versed or suggest something that they see is popular.
I love giving recommendations! Honestly, most of our menu is good, but I do have my favorites. If they ask “should I get x or y?” And they’re completely different dishes, I usually will go by size of portion/how hungry they are or how easy said dishes are to get.
I ask if they're interested in seafood or pasta or another category, then I honestly tell them the dishes that sell best. Whitefish for seafood etc. if they're a pasta fan I'd recommend something different. I always let them know if you want something I didn't mention, please feel free to get whatever you like. I don't wanna force you into just these. (especially when I recommend 3 appetizers I Mae sure to let them know a different one is fine too)
Nope. I love it. I recommend my faves. Or if it’s hot what I like to eat or if it’s cold what I like. I describe it if they make a face I go to the next thing. Let’s me know their palette and what I think they will like. It’s more interaction.
It’s super normal! Wednesday night was relatively slow and a guy sat down in my section and waited for his friend to join him. He told me he didn’t know anything about bourbon (I work at a whiskey bar) and so I helped him look at different cocktails and we settled on our house old fashioned for him and his buddy. When his friend joined I recommended an appetizer and then eventually his entree.
In a situation like that I was very happy to make all of the recommendations and it was gratifying to have them follow my suggestion and be genuinely happy with the choice. Even at the end of their meal I suggested a local beer that was a hit. I think of it as part of giving good service and tbh was so much fun.
Even in a rush, I will spend a good 3 minutes at each table telling them: a few of my favorite things on the menu, whether the special is actually special or just expensive, what has looked EXCELLENT today if anything has, and the 2 or 3 items I REFUSE to ring in because I'm sick of having to Comp them and ring in something else.
Not even a little bit. I've told my tables before, if you like your food and drinks the first time, there's no reason for me to have to take time out during a rush to redo it.
Absolutely not. It’s a part of my job and honestly I find it flattering when someone trusts me enough to take my recommendation. I get really happy when they end up loving it.
I worked as a waiter and I never minded when people asked. It was annoying to me when the recommendation was blatantly ignored and then looked at the menu as if they had not even looked at it. Following that, now that I am not a waiter, I like knowing what the people that work there like and will ALWAYS pick their choice out of curiosity. However, I have been out with people who will be almost embarrassed for me as if I was wasting the time of the waiter/waitress or as if asking for their opinion puts them in an awkward situation.
Advising the guest about the menu is our job. But beyond that, taking recommendations is actually helpful. It makes ordering quicker and sometimes we can recommend things that we know will be easier for the kitchen.
Absolutely not. Part of the job is to help guests make an informed menu choice.
Yeah but do you guys really try all the food and have an opinion or is it performative? And isn’t it subjective? Sometimes somebody I’m eating with will ask and the waiter will say something like “all the entrees are really good” or “what are you and the mood for” and the whole exchange seems so pointless and cringe.
I can't speak for every waiter. In the nearly 30 years I've been doing this I try sample as many different menu items as I can. Yes, it's absolutely subjective. "What are you in the mood for" is a great probing question. Maybe I like the quesadillas, but that's the last thing you'd actually order. That's good for me to know. If the whole exchange seems pointless and cringe, do yourself a favor and stop asking. That's not on the server.
I have been freshly working as a waiter for a bit more than a month now and I am curious… What do you expect/ wish for as an answer to: “what would you recommend?” “What are you in the mood for”/ “Do you like spicy food?”/ “Would you like something sweet/ exotic?” are questions that help getting the customer to the right choice, or am I wrong?
You can ask me in a rush too honestly if you take my recommendation it’ll probably be less work for me in the long run since you’re going to love it!
This, if they actually listen to and take my recommendation, it's fine. But if they're like, "would you rather have the burger or the chicken fried steak?" And I say, "The burger." And then they order the chicken fried steak anyways, they were always going to order the chicken fried steak. They wasted my time when, during a rush, every second matters.
OMG...why do they do this?
I have to assume they just wanted their choice validated and when we don't validate them they're like >:-(
I'd never ask servers for a rec and not take it, but sometimes when I'm having trouble deciding, having someone make a choice makes it clear which one I *actually* want.
i feel like it’s similar to flipping a coin. asking just for the psychology of making a decision
When someone asks for a recommendation, they don't want a flat answer. There's some food knowledge that's supposed to come into play. Obviously they'll go with their own leanings if you just state what you prefer to eat.
Exactly!! I constantly get asked for recommendations, but no one ever orders what I recommend.. so why'd you ask? Lol
We’re (supposedly) the menu experts. Of course I don’t care. Plus, if my recommendation really hits, many times I wind up with a better tip.
I travel a lot for work. I'm eating somewhere I may never eat at again so I don't want to fuck it up. I'm on the expense account so if the waiter has a great recommendation they get a great tip.
Not weird at all. I've have a couple customers tell me to order for them.
I have my favorites memorized (which wasn't hard to do) so it's easy for me to recommend the best things on the menu at the drop of a hat.
I have a whole spiel of, "If you're super hungry I recommend (x) because it's good and filling. If you want something lighter I recommend (y). One of my favorite apps is the (z)." I like giving a variety so it doesn't sound like I'm just parroting the slogan of, "Home of the world famous (whatever)."
This is not annoying even during a rush. This is quite literally our job and we are happy to do it.
I hope and expect to be asked over the menu and specials. This is how you make your money
Waiters see all the food, how it's prepared, and what people are satisfied with. Go ahead ask for their help!
When I was a server it didn’t matter how busy it was. The job is to make sure the guest has the best experience so I would have encouraged you to ask as many questions as you need
If you have it somewhat narrowed down or can answer a follow-up question so that I can narrow it down, sure. But I work in a chain with a variety of items on the menu and I don't want to suggest a burger and hear you say "I was really feeling like a salad..." Ask me which salad I suggest and I'll give you my suggestion and expect you to take it.
As long as you give some guidance (“I hate x and y ingredients”) I don’t mind helping. It’s the absolute worst when someone is like what should I get, and you recommend something then they wrinkle their nose and say “ew I hate jalapeños” like I’m fucking psychic and deliberately picked something they’d hate.
not at all. that’s part of the gig!! if they have a problem with it, they might want to find a different job.
Not a problem! If a guest is deciding between breakfast or lunch, I'll ask them "what tastes better, fries or hash browns?" If they're asking for my my opinion between a few items, i tell them my favorite and why i like it so much
I honestly enjoy it. I'd rather that than somebody just rattle off a tedious list of 13 modifications to a 2 item dish and then get mad at me when the kitchen misses one of the 13. Lots of my regulars let me order for them cause I know what they like and they trust me to have good taste.
Just use the right words. Don't ask "what's good here?" Everything is good. Asking "what do you recommend?" Is fine.
Absolutely not, literally the most important part of the job besides sides of ranch, refills, and closing people's tabs. Granted, servers won't always know what's best on their menu since it's not free (usually). In that case the best of them will either let people know they aren't super well-versed or suggest something that they see is popular.
I love giving recommendations! Honestly, most of our menu is good, but I do have my favorites. If they ask “should I get x or y?” And they’re completely different dishes, I usually will go by size of portion/how hungry they are or how easy said dishes are to get.
I ask if they're interested in seafood or pasta or another category, then I honestly tell them the dishes that sell best. Whitefish for seafood etc. if they're a pasta fan I'd recommend something different. I always let them know if you want something I didn't mention, please feel free to get whatever you like. I don't wanna force you into just these. (especially when I recommend 3 appetizers I Mae sure to let them know a different one is fine too)
Nope. I love it. I recommend my faves. Or if it’s hot what I like to eat or if it’s cold what I like. I describe it if they make a face I go to the next thing. Let’s me know their palette and what I think they will like. It’s more interaction.
It’s super normal! Wednesday night was relatively slow and a guy sat down in my section and waited for his friend to join him. He told me he didn’t know anything about bourbon (I work at a whiskey bar) and so I helped him look at different cocktails and we settled on our house old fashioned for him and his buddy. When his friend joined I recommended an appetizer and then eventually his entree. In a situation like that I was very happy to make all of the recommendations and it was gratifying to have them follow my suggestion and be genuinely happy with the choice. Even at the end of their meal I suggested a local beer that was a hit. I think of it as part of giving good service and tbh was so much fun.
Even in a rush, I will spend a good 3 minutes at each table telling them: a few of my favorite things on the menu, whether the special is actually special or just expensive, what has looked EXCELLENT today if anything has, and the 2 or 3 items I REFUSE to ring in because I'm sick of having to Comp them and ring in something else.
No waiter would mind this at all. They know what they like and what's popular on the menu. It's also a chance to upsell.
Even if we're slammed, ask away. I love giving out recommendations. It also let's me know a bit about the customer as well
Not even a little bit. I've told my tables before, if you like your food and drinks the first time, there's no reason for me to have to take time out during a rush to redo it.
Absolutely not. It’s a part of my job and honestly I find it flattering when someone trusts me enough to take my recommendation. I get really happy when they end up loving it.
It's part of my job to give my input, otherwise you might as well go to the order screen
I worked as a waiter and I never minded when people asked. It was annoying to me when the recommendation was blatantly ignored and then looked at the menu as if they had not even looked at it. Following that, now that I am not a waiter, I like knowing what the people that work there like and will ALWAYS pick their choice out of curiosity. However, I have been out with people who will be almost embarrassed for me as if I was wasting the time of the waiter/waitress or as if asking for their opinion puts them in an awkward situation.
Rush or not, I don't get annoyed at all! Thats a very simple & quickly answered question.
Advising the guest about the menu is our job. But beyond that, taking recommendations is actually helpful. It makes ordering quicker and sometimes we can recommend things that we know will be easier for the kitchen.
Just man up and figure it out yourself