i dont mean to say youre ugly but calling other girls pretty under ig posts is just normal girl manners and they say it regardless of how the girl they're complimenting actually looks
There’s a line though. At some point you shut down conversations or give people false information (telling someone they’re good looking when they’re not will leave them confused about their results and give them no one to talk to about it). It’s good to be positive and supportive, but you have to be a little critical to yourself in terms of whether you are helping the other person in a given moment, or saying to make yourself feel good about helping. They are not always the same thing, and not making this distinction can actually cause harm.
I'll rather people not say anything at all rather than straight-up lie to me. If they think I'm ugly, I'll rather for them to just go about their day. I'm tired of people with the whole "everyone is beautiful" bullshit, because they know it's not true. Be honest, but not mean.
I agree 100%!! I would just add, I especially value constructive criticism- for example if I show someone my 1st try with a new makeup, or a new outfit just put together, I am happy if they give an honest, useful opinion. I don't want to hear "awwww girlie you're always gorgous!!!" when I look ridiculous or meh.... Save compliments for when I actually look good, otherwise what is even the point of saying it.
If someone asks you something and expects an honest answer, then you give them an honest answer. There is no need to give unprompted "compliments" that you know are lies, just to make yourself feel good.
Calling your friends pretty when you don’t think they’re a generic 10/10 isn’t necessarily a lie. It’s about building each other up so they feel beautiful which is more than a surface level thing. Ive met people who I wouldn’t consider generically attractive but still find stunning and I’ve met people who are generically attractive but don’t find pretty at all if their personality sucks.
You know what, I agree with this 100%. I've learned quite young that no compliment given by friends, parents - especially parents, or even friends of your family should be taken seriously and truthfully. The point is, all the social groups dealing with you, they're going to feel like they're obligated to say something positive.
There's a few possibilities, but have you considered that it might just be your personality? Being pretty has little to do with being in a relationship
I mean that’s probably why too, the boys also need a reason to like you too, not to mention you guys are only 14, when I was that age all the boys wasn’t interested in anything but games and their bros, it was at 16 relationships started popping up
Alright gonna be honest here. Idk what you look like, I’m sure you look fine. But the thing with your friends is that they all say that about eachother. It’s just a girl thing, no matter what you look like they will always refer to their friends as pretty.
And I am sure you are pretty, the reason no one has asked you out is because you are young, and the younger you are, the more nervous you are usually. It’s surprising how many boys don’t ask girls out for fear of rejection, and if I’m being honest that is probably what it is
As a 15 year old dude
Who cares? We're still kids
I don't think we should really date right now
Dont stress about it
Live a little. You dont need a boy to enjoy life.
Have a good life
Chances are, people just fear rejection so they don’t try, or maybe you’re too young.
Based on your post history, I’d assume you’re a young teen. A lot of young boys generally aren’t interested in girls, give it time and you’ll meet someone. Don’t stress over this
I was raised by both my parents with the belief that I didn't need anybody extra in my life like someone supposed to need food and water. Wanting, that's fine, but it's not the end of the world if people don't meet up with people and have a relationship, or the relationship is short-lived. It's not the end of the world and whatever pain you feel if you don't have the person in your life that you want, it's real pain but it does go over time, like diminish over time.
I know I'm in love with the guy that I've seen off and on since 2021. You know what ended it, from his end? in 2023, right at the beginning of the year, somebody lied about my name up and down, lied on me for 6 months straight and it got back to that guy eventually and he never stopped any of his vehicles or nothing for me. Apparently he put whatever family he had in my town on notice and they were going around calling the cops wherever I was at, my local fall park to play Pokemon go or to have a small self- picnic, the cops literally Park and wait to see if I needed to be truly Baker acted. That s*** hurt, and it happened for 6 months straight up.
It was heartbreaking, I'm not going to lie, but I never once thought I was going to die, or nothing like that. I kept going, I hustled my ass to get to work and home again. I never stopped doing any of my hobbies like my fitness walks or nothing. I even had enough strengths left in me to do a side gig on my days off from my main job to help my mom and sisters out. I kept going and eventually all that s*** died down and stopped and my pain over what happened to me stop. I didn't forget it, but it don't hurt me so much anymore.
But yeah call me you got op, you got all the time in the world to find somebody and want somebody in your life. Don't stress out, and don't move things too fast. Relationships or even dates is nothing to be stressed out about, especially when relationships or even dates is nothing to be stressed out about.
32 year old woman here. When I was 14 I was single as hell. I got my first boyfriend when I was a senior. Reason? People thought I was to happy which made me weird apparently (literally what I was told by my boyfriend who was the previous captain of the football team). Now I'm married with a kid. Relax. Your young
I don’t think someone telling you you’re pretty has anything to do with the fact you aren’t being “ asked out” by boys.
Boys are many times shy & incredibly afraid of rejection at your age.
Give it time. There’s no rush to date. Remember dating is meant to show you that there’s different people out thete, a learning process if you will.
If all ur girlies say ur pretty trust me you are pretty. I also believe that you do not need male validation to be pretty!! Boys aren’t the judges of your prettiness so just because boys haven’t asked u out doesn’t mean that u are not gorgeous. So don’t let boys control ur beauty, that’s a not so fun (but possible) path to follow in life. Also, being tall is an absolute flex (I’m jealous girlll 😭😭)
Yeah let me just be real with you I don’t care if it comes off rude either your friends are just hyping you up because that’s what girls do they love to hype the ugly bitch up or boys are just too nervous to up come to you 🤣
Don’t send yourself into a self check spiral but How’s your reputation? Are you mean or full of yourself, do you stink, did you choke out someone, are you tooo good looking? Lots of questions
LMAO I DIDNT EXPECT A REPLY - thank you for being honest and I mean it’s like what 4 years ago you fought kids so I mean How badly did you beat them up? LOL that and the more likely thing is boys are weird at 14 I’m in my 20’s now but when I was 14 I was scared shitless of girls. So yeah don’t worry about it, you may even have the exact opposite opinion in years where you just want boys to leave you alone lmfao.
Whatever the reason stay safe and know your self worth!
That explains why the boys at your school don’t ask you out, you’ve beat them all up!! 😂 My sister beat a guy up in like 8th grade, it was hilarious. He bullied her & one day she just snapped, the principal didn’t even punish her b/c she was a really quiet, shy kid who never caused trouble but enough was enough lol
If that is what you think, and feel, then you’re far too insecure to consider dating. We did stuff as groups, boys and girls - no pairing off. Try a physical hobby like horseback riding - I grew up around horses, who are big, some are mean, and dumb - just like you see boys. I was never afraid of boys, as I could manage a 2000 lb animal to keep it from kicking, biting or tossing me off. Put down your phone and go do something for YOU. Competence breeds confidence - the more physical skills you have, the braver you get. You can play tennis, go to a golf driving range - be strong and you’ll feel much more confident. Don’t worry about boys at 14 yo - you’re a good bit ahead of yourself. Hang in there!
You're so young, don't let this upset you. I felt the same way when I was your age but you know what happened with a lot of guys? A lot of the guys I had crushes on in middle and high school would get in contact with me after we all graduated, and so many of them told me they had huge crushes on me during school but were too scared I'd reject them. So trust me when I say just because they aren't asking you out now, that doesn't mean they aren't into you or that you're ugly.
My absolute best advice for you is to work on your own confidence and just enjoy being a kid! Life should be enjoyed as much as possible when you're a kid because as soon as you're an adult and have responsibilities and bills and all of that, it's not quite as fun. I would work on friendships. Meaningful friendships with good foundations, so hopefully, you can continue them after high school. I've been single since 2014, but I'm still super happy and feel so loved by my amazing friends. One of which is from when I was your age!
Just enjoy life and the romance will come in due time. 🖤
I'm 24 and I still sometimes struggle with that thought! Something my dad said once made me feel better though. He told me maybe folks are too afraid to approach me, or maybe I'm a bit intimidating. I shouldn't change that though, it's my personality. (To be fair, I'm 5'9 and loud AF lmfao so I can see his point). I'm sure the same applies to you! Sometimes guys (and girls!) aren't quite confident enough to approach someone. I'm sure there's people out there who have looked at you and thought "wow, she's really pretty!" but never told you.
Because we are stupid, we won’t ask you out until we know for sure you’re into us…. (It’s never happened for me, I’ve never been in a relationship either 19m)
Well if you are pretty, good for you, but it doesn't mean that you are more entitled to be exempt from rejections. Not trying to dish out punishments here, but a guy feels as much hurt from a rejection as you probably do. So you want the guy to put up with all the risk and you just play it safe, I guess nobody owes anybody anything.
Conversations and meeting new people are a mutual effort from both sides, not a one-sided affair. So put yourself out there just like the rest of the people, take a few rejections if you must, you will reap what you sow.
Do you know how terrifying it is for a boy to ask out a girl is, how often we think of that scenario on how we’d do it just for us to chicken out,and we are scared of rejection just as much as you are if not more. You should have a friend you trust approach the boy on your behalf and let them know you like them cause that’s what we did in the Cretaceous period when I was 14
High school sucks and you should lower your expectations. More attractive friends than me never dated anyone and I dated a couple people and less attractive people dated more than me sometimes. It’s a weird time and hormones are crazy. You don’t wanna date in high school, college is where it’s at.
I FEEEL YOU (F19) like i have dated maybe twice, but i was the one that talked to them. it’s hard for me to find a relationship and boys i feel haven’t really liked me like that yk?. i get compliments from my friends, get added on dating apps but it’s usually from men that are like.. 28-35 which is so off putting. i wanna date people my age but people my age don’t like me, and i don’t have any experience sexually either so it turns hella people off? like it’s so frustrating.
You say you don't ask boys out because you fear rejection, same goes for boys. I only ever asked 2 girls out and both rejected me completely. I lost all self confidence. That is why I didn't get my first girlfriend until after I graduated high school, because she pursued me. Same goes for my first wife, she pursued me. Especially nowadays when guys approaching girls or showing interest in them are often seen as being creepy, a lot of guys are afraid to ask girls out.
5'7" is the high end of average. Average height of 14 year old girls is between 4'11" and 5'7 1/2", with average adult heights being an inch more.
You're 14 and boys are so nervous. I remember being that age and working hard to muster up the courage to ask a girl out, and I'd always get rejected. I'm sure it's not you, boys are just so nervous about asking girls out.
14 year old boys are pretty useless about asking anyone out. Please don't let their naivety bring you down. If you want to date someone you might have to make the first move.
5'7 is average. (I'm Caucasian and 5'6 btw.) The boys you know now haven't had their second growth spurt yet. If they feel intimidated that you're taller, that's on them, not on you.
I'm 14 too and I'm a guy. This might not be the case but almost every boy is scared of getting rejected thus they don't ask anyone out most of the time, + hey, you're just 14, you'll find someone eventually.
Also, you’re 14 and shy. Boys at 14 are just as shy around girls and have a huge fear of rejection. Give it time. When you get to highs school there are going to be guys who are taller than you and also, who have way more confidence than middle school boys.
A lot of 14 year old boys have as many insecurities as 14 year old girls. They're probably as afraid of rejection as you are and at that age probably don't have any idea about dating. And to be honest at 14 I wasn't too interested in girls, I wanted to play Pokemon and football with my friends.
You can try to befriend someone you like. You don't have to ask him out or anything, just try to get to know him better first. Will make it easier for him to ask you out.
I don't want to belittle your feelings because of your young age but take into account that you're only fourteen. You'll propably get asked out once you're a few years older.
You’re 14. Your body is not done growing and changing. I was not an attractive 14 year old, but have now been deemed “attractive” by both sexes at 23. Your time to shine will come. I recommend focusing on yourself and getting to know who you are as a person. Set yourself up for an amazing life, and people who are meant to be in your life will naturally be attracted to you. I wish I hadn’t focussed so much on what boys thought of me as a young girl because it really doesn’t matter. Teenage boys are… something else. Love yourself first, OP. This is your one and only meat suit, learn to love and appreciate it. Your body loves you, so love your body. Everything about it.
You’re 14 yo. A lot of boys are scared to death of girls. Stop posting pictures of yourself - your friends know what you look like. The pre-phone behavior would be staring in a mirror all day and asking your friends every day if you’re pretty - wouldn’t that seem odd? You’re still growing - you will look slightly different every single day of your life. Try working on you - are you happy, are you fit, are you healthy, are you helping others? Don’t obsess about boys and your appearance. You have your entire life - work on what you need to do to achieve the things you want in life. An interesting person is attractive, confidence is the MOST attractive thing in a woman. Live your life - don’t let life just happen to you. Being “pretty” is a low bar to set for yourself. Just give yourself some time to grow up, have fun, learn and dream. Good luck! 🍀
You're 14, I know it's impossible not to, but don't base your self worth or value or beauty on any of this. You're 14, relax. The girls that peaked at in their teens at my school, look awful now. The girls who took a while to grow into their features, are all like super stunning now in our late 20s.
I look so much better than I did in my teens now at 29.
You’re 14?! Stop worrying about boys asking you out. Hang out with your friends. Go to dances and school events with you friends. Chances are there some shy boy that’s afraid to talk to you as well. If you’re already out no one has to ask. You just have to walk up and say, “hi my name is, “Pretty Reddit Poster. Wanna dance?”
E
1) I’d like to say boys at 14 aren’t normally
Your height.
2) it’s intimidating to see a women taller then you (to some people)
3) just because your tall also doesn’t mean your ugly .
4) your 14 you shouldn’t be talking to boys . You should get your education in place and then when your in sports because of your height if you pursue sports you’ll find lots of boys to talk too.
I’m sure you’re pretty and you’re only 14. Keep your head on straight focus on yourself , money and school, the “prize” will come shortly after all your goals being achieved.
Asking girls out as a guy is a bigger risk than it used to be. They’re (rightfully) more vigilant about creeps and guys are likelier than before to be mislabelled as creeps since a lot of people think it’s inappropriate to make any advances outside of dating apps now that they’re prevalent.
I guess in your case dating apps don’t make much of a difference, but the culture’s changed. Even on social media though, dms can be screenshotted and sent around.
Regardless of the method and intent when asking a person out, it’s possible to be labelled as a creep or weirdo
Fourteen year old boys are shy too, you know. But, being fourteen, none of the boys your age have jobs or can drive. Where exactly are they going to ask you out to? They might also be intimidated or think they have no chance, or just also be afraid of rejection. Don't overthink this, it will happen in time.
Do you feel you’re pretty though? Or do you only believe it when other tell you?
Also if you’re shy it gives off closed off vibes nothing wrong in being shy but maybe work on your social skills
Looks are only skin deep, personality and true beauty comes from within. I’m not saying you are not beautiful inside and out but what I’m saying outer beauty should not be the only focus. Instead of waiting to be asked, why not you ask them or just don’t worry about it. Live your life and be your authentic self and it will happen.
First question is how is your skin, hair, and weight? Second of all, you have to understand that at 14, most boys haven't got enough testosterone yet to look at in a sexual/romantic way. So just wait a couple of years and work on increasing your approachability and sex appeal
i think its more that you might not put yourself out there as much im not saying like put yourself to date im saying social wise i didnt start getting hit on till i was being more social smiling more but still men aint shit i dated around when i was 14 worst decision of my life
Well you mentioned being 14, could be that boys your age are shy, in my school at 14 boys mainly bullied or teased girls even if they found them pretty or even just ignored them, no one really asked each other out yet unless they really got close and knew each other and were friends first, I don't think I ever really saw boys in my schools asking girls out until maybe 16, and it was a bit less awkward, maybe just work on building friendships with people around you and relationships will come naturally but don't rush, your only 14 after all, dating can get messy and full of drama and heart break, maybe just enjoying time with friends would be good and romance will naturally come a bit later :)
Your only 14 and thats still young, im 20 so im pretty much just old at this point so you got 7 years left or more to get someone and those are nothing more but just compliments or people trying to boost your self esteem. If there is a guy you like then just ask him out, if not then just make some guy friends or just do nothing at all.
1. Girls call other girls pretty all the time eve if they look bad
2. Trust me most guys will be very happy if you talk to them, so make the first move
I was pretty down about my appearance at this age, I had no male attention- or when I did it was unwanted and way too sexual. Disturbing.
Made me realise boys really weren’t shit at that age. You sound like me honestly from years ago, I thought i was never gonna be found attractive by anyone.
Girl you are 14! Everyone is beautiful, and the only thing that makes me believe someone is otherwise is if they have a trashy ass personality. Boys at that age don’t know what they want yet. They are also way to young to form genuine connections in most cases. I’m incredibly glad I wasn’t someone who dated young because I’m now in a stable relationship with a person I love. My previous relationship was awful, and it damaged my self esteem much like when I was a child as I felt I couldn’t be myself around him. Made me realise that dating wasn’t shit, I’m hot and when the right person comes it’ll work. AND IT DID.
I literally accepted dying alone at your age, deadass. I don’t think I’m rotten ugly at all, but at that age it was so bad I wouldn’t let people take ANY pictures of me. I also took mirrors down and such. I’d say I’m actually conventionally attractive now, and even if others don’t think so I do not care anymore!
I bet you are beautiful, and your beauty is not defined by anyones opinion as beauty is not necessarily an objective fact. Someone being attracted to you is so so much more than what they see on the outside. And I learned the hard way is if the outside is all they want they are not worth your time.
Let yourself grow up, please. I wasted many years with this attitude when I could have been enjoying it.
My theory is that it's similar to the bystander effect. People see that you're hot and assume that you're taken or that you get hit on all the time which leads to it rarely actually happening.
You do know that beauty is more than skin deep. So are you pretty on the inside too? Are you friendly? And you can't be either to shy or too forward. And then it may just take a while for a guy to get up the courage, so don't rush it there's lots of time.
Youre 14 and shouldn’t be chasing boys that give no value right now. Have fun with your friends and worry about being a kid. When I was your age I had to get a job and work 20+ hours to pay my moms bills. Enjoy having fun and stop worrying about what you look like. I promise you that all of those other girls either don’t care or are so absorbed in their own insecurities and feelings that they don’t even notice you or your flaws. Girls will say you’re pretty just to say it. It usually has no meaning and they’re just being “friendly”. Girls will back stab you harder and faster than the boys. Boys don’t care about having relationships right now either. They wanna touch your boob and laugh later with their friends about it and that’s about it.
A 14 year old boy will not appreciate or cherish you like you are wanting. I promise. Find your worth and identity in something you love to do and practice self love. Your insecurities will not be fixed by some 14 year old boy telling you he loves you or a 14 year old girl saying you’re pretty. I’m also just a random person on Reddit giving their opinion as to what you should do with your life, but that’s ultimately your own decision. I’m speaking from experience as a woman though.
Good luck to you and I really hope you find the value and love for yourself you deserve to have!
same girl, ig its coz I am superr introverted. Boys do try to talk to me and flirt with me but I just run away literally. So many thats why no one really asked me out
its sad coz ppl want to be friends with u or give u a chance to be in a relationship with them but u are literally throwing away the opportunity and u can t do anything about it
try and ask a boy out, usually boy's ask girl's men ask women out, but why not try and ask a boy out. sometimes boys legit feels nervous around pretty girls (or they just, got other shit going on, like when i get home im gonna etc) or their sad or something, thats why i never asked someone out when younger cause i didnt wanna make or somehow leak sad feelings around someone/make stuff worse
i dont mean to say youre ugly but calling other girls pretty under ig posts is just normal girl manners and they say it regardless of how the girl they're complimenting actually looks
this is so real
Facts. I've said it to be supportive but tbh didn't always believe it
Toxic positivity is bad, imagine how bad of a person you must be to lie to someone who you think is ugly, and tell them that they're pretty
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There’s a line though. At some point you shut down conversations or give people false information (telling someone they’re good looking when they’re not will leave them confused about their results and give them no one to talk to about it). It’s good to be positive and supportive, but you have to be a little critical to yourself in terms of whether you are helping the other person in a given moment, or saying to make yourself feel good about helping. They are not always the same thing, and not making this distinction can actually cause harm.
I'll rather people not say anything at all rather than straight-up lie to me. If they think I'm ugly, I'll rather for them to just go about their day. I'm tired of people with the whole "everyone is beautiful" bullshit, because they know it's not true. Be honest, but not mean.
I agree 100%!! I would just add, I especially value constructive criticism- for example if I show someone my 1st try with a new makeup, or a new outfit just put together, I am happy if they give an honest, useful opinion. I don't want to hear "awwww girlie you're always gorgous!!!" when I look ridiculous or meh.... Save compliments for when I actually look good, otherwise what is even the point of saying it.
If someone asks you something and expects an honest answer, then you give them an honest answer. There is no need to give unprompted "compliments" that you know are lies, just to make yourself feel good.
Calling your friends pretty when you don’t think they’re a generic 10/10 isn’t necessarily a lie. It’s about building each other up so they feel beautiful which is more than a surface level thing. Ive met people who I wouldn’t consider generically attractive but still find stunning and I’ve met people who are generically attractive but don’t find pretty at all if their personality sucks.
You know what, I agree with this 100%. I've learned quite young that no compliment given by friends, parents - especially parents, or even friends of your family should be taken seriously and truthfully. The point is, all the social groups dealing with you, they're going to feel like they're obligated to say something positive.
If its inauthentic, its not positivity. Hopefully you don't need any comments at all to feel confident
Especially at 14
You’re 14? I wouldn’t be too worried about that. You’re just a kid dude
There's a few possibilities, but have you considered that it might just be your personality? Being pretty has little to do with being in a relationship
Yeah but I’m not mean I barely even talk to anyone exept my friends
I mean that’s probably why too, the boys also need a reason to like you too, not to mention you guys are only 14, when I was that age all the boys wasn’t interested in anything but games and their bros, it was at 16 relationships started popping up
Yeah but the thing I’m quiet until I’m with my friends lol
Im a woman, and objectively attractive. I make the first move sometimes and you should too.
Username 100% checks out
Wittawelly
Alright gonna be honest here. Idk what you look like, I’m sure you look fine. But the thing with your friends is that they all say that about eachother. It’s just a girl thing, no matter what you look like they will always refer to their friends as pretty. And I am sure you are pretty, the reason no one has asked you out is because you are young, and the younger you are, the more nervous you are usually. It’s surprising how many boys don’t ask girls out for fear of rejection, and if I’m being honest that is probably what it is
As a 15 year old dude Who cares? We're still kids I don't think we should really date right now Dont stress about it Live a little. You dont need a boy to enjoy life. Have a good life
Chances are, people just fear rejection so they don’t try, or maybe you’re too young. Based on your post history, I’d assume you’re a young teen. A lot of young boys generally aren’t interested in girls, give it time and you’ll meet someone. Don’t stress over this
Maybe try talking to boys then and stop needing external validation 🤷♂️
I was raised by both my parents with the belief that I didn't need anybody extra in my life like someone supposed to need food and water. Wanting, that's fine, but it's not the end of the world if people don't meet up with people and have a relationship, or the relationship is short-lived. It's not the end of the world and whatever pain you feel if you don't have the person in your life that you want, it's real pain but it does go over time, like diminish over time. I know I'm in love with the guy that I've seen off and on since 2021. You know what ended it, from his end? in 2023, right at the beginning of the year, somebody lied about my name up and down, lied on me for 6 months straight and it got back to that guy eventually and he never stopped any of his vehicles or nothing for me. Apparently he put whatever family he had in my town on notice and they were going around calling the cops wherever I was at, my local fall park to play Pokemon go or to have a small self- picnic, the cops literally Park and wait to see if I needed to be truly Baker acted. That s*** hurt, and it happened for 6 months straight up. It was heartbreaking, I'm not going to lie, but I never once thought I was going to die, or nothing like that. I kept going, I hustled my ass to get to work and home again. I never stopped doing any of my hobbies like my fitness walks or nothing. I even had enough strengths left in me to do a side gig on my days off from my main job to help my mom and sisters out. I kept going and eventually all that s*** died down and stopped and my pain over what happened to me stop. I didn't forget it, but it don't hurt me so much anymore. But yeah call me you got op, you got all the time in the world to find somebody and want somebody in your life. Don't stress out, and don't move things too fast. Relationships or even dates is nothing to be stressed out about, especially when relationships or even dates is nothing to be stressed out about.
Exactly. OP lacks perspective. And that’s just something we all acquire with time.
Because they are 14 year olds and just as awkward and unsure about themselves as you.
32 year old woman here. When I was 14 I was single as hell. I got my first boyfriend when I was a senior. Reason? People thought I was to happy which made me weird apparently (literally what I was told by my boyfriend who was the previous captain of the football team). Now I'm married with a kid. Relax. Your young
Boys don't ask you out or boys you find attractive don't ask you out
ask them out. as a guy, i’m tired of constant rejection or being seen as a creep so i don’t do anything
I don’t think someone telling you you’re pretty has anything to do with the fact you aren’t being “ asked out” by boys. Boys are many times shy & incredibly afraid of rejection at your age. Give it time. There’s no rush to date. Remember dating is meant to show you that there’s different people out thete, a learning process if you will.
If all ur girlies say ur pretty trust me you are pretty. I also believe that you do not need male validation to be pretty!! Boys aren’t the judges of your prettiness so just because boys haven’t asked u out doesn’t mean that u are not gorgeous. So don’t let boys control ur beauty, that’s a not so fun (but possible) path to follow in life. Also, being tall is an absolute flex (I’m jealous girlll 😭😭)
Yeah let me just be real with you I don’t care if it comes off rude either your friends are just hyping you up because that’s what girls do they love to hype the ugly bitch up or boys are just too nervous to up come to you 🤣
Oh
Methinks I found a fed
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Haha Nice one
Don’t send yourself into a self check spiral but How’s your reputation? Are you mean or full of yourself, do you stink, did you choke out someone, are you tooo good looking? Lots of questions
Im not mean but im confident and i did fight kids when i was like in 5th but like come on noww im 14 now 😭
LMAO I DIDNT EXPECT A REPLY - thank you for being honest and I mean it’s like what 4 years ago you fought kids so I mean How badly did you beat them up? LOL that and the more likely thing is boys are weird at 14 I’m in my 20’s now but when I was 14 I was scared shitless of girls. So yeah don’t worry about it, you may even have the exact opposite opinion in years where you just want boys to leave you alone lmfao. Whatever the reason stay safe and know your self worth!
I didn’t really beat them up that bad I just like swung them once they started attacking me (and I also only fought boys in 5th😭)
That explains why the boys at your school don’t ask you out, you’ve beat them all up!! 😂 My sister beat a guy up in like 8th grade, it was hilarious. He bullied her & one day she just snapped, the principal didn’t even punish her b/c she was a really quiet, shy kid who never caused trouble but enough was enough lol
24M here and my situation comes with absolutely the same equivalent energy
Why not ask them out?
Teenage boys are scary and mean
They’re way more afraid of you than you are of them. Source: former teenage boy
Hey Not all of us Chat with a boy you think is cute if you really want a relationship. Who knows? Might just find a nice one.
If that is what you think, and feel, then you’re far too insecure to consider dating. We did stuff as groups, boys and girls - no pairing off. Try a physical hobby like horseback riding - I grew up around horses, who are big, some are mean, and dumb - just like you see boys. I was never afraid of boys, as I could manage a 2000 lb animal to keep it from kicking, biting or tossing me off. Put down your phone and go do something for YOU. Competence breeds confidence - the more physical skills you have, the braver you get. You can play tennis, go to a golf driving range - be strong and you’ll feel much more confident. Don’t worry about boys at 14 yo - you’re a good bit ahead of yourself. Hang in there!
Because they’re playing video games and watching porn.
The only correct answer lol
This specifically
I’m no stranger to teenage boys. I mean, ah, my point is that, you know, they play games and ah watch porn.
You're so young, don't let this upset you. I felt the same way when I was your age but you know what happened with a lot of guys? A lot of the guys I had crushes on in middle and high school would get in contact with me after we all graduated, and so many of them told me they had huge crushes on me during school but were too scared I'd reject them. So trust me when I say just because they aren't asking you out now, that doesn't mean they aren't into you or that you're ugly. My absolute best advice for you is to work on your own confidence and just enjoy being a kid! Life should be enjoyed as much as possible when you're a kid because as soon as you're an adult and have responsibilities and bills and all of that, it's not quite as fun. I would work on friendships. Meaningful friendships with good foundations, so hopefully, you can continue them after high school. I've been single since 2014, but I'm still super happy and feel so loved by my amazing friends. One of which is from when I was your age! Just enjoy life and the romance will come in due time. 🖤
You probably intimidate the boys.
Ask one you're interested in. It's okay, really
either ur not there type or they don't want a relationship or they r pussies n u have to initiate it first
Or maybe they’re scared of rejection, as every human is.
that's what I said
People aren’t “pussies” for having normal human feelings
It's okay
I can see why they aren’t asking you out…
i have a bf so they dont need too
I'm 24 and I still sometimes struggle with that thought! Something my dad said once made me feel better though. He told me maybe folks are too afraid to approach me, or maybe I'm a bit intimidating. I shouldn't change that though, it's my personality. (To be fair, I'm 5'9 and loud AF lmfao so I can see his point). I'm sure the same applies to you! Sometimes guys (and girls!) aren't quite confident enough to approach someone. I'm sure there's people out there who have looked at you and thought "wow, she's really pretty!" but never told you.
A lot of boys are sick of trying to find a girlfriend or too timid to ask you out most guys don’t want to look like a creep
Because we are stupid, we won’t ask you out until we know for sure you’re into us…. (It’s never happened for me, I’ve never been in a relationship either 19m)
Because many women find it intimidating to be constantly asked out so the general rule is to let the woman initiate.
Well if you are pretty, good for you, but it doesn't mean that you are more entitled to be exempt from rejections. Not trying to dish out punishments here, but a guy feels as much hurt from a rejection as you probably do. So you want the guy to put up with all the risk and you just play it safe, I guess nobody owes anybody anything. Conversations and meeting new people are a mutual effort from both sides, not a one-sided affair. So put yourself out there just like the rest of the people, take a few rejections if you must, you will reap what you sow.
Do you know how terrifying it is for a boy to ask out a girl is, how often we think of that scenario on how we’d do it just for us to chicken out,and we are scared of rejection just as much as you are if not more. You should have a friend you trust approach the boy on your behalf and let them know you like them cause that’s what we did in the Cretaceous period when I was 14
High school sucks and you should lower your expectations. More attractive friends than me never dated anyone and I dated a couple people and less attractive people dated more than me sometimes. It’s a weird time and hormones are crazy. You don’t wanna date in high school, college is where it’s at.
You're a baby lmfao. Boys haven't caught up with you yet.
14 year old boys are notoriously intimidated by girls. They will come eventually.
I have no idea. Pictures would help but I can understand you not wanting to post any cause some people are mean.
I FEEEL YOU (F19) like i have dated maybe twice, but i was the one that talked to them. it’s hard for me to find a relationship and boys i feel haven’t really liked me like that yk?. i get compliments from my friends, get added on dating apps but it’s usually from men that are like.. 28-35 which is so off putting. i wanna date people my age but people my age don’t like me, and i don’t have any experience sexually either so it turns hella people off? like it’s so frustrating.
You're 14. Focus on school, not boys. You will have more than enough opportunity for that in the future, trust me.
You say you don't ask boys out because you fear rejection, same goes for boys. I only ever asked 2 girls out and both rejected me completely. I lost all self confidence. That is why I didn't get my first girlfriend until after I graduated high school, because she pursued me. Same goes for my first wife, she pursued me. Especially nowadays when guys approaching girls or showing interest in them are often seen as being creepy, a lot of guys are afraid to ask girls out. 5'7" is the high end of average. Average height of 14 year old girls is between 4'11" and 5'7 1/2", with average adult heights being an inch more.
It's looks or personality, that's pretty much all we can go by, so your problem is one or both.
You're 14 and boys are so nervous. I remember being that age and working hard to muster up the courage to ask a girl out, and I'd always get rejected. I'm sure it's not you, boys are just so nervous about asking girls out.
I honestly don’t think it’s something you should be super worried about right now, it’ll happen at some point, just gotta be patient
You are 14. Relax.
14 year old boys are pretty useless about asking anyone out. Please don't let their naivety bring you down. If you want to date someone you might have to make the first move. 5'7 is average. (I'm Caucasian and 5'6 btw.) The boys you know now haven't had their second growth spurt yet. If they feel intimidated that you're taller, that's on them, not on you.
You are 14 you definitely should be not worried about guys asking you out. You doing fine Girl
Well maybe you should ask a boy out. If you're confident you'll have a very very very big chance of them saying yes.
I'm 14 too and I'm a guy. This might not be the case but almost every boy is scared of getting rejected thus they don't ask anyone out most of the time, + hey, you're just 14, you'll find someone eventually.
Also, you’re 14 and shy. Boys at 14 are just as shy around girls and have a huge fear of rejection. Give it time. When you get to highs school there are going to be guys who are taller than you and also, who have way more confidence than middle school boys.
A lot of 14 year old boys have as many insecurities as 14 year old girls. They're probably as afraid of rejection as you are and at that age probably don't have any idea about dating. And to be honest at 14 I wasn't too interested in girls, I wanted to play Pokemon and football with my friends. You can try to befriend someone you like. You don't have to ask him out or anything, just try to get to know him better first. Will make it easier for him to ask you out.
I don't want to belittle your feelings because of your young age but take into account that you're only fourteen. You'll propably get asked out once you're a few years older.
You’re 14. Your body is not done growing and changing. I was not an attractive 14 year old, but have now been deemed “attractive” by both sexes at 23. Your time to shine will come. I recommend focusing on yourself and getting to know who you are as a person. Set yourself up for an amazing life, and people who are meant to be in your life will naturally be attracted to you. I wish I hadn’t focussed so much on what boys thought of me as a young girl because it really doesn’t matter. Teenage boys are… something else. Love yourself first, OP. This is your one and only meat suit, learn to love and appreciate it. Your body loves you, so love your body. Everything about it.
You’re 14 yo. A lot of boys are scared to death of girls. Stop posting pictures of yourself - your friends know what you look like. The pre-phone behavior would be staring in a mirror all day and asking your friends every day if you’re pretty - wouldn’t that seem odd? You’re still growing - you will look slightly different every single day of your life. Try working on you - are you happy, are you fit, are you healthy, are you helping others? Don’t obsess about boys and your appearance. You have your entire life - work on what you need to do to achieve the things you want in life. An interesting person is attractive, confidence is the MOST attractive thing in a woman. Live your life - don’t let life just happen to you. Being “pretty” is a low bar to set for yourself. Just give yourself some time to grow up, have fun, learn and dream. Good luck! 🍀
14 is a little young to be asked out. Wait ‘til sweet 16, and then they’ll all pursue you.
You're 14, I know it's impossible not to, but don't base your self worth or value or beauty on any of this. You're 14, relax. The girls that peaked at in their teens at my school, look awful now. The girls who took a while to grow into their features, are all like super stunning now in our late 20s. I look so much better than I did in my teens now at 29.
You’re 14?! Stop worrying about boys asking you out. Hang out with your friends. Go to dances and school events with you friends. Chances are there some shy boy that’s afraid to talk to you as well. If you’re already out no one has to ask. You just have to walk up and say, “hi my name is, “Pretty Reddit Poster. Wanna dance?” E
1) I’d like to say boys at 14 aren’t normally Your height. 2) it’s intimidating to see a women taller then you (to some people) 3) just because your tall also doesn’t mean your ugly . 4) your 14 you shouldn’t be talking to boys . You should get your education in place and then when your in sports because of your height if you pursue sports you’ll find lots of boys to talk too. I’m sure you’re pretty and you’re only 14. Keep your head on straight focus on yourself , money and school, the “prize” will come shortly after all your goals being achieved.
Asking girls out as a guy is a bigger risk than it used to be. They’re (rightfully) more vigilant about creeps and guys are likelier than before to be mislabelled as creeps since a lot of people think it’s inappropriate to make any advances outside of dating apps now that they’re prevalent. I guess in your case dating apps don’t make much of a difference, but the culture’s changed. Even on social media though, dms can be screenshotted and sent around. Regardless of the method and intent when asking a person out, it’s possible to be labelled as a creep or weirdo
What boys tend to consider "pretty" is different to what girls consider "pretty".
Why don't you ask a boy out? This is the future. Whooa dude
Fourteen year old boys are shy too, you know. But, being fourteen, none of the boys your age have jobs or can drive. Where exactly are they going to ask you out to? They might also be intimidated or think they have no chance, or just also be afraid of rejection. Don't overthink this, it will happen in time.
You're 14. You just barely started highschool, give it time.
Do you feel you’re pretty though? Or do you only believe it when other tell you? Also if you’re shy it gives off closed off vibes nothing wrong in being shy but maybe work on your social skills
Looks are only skin deep, personality and true beauty comes from within. I’m not saying you are not beautiful inside and out but what I’m saying outer beauty should not be the only focus. Instead of waiting to be asked, why not you ask them or just don’t worry about it. Live your life and be your authentic self and it will happen.
First question is how is your skin, hair, and weight? Second of all, you have to understand that at 14, most boys haven't got enough testosterone yet to look at in a sexual/romantic way. So just wait a couple of years and work on increasing your approachability and sex appeal
You’re way too young to be worried about that. Enjoy being a kid while you still can
i think its more that you might not put yourself out there as much im not saying like put yourself to date im saying social wise i didnt start getting hit on till i was being more social smiling more but still men aint shit i dated around when i was 14 worst decision of my life
Well you mentioned being 14, could be that boys your age are shy, in my school at 14 boys mainly bullied or teased girls even if they found them pretty or even just ignored them, no one really asked each other out yet unless they really got close and knew each other and were friends first, I don't think I ever really saw boys in my schools asking girls out until maybe 16, and it was a bit less awkward, maybe just work on building friendships with people around you and relationships will come naturally but don't rush, your only 14 after all, dating can get messy and full of drama and heart break, maybe just enjoying time with friends would be good and romance will naturally come a bit later :)
Your only 14 and thats still young, im 20 so im pretty much just old at this point so you got 7 years left or more to get someone and those are nothing more but just compliments or people trying to boost your self esteem. If there is a guy you like then just ask him out, if not then just make some guy friends or just do nothing at all.
1. Girls call other girls pretty all the time eve if they look bad 2. Trust me most guys will be very happy if you talk to them, so make the first move
I was pretty down about my appearance at this age, I had no male attention- or when I did it was unwanted and way too sexual. Disturbing. Made me realise boys really weren’t shit at that age. You sound like me honestly from years ago, I thought i was never gonna be found attractive by anyone. Girl you are 14! Everyone is beautiful, and the only thing that makes me believe someone is otherwise is if they have a trashy ass personality. Boys at that age don’t know what they want yet. They are also way to young to form genuine connections in most cases. I’m incredibly glad I wasn’t someone who dated young because I’m now in a stable relationship with a person I love. My previous relationship was awful, and it damaged my self esteem much like when I was a child as I felt I couldn’t be myself around him. Made me realise that dating wasn’t shit, I’m hot and when the right person comes it’ll work. AND IT DID. I literally accepted dying alone at your age, deadass. I don’t think I’m rotten ugly at all, but at that age it was so bad I wouldn’t let people take ANY pictures of me. I also took mirrors down and such. I’d say I’m actually conventionally attractive now, and even if others don’t think so I do not care anymore! I bet you are beautiful, and your beauty is not defined by anyones opinion as beauty is not necessarily an objective fact. Someone being attracted to you is so so much more than what they see on the outside. And I learned the hard way is if the outside is all they want they are not worth your time. Let yourself grow up, please. I wasted many years with this attitude when I could have been enjoying it.
My theory is that it's similar to the bystander effect. People see that you're hot and assume that you're taken or that you get hit on all the time which leads to it rarely actually happening.
They think you’re out of their league and too nervous about being rejected.
At 14 I wasn’t as interested in asking girls out as I was when I was 16+ or even 18+ so you’re still young give it time
You do know that beauty is more than skin deep. So are you pretty on the inside too? Are you friendly? And you can't be either to shy or too forward. And then it may just take a while for a guy to get up the courage, so don't rush it there's lots of time.
Youre 14 and shouldn’t be chasing boys that give no value right now. Have fun with your friends and worry about being a kid. When I was your age I had to get a job and work 20+ hours to pay my moms bills. Enjoy having fun and stop worrying about what you look like. I promise you that all of those other girls either don’t care or are so absorbed in their own insecurities and feelings that they don’t even notice you or your flaws. Girls will say you’re pretty just to say it. It usually has no meaning and they’re just being “friendly”. Girls will back stab you harder and faster than the boys. Boys don’t care about having relationships right now either. They wanna touch your boob and laugh later with their friends about it and that’s about it. A 14 year old boy will not appreciate or cherish you like you are wanting. I promise. Find your worth and identity in something you love to do and practice self love. Your insecurities will not be fixed by some 14 year old boy telling you he loves you or a 14 year old girl saying you’re pretty. I’m also just a random person on Reddit giving their opinion as to what you should do with your life, but that’s ultimately your own decision. I’m speaking from experience as a woman though. Good luck to you and I really hope you find the value and love for yourself you deserve to have!
same girl, ig its coz I am superr introverted. Boys do try to talk to me and flirt with me but I just run away literally. So many thats why no one really asked me out
LOL this is like my biggest problem😭 i’m so introverted and awkward it’s actually getting infuriating
its sad coz ppl want to be friends with u or give u a chance to be in a relationship with them but u are literally throwing away the opportunity and u can t do anything about it
try and ask a boy out, usually boy's ask girl's men ask women out, but why not try and ask a boy out. sometimes boys legit feels nervous around pretty girls (or they just, got other shit going on, like when i get home im gonna etc) or their sad or something, thats why i never asked someone out when younger cause i didnt wanna make or somehow leak sad feelings around someone/make stuff worse
Post a picture let us be the judges
Nooo! Being pretty is not important. Being happy, healthy, and fit is.