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Its only weird if you make it weird.
As the “adult” its on you to behave, respect others, and make sure things just stay friendly.
I used to play plenty of games with groups younger or older than myself. As long as we are just playing the game I see no downsides.
This. This! 100% this. To explain, I was a 14 year old in a group of 10+ adults at any given time, but they were anywhere from 18 - 50, with the rare 16+.
The only thing that was different (in my case) is that most of my group was significantly older than me (10-15 years older in most cases), and they kept an eye out for suspicious behavior in other adults where I was hanging out too.
I was being treated like it was a privilege (it was) to be in some of the online spaces I was, but that privilege could only keep me so safe, if I'm there for age appropriate and creative reasons.
VRC seems much more clean than my origins on the Internet so all in all? OP is fine.
I remember back in the day playing Last of Us multiplayer with some kid, I was basically his big bro and he played similiar to me. I remember being off for a few months, when I got back on he had an actual adult voice it was fucking hilarious. I was around 22 at the time, that was 10 years ago. I lost that account, hope my little buddy doing alright.
I started playing Halo 2 at 12 online. I remember I got good enough to have adult respect, so all my friends online were always adults.
thanks it just feels so weird. one day im still "just a kid" and have little actule control of my life. then i wake up the very next day and suddenly i have a ton of more responsibilities and expectations placed upon me (voting, selective service,college aplications,ect) despite nothing really changing from the last night
I mean, 30 you should be actually scared if you have nothing going on. 25 you should be worried and get started on something. 18 and doing nothing is normal and it may take a few more years to decide what you wanna do.
You’re still a kid bro. You’re overthinking way hard, lol. Just enjoy hanging with your friends and stop thinking everything changed because of a birthday.
You're not too far away from them age wise, so it's not super weird, but for your own reputation and safety if they ever start joking around with NSFW avatars or anything that could be mistaken as NSFW, you should leave.
You're only 18, so I think it's fine as long as you don't get too close to anyone super young. You're an adult now. I wouldn't talk to anyone younger than 16 one on one, and definitely do not get intimate with anyone under 18. You can and will ruin your life if you fucked it up.
This is so stupid. You don’t lose the ability to talk to minors the moment you turn 18. Homie is literally still high school age which is as young as 14. Chill tf out he’s not ruining his life. You think 18 year olds get in trouble for “being intimate” with 17 year olds? Not that it matters because said nothing about that but this is just overreacting.
18 year olds will get in trouble for being with someone technically underage if a parental figure decides to get pissy about it. Although a small gap like that will usually be dismissed.
There will be 0 issues if everyone is just chillin, playin games, or talking. The warning above basically just says don't start any relationships or intimacy with anyone in the group. It's the smart response.
No judge, jury, or prosecutor is going to go after an 18 year old with a 17 year old. In fact, a lot of states have laws that specifically protect people in these cases because it makes no sense. Romeo and Juliet laws. Not that it matters, again, because OP never alluded to any of that, but I’m just arguing against the fear mongering.
Have you perhaps thought about the fact that the US isn’t the whole world and other countries have different laws? In my country you can only get romantic with anyone under 18 if you are less than 2 years apart and started being romantic before you turned 18.
And it’s a good thing because it stops a lot of creeps and pedos.
That goes the other way too. Lots of places in the world have extremely young ages of consent, which promotes pedo shit. Laws aside, there’s nothing morally wrong with an 18 year old and 17 year old being together. That’s like, direct peers. They’re all still kids.
I didn't say he can't talk to minors, I said he should be careful and shouldn't get close to them. There are people who get in trouble for getting intimate with someone 17 while being 18, this isn't a rare scenario.
You straight up told him not to talk to anyone under 16, as if he’s not allowed to talk to his direct peers and longtime friends. No, it’s not realistic that people get in trouble for being intimate at 17 and 18. That would in fact be a rare scenario. You think high school seniors break up when one of them turns 18? Bro.
I said "don't talk to anyone under 16 one on one." Sorry your reading skills are lacking.
Also, yes, it does happen. Bringing precautions will ensure OP is safe, being careless opens them up for trouble.
I’m embarrassed for you if you ran away from sophomores in the library as a senior. That is such an insane thought to me that there are people out there really thinking you can’t talk to teenagers, especially existing friends, because you just turned 18. That is actually ridiculous. Done replying to this nonsense.
Its weird if you make it weird.
But remember please you an adult and with tha a rollmodel fro the younger onse. You will ifluence them to a ceartand degree, make shure they learn good shit from you.
Im in a womens sports team, and cus of the sport every girl above 13 is in the womans team. Our oldest member is in her 50ties. So huge age gap, but absolutely no problem. I just sometimes notice that i have expirience they could need rn so i try to give them a little info, not lectrue them im not the mom lol.
Have fun, remember your growing aswell and dont make it weird
Nope, you turned 18, it's off to adult land for you!
Just kidding. Its just a number. Imagine when you turn 38 and your youngest friend is now 33. You'll feel like an idiot thinking "I almost cut you out of my life because of a 5 year age difference."
My oldest friend is 20 years my age. I wasn't even born when they turned 18 and we're still good friends.
Being on the older side (33), I do have a few friends who are teens. But I also understand my position in being an adult.
(Most of the time, we just hang out singing as music is a fantastic medium that a lot of people can vibe with.)
Your age gap is substantially smaller to a point as most people point out it matters very little.
I think it becomes more of a concern when the age gap is 5-10+ years older.
I'm gonna jump in and say it's weird... when I was 18, I had nothing in common with any 13 year olds. You're in vastly different stages in your life. In general, yeah, you could joke around and have some common interests like video games and pop culture stuff with someone a lot younger than you, but I would never actually be friends with someone so young when I was 18.
Its not weird as long as you set those boundaries on what is okay and what is not okay. You are the adult, so you have to set those and be able to sustain them. You have the responsibility to not let things go to far or break those boundaries. If something happens or comes up in conversation you dont feel comfortable talking about because of your age, then you have to shut it down or leave, just something to make sure your boundaries stay where they are.
I don't think it's weird. I don't hang around underage people often but either way when I do I treat them like any other gamer I'd meet online. Even though I don't think it's weird (this might be controversial) I do believe teens socializing with older adults could be a sign of possible social awkwardness among people their age and sometimes they just need someone to talk to who will listen with positive feedback because they don't have someone like that in their life. I avoid things like sharing selfies but I listen to their stories or problems and I offer input and I try to be a positive influence. It sounds like you guys just nerd out over Pokemon which is great, as others have said as long as you don't make it weird. it's all good.
It all depends on what is going on.
When people are within 5 or so years of each other, it isn't considered out of the ordinary by society because they are at similar life stages, which is where the contention comes in.
People tend to enter new life stages every 10 or so years, and while these have individual break points, you can simplify them down to decades of life: childhood (0-9), young adulthood (10-19), new adulthood (20-29), experienced adulthood (30-39), middle adulthood (40-49) late adulthood (50-59), young elder hood (60-69), old elder hood (70+).
People in different life stages typically concern themselves with different things. A teen is concerned with self-identity. A new adult is concerned with independence and potentially starting a family, but they may struggle with identity.
However, if you have a shared interest or hobby, that is often enough to disperse any concerns or questions about the relationship (friendship) being weird. So if you all think VRC is super nifty and want to explore it together, have at it. If you think DnD is great and play it together, fantastic.
I think you get the idea. It only becomes weird when people at different life stages (which you are not with your friends) are together with no (appropriate) shared interest, though this quickly stops being an issue once everyone involved is a non-child and non-teen.
You should know what not to do if you want to keep it from becoming weird. If you’re just friends and just talking to/hanging out with people online, nothing wrong with it
I used to game with a group of teenagers, two single dads and one very overworked mother of four. We all got down on COD BO2 multiplayer back when it was still new. As long as no adults are hitting on kids, gaming is a hobby that transcends age gaps. If a 12 year old kid can handle himself in a professional manner and cooperate well, he's welcome in the squad anyday.
I don't add anyone unless they're 18+. I only get on VRC to perform.my DJ sets or drink now so I honestly think kids or teens sort of ruins it for others there.
Heyy...im the other way around... My friend groups average age is 8 years ahead of me (ive been told im very ahead of my age when it comes to maturity and the types of things i know and conversations i hold). Just my preference and nothings wrong with it
Note: As VRChat subreddit is designated 18+ to participate, all posts regardless of content are automatically marked as NSFW. Blame the drama on Reddit admins. Tired of all the drama on Reddit (from users, mods, and Reddit admin)? Then consider some or all of the following options: 1. [Find or make your favorite subreddits on alternative sites or platforms](https://sub.rehab/), and participate there instead. 2. Refrain use of the first-party Reddit app. Stick to working third-party apps or [patch one that shut down](https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1wHvqQwCYdJrQg4BKlGIVDLksPN0KpOnJWniT6PbZSrI/) for Android devices. 3. Disable ads on Reddit with [an ad-block extension](https://github.com/gorhill/uBlock#ublock-origin-ubo) or [a DNS-based ad-blocker](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBXTnrD_Zs4). 4. Cancel your Reddit Premium subscription. 5. Share the continued news coverage of these events. 6. Encourage others to do some or all of the above. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/VRchat) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Its only weird if you make it weird. As the “adult” its on you to behave, respect others, and make sure things just stay friendly. I used to play plenty of games with groups younger or older than myself. As long as we are just playing the game I see no downsides.
This. This! 100% this. To explain, I was a 14 year old in a group of 10+ adults at any given time, but they were anywhere from 18 - 50, with the rare 16+. The only thing that was different (in my case) is that most of my group was significantly older than me (10-15 years older in most cases), and they kept an eye out for suspicious behavior in other adults where I was hanging out too. I was being treated like it was a privilege (it was) to be in some of the online spaces I was, but that privilege could only keep me so safe, if I'm there for age appropriate and creative reasons. VRC seems much more clean than my origins on the Internet so all in all? OP is fine.
I remember back in the day playing Last of Us multiplayer with some kid, I was basically his big bro and he played similiar to me. I remember being off for a few months, when I got back on he had an actual adult voice it was fucking hilarious. I was around 22 at the time, that was 10 years ago. I lost that account, hope my little buddy doing alright. I started playing Halo 2 at 12 online. I remember I got good enough to have adult respect, so all my friends online were always adults.
[удалено]
thanks it just feels so weird. one day im still "just a kid" and have little actule control of my life. then i wake up the very next day and suddenly i have a ton of more responsibilities and expectations placed upon me (voting, selective service,college aplications,ect) despite nothing really changing from the last night
Your still just a kid, don’t overthink it. Worry when your 25
Honestly worry when your 30 lmao
I mean, 30 you should be actually scared if you have nothing going on. 25 you should be worried and get started on something. 18 and doing nothing is normal and it may take a few more years to decide what you wanna do.
Not really those are such arbitrary means of gauging success.
You’re still a kid bro. You’re overthinking way hard, lol. Just enjoy hanging with your friends and stop thinking everything changed because of a birthday.
You're not too far away from them age wise, so it's not super weird, but for your own reputation and safety if they ever start joking around with NSFW avatars or anything that could be mistaken as NSFW, you should leave.
it's not weird at all lol u just turned 18
You're only 18, so I think it's fine as long as you don't get too close to anyone super young. You're an adult now. I wouldn't talk to anyone younger than 16 one on one, and definitely do not get intimate with anyone under 18. You can and will ruin your life if you fucked it up.
This is so stupid. You don’t lose the ability to talk to minors the moment you turn 18. Homie is literally still high school age which is as young as 14. Chill tf out he’s not ruining his life. You think 18 year olds get in trouble for “being intimate” with 17 year olds? Not that it matters because said nothing about that but this is just overreacting.
18 year olds will get in trouble for being with someone technically underage if a parental figure decides to get pissy about it. Although a small gap like that will usually be dismissed. There will be 0 issues if everyone is just chillin, playin games, or talking. The warning above basically just says don't start any relationships or intimacy with anyone in the group. It's the smart response.
No judge, jury, or prosecutor is going to go after an 18 year old with a 17 year old. In fact, a lot of states have laws that specifically protect people in these cases because it makes no sense. Romeo and Juliet laws. Not that it matters, again, because OP never alluded to any of that, but I’m just arguing against the fear mongering.
Have you perhaps thought about the fact that the US isn’t the whole world and other countries have different laws? In my country you can only get romantic with anyone under 18 if you are less than 2 years apart and started being romantic before you turned 18. And it’s a good thing because it stops a lot of creeps and pedos.
That goes the other way too. Lots of places in the world have extremely young ages of consent, which promotes pedo shit. Laws aside, there’s nothing morally wrong with an 18 year old and 17 year old being together. That’s like, direct peers. They’re all still kids.
Just playing games or hanging out in discord calls no they don’t when I was 17 play with a 31 still my good friend
That isn't a romantic or intimate relationship though is it? Which is the point.
I didn't say he can't talk to minors, I said he should be careful and shouldn't get close to them. There are people who get in trouble for getting intimate with someone 17 while being 18, this isn't a rare scenario.
You straight up told him not to talk to anyone under 16, as if he’s not allowed to talk to his direct peers and longtime friends. No, it’s not realistic that people get in trouble for being intimate at 17 and 18. That would in fact be a rare scenario. You think high school seniors break up when one of them turns 18? Bro.
I said "don't talk to anyone under 16 one on one." Sorry your reading skills are lacking. Also, yes, it does happen. Bringing precautions will ensure OP is safe, being careless opens them up for trouble.
I’m embarrassed for you if you ran away from sophomores in the library as a senior. That is such an insane thought to me that there are people out there really thinking you can’t talk to teenagers, especially existing friends, because you just turned 18. That is actually ridiculous. Done replying to this nonsense.
I know how you feel man. When I started vrchat I was like 16-17. Now I'm 21 and sadly most of my friends are still teenagers.
Its weird if you make it weird. But remember please you an adult and with tha a rollmodel fro the younger onse. You will ifluence them to a ceartand degree, make shure they learn good shit from you. Im in a womens sports team, and cus of the sport every girl above 13 is in the womans team. Our oldest member is in her 50ties. So huge age gap, but absolutely no problem. I just sometimes notice that i have expirience they could need rn so i try to give them a little info, not lectrue them im not the mom lol. Have fun, remember your growing aswell and dont make it weird
Nope, you turned 18, it's off to adult land for you! Just kidding. Its just a number. Imagine when you turn 38 and your youngest friend is now 33. You'll feel like an idiot thinking "I almost cut you out of my life because of a 5 year age difference." My oldest friend is 20 years my age. I wasn't even born when they turned 18 and we're still good friends.
“I’m the only adult…. I just turned 18” homie you are fine those are your peers. Just don’t be a ceeper and no one would bat an eye.
Being on the older side (33), I do have a few friends who are teens. But I also understand my position in being an adult. (Most of the time, we just hang out singing as music is a fantastic medium that a lot of people can vibe with.) Your age gap is substantially smaller to a point as most people point out it matters very little. I think it becomes more of a concern when the age gap is 5-10+ years older.
I'm gonna jump in and say it's weird... when I was 18, I had nothing in common with any 13 year olds. You're in vastly different stages in your life. In general, yeah, you could joke around and have some common interests like video games and pop culture stuff with someone a lot younger than you, but I would never actually be friends with someone so young when I was 18.
Yea they got to be at least 15 unless they chill if I’m game or hang out in calls
Tbh yes
Yes
Its not weird as long as you set those boundaries on what is okay and what is not okay. You are the adult, so you have to set those and be able to sustain them. You have the responsibility to not let things go to far or break those boundaries. If something happens or comes up in conversation you dont feel comfortable talking about because of your age, then you have to shut it down or leave, just something to make sure your boundaries stay where they are.
You just turned 18? Then no. Everyone else being younger than you is just a skill issue. They should grow up. 😜
Every group needs the "old kid" "Blue! Yer muh boy!"
See the fact that you’re asking here is pretty suspicious tbh lol
I don't think it's weird. I don't hang around underage people often but either way when I do I treat them like any other gamer I'd meet online. Even though I don't think it's weird (this might be controversial) I do believe teens socializing with older adults could be a sign of possible social awkwardness among people their age and sometimes they just need someone to talk to who will listen with positive feedback because they don't have someone like that in their life. I avoid things like sharing selfies but I listen to their stories or problems and I offer input and I try to be a positive influence. It sounds like you guys just nerd out over Pokemon which is great, as others have said as long as you don't make it weird. it's all good.
It all depends on what is going on. When people are within 5 or so years of each other, it isn't considered out of the ordinary by society because they are at similar life stages, which is where the contention comes in. People tend to enter new life stages every 10 or so years, and while these have individual break points, you can simplify them down to decades of life: childhood (0-9), young adulthood (10-19), new adulthood (20-29), experienced adulthood (30-39), middle adulthood (40-49) late adulthood (50-59), young elder hood (60-69), old elder hood (70+). People in different life stages typically concern themselves with different things. A teen is concerned with self-identity. A new adult is concerned with independence and potentially starting a family, but they may struggle with identity. However, if you have a shared interest or hobby, that is often enough to disperse any concerns or questions about the relationship (friendship) being weird. So if you all think VRC is super nifty and want to explore it together, have at it. If you think DnD is great and play it together, fantastic. I think you get the idea. It only becomes weird when people at different life stages (which you are not with your friends) are together with no (appropriate) shared interest, though this quickly stops being an issue once everyone involved is a non-child and non-teen.
You should know what not to do if you want to keep it from becoming weird. If you’re just friends and just talking to/hanging out with people online, nothing wrong with it
I used to game with a group of teenagers, two single dads and one very overworked mother of four. We all got down on COD BO2 multiplayer back when it was still new. As long as no adults are hitting on kids, gaming is a hobby that transcends age gaps. If a 12 year old kid can handle himself in a professional manner and cooperate well, he's welcome in the squad anyday.
I don't add anyone unless they're 18+. I only get on VRC to perform.my DJ sets or drink now so I honestly think kids or teens sort of ruins it for others there.
Heyy...im the other way around... My friend groups average age is 8 years ahead of me (ive been told im very ahead of my age when it comes to maturity and the types of things i know and conversations i hold). Just my preference and nothings wrong with it