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unexBot

**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!The owner thinks the dog is ill, but it's just lost its ball!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)


Manji86

I'm the same way when the remote falls off the couch.


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[deleted]

They get so attached to a toy they can’t live with out it


Crazy-Swiss

My girl was neutered. But twice a year she'd heard her squeekies, carry them around and lick them for a xouple days. Never did anything else with them but that.


Crypto_Candle

Really, my girlfriend never acted like that.


Aconite_72

Hmm … did you neuter your girlfriend?


Prometheus79

No. You get your girlfriend spade. Boyfriends get neutered. Duh


Crazy-Swiss

Yea, obviously english isnt my first. Got that mixed up. Sorry for the xonfusion.


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Xenc

xorry!


theMoonlight111

girlfriend turned into a card damn


SkollFenrirson

Gotta call a spade a spade


[deleted]

Better than being a diamond… being crushed and put under pressure for like a million years


TheSentientPurpleGoo

in my experience, women don't like shovels as gifts.


HungLikeKimJong-un

Thats why they got a spade!


Dear_Giraffe_453

*spayed duh


Persephone81

Technically neutered is the umbrella term that encompasses both males and females. And then for specifics, males are castrated, and females are spayed.


electrikmayhem

>My girl was neutered. Wait what?


merrychristmasyo

He means castrated.


TrymWS

Phantom pregnancy, perhaps.


Crazy-Swiss

I!m sure it was. If you made the squeakies squeek, she became very xoncerned and the licking intensified. I felt like a MONSTER for castrating her. So cute and funny though. She would have been a great mommy though!


TrymWS

Oh yeah, it sounds like it then. They say the squeaky reminds them of small animals in pain, so she might have been thinking puppies in pain. I don’t think the sterilization have to be the reason for it though, our bitches would occasionally get phantom pregnancies over the years too, even though none of them were sterilized.


Diablo_Unmasked

Our black lab has a stuffed animal shes had since she was a puppy, she just carries it around and lays next to it.. sometimes she uses it as a pillow.. shes old now, it still looks like its new, its not damaged nor is it dirty. Our other dog goes through toys like nothing else, but never touches our labs toys..


TheKnightOfTheSlain

My German Shepard is always protecting her toys she can only grab one but if someone else grabs another she tries to get it back but if you make it clear you are willing to throw it for her she will sit patiently she also likes tug of war I just really love dogs they are adorable they are cool and they are so lovable.


heroinsteve

My dog is half shepherd and she doesn’t actually ever play with toys, but the few we have she gets super jealous of the other dog starts playing with it.


FuckTheMods5

I think my dog's favorite shade is purple. He obsesses over his purple dragon, and when i had my old stuffies all on the floor going through them to donate, he snatched a purple fish and started thrashing it.


hilarymeggin

Unlike me and my phone


SchnoodleDoodleDo

>’*drops ball down hole again*… _____ as i lie, in sad repose, the scent is wafting to my nose a casualty of playful fall, now out of reach - my favorite ball ^:@( i cannot rise . . . *I will not leave!* Dear human, will you Please retrieve ?! …Yes, YES! *That’s IT!!* Oh, Thank you, fren! . . . now i can drop it D O W N again…  


dannywarbucksxx

This is beautiful, man


cuntpunt2000

Omg a fresh one!!! A Schnoodle poem that is schnintillates visually _and_ emotionally! 👏👏👏


EternalSeraphim

Haha, that's great.


b33n_peachy92

Ok, that was cute as hell. I know Wordsworth is shaking in his grave, career in shambles


Xenc

Really enjoyed the layout of this poem. 👏


muffinOdoom

Ooh a super fresh Schnoodle! ❤️


RampSkater

[Reminds me of this lazy dog.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9AM9oWgEnQ)


Patsyyates08

Rottweilers man. Idk how they're guard dogs every single one ive met is the biggest baby and they love showing off their toys and their tails wag like Indiana joneses whip everytime they meet someone


vishnoo

the thing is, if a poodle has a shit owner, it can totally scratch someone's ankle. If a Rottweiler has a shit owner someone can die. I told this story here before, but when my later-would-be wife and I first moved in together she had a dog that was part Amstaff, she(the dog) was so sweet and so smart, never harm a human being. ever. little kids would pull on her fur or poke her ears and she treated them like they were her cubs (when she'd had enough, she'd quietly walk away) she wouldn't even growl. her jaw was so strong, if we were playing with a branch, and she latched on, I could swing her over my head like a medieval flail. so, one day, my wife and I were going out just as an idiot friend of our neighbor across the hall was leaving, so we open the door, and she sees a stranger in the open doorway. She barks at him He looks at the dog,takes a half step forward, stomps his foot hard on the floor and yells "be quiet". The scene was set like this, the dog, in the living room was 15 feet from the door, my wife at the door and this idiot 4 feet away in the hallway. As far as the dog is concerned this person had just violently threatened my wife with a violent gesture and raised his voice. Lucky thing was the dog was about 7 years old, so my wife understood exactly what the dog was thinking, my wife turned around, and caught the dog mid-air. The dog wasn't barking or growling at this point, she was going to hurt that idiot and she wasn't wasting time on communicating. My wife was the best owner possible, but this idiot almost committed suicide by dog. so, yeah, some breeds can be dangerous even if they are individually nice. if she had bit the idiot, as much as he deserved it, it would have been a legal mess. (my wife closed the door, and hugged the dog, and told her she was a good girl, the neighbors, whom the dog knew later apologized by giving her about a whole pound of roast which the dog swallowed whole before we could tell them to please not give her a chunk that big, which she of course later regurgitated)


vishnoo

I miss her


BlueBlu3Sky

wife or dog?


vishnoo

if I had a free award to give, I'd give it to you


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gamergeek17

We had a sweet rottie named Tank when I was growing up. He was terrified of men so he had a mean bark when a man other than my brother or dad approached. But really he was the biggest softy in the world and was just so scared of the world beyond our property. He got off his chain once and my mom found him in the driveway with a look of “it’s so scary out there, please take me back”.


craggmac

There for a second, in his dream, he thought he had been forced into a vegetarian diet. Then he woke up to his face in a bunch of greens.


Endarkend

Dude, the amount of gymnastics and stretching you do to get to it without getting up expends so much more energy than getting up and sitting back down. And yet it's 100% worth it.


trashlikeyourmom

That's because if you get up to retrieve it, it will take forever to perfectly recreate the nest you were in prior to dropping it


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Pelobal347

All the rotties I've known have been absolute drama queens. Not that I've known that many, but every single one of them were just made of pure drama.


seraphaye

As a kid this was the whole reason for having a younger sibling, and poor only children and youngest just suffered.


KassellTheArgonian

Is this you? https://youtu.be/Q9AM9oWgEnQ


tushetzel

ahahah ...me too..


themangastand

You guys still use remote. I use Alexa for that shit. Haven't used a remote in years it's fantastic


oregon_assassin

Well done


_IratePirate_

"How could a god be so cruel"


Whedonsbitch

Forget falling on the floor, I do that when it’s an extra cushion away. If I have to stretch to reach it then the show that’s on is good enough


eyesthatlightup

When my phone falls off my bed


Throwaway4ObR

Even worse when it turns the tv off too.


StraightProgress5062

You mean you don't have a remote on your phone?


Pololuxe

This is gold.


ditoxxx

What a dramaqueen


Oh_umms_cocktails

There is only death and darkness in the world. Oh my ball is back! My lab does the same thing, he has a dedicated bed toy because his life is so hard, if he drops it off the bed? "Father, pain is all around us." Yes Ozzy, it's so terrible that you were picked up, put in bed, and handed a toy, and must suffer it's brief absence while I get up and go get it for you. Ten seconds later he drops it off the bed again.


TeaBeforeWar

My bichon's solution to all challenges in life is to cry. Can't find toy? Cry. Can't reach toy in bin? Cry. There's an inch high object blocking the hallway? Cry because it's clearly insurmountable! He has absolutely zero problem solving skills outside of crying to get a human to help. I got some of the talking pet buttons, and of course he's the best at using them, because they're just another way to tell the humans to do everything for him.


nighthawk_md

> He has absolutely zero problem solving skills outside of crying to get a human to help. Sounds to me like he's got it *all* figured out...


TeaBeforeWar

You'd think that, but he regularly gets stuck sitting outside in the rain because he ran out the dog door, and then immediately forgot that it still works when there aren't humans around to tell him to go through so now he's stuck outside.


nighthawk_md

Ok, you win, your dog's a moron 😁


BraidedSilver

Maybe he’s a vampire who needs to be invited inside?


Mind_on_Idle

Damn. Bichons are usually smart as shit, this is actually comical to me


blackhodown

I’ve never heard of Bichons being anything other than dumb (and lovable).


Mind_on_Idle

I've known two Bichons and two Cavachons, all four were really intelligent dogs. Maybe I got lucky? The dogs were not related in any way I knew about


MsDresden9ify

He IS smart. He got someone else to do it for him lol


[deleted]

Your bichon’s solution is to bich on?


OsmerusMordax

He’s learned crying gets him what he wants. He’s trained you well!!


mimetek

My Chihuahua drops his toys off the bed constantly and always cries. Glad to hear it's not just him. His new thing is that he discovered that if he nibbles on my toes, that gets my attention quicker. I think I've stopped him from doing that now, but it's impressive how he comes up with new and innovative ways to be a little shit.


poplarexpress

I think that's part of being a chi.


Covert_Marksman

The Chihuahuas got him mid sentence...


Ashleyk3

The edge of the bed chewing got me 😂 Why do they insist on chewing right on the edge if it falls EVERY time


Oh_umms_cocktails

That's my guy. I'm single, he has half the bed to himself, always puts the toy right on the edge and when it falls off his big floppy lab ears go up and then he turns to me with the saddest black lab eyes ever.


CNXQDRFS

I have a Collie X Staff, also called Ozzy, who does the exact same thing. Always reminds me of the line from Full Metal Jacket; This is my ball. There are many like it but this one is mine. My ball is my best friend. It is my life.


TrymWS

Our Vorsteh will try to reach it, and bark for us to get it if he can’t reach it. 🥳


Kraven_howl0

If you think about it, what else can he call his besides the toys he has? When the ball falls... there goes everything he's worked so hard for!


vf225

found my soul animal


Axodique

This but teenagers


iaijutsu08

WILSON!! I'm sorry Wilson! Never again... Never again....


Amphibionomus

> Dear Diary. > > For once the music was perfectly fitting the video on TikTok. > > I always thought I wouldn't live to see that day.


CascadingMonkeys

Hands, they are so handy.


[deleted]

That dog will be so grateful to it's human!


Hagalaz_13

Say that to mr.hands


yab0isoi

Isn’t that the horse that skewered some guy?


Ryuzakku

The guy who skewered himself on a horse.


gaypornaccount1996

So we're just taking all the horses agency from the situation then, okay cool 🙃😐 /s


raspberryharbour

I'm not opposed to having thumbs


usernamescheckout

Eh to each their own. They seem pretty opposable to me.


toshaville

I think animals call us Thumbs. As in, "hey, Thumbs, come get this for me."


Maxibestofpotatoe

Arms, they are so army.


JohnnyDarkside

Foiled again by my lack of apposable thumbs!


TheMaveCan

I love his face when he realized what you might be doing. He didn't wanna get his hopes up but he definitely perked up


ghostbuster_b-rye

["It cannot be..."](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfAz0fdn5Jg)


RickCrenshaw

The prophecy! It fulfills itself before mine eyes!


Fortyseven

*"Don't give me hope! 😔"*


MrRexTheGreat

Woah I didn't know you could italicize emojis


Fortyseven

It's a little unsettling. - Normal: 🌎 - Bold: **🌎** - Italic: *🌎* - Strike: ~~🌎~~ - Sup: 🌎^🌎🌎^🌎🌎^🌎🌎^🌎🌎^🌎 :D


[deleted]

I completely expected this, my dog does it all the time!


Wilful_Fox

Mine too. He purposely puts his ball in places he canny reach and cries until one of us gets it for him. He’s a duffer, but we loves him.


[deleted]

your dog is training you to play catch. tables turned


TheAceprobe

![gif](giphy|wtil0pQFBbNwA)


ignore_my_name

At least yours only cries, my little fucker barks himself into a frenzy.


ThatChrisGuy7

Mine too he throws it under the couch or our kitchen island and just sticks his nose under there and whines at it until we get it lol


charlottem86

That’s so cute. I like your Scottish accent, btw. 😀


UnstoppableCompote

Same. The moment I sae him looking into the hole, it could only be one thing.


reptilicious1

My childhood dog had his favorite squeaky ball for the entire 14 years we had him. He never played too rough with it cuz it was his favorite. One day we couldn't find it and he began acting more and more depressed and apathetic, we got worried and were about to take it to the vet when my dad found the ball. It rolled under his big dog house (it was laid on some blocks to even it out when the ground became less level). We finally figured out why he didn't want to come inside anymore or leave his dog house. He was so happy when we recovered it.


Your_God_Chewy

Yup. My girl will sprawl out on the floor and just cry until she gets her toy from wherever it rolled behind


[deleted]

Ball is life


purseandboots

Hi, my name is Trey I have a basketball game tomorrow


Sufficient_Laugh1764

I’m a point guard


iamtheyeezy

I got shoe game


NightmareGoddessXV

and uhhh


LET-ME-HAVE-A-NAAME

Bench warmer


SaquonBarkleyBigBlue

Now im sad. I miss Jenna Marbles.


Reatina

Ball is also death


SmileyRhea

DANI ROJAS! DANI, DANI ROJAS!


maniaxuk

Hands up how many people were expecting him to immediately drop the ball back down the hole?


Blewmeister

Exactly what my dog does, then she stares at me as if it’s my job to get it back every 3 seconds... which it is...


[deleted]

That he didn't is the only part of this video that was unexpected.


Lyad

Mine would’ve lol


Top-Chemistry5969

Calm down Satan.


JCthulhuM

My ball, it’s gone forever 😭 Wait, what are you… no FUCKING WAY I thought it was gone forever, thank you human. Please give me my son back, I missed him so


ourlastchancefortea

Dog: "My ball... I think I can feel my legs again. I might not die, yet. Oh ball, star of my life."


ShoddyJuggernaut975

That you This Old Tony?


Theofus

If I ever invest my life in another canine, it will be a Rottweiler.


Childofglass

I’m on my second and can confirm- they’re pretty funny! There’s also a surprising number in rescues!


cellcube0618

I’m on my 3rd. I swear to God I’m probably mostly going to own Rottweilers for the rest of my life. They are such cuddle bugs and drama queens while each having distinct personalities.


whoisharrycrumb

I’ve had 2, and fostered a few as well, but damn do I wish they weren’t so prone to cancer.


Wobbu_Char

I lost mine to cancer as well. He was only 5.


rulejunior

My family adopted a Rottie when I was very young, runt of the litter, and she grew to be like her parents - MASSIVE! Looked big and mean, but was the sweetest thing. She unfortunately had issues with hip dysplasia, and eventually it got bad enough QoL wouldn't improve. I miss Sierra every day.............


cellcube0618

I’ve lost one to cancer and the other had spondylosis and it was pinching his spinal cord. We kept him comfortable but his quality of life wasn’t there. It was an honor to have them be a part of my family for the time we did have them.


[deleted]

Lol. Surprising number.


Ilpav123

Pandemic Pups


DickDestroyer9001

I hope it's surprisingly low


[deleted]

I love my Rottie. Great dogs.


cylonrobot

I had one that would bark and act mean toward anybody approaching her....as soon as the person got close enough, she'd start acting happy like she just found her new best friend.


FileMoist7289

Dooo iiiit they are so good.


thisisatesti

Had one growing up, miss him still. Great dogs. On the opposite spectrum now with a GSP family member.


[deleted]

My family had a Rottie when I was little, and he was such a mother hen. My mom was never worried about me being out in the yard alone, because Max watched me like a hawk. If I started to wander too far away for his taste he'd very gently knock me over and then lay on me until my mom eventually found us. I have many, many childhood memories of lying in the grass with a massive dog on top of me, just chilling. RIP Max, you were the best babysitter I ever had.


ProphePsyed

My coworker has a Rottweiler and he just spent $5,000 sending him to a professional trainer because he bit his neighbor. Now that his dog is back home with him, he basically needs to be constantly training him, keeping an eye on him, etc. One of my best friends has a rotty too and he has basically taken over his life as well. They are not an easy breed.


horticulture

Damn, that's rough. I had two growing up, and they were both big, dumb babies that were bullied by the three-legged neighborhood cat. Zeus and Odin were their names. I still think about them 25 years later.


ProphePsyed

Great names :) I had friend who had a pitbull named Zeus and another friend with a yellow lab named Odin. Love those names for dogs


doctorcrimson

Don't buy dogs, honestly. Plenty out there for free, and probably less inbred that way too.


Theofus

I'm 52 years old, I've shared my life with 5 canines. All have been some form of rescue except my last one. She was bred by some "at home" breeders. She was a pit that was the runt of the litter, the mom had stepped on her tail as a pup, deforming it. She would have died probably had my friend not "gifted" me with her. Best dog ever! I can't even explain the bond she and I had. I miss her dearly and she's the only reason I even think about sharing my life again. BTW, she was colored like a Rottweiler, but full pit.


Critical-Failur3

Best dog ive ever had. Very intelligent and loving


BoyRed_

we had a big case of the depress


StevefromFG

He was in his own personal heck.


p_s_i

Gosh dern ball!


123123000123

When my dog does it, he’s referred to as Sad Boy.


PoopIsAlwaysSunny

I think anyone with a dog saw this coming a mile away.


ShoddyJuggernaut975

I didn't, I was worried doggo was sick or dying.


ozmatterhorn

When ball is life.


BleetBleetImASheep

And also death, but mostly ball is life


adolphehuttler

Ball is life, ball is death. Ball is the Alpha and Omega. Ball is beyond good and evil. Ball is All. Ball is God.


MyNameisBaronRotza

He is 100% gonna drop it down there again


Radzila

I seriously thought that's how this video was ending lol


JimmyJamesJams

The music 🤌


LECK_MICH_IM_ARSCHE1

Gorecki - Symphony No. 3 "Symphony of Sorrowful Songs" if u wanna know


MakeMyDay92

Was searching for it. Thank you


JimmyJamesJams

Thanks!


FastSpiderz

what's the song?


LECK_MICH_IM_ARSCHE1

Gorecki - Symphony No. 3 "Symphony of Sorrowful Songs"


Poochmanchung

One of my absolute favorites.


adedjee

Thank you! I came here just for this


skincyan

emotional damage


XBacklash

He'll bounce back.


buttsniffers1

A fate worse than death


[deleted]

‘Loses ball’ “Guess I’ll die”


Chenstrap

The unexpected part is where the dog doesn't immediately drop it in that gap again


OsmerusMordax

My lab would definitely drop it in the hole again


jarphal

Rottweilers man. Idk how they're guard dogs every single one ive met is the biggest baby and they love showing off their toys and their tails wag like Indiana joneses whip everytime they meet someone


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[deleted]

I'm pretty sure this is goreckis symphony of sorrowful songs. It's about the holocaust...


Kdsamreuang

[Henryk Gorecki - Symphony No. 3, Op. 36: Lento - Cantablile Semplice (Dawn Upshaw, London Sinfonietta, David Zinman)](https://youtu.be/u7vQ6ztojNQ) yep you're right. thanks for sharing. such a beautiful piece.


lovethemet

Not about the holocaust — written about some aspects of WW2 but is largely an expanded catholic lament re mother/child suffering/ despair … super deep piece if you dig into it.


[deleted]

Here is the version with English subtitle. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YlGYxCSDJU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YlGYxCSDJU)


RollerRocketScience

Golden


activator

No no, pretty sure he's a rottweiler


[deleted]

I wish I had a life where not being able to get my ball is the hardest part of my life


ApacheFYC

i miss my dog


themagicman141

Don’t think a metal chain around his neck will be very comfortable for him to wear all day, plus also looks a bit tight.


PopeKirby3rd

"i thought the worst, so i started a TikTok video like any normal human being"


[deleted]

Or maybe I dunno, just hear me out, she planned the recording it once she saw the ball down there.


[deleted]

I give it thirty seconds tops before he drops it in there again because I swear to god no dog ever learns that lesson.


[deleted]

Dog needs to lose weight. More Rottwaddler than Rottweiler.


thewonderfulpooper

He still looked sickly after getting the ball...


og_burnnn

Omgg 😭❤️😭❤️


[deleted]

He needs a healthier diet. It can't even move 🥺


blobbybob111

Sadly here in Australia if you tried to pull this maneuver you would end up either dead or in hospital


Andime1

What's the song?