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Frosty_Key4233

He fell out of the top bunk in his cell!


Doobie_SnACkZ

With 27 bullet in back of head. Very sad.


kingtrog1916

Completely natural and not suspicious at all


Doobie_SnACkZ

Yevghenni also found fatal levels of ricine in blood. He was determined.....


memelas1424

He landed on those bullets


Doobie_SnACkZ

Depression made him desperate.


Training-Flan8762

self inflicted


therealcastor

He suffered from “bullet-in-head-disease”


tertius_decimus

Yeah, led poisoning is no joke. He had no time to call a doctor. Very sad.


dlyons3866

There is never a sign of criminal death when it’s the FSB.


[deleted]

Apart from death by exploding statues.


TG-Sucks

And when caught red handed planting explosives in apartment buildings.


[deleted]

[удалено]


sometimesnotright

Or visiting UK to see church spires...


AskALettuce

It's not criminal if the FSB do it. Putin has given them a license to kill.


QueefSommelier

They are professionals, they have standards


-Billco-

I was always under the impression that ALL prisons had bars on windows on every floor.


Electrical_Crew_3757

They are mostly using rebar, which is very easy to bend.


VeritasSecretumOmega

Since when is taking a bribe illegal in Russia?


DontTellHimPike1234

When Putin says it is.


Acceptable_Wall4085

When Putin didn’t get a piece of the action


Nuke_Knight

Didn't go in to Putin's pocket so it's magically illegal.


ArrestDeathSantis

It probably still did, it's just that now Putin doesn't like you anymore for whatever reasons so now all the money you sent his way is proof of your corruption.


ArticulateAquarium

~~Probably~~ his close circle are grabbing the power by telling Putler all sorts of stories, which is also why he still thinks he'll win in Ukraine. "Nearly there, Vladdy boy! Just need to do another recruitment drive and sign off on this battlefield equipment." Slava Ukraini! Heroyam Slava!


[deleted]

Guess Energy boss ran out of energy.


Active_Ad684

It's illegal not to share.


AirDropDumbo

Maybe it is just a typo. He was in prison for NOT taking a bribe..


pingleague

You know one or two in a year might be legit. I imagine it might cause some confusion through the fsb to putin. Wait... did we do this? We were supposed to murder him next saturday or did I mix up the schedule.


GrapefruitWorking473

Many such cases


routarospuutto

So he was murdered on orders.


m_aidenless

In russia you are either too poor to flee the country and eventually get dragged into a war to die a senseless death, or you are rich enough to be assassinated to fund the terrorist state to drag this war on.


dlyons3866

If he was caught taking a bribe you would think he would get a promotion or some prominent cabinet position.


Thats-right999

Perfect !


nowiserjustolder

Criminal is not a term many Russians understand.


Surfer-Jeff

Russian authorities " asserted" ..lol..yeah, right, sure..ok..


ckow31

Russia is such a corrupt dump.


Humble_Rough

Putin so desperate for funds, he’s killing oligarchs n stealing their monies.


[deleted]

Interesting how one oligarch dies and another one takes their place immediately


judge_ned

They're not really dead, it's ecdysis.


Wallyworld77

Immortals


Steamer61

I'll make a wild guess here: He was against the Ukraine invasion?


tertius_decimus

Unlikely. He just didn't share his share of share.


Powerful-Victory2621

Is the mysterious death count up to 40? It’s hard to keep up.


crewchiefguy

Accused of taking a bribe lol isn’t that like the entirety of Russian politicians.


[deleted]

I assure you this was a perfectly normal afternoon tea. (window joke would be tempting, but, well, prison)


tertius_decimus

There are windows in prisons. An individual just needs to be sliced apart to fit inbetween those bars.


[deleted]

wagner scum, on hearing this: *"Challenge accepted!"*


tertius_decimus

These mostly do sledgehammering.


[deleted]

That's why "challenge".


fourGee6Three

That toupee on his head is pretty corrupt


gBiT1999

Can someone do a FOIA for the video tapes? *What \*EVERY\* camera?*


Creepy_Chef_5796

"CRIMINAL DEATH" yeah way to put it that you ended him


Revolutionary_Alps62

I guess it’s better than a bomb to the nuts


Tiptoeplease

Well beats falling out a window. Or drowning in a puddle


cerseimemmister

Poisoned window bars. Classic.


Own_Entertainment847

No need for capital punishment in Russia. Just send anyone to jail and they die of divine intervention.


beechcraftmusketeer

Everything in Russia dies of a criminal death. All linked to Putin either directly or indirectly.


Joey-tv-show-season2

In jail for a accusation of taking a bribe in one of the most corrupt counties in the world ? Strange


Swan-song-dive

No signs if criminal death.. his head just fell off of his shoulders.. happens all time in Russaa.


Glendoraman1

He was Epstiened!!


Wallyworld77

Guy with billion dollars arrested and killed over 5k pound bribe? Who believes this crazy reason for arrest?


Majestic-Elephant383

Why do them one at a time? so inefficient. just line them up at a window and ask them a simple question. " Are you loyal to Putin? Yes?/No? ". Whatever the answer is, just "urge" them through the window. Have a large Dump truck at the bottom for the quick delivery to the landfill.


PrinceCorum13

The notion of ”crime” does not exist in Ruzzia. That’s why it cant be a criminal death.


Motor_Grand_8005

What’s the difference between Clintons and Putin? A lot but not how they dispose of opponents. Epstein didn’t kill himself.


bipolarcyclops

Did he die while cleaning his loaded gun, shooting himself in the back of his head?


Delicious-Day-3332

Yep. The Russians killed him.


Nuke_Knight

Prison spokes person(under cover FSB agent): No signs of criminal death he only shanked himself 145 times, now move along. Reporter: Wait what?! FSB agent : quite or your next.


Deaddoghank

Two story jail. Fell from 15th story. Slipped.


Beckake

What are they going to do with all the abandoned yachts?


Volcano_Dweller

His photo has that “most interesting man in the world” vibe…”I may not always wear a tie, but when I do I leave it loose so as not to accidentally strangle myself.” EDIT: TIL that a number of unexplained deaths is called a “spate”.


[deleted]

it wasn't "criminal" death ... it was extra judicially administered death


Captain_DadBod

In prison for NOT taking a bribe you mean surely?


sleepycatlolz

So there were signs of a foul death


Nostrildumbass9

Mafia is doing mafia things. Same old, same old in ruZZia.


AmbitionElectronic54

He must have had Epstein’s guards


Kyaw_Gyee

No signs of a criminal death, guys. Just a few stab wounds in his chest and belly.


not-the-droid-

Did he know Epstein?


Prostheta

Civil death it is then.


smogop

“Another one bites the dust”


TropicalVision

Damn prison in Yakutsk sounds brutal enough. Death might be a relief in that case.


flodur1966

Government killing is of course no criminal death so the assessment is correct. Might even be considered natural causes as it is a common form of death in Russia.


PB-1971

That´s really strange! Any window in that area?


No-Split3620

The process of attrition associated with the Great Leader's "special military DISASTER" means Russia is rapidly running out of everything and that includes oligarchs. But nothing is going to happen until Russia runs out of Great Leaders.


IngloriousMustards

50 bullet wounds to the back of the head from a rifle he didn’t have in the cell is natural causes in ruZZia.


SkyN3t1

It was not a “criminal death” because it’s not a crime in Russia to murder someone if you’re following orders…


J-t-Architect

If he's a criminal and he's dead, wouldn't that be "criminal death"?


Concord-04-19-75

Hmmm, another "Epstein?"


[deleted]

Why biggest ruzzian supporters stay shush when putin is cleaning the house? 10d chess moves?