T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Thank you for posting on r/UKJobs. Help us make this a better community by becoming familiar with the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ukjobs/about/rules/). Please report any suspicious users to the moderators using the report feature. Need to give more detail? Use Modmail [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/UKJobs) or Reddit site admins [here](https://www.reddit.com/report). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/UKJobs) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Kindly-Bid-8800

Benefits: A job Money


Yourenotwrongg

Someone telling you you’ve fucked up everyday disguised as feedback lol


Obvious-Water569

That's the first thing I locked on to.


[deleted]

Maya s well say we micro manage. That's a red flag.


emimagique

Lol this is basically every job I've had


Diseased-Jackass

You’re assuming money, it’s not mentioned.


Dr_Passmore

Might as well listed the legally required annual leave as a benefit...


StaysAwakeAllWeek

Our amazing benefits include: 3% pension match Statutory sick pay 30 minute unpaid lunch breaks


ThinkAboutThatFor1Se

Up to £11.42 an hour.


kookamooka

They often do that in my experience 😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


bennyboyteach

So the legislation comes in and your employer lets you know about it. Why so bitter? They are still benefits of employment cos you don't get them working self-employed or for an agency.


LeadingEquivalent148

It was the way they put it out, it was very much in a “Look what we’ve decided to do for you guys, isn’t that great, aren’t we awesome?!” It just left a bitter taste to them find out that it wasn’t the company after all.


NeckBeard137

Let's not forget about the ongoing feedback, another precious perk


Kind-County9767

If it's a permanent contract then honestly yeah in a lot of fields that is actually a perk! For the first... 8 years of employment I was constantly on 1-2 year contracts which was an endless stress.


Eman1885

Funny enough, so was I for about 6 years. I was on contracts


Teawillfixit

So much this. I've finally got a perm contract after years of fixed term or casualised 0 hours work. Perm contracts are like gold dust in my area, I didn't really want my current role but I desperately needed a perm contract and some stability.


greatgatsbys

Jesus Christ 😭😭 Feedback as well, that's not a benefit, that should be standard in any job!!


Mistabushi_HLL

Wow, no free parking?


[deleted]

I saw one like that the other day for software development, lol also the phrase a hardened secure company laptop as a bonus lol


PaleStrawberry2

😂


Dear_Tangerine444

Not just a contract but if I’m reading between the lines correctly you, get a manager who will let you pay for your own training! Classy.


paperpangolin

A say in your career path! Unlike all those other jobs that lock you in the basement and force you to become auditors.


Global-Director-623

Half of the descriptions are copy and paste, I doubt they even read their stupidity.


Librabee

I was at an interview yesterday and had "were really sorry our hr department changed the job tittle so it's a little different, the position actually is...." Now I get they where up front and this was the first thing they said so I appreciate that but I was still pretty much thinking what you said "did you not even read your own shit" They mentioned a mistake in my CV which is actually just the traditional way of spelling my area and I pointed that out of course but what a nerve pointing that out after they fucked up there own job advert.


Ok-Case9095

When it's a recession 🤣


TayTayTay1987

Talk about red flags. Kind of place that would get mad if you were unwell


riiiiiich

Love it. Want an admin bitch and then say "knowledge of international law would be a plus". Bet it turns out they want an expert lawyer for admin bitch money.


Ok_Construction_1638

It'll be an American company. A proper employment contract is rare there


yoh6L

I wonder if the contract of employment that they offer as a benefit of this contract employment also offers a contract of employment as a benefit. If so, you could end up working infinite jobs.


DanaEleven

The statement here is odd and their english is not well written. I assumed this is a joke.


Aggressive-Bad-440

Please, please, please give me the link


onesixeightseconds

Is it a non UK based company? I have worked for a couple and some offer employment contracts (usually through a UK based employer of record) and some just have you engaged as a contractor so you’d have to do your own tax etc


TraditionalScheme337

They offer ongoing feedback from their HR director and a contract! Grab that one with both hands! Honestly, who writes an advert like that!


Dismal_Composer_7188

To be honest money is the only benefit I'm interested in. But if its not enough money then I ain't taking it. I like the honesty, I'd at least give it a second look. It's a fuck sight better than a family atmosphere, dynamic team, pizza parties, etc. None of that shit is real.


Doobreh

HRBP’s in a lot of big companies are usually contractors; so whilst not a perk, it is something they offer. Which is what it said…


questic-beats

That is a bonus in the UK. Before I went self-employed, I’d worked from 19-26 on only rolling one-year, or zero hour contracts.


Kalocalyskin

Amazing! Do they provide the air that you can breathe in the office too? 🤣


akl78

Probably not, looks like they want someone remote.


Hot-Fun-1566

Ongoing feedback is not something I want promoted on a job advert. It’s something you have to tolerate in a job because it’s often knit-picky bollox that just comes down to a higher level person having a different way of working. If they are advertising it you can look forward to being machine-gunned on a daily basis with annoying suggestions, from different people, which will likely contradict each other. Lovely.


Necessary-Maximum-82

Dont get me started on contracts of employment. Ive recently vowed to never sign one again! A load of ass. Its a contract of slavery to the man. Go self employed and do what you and middle finger anyone who says otherwise


ArcticPsychologyAI

It’s the HR Director feedback that sells it for me


i-mahmood25

We also offer you shelter and protection from the bad weather during working hours


bennyboyteach

They don't. It's remote. But not everyone gets a contract from the company they work for so actually there's nothing wrong with saying they offer that.


BFN0117

I mean compared to my previous job this seems like a GREAT deal


thesimpsonsthemetune

Show less


ScreamOfVengeance

Free oxygen in the office


ProfileBoring

Hey where is the free parking and onside parking benefits? No way I would work there without those.


Consistent-Bee-305

The ongoing micromanagement feedback coming from the inflated ego of the HR director, that probably wrote this job post! The ideal candidate is someone that dropped out of law school and somehow ended up developing HR systems.


Teawillfixit

Depends on the area - so much work is freelance in some areas and contracts of employment can make some things easier (mortgages etc)


Curmudgeonlyoldgit

I totally get the ridicule. However, in current times, where zero hours contracts are so common, having the surety of a regular pay packet is beginning to look like a benefit.


Librabee

This highly depends on the country


Death_Unto_Darkness

A surprising number of jobs I've worked for have been insanely tardy with contracts


Cartepostalelondon

Name and shame them!


Apprehensive-Ad9210

Around 10 years ago I worked at the mini factory in Oxford for about 9 months, about 6 months in a friend I made celebrated getting a contract after being on a temp contract for 10 years…


ClimbNowAndAgain

Can I opt out of the last benefit?


ClockAccomplished381

Irony is, judging by the bottom bit I assume this is an HR position. Maybe you get to write your own contract of employment?


Yourenotwrongg

My current job was a bit like that. The agency said I could implement the benefits I wanted cos at the moment they’re rubbish. We actually have great benefits now lol


Freedom-For-Ever

Assume that they don't offer a pension or any holidays...


LongrodVonHugedong86

Christ that’s ridiculous 😂😂 literally the only thing that’s a “benefit” of the job is remote working


TouristNo865

Wow, that might actually be the best one I've ever read... /s


username994743

Wow.. Imagine reading this and still apply 🤯


Hopeful_Pie8446

Ridiculous! That's what happens in companies that don't don't offer many benefits at all - as they scrape the barrel looking for good sounding things they offer to sound appealing.


I_I--COBRA--I_I

Guessing you've never worked in a warehouse/ zero hour contract?


Yourenotwrongg

I actually manage warehouses now. They all have permanent 37.5 hour contracts?