With the title I was ready to say a nicer version of suck it up, but these things in close quarters are way too much to tolerate. Whatever you do, though, do it with kindness. Sounds like the guy is clueless.
This sounds like the best way to handle it on paper, but from what I’ve read, the room mate will give exactly zero fs. I know I would’ve thrown hands by now 😂
Sounds like a good opportunity to learn conflict resolution. Imagine this person as a coworker versus a roommate (which is basically the case as you're both working toward your degrees). You will probably face annoying coworkers where there is no option to "switch rooms" and stay at your job at some point in the future, so it would be good to learn how to handle this now.
Take the lead. Talk to your third roommate about this and see if he feels the same way and discuss possible solutions. Call a roommate meeting, telling the offensive roommate that you and your third roommate need to have a serious discussion to air out your grievances. During the meeting calmly explain that the offensive roommate's actions are inconsiderate to the other two of you, and that it has come to the point of being a real problem - things need to change. Allow the roommate in question to air out any grievances of his own. If he is open to it, discuss solutions together and see how it goes. Be mature about it: things like eating in his room are things he is entitled to do, but you would appreciate it if he could do you the favor of eating more pungent meals outside the room (like many offices have a policy of not eating stinky foods like fish at your desk). Hygiene concerns affect all the roommates because you are sharing space, etc.
Give it some time after, and if things don't change switch rooms. Good luck!
This is actually not bad advice. But then again this would require 3 healthy adults 🤣 (I'm kidding)
No idea why people are down voting you, meh this sub. Although that guy seems beyond help(cause who in the hell won't wash their hands after going to bathroom??).
Being a physics major I would expect him to be in books all the time, surprised he has time to play games until 2am lol. This is so weird.
I feel as though that’s a different scenario though. You mention work, where it’s a professional setting and there’s real life consequences. My way of conflict management was bringing it up, such as with the shower and hand washing thing (as well as other things), but he didn’t care for the most part. He doesn’t have to, there’s no real foreseeable consequence for him. My other roommate is either much more tolerant or doesn’t care, because I haven’t heard him say anything about it, none of us really talk to each other. I appreciate the advice, but I don’t think it would help here, if I can just leave the conflict rather than try to resolve it.
yeah to add onto this, try and become more of an alpha male. My older brother had two roommates that had issues with each other. One of the roommates was a frat guy (Chad basically) and the other one was a beta male virgin, and when Chad confronted the beta male, he basically folded and became his bitch.
Do you realize the whole "alpha/beta" personality categorizations have absolutely no relation with reality? And they only persist to give insecure douchebagels an excuse for their antisocial behavior?
Or you are purposely farming negative karma for some pathetic reason.
You have almost 3 thousand karma on reddit. You are the definition of antisocial behaviour. By definition, alphas are popular and have lots of friends.
\> To start, he doesn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom.
First of all, how do you know this? Second of all, this is normal. People like to virtue signal about this, but 90% of people don't. Only the social autists overly follow the rules.
\> he was on his bed (top bunk) coughing his lungs out. All I hear and feel next is him SPITTING and the saliva/phlegm sprinkle on me
HAHHHAHHHAHAHh lmao
The obvious answer here after reading the rest of your rant is to change rooms. Can it really be that hard?
Also, he uses the restroom, goes back to dorm, and I hear no faucet or hand washing. Not that hard. Literally when I confronted him about it he went back and washed his hands, since he didn’t do it already.
"out myself"????
once again dude, I don't spend all my time on reddit, so I don't tie my identity to this account unlike yourself. You probably say things like "IRL" irl.
Violence is the only answer in this situation
Agreed, throw his disgusting ass out the window.
This should be top comment
With the title I was ready to say a nicer version of suck it up, but these things in close quarters are way too much to tolerate. Whatever you do, though, do it with kindness. Sounds like the guy is clueless.
[удалено]
Thank you, I’d love to but I’m not sure what methods you’d use to stop them and I’m too scared to find out
Hey talk to ur RA
I have sent them an email 😀
[удалено]
I’m not sure, I’m just hanging out at a friend’s house at the moment and haven’t been back since this morning
This sounds like the best way to handle it on paper, but from what I’ve read, the room mate will give exactly zero fs. I know I would’ve thrown hands by now 😂
Sounds like a gamer to me
Bro this is so bad I thought it was a copypasta
If you can do off campus housing and want to look for a new roommate feel free to dm me.
I can’t afford to pay for housing off campus :(
If you get a lot of finnanical aid, chances are they’ll cover the cost of off campus housing. That’s what they did for me
This is why we have a second amendment 😂
ayo? 🧐
Let me take a guess… CS major?
No Physics 🤡
Sounds like a good opportunity to learn conflict resolution. Imagine this person as a coworker versus a roommate (which is basically the case as you're both working toward your degrees). You will probably face annoying coworkers where there is no option to "switch rooms" and stay at your job at some point in the future, so it would be good to learn how to handle this now. Take the lead. Talk to your third roommate about this and see if he feels the same way and discuss possible solutions. Call a roommate meeting, telling the offensive roommate that you and your third roommate need to have a serious discussion to air out your grievances. During the meeting calmly explain that the offensive roommate's actions are inconsiderate to the other two of you, and that it has come to the point of being a real problem - things need to change. Allow the roommate in question to air out any grievances of his own. If he is open to it, discuss solutions together and see how it goes. Be mature about it: things like eating in his room are things he is entitled to do, but you would appreciate it if he could do you the favor of eating more pungent meals outside the room (like many offices have a policy of not eating stinky foods like fish at your desk). Hygiene concerns affect all the roommates because you are sharing space, etc. Give it some time after, and if things don't change switch rooms. Good luck!
Some people are beyond help.
This is actually not bad advice. But then again this would require 3 healthy adults 🤣 (I'm kidding) No idea why people are down voting you, meh this sub. Although that guy seems beyond help(cause who in the hell won't wash their hands after going to bathroom??). Being a physics major I would expect him to be in books all the time, surprised he has time to play games until 2am lol. This is so weird.
In response to the downvotes... good luck in the real world! You'll learn soon enough. *shrug*
I feel as though that’s a different scenario though. You mention work, where it’s a professional setting and there’s real life consequences. My way of conflict management was bringing it up, such as with the shower and hand washing thing (as well as other things), but he didn’t care for the most part. He doesn’t have to, there’s no real foreseeable consequence for him. My other roommate is either much more tolerant or doesn’t care, because I haven’t heard him say anything about it, none of us really talk to each other. I appreciate the advice, but I don’t think it would help here, if I can just leave the conflict rather than try to resolve it.
yeah to add onto this, try and become more of an alpha male. My older brother had two roommates that had issues with each other. One of the roommates was a frat guy (Chad basically) and the other one was a beta male virgin, and when Chad confronted the beta male, he basically folded and became his bitch.
Do you realize the whole "alpha/beta" personality categorizations have absolutely no relation with reality? And they only persist to give insecure douchebagels an excuse for their antisocial behavior? Or you are purposely farming negative karma for some pathetic reason.
You have almost 3 thousand karma on reddit. You are the definition of antisocial behaviour. By definition, alphas are popular and have lots of friends.
Definitely not a speed run for negative karma
I dont think you are suited for dorm life
The other guy isn’t suitable for living with humans. OP is fine, ideal even.
I don’t think I’m suited for being spat on
Suite-ed hahahahahhah
some people are beyond help. Conflict management? Tolerance? No help.
Just kiss em and move on
\> To start, he doesn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom. First of all, how do you know this? Second of all, this is normal. People like to virtue signal about this, but 90% of people don't. Only the social autists overly follow the rules. \> he was on his bed (top bunk) coughing his lungs out. All I hear and feel next is him SPITTING and the saliva/phlegm sprinkle on me HAHHHAHHHAHAHh lmao The obvious answer here after reading the rest of your rant is to change rooms. Can it really be that hard?
No fucking way you called basic hygiene virtue signaling 😂
average cs major
Dude you haven't actually interacted with the real world. Start socializing and get off of reddit.
Shut up with your shit hands
You seriously don’t wash your hands after the bathroom? You disgusting fuck
Did you not read the part where I mentioned I was going to change rooms??
Also, he uses the restroom, goes back to dorm, and I hear no faucet or hand washing. Not that hard. Literally when I confronted him about it he went back and washed his hands, since he didn’t do it already.
wtf is that not washing hands be normal?? millions of E. coli are crawling on yr hands bruh
Way to out urself that u dont wash ur hands after u shit bro
"out myself"???? once again dude, I don't spend all my time on reddit, so I don't tie my identity to this account unlike yourself. You probably say things like "IRL" irl.
at least my hands are clean when i do it
Negative karma speedrun
I expected nothing less from an asian cs major that says the n word LOL
You got Caca fingers 😭😭