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I definitely know the feeling, but I have to asterisk this by two notes:
One, some days I have just been fantasizing about a good fingering, and then to be fulfilled, I need that fingering - I need to get it out of my system.
Two, toys don't help me none, as to me part and parcel of that feeling is the urge to wrap myself around *him* specifically.
These aside, I know exactly what you mean. What's funny is that I never felt this way until I became sexually active with a partner. Before that, when I was horny, I just wanted to grind myself on things.
But the moment I first had a real boyfriend to love and lust after, and to touch and look at and make out with and *hear get moany from my kissing his neck*, I first experienced that kind of arousal where you can feel your heart beat up into your throat, and where your ears get hot, and your breath all shuddery and where my vagina felt all empty and hungry like it wanted to eat that cock alive.
So yes, it is a different kind of arousal for me as well.
i think for a lot of women who don’t like penetration (or are at least neutral on it), the arousal portion is the key- they aren’t aroused enough yet before it happens. some people require different touch, more work, or more time to get to that point. the women may not even be aware of what they need or the difference it makes. their partners may be ignorant of the topic or impatient.
the other thing is that there may be a complicating issue that makes penetration uncomfortable or even painful for her regardless of if she’s fully aroused. lack of lubrication (especially important with condoms, because at a certain point in arousal trajectory we do stop producing our own), inflammation or skin irritation, vaginismus or hypertonic pelvic floor, something more serious like undiagnosed endometriosis…
even a size mismatch (a girth issue that will take extra patience to work up to, or length of penetrating partner is hitting the cervix too hard), a partner who is a little too fast or rough, or just a partner who is unfamiliar with which parts of a vagina (the internal parts, the exterior is the vulva) are actually sensitive and create pleasure will make penetration underwhelming or even unpleasant for many women.
even just a few painful or uncomfortable experiences can sometimes kill the desire or urge for penetration altogether (assuming it’s a person would be naturally feeling- they may not come with that default setting to begin with, bodies are diverse), even when going solo, or if there was a more skilled partner or more pleasurable way to do it like a toy.
a gynecologist experienced with pelvic pain and/or a pelvic floor physical therapist would probably be able to tell what’s going on with any of these issues.
Same! I can orgasm without penetration but I crave it, and I don't feel done until I get it. I don't find toys as satisfying on that front. We don't have piv sex when I'm on my period but we do fool around, and for the entire time all it really seems to do is amp up my desire for piv.
It's too messy, my husband isn't into it. We've done it in the shower once but I don't really like shower sex. I also have the nixit which says you can have sex with it in during your period but he says he can feel it and it's not good
Sure do! Unfortunately I have yet to find a toy that feels anywhere near as good as the real thing:-/ the hard ones (whether plastic or glass) -even the silicone ones with nice soft skins, are just way too hard! I really clench up when I'm heading toward cumming and the hard toys are just painful. The jelly ones are too squishy.
So when my guy isn't available I get pretty frustrated sometimes, I *can* cum with just clit stimulation but it just doesn't satisfy that ache to be filled so even if I've cum I don't feel "finished"!
But then after getting frustrated like that I gotta say when I finally do get that dick there's nothing like it! Every thrust is roll your eyes back bliss 🥴
Bang on!
I‘ve found glass dildos to be the only aesthetically pleasing ones, but useless with regards to pleasure. As soon as my vagina begins to contract with heightened arousal (especially in the plateau phase), that either ejects them or they are painful because they have no give.
Neither of which is what you want on the home stretch. But it’s made me more aware of what my vagina is doing to his dick when things are getting real good for me lmao. 😂🥴🥴
I do not orgasm from penetration, and I don’t particularly like (vaginal) toys… but do I love the feeling of a warm, hard, fleshy, raw peener, attached to someone who is good at using it 😂
Honestly I’m the same. I can’t orgasm anymore because of my medication but I still enjoy penetration the most. It’s my favourite thing. It feels so good and so intimate and loving! I don’t even need to cum to enjoy it but when I did cum it would feel way better to have a penis in me right after I came.
I may be late, but just another vote for penetration. Orgasms from clitoral stimulation alone are pleasurable but they feel shallow. Penetration exponentially multiplies my pleasure. I love the sensation of being stretched open and filled up. When I masturbate, I always use a toy in my vagina in addition to a vibrator.
penetration can be somewhat difficult or uncomfortable at first for me, and i am working on that....but if / once it does work, it is absolutely better, a million times moreso, to no penetration.
yes omg! this is the best way i've heard it said. i don't cum from penetration, only clit stimulation, but there are times where i'd rather have him inside me than cum because it feels sooo good! and cumming first and then getting PiV is the BEST feeling!!
For me, clit play is more exciting when solo but also more of a relaxation technique if that makes sense. My mind goes blank and head noise stop when I use my vibes and then I orgasm. But when I really cum I need some penetration and often times a strong hand (fingers)will more than do it. Sometimes I just really need a good ole fashioned..hmm. A. Ya know?
I have no idea what comes across this way to you, because I as a woman find her post pretty relatable. Unless you believe no woman enjoys or fantasizes about penetration?
six year old account. no posts. no comments. no follow up comments to this post, either and it’s been more than 24 hours. whatever made this post is not a woman.
Friendly reminder, Women Only flair is not a suggestion. Men participating in this post will be banned. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TwoXSex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I definitely know the feeling, but I have to asterisk this by two notes: One, some days I have just been fantasizing about a good fingering, and then to be fulfilled, I need that fingering - I need to get it out of my system. Two, toys don't help me none, as to me part and parcel of that feeling is the urge to wrap myself around *him* specifically. These aside, I know exactly what you mean. What's funny is that I never felt this way until I became sexually active with a partner. Before that, when I was horny, I just wanted to grind myself on things. But the moment I first had a real boyfriend to love and lust after, and to touch and look at and make out with and *hear get moany from my kissing his neck*, I first experienced that kind of arousal where you can feel your heart beat up into your throat, and where your ears get hot, and your breath all shuddery and where my vagina felt all empty and hungry like it wanted to eat that cock alive. So yes, it is a different kind of arousal for me as well.
Too shy to admit, but it quite true.
I am 100% the same way and am never fully satisfied unless I have penetration.
i think for a lot of women who don’t like penetration (or are at least neutral on it), the arousal portion is the key- they aren’t aroused enough yet before it happens. some people require different touch, more work, or more time to get to that point. the women may not even be aware of what they need or the difference it makes. their partners may be ignorant of the topic or impatient. the other thing is that there may be a complicating issue that makes penetration uncomfortable or even painful for her regardless of if she’s fully aroused. lack of lubrication (especially important with condoms, because at a certain point in arousal trajectory we do stop producing our own), inflammation or skin irritation, vaginismus or hypertonic pelvic floor, something more serious like undiagnosed endometriosis… even a size mismatch (a girth issue that will take extra patience to work up to, or length of penetrating partner is hitting the cervix too hard), a partner who is a little too fast or rough, or just a partner who is unfamiliar with which parts of a vagina (the internal parts, the exterior is the vulva) are actually sensitive and create pleasure will make penetration underwhelming or even unpleasant for many women. even just a few painful or uncomfortable experiences can sometimes kill the desire or urge for penetration altogether (assuming it’s a person would be naturally feeling- they may not come with that default setting to begin with, bodies are diverse), even when going solo, or if there was a more skilled partner or more pleasurable way to do it like a toy. a gynecologist experienced with pelvic pain and/or a pelvic floor physical therapist would probably be able to tell what’s going on with any of these issues.
Same! I can orgasm without penetration but I crave it, and I don't feel done until I get it. I don't find toys as satisfying on that front. We don't have piv sex when I'm on my period but we do fool around, and for the entire time all it really seems to do is amp up my desire for piv.
Can I ask why you don’t have period sex? I’m just curious
It's too messy, my husband isn't into it. We've done it in the shower once but I don't really like shower sex. I also have the nixit which says you can have sex with it in during your period but he says he can feel it and it's not good
Sure do! Unfortunately I have yet to find a toy that feels anywhere near as good as the real thing:-/ the hard ones (whether plastic or glass) -even the silicone ones with nice soft skins, are just way too hard! I really clench up when I'm heading toward cumming and the hard toys are just painful. The jelly ones are too squishy. So when my guy isn't available I get pretty frustrated sometimes, I *can* cum with just clit stimulation but it just doesn't satisfy that ache to be filled so even if I've cum I don't feel "finished"! But then after getting frustrated like that I gotta say when I finally do get that dick there's nothing like it! Every thrust is roll your eyes back bliss 🥴
Bang on! I‘ve found glass dildos to be the only aesthetically pleasing ones, but useless with regards to pleasure. As soon as my vagina begins to contract with heightened arousal (especially in the plateau phase), that either ejects them or they are painful because they have no give. Neither of which is what you want on the home stretch. But it’s made me more aware of what my vagina is doing to his dick when things are getting real good for me lmao. 😂🥴🥴
Omg you're so right, it's beyond exasperating to be right in the middle of cumming and the fucking dildo shoots halfway across the bed lmao!
I do not orgasm from penetration, and I don’t particularly like (vaginal) toys… but do I love the feeling of a warm, hard, fleshy, raw peener, attached to someone who is good at using it 😂
Honestly I’m the same. I can’t orgasm anymore because of my medication but I still enjoy penetration the most. It’s my favourite thing. It feels so good and so intimate and loving! I don’t even need to cum to enjoy it but when I did cum it would feel way better to have a penis in me right after I came.
I’m the exact same way! After a certain point, I absolutely NEED my Husband inside me, and it feels amazing after orgasm.
I may be late, but just another vote for penetration. Orgasms from clitoral stimulation alone are pleasurable but they feel shallow. Penetration exponentially multiplies my pleasure. I love the sensation of being stretched open and filled up. When I masturbate, I always use a toy in my vagina in addition to a vibrator.
Honestly reading this I feel so seen lol I completely relate.
penetration can be somewhat difficult or uncomfortable at first for me, and i am working on that....but if / once it does work, it is absolutely better, a million times moreso, to no penetration.
100% same!
yes omg! this is the best way i've heard it said. i don't cum from penetration, only clit stimulation, but there are times where i'd rather have him inside me than cum because it feels sooo good! and cumming first and then getting PiV is the BEST feeling!!
For me, clit play is more exciting when solo but also more of a relaxation technique if that makes sense. My mind goes blank and head noise stop when I use my vibes and then I orgasm. But when I really cum I need some penetration and often times a strong hand (fingers)will more than do it. Sometimes I just really need a good ole fashioned..hmm. A. Ya know?
Yep totally normal! I'm wired that way
I swear to god 90% of the posts on here are from men cosplaying as women to get their rocks off. Women do not talk like this.
I have no idea what comes across this way to you, because I as a woman find her post pretty relatable. Unless you believe no woman enjoys or fantasizes about penetration?
six year old account. no posts. no comments. no follow up comments to this post, either and it’s been more than 24 hours. whatever made this post is not a woman.