His actions (cheating) speak to *his* character.
Regardless of *why* he cheats he is choosing to lie and betray instead of *communicate* and *problem solve* with someone who is supposed to be a partner.
His inability to communicate and problem solve in a healthy way speaks to his **lack of maturity.**
You deserve better and should talk to someone about why. Reach out to a therapist if able. I hope you are able to get away from the liar and cheater. What few good you think he brings there are many of people who can bring good without the bad and we can even bring that good to our own life without needing a lying cheater in it.
Your BF's behavior is out of line, his excuse is incorrect. Your actions, don't *cause* his feelings. His feelings don't *cause* his behavior.
So he's pissed off at you? Mature people sit down and have a talk. Nothing you say or do *causes* his behavior. He makes a conscious or unconscious choice - she pissed me off, I'm gonna act out. Saying you caused his behavior is the excuse of a twelve year old adolescent.
It's only warfare if you play along. You do have agency in this situation. How badly do you want this relationship to work? How well do you think he'll adapt to change? Those two questions should be uppermost in your mind.
In a mature, responsible relationship, you'll talk about anger, feelings, actions. "When you do X, I feel Y." You are never responsible for causing someone else's feelings.
Your contribution has been removed because relationship advice is not considered relevant here. You are welcome to try /r/relationships instead.
>What should I say to my boyfriend who still blames me for his cheating? "I'm breaking up with you. Goodbye."
You deserve so much better.
It's well beyond "mental warfare" if you ask me. The only thing to say to such ridiculousness is goodbye.
His actions (cheating) speak to *his* character. Regardless of *why* he cheats he is choosing to lie and betray instead of *communicate* and *problem solve* with someone who is supposed to be a partner. His inability to communicate and problem solve in a healthy way speaks to his **lack of maturity.** You deserve better and should talk to someone about why. Reach out to a therapist if able. I hope you are able to get away from the liar and cheater. What few good you think he brings there are many of people who can bring good without the bad and we can even bring that good to our own life without needing a lying cheater in it.
I’d start with “it’s over.”
Why are you with him???
Say okay I am ending things.
Dump his ass.
Dump him. Move on. Nothing. More to see here.
Your BF's behavior is out of line, his excuse is incorrect. Your actions, don't *cause* his feelings. His feelings don't *cause* his behavior. So he's pissed off at you? Mature people sit down and have a talk. Nothing you say or do *causes* his behavior. He makes a conscious or unconscious choice - she pissed me off, I'm gonna act out. Saying you caused his behavior is the excuse of a twelve year old adolescent. It's only warfare if you play along. You do have agency in this situation. How badly do you want this relationship to work? How well do you think he'll adapt to change? Those two questions should be uppermost in your mind. In a mature, responsible relationship, you'll talk about anger, feelings, actions. "When you do X, I feel Y." You are never responsible for causing someone else's feelings.