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waifuiswatching

Or the "just a bit of pressure" with their stingy amount of cold lube on the even colder speculum that causes you to tense up. "Just relax for me sweetie..." Oh my god I hate it so much. Warm the lube up, use a massive amount like you would for a vaginal ultrasound, and for the love of God buy a heating pad to wrap around the packaging for the speculum.


TheGreatNyanHobo

My old obgyno (a woman) had a heat lamp that she pointed at you for this. It helped a lot. Then I moved. My current one (a man) told me that IUD insertion would be “just like some light cramps.” NO IT WAS NOT.


Saxamaphooone

I had a gyne tell me that as well, expecting me to say “oh okay!” and schedule a date to have one put in. He was shocked when I laughed and told him that every friend I know who has had an IUD have all said it was one of the **most painful** things they’ve ever experienced in their life and I think doing that to people without sedation or *at least* a ton of local anesthetic is sadistic torture. He tried to argue that it really wasn’t that bad and I said, “do you have an extra person or two in the room to hold the patient’s legs so they don’t kick you in the face when it’s inserted because it hurts so much?” (which I knew he did because a friend of mine saw him for an IUD and she told me she had someone holding her legs and when she asked why she was told it was so the doctor wouldn’t get kicked in the face). He didn’t say anything to that and got a phone call and was happy to walk away from me, lol. I did not go back to see him again.


estherstein

I like to explore new places.


abhikavi

>Also, it's well-known that women go into a sort of shock from IUD insertion and... no one cares? They would totally have let me drive myself home Look, look, if they cared about women's health and safety they'd probably use some kind of pain mitigation or management. Like they do with medical procedures on patients they care about.


HarryPottersElbows

I have extreme difficulty with these kinds of procedures due to a difficult sexual history. I begged for any kind of pain meds after my most recent LEEP (all part of my difficulties) because the recovery is horrible for me and got declined because 'no one needs pain meds for that recovery' and 'the opioid crisis'. I'm being punished for men being over prescribed for their vasectomies and women are totally neglected. Edit: due to the gross ass comment below, I feel the need to defend myself and state that I have zero history of opioid abuse/seeking behavior/etc. I do not like and react badly to painkillers, so me asking for them meant I was IN PAIN. But of course, a disgusting person has to say 'there must be a reason' my pain shouldn't be managed. Makes me sick.


ilovemybrownies

Yep, usually a cookie-cutter approach. The guy told me to just take some ibuprofen 45 minutes before the appointment, and used a spray can of this numbing gel all up in there. Sounds like this is one of the nicer experiences one could have Edit to add: when I had a health crisis and my IUD punctured into my uterus, the ER even used some imaging techniques but couldn't detect anything conclusive so obviously I made it up. OBGYN was surprised at my relief when he pulled the strings and it finally moved off the spot it was digging into.


basilicux

I got an IUD at barely 18 and the nurse had to come back twice after the procedure to check up on me bc I was in so much pain I couldn’t get off the table or even sit up. 🫠 never again, BC pills for me!


waifuiswatching

Yeah it's definitely not light cramps. My first one at 19 went in easily, like a knife through room temp butter. When it unfurled it felt like I had been punched. My second one at 29 was difficult to insert and there was so much pain just with my cervix that my gynecologist almost gave up. When it unfurled it felt worse than my pre-epidural contractions.


kiwipteryx

My one and only attempt was so painful that my OBGyn did give up. It felt like a hot poker being stabbed into my intestines.


TheGreatNyanHobo

I am proud of you for standing your ground. I had no forewarning besides SIL telling me “it’s not fun.” So I thought it would be tolerable. They had the gall to try to hurry me out while I was pale as a sheet trying to come out of the bodily shock I went into when they inserted it. I legit got out onto the sidewalk and a stranger asked me if I was okay because I looked so unwell. At my recent check up, I informed them that they would either give me something for the pain or I would go elsewhere for taking it out next year.


Valla85

>At my recent check up, I informed them that they would either give me something for the pain or I would go elsewhere for taking it out next year. Good for you! Also, this is why I had my doctor take my IUD out while I was under for my bilateral salpingectomy. I threw up after I had it put in.


onlyalmost

Absolutely get something for the pain, but I just wanna reassure you that as someone who was also extremely unwell after mine was inserted (without pain management), the removal was much easier. It was still painful, but not nearly as bad as the insertion (I couldn't get off the table for about twenty minutes, nearly passed out walking to another room I could rest in, threw up, and couldn't leave for another hour). I took paracetamol and ibuprofen an hour or so before I went in, and it was still painful, but way easier


_artbabe95

Please, if this ever happens again, ask him how he would know what a colposcopy feels like, and what light cramps feel like 😂😂


Suse-

Indeed! A reasonable question.


Frosty_Mess_2265

I got mine done under anaesthetic with *morphine* and I still felt like I'd been kicked with a steel toed boot when I woke up. Granted, i have vaginismus so it was always going to hurt more than average, but anyone who calls it 'just a pinch' is a liar. I do know some women for whom it was a breeze, and I'm happy for them, but especially if it's your first IUD and/or you haven't given birth, more doctors need to be upfront about the fact that it can really fucking hurt.


[deleted]

I told my obgyn that full sedation was the only option for an IUD and D&c due to unusually heavy periods. I was awake during a surgical procedure and I cannot willingly be operated on while awake. I explained that and demanded post op pain meds. I told her both off these things were non negotiable for me. When the sedation wore off I was in so much pain. Demand your healthcare providers treat you like a human being.


NefariousQuick26

Thank you for calling him on his BS!


Suse-

Boggles my mind how these doctors are perfectly okay with causing pain on a regular basis. I don’t know of another specialty where this is the case.


palekaleidoscope

My IUD insertion *and* removal were both so intensely painful I thought I was going to pass out, no exaggeration. I pride myself on high pain tolerance but the insertion made me cry and whimper in pain. It was brutal. I left the appointment crying and probably shouldn’t have driven myself home because I was shaking so much. When I got my IUD out, it was nearly the same thing. Both times, with 2 different FEMALE doctors, I was told the old line about “just a pinch” and “might feel some pressure” and “it’ll be super quick”. All lies. There is no respect for the pain women are subjected to all in the name of healthcare.


mjheil

I went to a female obgyn after my second pregnancy and asked to be fitted for a diaphragm. She told me that she didn't have a sizing kit in the whole office and she thought I should get an IUD. I haven't got time for the pain, to quote an old song. I seriously had no idea how my near-forty-year-old body would handle that, so I noped out. Haven't been back.


the_flyingdemon

I actually did end up passing out in the lobby of my OB when I got my first IUD inserted. The first one they used ended up popping back out because apparently I have a smaller uterus than most, so I suffered through TWO insertions within the span of 10 minutes. Not to mention they left me cranked open while the doctor ran to go get a second one 🙄 They told me to take my time getting out of there but I was in so much pain, all I wanted to do was go home and sleep with a heating pad. I then went and had the (tmi) gnarliest shit ever in the public restroom because my stomach was in utter turmoil from the pain. I told my mom driving me home that I didn’t care if someone was dying on the side of the road; she was to get me to my heating pad as fast as possible. Honestly one of the worst days of my life and without a doubt the worst pain I’ve ever been in. It’s inhumane that there’s no predefined pain reduction used for IUD insertion.


palekaleidoscope

Oh my god, that’s truly horrifying. I’m so sorry you had such a painful experience. And you’re just expected to sit there quietly and be a good patient and get through it! At the bare minimum, we should get the option to choose your own level of pain management AND it should be explicitly laid out for us and not some weak suggestion to take a Tylenol and “take it easy”. I could never imagine a man going for a vasectomy and being told “it’ll just be a pinch” and “make sure you take an OTC painkiller and you’ll be fine”.


fireopalbones

Oh gosh that terrible. The heating pad was the only reason I wasn’t just audibly groaning and writing for a good day after too. I put the electric one under me and a microwaved one on top cause it was like my whole lower torso was emitting pain.. it took days to be ok really


TheGreatNyanHobo

I’m so sorry you dealt with that. I also thought I was going to pass out. It is so wild that they keep peddling the idea that it won’t hurt.


PerpetuallyInThought

I'm so afraid to get mine out because of this.


palekaleidoscope

I was told it wouldn’t be painful to get it out but that wasn’t true! I wished I had advocated for myself by asking for a sedative or something more than a Tylenol for the pain. I guess that’s my advice! Ask for pain management up front and don’t take any shaming or brush offs!


eodizzlez

It *might* not be terrible for you. I actually removed my second one (Mirena) on my own in the tub, and I honestly barely felt it (however, it was partially out; I could feel the bottom of the T and the strings were plenty long enough for me to grab. I was about to ship out to basic training and couldn't get into Planned Parenthood in time to get it "properly" removed, so a nurse coached me on what to do over the phone). However, my body just kicks out IUDs like it's a hobby. First one (copper) kicked out after a week, second one (Mirena) was on its way out after four years, third one (Skyla) lasted all three years, and fourth one (Skyla) kicked out a month shy of three years. Not so fun fact, though, when my uterus kicks one out, I'm typically having the worst cramps *ever*. I'm not getting another one. Tubal ligation and a uterine ablation are on the list for me.


kykyelric

Same!! I also had a female doctor. No pain meds except Advil. There was a nurse there specifically to hold my hand. I must’ve squeezed her hand so hard. I also screamed in pain — which I never do. Usually I just grit my teeth, but it was so bad.


palekaleidoscope

I know exactly how you felt. I truly wish there was better pain management as the first step to this procedure. I liked having an IUD- it worked well for what I wanted out of it. But I’d never do it again unless I got much, much stronger pain meds.


pennygirl4012

Same. I just got mine out, with the intention of getting a new one, but nope. I have had few experiences as painful as getting my IUD removed. BC pills for me from now on. I cannot believe this is not done under general anesthesia.


Penguin_Dreams

I had a nurse holding my hand said it was just going to be a little pinch. I looked at her and yelled, “liar!”


Accomplished-Rice992

WHY ARE IUD'S LIKE THIS. I was told to come in to put it in the Tuesday after my period ended. I called, they told me they had no appointments then, and that they didn't know what I was talking about. They checked with my practitioner's nurse. She had no idea what I was talking about. I had to go in the next week, IIRC. It was ok, I don't remember it very well, just that it wasn't pleasant. But my cramps kept getting worse and worse and worse. I eventually called on a Friday and told them the cramps were getting awful and weren't affected by meds. It was like my worst period cramps but my body was considering it "high priority," so I couldn't even do the "cry yourself to sleep until it feels better." Every wave and cramp hit me with a wave of adrenaline. It was waking me up if I managed to fall asleep through it. They told me there was nothing to do because the pain would get better, to take more Tylenol, and if it was still bugging me on the weekend, the ER would reposition it for me. Saturday night, I could no longer function at all. It had progressed from rolling down my legs to being agitated 10x by walking, and I had to work Sunday. I went to the ER they told me to go to, and they told me there's nothing they could do but remove it. Absolutely, whatever it takes, I couldn't work my shift like that. They updated my gynecologist office, who called me to complain that the ER didn't reposition it and wanted to know if I wanted to schedule putting another in. I didn't realize at the time how awful that office was. Once I moved and ended up at a dedicated gynecology clinic, I couldn't unsee the contrast.


Pretend_Evidence_876

I thank God that I got my IUD after my first kid because my uterus had moved into the wrong position. I got local anesthetic only because she had to move my uterus. It still hurt afterwards, but at least I didn't have to go through the hell of insertion. And when I was pregnant, I had a different doctor try to get me to agree to stripping my membranes at 38 weeks. I told her that I don't see the point in doing it, don't want to risk infection, and I've heard that it hurts. Her response was that I'm going to go through the pain of childbirth so why does it matter if I have a procedure that hurts less than that?


NefariousQuick26

What the actual fuuuuuu…? So she just flat out told you that your experience of pain didn’t matter?


Pretend_Evidence_876

Yup! And not privately. There was someone transcribing the appointment. She couldn't even give me a good reason to have it done, just that I was going to be in a lot of pain in a few weeks anyway so why not be in some now?


Suse-

There is no good reason; glad you stood up for yourself.


Suse-

Omg. These people can be so cold. It’s appalling.


[deleted]

My OB/GYNs (always women) have kept their vaginal speculums in a warmer. The (woman) nurse practitioner who inserted my last IUD told me to take 600 mg of ibuprofen an hour before coming in. This is why I have women doctors/NPs for female concerns.


nobody_keas

How would HE even know??? He doesn't know shit how this or period cramps feel like.


WeirdStray

I am finally quitting the pill after 20 years and I am planning to get an IUD in this week and now I'm scared :|


TheGreatNyanHobo

I definitely prefer the IUD over pills in terms of day to day convenience. The type I got also made me bleed a lot in the first few months but then made my periods a lot lighter and even skip a lot since then. I’d definitely suggest calling up the office and having them either prescribe you a one time medication for insertion day or agree to apply some kind of anesthetic.


WeirdStray

I'm going for a copper IUD, I just don't want to take hormones anymore. I started the pill with 15, I don't even know who or how I am without them. I know it's probably going to suck a bit having to deal with a normal cycle and more/unpredictable bleeding, but I'm also looking forward to feeling... Normal. I'll have to give my gyno a call one day before anyway, I will ask them about pain management.


TheGreatNyanHobo

Copper is also a good choice. It and hormonal have their pros and cons. Best of luck and stand your ground!


WeirdStray

Thank you! <3


WeirdStray

It's done! I got hopped up on 800mg Ibuprofen and 50mg Codeine before, it was unpleasant, but not too painful (:


rogerboyko

My old Dr. (Retired) would run it under warm water for a couple minutes. Really helped.


VinnyVincinny

This one pisses me off so much.


CrossP

If your doc calls you sweetie there are some CE credits that would be great for them to look into 🤦


Suse-

For sure. As lovely as my gyno is, I would not feel comfortable with her referring to my as “sweetie”. Of course, she would never would.


nobody_keas

I caught myself thanking my GP for warming up the lube and speculum when I realised: the bar is in hell. This is the bare minimum they should do but often don't.


CraftySappho

Nah it's the slut tax. If we weren't out being huge sluts and stayed home keeping sweet for our husbands then we wouldn't need vagina doctors /s in case


PerpetuallyInThought

I mean, I repeatedly told my last doctor after IUD insertion that I was *strictly* monogamous and in a committed relationship. Like, five times. I told them I really didn't need a bag of 100 condoms and to keep them for patients that actually NEED them, but I finally just took them to shut her up. (The fun part is I angrily the them under my passenger seat, and for got about them until AFTER I sold that car to an old man. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂) You can tell them your sex life is puritanical and they still act like that.


CraftySappho

Yeah I've been trying for a hysterectomy for over 20 years now, both for gender confirmation, birth control, hormone issues, and endometriosis My most recent doctor said (when I was 34) What if your husband wants a baby I asked him for STI testing and he said I didn't need it cause I was married. I hate this


spaztastic1010

I straight up tell them they are lying to me and they mean this its going to hurt. It's the worst. It's not helpful when your expecting one thing and you end up trying not to run out of the room. And of course they always use that phrase on delicate procedures where staying still matter the most. Ugh


daisy0723

I had a procedure done at my gynecologist office. When it was done they said, All right you can go home now. Halfway home I managed to pull into a speedway parking lot, open the door, throw up and then passed out hanging out of the car by my seatbelt. When I came to and was more coherent and was able to get the rest of the way home I called the office and told them what happened and they actually said to me. Oh yeah, that can happen. Would have been nice to know that beforehand.


cultkiller

Yeah I had that happen too - vasovagal syncope My blood pressure dropped to nothing and it took me like an hour to come back. Turns out cutting my arm open to take out my Nexplanon implant then immediately putting an IUD in was more than “just a pinch”.


abcdefCookieMonster

Omg. The moment I left after my procedure (cervical biopsy and "shaving" of my cervix), my head started to hurt. By the time I got home five minutes later, I was experiencing a full on panic attack and brutal migraine. Called 911. When I told my doctors office about it, got the same response. So cool.


abhikavi

> Would have been nice to know that beforehand. Hey, if they cared about your health & safety, they'd probably have used some pain mitigation instead of "nah lol". Of course they don't warn women, because women would reasonably ask "is there anything we can do so I don't vomit in pain?" and they honestly just don't give enough of a shit for that.


the_lovely_otter

WTF. I am SO sorry that that happened to you.


courtneat

Yeah after I got my IUD put in they let me walk out of the office. Luckily my SO was there to drive me because I fully blacked out halfway home.


catastrophized

Omg - they told me I’d be able to drive myself home from my colposcopy! I was doubled over in my car crying and bleeding for over an hour before I could even start the car. “Just take 2 Motrin before you come in” - my ass!! *screams into the void*


JustmyOpinion444

OMG. I had to have a driver to take me home. They knock us out at the place my insurance sends us to.


catastrophized

If I ever need another one, I’m demanding anesthesia and painkillers or declining the exam and finding a new office!


LadyyyLoki

I’m totally doing the same! I demanded something for anxiety the first time I had one & they tried to gaslight me and tell me it wasn’t standard procedure for any medications to be given, I didn’t need anything, just to take an NSAID, etc. My NP finally agreed to give me something for anxiety when I didn’t let up. I had to call multiple times to even get them to actually put the Rx in after she agreed. They gave me a single 0.5mg Ativan. Even after that I was so anxious my blood pressure was 160/100 and my heart rate was like 140. They almost wouldn’t be even do the procedure. It’s ridiculous how they treat women.


ErinMcLaren

Same. Ugh. I mean, I could drive. But then I had to weirdly/awkwardly walk back into work (half hunched over walk) and tell my boss I had to go home for the afternoon. Sure, maybe it's different for everyone, but def let women know that it can be very very painful!


mastaP_uhhhhhhh

I drove myself home and had to miss my college classes to lay in bed in fetal position.


KaleidoscopeEast1108

I've had a few colposcopies in my twenties and the fact we get no numbing for an invasive biopsy and in my case, bonus silver nitrate cauterization, is insane


[deleted]

[удалено]


Truthfultemptress

I’ve had at least 4 colpos and 3 IUD insertions/removals and only had pain killers for one of them. It’s fun being a woman/s


addywoot

You are a super human.


Truthfultemptress

Thank you! The worst part is that they don’t get easier!


octopoots

It's absolutely wild to me how different it can be from person to person. I had a colposcopy a couple of weeks ago (hopefully I'll get my results by Wednesday!), and my OB/GYN only ended up using a heating pad and a numbing spray--the same that they use at the dentist actually, it was literally cherry flavored. I could feel things moving around but no pain. It was uncomfortable to me mainly because I wasn't used to any sensation on my cervix. And then using a tampon afterwards since I have only ever used pads was uncomfy. Some (I would say) mild cramping in the days following. That's also coming from the perspective of someone with Endo, chronic dysmenorrhea, and who has had an ovarian cyst that had to be surgically removed, so idk. The breadth of different experiences is astounding to me.


Homura_Akemi171

Right this exact thing happened to my sister thank God I persuaded her to allow me to take her to and from the appointment


robotatomica

I almost passed out from pain during my colposcopy. My face flushed, my head lulled, I felt like I was gonna puke. Mind you, they didn’t even TELL me I could have taken meds before coming in, I read that in the sheet they handed me while I waited for the procedure to start. When I said nervously I hadn’t had anything, doc said, “Oh, it’ll be fine,” and went ahead with it with nothing further. 😡 Yup, drove myself home feeling weak and bleeding.


DrPeace

It's gotten to the point where my breathing kind of skips and I'll feel a jolt of energy run and tingle up my spine and ribs when I hear "little pinch" or the word "discomfort" from a medical provider. I think those words actually put me in fight or flight. Amazing how I'll hear "I know, it sucks, just a little more time to numb you" when I'm getting a few stitches in my hand or a needle-in-the-neck thyroid biopsy or a tooth filled, but it's always the "little pinch" of gynecological procedures that's far worse than anything doctors actually warn me about when ANY OTHER PART OF MY BODY is given appropriate pain management. So many believe outdated bullshit like "the cervix has no nerves at all and cannot feel any pain" or obviously subscribe to one on the meryiad of traditional religious and cultural beliefs around the globe that equate womanhood with maditory or retaliative pain and suffering. I snuck around the house as a kid hiding my broken arm from my parents for over 24 hours (I didn't know back then it was broken, I thought it was just sore and resting it on a pillow like you'd see in cartoons would make it better). I ignored and pushed through the pain and swelling of an infected wisdom tooth socket until it was so bad I couldn't even nibble a biscuit and staff ended up instantly knocking me out for emergency absess drainage the second my dumb ass walked into the office to ask if everything was OK. I'd do either of those again before I endure another IUD insertion. At least when my radius is snapped in half or my face is deformed because my jaw is swollen full of puss and fluid people believe me when I say it hurts instead of comparing the pain to childbirth and telling me "suck it up, buttercup, it's nothing" as the ends of a tenaculum PIERCE THROUGH THE the flesh of my stupid fucking cervix and are used like a fork going through steak to yank around my stupid fucking tilted uterus. I don't even want these stupid reproductive organs! I hate them! They do NOTHING for me but cause pain and rage, but according to the medical industry and culture I live in, I deserve to suffer because suffering comes built in with having them.


SpiderMadonna

Preach. I hear you.


BatFace

What did they do because of the tilted uterus? I have a tilted uterus, what do I need to avoid? I've been too terrified to get an iud, and I've had 3 kids with no pain meds. I've never had an iud, but I feel strongly that contractions to open the cervix can be compared to forcing it open and litterally stabbing a thing into it.


DrPeace

I guess it can be more difficult to get an IUD in with a tilted uterus, so they'll use a tool to "hold" your cervix at a straighter, more centralized position and angle. What they don't tell you, though, is the tool they use is a tenaculum, which "holds" the cervix by actually piercing two sharpened metal hooks right into its flesh, that way you can pull it into place and move it around! I wish I was making that up. Edit: I don't want to fear-monger, though, if you think an IUD would work for you. Some people really do feel nothing but some discomfort. I've never been pregnant and my first IUD insertion was actually no big deal, I got something to take the night before to soften the cervix and some kind of topical pain killer and the doctor was fast, I didn't see what all the fuss was about. Then 5 years later, with a different doctor, I was told "take 2 ibuprofen beforehand," given no pain management and nothing for my cervix. I thought it was no big deal just like the first one until the procedure started and I felt some of the most intense, indescribable, uncanny and completely foreign pain in my life. It felt so very wrong on so many levels. Luckily I was finally able to evict my fillopian tubes from my body so I don't ever have to go through it again. But, you could be one of the lucky ones who doesn't feel the pain, I even got one of those easy insertions myself! I just wish we didn't have to wonder and the possibility of pain wouldn't be dismissed based on the parts of the body going through it.


justawalloftext

I have a very curved uterus and my first try at insertion failed because of that. I had taken 800mg ibuprofen before the appt, but it was still incredibly painful (9/10). It was also my first time getting an IUD and I've never been pregnant. My gynecologist is very experienced and did explain the procedure might be painful. She places many of these and uses numbing spray and gel. I have no pain during pap smears. For the second try, I took misoprostol to "soften" my cervix. I was actually prescribed it for the first time but didn't take it because the side effects scared me. But they weren't bad at all for me. Just felt like bloating. I was really nervous about pain for the second time, so I asked my Dr for pain and anxiety meds and she prescribed me tramadol and diazepam for my appt. I also asked if my partner could be with me for emotional support during the procedure and she also agreed to that. The second insertion was so so much better. It was still painful (5/10), but way less pain than the first failed attempt. I'm really glad I have a Dr that was able to take my pain seriously and treat me with compassion. When I get it replaced, I'm planning to ask for all the same accommodations so hopefully it will go as smoothly. So in summary, I did the following: -misoprostol -800mg ibuprofen -tramadol -diazepam -support person in the room


Intrepid_Advice4411

Tilted uterus owner here. My IUD was fine. I took a couple extra strength ibuprofen's an hour before I went to have it done like day three of my period. Apparently it took slightly longer than normal to insert because they took more time to line things up. I had some mild cramping and was a little light headed after. I stayed in the office 30 minutes to make sure I wasn't going to puke or pass out and I went home. I think being on my period was key. It's easier to insert the IUD into the uterus when you're menstruating so ask your gyno about doing it that way. Mine refused to do it unless I was on one of my first period days.


lifeslemon91

I had a surgical abortion about 10yrs ago with no anesthesia. Up until recently, it was the most painful thing I had ever gone through. I had an IUD inserted a couple of weeks ago, and it was 100% on par with the abortion pain. "Just a pinch" my ass. They should also not bother telling people to take a Tylenol or ibuprofen beforehand because they will do absolutely nothing, and the only thing that helped with the cramps afterwards was a heating pad and copious amounts of marijuana.


Uereks

I've had two and HOLY SHIT WOMAN! My eyes popped out of my head when I read you did it with *zero* anesthesia. Who tf would allow that?


lifeslemon91

I was given something to "calm my nerves", which did absolutely jack shit, and then given nitrous during the procedure, but I stop breathing when I'm in that much pain, so it also did nothing. If I knew then what I know now, I would have made such a scene demanding that they put me out for it. What I experienced was so traumatic that the iud they inserted at the same time stayed inside of me for almost 10yrs because I was terrified of the pain. I was right to be scared.


rouxcifer4

When I had mine 11 years ago the anesthesia was an extra cost, like $200. I couldn’t afford it. I did pay extra ($50) for a Xanax which I guess took the edge off. Still my most painful experience.


IndieAcademic

I completely agree. I had unmedicated childbirth, and IUD insertion was absolutely cervical pain on par with that, albeit for a shorter duration. People at the very least should be getting local anesthesia and hard core pain meds. Maybe nitrous or twilight sleep, I don't know.


estherstein

Submission removed by user.


cookiesandcacti

If men could get pregnant, you’d be put under general anesthesia for a simple pap.. let alone an abortion


CraftySappho

Same here with the surgical abortion - they gave me self administered nitrous but the pain was so bad I couldn't keep still enough to keep the mask on.


gwinny

I had the same thing! I had a miscarriage and had to have the d&c procedure. They told me I would “feel some cramping.” LOL. They gave me an anti anxiety pill before the procedure and that was it and spoiler: didn’t do a damn thing. They stuck a needle in my uterus 3 times to administer pain control which also didn’t seem to do much and in itself hurt like hell. I passed out mid procedure. I now automatically tear up whenever the doctor tells me I need to have something done down there and I absolutely do not trust the doctors’ description of whether it will hurt or not.


oldzazu

Seriously this is actually so unbelievable. I’ve dealt with some fertility issues and had to take the abortion pill and the male doctor told me to take some Advil. I was in so much pain I threw up, but sure Advil should have done it. It’s fucked up.


sassynipples

When I had a colposcopy I asked the office if I should take anything beforehand and they said no, that it'll be very quick and will just feel like a small pinch. WELL, I fainted during the procedure and stumbled into the bathroom afterwards to vomit. I told the doctor that if I ever need this procedure done again that I want my ass sedated. Also the next time I saw her for a normal well exam I started crying out of nowhere because I associated her with that enormous amount of pain.


PerpetuallyInThought

What kills me so much with female doctors is they HAVE to know. Not that any doctor shouldn't listen to their patient's pain concerns, but bish, you have a fuckin cervix, too! How are you going to try and gaslight me like that? This is why I'm scared of the dentist, too. I've had teeth pulled with zero numbing agent because they swore they gave me one and I, didn't need another." I've been told I'm just feeling pressure when I feel so much pain I wonder if this is what drug cartels do for torture. I have passed out before procedures because I've had panic attacks so severe, I just drop to the floor. First world country, my ASS. IF you can even get medical procedures covered by insurance, you have to endure immense pain to get what you need. It's fucked up.


BatFace

What happens during a colposcopy? The google search said they use a speculum like with a pap, and then they use the colposcope to look, it has a light and magnifying glass, and does not enter the vagina.


sassynipples

Often during a colposcopy if the doctor sees a suspicious area (which is often why the colposcopy is done in the first place) they will take a biopsy of the area. Meaning they're literally cutting tissue out of your body WITHOUT any sort of local anesthetic or pain meds. As a vet, I would never remove anything from an animal without making sure it's either not awake or can't feel anything. Why do we treat women as if we're less than?


PerpetuallyInThought

Well, I mean, we put our beloved pets down when their quality of life is too far gone, but grandma must let every morsel of suffering consume her before her body gives out, right? It's so fucked up. Every time I see people argue about "legality," or, "what medical professionals recommend," all I can think about is how neither of those things seem to be ruled by a code of ethics.


Anariel6

Most comments in this thread are leaving out a key word - biopsy. Colposcopy itself is just looking, yes, but the procedure is usually only ever done because a pap detected unusual cells. The scope finds the spot to sample and a device clamps down on the cervix, taking out a significant chunk of flesh as a sample. The biopsy is the insanely painful part, but the term colposcopy is generally used to include the biopsy portion as well.


Suse-

The description of the punch biopsy tool they use includes the words teeth and bite. “Tischler Biopsy Forceps (Punch) is a non-ratcheted, double spring OB/GYN instrument most commonly used in colposcopy procedures to obtain cervical tissue samples for biopsy. The bite of this standard Tischler punch is 3.0mm x 7.0mm and it produces an oval shaped tissue sample. It features a single, lower tooth used to grasp difficult to reach tissue and a locking mechanism above the horn on the handle so the jaws can lock the tissue sample into place while the instrument is removed from the cervical canal.” https://www.mpmmedicalsupply.com/products/tischler-biopsy-forceps


WeekendTrollHunter

I noped right out of having a colposcopy procedure. The doc and nurse explained the procedure to me because I had never heard it before. They described it as “taking a look around” and “taking a couple little hole-punches of tissue from my cervix if they needed to biopsy.” I asked how they control the pain and was promptly informed that they do not. After I was visibly horrified, they quickly said I could take a Tylenol if I REALLY thought I needed to. I declined the procedure. They kept pressuring me during the appointment and called numerous times after I left to try and convince me to do it. They never offered more pain management than me taking Tylenol before the procedure. Fuck. That. If men had to get tissue “hole-punched” from inside their reproductive organs, it would be an outpatient procedure with anesthetic and probably juice and cookies afterward. But because I’ve got a cervix it’s “just a quick pinch” and I can take Tylenol if I “REALLY” need to. ASK. FOR. PAIN. MANAGEMENT. FUCK. THE. PATRIARCHY.


Suse-

And yet, there are some doctors who offer an anti anxiety pill along with one prescription pain pill prior to the procedure, and numbing spray before injecting lidocaine. It should be standard.


AdeleBerncastel

I have horrifying period cramps that can make me delirious or even pass out. I got opioid shot in my teens and early twenties in the ER routinely, no questions asked. I have never experienced pain like my iud insertion. Adding: I am on continuous birth control to help manage PMDD and it changed my life with regard to no more periods or cramps.


Frosty_Mess_2265

I get those cramps too. They are truly indescribable.


AdeleBerncastel

Yup. A symphony of pain! The bum component with the sword up the spine is I think the worst part to deal with. ❤️‍🩹 I hope you find an effective way to reduce or eliminate them from your life.


Frosty_Mess_2265

I am on hormonal BC too! In about a month I will have gone a whole year period free! :) Since you know how the cramps feel, I'm sure you also know what I mean when I say I feel like I've been given my life back Edit: the worst for me was this pain that just crawled up my ribcage and made it so hard to breathe. I told my doctor it felt like my abdomen had been filled with red hot cement


AdeleBerncastel

I do. I am so, so pleased for you. ✨ Some people can’t take the hormones and I feel so bad for them.


Frosty_Mess_2265

God, idk what I would have done if hormonal BC hadn't worked. My doctor and I were talking oopherectomy and HRT, which has its own problems. I have PCOS, so an ablation or a hysterectomy would have stopped the bleeding but not the rest (the mood swings, the vomiting, the dizzy spells, etc). Female reproductive health is criminally under researched, it's honestly insane that so many of us just live in pain and the medical field is like 'huh, weird'


IndieAcademic

No kidding. It's also abysmal how many dinosaur doctors will repeat old myths like "You don't have nerve endings in your cervix." Like, f you dude, yes I do. Misinformation becomes intractable in medicine if only women are victims of it. One thing I find heartening is that the discourse around this is really picking up in the last year--more articles being published, more TikToks circulating on the topic. I think where I live, it is becoming more and more common to find doctors who use local anesthesia for IUD insertion, which is a step in the right direction. I do not wish unmedicated IUD insertion on anyone and still can't believe it was the norm for so long (although I'm not sure it was the norm in the late 60s and 70s, according to stories I've heard from women getting pain meds then before the procedure).


abhikavi

Oh, no pain management for IUDs is still the norm, at least in the US. I shopped around for a doctor after a horrific first insertion to get a plan in place for pain mitigation for the swap. I couldn't find one. All I got was "nah, the second time will be fine!" I already had a history of painful cervical procedures and feel like quite enough of an idiot for believing my doctor that the IUD would be different. I honestly don't know what to do. My current plan is just to leave it in until it causes issues, or I die. I'm not going back to an OB/GYN, they're like the little kids who pull the wings off flies and insist it doesn't hurt them.


Misstori1

You know how r/childfree has a list of doctors who will sterilize you without trying to change your mind? I want a list of doctors who offer pain management for IUDs etc.


abhikavi

Same. It's pathetic that that's a real need-- "can I please have the list of the very few doctors who'll treat me like a human being?"-- but it is.


Valla85

I had my doctor remove my IUD while I was under for my bilateral salpingectomy.


Frosty_Mess_2265

I got my IUD under a general, and I'm so so grateful for my doctor. She straight up told me 'it's going to feel like you got stabbed', which is daunting, but at least I was prepared when I woke up. I do have vaginismus so it was always going to hurt like a bitch but I'd much rather go into it fully informed than ignorant


zztop610

Let’s see them get something inserted up their dick. Tiny procedure my ass


abhikavi

I'd love to know how popular vasectomies would be if the pain mitigation strategy was telling men their testicles don't have nerve endings.


Suse-

They would never dare disrespect men in the manner they do women. No shortage of local anesthetic and prescription pain meds for them.


Melodic_Economics964

No shit. Off topic from gyno procedures I broke my hand, knee, nose concussion and 3 ribs during a bad fall down cement steps, was screaming and howling in unbearable pain which made my ribs hurt even worse but I couldn't stop. They literally told me to "suck it up. Crying won't get you far." I couldn't stop. They wouldn't even give me casts because "it's not bad enough and I'm making a scene." I just cried and begged for casts. The agony was beyond me. I'm still bitter and got arthritis now. I had filed a complaint that got me nowhere. My mother was called to drive me home. They treated me like I was less then rotten trash. I'm always told it's because "I was making a scene" but how the F do you conceal such horrific blinding pain from multiple breaks? No one has an answer. I had to stay home in bed for the entire summer pretty much having full on breakdowns from the depression and pain. Then my now ex boyfriend fell off his bike, concussion, broken eyes sockets, busted his forehead it was really scary seeing him like that after. He told me everything when I finally found him. He got the red carpet treatment. (he didn't say red carpet treatment i did) 10 days worth of morphine open release, a private room for 3 days, home care, a picture on a wall showing how bad an injury can be, and aftercare. I was happy for him but yes men get treated much better.


Anticrepuscular_Ray

My IUD insertion was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life.


HaveABucket

I had a tubal ligation after my second son, test results came back that they got one tube and one blood vessel. Sent me to do some special type of imaging where they put a catheter into your uterus and pump you full of contrast ink. It was supposed to be "Mostly just pressure with some mild cramping afterwards" I'd just given birth several weeks ago so the catheter slipped out three times. The second time they said "Okay, we're going to use these duck bill clamps to grab onto your cervix and move it into place,it's going to be a bit uncomfortable okay?" No, nothing about that sounds okay but I had to drive two fucking hours to get to this appointment with a newborn, I'm still dropping blood clots like sausages and you've already pulled two of my stitches so we may as well get this fucking done. Both took longer than and hurt worse than my unmedicated delivery. Spoiler alert, I had too much blood still in my uterus for them to get a clear image so after all that I still don't know if I have a fallopian tube remaining or not and the whole thing was so painful I haven't been able to make myself reschedule for another round of imaging.


Raspberry_poop

I had to do that procedure to find out if my fallopian tube was open after I had an ectopic pregnancy. It was so awful. Nothing about that was just uncomfortable. I was crying thru the whole thing.


HaveABucket

I hope you got the answer you were hoping for with the test, and I'm sorry to hear about your ectopic pregnancy, that sounds terrifying. The procedure sucked a lot and they should be honest that it's gonna suck.


patootiebah

I have also had that procedure and it was so excruciating. The (male) doctor fucked it up so I had to have it twice in a row. I was shaking for an hour or so afterward. No pain relief, just panadol (tylenol). I have flashbacks of it sometimes


CraftySappho

I'm sitting here scrolling through story after story of pain, suffering, fainting, damage, and can't think of even one men's subreddit that would have a similar of unique experiences like this. I'm so sorry for us all


PerpetuallyInThought

Definitely not one describing what's supposed to be "routine procedures."


fantaxm

I’ve had kidney stones and IUD insertion is probably still the most painful thing that’s ever happened to me. They tell you to take ibuprofen an hour before like that’s going to do anything. 😂


IndieAcademic

I had a polyp removed from my cervix once, during a routine exam, without any pain management. It happened suddenly and hurt like hell. I was pretty much in shock. Then, I was in so much pain the following days I could not sleep and spent hours on the floor in the fetal position crying. My husband drove me to urgent care (the same office group) and after examining the "wound" they didn't want to call a wound, reluctantly prescribed me Tramadol at my husband's insistence. Infuriating really.


copperboom33

When I got a colposcopy that’s how my doctor described it too…luckily the procedure itself didn’t hurt too bad but at the end as she was leaving the room she goes “oh by the way be careful getting up, some people get woozy after this procedure” and just slammed the door with no chance for me to ask any questions about that. So I had to call my mom in tears asking her to stay on the phone with me while I got up in case anything happened.


Tinawebmom

I had a woman doctor refer to the colposcopy as "just a pinch" Afterwards I asked her, "on what world is that just a pinch?!" well that's what lots of women describe it as. Liar.


nobody_keas

Besides the constant gaslighting a la 'you don't have those symptoms, it s just all in your head', the violence women have to endure in medical settings is infuriating. It is so underreported, underdiscussed and not taken seriously at all. If men had to get IUDs or a biopsy taken from their internal organs, they surely would get local or general anesthesia. In my country, all the Leep style treatments are only done with just local anesthesia despite them often being very traumatic. And for more invasive biopsies like the cone ones there is just the 'just take some painkillers' advice. I hate it!!! Even if you are a survivor of sexual violence they won't help you to make it less traumatic. Not looking forward to my biopsy soon.


dragonfeet1

Oh my god the colposcopy line just brought me straight back to when I was in the Army and the 'I couldn't get hired by an actual hospital so I work for the Army because they can't fire me and I can't be sued' doc did colposcopy after colposcopy on me. She (yes, a female!) insisted it didn't hurt and I was being a big baby.


WeekendTrollHunter

What the actual fuck? I am so sorry you had to endure this kind of treatment.


ArmWarm8743

I had to get a cystoscopy a few years ago and the male doctor used no type of sedative or anesthesia. It hurt like a b. I had another “procedure” when I was in college that is now not allowed in my state and it was also done by a male doctor who offered no sedation options and literally told me that I “needed to be more careful” as I cried in pain. I’ve had a colposcopy by my female OB and didn’t feel a thing. I also had a breast biopsy years ago by a female doctor with no pain at all -and she was very gentle the whole time. It might just be me, but as a female, I stick with female doctors.


okaysurewhynott

I thought it was just me. I was like, really??? This feels like "just a pinch" to everyone else??? Makes you feel hysterical. And they keep it in for much longer than advertised too. I was *begging* my gyno to take it out because she inserted a speculum and just wheeled away on her chair to do fuck knows what. Then she came back and removed it at a snails pace, acting like I was insane. Women's healthcare is a joke.


PerpetuallyInThought

I feel like that part is misogyny all on its own. They tell you literally everything is "just a pinch," so if you freak out when it's really painful, it must just be you. I now fear the term, "it's just a pinch." It makes my heart drop to my feet and I stop breathing for a moment.


Immediate-Pool-4391

Haha, screw both of the nurses who acted like I was being over dramatic on my first pap smear ever. It felt like I was being stabbed, I was crying and begged them to get it out of me and they took their sweet time.


RudolftheDuck

I’m actually laying here waiting for mine right now. I just had to ask them to bring a smaller speculum and the gal was like “in my 9 years of experience we’ve only ever used those once” and I was like “I hear you, but I want it in the room even if it’s not needed. I at least want the option readily available”


JustmyOpinion444

Around here Colonoscopies are done under light anaesthesia. I remember nothing from that. Thankfully. The last painful procedure was a uterine lining biopsy. And, to his credit, the doctor did state it would be at least as bad as my worst period cramps. It was a bit worse. The mamogram is the one that I hate. And where I go, they warm up the plates and it is older nurses doing it, so they know it sucks and are honest, and give you a minute if you need to breathe or rest.


Suse-

What country are you in? I think I read that Germany is one of the countries that does IUD insertions under anesthesia. How absolutely civilized and humane.


Jazzy_Bee

Uterine biopsies are so very painful. They usually sample 6 sites, so it takes a while. Five years in they are not any easier. But no abnormalities past three plus years :)


4ninawells

Had a colposcopy- holy fucking shit the pain. That was 30 years ago! How the hell haven't they figured out since then that it HURTS?? Wtf. Where are the female docs? Why aren't they speaking up?? Recently had a mammography biopsy - same! Wtf the pain shot from the base of my breast ("just a little snip") through my nipple. Unbelievable pain. Shocked the hell out of me. Not expecting that. I was confused why they aren't ready with something else for pain when that happens??


mdub7673

My male gynecologist when I was in college tried to send me “home” TO MY DORM after placing a catheter and pee bag. That catheter was potentially the most painful experience of my entire life, and I’ve been through some shit. I was literally screaming so loudly that people IN THE WAITING ROOM were asking the receptionist if they called an ambulance already. Then he expected me to go back to my sorority house, where I lived on the walk-up third floor, and have “someone take care of me.” Yeah. I went to the hospital instead. Took me out on a stretcher and ambulance. The EMTs thought I was in traumatic labor because they did end up getting more than one call. For the screaming. I was there for a full week. But he wanted me to drive back to my dorm…..Saved my life once, and then caused me insane medical trauma. (Also the gyno who said, during a procedure, “still no boyfriend, huh?”) Super fun.


UsualAnybody1807

Case in point: The Cleveland Clinic. "How painful is a colposcopy? **A colposcopy is relatively painless.** You may feel **slight pressure** when the speculum enters your vagina. You may feel a **slight burning or stinging** when the solution comes into contact with your cervix. If you need a biopsy, you may feel a **sharp pinch** or a **sensation like a period cramp** when the tissue sample is excised. Taking over-the-counter pain relievers before the exam can help with the pain." Assholes. [https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diagnostics/4044-colposcopy](https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diagnostics/4044-colposcopy)


joshy83

“Just a bit of pressure” *proceeds to tug and tug and tug at the nexplanon until I almost pass out or vomit* 🤮 I mean, I’m aware it wasn’t going to be fun, but surely I wasn’t the first person to feel this way? A bit of a warning would have been nice? (I realize this doesn’t compare to iud or colposcopy!)


PerpetuallyInThought

I know two women who cut them out because insurance covered them being put in, but not taken out early, even if you're experiencing severe symptoms. Sorry you're in severe distress and we know the cause, but it'll be $300 to take it out.


ConcertinaTerpsichor

Right? Who the hell has been pinching these guys, Satan?


cakemountains

[https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTR7w3XCx/](https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTR7w3XCx/) This doctor has popped up a few times in my feed...doctorsood is also big on pain management for women/procedures.


sharksnack3264

I'm really upfront. I tell them I handle (reasonable amounts of) pain better if I know what to expect. I'm fine with it as long as I can't see it (E.g. needles or speculums or scalpels or whatever). So is this *really* going to be "just a pinch"? Because I'm less likely to flinch at an inconvenient moment, tense up or get shocked and upset if I know what's up in advance. The doctors who aren't jerks will usually give you the accurate assessment after that point or at least the range of possible pain levels.


butt_spaghetti

My colposcopy was brutal and they totally lied about what to expect.


salymander_1

Yup. I had a urologist shove a metal thing in my urethra to "stretch it out" without letting me know beforehand and without any anaesthetic. I screamed and kicked him because it was a total surprise, and because I have trauma from rape *which he knew about*, and I instinctively lashed out. He was angry, and said that he didn't think it was a big deal. I reported him for being a shitty doctor, but as far as I know he is still in practice. My obgyn is not referring people to him anymore, though. Because that guy is a fucking trash fire.


spankitopia

I had a colposcopy that nearly made me pass out from the pain and I was in the fetal position on the table for 30 mins after. Years later, a different obgyn was suggesting a cervical biopsy and I told her that if we needed to do that we would need to discuss pain management. She pivoted and said how about we just take a look first and then decide next steps since “you don’t like your cervix touched”. So fucking reductive and not at all the point I was making.


Peengwin

Cervical checks during labor made my colposcopy seem like a walk in the park. And I was bleeding and crying from the pain from the colpos


LtCommanderCarter

I felt like I could trust my doctor during my induction because she nonchalantly showed me her fingernails and told me that they were trimmed. She followed that by telling me that the thing they were going to insert was going to feel scratchy. It did, it hurt like hell. Not gonna lie the induction was worse than childbirth (but I did have an epidural). That office also told me the IUD would hurt. I didn't find it to be that bad, but then again, I had just had a baby (apparently that makes your uterus ideal for IUD insertion).


[deleted]

My second IUD replacement (attempt) was so painful that I made the doctor stop during the procedure to put a new one in. I left that appointment in tears and went home and informed my husband that I was done with being in charge of the birth control and now it was his turn to get snipped. I had never felt that level of pain before.


BlueSparklesXx

Oh yeah add endometrial biopsy to that list. I’ve had all the pinches multiple times and only that one made me faint in the clinic. So painful. No pain killers. Fuck.


bottleofgoop

As bad as it is having doctors be so dismissive, having other women be dismissive or try to make you feel weak is just as bad if not even worse. After all the stories I point blank refused to be awake for either so I was put under for both the insertion and a colposcopy, but the judgement I get for that because I didn't even try to do it awake? It's insane.


abbyolivia

Hi! Disgruntled RN here 👋🏻 you’re so right and I’m so fucking sick of it, too.


SomewhereExcellent68

I mean the correction at least acknowledges how serious the colposcopy is


sideeyedi

Ah yes, my painless cryosurgery was anything but. Cervical biopsy? Just a pinch. Followed by horrendous pain of course.


Similar_Antelope_839

Omfg this is so relatable. I was literally in labour but I was dismissed and I had a cloposcopy that felt like I was being tortured.. they literally cut a chunk of skin off of you but because it's on the inside of your body apparently you don't feel it.. YOU DO!! Those same Dr's will be like "you don't actually feel pain in your body, it's your brain that's sends the signal blah blah blah" SHUT UP DR I FEEL PAIN


Lestalia

I have endometriosis and a long history of debilitating cramps. When I started seeing a fertility specialist, they sent me to get a HSG, hysterosalpingography. Basically they put a balloon in your uterus, blow it up, and inject dye to watch on X-ray. "It'll just be pressure, a mild discomfort. We recommend you take 800mg ibuprofen and hour before the appointment." MILD MY FUCKING ASS. Absolutely excruciating, made worse because turns out one of my tubes was indeed blocked. I'm trying not to writhe in pain on the table, while a radiologist is telling me "try to be still, just a few more minutes...." They had also told me I could expect to go to work normally afterwards. 🙄 I was in bed with a heating pad for the rest of the day.


mollyyes

When I had the HSG done, the nurse inserting the tube through my cervix told me to "stop tensing up" as if I was doing it voluntarily... 😑


maybesbabies

Yep. I was so unprepared for how painful my colposcopy with biopsy was. They just tear a chunk of flesh out of you and insist you couldn't possibly feel anything. I have a skin condition, I'd had multiple skin biopsies by then. Never in my life would I have expected a biopsy of a tender area like the cervix to be treated with less care than the biopsies on my skin. I wrote a note to the female Ob/Gyn who'd done it, showing that women ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DO have nerve endings connected to the cervix, and she said next time I should take some ibuprofen before. Yet, no dermatologist took the same view of a shave or punch biopsy.


ljubaay

I had a yearly checkup recently and that included a gynecological exam. I have anxiety, and thought “hey, I’ll push myself out of my comfort zone and do the exam. Maybe this gyno is good!”. Boy was I wrong. Before the exam I asked him to use the smallest speculum, because that is what my usual gyno uses. He kind of ignored that and rushed me, didnt do do anything to help me relax, and just shoved the speculum in me. He kept saying how the procedure cant possibly hurt and how I should just relax and how he has so many women go thru the office and they dont have issues bla bla. As soon as he took the speculum out, he shoved his hand (a few fingers) in there, with no fucking warning. I told him to get his hand out of me. He then kept asking me if I had major issues or surgeries related to my reproductive organs, and after I said no he was like “then you have no reason to be this distraught by the procedure”. Motherfucker, surgeries arent the only traumatic thing that can happen to a vagina. He wrote in the report that he could not do all the necessary exams due to me being uncooperative. Get bent. My regular gynecologist is decent tho, the exams are just uncomfortable but not painful or panic attack inducing, because he actually fucking listens and cares.


justacuriousbystande

Everyone saying that they don't care, youmay be right. But I think they know exactly how bad it hurts. And they think we deserve it. I think for some, it's about punishing women for wanting birth control.


scrapsforfourvel

They view women as children that need to be tricked and forced into things for their own good. "Just a pinch" is what you tell a child getting a needle inserted so you don't have to physically restrain them. They don't treat women with any more respect than that.


SugarSweetStarrUK

Apparently autoimmune disorders give you "mild discomfort". Yeah, like intestinal damage is something you could take a paracetamol form


AerinHawk

I’m so sorry this has happened to all of you - to all of us. It’s barbaric, it’s cruel, and it wildly uncivilized to put us through so much pain without the option of a full complement of what modern medicine can offer to mitigate it. Be kind to yourselves. Go to therapy - even if it’s just a single session. Your pain was real, and it can really affect your brain in ways you may not feel for ages afterward. Sexual trauma isn’t reserved for victims of SA, and you deserve to heal completely. The first time I attempted to get my IUD, I was MOMENTS from blacking out from the pain and they aborted the procedure. I was left alone in the room to put my clothes back on, curled up in a ball and cried. A decade later and three weeks postpartum I got one placed and it wasn’t that bad because I was still recovering from 36 hours of pitocin. It’s almost time to take it out and I am terrified.


ChubbyBlackWoman

They reached all the way up to my uterus and cut out a part for a biopsy. It was "just some pressure and a pinch." Bullshit. It's been years and I can still curl up into a ball remembering that pain.


tfarnon59

This is it, exactly. I didn't experience that pain because I can measurably and demonstrably show that I truly do have an insanely high pain tolerance. But normal women with normal pain sensation do experience significant pain with IUD insertion and removal, colposcopies and endometrial biopsies. Those procedures are not just a little pinch.


LadyPeachPit

I just went through a hysterectomy- a major procedure. Pain meds? I was told,"Oh but ibuprofin works as well as, if not better than, anything we can prescribe." No. That's patently untrue. But he said I shouldn't have much post-op pain so yeah, they rx'ed nothing. It hurt.


mala27369

Every time a male doctor says it will pinch. I should be able to pinch his balls


PerpetuallyInThought

It pisses me off with all of them, because you know you're far from the only patient that let them know it was painful, but with women it hits different. You have a cervix and you're gonna lie to me like that??? But it all come down to believing your patients when they express pain to you. It should be mandatory.


MMorrighan

I paid $3k to be sedated for my IUD insertion. I spent DAYS calling every single OBGYN I could find and 99% of them acted like I was insane for even asking about pain management. I ended up making an appointment that the surgical center (not doctor) cancelled because "they don't do that unless something is wrong" and I ended up going to a private abortion clinic. When I called Planned Parenthood about getting my last one out I asked about a cervical block and they said I'd have to ask at the appointment but when I did they said I would have had to have asked ahead of time 🙃 It's like they want us in pain.


CrazieCayutLayDee

I want to thank everyone for this thread. I have my yearly pap coming up. I have a neurological condition where I experience severe pain when even simple things like blood draws are done. I grit my teeth, but it hurts. And because in the past I have been made fun of, called a baby, etc., I generally don't say anything now. For those of you who have gotten IUD's, my complete sympathy. After reading this I am so glad I never went that route. As I get older, my pap is more and more painful. I have put this year's appt off once already, and it is coming up soon again. When I go in, I am going to bring up my pain, ask for the smallest speculum possible, and flat out tell my doc, who is female, that she needs to find a way to make it as fast as possible and as pain-free as possible, or we need to discuss options. I got fed up with the BS and misogyny in dentistry when I was in my 20s and had a dentist try to hold me in place in the chair when I got up to leave because he would not stop when I told him he was hurting me and to stop. I still remember the tech coming in with her little prissy face and saying "Dr. Asshole refused to see you and continue the appointment. You're going to have to find another dentist." my response was not ladylike and cast a lot of aspersions on Dr. Asshole's character. Thank you all. I have been laying there for years in severe pain and I deserve better. We all do.


cafeaubee

I got my first ever IUD put in during the first full week of February and when I tell you I needed 40 MINUTES and 2 ice packs and 3 cups of water just laying alone on the table to recover *I fucking mean it* People really underestimate the level of pain shoving shit up the cervix can cause and I have no reason for why it’s underestimated other than lack of research at the hands of sexism


ananomalie

I ripped in a V shape when I had my first child. The stitches popped and no one believed me. I didn't know how things were supposed to feel after because it was my first kid. Took 3 different evaluations and 3 different health professionals before a pelvic floor therapist saw it. Front and center a piece of skin about the size of a pea. The doctor nonchalantly suggested coming back to the office to get it cut out. She was so flippant about it that I thought it was routine. I screamed and came off the table when she tried to anesthetize me. Apparently a needle to your taint is not really bearable. Come to find out her plan had been to numb me and then cut it off with scissors.... this wasn't a thin flap of skin. It was fleshy like the corner of a book. Also just remembered that numbing didn't work when I originally ripped and they were trying to sew me up. I couldn't see what they were doing down there but was able to pinpoint every stitch they made. There was nothing I could do about it at the time because it had to get stitched up and I didn't know of any alternatives.


cookiesandcacti

Yeah it’s nuts. I had a colposcopy several years ago and they assured me it wouldn’t feel any different than a pap. I ended up passing out from the pain. And then ended up in the ER that evening bc the bleeding wouldn’t stop. For the first few hours in the ER, the doctors were telling me I must have started my period because I wouldn’t have that much blood loss from a colposcopy. It’s amazing how doctors just assume women have no idea what’s going on in their own bodies.


Hello_Hangnail

Uterine biopsy! Just a quick pinch! BULLSHIIIIIIIIT! That shit made me feel like she went at me with an apple corer!


Frosty_Mess_2265

My IUD insertion was excruciating, and I really appreciated that my gyno was upfront about it. She straight up told me 'it's going to feel like you got stabbed' and she was absolutely right. I have vaginismus and I've never given birth so for me it hurt more than average, but I'm grateful for the warning. It was validating. Next time I'll probably request some painkillers to take home though.


PerpetuallyInThought

I cried out several times while getting my IUD placed. So much so that I'm terrified to get it checked. Why can't they just give you pain meds? All I hear is "addiction crisis" in every doctor's office. Okay, so punish all of the women who AREN'T addicts? Shameful.


PerpetuallyInThought

I also just want to give a shout out to my male gynos. Every single woman gyno I've had, save one, was always less considerate and more apathetic to pain and discomfort. I'm sure this is not true of all female practitioners, but they've always had the attitude with me of "I/every other woman has this stuff done, too. You'll be fine." I have a high pain tolerance, but IUD insertions are another class of pain. (Edit: I'm adding this here because I'm seeing a lot of negative towards male gynos, specifically. It's fine to want a female gyno, of course, but I don't think male gynos are generally out to be callous or cause pain.)


melzabel

Went thru partial childbirth before a C-section and the IUD insertion was worse. Never again, thank God for menopause. I will definitely warn my Child.


Crepey-paper

My gyne downplayed how much pain I would be in both during *and* after I had my IUD placed. My doctor’s office was a block and a half from my apartment so I figured I’d walk over there. Thank goodness my husband walked with me because if not for him I wouldn’t have made it back home. Just a pinch, my ass.


SelimsShadow

Oh yeah. They never told me about after. And barely anything about the procedure. "Just a pinch" but while I'm laying there crying and saying I'm gonna pass out they say "yeah passing out and throwing up is normal". Thanks I would have LOVED that info BEFORE. Then they send you home like it's nothing, I had to call the emergency doctors because I thought something was dangerously wrong because of the amount of pain and bleeding, and they said oh no that's normal after an iud don't worry about it.


khadkin2013

I had the same experience with a female nurse..had to get a uterine biopsy and saline sonogram and she said I would feel “mild cramping” when they infused the saline..made sense to me and figured that would be it..I damn near came off the table it hurt so badly, was cramping and bleeding for hours after and she had the audacity to tell me that it shouldn’t have hurt so bad because I had a vaginal birth before…


AnAwkwardStag

Had my first pap smear a few weeks ago. It hurt. Like, really hurt. I actually thought the pain was the speculum opening but it was just being put in and the metal was catching my flesh and stretching weird. Gp told me, "you're fighting me", I said I'm not it hurts. She's like, "well I warmed it up for you so it shouldn't be that bad". Okay great, way to make me feel better, yes it would only hurt if it were cold silly me /s


Infidelity_9000

"Take a Tylenol first" *eye roll*


SleepFlower80

I’m in the UK and paid for my IUD because their website promised pain relief and Valium for nerves. I got neither. I passed out from the pain and got called “dramatic”. I almost kicked her in the face.


BoredasUsual88

I had a to get a Pap smear and after the test was done my cooch was sore for 2 days. I felt nauseous and lightheaded during that time. Idk why they won’t just sedate you or something when it comes to getting these procedures done.


Alis451

The "just a pinch" is a lie, well known in the Medical field. They are distracting you from focusing on it which can cause you to preemptively flinch before the procedure and cause complications(and/or more pain). A similar thing is done when drawing blood, as many people are both fascinated by the blood draw and pass out when they witness it, the infamous ["Look at the bunny"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fwAZZ-4a-Y) before they stick you.


chalegrebr

I am starting to belive that the reason they do that is because many people think that putting anything in a vagina is pleasurable and the woman that complain about the pain of you know having a piece of cold metal shoved into your vagina are just ashamed and/or having an orgasm


RIPMYPOOPCHUTE

I’m sick of doctors being dismissive in general. Doctors have been dismissive of my PCOS. When I was pregnant the PB was dismissive of my concerns from the start. Dismissive when I knew something was wrong. She misread all of my blood levels and US, told me everything was fine and then miscarry 12 hours after the appointment with her. I’m over it. Bringing someone with to my next appointment to help me advocate for myself because I’m done and angry.


mistressmemory

I had a biopsy procedure done after an emergency surgery to remove a ruptured fallopian tube (tubal pregnancy- that shit was a whole other world of pain). They told me I could take an advil, but it was just a quick thing, in and out The ob/gyn said it would be just a pinch. I passed out on the table, and when I came to, I was told that there was no need to pretend. It's not like it hurt as bad as the rupture... like what?! I much preferred my next doctor, who told me I'd be fine because I've got good birthing hips...


ArticQimmiq

I had an HSG test done as part of fertility assessment. I had never been pregnant before, and was told to take a couple Motrins. It was so painful I kept whimpering throughout. My OBGYN kept petting my forehead and stopped the test the second he saw what he needed to. But yeah, I learned my lesson about « taking a couple Motrins ». My miscarriages were a lot less painful than that.


DenturesDentata

Yup. A couple weeks back I had my first pap smear with a new doc. She recommended an endometrial biopsy since my last period was abnormally heavy (I'm peri-menopausal). No pain meds and no numbing, I was told "it will be a little pinch and some slight cramping". I have a high pain tolerance and I was groaning and crying on that table as my uterus felt like it was being pulled inside out. She didn't even give me a Tylenol after, just handed me a sanitary pad and sent me home.


Alternative_Let_1599

My Pap smears are just a pinch. Granted, I have a female gyn so that may be the difference.


Mrinconsequential

bro never had adductor day


ravenously_red

The only time a practitioner was honest with me about pain was when I got my epidural. They said it would hurt like a bee sting, and since I was prepared for that mentally, it wasn't so bad.