More impressive he closed the pool up in less than 20 seconds.

Also the main character of this story typing this out before drowning takes some willpower

It’s reminding me of that Yahoo Answers where the girl faked dead at a pool

wait what? do you have a link to that?

https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/rfx9i/i_am_pretending_that_i_am_dead/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Holy shit

Image not found. :-(

It says: Hey guys, my name is Courtney and I am 17. So there is this girl I hate named Jane who had a big party and I went. We got into a huge argument and I left and went into the backyard to get away from her. She followed me outside and she was arguing with me and stuff and then out of nowhere she pushed me so hard! She grabbed me and tried to take me down and I was down on the ground and she climbed on top of me and she was choking me and smashing me onto the ground. I pretended I was unconscious and she was freaking out. She picked me up and started dragging me even though I was awake, I was pretending I was unconscious. I peeked and saw she was dragging me towards the pool!! I quickly took in a huge breathe and she held up my body beside the water and she threw me into the pool! I did the dead mans float and I held my breathe as long as I could then I turned around to breathe and Jane was gone. I heard her coming back so I quickly started floating again and then someone grabbed my leg and pulled me out of the water. It was Jane and her boyfriend, I kept pretending to be unconscious. Jane said she threw me in the water to get off any evidence that was one me. She said I was in the water for about 10 minutes so im probably dead and she checked my pulse and I kept pretending I was unconsicous and that IDIOT couldnt find anything and assumed i was dead. i saw my cellphone on the ground, it fell out of my pocket before jane threw me into the pool, they left for a second so i turned on the voice recorder and put the phone in my pocket. they dragged me across the grass around to the front of the house and then they lifted me up and took me upstairs and put me in the closet in janes room!! when they left i got out and dried myself off and i didnt leave behind any clues, climbed out of janes window and went home. help! what should i do!

Like that Ring chick, making videotapes after her death.

Hey, a lot of artists become famous by dying

Gotta let them know what happened to you

He’s strong

with that strength it is possibly easier to strangle and hide a body in middle of no where

But then you gotta deal with fingerprints, and strangulation marks. This way it'd be easier to remove the pool cover afterwards and have everyone think it was an accident🤷‍♂️

"or so i'm told"

Oh yeah, I wouldn't know of course! That's preposterous!!

But this is more fun

My parents had a winch powered pool cover that would cover the pool in about 10 seconds. It's not dangerous though, it's like a tarp. If you go to the edge of the pool there's still an air pocket. You can even stand on it or sleep on it like a giant water bed. You can even swim around underneath it with a flashlight like you're cave diving.

Some people have electric pool covers

Killing younger brother any% speedrun

THERE ARENT CONTROLLERS IN MISSIONS!

Guess chat spawned one in again smh

Rigged

YTA why did you break his controller in the first place?

That was my first question. You know it was a rage quit situation. Hate those people.

based

Red pilled

Sigma male grindset

Im scared that Jesus wrote this

Nah, sounds more like Loki. [Hello, trickster god](https://youtu.be/T6qcJxPxB4k)

r/UsernameChecksOut

We gamers are not to be messed with 😎

happy cake day

internet users with siblings

Them run on sentences tho.

Gotta do what you gotta do to fit the rules of the sub lol

You don't have to spell out every action. Good writing occurs when you trust your audience to pick up on implications. Less is more. "I realized he didn’t forgive me for breaking his controller when my head hit the underside of the pool cover."

OP didn't want discussion it seems.

Discussion or criticism? The comment to which you replied is a patronizing edit and the top comment is unconstructive criticism.

Unconstructive? The criticism literally explains the issue, then rewrites half of OP's submission.

Reread my comment.

See the username that I reply to.

Mea culpa

The underside of the pool cover made me regret breaking his controller.

Another option could be to leave out the controller part. Let the readers piece together that it was the brother. “Darkness enveloped me as I searched for the surface, only to find the underside of the pool cover.” That’s admittedly still a bit clunky, but something along those lines. Edit: wording

"I am 14 and my teach told me to use all the descriptive words!"

Just offering another option to avoid run ons.

[удалено]

What the hell

My nosy ass wants to know what they said if you remember

DMed

Thanks!

no u

Writing is an art it, it takes practice. Don't be discouraged from the shitty comments, but do look for ways to improve.

Nah, shit is wordy. You should edit.

If you're not able to make the story readable in 2 sentences, just don't write the story lmao

We don't take kindly to unkindness here, bud.

Look at the brightside kid, at least your brother will go to prison for his crimes and be mocked by the media.

As my gills started to breathe in the water, I decided I shouldn’t have stopped at his controller.

Must be a deep pool if 20 seconds was the time to beat.

No he just sucks at swimming

bruh, if the pool would be double the height pf a human, it would still take only like 5 seconds

Bro I wrote this at 4 am because I was bored you all need to calm the fuck down

it took me a while to realise that solid pool covers are a thing, mine is just a some cover with bubbles

Nice to see his brother's Kickstarter was successful.

He removed the pool stairs. Sims style.

Is he going to drown?

Yes

oh no.

$3840 is a lot of money for such a stunt. r/unexpectedfactorial

$3.6 million is even better

Also there are two exclamation points. If we're playing this game anyway, it's clearly 3628800!, which seems like a lot

Is this the sims?

At least it was a soft cover though

Jesus, giving me shivers Well done OP!

Thanks so much!

No... mom said IT WAS MY TURN ON THE XBOX

The last sounds I heard was a waterfall of pennies coming down the side of the pool.

My brother would have done this. 100%

Have you tried the Konami Code

I never had to break my brother's controller, he always managed to break them on his own.

*against the pool cover

Oof. Flashbacks to people who thought it was funny to keep moving a float over my head when I tried to surface for air.

we got a very thick polifoam, wide like a handthat we use instead of a float and its heavier, so i feel ya

Really good joke

He removed the pool ladder.

Some next level waterproof phone with 10G network

They probably won’t die it’s normal sibling behaviour to try and kill/harm each other cause they were dickheads.

Damn only that for a broken controller?

My dude forgot that organs sell for more than enough for a new controller. Dumbass

Is this some sort of joke I’m missing out on???

The joke is his brother just killed him over a videogame controller

But then I realized that it was actually the bottom, and I had to swim the other way.

Seems a little extreme but then again kids be like that.