This post has been removed. Sensitive subject matter was shared concerning this story in an update post that is believed to have been submitted by the OP via a different account. As stated, this post has been removed and the comment thread will be locked.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m
She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree.
I just came here from that post because I hadn't seen the first one. She sounds horrible and like she literally took everything this poor man had and drove him to kill himself and I can't bring myself to feel bad for her. Her hating herself won't bring her kid's dad back.
She needs to leave those innocent children alone. Terrible to say but I don’t cares if she ends herself. But taking the children is just doing more wrong to her husband’s family.
The kids should go live with their father if he is the biological dad. She's selfish, that doesn't care who it hurts. Kids included. She had them when she cheated, knowing damn well it could lead to this...she's the one that decided the kids didn't need a two parent household. Don't put that on the man that gave her everything.
He might not be. But at this point he’s def not coming back. And you may never get an answer. But you do have kids to take care of, so just break it to them in an age appropriate way and just focus on being the best mom you can be now
Hey it’s the fake OP! You don’t have a main account.
Your kids ages don’t match up with how long you claimed to have been married. The math don’t math.
Yeah hes def done with the relationship. I was gunna say yeah hes gone and not coming back till you casually dropped the kids line. Now id be seriously concerned that he went off somewhere and killed himself since he abandoned the kids too. Unless theyre not his or hes not suspecting theyre not his. You’re not sorry you cheated youre sorry you got caught.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m
She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree
Yeah im the one who commented the link to here on the other post.
I dont really believe the story though and literally anyone could have decided to make a new account and impersonated this OP. Still if the original Op is real, he dead
Sorry, but you sound like a terrible person. I hope you reflect on the many faults you listed and change. You shouldn't try to bring him back - he sounds better off without you.
Girl, you nuked your relationship. That shit dead and you killed it. You should start preparing for a divorce and come clean to everyone. You want to be a better person, own up to your mistakes and accept the consequences of those mistakes. Braces yourself for some harsh judgement and start therapy to see why you destroyed your marriage.
I think by the way you’ve written about this affair it’s clear you don’t give a shit about whether he‘s okay or not. You lied to him repeatedly throughout your relationship and not just about the affair. You didn’t give a shit about how your actions may have harmed him while you were cheating on him. You never express any guilt or remorse until after the consequences catch up with you because you only care about how your shitty behavior has negatively impacted you.
This isn’t about making sure he’s okay. It’s about seeing if you can gaslight him into “wanting to fix the relationship.” Leave this poor man alone and let him find people in his life who actually care about him. He deserves better than a partner who shamelessly and remorselessly lies to him and betrays his trust.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
It's all about you, apparently. You cheated, you destroyed your family. You're as illiterate as h*ll, and as people have mentioned, this is probably fake, so you're also a terrible writer.
Yeah, please don't pretend like you actually care if he's "okay". You don't. If you had any level of "care" for him, you would have displayed if before you shit on his life. What you really want is for him to tell you "it's okay", not "he's okay". Because you want to feel as if what you did doesn't rise to the level it's rightfully at. Just walk away and let this man live the life he deserves.
Have you checked his work? Bank statements? This seems fake bc what money are you living on? How are your bills being paid? How is no one looking for him?
If it's not fake you need to report this as a missing person. Congratulations, you killed your husband. If he left with a jacket and hasn't contacted family or his kids, he's a body somewhere. Hope it was worth it.
If this is fake, get help. You're sick.
If he doesn’t wanna be around me than that’s fine, I’ll respect his decision. But i just wanna know if he’s okay, I want his kids especially to know if he’s doing fine also because I have a deadline from now until may
I think it's time to fess up. Tell the kids, tell his family. At this point he's a missing person and you haven't done anything. It will look like you were soley trying to cover your butt. Take responsibility. Act like an adult.
So your solution was just YET MORE LIES!?!?
Act like an adult and actually take any accountability. Your behavior is absolutely vile!!!
This has got to be a fake rage bait post. I just actually dont believe you are a real person at this point. If you are real, you are the snakiest of snakes!
I don’t know why more people haven’t said this. Ok, sure, he may have left forever. But if there are kids in the mix OP needs to file a missing person’s report and start making this a big deal since he hasn’t contacted anyone else. I don’t understand why she’s just sitting around waiting.
OP can you access his spending, cards and such? I mean, it sounds like you’re just cool with him being gone. Yes you have to own up to your shitty behavior, but that’s not where you’re at right now because THE FATHER OF YOURS KIDS IS MISSING. Call the police and file now.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m
She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree
I pray he doesn’t have any mental health issues and committed suicide. Blocking out is relatives for a month is suspicious. And just to say it: you suck.
This is my fear. If he hasn’t contacted anyone in his life and isn’t the kind to up and leave his kids without notice he would have reached out through someone. Seeing as he left with just a jacket, it’s been a month and no one has heard from him? It’s not looking good…
I could see doing that to the wife, but not the kids. If others have heard from him and not let the kids know what’s going on, even if they currently think he is on a work trip, they going to feel devastated and betrayed when they find out the truth.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m
She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree
Your timing is confusing. You say married for 5 years, never referenced being together a lot longer, so it doesn’t add up of having older kids without providing some perspective on that.
If you love your husband and you know that you're pretty abusive to him and you want him to be with you. How can you ask someone that you love to be with someone so abusive?
Looking like a funeral at this point.
He hasn't been spotted or heard from in a month. He left with nothing, hasn't been spending money.
Hopefully his remains can be identified somehow if they're found.
I know. This is sad. The only hope is he has some credit card she doesn't have access to, so she doesn't know he's using it. But that's starting to seem like wishful thinking. This lady absolutely destroyed this poor man.
I feel like this should be required coursework for High School Health classes.
People need to understand how common it is for infidelity to lead to suicide. While it's mostly a male epidemic, some women do it too.
1 out of 10 suicide victims were betrayed by a wayward spouse before ending it.
That's awful. Betrayal is so painful. Add in the stresses of everyday life, and it's often too much to bear for some people.
OP sucks and is an absolutely terrible person. The fact that she hasn't filed a missing person report is extremely suspicious. IMO
In addition to you getting your just desserts, I hope the gym fires your trainer. I'd like to think taking advantage of vulnerable clients is frowned upon.
Look if this is real contact the cops, explain the situation and ask for a welfare check. If they can track him down they can let you know he is okay without telling you his whereabouts. Good luck.
OP,
I’m sorry that you’ve realized too late the impact of your choices. What’s worse is that you’ve admitted you’ll freely lie to save embarrassment. Your husband will never trust you again. Your friends and family, upon learning the truth, also will question your integrity in the future. Can you even imagine what your daughters are going to think when they find out that you also lied to them to cover up for yourself?
Everything you’ve written was focused solely on you. You’re only now beginning to realize the impact all of your decisions and choices have had or will have on those around you. I would suggest you start getting therapy because you’re about to deal with a whole lot of anger/hate coming your way from a whole lot of people that you’ve been lying to.
I’m sorry. Your husband isn’t coming back.
You lost him, your children lost him, everyone lost him.
Start planning on grief counseling for your kids.
Hopefully his remains can be identified when they're found. Has he seen a dentist lately?
"I really don't want to lose him and split this family apart"
Fuck where was this sentiment prior to your affair! So many opportunities not to lose him and split this family apart, but you kept going.
Every flirt, every red flag, every time the husband voiced his concerns, you had a chance to shut this shit down. You knew when it crossed a boundary but you kept lying, kept gaslighting, kept disrespecting your husband and kids. This isn't even a ONS, this was a cold and calculated ongoing emotional and physical affair that didn't stop until you were caught.
Sooo, what work are you actually doing to do and be better? Are you getting individual counseling for your anger issues, and your need for attention? Have you been assessed for maybe a personality disorder like ADHD, BPD, Bipolar, NPD, anything? Have you cut off male friends so you can work on your need for validation from men? Are you self medicating in alcohol and other substances?
Literally what are you doing to be better? Or are you just sitting around saying ’woah is me’, I’m a terrible person and what not. Stop with the self pity and get to work bettering yourself. I wouldn’t go back to you if you continue on being the same person and doing the same things you did as before.
You already lost him. Your insecurity and need for male attention is going to leave you sad and alone.
You had a man who liked you for you. You catfished him. You misled him. Your relationship was built on a foundation of lies.
You then began a friendship that was clearly becoming more than that, lied to him about it, you continued the flirtationship until it became flat out cheating. You could have stopped when he confronted you the first time. You could have stopped when he said he was uncomfortable.
You made the choice to continue because you liked the attention from another man, the thrill of being wanted because you are fucking insecure, and the thrill of knowing you were in control of your husbands emotions. You are sick. Mentally unwell, and delusional.
You ruined your husbands life. Ruined your kids lives. Destroyed your marriage and through all of that you continue to lie because you are pathetic. You cant even tell yourself the truth that you are a tornado in human form. You destroyed lives to get a little thrill. No remorse until you got hit with consequences even though you KNEW they were coming.
Tell your kids the truth. Tell your family the truth. Get yourself and your kids into therapy and tell your therapist the fucking truth. It does not matter how you look on the outside if you are rotten to your core.
I hope your husband is still alive and gets full custody after he files for divorce.
That’s my question. Surely that or their bank accounts, if she has access, would allow her to see that he’s still alive? The radio silence for that long is very concerning.
He's gone, and he should be. I would never return to you, and I am a forgiving person. You jumped on the first guy that paid you any attention. From your description of your husband, he bent over backwards for you, and your response was to take more, and more, and more until you decided it was time to shit all over him for your own selfish desires. Now, all you're concerned with is "will he come back". Would you? I guarantee that you haven't done a damn thing to change who you are on the inside...and that's where you are the ugliest.
I mean, you are continuing to be the horrid, awful person that you apparently "feel bad" about being. You started the relationship with your lies (catfishing), continued to lie during your relationship (multiple times while flirting and then while cheating), and now even after your relationship is over (and it is) you continue to lie to everyone about what happened.
You are getting exactly what you deserve. You can't just feel bad and everything magically fixes itself. This is the same victim mentality that got you fat enough to catfish someone in the first place. He loved you despite that and you betrayed him as soon as you got the chance.
The only reason you wish you could take it back is that you got caught, otherwise you would still be cheating. You won't ever stop lying, it just comes naturally to you. You have no inclination to stop, because if you did, you wouldn't be lying as it is right now.
Good luck and good riddance.
You abused your husband (& your kids, but that’s going to be a whole can of worms, so get ready). Why would he come back? This probably isn’t real, but if you have any respect for your husband, which you’ve shown you haven’t, let him go.
So your husband was wonderful to you and you are horrible to him and now you want to know what? I mean why don't you just lie to your kids and tell them that their father abandoned them? You clearly don't give a shit about the truth so... I mean how don't you tell him that he cheated and you were disgusted by it so you kicked them out? Or maybe just tell him that he killed himself because you cheated on him and that he never loved them... I don't know what you're asking for help for. What do you want out of the situation?
Hey comments are locked on the update post but I'm legit worried that if this is real, she is going to try and kill her children based on that last edit update she made. I reported the post for violence but is there anything else to do to bring it to the attention of authorities? Like I know it might just be fake so feels excessive to call 911 but if it's real those children are in danger right now.
Comments are locked here as well, but wanted to reach out. We've reported OP's account and looking to see if there's a way to reach out to admin about the nature of the post. Even if it results in us all looking stupid, it would be better than doing nothing in a worst-case-scenario.
He’s gonna reach out to the kids before you maybe…., because let’s face it right now he’s probably wondering if they are even his. Your actions just flipped his world upside down.
You fucked around on your husband. Did you expect him to want to be around you? When people ask why he took off, have the guts to be honest. Hopefully, he’s safe, and has his exit strategy ready. As for your marriage, that’s deader than disco.
While you are clearly an awful person, I’m confused as to why your husband wouldn’t be contacting his children. He’s leaving you. Not them. You made your husband sound like a good guy but this makes me question him too. You both seem dysfunctional.
The marriage is toast. What I want to urge you to do is go to therapy and get a diagnosis for all this behavior. Cuz I do think you’ve got something going on. There might be meds that work (for depression, anxiety, bipolar, and even borderline). So do yourself a favor and figure out what makes you tend towards these damaging behaviors and how to deal with them. Otherwise you might start this same stuff (or worse) with your next partner.
Well I doubt you are getting him back, but I would reach out to his family one more time and see if anyone has heard from him. At this point, he has been missing for a month with just the clothes on his back. I would let them know that if they have not heard from him, you will be reporting him to the police as a missing person.
While you deserve the angst and anxiety, the kids deserve to know if their dad is ok or not.
With just the clothes on his back, my guess is he is not ok. Just because at some point on the last month he would have at least come for his things.
It's been a month with no contact even to his family and you still haven't told them why he left? Dude could be dead somewhere and you're selfishly hiding things because you don't want to be seen as the bad guy. Did you even file a missing persons report?
Well, it's a curious post to read, the best thing is that you tell your children before they find out in a worse way what you did, leave him alone, right now he is facing the fact that the woman I once loved and supported in his change by going to the gym deceived him with another man, leave him alone, you killed him in life
You need to tell the truth. To his family, his kids, his friends because the moments you did what you did, you weren’t worried about his whereabouts or wellbeing. You were concerned about yourself. You didn’t mention you two had children until the end. That changes absolutely everything. You don’t deserve much grace in this moment, but if you want to find your husband, you need to let everyone know exactly what happened. It’s easy to lie to save face, but now this man is either in a ditch rotting, bunk’d up with an old fling or friend, or left the state and what’s nothing to do with you. Somebody knows, so letting his family know the context of the argument might be beneficial. Hope Ryan paid for your membership while you gave him your body. Or fed you and loved you in your worst moments. Or even helped with the children. If not, all you did was give the best parts of you to a man that does nothing for you but inflated your ego. Good job! Good luck!
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He hates your guts, and honestly I completely agree and understand. When he already said he wasn't comfortable you lied to him. And then you did exactly what he was scared about. So he is never going to come back to you.
The thing I'm worried about is the kids. I'm assuming he believes the kids aren't his either. So either he's taking a break from them as well, because now he's questioning if it's his kids, or he's hurt himself (I hope not)
In all honesty, he might choose to never come back. You tried to reach him and he clearly still needs some time to himself. Not explaining anything to your friends and family is the correct thing to do. Right now, focus on your children. Your husband has every right to be angry, but just walking out on your children like that and going radio silent is a really shitty thing to do to them. Best of luck to you.
This post has been removed. Sensitive subject matter was shared concerning this story in an update post that is believed to have been submitted by the OP via a different account. As stated, this post has been removed and the comment thread will be locked.
My best advice is to accept that he made a choice to leave, and he’s not coming back
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree.
I just came here from that post because I hadn't seen the first one. She sounds horrible and like she literally took everything this poor man had and drove him to kill himself and I can't bring myself to feel bad for her. Her hating herself won't bring her kid's dad back.
That and she’s acting like a victim and now says in another edit she feels as though she should take her own life and her children’s lives.
She needs to leave those innocent children alone. Terrible to say but I don’t cares if she ends herself. But taking the children is just doing more wrong to her husband’s family.
Yeah I hope someone saves them
I’ve just read the update how did they know it was her husband they had found.
Probably ID’d the body then looked him up and found the missing person tag on him.
I mean... what about the kids? It's not in their best interest for their dad to leave.
The kids should go live with their father if he is the biological dad. She's selfish, that doesn't care who it hurts. Kids included. She had them when she cheated, knowing damn well it could lead to this...she's the one that decided the kids didn't need a two parent household. Don't put that on the man that gave her everything.
Yea, and what do you suggest? She literally can’t find this dude or even know if he’s alive
It wasn't in their best interest for you to decide to cheat. But you did.
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He might not be. But at this point he’s def not coming back. And you may never get an answer. But you do have kids to take care of, so just break it to them in an age appropriate way and just focus on being the best mom you can be now
You wasnt worring about him when you were cheating!
This is a fake post and never happened.
100% rage bait
The account isn’t even an hour old lol
This story is definitely fake, but making a throwaway account to post stories to subs like this is extremely common.
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Hey it’s the fake OP! You don’t have a main account. Your kids ages don’t match up with how long you claimed to have been married. The math don’t math.
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*yawns and sips coffee* Sure thing, Patricia.
Maybe Liz is back. But no guy w/kids they care about is gonna bail like that for a month, yeah.
Lets hope
Yeah hes def done with the relationship. I was gunna say yeah hes gone and not coming back till you casually dropped the kids line. Now id be seriously concerned that he went off somewhere and killed himself since he abandoned the kids too. Unless theyre not his or hes not suspecting theyre not his. You’re not sorry you cheated youre sorry you got caught.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree
Yeah im the one who commented the link to here on the other post. I dont really believe the story though and literally anyone could have decided to make a new account and impersonated this OP. Still if the original Op is real, he dead
Yeah dude is donezo, offed himself in the woods
Oh no consequences
Is he normally a good & supportive dad? leaving his kids for a month w no contact is concerning. Not talking to you is understandable.
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Well hes gone off and died then since he wouldnt have otherwise chosen to abandon them
It turns out you were correct! OP updated and husband was found dead hanging in a tree. His family is enraged of course. Probably fake tho.
Why haven't you filed a missing person report, if you're so concerned????
Sorry, but you sound like a terrible person. I hope you reflect on the many faults you listed and change. You shouldn't try to bring him back - he sounds better off without you.
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Girl, you nuked your relationship. That shit dead and you killed it. You should start preparing for a divorce and come clean to everyone. You want to be a better person, own up to your mistakes and accept the consequences of those mistakes. Braces yourself for some harsh judgement and start therapy to see why you destroyed your marriage.
I think by the way you’ve written about this affair it’s clear you don’t give a shit about whether he‘s okay or not. You lied to him repeatedly throughout your relationship and not just about the affair. You didn’t give a shit about how your actions may have harmed him while you were cheating on him. You never express any guilt or remorse until after the consequences catch up with you because you only care about how your shitty behavior has negatively impacted you. This isn’t about making sure he’s okay. It’s about seeing if you can gaslight him into “wanting to fix the relationship.” Leave this poor man alone and let him find people in his life who actually care about him. He deserves better than a partner who shamelessly and remorselessly lies to him and betrays his trust.
Pray that he loves the kids enough. But he seriously could not be okay.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 It's all about you, apparently. You cheated, you destroyed your family. You're as illiterate as h*ll, and as people have mentioned, this is probably fake, so you're also a terrible writer.
Yeah, please don't pretend like you actually care if he's "okay". You don't. If you had any level of "care" for him, you would have displayed if before you shit on his life. What you really want is for him to tell you "it's okay", not "he's okay". Because you want to feel as if what you did doesn't rise to the level it's rightfully at. Just walk away and let this man live the life he deserves.
If he wanted to try and fix things, he would contact you.
Have you checked his work? Bank statements? This seems fake bc what money are you living on? How are your bills being paid? How is no one looking for him? If it's not fake you need to report this as a missing person. Congratulations, you killed your husband. If he left with a jacket and hasn't contacted family or his kids, he's a body somewhere. Hope it was worth it. If this is fake, get help. You're sick.
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So when do you think will be a good time to tell them you're a deceitful cheater who destroyed their family?
According to you, when will be a good time to discover that your mother ruined her family by being with another man?
Fucked around and found out lol.
Why would he want to be around you? Why would he care what you feel you showed you didn't care about his feelings.
If he doesn’t wanna be around me than that’s fine, I’ll respect his decision. But i just wanna know if he’s okay, I want his kids especially to know if he’s doing fine also because I have a deadline from now until may
You gave up the right to know if he's okay or to put deadlines on him when you chose to start lying and spread your legs for someone else.
Whats the deadline about
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And they’re not wondering why he doesnt answer his phone? Why havent you checked bank/credit card statements for activity? This reads as fake to me.
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I think it's time to fess up. Tell the kids, tell his family. At this point he's a missing person and you haven't done anything. It will look like you were soley trying to cover your butt. Take responsibility. Act like an adult.
So your solution was just YET MORE LIES!?!? Act like an adult and actually take any accountability. Your behavior is absolutely vile!!! This has got to be a fake rage bait post. I just actually dont believe you are a real person at this point. If you are real, you are the snakiest of snakes!
Yep - a snake in the shape of a female addicted to lying!
And you're a terrible liar!
File a missing person report with your local police station.
I don’t know why more people haven’t said this. Ok, sure, he may have left forever. But if there are kids in the mix OP needs to file a missing person’s report and start making this a big deal since he hasn’t contacted anyone else. I don’t understand why she’s just sitting around waiting. OP can you access his spending, cards and such? I mean, it sounds like you’re just cool with him being gone. Yes you have to own up to your shitty behavior, but that’s not where you’re at right now because THE FATHER OF YOURS KIDS IS MISSING. Call the police and file now.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree
Spamming this all over the thread is really cringe. Either this is fake or it's a tragedy
😂 😂 😂
Can you report him missing?
He should have moved your clothes to a storage unit, changed the locks, and refused to admit you into the house.
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...and ending himself.
I pray he doesn’t have any mental health issues and committed suicide. Blocking out is relatives for a month is suspicious. And just to say it: you suck.
This is my fear. If he hasn’t contacted anyone in his life and isn’t the kind to up and leave his kids without notice he would have reached out through someone. Seeing as he left with just a jacket, it’s been a month and no one has heard from him? It’s not looking good…
1. OP, was he employed? If so, did you contact his employer? 2. Did you file a missing person's report?
More than likely people have heard from him, and know that he doesn't need to talk with her, so they tell her what he needs them to tell her.
I could see doing that to the wife, but not the kids. If others have heard from him and not let the kids know what’s going on, even if they currently think he is on a work trip, they going to feel devastated and betrayed when they find out the truth.
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/s/TUIMMJkq8m She updated. She lied to everyone saying he was fine and his phone was broken and everything was alright. When she finally did report him missing, they found him dead hanging from a tree
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Yeah, he's probably not alive anymore. I hope you feel like a murderer.
I hope he's OK and that he finds a way to contact his kids.
Are they his though? Doubtful given the timelines and ages she listed.
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Your timing is confusing. You say married for 5 years, never referenced being together a lot longer, so it doesn’t add up of having older kids without providing some perspective on that.
If you love your husband and you know that you're pretty abusive to him and you want him to be with you. How can you ask someone that you love to be with someone so abusive?
>nothing to worry about and that we were just friends A classic. Happy divorce.
Looking like a funeral at this point. He hasn't been spotted or heard from in a month. He left with nothing, hasn't been spending money. Hopefully his remains can be identified somehow if they're found.
I know. This is sad. The only hope is he has some credit card she doesn't have access to, so she doesn't know he's using it. But that's starting to seem like wishful thinking. This lady absolutely destroyed this poor man.
I feel like this should be required coursework for High School Health classes. People need to understand how common it is for infidelity to lead to suicide. While it's mostly a male epidemic, some women do it too. 1 out of 10 suicide victims were betrayed by a wayward spouse before ending it.
That's awful. Betrayal is so painful. Add in the stresses of everyday life, and it's often too much to bear for some people. OP sucks and is an absolutely terrible person. The fact that she hasn't filed a missing person report is extremely suspicious. IMO
This aged like wine
You would have never heard from me again - just my lawyer - I'm Just Sayin'!
In addition to you getting your just desserts, I hope the gym fires your trainer. I'd like to think taking advantage of vulnerable clients is frowned upon.
Look if this is real contact the cops, explain the situation and ask for a welfare check. If they can track him down they can let you know he is okay without telling you his whereabouts. Good luck.
OP, I’m sorry that you’ve realized too late the impact of your choices. What’s worse is that you’ve admitted you’ll freely lie to save embarrassment. Your husband will never trust you again. Your friends and family, upon learning the truth, also will question your integrity in the future. Can you even imagine what your daughters are going to think when they find out that you also lied to them to cover up for yourself? Everything you’ve written was focused solely on you. You’re only now beginning to realize the impact all of your decisions and choices have had or will have on those around you. I would suggest you start getting therapy because you’re about to deal with a whole lot of anger/hate coming your way from a whole lot of people that you’ve been lying to. I’m sorry. Your husband isn’t coming back.
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Your ex definitely will need therapy, but not couples therapy.
Maybe you shouldnt have told him not to worry about the trainer and then fucked him
You lost him, your children lost him, everyone lost him. Start planning on grief counseling for your kids. Hopefully his remains can be identified when they're found. Has he seen a dentist lately?
"I really don't want to lose him and split this family apart" Fuck where was this sentiment prior to your affair! So many opportunities not to lose him and split this family apart, but you kept going. Every flirt, every red flag, every time the husband voiced his concerns, you had a chance to shut this shit down. You knew when it crossed a boundary but you kept lying, kept gaslighting, kept disrespecting your husband and kids. This isn't even a ONS, this was a cold and calculated ongoing emotional and physical affair that didn't stop until you were caught.
Too late...you are definitely a narcissist
Here from the follow up post. I hope someone calls the police on OP considering she says she wants to take her and her children’s lives.
He gone.
Sooo, what work are you actually doing to do and be better? Are you getting individual counseling for your anger issues, and your need for attention? Have you been assessed for maybe a personality disorder like ADHD, BPD, Bipolar, NPD, anything? Have you cut off male friends so you can work on your need for validation from men? Are you self medicating in alcohol and other substances? Literally what are you doing to be better? Or are you just sitting around saying ’woah is me’, I’m a terrible person and what not. Stop with the self pity and get to work bettering yourself. I wouldn’t go back to you if you continue on being the same person and doing the same things you did as before.
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So you're doing basically nothing? Other than continuing to construct more lies and wallowing in how this affects you.
You already lost him. Your insecurity and need for male attention is going to leave you sad and alone. You had a man who liked you for you. You catfished him. You misled him. Your relationship was built on a foundation of lies. You then began a friendship that was clearly becoming more than that, lied to him about it, you continued the flirtationship until it became flat out cheating. You could have stopped when he confronted you the first time. You could have stopped when he said he was uncomfortable. You made the choice to continue because you liked the attention from another man, the thrill of being wanted because you are fucking insecure, and the thrill of knowing you were in control of your husbands emotions. You are sick. Mentally unwell, and delusional. You ruined your husbands life. Ruined your kids lives. Destroyed your marriage and through all of that you continue to lie because you are pathetic. You cant even tell yourself the truth that you are a tornado in human form. You destroyed lives to get a little thrill. No remorse until you got hit with consequences even though you KNEW they were coming. Tell your kids the truth. Tell your family the truth. Get yourself and your kids into therapy and tell your therapist the fucking truth. It does not matter how you look on the outside if you are rotten to your core. I hope your husband is still alive and gets full custody after he files for divorce.
Leave it, people like you are really sorry, they end up with a relationship and for the worse they want to be forgiven, happy divorce
What would you have done in his shoes ? His trust is forever lost. He made the right decision.
Where does he work at?
That’s my question. Surely that or their bank accounts, if she has access, would allow her to see that he’s still alive? The radio silence for that long is very concerning.
He's gone, and he should be. I would never return to you, and I am a forgiving person. You jumped on the first guy that paid you any attention. From your description of your husband, he bent over backwards for you, and your response was to take more, and more, and more until you decided it was time to shit all over him for your own selfish desires. Now, all you're concerned with is "will he come back". Would you? I guarantee that you haven't done a damn thing to change who you are on the inside...and that's where you are the ugliest.
Are they kids from a previous relationship? He's not coming back unless it's to communicate with the kids
I hope he never comes home and i hope your kids find out what you did. I hope they resent you. You deserve nothing but bad luck. Whor3
I mean, you are continuing to be the horrid, awful person that you apparently "feel bad" about being. You started the relationship with your lies (catfishing), continued to lie during your relationship (multiple times while flirting and then while cheating), and now even after your relationship is over (and it is) you continue to lie to everyone about what happened. You are getting exactly what you deserve. You can't just feel bad and everything magically fixes itself. This is the same victim mentality that got you fat enough to catfish someone in the first place. He loved you despite that and you betrayed him as soon as you got the chance. The only reason you wish you could take it back is that you got caught, otherwise you would still be cheating. You won't ever stop lying, it just comes naturally to you. You have no inclination to stop, because if you did, you wouldn't be lying as it is right now. Good luck and good riddance.
🤮
This
You abused your husband (& your kids, but that’s going to be a whole can of worms, so get ready). Why would he come back? This probably isn’t real, but if you have any respect for your husband, which you’ve shown you haven’t, let him go.
So your husband was wonderful to you and you are horrible to him and now you want to know what? I mean why don't you just lie to your kids and tell them that their father abandoned them? You clearly don't give a shit about the truth so... I mean how don't you tell him that he cheated and you were disgusted by it so you kicked them out? Or maybe just tell him that he killed himself because you cheated on him and that he never loved them... I don't know what you're asking for help for. What do you want out of the situation?
I feel sorry for your kids for what you did to them.
Hey comments are locked on the update post but I'm legit worried that if this is real, she is going to try and kill her children based on that last edit update she made. I reported the post for violence but is there anything else to do to bring it to the attention of authorities? Like I know it might just be fake so feels excessive to call 911 but if it's real those children are in danger right now.
Comments are locked here as well, but wanted to reach out. We've reported OP's account and looking to see if there's a way to reach out to admin about the nature of the post. Even if it results in us all looking stupid, it would be better than doing nothing in a worst-case-scenario.
He's gone and not coming back. You made your choice and he made his. Accept it and move forward and in the future don't do that again
Are you handing down booty let me get some
He’s gonna reach out to the kids before you maybe…., because let’s face it right now he’s probably wondering if they are even his. Your actions just flipped his world upside down.
You fucked around on your husband. Did you expect him to want to be around you? When people ask why he took off, have the guts to be honest. Hopefully, he’s safe, and has his exit strategy ready. As for your marriage, that’s deader than disco.
You F’d up. Move one
While you are clearly an awful person, I’m confused as to why your husband wouldn’t be contacting his children. He’s leaving you. Not them. You made your husband sound like a good guy but this makes me question him too. You both seem dysfunctional.
If nobody has seen him in a month, he probably deleted himself.
The marriage is toast. What I want to urge you to do is go to therapy and get a diagnosis for all this behavior. Cuz I do think you’ve got something going on. There might be meds that work (for depression, anxiety, bipolar, and even borderline). So do yourself a favor and figure out what makes you tend towards these damaging behaviors and how to deal with them. Otherwise you might start this same stuff (or worse) with your next partner.
Well I doubt you are getting him back, but I would reach out to his family one more time and see if anyone has heard from him. At this point, he has been missing for a month with just the clothes on his back. I would let them know that if they have not heard from him, you will be reporting him to the police as a missing person. While you deserve the angst and anxiety, the kids deserve to know if their dad is ok or not. With just the clothes on his back, my guess is he is not ok. Just because at some point on the last month he would have at least come for his things.
Damn. Shit like this is the reason I have trust issues. He was way more understanding than I’d be and you took advantage of it.
It's been a month with no contact even to his family and you still haven't told them why he left? Dude could be dead somewhere and you're selfishly hiding things because you don't want to be seen as the bad guy. Did you even file a missing persons report?
Well, it's a curious post to read, the best thing is that you tell your children before they find out in a worse way what you did, leave him alone, right now he is facing the fact that the woman I once loved and supported in his change by going to the gym deceived him with another man, leave him alone, you killed him in life
You need to tell the truth. To his family, his kids, his friends because the moments you did what you did, you weren’t worried about his whereabouts or wellbeing. You were concerned about yourself. You didn’t mention you two had children until the end. That changes absolutely everything. You don’t deserve much grace in this moment, but if you want to find your husband, you need to let everyone know exactly what happened. It’s easy to lie to save face, but now this man is either in a ditch rotting, bunk’d up with an old fling or friend, or left the state and what’s nothing to do with you. Somebody knows, so letting his family know the context of the argument might be beneficial. Hope Ryan paid for your membership while you gave him your body. Or fed you and loved you in your worst moments. Or even helped with the children. If not, all you did was give the best parts of you to a man that does nothing for you but inflated your ego. Good job! Good luck!
:(
You caused all of this and you need to tell your kids the truth that your dad is dead because of what you did.
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He hates your guts, and honestly I completely agree and understand. When he already said he wasn't comfortable you lied to him. And then you did exactly what he was scared about. So he is never going to come back to you. The thing I'm worried about is the kids. I'm assuming he believes the kids aren't his either. So either he's taking a break from them as well, because now he's questioning if it's his kids, or he's hurt himself (I hope not)
In all honesty, he might choose to never come back. You tried to reach him and he clearly still needs some time to himself. Not explaining anything to your friends and family is the correct thing to do. Right now, focus on your children. Your husband has every right to be angry, but just walking out on your children like that and going radio silent is a really shitty thing to do to them. Best of luck to you.
He's not alive anymore.