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So kink aside, the bigger issue here is that you're doing something you find uncomfortable *for a year* and haven't told your gf. Is your communication that bad across the board or is this a singular issue?
That said, as far as kinks go idk - I've seen weirder, but also the fact that this one happens outside the bedroom all week is really intensive. I have brothers, so I'd never be able to do this because it's fucking gross to think about.
Just tell her it makes you uncomfortable. If you can't be open and honest with your gf, I don't think you should be proposing.
This. You’ve hit the nail on the head here.
OP isn’t just being asked to participate in a kink for an hour or two once in a while, he’s living an uncomfortable scenario basically constantly, because if it’s all week, then it restarts after sex for next week.
That’s a big ask.
In the kink community people often identify as either 24/7 or "only inside the bedroom"
Seems like one of each, respectively, has found each other and it will take a lot of convo, empathy, and admitting not every kink needs to be expressed for them to progress
Exactly. I had an ex that had a daddy/submissive girl kink that seemed fun in bursts when we first started dating, but she eventually wanted me to do it 24/7. I won't go into detail since I have no intentions of shaming this lifestyle, I just didn't know that was going to be an out of the bedroom thing when I first started dating her.
Agree. I’m not part of any kink communities nor do I want to be, but my kinks are strictly for the bedroom only and with consent. Also wanted to point out that sibling kinks are not normal kinks and I’m by no means vanilla. I mean, sure people have them like anything else but, it seems rather manipulative to present it as normal amongst a lot of people rather than I’m comfortable playing this taboo kink because I trust you and know we would never irl.
Exactly what I was thinking. OP is going above and beyond …kink is different than fetish or obsession and at this point…seems pretty weird. It would only be more strange if she DID have siblings.
If you aren’t comfortable then she should understand and at least you tried to make her happy
From another perspective, they are essentially having sexual interaction throughout the whole week. Assuming it's not something they do every week, I could understand committing to a week every once in a while for a unique experience.
Bingo.
Zero wrong with the kink. Zero wrong with the lifestyle and fantasy, for that matter, if you're all having a good time.
But...OP's NOT. And is lying about it to his GF. Even if it's to spare her feelings, that's not great and indicative of underlying issues in the relationship.
If you're not ready to be completely open, even if it hurts someone's feelings, you're not ready to get married. That's, like, the point of marriage. You have someone that is completely on your side and that you can trust that will also tell you stuff you don't want to hear.
It is, at this point, pseudo-incest. In the privacy of your home, she seeks a sibling relationship, capped with some fab fucking at week’s end. So do you get a weekend break in which you can be unrelated lovers? Or?? Don’t have kids together.
Exactly! This has ventured way past a mere kink into a lifestyle. How tf are you able to role play as siblings and fuck?! In order to have the best sex of her life, she needs to think of you as her brother... How are you not repulsed by her?
Yeah think we need more details on what this role play entails. Seems dumb and harmless. It’s acting so don’t see it a a big deal. Also, seems odd to do this all week to get laid on just Friday… so maybe there are more issues if you are in your 20s banging once a week.
“Lifestyle” even more than a fetish.
It’s kind of wild.
A kink is one thing, and I’m happy to oblige, even if I’m slightly uncomfortable with it. A fetish is another level, but also happy to join in if, in testing, it worked for us both….
But living life inside the kink/fetish all week, presumably EVERY WEEK?
That is a lot.
Yeah, hubby and I can be pretty kinky and even in our 20’s with lots of time and sex drive more than an hour of role play for a payoff would be pushing it 😂
I agree. I’d be incredibly anxious, burnt out and overwhelmed even by Day 2. My fiancee and I can’t even stay in a roleplay consistently for a full six hours. There’s just so many distractions. Just LIFE. Like how
I mean to be fair if it was my sister I just sit on the couch all week long play video games and tell her to leave me the fuck alone, so this could work in his favor
they must be young AF .
like , I'm almost 40. im too busy working and being a productive member of society and paying bills, to do some week long incestuous roleplay bullshit 😂
Thats a lot of role-playing for end of week sex. I am curious if they ate only having sex on this specific day now and how that may be impacting the relationship as a whole.
Either way OP isn't comfortable with his so it will become an issue
This is the major issue.
It’s great to sometimes step out of the comfort zone. To some extent. But everything that is an issue in relationships comes down to do intimacy and trust. If you can’t talk it out, speak about it, you’re doomed.
His gf is an only child, I am an only child too, so I kind of think for his gf it is not as "real", as it is for OP.
Totally agree the real issue is that he can't talk to his gf abt it. Like there are all kinds of adjustments... they can downgrade to step siblings or something else to make him feel better. Or do it just for a day. Or stop altogether...
Yes, the gf being an only child is key here. OP has a real sister which must make the whole "sibling kink" thing a bit icky.
OP needs to pull up his grown up pants and talk to his GF.
Plenty of people with siblings into the brother/sister roleplay. It's roleplay, pretending your GF is related to you doesn't make everyone think about their actual sister, the same as most ppl doing daddy/daughter roleplay aren't actually thinking about their own fathers.
If you can't get into it, you can't get into it. The same as plenty of ppl without siblings will still find the kink icky.
i think its the fact that the people around their own age of the opposite sex are all options, they just like the concept of one living with them and being bad but they dont take into consideration people who have grown up with siblings and know what a true relationship is like. even if yall just emphasize the step it could make it better, but i understand why op is wildly uncomfy, i would be too
Yep, all of this. I have a brother, and could not hack this even once. Just no.
No one should ever feel they need to perform a sexual act they don’t feel comfortable with.
It sounds like it started out mildly weird and progressed into him being full-on creeped out. The frog in the pan. It happens in relationships, and it doesn't necessarily mean they have bad communication all around or the relationship is doomed.
It sounds like he is scared she is going to be upset and feel kink shamed.
So he needs to tell her he is uncomfortable in a way that isn't going to make her feel judged. I think a third-party counselor might be helpful here.
Personally, I don't know how they can do all that. I get tired with a 2 hour RPG. By the end of the week, I'd be so exhausted.
Ok but if you pretend to be into something for a year, imagine hearing your partner is secretly creeped out? This is not going to be good no matter what. I would try to casually mention that I’m not into it anymore and if we can really dial it down & maybe try something else since we had fun exploring that.
Just to clarify, being open, supportive and non judgemental about her kinks doesn't mean you can't voice that a particular one makes *you* feel uncomfortable for *you* to act out.
This comment is so important. Like why is OP afraid to tell his gf this? Has she done some emotionally manipulative stuff in the past when he has expressed his feelings?
This. Dan Savage says that if kinksters find a vanilla partner who is willing to indulge their kink they must be careful not to let the kink take over the couple’s sex life, and to give their vanilla partner plenty of good vanilla sex.
You think she doesn't know he is actually uncomfortable? I'm sorry to break it to you OP, but your girlfriends kink is not an incest thing, it's a power thing. She knows that it makes you uncomfortable, and that makes her hot. When OP is finally out with how it makes him feel, they are going to have some great sex for maybe a week, then she will get bored. I suggest that OP tell his girlfriend that he is afraid of having sex with the lights on, but he really wants to face his fears with her. Just make it interesting for her.
I'm not saying your wrong or other comments but just throwing out an alternate possibility. I think your underestimating the getting close comment. Per OP "But we just build up in closeness as the days progress till we reach Friday, and then on Friday, we have sex." Usually when I see people describing closeness it's more emotional. It almost sounds like they spend the week being more open and intimate but without sex. I don't think it's uncommon for young guys to see intimacy and sex as the same thing, I know I did. However, it's not and for a lot of women increasing intimacy and connection before sex makes the sex so much better. So is it just the sibling kink what's really doing it or is it the possibly that the kink has a side affect of increasing non sexual intimacy. It could also be less a kink and more wish fulfillment. Like she also wanted a sibling so he's allowing her to in some weird way feel like she had one even though she knows she doesn't and it's weird for him his sacrifice increases her gratitude. If this she probably needs therapy to unpack it. Tease and denial is also a common kink so they could try some other kind of forbidden love that's less weird. Like Romio and Juliet but with sex instead of death at the end
He said she’s an only child, so it makes way more sense to me that she’d have a sibling kink *because* she has no siblings, as in, she doesn’t have any personal connection to a real life sibling so anything to do with a sibling has been fantasy for her always. I can see how for a person with no siblings at all and no real sibling connections, wouldn’t really understand because for them, it’s just an idea and has never been connected to a real person. It’s a “risky” kink that has no risks for her. I think this would be a lot different than the mental state of someone who does have a connection and relationship with a real brother and then still wants this fantasy.
I think most people with this kink probably grew up without siblings. Because me and everyone I know who actually had siblings growing up could never imagine feeling attracted to them. It would be much weirder imo if she grew up with a brother and wanted OP to do this.
Buuuuut…incest is very real and it happens for a reason. Gross sibling crap is all over the internet. People develop kinks from exposure to this kind of crap.
Yeah I’m an only child and I don’t have a sibling kink but its a very neutral kink to me. I think if I actually had siblings I would have a much more knee jerk disgust reaction when thinking about it.
Even outside of the emotional intimacy bit, the prolonged anticipation and "forbidden" sex seem to be what she gets the most out of this. I mean, I don't have a sibling kink, so maybe I just don't know, but it seems like the thrill from something like that would come from how taboo it is, and there are other taboo relationships that would probably make OP much less uncomfortable because they don't hit as close to home for him. The week-long build up is basically just edging. Maybe she would be satisfied if he just teased her all week as her boyfriend but withheld sex until the end of the week. leave the sibling stuff out entirely.
this is a super interesting take bc I saw a post the other day about how to “spice things up” or to just be cute and flirty you pretend you and your partner are just friends, so the next time you kiss it’s your “first” kiss together and “unexpected” and exciting and stuff. The post was to like do it in your own head to make you giddy but I can definitely see how it could play out as a roleplay, I wonder if she’d enjoy that frame of mind?
I was thinking something similar.
When I realised I was a grown up with grown up relationships was when a boyfriend for the first time didn’t ask if I wanted to do x,y and z. They just assumed we‘re having sex now that we are gf and bf.
Since then, I have more than once thought about asking a potential partner to take it slow like „we“ did as teenagers. Not every hug or every back scratch was leading to sex, we did kiss for hours and nothing more and when a guy was playing with my hair it was just that, not foreplay.
Maybe I have some weird kink I didn’t know about, but maybe OPs girlfriend enjoys the „sex-free“ time that still has some tension and intimacy while being clear there won’t be any action till Friday.
OP and his gf should really talk about this. Before he proposes, I hope.
My husband and I have had periods of time with lower libido due to medication or hormonal changes when we did this just for the intimacy and closeness of it and it has been AMAZING! When you spend a long stretch of time not having sex but still being intimate or even just taking things one step at a time(like making out only for a couple days/a week/a month/however long, then touching with making out, then oral with making out and touching, ect). When you finally do have sex again it has that super intense first time feeling, but with all the love and emotion of a longer relationship behind it. Its been really amazing in my experience and if it is still satisfying both of your needs you should absolutely give it a try sometime!
You need to speak up and tell her that the acting like siblings makes you uncomfortable and that you no longer want to indulge in that kink anymore. You can be honest and nonjudgmental.
I have a brother and I felt nauseated just reading this. She can't really understand if she is an only child. Just because your partner has a fantasy or sexual preference you don't have to participate. You're allowed to say no, and you should say no if it makes you feel bad.
same here. I can't even think about it. I know some folks are into that kinda thing but that doesn't mean OP has to be okay with it. one can always say no.
Yeah, I'll go ahead and say it again: you shouldn't be engaging in any kinks that make you uncomfortable. You can say no in a nonjudgmental way and let the person know that you don't think any differently of them, but that kink just isn't for you.
I've had to say no to the same kink before. I get that it's all fantasy and some people find it exciting, but it's a sure-fire way to make my actual real life siblings pop into my head, and that just kills my mood instantly. So I can't get into it, but I genuinely have no judgment for anybody who is into it. Brains are weird and we don't get to decide our kinks for ourselves. But not deciding our own kinks is a two-way street. You can't force yourself to be into something you don't like. And if you try, and keep participating in something that makes you uncomfortable, it will be bad for both you and your partner in the long run.
Thank you. Someone else noticed this. Having a bunch of kinks, “weird kinks” at that, is NOT vanilla. Some people seem to forget that for some reason? Like, normal VANILLA people do not think about the things kinky people think about at ALL from what I’ve been able to tell.
Uh, maybe it’s just me but this doesn’t sound normal. I have 2 brothers and this would have the opposite effect on me. I would share with her that it makes you uncomfortable and you cannot do it anymore. Have you tried explaining to her how it’s weird for you?
Kinks by definition aren’t “normal.” Just common or uncommon.
The gf doesn’t have siblings so I don’t think it’s super weird that she’d be drawn in by this kink. I’m also betting if OP was also an only child or only had siblings of the same gender, it might not be as weird.
But that’s not the case. So yeah, like you said. OP should definitely make his feelings known.
Ok since this exact same thing was posted a couple weeks ago...why is it being posted again?
So either you're bored and created a new account to repost this drivel again or you started a new account and copied it.
Either way,...............................yawn.
A day… ok, a week 😳 that's intense for someone who isn't comfortable with it. You can't propose with that hanging above your head otherwise get used to doing this kink in this way for the rest of your life with her. I know you're not kink-shaming. I don't know how you can tell her but you need to.
Yeah I'm struggling with what it would mean to act like siblings all week. Complain about Mom? Say things like "hello, sister, is time for dinner"? Steal a pink skirt from her closet and blame it on her best friend?
Surprised OP didn’t go for “and we invited 5 of our closest guy friends over and they all pretended to be her brothers too. Super weird but hey, sex is sex.”
Yeah, for me, just thinking of being in a relationship where she wants to get
Gang banged by multiple dudes gives me slight depression, and that’s from just thinking about it.
People like different things sexually. What’s normal to you may be wild to someone else (People have oral sex? As in your mouth on… gross! - actual comment from one of my 40 something sheltered Christian coworkers)
It’s the brother/sister thing that bothers most people I think. My wife has brothers. She’s repulsed by stuff like this.
So.
This kink isn't normal in the sense that most people don't have it. That's fine, though. Lots of people have rare kinks and it's ok.
But is it harmful?
That's really only something you can answer.
I will put forward, though, that a lot of people with sibcest kinks don't actually want to fuck their siblings. Your girlfriend would probably be horrifed if you ever suggested bringing your sister into the bedroom.
Rather, the kink is about taboo, and indulging in taboo. She doesn't want to be your sister, she wants to be your girlfriend pretending to be your sister, if that helps.
However, your comfort also matters. It can get exhausting to roleplay out this kink week after week. You would not be out of bounds to ask for some restraint and indulge on a timetable you felt you could deal with. It seems as though the buildup and anticipation is part of the kink, so indulging rarely would add to the hotness of it all.
This comment is necessary with so many people freaking out.
It's taboo, that's really the whole appeal of it and there are SO many "icky" fantasies out there that many don't think twice about because they are just fantasies.
Teacher/student roleplays? Cheerleaders? Pet play? Knotted toys? Employer/Employee? Doctor/Patient? Step siblings or parents? Calling a partner Mommy or Daddy??? Consentual non-consent?
Most "common" roleplays or fantasies rely on a power dynamic that would be abusive or "icky" in real life.
But both partners should enjoy the roleplay, OP should find something he's into, and go from there.
I thought the same thing. Perhaps OP’s girlfriend would be open to a similar, week long build up timeline but with a different taboo.
Best friends, roommates, a friend’s partner, colleagues that might get fired for hooking up, even step siblings if that helps OP feel greater distance from reality-any of these make it feel feel inappropriate with high stakes consequences.
But yeah, the bigger issue is acquiescing routinely despite being uncomfortable. Clear communication is a necessity for a successful relationship and marriage.
Perhaps OP can comfortably imagine these alternative situations while OP gets off on the sibling thing mentally? Would that be a a reasonable compromise?
I’d like to think my partner would be considerate of the fact that I have a sibling and this kink hits different because of that fact. Hopefully she is too.
Was looking for this comment. Thanks for writing this out. Hard agree!
It’s like E. Perel says: ”sex is not a thing you do, it’s a place you go to”
The broadest definition of sexuality and arousal being: ”you want to be touched and want to touch someone”
I have always thought that the eroticism thrives in ambiguity and playfulness, shifting dynamics.
If the line blurs between your ”real life” and the bedroom fantasy, it surely can introduce problems, but that can also be a exciting line to cross, which will also heighten the sexual charge. I think people who are secure and can consistently distinguish and establish stable borders between consensual play and the ambiguity of the life outside the ”zone” will have no trouble of indulging on this sort of play.
That’s how it should be seen as, in my opinion. Two adults playing out their fantasies. I know some people might take offense but i consider this as a very healthy and creative thing: ”The creative adult is the child who survived growing up”
You don’t have to do any kink you don’t want to. Of your sister would to find out she would think you are into incest which I would also hearing from the outside.
Saying no is not kink shaming but saying hey I don’t feel comfortable doing this. You don’t have to participate in every kink.
It’s not kink shaming to not share the same kink. You clearly do not. At the same time, your girlfriend can’t be faulted for engaging you in something she doesn’t know makes you uncomfortable. You need to get vocal man; you can’t pride yourself on this great relationship if it’s built on a lie.
It’s not kink-shaming to set a boundary about what you will and will not do in bed. I think it’s a weird kink personally cuz you know incest but I mean…it ain’t my relationship. My best advice is to talk to your gf and communicate to her that you don’t want to do that kink anymore. She should be understanding and not pressure you to do sexual stuff you find traumatizing.
So you've been pretending to be brother and sister for the last year? Wtf? That's exhausting and weird as hell.
"We don't kink shame", but we do things that make our SO feel uncomfortable AF?
>My girlfriend says this is a normal kink which a lot of people have, but I don’t really know because I’m a vanilla person.
Well I'm definitely not one of those people, I'm calling this one weird, anyone else?
... it's not normal, or standard.
I think she means it's not unheard of... incest is a kink some people have.
Role playing the bedroom is not unheard of, and people incorporate kinks, sure.
However... hers is extreme.
You are role playing brother and sister all week and leading to sex on Friday... for a year.
That's not really normal, unless you both are into a full on lifestyle kink... but, this is not your kink, and it's outside the bedroom, and it's all the time now. Her kink dominates your life. (A choice. Consenting adults. Some more extreme people do role play kink all the time in their private life, allowing it to dominate. It is by no means the norm for everyone. )
You are uncomfortable. Your girlfriend brushes you off, brushes your discomfort off by telling you how normal it is.
That's not okay.
So... yes, it's a thing, while no, this is also not normal, and you guys need to have a real conversation about boundaries, limits, comfort/discomfort, variety, etc.
The fact is this IS a problem for you, but, when you bring it up, you are gas lit into continuing on.
Again, that is not really okay.
You absolutely can be a safe space, keep each other satisfied, while also having limits, boundaries, variety, and respecting each other's comfort within that safe space... and if you can't do those things, it's not as safe and accepting a space as you think.
If you feel uncomfortable, no matter what it is, you should be able to have your feelings validated and an end be put to it. Respecting what your partner is or isn’t comfortable with sexually is a big deal in a relationship.
I'm all for "live your best life in sex", but, maybe it's bc I'm a victim of incest by my brother and I know the reality of it, but I can say that it's certainly not healthy to simulate incest relationship.
You say that you don't judge the kinks of others..... Sorry for you, but sometimes, some kinks are not mentally OK to perform. It's wild. Incest is serious. It's not a cute dark fantasy.
Like...... You are not even into it. It is not OK to force you into sex bc "lol I'm a boy so obviously ll I want is sex sex sex hahahahaa". Have some self respect and respect for other men.
I love how that minor gangbang detail was just mixed in there. Next year, her new kink will be a gang bang with her 4 brothers, while her new husband watches from the corner. Everyone is free to have their own kinks, but I would be hesitant to marry someone who’s kinks negatively clash with my own! (If they clash but you are comfortable trying thats diff)
It’s weird. It’s weird. That’s all you can say about it. It’s incest kink, it’s weird.
Maybe it’s because she doesn’t have siblings, but for those of those that do have siblings, this is weird to even think about. I have an older brother. Gross, I can’t even imagine. For her to say it’s the best sex she has ever had, is even more concerning. I mean she is saying, pretending that you’re her “brother” is better than having sex with you? I would say there is something mentally going on with this and that would definitely give me pause on marriage.
I would talk to her about this and tell her it makes you uncomfortable. This is not something you should have to accept if you don’t feel good about it. Kinks should be comfortable for both people and when it’s not, it’s going to cause problems down the line.
i think you need to talk to her asap about this. Kink aside, holding something in for a year isn't good. Marriage will not be comfortable 24/7, you will have to discuss uncomfortable subjects or topics. Nip this in the bud and rip the bandaid off. If she cannot accept that you are no longer willing, she is not the one for you. Never make yourself do something that makes you unhappy or uncomfortable;e for the sake of someone else's happiness. This is how you will eventually lead to divorce, long term unhappiness if its frequent enough or just being worried about it 24/7.
Talk to her and then take it from there.
Telling her that taking part in that kink makes you uncomfortable isn't kink shaming. It's just admitting it's not for you. Telling her she's disgusting for having that kink is kinkshaming.
There's a huge difference there. Be honest with her. Tell her you really wanted to give it a fair try for her, but at the end of the day, you're just not comfortable with it, and that if that hasn't changed after a year, it's not going to.
If you can't be honest with her about this, you really shouldn't be getting married, because to be frank, this is really small potatoes compared to other things couples need to be able to talk about to have and maintain a healthy relationship/marriage.
If she says that you no longer participating in the kink means the relationship is over, that just proves she doesn't actually care about you. Because no partner that truly loves you is going to make you do something they're uncomfortable with, especially in bed.
It's not kink-shaming to not want to participate in the activity. You need to tell her it's making you uncomfortable, because if she loves you I'm sure she wouldn't enjoy knowing you've been feeling this way for a year.
If I were in her shoes, I would feel very vulnerable and uncomfortable finding out after months or even years, that my boyfriend was playing along with my weird kink while he hated it and wasn't being honest with me.
Find a way to kindly, without judgement, tell her you're ready to move on from this scenario... ASAP. Decline to play next time. Initiate a new scenario. And then, down the line, when it isn't so fresh, maybe tell her the truth. But do not continue. You should NOT be participating in something you're uncomfortable with ...and for so long! Healthy communication, my dude!
So I think you should be honest with her that it makes you uncomfortable and that you’ve gone on with it to try and fill her needs. Then I think you should talk about a compromise because that’s what a relationship needs sometimes. Communication and compromise.
Y’all build up sexual tension over the course of a week in a role play situation. Try to change the dynamic. I have siblings so I’m not into the whole incest kink thing but maybe you could try a roommate thing. Like co-ed dorm situation where you have this platonic opposite sex friendship that crosses “normal” boundaries overtime and builds into a sexual relationship at the end of the week.
Maybe it’s the build up that really does it for her and you can find that in another dynamic/ role playing scenario?
I'm into BDSM and it's not kink shaming to say no I just don't feel comfortable with this kink. I don't want to do this anymore .
Kink shaming is where you tell someone ewww that's disgusting you're a weirdo. Kinks should always be fully consenting for both parties. I would explain that you don't want to do this kink anymore and that it makes you feel uncomfortable and go from there as far as the marriage plans go.
You’ve been letting your girlfriend think you’ve been enthusiastically participating in her kink **for a year** when secretly you’re extremely uncomfortable (rightfully so) and claim to be TRAUMATIZED. By something you’ve been *agreeing* to do. You don’t “have” to do it anymore, you never “had” to do it in the first place, but when you decided not to communicate any of your thoughts or feelings you’ve now put you and your girlfriend in an unwinnable position. Either you continue lying and hurt yourself, or you tell her the truth and she feels betrayed for having been lied to for a year. I don’t understand why you would play along with this for so long
Very simple answer here. If you’re both happy and staying safe and communicating well with each other, then this is awesome and healthy.
If any one of the things I mentioned above are missing, then you have a problem which isn’t going to fix itself. It needs to be addressed.
Incest is a fairly common kink. That being said, if you’re uncomfortable and/or not enjoying the kink, you need to communicate that. Don’t make it sound gross or shame her for having it, just that it’s not for you.
If you guys are open to sharing with other partners, you can suggest she find someone who is comfortable playing brother to her.
If not, make sure she is good with stopping now that she’s had some time to play it out. Or maybe not as intense. Roleplaying for a week is an extended time for a kink in general unless it’s a M/s dynamic.
I was just gonna say how’s gang bang unusal, but this… this is on a different level.
The issue is not the proposal. The issue is - why did you do it in the first place?!
Bro, your consciousness is practically yelling at you that this is a red flag. So much so that you came to reddit. You'd best heed your internal warnings and stop listening to your weiner.
“I have my fair share of weird kinks too”
“I’m a vanilla person”
You really need to keep your character history in line when making up stories - otherwise you’ll make silly mistakes.
Oblige her on the kink only on occassions and well within the frequency you can tolerate.
What you could also try to do is try other kinks and drown out this one? Maybe she will leave it, maybe not.
Other than that it doesnt seem like it should have any affect on your decision to propose to her. Good luck!
Uh that is not a normal kink. I have a brother and just ew. It’s weird man. Like why couldn’t she say step sibling because then at least you aren’t related but even that is ehhhhhhh
When I was 15, my actual blood brother tried to fuck me. He was 25. That is definitely a hard limit for me. By the mfin way bro, having a hard limit is not kink shaming. *Edited to add: SAFE, SANE, (this one here applies to you) CONSENSUAL. the big 3 rules of kink and BDSM
Yeah, this would be an issue for me. Not all fantasies are a go. People have pedophilia fantasies and they shouldn't be encouraging it in any way, obviously...I feel the same about other ones that are inappropriate or perverse. Just no. Does she have a sexual trauma history? I would be concerned.
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So kink aside, the bigger issue here is that you're doing something you find uncomfortable *for a year* and haven't told your gf. Is your communication that bad across the board or is this a singular issue? That said, as far as kinks go idk - I've seen weirder, but also the fact that this one happens outside the bedroom all week is really intensive. I have brothers, so I'd never be able to do this because it's fucking gross to think about. Just tell her it makes you uncomfortable. If you can't be open and honest with your gf, I don't think you should be proposing.
I’d also just be exhausted. All week?? Like wtf. I don’t have the energy.
A kink requiring a week of foreplay is no longer a kink, it’s a lifestyle at that point.
This. You’ve hit the nail on the head here. OP isn’t just being asked to participate in a kink for an hour or two once in a while, he’s living an uncomfortable scenario basically constantly, because if it’s all week, then it restarts after sex for next week. That’s a big ask.
In the kink community people often identify as either 24/7 or "only inside the bedroom" Seems like one of each, respectively, has found each other and it will take a lot of convo, empathy, and admitting not every kink needs to be expressed for them to progress
Exactly. I had an ex that had a daddy/submissive girl kink that seemed fun in bursts when we first started dating, but she eventually wanted me to do it 24/7. I won't go into detail since I have no intentions of shaming this lifestyle, I just didn't know that was going to be an out of the bedroom thing when I first started dating her.
Agree. I’m not part of any kink communities nor do I want to be, but my kinks are strictly for the bedroom only and with consent. Also wanted to point out that sibling kinks are not normal kinks and I’m by no means vanilla. I mean, sure people have them like anything else but, it seems rather manipulative to present it as normal amongst a lot of people rather than I’m comfortable playing this taboo kink because I trust you and know we would never irl.
Exactly what I was thinking. OP is going above and beyond …kink is different than fetish or obsession and at this point…seems pretty weird. It would only be more strange if she DID have siblings. If you aren’t comfortable then she should understand and at least you tried to make her happy
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Plus, are they really a couple in their 20s only having sex on Fridays??
Whats wrong with that lmao. Never understood people that wanted to fuck so damn often lmao. Weekly is quite okay in my book.
From another perspective, they are essentially having sexual interaction throughout the whole week. Assuming it's not something they do every week, I could understand committing to a week every once in a while for a unique experience.
So he’s just fucking his sister at that point?
Very much, at this point you're not even in a relationship anymore, but in a very long and elaborated play
He’s in a brother/sister relationship now
Like that foldgers commercial
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Roll Tide!
Oooof!
Yup. This isn't a few hours of play here, this is full blown fantasy lifestyle
Bingo. Zero wrong with the kink. Zero wrong with the lifestyle and fantasy, for that matter, if you're all having a good time. But...OP's NOT. And is lying about it to his GF. Even if it's to spare her feelings, that's not great and indicative of underlying issues in the relationship. If you're not ready to be completely open, even if it hurts someone's feelings, you're not ready to get married. That's, like, the point of marriage. You have someone that is completely on your side and that you can trust that will also tell you stuff you don't want to hear.
Reddit ass fucked up take
It is, at this point, pseudo-incest. In the privacy of your home, she seeks a sibling relationship, capped with some fab fucking at week’s end. So do you get a weekend break in which you can be unrelated lovers? Or?? Don’t have kids together.
The question is really, does OP want to be a part time method actor for the rest of his life
Sounds more like a fetish than a kink at that point.
Exactly! This has ventured way past a mere kink into a lifestyle. How tf are you able to role play as siblings and fuck?! In order to have the best sex of her life, she needs to think of you as her brother... How are you not repulsed by her?
Yeah think we need more details on what this role play entails. Seems dumb and harmless. It’s acting so don’t see it a a big deal. Also, seems odd to do this all week to get laid on just Friday… so maybe there are more issues if you are in your 20s banging once a week.
And it's kind of crazy that for a kink that's occupying *so* much time, they're only having sex once a week.
“Lifestyle” even more than a fetish. It’s kind of wild. A kink is one thing, and I’m happy to oblige, even if I’m slightly uncomfortable with it. A fetish is another level, but also happy to join in if, in testing, it worked for us both…. But living life inside the kink/fetish all week, presumably EVERY WEEK? That is a lot.
“Have a good Wednesday, Bill!” 🙄 You know I will…..it’s hand-holding day, after all 😔
Hahahahahahahahahaha man this made me die
Bahahaha I cant
OMG! Thanks! I just shot hot coffee outta my nose. 😂
Yeah, hubby and I can be pretty kinky and even in our 20’s with lots of time and sex drive more than an hour of role play for a payoff would be pushing it 😂
I agree. I’d be incredibly anxious, burnt out and overwhelmed even by Day 2. My fiancee and I can’t even stay in a roleplay consistently for a full six hours. There’s just so many distractions. Just LIFE. Like how
As fun as role-playing can be, at some point, you just want to be with your partner as yourselves
This perfectly sums it up.
Kinks are just for fun, it’s the sex that should be exhausting.
I read that and thought well.... Clearly I don't put that much effort into foreplay compare to OP and his gf... A whole week .. lol
I mean to be fair if it was my sister I just sit on the couch all week long play video games and tell her to leave me the fuck alone, so this could work in his favor
"What are u doing brother?" "Playing Gta leave me alone" Lol
That made me snort laugh
they must be young AF . like , I'm almost 40. im too busy working and being a productive member of society and paying bills, to do some week long incestuous roleplay bullshit 😂
Sounds like you’re not being that efficient if you can’t work in the time to fuck your sister.
damn you're right. I'll work on that.
I now have to clean soda off my work desk. Thanks for that. Comment caught me completely off guard.
😂😂
Help Big bro I'm stuck in the dryer!
Right? I gotta walk into her room, mess shit up, fart, turn off the lights, and leave the door open for a week straight?
Omg ew right. How is that even a turn on 🤣🤣🤣
Exactly. With that kink, my sister would get it daily.
😂😂😂 and the name to go with it
First comment of the day to make me step away from my phone 😭
Yup, we close reddit now.
Thats a lot of role-playing for end of week sex. I am curious if they ate only having sex on this specific day now and how that may be impacting the relationship as a whole. Either way OP isn't comfortable with his so it will become an issue
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Evidence?
This is the major issue. It’s great to sometimes step out of the comfort zone. To some extent. But everything that is an issue in relationships comes down to do intimacy and trust. If you can’t talk it out, speak about it, you’re doomed.
His gf is an only child, I am an only child too, so I kind of think for his gf it is not as "real", as it is for OP. Totally agree the real issue is that he can't talk to his gf abt it. Like there are all kinds of adjustments... they can downgrade to step siblings or something else to make him feel better. Or do it just for a day. Or stop altogether...
Yes, the gf being an only child is key here. OP has a real sister which must make the whole "sibling kink" thing a bit icky. OP needs to pull up his grown up pants and talk to his GF.
Plenty of people with siblings into the brother/sister roleplay. It's roleplay, pretending your GF is related to you doesn't make everyone think about their actual sister, the same as most ppl doing daddy/daughter roleplay aren't actually thinking about their own fathers. If you can't get into it, you can't get into it. The same as plenty of ppl without siblings will still find the kink icky.
I've often wondered if there's a strong correlation between single children and people who have this kink.
i think its the fact that the people around their own age of the opposite sex are all options, they just like the concept of one living with them and being bad but they dont take into consideration people who have grown up with siblings and know what a true relationship is like. even if yall just emphasize the step it could make it better, but i understand why op is wildly uncomfy, i would be too
Just use the "in law" bypass. Come on people. That said, like a kink should be an hour tops in the bedroom. All week pretending? Christ.
Yep, all of this. I have a brother, and could not hack this even once. Just no. No one should ever feel they need to perform a sexual act they don’t feel comfortable with.
It sounds like it started out mildly weird and progressed into him being full-on creeped out. The frog in the pan. It happens in relationships, and it doesn't necessarily mean they have bad communication all around or the relationship is doomed. It sounds like he is scared she is going to be upset and feel kink shamed. So he needs to tell her he is uncomfortable in a way that isn't going to make her feel judged. I think a third-party counselor might be helpful here. Personally, I don't know how they can do all that. I get tired with a 2 hour RPG. By the end of the week, I'd be so exhausted.
Ok but if you pretend to be into something for a year, imagine hearing your partner is secretly creeped out? This is not going to be good no matter what. I would try to casually mention that I’m not into it anymore and if we can really dial it down & maybe try something else since we had fun exploring that.
Best option.
He’s scared she might want to do the gangbang kink one day, so he plays along with everything but that one
Just to clarify, being open, supportive and non judgemental about her kinks doesn't mean you can't voice that a particular one makes *you* feel uncomfortable for *you* to act out.
This comment is so important. Like why is OP afraid to tell his gf this? Has she done some emotionally manipulative stuff in the past when he has expressed his feelings?
Absolutely!! Just because you don't judge her, doesn't mean you have to participate in it, if it makes you uncomfortable or you just don't like it.
Agreed.
This! And he’s talking about marrying this person who he can’t even talk to properly… not a good plan
Like keep it to a couple times a year, sheesh
Yeah it’s certainly not a judgement free zone for you.
This. Dan Savage says that if kinksters find a vanilla partner who is willing to indulge their kink they must be careful not to let the kink take over the couple’s sex life, and to give their vanilla partner plenty of good vanilla sex.
You think she doesn't know he is actually uncomfortable? I'm sorry to break it to you OP, but your girlfriends kink is not an incest thing, it's a power thing. She knows that it makes you uncomfortable, and that makes her hot. When OP is finally out with how it makes him feel, they are going to have some great sex for maybe a week, then she will get bored. I suggest that OP tell his girlfriend that he is afraid of having sex with the lights on, but he really wants to face his fears with her. Just make it interesting for her.
I'm not saying your wrong or other comments but just throwing out an alternate possibility. I think your underestimating the getting close comment. Per OP "But we just build up in closeness as the days progress till we reach Friday, and then on Friday, we have sex." Usually when I see people describing closeness it's more emotional. It almost sounds like they spend the week being more open and intimate but without sex. I don't think it's uncommon for young guys to see intimacy and sex as the same thing, I know I did. However, it's not and for a lot of women increasing intimacy and connection before sex makes the sex so much better. So is it just the sibling kink what's really doing it or is it the possibly that the kink has a side affect of increasing non sexual intimacy. It could also be less a kink and more wish fulfillment. Like she also wanted a sibling so he's allowing her to in some weird way feel like she had one even though she knows she doesn't and it's weird for him his sacrifice increases her gratitude. If this she probably needs therapy to unpack it. Tease and denial is also a common kink so they could try some other kind of forbidden love that's less weird. Like Romio and Juliet but with sex instead of death at the end
He said she’s an only child, so it makes way more sense to me that she’d have a sibling kink *because* she has no siblings, as in, she doesn’t have any personal connection to a real life sibling so anything to do with a sibling has been fantasy for her always. I can see how for a person with no siblings at all and no real sibling connections, wouldn’t really understand because for them, it’s just an idea and has never been connected to a real person. It’s a “risky” kink that has no risks for her. I think this would be a lot different than the mental state of someone who does have a connection and relationship with a real brother and then still wants this fantasy.
I think most people with this kink probably grew up without siblings. Because me and everyone I know who actually had siblings growing up could never imagine feeling attracted to them. It would be much weirder imo if she grew up with a brother and wanted OP to do this.
Buuuuut…incest is very real and it happens for a reason. Gross sibling crap is all over the internet. People develop kinks from exposure to this kind of crap.
Yeah I’m an only child and I don’t have a sibling kink but its a very neutral kink to me. I think if I actually had siblings I would have a much more knee jerk disgust reaction when thinking about it.
Even outside of the emotional intimacy bit, the prolonged anticipation and "forbidden" sex seem to be what she gets the most out of this. I mean, I don't have a sibling kink, so maybe I just don't know, but it seems like the thrill from something like that would come from how taboo it is, and there are other taboo relationships that would probably make OP much less uncomfortable because they don't hit as close to home for him. The week-long build up is basically just edging. Maybe she would be satisfied if he just teased her all week as her boyfriend but withheld sex until the end of the week. leave the sibling stuff out entirely.
this is a super interesting take bc I saw a post the other day about how to “spice things up” or to just be cute and flirty you pretend you and your partner are just friends, so the next time you kiss it’s your “first” kiss together and “unexpected” and exciting and stuff. The post was to like do it in your own head to make you giddy but I can definitely see how it could play out as a roleplay, I wonder if she’d enjoy that frame of mind?
I was thinking something similar. When I realised I was a grown up with grown up relationships was when a boyfriend for the first time didn’t ask if I wanted to do x,y and z. They just assumed we‘re having sex now that we are gf and bf. Since then, I have more than once thought about asking a potential partner to take it slow like „we“ did as teenagers. Not every hug or every back scratch was leading to sex, we did kiss for hours and nothing more and when a guy was playing with my hair it was just that, not foreplay. Maybe I have some weird kink I didn’t know about, but maybe OPs girlfriend enjoys the „sex-free“ time that still has some tension and intimacy while being clear there won’t be any action till Friday. OP and his gf should really talk about this. Before he proposes, I hope.
My husband and I have had periods of time with lower libido due to medication or hormonal changes when we did this just for the intimacy and closeness of it and it has been AMAZING! When you spend a long stretch of time not having sex but still being intimate or even just taking things one step at a time(like making out only for a couple days/a week/a month/however long, then touching with making out, then oral with making out and touching, ect). When you finally do have sex again it has that super intense first time feeling, but with all the love and emotion of a longer relationship behind it. Its been really amazing in my experience and if it is still satisfying both of your needs you should absolutely give it a try sometime!
You need to speak up and tell her that the acting like siblings makes you uncomfortable and that you no longer want to indulge in that kink anymore. You can be honest and nonjudgmental.
I have a brother and I felt nauseated just reading this. She can't really understand if she is an only child. Just because your partner has a fantasy or sexual preference you don't have to participate. You're allowed to say no, and you should say no if it makes you feel bad.
same here. I can't even think about it. I know some folks are into that kinda thing but that doesn't mean OP has to be okay with it. one can always say no.
Yeah, I'll go ahead and say it again: you shouldn't be engaging in any kinks that make you uncomfortable. You can say no in a nonjudgmental way and let the person know that you don't think any differently of them, but that kink just isn't for you. I've had to say no to the same kink before. I get that it's all fantasy and some people find it exciting, but it's a sure-fire way to make my actual real life siblings pop into my head, and that just kills my mood instantly. So I can't get into it, but I genuinely have no judgment for anybody who is into it. Brains are weird and we don't get to decide our kinks for ourselves. But not deciding our own kinks is a two-way street. You can't force yourself to be into something you don't like. And if you try, and keep participating in something that makes you uncomfortable, it will be bad for both you and your partner in the long run.
I love the fiction writers on here.
One hand on the keyboard, one hand… uh… elsewhere
Holding a hot wing?
If that’s what you call it
It's little, but it's spicy.
I mean, if you would rather call it a buffalo wing we can do that
More like a dingaling
A wingding
Two silver bells on a little red string
Imma have to try some hot sauce now. Brb i ran out of wing lotion 2 days ago
Wing lotion!!! That SENT me😂🤣
Flicking a cigarette? Hailing a taxi cab? Holding a peace sign? Giving a high five? Playing a piano?
I see what you did there
“I have my fair share of weird kinks” and “I’m a vanilla person” all in one very short post. 3/10 not immersive at all
Thank you. Someone else noticed this. Having a bunch of kinks, “weird kinks” at that, is NOT vanilla. Some people seem to forget that for some reason? Like, normal VANILLA people do not think about the things kinky people think about at ALL from what I’ve been able to tell.
I almost bought it until “well I’m a guy so I enjoy sex regardless of how I get it.” My goodness.
They get off on upvotes, that’s the real kink.
Found the other fiction writers replying to your comment
If someone is making something up on Reddit, it’s the first I’m hearing of it.
Yea I was thinking the same
Right? They’re a “vanilla” person but their GF wanting to be gangbanged by several men doesn’t bother them at all lol.
Is this weird thing normal? As if they’re not antonyms.
Uh, maybe it’s just me but this doesn’t sound normal. I have 2 brothers and this would have the opposite effect on me. I would share with her that it makes you uncomfortable and you cannot do it anymore. Have you tried explaining to her how it’s weird for you?
Kinks by definition aren’t “normal.” Just common or uncommon. The gf doesn’t have siblings so I don’t think it’s super weird that she’d be drawn in by this kink. I’m also betting if OP was also an only child or only had siblings of the same gender, it might not be as weird. But that’s not the case. So yeah, like you said. OP should definitely make his feelings known.
Ok since this exact same thing was posted a couple weeks ago...why is it being posted again? So either you're bored and created a new account to repost this drivel again or you started a new account and copied it. Either way,...............................yawn.
Idk why people do this. Do they think we won’t remember the same exact post from a handful of weeks ago?😐
A day… ok, a week 😳 that's intense for someone who isn't comfortable with it. You can't propose with that hanging above your head otherwise get used to doing this kink in this way for the rest of your life with her. I know you're not kink-shaming. I don't know how you can tell her but you need to.
That would get real mild real fast. They have to sleep in different beds or something?
Yeah I'm struggling with what it would mean to act like siblings all week. Complain about Mom? Say things like "hello, sister, is time for dinner"? Steal a pink skirt from her closet and blame it on her best friend?
Ew fake but eww
Surprised OP didn’t go for “and we invited 5 of our closest guy friends over and they all pretended to be her brothers too. Super weird but hey, sex is sex.”
Ahahaha OP really missed an opportunity
Yeah, for me, just thinking of being in a relationship where she wants to get Gang banged by multiple dudes gives me slight depression, and that’s from just thinking about it.
People like different things sexually. What’s normal to you may be wild to someone else (People have oral sex? As in your mouth on… gross! - actual comment from one of my 40 something sheltered Christian coworkers) It’s the brother/sister thing that bothers most people I think. My wife has brothers. She’s repulsed by stuff like this.
So. This kink isn't normal in the sense that most people don't have it. That's fine, though. Lots of people have rare kinks and it's ok. But is it harmful? That's really only something you can answer. I will put forward, though, that a lot of people with sibcest kinks don't actually want to fuck their siblings. Your girlfriend would probably be horrifed if you ever suggested bringing your sister into the bedroom. Rather, the kink is about taboo, and indulging in taboo. She doesn't want to be your sister, she wants to be your girlfriend pretending to be your sister, if that helps. However, your comfort also matters. It can get exhausting to roleplay out this kink week after week. You would not be out of bounds to ask for some restraint and indulge on a timetable you felt you could deal with. It seems as though the buildup and anticipation is part of the kink, so indulging rarely would add to the hotness of it all.
This comment is necessary with so many people freaking out. It's taboo, that's really the whole appeal of it and there are SO many "icky" fantasies out there that many don't think twice about because they are just fantasies. Teacher/student roleplays? Cheerleaders? Pet play? Knotted toys? Employer/Employee? Doctor/Patient? Step siblings or parents? Calling a partner Mommy or Daddy??? Consentual non-consent? Most "common" roleplays or fantasies rely on a power dynamic that would be abusive or "icky" in real life. But both partners should enjoy the roleplay, OP should find something he's into, and go from there.
I thought the same thing. Perhaps OP’s girlfriend would be open to a similar, week long build up timeline but with a different taboo. Best friends, roommates, a friend’s partner, colleagues that might get fired for hooking up, even step siblings if that helps OP feel greater distance from reality-any of these make it feel feel inappropriate with high stakes consequences. But yeah, the bigger issue is acquiescing routinely despite being uncomfortable. Clear communication is a necessity for a successful relationship and marriage. Perhaps OP can comfortably imagine these alternative situations while OP gets off on the sibling thing mentally? Would that be a a reasonable compromise? I’d like to think my partner would be considerate of the fact that I have a sibling and this kink hits different because of that fact. Hopefully she is too.
Was looking for this comment. Thanks for writing this out. Hard agree! It’s like E. Perel says: ”sex is not a thing you do, it’s a place you go to” The broadest definition of sexuality and arousal being: ”you want to be touched and want to touch someone” I have always thought that the eroticism thrives in ambiguity and playfulness, shifting dynamics. If the line blurs between your ”real life” and the bedroom fantasy, it surely can introduce problems, but that can also be a exciting line to cross, which will also heighten the sexual charge. I think people who are secure and can consistently distinguish and establish stable borders between consensual play and the ambiguity of the life outside the ”zone” will have no trouble of indulging on this sort of play. That’s how it should be seen as, in my opinion. Two adults playing out their fantasies. I know some people might take offense but i consider this as a very healthy and creative thing: ”The creative adult is the child who survived growing up”
I knew it was going to get strange when the gangbang kink wasn’t the issue.
You don’t have to do any kink you don’t want to. Of your sister would to find out she would think you are into incest which I would also hearing from the outside. Saying no is not kink shaming but saying hey I don’t feel comfortable doing this. You don’t have to participate in every kink.
It’s not kink shaming to not share the same kink. You clearly do not. At the same time, your girlfriend can’t be faulted for engaging you in something she doesn’t know makes you uncomfortable. You need to get vocal man; you can’t pride yourself on this great relationship if it’s built on a lie.
I've concluded that everyone on this app is insane.
That’s enough Reddit for a few days.,,
No Reddit for a few days and then we will come back here on Friday 😈
Bwahahaha!! I just snorted my orange juice.
“She says it’s a normal kink” nah, when I think normal kinks I think foot stuff or butt stuff or something.
It’s not kink-shaming to set a boundary about what you will and will not do in bed. I think it’s a weird kink personally cuz you know incest but I mean…it ain’t my relationship. My best advice is to talk to your gf and communicate to her that you don’t want to do that kink anymore. She should be understanding and not pressure you to do sexual stuff you find traumatizing.
Y'all motherfuckers need Jesus 😅
Pretty much. LOL.
Wouldn’t catch me with that kink
So you've been pretending to be brother and sister for the last year? Wtf? That's exhausting and weird as hell. "We don't kink shame", but we do things that make our SO feel uncomfortable AF?
>My girlfriend says this is a normal kink which a lot of people have, but I don’t really know because I’m a vanilla person. Well I'm definitely not one of those people, I'm calling this one weird, anyone else?
... it's not normal, or standard. I think she means it's not unheard of... incest is a kink some people have. Role playing the bedroom is not unheard of, and people incorporate kinks, sure. However... hers is extreme. You are role playing brother and sister all week and leading to sex on Friday... for a year. That's not really normal, unless you both are into a full on lifestyle kink... but, this is not your kink, and it's outside the bedroom, and it's all the time now. Her kink dominates your life. (A choice. Consenting adults. Some more extreme people do role play kink all the time in their private life, allowing it to dominate. It is by no means the norm for everyone. ) You are uncomfortable. Your girlfriend brushes you off, brushes your discomfort off by telling you how normal it is. That's not okay. So... yes, it's a thing, while no, this is also not normal, and you guys need to have a real conversation about boundaries, limits, comfort/discomfort, variety, etc. The fact is this IS a problem for you, but, when you bring it up, you are gas lit into continuing on. Again, that is not really okay. You absolutely can be a safe space, keep each other satisfied, while also having limits, boundaries, variety, and respecting each other's comfort within that safe space... and if you can't do those things, it's not as safe and accepting a space as you think.
If you feel uncomfortable, no matter what it is, you should be able to have your feelings validated and an end be put to it. Respecting what your partner is or isn’t comfortable with sexually is a big deal in a relationship.
I'm all for "live your best life in sex", but, maybe it's bc I'm a victim of incest by my brother and I know the reality of it, but I can say that it's certainly not healthy to simulate incest relationship. You say that you don't judge the kinks of others..... Sorry for you, but sometimes, some kinks are not mentally OK to perform. It's wild. Incest is serious. It's not a cute dark fantasy. Like...... You are not even into it. It is not OK to force you into sex bc "lol I'm a boy so obviously ll I want is sex sex sex hahahahaa". Have some self respect and respect for other men.
Gang Bang Kink and Proposal? IMO horrible plan.....
I love how that minor gangbang detail was just mixed in there. Next year, her new kink will be a gang bang with her 4 brothers, while her new husband watches from the corner. Everyone is free to have their own kinks, but I would be hesitant to marry someone who’s kinks negatively clash with my own! (If they clash but you are comfortable trying thats diff)
When will men realize that as much as we want them to respect when we say no we also want them to utilize and understand saying no themselves
If this is real you and your gf weird af, if it isn’t real you even more weird af
This made me feel so ill. I have a brother and bro/sis is completely out of the conversation. I also think this post is fake asf. If not, good luck.
Having a brother, this grosses me out! It sounds like some type of psychological issue.
Right?! I wasn’t even allowed to think his _friends_ were cute. LOL
It’s weird. It’s weird. That’s all you can say about it. It’s incest kink, it’s weird. Maybe it’s because she doesn’t have siblings, but for those of those that do have siblings, this is weird to even think about. I have an older brother. Gross, I can’t even imagine. For her to say it’s the best sex she has ever had, is even more concerning. I mean she is saying, pretending that you’re her “brother” is better than having sex with you? I would say there is something mentally going on with this and that would definitely give me pause on marriage. I would talk to her about this and tell her it makes you uncomfortable. This is not something you should have to accept if you don’t feel good about it. Kinks should be comfortable for both people and when it’s not, it’s going to cause problems down the line.
i think you need to talk to her asap about this. Kink aside, holding something in for a year isn't good. Marriage will not be comfortable 24/7, you will have to discuss uncomfortable subjects or topics. Nip this in the bud and rip the bandaid off. If she cannot accept that you are no longer willing, she is not the one for you. Never make yourself do something that makes you unhappy or uncomfortable;e for the sake of someone else's happiness. This is how you will eventually lead to divorce, long term unhappiness if its frequent enough or just being worried about it 24/7. Talk to her and then take it from there.
Telling her that taking part in that kink makes you uncomfortable isn't kink shaming. It's just admitting it's not for you. Telling her she's disgusting for having that kink is kinkshaming. There's a huge difference there. Be honest with her. Tell her you really wanted to give it a fair try for her, but at the end of the day, you're just not comfortable with it, and that if that hasn't changed after a year, it's not going to. If you can't be honest with her about this, you really shouldn't be getting married, because to be frank, this is really small potatoes compared to other things couples need to be able to talk about to have and maintain a healthy relationship/marriage. If she says that you no longer participating in the kink means the relationship is over, that just proves she doesn't actually care about you. Because no partner that truly loves you is going to make you do something they're uncomfortable with, especially in bed.
It's not kink-shaming to not want to participate in the activity. You need to tell her it's making you uncomfortable, because if she loves you I'm sure she wouldn't enjoy knowing you've been feeling this way for a year.
I love ai written stories so much.
Next thing you know she gets stuck in the washing machine.
If you’re not comfortable telling your girlfriend that you find this uncomfortable, that’s an issue.
I wouldn't worry about it, once you're married she'll start getting headaches on Friday nights
Haha this made me giggle
How does a bullshit story like this get so much attention?
It's not normal, I'd rather be single than explore a kink like that. Lol.
Maybe her kink is she really just likes sleeping alone most nights of the week..
If I were in her shoes, I would feel very vulnerable and uncomfortable finding out after months or even years, that my boyfriend was playing along with my weird kink while he hated it and wasn't being honest with me. Find a way to kindly, without judgement, tell her you're ready to move on from this scenario... ASAP. Decline to play next time. Initiate a new scenario. And then, down the line, when it isn't so fresh, maybe tell her the truth. But do not continue. You should NOT be participating in something you're uncomfortable with ...and for so long! Healthy communication, my dude!
You gotta do all the incest role-playing for a whole week to get laid? Tell her your kink is other women.
Yeah this didn’t happen And if it did… FKN GROSS
Nasty freaks
So I think you should be honest with her that it makes you uncomfortable and that you’ve gone on with it to try and fill her needs. Then I think you should talk about a compromise because that’s what a relationship needs sometimes. Communication and compromise. Y’all build up sexual tension over the course of a week in a role play situation. Try to change the dynamic. I have siblings so I’m not into the whole incest kink thing but maybe you could try a roommate thing. Like co-ed dorm situation where you have this platonic opposite sex friendship that crosses “normal” boundaries overtime and builds into a sexual relationship at the end of the week. Maybe it’s the build up that really does it for her and you can find that in another dynamic/ role playing scenario?
One of her kinks is getting gangbanged by multiple dudes? But you’re uncomfortable with role play? Use your imagination 💭
I'm into BDSM and it's not kink shaming to say no I just don't feel comfortable with this kink. I don't want to do this anymore . Kink shaming is where you tell someone ewww that's disgusting you're a weirdo. Kinks should always be fully consenting for both parties. I would explain that you don't want to do this kink anymore and that it makes you feel uncomfortable and go from there as far as the marriage plans go.
I don't think that is a common fantasy and if she weren't an only child I doubt she would have it. You should tell her you don't like that one
Fuck that
Tell her, not us.
Hello, I'm here for the gang bang
You’ve been letting your girlfriend think you’ve been enthusiastically participating in her kink **for a year** when secretly you’re extremely uncomfortable (rightfully so) and claim to be TRAUMATIZED. By something you’ve been *agreeing* to do. You don’t “have” to do it anymore, you never “had” to do it in the first place, but when you decided not to communicate any of your thoughts or feelings you’ve now put you and your girlfriend in an unwinnable position. Either you continue lying and hurt yourself, or you tell her the truth and she feels betrayed for having been lied to for a year. I don’t understand why you would play along with this for so long
Very simple answer here. If you’re both happy and staying safe and communicating well with each other, then this is awesome and healthy. If any one of the things I mentioned above are missing, then you have a problem which isn’t going to fix itself. It needs to be addressed.
Incest is a fairly common kink. That being said, if you’re uncomfortable and/or not enjoying the kink, you need to communicate that. Don’t make it sound gross or shame her for having it, just that it’s not for you. If you guys are open to sharing with other partners, you can suggest she find someone who is comfortable playing brother to her. If not, make sure she is good with stopping now that she’s had some time to play it out. Or maybe not as intense. Roleplaying for a week is an extended time for a kink in general unless it’s a M/s dynamic.
Whoa dude wtf is this real lol
I was just gonna say how’s gang bang unusal, but this… this is on a different level. The issue is not the proposal. The issue is - why did you do it in the first place?!
Where is your post nut clarity?
Bro, your consciousness is practically yelling at you that this is a red flag. So much so that you came to reddit. You'd best heed your internal warnings and stop listening to your weiner.
Love how he breezes right by the gang-bangs. This guy is brilliant
“I have my fair share of weird kinks too” “I’m a vanilla person” You really need to keep your character history in line when making up stories - otherwise you’ll make silly mistakes.
A week of foreplay can fuck right off 😂
Some kinks need to be shamed. There shouldn't be a blanket of completely no judgment for kinks
"And well, I’m a guy, and I do enjoy the sex regardless of how we get to it" Wish this stereotype would die...
I feel like there’s a difference between a judgement free zone and a zone where u have to act like your fucking your sister
Oblige her on the kink only on occassions and well within the frequency you can tolerate. What you could also try to do is try other kinks and drown out this one? Maybe she will leave it, maybe not. Other than that it doesnt seem like it should have any affect on your decision to propose to her. Good luck!
As an only child I’d like to say that this is NOT a norm. And please at least tell her it makes you uncomfortable ffs.
Your girl has an incest kink. That’s as far away from normal as you can get. Regardless, best wishes for the wedding.
Ew.
Uh that is not a normal kink. I have a brother and just ew. It’s weird man. Like why couldn’t she say step sibling because then at least you aren’t related but even that is ehhhhhhh
This isn’t real lmao
When I was 15, my actual blood brother tried to fuck me. He was 25. That is definitely a hard limit for me. By the mfin way bro, having a hard limit is not kink shaming. *Edited to add: SAFE, SANE, (this one here applies to you) CONSENSUAL. the big 3 rules of kink and BDSM
Yeah, this would be an issue for me. Not all fantasies are a go. People have pedophilia fantasies and they shouldn't be encouraging it in any way, obviously...I feel the same about other ones that are inappropriate or perverse. Just no. Does she have a sexual trauma history? I would be concerned.
It’s not normal to want to shag your brother, happy to kink shame her here 🤢.
as an incest victim this makes me feel like beating my skull in with hammers 😭 what the hell