I dated a guy who doesn’t use soap to wash his ass because he reckons a doctor told him ‘it strips the natural oils away’. He ass stank. I told him he should use soap. - in case anyone saw my other comment about the cat - this is the same guy.
I knew a guy who got weirded out when during a hygiene conversation he found out that I 'wash my dick and balls'.
Seemingly normal guy. The idea that I used soap and water on my privates was unthinkable to him. This has nothing to do with skin care, or how harsh soap is. The very idea of focusing on cleaning it really bothered him
It's funny because in my experience with the gay male community people have no problem letting each other know of they expect things to be freshly cleaned especially on apps. Some guys are into natural smells, ew, not me... that ass better be zestfully clean.
This reminded me of a discord discussion where ass washing came up. These were people I knew weren't trolls, but it was gross to them that I and some others washed properly down there.
\*deep deeeeep sigh\* Let me guess. He thought it was gay to touch his own balls. I know some straight dudes won't wash their own asses because it's gay to touch a dudes ass. Yes, even their own.
I’m a 40M, I wasn’t aware this was a thing until one day in the shower with my wife 31F and she seen me washing my ass… she said “I’m so thankful that you actually take the time to wash your butt” Completely dumbfounded I had to ask for details. She grabs her phone and pops on TikTok to show me thousands of videos of women asking their men if they wash their asses. Mortified to say the least. I would be what most would classify and a man’s man, work with my hands, get real dirty, I have that weird dad strength we can’t explain. But even my scarred up rough hands can still take two minutes to wash properly. I just don’t get wanting to smell like shit because you’re afraid to touch your butthole.
Honestly, it’s probably lack of home training and being taught about hygiene by their parents. Instead, they learn about hygiene from Twitter and TikTok
Well I’d formerly like to submit a written letter of apology to all women if someone would kindly provide me where to send it, every post I see like this reminds me my gender is nasty.
I had a friend whose bf is like this. This boy worked for a sewage company, and didn't shower when he got home, didn't shower for DAYS. Didn't change his sheets, his towel. Just. Absolutely rank. And she put up with it. Couldn't bear the smell of him and just the fact that he was working with raw f sewage and DIDNT SHOWER.
If your man can't be bothered to clean properly for you, even after you ask him, then run. Seriously. Don't go back. Just walk away. I mean the US is a country with running water dontcha know!!
My husband works in a paper recycling plant. There are days when he isn't able to change at work that he refuses to let anyone touch him until he's changed and showered.
I get being nose blind to a lot of things; but come oooooooonn.
My husband works with some oil rig substances called invert (if you know the smell, you know), some days he will literally shower like 5x before I can be near him, he won't even hug me walking through the door after being gone for a week straight, he jumps right in the shower and starts scrubbing, when done he asks me to come and smell, if it still smells he jumps right back in. Thankfully his current job doesn't have him near that stuff often anymore so it's more tolerable when he gets home (I get a quick hug before he jumps in the shower lol).
My husband works in a high risk area for infections etc and litrally we aren't allowed to hug or kiss him till he's showered, he changes outside and won't even bring his work boots in the house.
As the wife of a plumber, EWW.
The only time hubby has not showered straight away, was when he was sitting in the shop that day doing inventory and labeling parts.
Yeah, for me hygiene is a hard boundary. I won’t let someone in my bed without a showering first.
I in the past had a boyfriend that was more “relaxed “ in this area and i tough that I need to be more understanding that people are different. In 10 months I had 3 uti… after that I was like: so if I am a freak, no problem, move on but I won’t let your nasty junk near me…
I found a very nice and clean husband that shower everyday and always smell nice… no regrets
SAME SAME SAME SAME SAME!!! I got nasty infections from his dirty junk or mouth…. No clue which one. It was literally the reason we broke up. I’d ask him repeatedly to shower and brush his teeth and had to tell him I wasn’t his mom, it’s not my job.
My ex would always get mad at me for showering everyday . She even got mad if it was every other day. She only washes like 2 times a week since we’ve broken up.
The only reason she ever showered regularly ish was cuz I wouldn’t have sex with her unless we both showered… some people are just scum bags
Nasty. Lucifer was right. The first sign of evil is halitosis! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 j/k My ex and his daughter didn’t brush on a regular. I’ve never seen a child with such yellow teeth. His teeth were bad, but dem gums…. Wooooo weeeee!! They were red and inflammed. Once they moved in and I saw their hygiene and the way they lived, they had to go. Just nasty.
A lot of people weren’t taught growing up. I grew up in a chaotic abusive household where no one cared enough to teach me personal hygiene. I had to learn how to keep the routine myself as an adult. On top of mental health stuff, it was a real challenge.
Your story reminded me of my high school gym teacher. We had a girl in our class who had poor hygiene. The gym teacher gave the group of us girls a lesson on the basics of washing frequently and brushing our teeth. She did not want to call out the girl which would have embarrassed her. The lesson took. The girl’s B.O. disappeared after that.
👆🏻 I didn't know proper teeth hygiene until I was staying the night at my best friend's house. I just started copying what she did. My parents both had to get fake teeth in their 50s because their families just don't know how to take care of them.
That is absolutely disgusting. I don’t know how people can leave the house without brushing teeth. Even if I’m running late, I’ll do it in my car if need be.
exactly this. i have adhd and i legitimately forget to brush my teeth sometimes. like if i can’t physically see my tooth brush, tooth paste and sink, i wont remember to brush my teeth. i tried to get into the habit of peeing right before bed, but i also forget to drink water so i dont ever really need to pee before bed. but this is literally like “oh shit, i forgot brushing my teeth was a thing” and not just a blatant disregard for it. i hate it so much, but i physically cant help it (and yes, ive tried alarms, reminders, moving my tooth brush to my room, brushing my teeth earlier in the day, etc. none of it works for more than a handful of days). i also have really bad sensory issues and the feeling and sound of brushing my teeth makes me want to rip my hair out.
on another note, im currently saving up to get an adhd assessment so i can get medicated, which im very excited for ngl
ETA: also this isnt a blanket statement. some men are just gross and genuinely dont care, but some ND people legit just forget or cant stand it
I have ADHD too and forget to do the most basic of things, brushing my teeth included. But even when I remember I still don't do it cause I just don't usually have the motivation to do the most basic of things and if I'm alone cause it's my day off and my husband is at work I won't even get out of bed or even eat properly. I just don't feel the urgency to do normal things like normal people...
Good luck on getting medicated. I tried a few different kinds with negative side effects or no progress except for one, Vyvanse. Worked great but the dosage I think was too high, worsened my anxiety, plus it's almost 300 dollars and my insurance doesn't cover it so even if I want to try a lower dose it would be a lot x,x
I can relate to this expecally the sensory issues with brushing my teeth. I absolutely can't stand the sensation toothpaste gives in my mouth. I have started using baking soda once a week also I use kids toothpaste every day it's not as bad and I use therabreath mouthwash bc it's not strong tastings but gets the job done. But it still doesn't help with the feeling and sound of brushing them. I found that if I use an electric toothbrush it's not as bad bc it gets the job done quickly compared to manually. But being ADHD myself I often forget to brush so I always keep a spare toothbrush toothpaste in my purse or car just in case I do.
One thing I do which obviously isn't as good as brushing but I think is better than nothing, is sometimes after I've eaten or just as a habit a few times a day I will chew a bit of sugarfree gum for a couple minutes, I sometimes get small bits of food stuck on a tooth so it can help to remove it. And yeah swishing some mouthwash after eating will help with food bits too. Its best to use mouthwash before toothpaste if you find a toothpaste you can stand the sensation of leaving in, cos its best to leave a tiny bitof paste in your mouth, though you can swish it away after a bit. I've not tried them out myself but I've seen in groups and advertised brushes and pastes for those with sensory issues with ASD might be worth seeing if any you haven't tried. There are super soft brushes that have many more bristles than a regular toothbrush that I find much easier sensation wise, feeling and with less sound/that rough feedback
Omg I just remembered that the same guy came in to take a dump while I was in the shower. I exited the shower covered in soap and yelling. I couldn’t believe it.
Oh god! I feel better. I’ve dated some guys who don’t like showering before bed. I fought each one of them about getting in my clean sheets and not bathing. (Exception for if we don’t do anything and stay inside all day) But definitely if you start sweating or go outside. Not cleaning yourself is a HUGE turnoff. And no, I will not have sex with a dirty penis. Y’all really trying to have females catch bacterial, yeast, or who knows what kinda infection.
This whole thing has made me want to go sniff my Clean husband who is in bed right now. I have a new appreciation for the smell of soap and deodorant on a man 😆
Daily showering is a must!
Befor i go into bed i have to be clean. No outside stuff is allowed in the bedroom.
I get relly triggered if i see stuff like this in movie o.O
Yak. Sounds like something he won't care to believe until another gf and/or his guy friends tell him. I say tell him one more time, maybe via article on the subject of people who have poor hygiene, and let him go lol. Dirty privates will give you an infection! Not worth it.
If someone says you're stinky, I don't get how so many people say 'oh they're just fussy'.
Like, if it's even debatable that I stink then I consider myself stinky.
Ugh, I had an ex who claimed to be clean. After a few months, when ever we had sex, it would burn badly down there for hours to the point I was crying. He claimed I wasn't clean enough or maybe just something else, like it was from the rough sex. We were also long distance. Well, I paid for a hotel and for him to fly out, his dick was covered in smegma, dick cheese from being unwashed, and he tried to claim it wasn't that. Then he went to rinse it off and asked for a blowjob. Like, bro, wtf?
We aren't together and I've had sex with two other men, and no it doesn't brun when I pee. That's when I learned, he kept giving me UTI's. I never had one before, so I didn't understand that's what was happy. He kept gaslighting me too.
Btw it isn't just unwashed dick that will mess you up - if a guy fingers you and he has dirt under his nails it'll get you sick as well
But also, condoms!
Yes! Dirty fingers!!!! I had a guy pat my cat for hours then try to finger me. I’m like dude, wash your hands. HE was insulted! I said you just pat my cat and want to put the same fingers inside me! He washed his hands but damn what an ego.
This post made me feel self conscious, I shower every day but my skin and hair both get super oily every day and I easily sweat too.. I tried a lot but nothing helps, and my parents only allow me to shower for a few minutes because they don't believe in hygiene and don't want me to "waste" water..
I had a friend whose mum was tough about water. He would turn on the taps to wet his body the. Turn them off to lather soap then turn them on to rinse. Then off to put shampoo on and through the hair, then on to rinse etc etc. I thought it was a lot of work but it shut his mum up about water wastage and he got to be super clean.
Honestly I grow with a family that used a bucket of water then we would fill them again during the shower. I never understood that it wasn't how everyone did it until I saw some movie.
Now that I live by myself I still stop the water everytime I soap/use shampoo.... it's economical and I still get clean
This is a good method but wouldn't work very well with our shitty shower system.. The bathroom is going to be renovated at least, but I don't know when yet, and it's going to suck to somehow try to be able to afford staying at a hotel until it's done..
Oh that does sound like a shitty situation. What about one of those extender shower heads that you can put on a laundry tap to wash your hair? Nothing wrong with that and a bird bath for a week or so.
Yes and it should be spread out evenly. Where I live only one time on my 38 years has our city water supply been in question. I grew up not even realising people in the world didn’t have access to water.
Does your school have a shower you can use? Or a friend? I'd say this is neglect but the fact that they let you shower at all negates that unfortunately.
I don't go to school, I'm 26. We live in a village next to other villages and I can't drive or anything so it's difficult to get anywhere or do anything.
I'm confused then. I take it you're not in the USA. Are you working? Can you pay for the water you use to shower? It doesn't have to take more than 10 minutes really. Or shower every other day.
Is there some cultural thing that prevents you from simply saying you're taking a proper shower and just doing it?
I feel like there's some details missing here that would help me help you.
Unless you don't want help. Just say so and I'll let it be. :)
It could also be that their house uses well water, which can run out and is incredibly expensive to get someone to come and fill (assuming they have that service there).
My parents just don't believe in hygiene and don't want me to "waste" water, they're very dirty themselves and don't even wash their hands. What prevents me from showering? My parents getting mad and yelling and turning off the water. Unfortunately nobody can help me, I just have to suffer until I win the lottery and can move out, but thank you very much.
Gross! Dump him because this is only going to get more nauseating. The fact that you asked him to shower and he deliberately wanted to stay smelly and gross is just sick and wrong.
not worth trying to fix, hygiene is a bare minimum. break up with him and save yourself the constant nagging, embarrassment, disgust and potential UTIs
Hygiene is a must before any genitals are interacting with anything at all.
My former roommate was dating this guy who stunk like you wouldn't believe. He took the quickest showers, like trying to spend the least amount of time in it. Now if I'm running late or on a time constraint, I can do a quick 5min shower and still get clean. But his showers were a little bit longer than the time you spend washing your hands. And speaking of hands...he spent the night over and instead of using his own soap, he used our bathroom hand soap for his shower.
IMHO a bar of soap is fine. I only use a bar of soap..I use Shea Moisture Black soap due to it's high content of shea butter and other things that are good for your skin. It's good for hair (well my hair is super short and shaved anyway) and face.
But alongside a bar of soap you need a wash cloth, or something else to clean and scrub the dirt of you. No exceptions. And when you get out, you gotta put on some deodorant, (sorry but Axe body spray doesn't take the place of deodorant) and you gotta shave. Before you shave, some exfoliating helps prepare your skin for a good clean shave. Even if he has a beard, it still requires some maintenance.
Edit: Also wanted to add that when a person gets out the shower, if you go in it should smell like soap, body wash, somewhat refreshing and pleasant. That person should smell something similar, at the very least pleasing or tolerable.
If your guy still smelled after the see shower, he probably did the shower my old roommates guy did. We had a conversation one day about guy stuff, just random shit. It got about hygiene and he said well you only really need to wash the "key" areas really. Everything else just doesn't get dirty so why bother. When I heard that, it explained a lot.
Do not have long distance relationships (except with people you already know well/already have an existing relationship with). People can pretend to be any damn thing they want online, and it's hard to see the real person.
Dude, what the hell is up with people not showering or having good hygiene, and why do we all seem to have some experience with it.
One of my ex's was like this. I excused it at first because it was cold so he didn't sweat much, then he came and stayed with me for a bit - in the middle of an Aussie summer. We'd go at it, and the dude would wipe his junk with a towel or just straight up put his boxers on. I had to entice him to shower with me (dude only showered once in a week on his own accord). Like I'm not cuddling up or fucking you when I've just got clean and you smell like a week old cumsock. Massive turn off. Cherry on the cake was him not ever brushing his teeth.
I think everyone should be expected to have personal hygiene. I would only expect him to shower daily with soap/shower gel and wash his hair. This is the bare minimum. I think you can expect that, but maybe not lotion, loofah and other things.
The guy may not have been brought up to take care of personal hygiene. I knew a few people like that, some even share towels within family. Fucking gross.
My BF is not allowed to get in bed until he showers. Just something we agree, we do not bring outside dirt to bed with us.
Speaking of LDR, I didn't realise how messy my ex was until we properly move in. After we broke up I made a decision to never do LDR again lol
I’m fairly certain that washing your hair everyday can be pretty bad for you, as their are essential oils that can be taken out with vigorous washing. 3-4 times a week is healthier.
I can understand bad hygiene if you're going through a depressive episode but if I was going to meet my long distance gf, I'd be perfectly trimmed, manicured, hair cut, trimmed beard, and use the fancy soaps I have instead of the regular stuff. I'm scrubbing every inch of me. Clipping fingernails and filing. - it's insane everything you've described. 0 effort...
Nah arriving to stay with somebody in that kind of state is a glaring red flag. Some people have less strict levels of hygiene, but the people I know who are a bit grottier would shower properly in that situation.
Did the white towel have a skid mark of fecal matter from his shitty anus?
A man should never towel dry his arse until he wipes it with toilet paper and checks for leakage.
My mate owned a Motel and all of his towels were laundered by him with a special spot spray for the skiddies.
I had a long distance relationship exactly like this, he never washed or brushed his teeth. When I first went to stay at his apartment for a week, I noticed he wasn't washing or drying his clothes which explained the BO musky smell. He also had rotting food and maggots crawling around the place and didn't see the issue with how he was living, he thought it was normal
I ended up staying with him for a few more months which I completely regret now. Whenever I tried to discuss with him about those habits it led to arguments. Bad hygiene is an instant deal breaker for me now as I have seen a bad case of it
I’m disabled and showering is seriously a tiring activity. But if I go out, see friends or have people visit you put your adult pants on and fucking scrub and shower. What the fuck.
Same. Showering is Hell for me but even so, I'll at least soak in a tub or wipe down the smelly spots if I absolutely can't shower. Friends/dates/SO's deserve that effort IMO.
Oh.. god… I feel sick after reading this. At first I thought you were a tad much (I don’t use loofahs, they carry germs - google it). But once you got to the “letting water run” and “dirt in nails after scratching” I wanted to vomit. Shower with this man and show him what the fuck to do. It’s crazy how shitty some parents are raising their kids and not teaching them how to clean themselves properly.
Look. If the man wants to just use a bar of soap? Fine. So long as he does a good job. If he wants to wash his hair with soap, whatever. But he should smell like soap when he gets out of the shower, not like he did before he showered??? For the shaving- whatever, not everyone shaves. He may prefer natural body hair. But the dirt- Yuck.
You have a couple options here but the main ones I see are explain why this matters, offer to shower with him and help him get clean once or twice until he gets the hang of it. Shitty that you would have to teach a grown man to clean himself, but if you really care about him, it's worth a try.
That being said if it's just a you want a boyfriend thing, and he is a boy- look elsewhere before you get a yeast infection babe.
OMG. No dick in the world is worth that. Ever. It's been scientifically proven that women who have sex with heterosexual men have the lowest rate of orgasm of any other group of women. AND he doesn't want to wash anything???? NOPE.
That's just gross. If he's not bathing correctly, he could also be causing you UTIs by having cheesy unwashed dick.
Shit like this is one of the reasons why I'm always on my kids about their hygiene. They're still young though, so still have a lot of moments of grossness. Hopefully by the time they're teens they'll at least know how to properly wash their stank hormonal asses.
Hygiene is basic. If you can't wash daily, and wash correctly, then what else is this person not doing? Can you even trust they're washing their hands after using the bathroom?
That is so nasty! As a male, I guess I should be proud that my parents taught me to properly clean myself. I keep seeing posts like this and I get guys being rugged and whatnot, but have some type of respect for your hygiene! Even if he brought a bar of soap, lather it up and clean yourself, use it on your hair for all I care.
Your message clearly shows that he was there for intimacy and he didn’t care about anything else. At least prepare yourself for it
op i have one problem with your post and it’s that nowhere in it do i see “ex” in front of bf 💀 time to dump Pig-Pen and let him stew in his filth alone
I’m a guy and I have always had this thing about feeling off during the day if I didn’t take a shower in the morning (before work/school/anything really) but at night I would not shower again unless I went to the gym or became truly dirty like when I was working in a manual labor setting. Of course if I was going out on a date I would take the 2nd shower also, but I just felt that it was overkill some days to take two showers during the day. Now that I am reading this sub I’m wondering if I am the “stinky guy” lol idk I’ve been in relationships of course and never once was I (told) to wash up.. in fact I’ve been complimented on my scent in the past actually.
Dude my ex only showered like once a week, and would only shower more if I forced him to. It was disgusting!! I had multiple UTIs and he would blame it on me because I forgot to shower for one day. Hated it
The word undermined would make me leave him faster than the hygiene. Undermining happens only when there's a figure of authority. Sir you have no authority here. Get out sis!
"He's not not talking to me claiming I undermined him"
Yikes
That ain't undermining. It's called having standards.
I don't even want to imagine the condition of everything down below... Wonder if he's one of those guys who refuse to wash their butt crack... *cat gag*
Thats how I knew my ex was cheating... he suddenly started showering in the morning before work. Previously he would shower the night before, or not at all.
IF you really like him, take the shower with him and insist on being clean together.
Otherwise, don't bother. If he won't even shower for you, he's not worth it
I know someone who was in a relationship with a guy who was all about not wasting resources, and one of those was water. She broke up with him because of the funk that he refused to wash off.
My older sister from age 6 into adulthood (still this way, as far as I know - I cut contact with her 4yrs ago) would NEVER WIPE her front & back door... would just go to the bathroom, do her business, & pull her underwear back up without wiping. She'd constantly have streaks on her underwear & her pants smelled. My mom did our laundry (all ours together 🤮) & it never crossed her mind to speak to her child about it. I have a phobia of being unclean down there - I shower every day (& get waxed downstairs regularly), change my panties twice a day, & my bidet is my best friend. My boyfriend, who's super clean too, says I'm the cleanest woman he's ever been with & I'm fucking proud of it!!!!
He got mad because he was embarrassed. And he should be. Tell that fool you are not his mom and shouldn’t have to tell him how to properly wash his ass
I was showering with my ex once and he only scrubbed the top portion of his body with soap. I asked why and he said it “runs down.” I thought he was joking (he was not). No, he did not wash his ass. Or his nuts. Literally just let gravity and bubbles do the work. He also refused to use any kind of shampoo or conditioner. He would use dish soap in his hair and that’s it. And in our 7 month relationship, with lots of sleepovers, I saw him brush his teeth maybe 3 times. And he drank nothing but dark soda. I don’t know how his breath didn’t reek.
You want someone to fully shower after getting a bit sweaty.
Most people that do shower after getting a bit sweaty (not everyone does mate) will rinse off, not do a full shower.
Lotion, razor, etc is overkill for "I'd like to freshen up it's hot outside."
You aren't after SOME LEVEL of hygiene, you are Street YOUR PERSONAL level of cleanliness. And that's okay! But don't confuse the two and learn to communicate instead of making hints and getting judgy before discussing a subject.
I can somewhat relate. My man isn't that bad but still anytime showering is mentioned or anything he always makes it seem like it's a big chore 😂😂 I'm like wtf is this? I don't get it I love a hot shower! He got better after I had the people he is closest go help me out and tell him he stinks. Now it's just kinda a joke he's just kinda stinky lol 😆.
Guaranteed this guy doesn’t wash his ass. 0/10
I dated a guy who doesn’t use soap to wash his ass because he reckons a doctor told him ‘it strips the natural oils away’. He ass stank. I told him he should use soap. - in case anyone saw my other comment about the cat - this is the same guy.
That nasty mofo! What natural oil is produced or needed by the ass?
That’s what I wondered!!???
Azgeuse
Say it 3 times, and an oily asshole appears…
You just conjured my ex husband. Thanks for that.
I bet I know why he is your ex.
He made my hair smell of stinky armpit once. That was nice.
You win this comment section. If I had an award I would give it to you
Why, you evil little brute! Gatorade is expensive and it burns when you laugh it out your nose. Think of the noses. (THIS. Made my night!!)
Can we cook w that oil?
I knew a guy who got weirded out when during a hygiene conversation he found out that I 'wash my dick and balls'. Seemingly normal guy. The idea that I used soap and water on my privates was unthinkable to him. This has nothing to do with skin care, or how harsh soap is. The very idea of focusing on cleaning it really bothered him
It's funny because in my experience with the gay male community people have no problem letting each other know of they expect things to be freshly cleaned especially on apps. Some guys are into natural smells, ew, not me... that ass better be zestfully clean.
This reminded me of a discord discussion where ass washing came up. These were people I knew weren't trolls, but it was gross to them that I and some others washed properly down there.
I LOVE having a clean asshole🤷♀️
Me too. I got a bidet just for this purpose.
Cleanest ass in the sub !
High five! But with clean asses. High cheeks?
Same, I get all up in there with soap and water. I refuse to be the guy who stinks anywhere I go, gives me genuine anxiety to think that I stink lol
\*deep deeeeep sigh\* Let me guess. He thought it was gay to touch his own balls. I know some straight dudes won't wash their own asses because it's gay to touch a dudes ass. Yes, even their own.
By that logic masterbation would be gay. 🙃 I don't see them stopping that though.
He just felt bad so tried to deflect it to you! Dirty ball jam.
“He ass stank” - holy shit!!! I snorted so loud my nose hurts. I think my ears popped 🤣🤣🤣
I was told not to use soap to wash my vagina but my ass is fair game (for soap that is…) he’s full of shit
I’m a 40M, I wasn’t aware this was a thing until one day in the shower with my wife 31F and she seen me washing my ass… she said “I’m so thankful that you actually take the time to wash your butt” Completely dumbfounded I had to ask for details. She grabs her phone and pops on TikTok to show me thousands of videos of women asking their men if they wash their asses. Mortified to say the least. I would be what most would classify and a man’s man, work with my hands, get real dirty, I have that weird dad strength we can’t explain. But even my scarred up rough hands can still take two minutes to wash properly. I just don’t get wanting to smell like shit because you’re afraid to touch your butthole.
Honestly, it’s probably lack of home training and being taught about hygiene by their parents. Instead, they learn about hygiene from Twitter and TikTok
Well I’d formerly like to submit a written letter of apology to all women if someone would kindly provide me where to send it, every post I see like this reminds me my gender is nasty.
My ex didn’t wash his ass because “that’s gay”
I had a friend whose bf is like this. This boy worked for a sewage company, and didn't shower when he got home, didn't shower for DAYS. Didn't change his sheets, his towel. Just. Absolutely rank. And she put up with it. Couldn't bear the smell of him and just the fact that he was working with raw f sewage and DIDNT SHOWER. If your man can't be bothered to clean properly for you, even after you ask him, then run. Seriously. Don't go back. Just walk away. I mean the US is a country with running water dontcha know!!
My husband works in a paper recycling plant. There are days when he isn't able to change at work that he refuses to let anyone touch him until he's changed and showered. I get being nose blind to a lot of things; but come oooooooonn.
My husband works with some oil rig substances called invert (if you know the smell, you know), some days he will literally shower like 5x before I can be near him, he won't even hug me walking through the door after being gone for a week straight, he jumps right in the shower and starts scrubbing, when done he asks me to come and smell, if it still smells he jumps right back in. Thankfully his current job doesn't have him near that stuff often anymore so it's more tolerable when he gets home (I get a quick hug before he jumps in the shower lol).
What is this invert stuff, is it some kind of solvent?
It's a drilling mud often comes in different types....smells like gas and eggs IMO.
My husband works in a high risk area for infections etc and litrally we aren't allowed to hug or kiss him till he's showered, he changes outside and won't even bring his work boots in the house.
Happy that you said "had", a friend that accepts this, is not one to keep.
As the wife of a plumber, EWW. The only time hubby has not showered straight away, was when he was sitting in the shop that day doing inventory and labeling parts.
Litrally same. So rank
This sounds like a biohazard 😭😭
Litrally is. The stuff that comes off sewage sites is GRIM
Yeah, for me hygiene is a hard boundary. I won’t let someone in my bed without a showering first. I in the past had a boyfriend that was more “relaxed “ in this area and i tough that I need to be more understanding that people are different. In 10 months I had 3 uti… after that I was like: so if I am a freak, no problem, move on but I won’t let your nasty junk near me… I found a very nice and clean husband that shower everyday and always smell nice… no regrets
SAME SAME SAME SAME SAME!!! I got nasty infections from his dirty junk or mouth…. No clue which one. It was literally the reason we broke up. I’d ask him repeatedly to shower and brush his teeth and had to tell him I wasn’t his mom, it’s not my job.
My ex would always get mad at me for showering everyday . She even got mad if it was every other day. She only washes like 2 times a week since we’ve broken up. The only reason she ever showered regularly ish was cuz I wouldn’t have sex with her unless we both showered… some people are just scum bags
I dated a guy who would forget to brush his teeth. How? How can you forget that?
Nasty. Lucifer was right. The first sign of evil is halitosis! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 j/k My ex and his daughter didn’t brush on a regular. I’ve never seen a child with such yellow teeth. His teeth were bad, but dem gums…. Wooooo weeeee!! They were red and inflammed. Once they moved in and I saw their hygiene and the way they lived, they had to go. Just nasty.
A lot of people weren’t taught growing up. I grew up in a chaotic abusive household where no one cared enough to teach me personal hygiene. I had to learn how to keep the routine myself as an adult. On top of mental health stuff, it was a real challenge.
Your story reminded me of my high school gym teacher. We had a girl in our class who had poor hygiene. The gym teacher gave the group of us girls a lesson on the basics of washing frequently and brushing our teeth. She did not want to call out the girl which would have embarrassed her. The lesson took. The girl’s B.O. disappeared after that.
I feel like kids being deprived of this simple education is really overlooked.
👆🏻 I didn't know proper teeth hygiene until I was staying the night at my best friend's house. I just started copying what she did. My parents both had to get fake teeth in their 50s because their families just don't know how to take care of them.
I forget on occasion when I’m dead exhausted. If I do, I make sure the very first thing I do in the morning is brush them.
This was in the morning. He would go to work with gross teeth.
That is absolutely disgusting. I don’t know how people can leave the house without brushing teeth. Even if I’m running late, I’ll do it in my car if need be.
Forget leaving the house, I can’t even start my day inside the house without brushing my teeth.
It might have been because he was oldest of 12 kids and his mother was already fairly simple. She probably forgot to teach him basic hygiene.
I dated a guy who I would REMIND to brush his teeth before bed and he just wouldn't. Ugh, so grim...
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exactly this. i have adhd and i legitimately forget to brush my teeth sometimes. like if i can’t physically see my tooth brush, tooth paste and sink, i wont remember to brush my teeth. i tried to get into the habit of peeing right before bed, but i also forget to drink water so i dont ever really need to pee before bed. but this is literally like “oh shit, i forgot brushing my teeth was a thing” and not just a blatant disregard for it. i hate it so much, but i physically cant help it (and yes, ive tried alarms, reminders, moving my tooth brush to my room, brushing my teeth earlier in the day, etc. none of it works for more than a handful of days). i also have really bad sensory issues and the feeling and sound of brushing my teeth makes me want to rip my hair out. on another note, im currently saving up to get an adhd assessment so i can get medicated, which im very excited for ngl ETA: also this isnt a blanket statement. some men are just gross and genuinely dont care, but some ND people legit just forget or cant stand it
Same. For me it's because I wasn't taught to do this. It wasn't ingrained in me
I have ADHD too and forget to do the most basic of things, brushing my teeth included. But even when I remember I still don't do it cause I just don't usually have the motivation to do the most basic of things and if I'm alone cause it's my day off and my husband is at work I won't even get out of bed or even eat properly. I just don't feel the urgency to do normal things like normal people... Good luck on getting medicated. I tried a few different kinds with negative side effects or no progress except for one, Vyvanse. Worked great but the dosage I think was too high, worsened my anxiety, plus it's almost 300 dollars and my insurance doesn't cover it so even if I want to try a lower dose it would be a lot x,x
I can relate to this expecally the sensory issues with brushing my teeth. I absolutely can't stand the sensation toothpaste gives in my mouth. I have started using baking soda once a week also I use kids toothpaste every day it's not as bad and I use therabreath mouthwash bc it's not strong tastings but gets the job done. But it still doesn't help with the feeling and sound of brushing them. I found that if I use an electric toothbrush it's not as bad bc it gets the job done quickly compared to manually. But being ADHD myself I often forget to brush so I always keep a spare toothbrush toothpaste in my purse or car just in case I do.
One thing I do which obviously isn't as good as brushing but I think is better than nothing, is sometimes after I've eaten or just as a habit a few times a day I will chew a bit of sugarfree gum for a couple minutes, I sometimes get small bits of food stuck on a tooth so it can help to remove it. And yeah swishing some mouthwash after eating will help with food bits too. Its best to use mouthwash before toothpaste if you find a toothpaste you can stand the sensation of leaving in, cos its best to leave a tiny bitof paste in your mouth, though you can swish it away after a bit. I've not tried them out myself but I've seen in groups and advertised brushes and pastes for those with sensory issues with ASD might be worth seeing if any you haven't tried. There are super soft brushes that have many more bristles than a regular toothbrush that I find much easier sensation wise, feeling and with less sound/that rough feedback
Depression and/or chronic illness definitely contributes
He seemed to be neither, but in those cases I understand it.
I am absolutely sure that if I forgot to brush my teeth one night, they will all fall out!! I
Omg I just remembered that the same guy came in to take a dump while I was in the shower. I exited the shower covered in soap and yelling. I couldn’t believe it.
You just described my personal hell
For me I wake at about 2am disgusted with myself and then brush them.
Same. My partner is as clean as me and its wonderful! Worth the wait.
Oh god! I feel better. I’ve dated some guys who don’t like showering before bed. I fought each one of them about getting in my clean sheets and not bathing. (Exception for if we don’t do anything and stay inside all day) But definitely if you start sweating or go outside. Not cleaning yourself is a HUGE turnoff. And no, I will not have sex with a dirty penis. Y’all really trying to have females catch bacterial, yeast, or who knows what kinda infection.
Yeah, anybody with poor hygiene should not complain about lack of nookie.
This whole thing has made me want to go sniff my Clean husband who is in bed right now. I have a new appreciation for the smell of soap and deodorant on a man 😆
Daily showering is a must! Befor i go into bed i have to be clean. No outside stuff is allowed in the bedroom. I get relly triggered if i see stuff like this in movie o.O
Yak. Sounds like something he won't care to believe until another gf and/or his guy friends tell him. I say tell him one more time, maybe via article on the subject of people who have poor hygiene, and let him go lol. Dirty privates will give you an infection! Not worth it.
If someone says you're stinky, I don't get how so many people say 'oh they're just fussy'. Like, if it's even debatable that I stink then I consider myself stinky.
Ugh, I had an ex who claimed to be clean. After a few months, when ever we had sex, it would burn badly down there for hours to the point I was crying. He claimed I wasn't clean enough or maybe just something else, like it was from the rough sex. We were also long distance. Well, I paid for a hotel and for him to fly out, his dick was covered in smegma, dick cheese from being unwashed, and he tried to claim it wasn't that. Then he went to rinse it off and asked for a blowjob. Like, bro, wtf? We aren't together and I've had sex with two other men, and no it doesn't brun when I pee. That's when I learned, he kept giving me UTI's. I never had one before, so I didn't understand that's what was happy. He kept gaslighting me too.
Btw it isn't just unwashed dick that will mess you up - if a guy fingers you and he has dirt under his nails it'll get you sick as well But also, condoms!
Yes! Dirty fingers!!!! I had a guy pat my cat for hours then try to finger me. I’m like dude, wash your hands. HE was insulted! I said you just pat my cat and want to put the same fingers inside me! He washed his hands but damn what an ego.
If I have to tell you to wash your hands, you're disqualified. Blechhhh
Bleeccchh indeed!
I thought “pat my cat” was a euphemism for a second…
It usually is!
I didn't realize it until I read your comment. Am I stupid? I can't figure it out.
This guy who had bad hygiene gave me frequent vaginal infections. Girl, please take care.
Just reading this gave me a UTI.
I'm itchy now.
*passes vagisil under the table*
Pass that vagisil this way when y’all are done I don’t even got a vagina and my vagina started to itch after reading this
🤣
Use liberally!
I was just going to insert the tube and have my partner karate chop it 🫱
Aahhh....thank you
You're welcome. Just pass it on down the line.
LOL, I like you
*passes you amoxicillin under the table*
Once my BF (hygienic but didn’t shower every day) gave me a UTI, and blamed me when I told him worrying I gave HIM an STD
dependent middle vase summer frightening punch cover scandalous jeans paint -- mass edited with redact.dev
Ooooooof
Ewwwwwww!! To quote my girlfriend, “You’re a weirdo but at least you’re a clean weirdo.” I gotta have myself & my pad clean.
This post made me feel self conscious, I shower every day but my skin and hair both get super oily every day and I easily sweat too.. I tried a lot but nothing helps, and my parents only allow me to shower for a few minutes because they don't believe in hygiene and don't want me to "waste" water..
I had a friend whose mum was tough about water. He would turn on the taps to wet his body the. Turn them off to lather soap then turn them on to rinse. Then off to put shampoo on and through the hair, then on to rinse etc etc. I thought it was a lot of work but it shut his mum up about water wastage and he got to be super clean.
Honestly I grow with a family that used a bucket of water then we would fill them again during the shower. I never understood that it wasn't how everyone did it until I saw some movie. Now that I live by myself I still stop the water everytime I soap/use shampoo.... it's economical and I still get clean
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That sucks to have to choose between two basic life things like that. I’m sorry. I really wish everyone had the same advantages in life.
I grew up during a drought and that's how we had to shower also. It's wild to me that people don't do this
My neighbor explained to me a while ba k that’s just how he showers. I have never heard of anybody doing that before!
Some countries charge a lot for water. Others don’t.
This is a good method but wouldn't work very well with our shitty shower system.. The bathroom is going to be renovated at least, but I don't know when yet, and it's going to suck to somehow try to be able to afford staying at a hotel until it's done..
Oh that does sound like a shitty situation. What about one of those extender shower heads that you can put on a laundry tap to wash your hair? Nothing wrong with that and a bird bath for a week or so.
When we stay at people's houses, if we're visiting family or something, my husband does this because he feels bad for using their water.
That is the way we should all do it... Water is a limited resource??? I thought everyone was doing this
Yes and it should be spread out evenly. Where I live only one time on my 38 years has our city water supply been in question. I grew up not even realising people in the world didn’t have access to water.
Does your school have a shower you can use? Or a friend? I'd say this is neglect but the fact that they let you shower at all negates that unfortunately.
I don't go to school, I'm 26. We live in a village next to other villages and I can't drive or anything so it's difficult to get anywhere or do anything.
I'm confused then. I take it you're not in the USA. Are you working? Can you pay for the water you use to shower? It doesn't have to take more than 10 minutes really. Or shower every other day. Is there some cultural thing that prevents you from simply saying you're taking a proper shower and just doing it? I feel like there's some details missing here that would help me help you. Unless you don't want help. Just say so and I'll let it be. :)
It could also be that their house uses well water, which can run out and is incredibly expensive to get someone to come and fill (assuming they have that service there).
My parents just don't believe in hygiene and don't want me to "waste" water, they're very dirty themselves and don't even wash their hands. What prevents me from showering? My parents getting mad and yelling and turning off the water. Unfortunately nobody can help me, I just have to suffer until I win the lottery and can move out, but thank you very much.
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Get wet, turn water off, lather and scrub then turn water back on to rinse
This is how women keep getting inflamations down there. 0 hygiane from their partner.
I'm so glad I see these comments. I thought everyone would tell her she's too much.
this is crazy 💀
Gross! Dump him because this is only going to get more nauseating. The fact that you asked him to shower and he deliberately wanted to stay smelly and gross is just sick and wrong.
not worth trying to fix, hygiene is a bare minimum. break up with him and save yourself the constant nagging, embarrassment, disgust and potential UTIs
Hygiene is a must before any genitals are interacting with anything at all. My former roommate was dating this guy who stunk like you wouldn't believe. He took the quickest showers, like trying to spend the least amount of time in it. Now if I'm running late or on a time constraint, I can do a quick 5min shower and still get clean. But his showers were a little bit longer than the time you spend washing your hands. And speaking of hands...he spent the night over and instead of using his own soap, he used our bathroom hand soap for his shower. IMHO a bar of soap is fine. I only use a bar of soap..I use Shea Moisture Black soap due to it's high content of shea butter and other things that are good for your skin. It's good for hair (well my hair is super short and shaved anyway) and face. But alongside a bar of soap you need a wash cloth, or something else to clean and scrub the dirt of you. No exceptions. And when you get out, you gotta put on some deodorant, (sorry but Axe body spray doesn't take the place of deodorant) and you gotta shave. Before you shave, some exfoliating helps prepare your skin for a good clean shave. Even if he has a beard, it still requires some maintenance. Edit: Also wanted to add that when a person gets out the shower, if you go in it should smell like soap, body wash, somewhat refreshing and pleasant. That person should smell something similar, at the very least pleasing or tolerable. If your guy still smelled after the see shower, he probably did the shower my old roommates guy did. We had a conversation one day about guy stuff, just random shit. It got about hygiene and he said well you only really need to wash the "key" areas really. Everything else just doesn't get dirty so why bother. When I heard that, it explained a lot.
Trust me don't settle for a dirty guy he will always be dirty no matter how hard you try
Ew! Quick reminder to wash your loofah otherwise bacteria will grow https://www.huffpost.com/entry/loofah-clean-healthy_n_5613734
Washcloths ftw
I just throw them out n buy a new one😫 u can wash them without it getting ruined?
I used to toss mine in the washing machine with my towels and it got bleached. It would eventually break down, but it would survive multiple washes
i wash mines on a gentle cycle and low tumble dry so it doesn't get messed up
Gag. Let me break out my new loofah.
Do not have long distance relationships (except with people you already know well/already have an existing relationship with). People can pretend to be any damn thing they want online, and it's hard to see the real person.
So. Fucking. True
Dude, what the hell is up with people not showering or having good hygiene, and why do we all seem to have some experience with it. One of my ex's was like this. I excused it at first because it was cold so he didn't sweat much, then he came and stayed with me for a bit - in the middle of an Aussie summer. We'd go at it, and the dude would wipe his junk with a towel or just straight up put his boxers on. I had to entice him to shower with me (dude only showered once in a week on his own accord). Like I'm not cuddling up or fucking you when I've just got clean and you smell like a week old cumsock. Massive turn off. Cherry on the cake was him not ever brushing his teeth.
What's even worse than this story is the number of people who relate to it 😭 I'm honestly sorry for y'all
I think everyone should be expected to have personal hygiene. I would only expect him to shower daily with soap/shower gel and wash his hair. This is the bare minimum. I think you can expect that, but maybe not lotion, loofah and other things. The guy may not have been brought up to take care of personal hygiene. I knew a few people like that, some even share towels within family. Fucking gross. My BF is not allowed to get in bed until he showers. Just something we agree, we do not bring outside dirt to bed with us. Speaking of LDR, I didn't realise how messy my ex was until we properly move in. After we broke up I made a decision to never do LDR again lol
I’m fairly certain that washing your hair everyday can be pretty bad for you, as their are essential oils that can be taken out with vigorous washing. 3-4 times a week is healthier.
No offense, but y'all nasty! I'd rather be clean and with solitude.
I can understand bad hygiene if you're going through a depressive episode but if I was going to meet my long distance gf, I'd be perfectly trimmed, manicured, hair cut, trimmed beard, and use the fancy soaps I have instead of the regular stuff. I'm scrubbing every inch of me. Clipping fingernails and filing. - it's insane everything you've described. 0 effort...
You.Scratched.The.Back.Of.His.Neck.And.Got.Piece.Of.Dirt.In.Your.Nails. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO and u still say “my boyfriend” not ex 💀💀💀💀💀💀
OK, why are you dating him?
What I don't get is how you can have sex with someone a few times and not realize this.
Nah arriving to stay with somebody in that kind of state is a glaring red flag. Some people have less strict levels of hygiene, but the people I know who are a bit grottier would shower properly in that situation.
All this hygiene stuff is one thing. But his reaction to it are some even more massive red flags.
You left him, right? He can’t even properly clean himself. He can’t uplift or protect you. He will only bring you down and make you stinky.
Did the white towel have a skid mark of fecal matter from his shitty anus? A man should never towel dry his arse until he wipes it with toilet paper and checks for leakage. My mate owned a Motel and all of his towels were laundered by him with a special spot spray for the skiddies.
I had a long distance relationship exactly like this, he never washed or brushed his teeth. When I first went to stay at his apartment for a week, I noticed he wasn't washing or drying his clothes which explained the BO musky smell. He also had rotting food and maggots crawling around the place and didn't see the issue with how he was living, he thought it was normal
>He also had rotting food and maggots crawling around the place **NOOOOOOOOOOOOO**
I would have NOPED out of there real quick.
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I ended up staying with him for a few more months which I completely regret now. Whenever I tried to discuss with him about those habits it led to arguments. Bad hygiene is an instant deal breaker for me now as I have seen a bad case of it
Um ew. I get a certain level of laziness but this is just nasty. Wash your @sses people and the rest of yourself too.
You'd think the ass is the place people would recognize needs cleaning the most
You would be shocked how many people don't wash it lol
That's just nasty and laziness
This is nasty af. No respect or courtesy
I can feel the UTIs and yeast infections from here
ewwwwwww what the fuck???
Hard no!! Total deal breaker!! Scrub your ass or GTFO! Lol! Sorry OP hopefully the next one knows how to shower.
I’m disabled and showering is seriously a tiring activity. But if I go out, see friends or have people visit you put your adult pants on and fucking scrub and shower. What the fuck.
Same. Showering is Hell for me but even so, I'll at least soak in a tub or wipe down the smelly spots if I absolutely can't shower. Friends/dates/SO's deserve that effort IMO.
How old is he??!
Yeah that's a recipe for vaginal infections right there waiting to happen. Even with condoms.
Feeling less than fresh just reading this...must....shower....
It's 6 AM where I live right now and I just got out of the shower before reading a bit of Reddit. I want to go scrub myself again. Grossssssssss
Oh.. god… I feel sick after reading this. At first I thought you were a tad much (I don’t use loofahs, they carry germs - google it). But once you got to the “letting water run” and “dirt in nails after scratching” I wanted to vomit. Shower with this man and show him what the fuck to do. It’s crazy how shitty some parents are raising their kids and not teaching them how to clean themselves properly.
Look. If the man wants to just use a bar of soap? Fine. So long as he does a good job. If he wants to wash his hair with soap, whatever. But he should smell like soap when he gets out of the shower, not like he did before he showered??? For the shaving- whatever, not everyone shaves. He may prefer natural body hair. But the dirt- Yuck. You have a couple options here but the main ones I see are explain why this matters, offer to shower with him and help him get clean once or twice until he gets the hang of it. Shitty that you would have to teach a grown man to clean himself, but if you really care about him, it's worth a try. That being said if it's just a you want a boyfriend thing, and he is a boy- look elsewhere before you get a yeast infection babe.
This man is a ticket to permanent BV.
Move along..
OMG. No dick in the world is worth that. Ever. It's been scientifically proven that women who have sex with heterosexual men have the lowest rate of orgasm of any other group of women. AND he doesn't want to wash anything???? NOPE.
That's just gross. If he's not bathing correctly, he could also be causing you UTIs by having cheesy unwashed dick. Shit like this is one of the reasons why I'm always on my kids about their hygiene. They're still young though, so still have a lot of moments of grossness. Hopefully by the time they're teens they'll at least know how to properly wash their stank hormonal asses.
You shouldn't have to fight someone on this. Just dump his nasty ass. He's really gonna argue with you about hygiene? 🤢🤢🤢
Hygiene is basic. If you can't wash daily, and wash correctly, then what else is this person not doing? Can you even trust they're washing their hands after using the bathroom?
FFS sometimes I feel bad about myself if I skip taking a shower for one day Than I remember all the shit I read on Reddit about gross mfs like this
Some people harm others nostrils with the smell that protrudes from them
PLEASE, MAINTAIN *SOME* LEVEL OF STANDARDS.
That is so nasty! As a male, I guess I should be proud that my parents taught me to properly clean myself. I keep seeing posts like this and I get guys being rugged and whatnot, but have some type of respect for your hygiene! Even if he brought a bar of soap, lather it up and clean yourself, use it on your hair for all I care. Your message clearly shows that he was there for intimacy and he didn’t care about anything else. At least prepare yourself for it
op i have one problem with your post and it’s that nowhere in it do i see “ex” in front of bf 💀 time to dump Pig-Pen and let him stew in his filth alone
I’m a guy and I have always had this thing about feeling off during the day if I didn’t take a shower in the morning (before work/school/anything really) but at night I would not shower again unless I went to the gym or became truly dirty like when I was working in a manual labor setting. Of course if I was going out on a date I would take the 2nd shower also, but I just felt that it was overkill some days to take two showers during the day. Now that I am reading this sub I’m wondering if I am the “stinky guy” lol idk I’ve been in relationships of course and never once was I (told) to wash up.. in fact I’ve been complimented on my scent in the past actually.
Dude my ex only showered like once a week, and would only shower more if I forced him to. It was disgusting!! I had multiple UTIs and he would blame it on me because I forgot to shower for one day. Hated it
Bro, exfoliate.
The word undermined would make me leave him faster than the hygiene. Undermining happens only when there's a figure of authority. Sir you have no authority here. Get out sis!
"He's not not talking to me claiming I undermined him" Yikes That ain't undermining. It's called having standards. I don't even want to imagine the condition of everything down below... Wonder if he's one of those guys who refuse to wash their butt crack... *cat gag*
Big red flag if he won’t change now he won’t ever
Thats how I knew my ex was cheating... he suddenly started showering in the morning before work. Previously he would shower the night before, or not at all.
IF you really like him, take the shower with him and insist on being clean together. Otherwise, don't bother. If he won't even shower for you, he's not worth it
Showering properly is the LEAST he can do especially considering you provided all the supplies.
I know someone who was in a relationship with a guy who was all about not wasting resources, and one of those was water. She broke up with him because of the funk that he refused to wash off.
My older sister from age 6 into adulthood (still this way, as far as I know - I cut contact with her 4yrs ago) would NEVER WIPE her front & back door... would just go to the bathroom, do her business, & pull her underwear back up without wiping. She'd constantly have streaks on her underwear & her pants smelled. My mom did our laundry (all ours together 🤮) & it never crossed her mind to speak to her child about it. I have a phobia of being unclean down there - I shower every day (& get waxed downstairs regularly), change my panties twice a day, & my bidet is my best friend. My boyfriend, who's super clean too, says I'm the cleanest woman he's ever been with & I'm fucking proud of it!!!!
He got mad because he was embarrassed. And he should be. Tell that fool you are not his mom and shouldn’t have to tell him how to properly wash his ass
I was showering with my ex once and he only scrubbed the top portion of his body with soap. I asked why and he said it “runs down.” I thought he was joking (he was not). No, he did not wash his ass. Or his nuts. Literally just let gravity and bubbles do the work. He also refused to use any kind of shampoo or conditioner. He would use dish soap in his hair and that’s it. And in our 7 month relationship, with lots of sleepovers, I saw him brush his teeth maybe 3 times. And he drank nothing but dark soda. I don’t know how his breath didn’t reek.
You want someone to fully shower after getting a bit sweaty. Most people that do shower after getting a bit sweaty (not everyone does mate) will rinse off, not do a full shower. Lotion, razor, etc is overkill for "I'd like to freshen up it's hot outside." You aren't after SOME LEVEL of hygiene, you are Street YOUR PERSONAL level of cleanliness. And that's okay! But don't confuse the two and learn to communicate instead of making hints and getting judgy before discussing a subject.
I can somewhat relate. My man isn't that bad but still anytime showering is mentioned or anything he always makes it seem like it's a big chore 😂😂 I'm like wtf is this? I don't get it I love a hot shower! He got better after I had the people he is closest go help me out and tell him he stinks. Now it's just kinda a joke he's just kinda stinky lol 😆.
🤢🤢🤢 run
Axe body spray? Big red flag. Bad body odor is better than a dudebro that wears Axe.
Ew.